Sunday, December 16, 2018

Episode 168 ~Will In The Placebo~

To Will:
How To Make One Million Dollars, don’t be the smartest person in the room; I read somewhere once that if you’re the brightest bulb in the box, you’re in the wrong place… explains why you keep “B III” around. According to your Motivations, it always comes down to who’s the hungriest, who’s willing to do Whatever It Takes, who dare I say loves the most and that is where we get into the placebo effect of what it means to be alive now.

You are your father’s son; I remember being in his truck and him pointing out to a structure in the distance and him asking if I knew what it was, I didn’t naturally, but it’s called a gazebo; it wasn’t a real lesson, lip service or a lasting impression moment, he just wanted to be smarter. As with most of your life, you haven’t wanted to last, love, or ever truly live; you know why you don’t care for lying, because you know how it feels to do it to yourself, you stay in this place you couldn’t name and let everyone else give your existence meaning. In saying that, you also know that it’s mom’s birthday, is it an insult to her this farce, parody, mockery, and any of words you can find in a thesaurus to know This Is Your Life moment to moment, these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
    Failed
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
    Failed
  5. I Will Finish One Book Besides “Begging For It” Todd Michaels
    Failed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

One point, you are still alive, Will and the placenta sigh another one of your Motivations, your Comfort Zone is your enemy and where are you at this very moment as we’re talking? Could you conceive what it might be like to live like you see ants marching across the kitchen floor, “Triple B’s” area, the bathtub (aren’t you glad you won that war), how about doing your math homework in class, or rushing out in a frozen car to the day job. How about living like you’re working for NaNoWriMo year round, maybe as though you’re wanting to please some girl, that rush to protect B III, living for the hate or the love, what about Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
  5. I Will Finish The Golden Line: (Knotted Book 1), Addison Cain
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

You’re not sick Will, you’re not dead, and you’re definitely not still in the womb and as much as you confess I’ll Always Love My Mama, the way you love your little boy, and think quite fondly of a few women, when will you recognize yourself in the mirror? You don’t have to know all there is to know in the distance, you don’t need to be comfortable all the time (you should know that better than anyone), and you don’t have to be the hero, the victim, or even the villain. Only don’t be mediocre, Live Your Life, don’t be Will In The Placebo.

I Will Have No Fear