Episode 091 ~To The Positive Will~

They say a few drinks; well, I only need one, but maybe this is one more addiction, the misery, the depression, and when I do “party?” Honestly, it’s a responsibility to feel good but with this week? “To A Positive Will”

Sunday, September 30, 2018

Episode 091 ~To The Positive Will~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, well first don’t spend all your money on liquor and Indiana Gone would tell you that you’re not much of a drinker; one glass of wine honestly and you’ve had more than one some occasions. Hell you still have how many Root “Beers” and a bottle of wine but you do understand that it can make you brave, bold and even full of bliss or “filling” that but you’re “trying” not to feel that at the moment *sigh* Alexa Bliss but you actually blew it on another MILF, such is your disappointment.

Regret, disappointment, and our good friend FEAR and shouldn’t we also talk about laziness, after today you won’t, I mean, it’s done, it’s over this week and even this moment besides wasting today, making a mess and worrying about tomorrow what’s left. That’s the thing, there’s nothing, for the past few weeks, it’s been sort of like the opposite of Pandora’s Box, every negative thing comes in, I burn it away with lust and rage, and I don’t know if hope is a phoenix or that she’s fled. Sometimes I envy people who can anesthetize themselves with anything and everything, drugs, drinks, or destruction, isn’t that what I do every week with Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Failed
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

One freaking point, you’re alive, I survived, and I’m telling you to live on more than bloodlust, retail therapy, fapping, being love stoned, and whatever else there is, Will, my friend you’re dying. Fire can cook food but too much or not enough and there’s danger, it can warm your home or burn it down, it can light the way or reveal Hell itself and what is it that you choose this week. No like any addict you want a hit and then you wait for the end of the world, and yes I’m harsh because at this rate what else is there I ask? I mean if it’s not rage, not sex, for damn sure you’re not a decent person with Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Why even bother changing the list this week, some people tell the day by the bottle that they drink as Bon Jovi put it, you know the day by all the stuff that you won’t do today, tomorrow, two days from now but let “Okay” come over, and suddenly you’re up. That’s the moral of the story Will, find something that gets you up, other than a woman that you won’t touch, or some other vice; To A Positive Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 090 ~Help Wanted Willing Writer~

There was a time I was willing to do almost anything for a paycheck, I picked up trash over the summer, was in the Navy about a month and worse of all RETAIL, but I’m not willing to do what I love… Help Wanted Willing Writer.

Saturday, September 29, 2018

Episode 090 ~Help Wanted Willing Writer~

Hey Lady Lu,
How to make One Million Dollars; I should, I must, and I keep telling myself I will and then I sleep a few more hours, I make another Pinterest gallery, I add another playlist to Spotify, good things come to those who pay, so I should start. That would involve getting a real job first of all, and I’ve already been over my current day job, and how many people don’t want me to have it because of my past and I’m not like them at all.

It sucks when you feel like you have the world on your shoulders, but I’m not trying to be Atlas, one more job that I don’t want to do this week, maybe I’m getting set up for tomorrow’s lists of failures. A book reviewer… well that would involve getting through another book, and I have so many on my plate as is, and what I’m reading now “Under His Heel” by Adara Wolf… I don’t hate the book as is but I’m not gay. I’m also not that helpful, I have ninety-nine reasons I’m not a doctor, make that one hundred, I don’t like people, but I am interested in the human anatomy and oh yes, pain, humiliation, even blood.

I like figuring out the mind, I was dreaming about pain, my current excuse as to why I didn’t go to the library today (back pain), but the thing is when I go into Sadism mode, that means I care enough to inflict it but when people are so worthless I rather not… See I’m attempting to figure myself out first, I believe you must do this before you can discover others but that doesn’t mean you can’t have help, my “father” taught me hatred disguised as love, my son showed me, unconditional love. What about women, because of my mother I seek wisdom, and other women gave me the power of choice, the will to be passionate, and the discovery of my private parts, I mentioned, I’m not gay.

So like Eikichi Onizuka, Dennis Hof, or Sir Mix-A-Lot, I like big butts, well I could go into more details but that’s Dirty Diana’s thing, so I want a job where I can stay in bed, listen to music, judge erotic themes that aren’t gay, and play with the human body lots. I want to inflict pain but not anything serious, I want to care, I want to explore and organize, and love the ladies.

Onizuka became a high school teacher, Mr. Hof owns brothels, Sir Mix-A-Lot was a rapper, and I want to write so why don’t I start with Help Wanted Willing Writer.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 089 ~Will Say, Won’t Write~

Don’t make me say it when all I want to do is sleep or any other way I choose to waste time, and then I write about the simplest things because the fiction never leads to the dream or better the reality. Will Say, Won’t Write

Friday, September 28, 2018

Episode 089 ~Will Say, Won’t Write~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How to make One Million Dollars, sharing all my secrets might do the trick, but with one year and nearly three months there is still so much left to confess, let’s hope no one ever asks for an FBI investigation, but you don’t need politics to establish power. The power of a word if I have learned anything this week, so that makes me feel sort of sad on this quest of having one million dollars in a year, well eleven months.

September is a crappy month anyway, and you have probably guessed why but I don’t want to say the words; honestly, it hurts so damn much, but again this week others have shown the courage that I lack. Not that I’m a survivor of sexual assault, now multiple suicide attempts, where do I begin, sleeping pills, painkillers, starvation, dehydration, And The Beat Goes On. Somethings I would never say out loud that I don’t mind bleeding on the page, but as I have said before, there are such things that I continue to let poison me despite my fictional sins.

Take yesterday how I have said I’ll talk about my ravishment fantasy… I have liked bondage since I first discovered sex, but I was never one for ropes and leather… whips possibly and when I came to understand ravishment and that it could be done Safe, Sane, Consensual… Back to my suicide attempts, I never wrote a letter, and I thought I was somewhat lazy, but how do I explain why I would do such a thing, hell knowing my parents they would never reveal the letter or worse they would change it. At this stage in the game, I will never write my signature in one of my books; I won’t ever give some girl my room number in a five-star hotel, how about a proper NDA agreement maybe?

Excuses though, if only they were so hard to write then, I would have time for everything else, today though on top of that there was a shopping list, a budget, so many texts, and great to see that McDonald’s Quarter Pounder with Cheese is living up to the hype. You see Lady Sophia it is that type of small talk that infuriates me but I can’t speak the truth and all those things that I want to say, that I wish to make so real Will Say, Won’t Write.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 088 ~Innocent Until Proven Willing~

They say boys will be boys but to hell with anybody telling me that, I was never the typical boy, and if you say I’ve grown up, well watching the news counts for something and what are my secrets. Innocent Until Proven Willing ha!

Thursday, September 27, 2018

Episode 088 ~Innocent Until Proven Willing~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
How to make One Million Dollars, become a Supreme Court Justice but who and I to judge… well I don’t drug women for starters, I wrestled with one playfully, and when she told me to stop I did, and “Lolicon” has always rubbed me the wrong way. I know a woman who’s into DDLG and other than pretty dresses I consider myself well, not precisely a daddy dom but if I were, I’m more DDMG or DDBG, so you know Diana.

Now why do I bring this up, because I know the difference between reality and fiction, I don’t have any need to bury my past, and as fucked up as my game is, I have my dominant side and don’t have to make excuses or convince people I’m not “evil.” Now that woman I told you about, she’s sweet, smart, and Somebody’s Baby but she joked with me about her fiancé like something out of “The Girl’s Guide of Depravity” because she’s horny, but he’s waiting until their wedding, so she wanted to rev him up with drugs. So I brought up this scene from Revenge of the Nerds between Lewis Skolnick and Betty Childs about how he tricked her into, but because she was into it, he got off with doing what he did.

Maybe today is about me attempting to justify my perversions; I read the works of this one author Roosh V, is he a racist, well I haven’t learned enough but is he a rapist, not that I know of because he said a girl would let you get away with such if she likes you or rich Mr. Trump? Then we have Brett Kavanaugh, did he do it, I don’t know but having Trump in your corner, demonizing a woman who has nothing to gain, and having people explain you were a kid when actual children get shot for nothing, and Bill Cosby getting locked up doesn’t help. It’s also not helping that a group of men only salivate to hear the sordid details like something out of Silver Linings Playbook but here’s the thing, stories about drunken parties, running trains on girls, sexy costumes, consensual questions, get me off.

Let me reiterate that I know the difference between fact and fiction, consent and illegal, but the stories Dirty Diana, I have this one fantasy about a friend who filmed herself drunk and I imagine her first time being “taken” or this MILF I know and this witchy costume… How about “Of Inner Demons,” “Vault Girls,” or this fetish for clothing, I want to search for one particular piece but the stories of why… one day we will talk about the Ravishment fantasy, but today I’m Innocent Until Proven Willing.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 087 ~Will Buys Some L’s~

If only I stuck to brunettes and not hot redheads, or girls that want me to work certain days and a manager that doesn’t know I will not tolerate, Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest but I’m still the loser here. Will Buys More L’s

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Episode 087 ~Will Buys Some L’s~

Forgive Me Echo,
How to make One Million Dollars or not because let’s be honest, I’m lazy, late, and driven by lust on the best of days and of course, this isn’t one, and I can’t remember the last one, to be honest. I wasn’t lazy at the day job, no, only a loser and yes this is going to be one more depressing conversation, I have noticed my viewership going down which is saying a lot and I want to say I don’t pay people to like me ever…

So should I explain what happened yesterday when DUMB asked me for money, and I reached into my pocket, as luck would have it I didn’t have enough but what is it they say, it’s the thought that counts? I’m continually complaining about money nowadays, and both DUMB and DUMBER are costing me because I don’t know how to deal with those assholes other than to lay back and take it, fuck, and I know Inspector Echo, watch the language.

Love is a bad word or even like which explains why I was such a lame brain today on Messenger but what am I afraid of, other than someone putting a pretty girl in front of me and I get all stupid? Hell if I let nature happen and give up this whole NO FAP nonsense I would be quite lucid most of the day, and I wouldn’t have to sit here in fear of tomorrow, but at least I told one of the managers no about work because I can’t let the anxiety go Inspector Echo, you know that.

Which leads me to why we’re talking now instead of hours ago, and it’s not that I’m lethargic, again I am afraid and you know something, perhaps that’s the silver lining; while I’m nowhere near courageous, I’m alive, I’m moving, and the movie ain’t over yet. However, am I lying to myself thinking that I can change it, I “try” to get healthier and every day it seems I get sick, I say I’m going to work, and then I repeat later on. Every Morning, the alarm lambastes me, and instead of fighting to stay awake or do something productive or constructive, I do nothing; sometimes even worse I go back to sleep, my hypocrisy.

“Fear does something strange to people like Al. But not you. Fear doesn’t shut you down, it wakes you up.” Tobias Eaton A.K.A. Four (Divergent)

Can you forgive me Inspector Echo, for being as low as I’ve been for… hell who knows, and again it’s lying to say things might get better, how about forgiveness for losing “loot” from motivation to rap right, I’m sorry for being lame and of course Will Buys More L’s.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 086 ~Will We Be Rich?~

Now I’m not saying she’s a golddigger, but the way I dig her and gold as well, though could you get a million dollars cash in a briefcase that would be awesome and yet she carries my heart around. “Will We Be Rich?”

Tuesday, September 25, 2018

Episode 086 ~Will We Be Rich?~

Dear Future Wife,
How to make One Million Dollars and I’m sure I told you before, but when I was a child, I thought that two hundred bucks would be enough to solve the 99 Problems I thought I had. While you’re my queen, my love, my goddess, my angel, I’m no King David a.k.a. DMX; I don’t hold much faith in a quarter of a million dollars because honestly we deserve more, our children deserve more, I know it.

I must sound like the typical rapper or worse my father because while I never want to be like him and I’ll deny it should you ever meet him… how long have we been married again, anyway a man takes care of his family without a doubt. Now I will sit here and sing All You Need Is Love, and you make me believe it but God I am becoming my father throwing money at everything and hoping that makes up for how I fail. Caesar was ambitious, and Chris Rock spoke about the difference between Rich and Wealth, and I want to be rich, but with you I’m wealthy… okay, who am I kidding, I want both my love.

I want to tell you every beautiful word in every language, and at the same time your beauty inspires me to write, and if anybody cares to listen, I want my words to set us for life. You know I am one for greed, and I want every breath you take, every beat of your heart, together we’ll make even more, and I never want to fear running out, every day I want to bask not only in This Year’s Love but as many years as we can get. Maybe it’s the idea if I have everything, I get to pick and choose, and I would always want you, not a day in the Hell of an old job, the rage that somehow vanished overnight when my heart became full of nothing but you, how much happiness did you have saved up for us both?

Perhaps it is wrong of me to spend yours. As people say, a man must build Heaven for an angel. Honestly, I was buying my way out of Hell, gathering every dollar I could, dreams to make C.R.E.A.M, from the pages I wrote. I Want To Be Rich, I won’t deny it, but I am wealthy because of you. I am because of my first born, the legacy of our other children and yet I ask Will We Be Rich?

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 085 ~Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust~

Too many sad friends to give into my misery, and trying to start this new week out of bed if I’m lucky but waiting to go to work and then after, my dose of the rage virus it seems, Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust.

Monday, September 24, 2018

Episode 085 ~Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust~

Fifty-First Rule Madam Justice

How to make One Million Dollars, I wish those ideas came as fast as things I’m mad at or how quickly I get hard, though I didn’t wake up with Morning Wood, no I woke up angry that every other part of me had to get up. I read somewhere that couples shouldn’t go to bed angry, and most nights I’m not sure how I feel, though I usually tell myself stories, I go over games in my head, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time maybe Detroit: Become Human.

Back when I had a full-time school schedule, though I remember a pretty girl here, or there it is the rage I embraced the most, and now, hell I can be angry that I don’t have time for gaming, the money for it, that I don’t have a pretty girl like North, Kara, or Chloe. I’m mad that already I feel sick and what did I do wrong, I woke up right when I wanted to, ate breakfast, I’m even talking to you this morning so why should I be in pain. How about the fact that I can’t have hope, no I’m afraid which only means I need more anger to fuel me because when I get to the day job, what happens then?

Wouldn’t indifference be worse, I either want your head on a stick or your head on a… yeah it’s easier to talk about hate as always, people more often than not prefer my misery and they want it with me smiling. Me and my dumbass smile, THIS I CANNOT DO (anymore) I mean, so either I’m a pervert, a psycho, but never a person and strangely enough that makes me mad because do I honestly want to be like any person I know nowadays. Everyone I like is suffering, the man I am, I still hate, which goes perfectly with hating the majority of human beings so yes indeed I enjoy looking at beautiful things.

The Beautiful People, maybe that’s why I want anger because I want to feel something other than anything to be ashamed of right; being mad makes me damn well normal but pictures of bodies one way or another gets you kicked off Pinterest but not today. For now, I’m angry that this day isn’t going as planned but I am in more control dear Madam Justice, surprisingly this rage and Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To think I can go anywhere I want, and I would prefer to stay in bed instead of putting these hands to work but I did take a step in the right direction, and maybe I can make another one this week. “Will Take The Wheel.”

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, coming from someone with a “history” of numbers that’s rich; no pun intended or maybe it is because if it’s not the 1, 2, 3’s it’s A, B, C, and of all the words not to like, DISCOMBOBULATED looks good on you. Well I mean if this is what gets you up in the morning, though you could have gotten up earlier… one of these days will be a positive one, maybe that should be on the list, like a million dollars.

Even now you want to complain about tomorrow and the day after, what about the next, and you’re looking for that silver lining, but it always comes back to the numbers, the two movies you want to see against how much you worked last week for example. The gas in your car, plus the two wheels that need replacing, and the money in your wallet and every excuse that I want to throw at you currently; If I Were A Rich Man. Complaining about cash is a big sign of adulting, especially in America, when your only concern becomes about money and how I wish for you that it overwhelms even your lust; because words are going to make you money I believe and that means more days fighting against “other passions” Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Completed
4. I Will Eat Breakfast Every Day
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Church.” By Stylo Fantome
Completed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

Well look at that, I said positive, and already last week I broke 17.5 to a solid 34 F one foot in front of the other, but you have to move faster, not quite as “quickly” as you Fapping nowadays ha, but again you need the car. Hell, the words should be even harder considering the tragedies besetting you from all sides, but you will no longer apologize for things that you aren’t responsible for to anybody and no that doesn’t go on the list. This week you might even get three things done, even if the book; yeah more negativity, no state the facts the erotica book club wanted to read another m/m and a long one at that, did I say that… words; but these Six Impossible Things.
1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Again other things should make this list but the point is to maintain control of yourself but you must also know when to let loose like I didn’t, I want people in the ground and yet I remained silent because the lady at work lost her husband. Respect right, but who respects you, such a concept comes from those that find themselves in; no, those who seize control and that is what you must do so Will Take The Wheel.

I Will Have No Fear

More Rest Than Art “Peace”

Was I looking for a miracle or a night’s sleep, I don’t believe in one, and I sleep too much to call it a night or maybe since I never know peace it’s hard to imagine it, but I held such hope for The Art of Peace. More Rest Than Art “Peace”

The dead don’t entirely rest in peace; I’m a zombie junkie so stop me if you heard this one *ahem* I read this because I watched “The Walking Dead” Season Six, Episode 4 “Here’s Not Here” I mean when has The Walking Dead ever been wrong… Already I want to make excuses for “The Art of Peace” I read it on my Kindle, maybe I was having a hard time when I read it, so I was exhausted, or I could have been expecting some grand miracle, well I finished it, does that count some, not that it’s so terrible.

Three stars without a doubt but for some reason I couldn’t stick with it, I took martial arts as a child, Karate not Aikido, so like back then do I blame the teacher or my “father” he indeed has better taste in books but I was looking for another man for guidance. I wonder why The Art of Peace became a prop for Lennie James a.k.a. Morgan Jones but shouldn’t I be blaming John Stevens who translated the book or more so Morihei Ueshiba who’s the author? Even now I wasn’t ready to read the paperback copy that I bought because I must be missing something, the urge to like this title is so strong within me, and it wasn’t the worst thing ever, but I was expecting so much.

Don’t get me wrong with the Kindle version I read you do get a big backstory on Morihei Ueshiba and in some parts; I can understand why he would develop such a philosophy for life after everything that he experienced. Maybe that’s the problem that he became decorated as so godlike, and despite the superhuman feats it came off more like someone who was only spouting a phrase here or there that sounded deep, and nobody wanted to challenge him. A lot wiser than the Bible without all the things that people attempt to hide but still an ideology that I couldn’t exactly get behind despite everything I highlighted within.

It could be that I was looking for that one moment from The Walking Dead and I might have found it but it didn’t resonate the same way with me; let me discover myself in a zombie apocalypse though and I might beg to reread this. As I said with the hope of proving myself and these three stars wrong and I wouldn’t mind learning Aikido maybe it’s the fact that I have no practical experience in the culture but then again I read erotica…

Maybe I read it too fast which is saying something with the fact that I fell asleep sometimes, not because of the book hopefully but I was attempting to push through when perhaps I should have practiced meditation on what I read. Once I got past the biography of the man, the wisdom was seen to a certain extent, as he said The Art of Peace is continually evolving over time and from one person to another which I find entirely true without a doubt.

If anything while reading this I wasn’t interested in fighting anyone, but I didn’t care to do much of anything else, maybe in a way I guess the book did its job though perhaps novel is the wrong word for this title as short as it was. What about that don’t judge a book by its cover because when I looked at the size of the book, I was already disappointed, and that’s why I snatched up my Kindle copy so quickly as well sadly. I don’t know whether peace is supposed to be so easy to have or so hard to understand, it’s there regardless of whichever you choose, and for me it was hard but wisdom is not to know acknowledgment in a day, and it took me quite a few to finish.

Perhaps it wasn’t as motivating as I hoped, most of the motivational jargon I’ve listened to and watched and read gets me ready to do something but this more to the point, and I keep saying it is to find peace. The pacing I found slow and somewhat repetitive, but that’s because well I’m human and see even now I’m beginning to feel I missed the point of the book entirely but I was thrown off by the history of the man and not by his great words. What about the “word art” I can’t honestly say that I got it, other than the fact that when I was younger, I did go through a phase of finding beauty in the Asian culture and for once I don’t only mean the women; does that make me sexist, I do wonder?

Again I return to The Walking Dead and the idea that I figured this book would change me but I was better off sticking with that moment of realization between Morgan and Eastman and while I continue to realize I need this peace, the practical application of it I have found daunting. Much like reading the book, yes when I get more time, I want to study it at least once more, and this time I will read the physical copy and see if that will help me understand better.

The Art of Peace did reawaken a bit of “Asian Persuasion” again in all areas such as ideology, anime, and Martial Arts, though I don’t think Aikido is for me, though if I could combine it with something else, I might give it a chance. Speaking of giving this book a chance, three stars out of five and the fact that I do want to reread it at that is high praise. There are five-star books that leave me wrecked that I don’t think I could rehash because there would be nothing left of me and so much for reviews.

With The Art of Peace, I know there is something more for me; if I only have the patience to find it which I suppose can be counted as a life lesson and wasn’t that the whole point, to learn something that will help me in my day to day life? In that regard, while I already mentioned the Bible, don’t expect this to help with your day to day life though it is easier to read honestly and isn’t likely to tell you, while you are divine that everybody is somehow trash. It doesn’t bring out the worst flaws of humanity but instead tells us there is a way to live however it does not tell me how not to punch-out my co-workers but rather why I shouldn’t truthfully.

Which is also one of the problems I’ve gone over, it has somewhat of a deep mysticism to it and while I do believe that Morihei Ueshiba was a gifted human being, given that this title is his true teachings it still seems a bit too incredible too much. Also with these ideas of life and I would be the first one to admit that my life isn’t exactly something to write about, I felt as though I was slogging through this for the most part. I feel as though The Art of War would be more to my liking even though The Art of Peace states that this is more the way of the warrior, so maybe by reading the other I will understand what I have read all the more in time maybe.

I can’t stress this enough but if not for The Walking Dead I probably wouldn’t have bothered with this, and I do feel somewhat the better for having read this and in trying to understand it, as best as I can. Though I wouldn’t suggest that you be at peace when you begin reading this; it will probably keep you from resting in because who has time to think about all the evils in the world when this is undoubtedly More Rest Than Art “Peace?”

Episode 083 ~Will Whisper To God~

What’s one more lazy day, I couldn’t scream to get up but one noise from my phone and it’s time to get to work, just in case right and let me say that church never got me to do that but the day job, my father, a pretty girl *sigh*. Will Whisper To God

Saturday, September 22, 2018

Episode 083 ~Will Whisper To God~

Hey Lady Lu,
How to make One Million Dollars; well I hear tell people will sell their souls to Satan for much less and give themselves to God for nothing at all and pretend that their Laughing With either or. I believe that the Devil gives better advice but at the same time what is the sum of human wisdom… I figured there was a good reason I dreamed about Alexandre Dumas, to the point, quotes and The Shawshank Redemption; more jail dreams just saying.

‘all human wisdom is contained in these two words, ‘Wait and Hope.” ― Alexandre Dumas

That seems to be my battle cry these days, and people have often told me I’m a good listener unless it’s something about me, and then they all turn into politicians, but hell I’m the same when it comes to listening to myself sadly. There’s never an argument when I have to get out of bed in the morning for the day job, no confusion when my little boy needs me to let him back in the house and when a beautiful girl comes calling, wow. If anything that’s what got me out of bed today, another pretty girl on “Whisper” did I ever tell you that’s how I met Indiana Gone, met another girl who couldn’t stand my face.

Now did she say that; not in so many words and now I got one more that disappeared all of a sudden and so I listen to my inner voice, and you know how they ask would you like you if you met you; yeah I hate that guy. The Devil Is A Lie, but she’s focused, and as I often say, everything I could ever want in this world is impossible, immoral, illegal, and insanity but not to her; does that make me sexist making the Devil female? It explains why God never had a chance, the Devil would, of course, garner my desire but God, Our Father, a black man that I could never talk to, oh yeah he’s always there right but these are not the days to cry out to him, roar, or scream, no you whisper Lady Lu, remember that.

It’s why the world is a mess right now and if we are born in God’s image; again, I don’t fear success, but I have seen what I do when I’m no longer whispering, the worlds I’ve created, the actions I have taken and yet I Will Whisper To God.

I Will Have No Fear