Tag: Therapy

Tale 085 ~I’d B Worried, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Some people worry that their next breath will be their last. I worry “my” next breath ain’t. Don’t I sound like an ungrateful so-and-so? And I worry too much, from fur kids to books, where’s all the money going. And me? I’d B Worried, Virgil

Sunday, September 24, 2023

Tale 085 ~I’d B Worried, Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now… which means my only concerns are making more money and who to hurt next. So poor you.

In spirit, simoleons, Stuff and Thangs, etcetera. Tears are the only thing there’s plenty of. It’s not even 5:30 a.m. yet. And you’ve already been crying. And not over Braxton? Well, he’s always had something to do with it. And Sunday was never your favorite day. Every day that ends in Y. That’s existence for ya. And then you ask what’s wrong with V, huh? That’s something he has in common with Braxton. He feels what you feel… Do Better. Get Well? Or, as the kids would say, Get Good. “Life’s a game for everyone.” But no, you still don’t believe love is a prize. That should be a gift. And as much as you hate E-Day, what did you get? Uh, Six Impossible Things?

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising (OR) Any Other Title
    Completed “Revelation (Pessumae Christi),” Imogen Linn
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 051 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 058 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

And at least four of them you’ve owned forever. Like the books, you ain’t reading. Speaking of books, you must finish “A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising: A Novel.” Or what? Amazon will come and get you? Billionaires hurt people, am I right? But it’s not people you’re interested in hurting… Sadist, though you are. No, it’s Braxton. Hell! He’s still dead. But in remembering his death and reading about other fur babies. Which all the books say you shouldn’t do. Somehow, it keeps you awake and alive. You’ve only begun this week, and you feel dead inside as I did. And not because of E-Day or the vampires. I’d B worry that the day and books hold sway over you. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising: A Novel (For Kindle)
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 058 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Oh, you know they don’t. But I was working outside yesterday and again thinking about all the books you have yet to read. Hometown Hero (The Breeder Book 1), Witch Girl Study Group: The Complete Series, Backyard Dungeon 2: A Reverse Portal Fantasy, etcetera. Sensing a pattern. You’ll have to ask Braxton about quitting fur baby books. What about the fence that could fall down any day now? And you’re money situation. Then there’s the Day Job. And did the pants I bought yesterday even fit you? You know the real worries? Are you forgetting your son Braxton, the freeloader Virgil Vivi? Turning into a Republican trying to turn off the world. And to sleep forever. Dangerous Thoughts. But so’s Existence. I’d B Worried, Virgil

966 Days Without B III, Day 407 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 084 ~Virgil, We Gonna B~

WillLeave a comment

I didn’t know what to tell Braxton while he was dying. And I don’t know what to tell Virgil while he’s living. But they both sat in the same car seat, and I was trying to remember how to breathe. I was broke in more ways than one. Virgil, We Gonna B.

Saturday, September 23, 2023

Tale 084 ~Virgil, We Gonna B~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Alright. Why do I tell myself this lie every morning? You don’t have to wake up.

So, is the night worse? Hell! Anytime I get to close my eyes, I consider it a win, Lady Lu. If anything, I need to count “my” blessings. I need to show gratitude this morning. There is money to spend this Saturday… Did I say that out loud for real? I mean, I did buy another audiobook. And since you know Lady Lunalesca, I won’t be finishing “A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising: A Novel.” Not today anyway, Lunalesca. There’s not a moment that goes by without bad news. I’ve got seven days to finish. Anyway, back to gratitude, AHEM. I’m keeping Imogen Linn in business reading about the Pessumae Christi. I’m learning new words like “Meretrix.” He who increases knowledge increases sorrow. Right…

No wonder Republicans would choose to stay STUPID and angry. And you know me, Lady Lunalesca. I’m always angry… and afraid. But I don’t want to be STUPID. Not ever. But where was I? Oh yeah. Blacked has their merchandise back in stock. What would M Anime think about that? And I’ve been going on for days about character customizations. As if I have time to worry about the book I was writing about Cherry… to a certain degree, Luna. I checked the Day Job schedule. I’m still broke, but with so many hours, Ha. Again, gratitude? How about that the fence hasn’t fallen? But who knows, it’s dark out. Braxton would be going crazy. Lunalesca, did you think I forgot about him? Virgil’s alright.

Oh, he’ll never be my son. That’s pretty harsh. More like both he and I will never be, B III. Did you see what I did there? It wasn’t much of nothing. I’ll never be much of nothing, even after this thirty-ninth “Exist Day.” Before that was M Anime’s thirty-fifth birthday. Yabbos? I meant to use the B-word, but you know how the critic gets. But I’ll always be obsessed with them. And whatever pair I’m blessed with seeing today while out and about, hmm. Broke, even more than now, is something I can expect as well. Shopping, existing, failing. Because B ain’t here. And how are we gonna be alright without my firstborn, Lunalesca? Breathing’s what I do. That’s existence. Virgil, We Gonna B

965 Days Without B III, Day 406 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 078 ~Virgil Gives Up B~

WillLeave a comment

400 days, and V’s still here. B was here for 15 years, and he never gave up. No. I gave up on him when I saw how hard he was fighting. I wish I had such fight in me. To do what? Making the world a better place? Giving Virgil a home? Virgil Gives Up B

Sunday, September 17, 2023

Tale 078 ~Virgil Gives Up B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now… but you’re not. Want to know how I know besides the obvious? You, Help, Hide, And Hope.

Who are you, the freaking FBI? You know, with the whole Run, Hide, Or Fight script. I swear you could go on for days about not living in a sane country. But staying in bed… Well, that’s a luxury you don’t have. So you might as well live it up for the next forty-five minutes. Hmm… Yeah, help yourself to The Pic Phenomenon and another dirty book. You can keep spending the money you don’t have. It was not an issue when I was trying to save Braxton’s life. I failed. And for the past few days, you’ve been trying to think of things to make the freeloader… Virgil’s life a little better. A big payday? Uh, This is America! Help yourself… Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising (OR) Any Other Title
    Completed “Initiation (Pessumae Christi),” Imogen Linn
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 044 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 051 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I can’t hide from the fact that I don’t know what I’m doing. Neither will you. “Crime, it’s the way I fly to you,” as the song goes. And here you thought that breaking the law was supposed to make you smarter… It works that way in all the superhero flicks. But, “This ain’t no place for no hero to call home.” And you’re no hero. Never a Smooth Criminal. You’re bitcoin, temporary emails, one-time use debit cards. Hell! You’re starting to think criminals don’t want your business. And as far as being a big dog, a boss hog, yourself? No! You don’t take people’s money from ATMs. You make sure Virgil has food in Braxton’s bowl. Sigh. Buy him something. Do Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising (OR) Any Other Title
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 051 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

This week, you will give up as I did the last one. Has Virgil given up? I hope not. Because as you are on your pop culture rant. Didn’t 2009’s “The Road” say something about dreaming of bad things? And it means you’re “existing” and fighting. My dreams sigh. No wonder you were up at a somewhat reasonable hour, 5:00 a.m. And again, what did you do with those two hours? You hoped you could look at some Yabbos and finish reading about a nun hooking up with five priests -as if that’d make you a little less dumb. Braxton knew there was no helping you. Virgil dreams of a place called home. Is that what Virgil howls to B about? Virgil Gives Up B

959 Days Without B III, Day 400 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 077 ~A W, V, Braxton~

WillLeave a comment

When first I saw Virgil, I heard Braxton’s “voice,” saying… I can’t make this more black and white, Dad, pick him up. And he made bosoms look nice the way he would cuddle Carolina’s. And then money or the lack thereof. Don’t I want “A W, V, Braxton?”

Saturday, September 16, 2023

Tale 077 ~A W, V, Braxton~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… sigh, and it’s still not enough. I want it all, and I want it right now.

Stupid, greedy, getting naughty in the dark… I promise you, Lady Lunalesca, I’m not joining the GOP. And yet… Well, I’m mad at what happened at the bank yesterday. Hmm. There are worse things. Braxton is not getting any deader. Wow! That’s pretty harsh. Right? And when’s the last time I heard from Braxton? This morning, I suppose. Sucker Punch. Lunalesca, I mean both the feeling and the song from the movie I Want It All/We Will Rock You Mashup. So what is it my son is trying to tell me, Lunalesca? I don’t know. Thirty-nine years of existence, and I’m still confused as all Hell. Or scared to death. Please! “It’s foolish to ask for luxuries in times like these.” Pop culture’s popping today.

Unlike other things… And Braxton wouldn’t want me that happy, like him with his toys. But in all the things I’ve read and listened to. I swear between Eric Vall’s Harem romances and Imogen Linn’s Erotica. I’m keeping them both in business. There are also vampires. Like I was telling Lady Sophia yesterday. I didn’t have time for that. Winning? Victory? Each book is just that, Lady Lunalesca. Whether I’m reading or writing. There’s no time. Hell! I told B all the time. Once I get this done… What, become a wealthy man? When I have a bunch of women in bed? Let’s have the world wrapped around my finger. But with love, aren’t you already winning? Is that what Braxton is trying to say?

I don’t know if I told you about the two days I had people buy me breakfast and lunch out of the blue. And as much as I hate both the Day Job and E-Day, I got free food, right? And now, yesterday, I see someone left their money in the cash tray at the ATM, and I… don’t take it? Doesn’t money make me happy? Bosoms, Yabbos, Gazongas, Lunalesca. On more than one occasion… Braxton found his happiness cuddling with hers during movies. Sigh. Only I’m never happy. I couldn’t tell you what I am today, Lunalesca, besides exhausted. Only those fur baby books tell me our children would want us to be happy, to get those wins and victories. A W, V, Braxton

958 Days Without B III, Day 399 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 071 ~Sins To B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Is It a Crime to be blunt, brokenhearted, and a bit…? It’d be a sin to lie in bed all day and listen to Sade. Should have done that on E-Day. With this week, what “bad” things have I done already. E-Day. I was born; that’s enough. “Sins To B, Virgil”

Sunday, September 10, 2023

Tale 071 ~Sins To B, Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now… which means I can hurt people as I sleep. Huh! Something we have in common. You hurt.

Keeping in mind that spirit of “Eff the critic.” You woke up around 6:30 a.m., and aren’t you ashamed? Anyway, here you are already wishing that you didn’t. There’s so much to do. And even if you got back into that “Waking Up at 4:00 a.m. Every Day Will Change Your Life” mentality… Hell! What would you be doing with that kind of time, hmm? You’re looking at a whole other year now, days after E-Day. And what have you done that’s worth talking about? Last night, as I listened to a sleep meditation. And that’s another thing. To go from motivation to meditation. Either way, you’ll end up dead. Please! If you’re going to die anyway, do it expeditiously. But no. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Losing a Pet: Coping with the death of your beloved animal
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VERY “Lucky” Surviving This Thirty-Ninth E-Day, Welcome To Level 39
    Completed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 037 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 044 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

But as I was saying. Saturday, I’m lying there late for bed… Do you look healthy, wealthy, or wise? Anyway, besides my “pretend that we’re dead” shtick. I imagined it was Braxton lying beside me and not Virgil. The only reason he didn’t find himself on the foot of the bed. Now, ain’t that a sin? You were thirty-six when Braxton died —and being thirty-nine? Should we bring up the fact that you still watch cartoons? Oh! Not those kinds. I started talking to Dear Future Wife yesterday. I mentioned Himawari wa Yoru ni Saku. You’ll inevitably waste time on that and other things. You remember your crimes. The sins I planned on committing last week had me researching USDT. Not doing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising (OR) Any Other Title
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 044 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

You would be better served listing the sins you’ll commit this week. You’d win. Braxton? You’ll cry over him. You did that first thing. Your firstborn, you failed to save! Then there’s the lying, which you did right now. Before your sadness came… uh, boobs. There was a time when you did pay for one of those apps not to look at them, but then… And yes, you should save all your confessions for Inspector Echo, but sins are fast. Sometime today, you’ll either look up how to commit a crime or shell out dollars. Cryptocurrency, but what’s that make three? You’ll waste more time. Then, sleep too much. You might not say Virgil’s name all day. New week? Routinely wasted… Sins To B, Virgil

952 Days Without B III, Day 393 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 070 ~Virgil, BIII Of E-Day~

WillLeave a comment

Any day B III got more than his fair share, he considered it a holiday. Birthdays? His own, and then E-Day. I didn’t share with VV… Red Lobster forgot the fries “twice.” And the steak. It’s not the only reason I want to vomit. “Virgil, BIII Of E-Day”

Saturday, September 9, 2023

Tale 070 ~Virgil, BIII Of E-Day~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Which means I would be “partying” this month. To be honest. I just want to vomit.

Didn’t I say yesterday that I’m pretty sober? Unless you count sugar as substance abuse. I don’t know if I’ve been crashing. The “Adrenaline” is wearing off. Or depression’s back. I survived E-Day. But that means I have another year of existence to waste. Vomiting? Yep, Luna, TMI! But I’ve said out loud that I killed my son, too. Can B III see me now? Lunalesca, I hope not. But for the record, I’m sitting in bed talking to you. Talk about existence goals. I want to be in bed with a big set of boo… I’m not trying to be derogatory towards women. My critic would have a field day or say nothing at all. There is no middle ground. Anyway, sitting with Braxton…

I’d lie in bed all the time. And after napping for far too long, I’d spill my guts. Not literally. It depends on how you take these words. I wish I could tell you, but (censorship). Anyway, back to my point. Anything else requires me to face the “Man in the Mirror.” Lunalesca, the E in Existence. I swear if my critic doesn’t talk to me today… Emergence is what I regret the most. Extinction is what I yearn for. But Existence? And it’s been two days. What have I done with them? I’ve done the Math. E-Day takes plenty of arithmetic. The money I didn’t spend on “The Pic Phenomenon.” The cash wasted on “my” dinner. And let’s not forget time. THEY say, “Time Is Money.” Thirty-nine years, Lunalesca!

Let me spend more time answering my critic’s question. Hopefully… What’s E-Day? E-Day is the day on which… Well, as Shakespeare put it. From my mother’s womb, I was untimely ripped. It’s the day I came into this world kicking and screaming. And look at me now. Can’t you see Lady Lunalesca? It’s why I find women distracting, love B’s eyes and avoid mirrors. Didn’t I mention I’m reading about vampires now? What are the rules for them again? The rules for E-Day are getting a good night’s sleep, not seeing people, and having a delicious dinner. And I broke every single one this week. And I’m glad it’s over, but now there’s more time. What does that mean for Virgil? Virgil, BIII Of E-Day

951 Days Without B III, Day 392 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 064 ~Braxton and V Security~

WillLeave a comment

There is no safe place, only safer. But when B was here. That’s when I was safe. B at the corner of the bed, staring through the bedroom door. But he can’t protect me from the next two weeks. Better to focus on E-Day for now. “Braxton and V Security”

Sunday, September 3, 2023

Tale 064 ~Braxton and V Security~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now… and you, ha, and you. You’re a worrywart at best. And a dead man at worst. Thirty-nine.

Now, that is the truth. Who knows? You could get lucky, considering the Day Job. Accidents, people’s general animosity, your anxiety… Hell! You’ll take anything at this point. I mean, have you seen the schedule? If this week doesn’t end in… I don’t know. Hmm. Or rather, you don’t. It’s still pretty early. And at the same time, you should have been up before now. It’s not like your critic cares for words like “Security Guard.” Now, say that in Japanese and see what comes up. Anyway, you’ve been wasting time. And now V. A week like this and B wouldn’t understand what’s happening either. He’d just be eating better. That’s all E-Day meant to him. Not Emergence, Existence, Extinction. Like these Six Impossible Things.

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING When Pets Pass Away: A Helpful Guide to… by Emily McQuinn
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 030 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 037 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

They didn’t mean anything to me. And they won’t to you either. Except you will be changing number two for this week. You should alter number five since you have no money. But one, what have you been doing all this morning? Yeah, it hasn’t been to do anything with Braxton’s photo albums. Again, “Security Guard.” And two, with all these goals, at the end of the day, it always comes back to survival, existence, and breathing. Those days, Braxton would sit on the corner of the bed guarding the bedroom door. After a while, he would come back to check on me, then back to the door. I was his purpose. Today, you have Virgil and two bad weeks in coming. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Losing a Pet: Coping with the death of your beloved animal
  2. I WILL BE VERY “Lucky” Surviving This Thirty-Ninth E-Day, Welcome To Level 39
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 037 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Your focus, though, should be on getting through this first week. What were you expecting, some sort of earth-shattering idea? I came up with nothing. Uh, don’t touch it? That was the focus of my time. Pretty much. Well, there was being broke, bald, and, of course, the backyard. And Braxton, always Braxton. The two worst days in existence. They both begin with B’s —Braxton’s Death and Your Birth that has become (sigh) E-Day. Virgil has been a bit cuddly, but here’s doing that for him, not you. But V is a child. As a parent, you’re supposed to be here for him, not vice versa. Only Braxton was a brother, a bruiser. He knew security was more than Japanese animation. Braxton and V Security

945 Days Without B III, Day 386 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 063 ~ Braxton’s Cashing Out, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I go back and forth with what Braxton thought in his final moments. The most “comforting” being something like, “Daddy, why can’t I stay.” And three years later, his Dad is playing with his existence. Losing money on E-Day. Braxton’s Cashing Out

Saturday, September 2, 2023

Tale 063 ~ Braxton’s Cashing Out, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… But how long can I keep saying that? When I’m existing like the Tiger King… Lunalesca

“I am never gonna financially recover from this.” When B III died, it didn’t matter. Lunalesca, I should have followed him. Point blank, period. That is us, Lunalesca, always and forever. We ride together, we die together. What’s one more broken promise, I ask, Lu? I’m becoming a member of the GOP. I waste cash on some horrible investments, ha. I bribe a “poor black child” with a 40oz and a bucket of chicken on his way to the poor house. Oh! Should it be video games and movies? On this coming E-Day, Dear Lunalesca? Hell! It’s not like I have money for anything else. Did I mention I’m becoming a Republican? Or, as they say, I am a “Real American” by hating foreign countries.

England, if we’re being specific. Sorry, Cherry. That money is a drop in the bucket. Compared to what I spent with the Japanese and Russians. I’m spending money on good? Uh! Why does anyone use money on Bitcoin, temporary emails, and a spanking new VPN? Speaking of spanking, I’ve got two things there. The first is Spankbang by way of X/Twitter. It’s always decent for some Japanese “anime,” if you know what I mean, Luna. Second, my almost thirty-nine behind will get spanked by the Olds, Lunalesca. I don’t know. These are confessions better left to Inspector Echo, hmm? But considering what I spent to keep this place afloat… I was going to call myself a piece of… whatever. But I hate toilet humor, literally.

And with that nasty chicken, I spent money on. And how sick I made myself sitting in the car, seeing how much money I lost in a single day. Once upon a time, it was steak and lobster with some fries for B. This year… the Hell if I know for Virgil and I, Lady Lu. Please! I have all the paperwork I was going over last night when I wanted to curse out GoDaddy. Ain’t that a word or words? Go Daddy? I hear those words from Braxton. Only go where my son? He had his Aunt’s ample cleavage, but he couldn’t stay. I don’t want to either, considering old money, criminal offenses, and the Olds. Sin City? Nope! Hell! Braxton’s Cashing Out, Virgil

944 Days Without B III, Day 385 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 057 ~Honey, B, Broke Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I’m not a philosopher or a scientist. I’ve heard the world can end if a butterfly flaps its wings. Or if the bees die off. But if a panel falls off the fence, my best friend dies, or I get a year older. I swear, Honey, B, Broke Virgil.

Sunday, August 27, 2023

Tale 057 ~Honey, B, Broke Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now… This means what happened yesterday, always, and in a week, and some change shouldn’t bother you. But…

Braxton? Always and forever? I swear, he would have liked how much… “Pride,” ha. Nope! That’s the wrong word. What’s the only reason you’ll work in the backyard? Like I did; now say it with me. FEAR! Humiliations Galore, when it comes to the neighbors. Or when it comes to keeping V safe. He ain’t your son, but he is your responsibility. Ain’t that right? Responsibility? Your Olds would get a kick out of that, but you’ll get there today. Yesterday, what the Hell happened? What had you having nightmares and up at 4 a.m.? Well… I was working in the backyard and got the back gate cleared… But one of the wood panels fell off. Your existence… making things worse like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Backyard Dungeon: A Reverse Portal Fantasy
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 023 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 030 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Yep, I almost crapped my pants… eww! And somehow, you’ve kept your pants… for now. A few Instagram models and some minutes spent on X/Twitter. To spend money on some girl. And today, you’ll have to get out of bed and buy Virgil some food. Yeah, that’s my fault. Too busy thinking about the funds you’ll need for E-Day. Well, future you anyway. And didn’t you say that’s coming soon enough? Unlike some “adult fun.” There’s always time for that. It’s like freaking drug addiction. The earth without the bees. Everything falls apart. Well, for you. It was one particular B —better Braxton than women. Or at least it’s been 30 days. And how many Yabbos have I seen? Better focus on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING When Pets Pass Away: A Helpful Guide to… by Emily McQuinn
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 030 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Only you won’t because of one word. Okay, four in particular… E-Day. Emergence, Existence, Extinction. My advice to you… Evolve. I’m sure your Olds would like that. But isn’t it far too late? You’ll be thirty-nine, as you know. One more week and some days. And again, how much will you need to “Celebrate?” If the Olds don’t call, perhaps. Braxton’s Aunt won’t text. It’s not like you’ll see M Anime’s Yabbos. Cherry won’t know. And paying for some Honey? What is this, the 90’s? It would have been much better if you hadn’t made it this far. You wouldn’t continue grieving for Braxton. And Virgil would be Safe and Sound elsewhere. Instead of with a lustful, lacking loser like you. Honey, B, Broke Virgil.

938 Days Without B III, Day 379 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 056 ~We’ll B Positive Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

B III hasn’t reached the Bob Marley section in his musical selections with me. For example, Three Little Birds. But I’m positive I dreamed about him being a seagull and eating one of my books. Positive energy, sigh. We’ll B Positive Virgil.

Saturday, August 26, 2023

Tale 056 ~We’ll B Positive Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Am I positive, Lunalesca? How many days I’ve been eating chicken? I’m losin’ my finger-lickin’ mind.

That’s from the movie “I Think I Love My Wife,” by the way. Ah, movie nights! Me, Braxton, and his Aunt Carolina. It wasn’t happiness. But a step-down or two. It’s not better than “Relations,” but better than sleeping —anything regarding staying on my behind. Only I read something yesterday that I can’t find today. If you want to know why I’m talking to you late, Lunalesca. It’s 6:50 in the morning. Well… Besides watching an old movie, I made of myself with my clothes off. I’ve been looking for this quote on energy. Something about love is energy and how it changes shape and never dies, dear Lunalesca. It makes me wanna cry… DIE.

Which, of course, is all I’ve been thinking about this past week. And with one week to go until E-Day… Emergence, Existence, Extinction. I don’t have the energy, Lunalesca, OK. You know what gives me energy? Relations… or rather solo Relations at this point, Luna. What was I doing yesterday? What made me feel good about myself? The Pic Phenomenon? As the song goes, “Oh God, I’m gonna die alone!” Only Braxton didn’t. He had me. But I didn’t follow him now, did I? Hell! I was too revved up fighting for his life, Lunalesca —the FEAR of losing him and the failure at doing so. FEAR more than anything else, Lunalesca. But it burns me out fast. It keeps me hiding underneath these covers. Chicken dinners, Virgil the dog, and Depression aren’t helping, Lunalesca.

Neither with the energy or positivity. No. With everything on the brain, my blood type… The things I can’t tell you, Lunalesca. Stuff and Thangs, I couldn’t tell Braxton, “Alright.” “We gon’ be alright. Do you hear me? Do you feel me? We gon’ be alright.” Wow, that song was out before he died. Not that it would have made a difference. Like the Almighty. And no, Lunalesca, I don’t mean the wrestler. Watching wrestling is perhaps one of the few positive things I do. If you call it watching and with everything… Windham’s death. The only things I’m positive about. The Thirty-Eighth E-Day will be the worst one ever. I miss my boy Braxton. And I’m still breathing. I’m alive. We’ll B Positive Virgil

937 Days Without B III, Day 378 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will