Month: February 2019

Episode 221 ~Can Be Border Will~

WillLeave a comment

Anywhere but here, indeed what do I do here but sleep and dream of something better and if I’m awake the little head isn’t helping either, always on edge and trust me that’s not glory, no somebody else is marrying “J Law” *sigh*. “Can Be Border Will”

Thursday, February 7, 2019

Episode 221 ~Can Be Border Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
How To Make One Million Dollars, become a private detective, think about it, I’ve already had some call me a stalker, like I would waste my time, then again how bored am I, idle hands and all. Take for example yesterday how I found another way to kill time, I take one photo of some European models and next thing you know I have a whole new gallery ready to go.

Pinterest is another time suck though that’s more “research” hell Dennis Hof built over half a dozen bordellos, filled with girls to his liking, only as “Cherry” pointed out I’m only creating a spank bank. I suppose some men dream of going to Bora, Bora, is moving to Las Vegas not big enough or more like Carson City, now that’s a life goal but while I want to tour the world one day “when” I get that far I want to run the place. Keeping my eyes open as it were but from the moment I was born, I became aware everything I wanted was wrong in one way, shape or form, the feminine form.

It’s like I have something akin to borderline personality disorder but then again what do I know, as a matter of fact, my Dirty Diana, what does anybody know about me… yeah, this is going to be less sexy than I hoped, but I’m on edge slightly. My relief is borne from my words hopefully. Even my characters are usually a bunch of smarty pants that read into their hustle, hoes, and hijinks; and this type of work I don’t find hard at all, and it would undoubtedly beat organizing shoes. Talk about boring, but it kept me from watching the clock and that I’m still doing; when your enemy is bound to show up any minute; knowing why you hate them so much honestly.

I could probably use a nice Bordeaux right about now if I were a drinker, but I only have one drug of choice, and I’m trying desperately to keep it under wraps because if I saw her or them naked… a man can dream. So much for my boredom am I right but let a man live in his fantasy even if it winds up sending him straight to Hell but the big head and the little one are stopping cold, and with good reason indeed; Can Be Border Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 220 ~Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will~

WillLeave a comment

Rule Fifteen, “I Take My Own Lumps,” if I do something wrong, I take responsibility, according to my motivations you must with every area life, even when other people are stupid, but like Spectrum it still sucks. “Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will”

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

Episode 220 ~Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
How To Make One Million Dollars, you know that I could “SUE” somebody… one of my coworkers, though to be fair he did mean well, I could sue the day job in general, and how about the “catalyst” for my writing; today isn’t so much my sins, so we call these things…

Ignorance, that’s why they don’t let me answer the door at the day job anymore, too afraid I’ll Let the Right One In, excuse me, I am a Real American, Let Me In, plus I’ve always had a thing for Chloë Grace Moretz, along with European witches, and Ellie from TLOU. And speaking of people that wouldn’t, shouldn’t, and that I couldn’t drag through my door because I’m innocent, I open my door to every Tom, Dick, And Harry, and I talk too damn much because nobody asks me anything honestly about myself unless they want to use me. Man, Monster, no I’m a moron, but I’ve seen what stupid people can do, they can become President, penis meet pornstar, they can be “freaking” Phenomenal.

I, however, am guiltless, now I’m not a saint, but I am selective of my sins, and as I said, today I didn’t do anything wrong or more like yesterday when I got called into the back and accused of missing six days of work, an excuse to get rid of me, and I ask you why Inspector. Am I that much of a danger to anyone… I mentioned the “catalyst,” and things I wasn’t guilty of but called anyway and the lesson, not all things are meant to know writing or reading and sometimes people will only offer you silence. My son B III was right, wanting to scare away anyone at the door because if he had succeeded, I wouldn’t be so paranoid but why is it so wrong to want to better my situation, have I ever mentioned how much Spectrum sucks.

Instead of, well you see I’m the nice guy, most girls never see the dominant, and while hating myself would count as a sin, I absolutely love that guy, commanding, controlling, capturing, like Shusaku, Isaku, the corporation in “StudioFow” movies, customers in Vault Girls; what if the government is correct, porno along with colluding isn’t a crime. Add that to the long list as to why I don’t break hearts, maybe I take things like this too seriously giving a part of yourself to someone and thinking they keep it and not throw it away. Most if not all of these things aren’t crimes though and yet the need to apologize only continues to grow, but not to my job or anyone here but to that innocent bystander in the mirror, Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 219 ~Will Walk With Me~

WillLeave a comment

“Run boy run” as the song goes and the sitting down only gives me more time to think about the job I’m running away from or getting kicked out of, what about exercise and then again Office Space much? “Will Walk With Me”

Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Episode 219 ~Will Walk With Me~

Dear Future Wife,
How To Make One Million Dollars, talk in a funny voice, maybe like the first time I asked you out, that moment at your door, how about getting a word in edgewise when we took B III for a walk. As always I am a traditionalist so was it standing there waiting for you or watching you walk down that aisle, the running to be by your side when I honestly “poured the Bisquick” and ta-da more kids, and then there are days like these my love.

You know how I guard my words but truthfully, walking up to you… it was like a graveyard at night, the first charge of a battle, taking Dante’s place in the Inferno but what did I expect wanting to reach an angel. It was wanting your company more than the air that I breathe and yet feeling like I’ve run a marathon, every breath, knock knees, heartbeats cascading with every footstep. “THEY,” say dogs know people but my little boy, “He Don’t Love You Like I Love You,” but with all his barking and pulling, hell that was an easy walk, and I took your hand in mine… where are we going, we didn’t ask.

All I know is that I wanted you beside me and again, I’m for tradition but not a church guy and yet there I was to know Heaven’s Light, and I asked myself what took me so long, time to make turtle soup, give up childish things. Only I’m not feeling my age; I want to teach the kids about Star Wars, rush back and forth watching The Walking Dead, even stand in line for movies the likes of Trolls. Today though all I want to ever know in this life is I’m Coming Home To You to rant, rave, respite, and relief lie imminent, to find rest, a moment where I never need travel.

It’s amazing how many steps I’ve taken for people that don’t give a shit about me (yeah I don’t like swearing, intelligent but a bit pedestrian) so the question is why did it take me so long to move towards, well something, someone that I love? Sometimes I’m not the man I want to be, sometimes I think I’m not the man you need, and when I was a boy it was walking no running, we can just lay here, only my love can you ask, Will Walk With Me.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 218 ~Anxiety’s A Bitch, Not Her~

WillLeave a comment

Dear Anxiety, she’s either the girl I am continually paying for, or she’s my “Daddy,” so it’s a good thing I’m finally sitting down to write this although it’s late, yeah anxiety never let me out to play. Anxiety’s A Bitch Not Her

Monday, February 4, 2019

Episode 218 ~Anxiety’s A Bitch, Not Her~

Seventieth Rule Madam Justice

How To Make One Million Dollars, Cosplay, though I’m not so sure it works the same way for males in that area and though I might sound redundant, while I have a million problems with my face, I’m somewhat cool with my body but not “gay for pay.” Yeah, I’m nobody’s bitch, and I would call myself out for my language but the title; anyway let me state for the record there are plenty of women I “dislike” but for the most part with them, a more proper president said:

“the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

Now I know, as always, this is more a conversation for Dirty Diana, I will call a girl plenty of things in a moment of passion, talk to the MILF or @courtscandyshop, but that’s more Dominant me than whoever I am at any given point. My “father” often talks about us being alike and haven’t I told you before he might hide his anxiety with pure anger but as for myself “THEY” say I wear my heart on my sleeve. These days it seems I like my anxiety, afternoon naps, and “ACHING” more than I like any girl and then I’m upset, but if there is any “bitch” I’m upset with, well, there’s a mirror.

You can’t call a girl a golddigger if you flash your cash, can’t blame her for getting scared when you give the Hunchback a run for his money, and when your fingers speak more truths than your mouth well, that’s how we roll. I need to break-up with my anxiety, and as far as dumping someone, now that’s a talk to have with Inspector Echo, maybe I should be like Sheldon and have a council of ladies at some point right? Perhaps Anxiety is like the best friend, and while I may have fantasies of two girls at the same damn time, she shouldn’t be one of them of course.

Another way of looking at it is that I’m being stalked by it and you know me, I don’t want to hurt anyone surprisingly enough, so I attempt to stay far away, and I keep myself from having any real true blue life. As my motivations go, take responsibility for my life, there are three girls I’m thinking of tonight, but I am far from a player, must mean I need to fire the fourth ugly chick from my stable… Anxiety’s A Bitch Not Her.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 217 ~Will Hunts Big Game~

WillLeave a comment

Does fishing count as hunting and how about when you feel like more the prey than the one hunter, and with these “fangs” of mine I would never be caught smiling though there is so much that I want. “Will Hunts Big Game.”

Sunday, February 3, 2019

Episode 217 ~Will Hunts Big Game~

To Will:
How To Make A Million Dollars, get yourself one of those helmets like Daft Punk and become an artist of merit and then maybe just maybe, you might Get Lucky, or so you think right? Suppose you’re creepy enough that you should let your quarry see you and while you hate the concept of hunting, you can at least make it fair, you’re not a liar are you; well other than to yourself, but it also explains why you have told yourself that story of D’Leh and Evolet.

Shhh, be very, very quiet, yeah right Super Bowl Sunday and all, but if you’re not looking forward to that, what is it you’re searching for; the Beast had it easy, Belle came to him. Cyrano had all the time in the world to get used to his nose, and Bobby Brown/Michael in Two Can Play That Game, well, you know. Anyway answer the question what do you want Will, a clock big enough to encompass the time needed for B III to live, to see you make something of your life; Level 14 on the 13th remember that. Virtues made bigger and vices smaller, now that is all kinds of dirty but speaking of the muck and the mire what about this list getting even greater, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 035 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
    Failed
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
    Failed
  5. I Will Read “Lolita” Vladimir Nabokov
    Failed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

A big fat zero, has it been so long… hell maybe you should find the day to shoot down, rub out and clean this list but yes this is my fault even with all the time in the world to “TRY” and do something. Now you don’t even remember how long this particular list has known to repeat, other than five and that was about two weeks ago, again there is so much to read and learn. Nice if you did that in a dentist office too don’t you think; no you’re wanting to keep C-Notes because you know what you’re looking for next isn’t that right, but shouldn’t you focus on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
  5. I Will Read “Lolita” Vladimir Nabokov
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

Always or at least according to your motivations you should be a better man than you were yesterday and honestly when you’re hiding so much, the mirror is bothering you more and more, how do hunters take pictures of their kills, yeah you’re killing yourself, Will, figuratively speaking. Hello, honestly, you practice saying that in the mirror constantly to hide, you sing it to “Triple B” and isn’t he in the same predicament mouth-wise, and of course, you want to text it to the other MILF but that takes heart, and such matters, seriously Will sigh Will Hunts Big Game.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 216 ~Its Ads Up, Will~

WillLeave a comment

The price of growing up free, you can take that in so many different ways, but I believe somebody said too damn high, and that makes my pillow the softest, safest, and most sellable thing ever. Its Ads Up Will.

Saturday, February 2, 2019

Episode 216 ~Its Ads Up, Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, perhaps being a pillow spokesmodel, the poster boy for energy shots, a pretty good example of why we need contraceptives in the universe may be. A plum lesson on how pretty girls control guys or maybe not, on the one hand, I sang to a girl on the other the MILF in her sexy lingerie hasn’t talked me out of any more money but vacations in San Diego, I mean seriously?

Speaking of possibly warmer climates, doesn’t that make me more human, that I have to talk myself into saving me, I think I need a Super Bowl ad and even those have been getting worse by the year and you know I’m not a sports fan. If you went by my Spotify you might think, I’m the most motivated man in existence; I don’t remember the last thing I listened to other than speeches, oh yeah singing to “Indiana Gone” and even that was depressing. B III might like to write a letter to whoever makes my clothes, not sure if it’s cotton but he keeps finding ways to lie on me, hell by his standards I’m probably second only to the sun I think.

If you look at my Amazon, it’s quite clear that I’m a shut-in or at least a closed off person judging by my gaming collection and books; I’m a story oriented type of individual to be sure from Detroit: Become Human to Far Cry 5 and I’m still not reading Lolita as I should be. So when we look at my search history, and you would think I’m either highly educated, someone that needs to be locked up behind bars or in a white padded cell. Again look at all my searches in the book Lolita for stuff I don’t understand in French and then finding myself looking at words like TERATOPHILIA… my last novel. My Pinterest and my Instagram, well two more reasons I’m a dominant and inspiring brothel owner, but they don’t have business plans for those things.

My point is as I’m always saying is that everything I want is impossible, immoral, illegal, and insane so you can’t sell to me, you either want nothing or everything and you know where I fall into, and it’s too damn much. A few hours of my time, a few words, courage, a heart, having some balls, guts, then again yesterday I told Pizza Hut they were too high, $24.00 not to deliver a pizza and for damn sure I ain’t paying MORE to pick one up because everything in life, Its Ads Up, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 215 ~Forty, William To Will~

WillLeave a comment

All it takes to motivate me, sleep, sex, or a speech and that also explains why I’m not writing, and at this rate, I’ll never make it to forty but then what’s my age again… does it matter to the man in the mirror? Forty, William To Will, but not yet.

Friday, February 1, 2019

Episode 215 ~Forty, William To Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How To Make One Million Dollars, forget who you are; can’t say I have ever seen myself as an actor, I don’t use a pen name, I have nothing but respect for porn stars but “Willie Long Stroke” will probably never see the light of day, and B III is camera shy. We are who we choose to be, but the thing is I feel sort of like a transformer instead of one that should constantly “EVOL” if you spell that backward you get love but anyway it’s like every day I forget who I am to be either worse or what others expect and then you.

I need you to remind me of whoever; leave it to a man to want to know what he looks like through a woman’s eyes… in touch with his feminine side, someone said about Todd Chrisley. Make no mistake Lady Sophia, I would fuck the Hell out of Savannah Chrisley (watch your language) needed to get some manhood points back after this morning finally losing my “No Fap” streak after forty days. All it took was Court Carmody, my MILF pornstar, Savannah Chrisley, Ellen Page, and Sabrina Nichole; can’t say I’m not equal opportunity pervert.

A man can say more with a woman on his arm than anything but god I love writing, and so you ask me Lady Sophia why I’m not doing it more often, why don’t I FOCUS… hell, I need to write a list of words like that. No, I would rather listen, if you asked me did my father ever give me any sage advice then the answer is no, but I spend my days on Spotify getting MOTIVATED by Eric Thomas, Tom Bilyeu, Fearless Motivation. On Youtube I see videos of Greg Plitt, Will Smith; I read Dennis Hof and how I am trying to finish Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, never too old to stop learning, a plethora of dirty things made so dull.

Something I never want to be, BORING, AVERAGE, a TRYER and I’m possibly that much worse Lady Sophia but mostly I’m EXHAUSTED, and as the song goes, It Doesn’t Matter, but here we are having wasted another day. In a little more than five years I will be forty, and if I live that long I can’t only be Will, I refuse, but I see a better man slipping away daily, Forty, William To Will.

I Will Have No Fear