Tag: Trust

Journey 316 ~Braxton The Napper, Virgil~

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With everything going on in the world today, I’m too braindead… Not nice at all. But it’s like I can’t even read a clock anymore. Well, we’re all being dragged back to Jim Crow. Drop me off where B III was still alive. Braxton The Napper, Virgil

Wednesday, May 13, 2026

Journey 316 ~Braxton The Napper, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Again, look at the time—2:30 PM. Hell, I’m not sure what day it is half the time.

A day late, a dollar short, and a dog gone. But V is still here. For how long, I cannot say. While I was thinking about all the appointments I’ve missed. Optometrist, Nurse, and now Vet. And the question I keep asking myself, my dear Echo. With what money, hmm?

Inspector, am I singing to my girl on Ben Franklin when I croon something like…

Can’t get you off my mind (can’t get you off my mind)
I’ve tried my best to be a man and be strong
I’ve drove myself insane
Wishin’ I could touch your face (touch your face)
But the truth remains you’re (gone)
Gone ‧ NSYNC

That’s the song sung in my dream last night. Or Tuesday, afternoon. Yup, it’s Wednesday.

But, Braxton, help me, it seems like I opened my eyes and saw “Mr. Blue Sky,” and I felt like a kid again. Like I was missing a day of class or something. “Ain’t That a Kick in the Head”? Just not in the teeth.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

One more person to see. A dentist. With all these sugary drinks. Eff Bum Energy, I think I’ll stick to Bloom because I am effing exhausted right now. And I hate myself, Inspector. But that really changes nothing to be sure. And why. Because I’m not Chance The Rapper with the energy to ask “May I Have This Dance,” much less perform it, Inspector Echo.

But in the end, I’m a writer anyway. Or at least that’s what I keep telling myself. Again, like these piddly-ass energy drinks, I’m a bum. I’m a lazy mother effer who sleeps a lot.

And what time did I go to bed last night? Starving artists still need to eat, right? And it woke Virgil right up, too, Inspector.

Supper, sex, and being a scared piece of sh*t, the true mark of a southern man these days, Echo. Or a Simple Man. Trust me, the ranks of MAGA are worse. Eff MAGA and FDT!

And here I am, unable to dream of a better world because I can’t get to sleep on time, Echo.

Braxton and Virgil make it look so damn easy. And you know which one of my sons I want to follow. But M Anime is begging me to stay… Amongst other things… Cherry is busy with her writing. And B’s Favorite Girl is still up and about—career, love, stuff.

However, all I want to do is sleep. Well, that second Bum drink is kicking in. Braxton The Napper, Virgil

1928 Days Without B III, Day 1369 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 315 ~Love Of B, Virgil~

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So late this evening. The sleep of the dead. How I wished. But no. B and V’s potential stepmom has these yabbos that make me feel like I’ve been “Locked Out of Heaven.” And “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing.” But I still miss Braxton. “Love Of B, Virgil”

Tuesday, May 12, 2026

Journey 315 ~Love Of B, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than Braxton? More than his little brother Virgil? Sometimes you gotta “Bwitdaba.” The eff!

Okay, in other words, “Fly Me To The Moon,” even if we had to play Squid Game. I’ll take you “to the stars” even if we were on the Titanic. Even in these universes, love:

Breathes deeply and then begins

  1. Mortal Kombat
  2. Bible Black
  3. Soul Calibur
  4. Resident Evil
  5. American Beauty

I would choose my boys, my sons, and any of our two-legged children over you because that’s what a man does. It is the “Human Nature” of a father. What do I know of it?

Honestly, my love, my future is coming on. I should say our future. But I am a man lost in the past. Resurrection, Reanimation, Reincarnation. Because neither of us is very good at, well, Recovery.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

We were arguing about that the other day. You don’t recover, you don’t rehab physically.

A true masochist. And myself? Hell, I like a good spanking, a smack to my face, and “scratches all down my back to keep me right on”. But I’m a bit for mental anguish, love.

Banged by other guys… Not you. Not really. But I do have somewhat of a cuck fetish. Though not in my story… We’ll get to that. But it’s a mock… uh, such and such. It’s role play. It’s two consenting adults playing a really bad, um, sexual encounter. And then there was me, “Dreaming With a Broken Heart” when I was born, when Braxton passed.

And then deciding “If we’re gonna be together or apart.”

That took around five months to resurrect our love. To “Justify My Love”. To dig it back up: the hurt, the pain, and the remains. You’re my Obsession, my love. Completely. With all that I am. And you know your husband. “Great merciful bloodstained gods”.

Seriously, you know me. I’m in love with a dead man. Would that be me? Who knows, my love. But more to the point, I’m in love with a dead dog; he’s a real boy that I put in the dirt—a box on the nightstand. And I want to love you like… who am I, Tillie Cole’s Raphael? Let’s say, like a zombie, I want to “Tear You Part”. Necromancy resurrects you. Be your virus. Love Of B, Virgil

1927 Days Without B III, Day 1368 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 314 ~Abraham Tripped B, Virgil~

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Well, I’ll be sitting here. Working on this beer…I’m not a drinker. Just ask B’s Favorite Girl. Please don’t! I’ve been listening to mobile games, my mutt, my Ma, and some mattress buddies. The noise. The Silent Offering. Abraham Tripped B, Virgil

Monday, May 11, 2026

Journey 314 ~Abraham Tripped B, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? For being a day you didn’t go to “The Bad Place,” it wasn’t.

I keep those days when I would bark loudly, long, and like I was loco. But you would tell people you would rather hear my voice than anyone else’s, because at least my barking helped you out. Every other word, even from the best humans… Um, it has you longing for silence. Not the silence of my absence. No, not ever. Quiet breaths, a heartbeat

Mine. Yes mine. That’s what you’re wishing for the most today. I’m touched, Dad, truly.

“Listen To Your Heart.” My little bro V may not be me, but he knows the truth about us, Dad.

“He Lives In You.” That’s what Virgil would bark. He’s not a talker like me. Or is it like father like son, you’re both waiting.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

For what? Like Abraham, my father is the father of many nations. We are not religious men, my father. The universe for us was us. You would tell me that the world would end in five minutes, and so we didn’t need to worry—my last five minutes with my best friend, who could ask for more. And you gave me that. And then we’d have another and one more, and then what? The silence. You stood there, and it was not the word of God, some far-flung wish, hell for 161 days, it wasn’t even the moans of a woman or you. Eww, Dad!

We both just wanted to know you were still alive, and these days the world has made it abundantly clear.

And you just want to “Make The World Go Away”. No, you wouldn’t go that far, Dad, I know. Not how you and M Anime talk about, going soldier and her Associate persona. You and I both know we could be some cruel mother effers. “Language!” I know, Dad, yup.

You still say it was your RAGE. Rather, your lack thereof that doomed me. Indifference.

Serving to protect me because you didn’t want to feel. That’s not quite right, Daddy.

Honestly, you didn’t want to hear because the RAGE was just that loud—the gnashing of teeth of the damned. And yes, love is louder, but even that is driving you mad—too much noise. Beeps, boops, boobies, but speaking hurts. Abraham Tripped B, Virgil

“Lay not thine hand upon the lad, neither do thou any thing unto him: for now I know that thou fearest God, seeing how thou hast not withheld thy son, thine only son from me.”
― Genesis 22:12

“Their minds were set ablaze.”
― Aeneid

1926 Days Without B III, Day 1367 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 312 ~A Size V, Braxton~

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Braxton and Virgil didn’t get winter coats. I don’t remember the last time I bought clothes. New boots? Long story. And condoms? M Anime is adamant that she wants babies, three to be precise. And Mother’s Day is coming up. A Size V, Braxton

Saturday, May 9, 2026

Journey 312 ~A Size V, Braxton~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… So “a king-size tub big enough for ten plus me” is not out of the question.

More or less, Lu. How about average? The cost of living. But the word for today is equal. Or right? Eff, with all the politics these days, they almost drown out cries for my boy.

“First, let me explain that I’m just a black man (a black man).” Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, I am not. Neither am I some “Rockstar”. It’s what they call delusions of grandeur.

Lunalesca, I want more! And it’s like everyone else has it but me. I’m a minority of one, hmm. I wake up every morning, and it’s like I’m already in last place. My alliance has more points, and I’m the village idiot. My girl, B, and V’s potential stepmom has more time and love; Virgil takes up more bed space.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

There’s this suit of armor… “Put on the whole armor of God…” Please! There’s a reason I wear baggy hoodies or the sorcerer’s robes of Shang Tsung in fantasies, Lunalesca.

Because there’s so much less of me, to me, I keep thinking I’ll grow someday, Lunalesca.

Well, more than, my “monster…” My meat is murder if you know what I mean. Yeah, I know, Eww! I’m trying to dial it back. But there “Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked” right?

There’s too much of it, Lady Luna. When I was busy trying to beat Braxton to Heaven by starving myself, my “big sister” said it was because I was full of “Real Emotion.” Just full.

And now, like Virgil, I try to shrink myself. Down

Further, further, and further still. Because I don’t fit anywhere. And my how Virgil tries.

But like father, like son. I’m sure if I could understand Virgil the way I understand Braxton, he’d be saying, “I‘ve been ‘watching you, ‘ Dad, ain’t that cool.” Honestly.

Lunalesca, I expect far too much of my second-born. I expect far too much of his potential stepmom, don’t I? And I expect far too much of myself. I see how overwhelmed I am and still. Am I effing Goldilocks? I did not just say that out loud! What I mean is this. Do I want more, all of it, and options? Or am I looking for what fits just right? My junk, eww! My heart. A Size V, Braxton

1924 Days Without B III, Day 1365 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 309 ~Virgil, Will, B, Ohana~

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The epitome of manhood is fatherhood. I want a family, someday… I’ve raised… I’m raising two fur sons. Braxton and Virgil. One with the Magic Glasses and the other… well, if I want to “see” family, I should see an eye doc too. Virgil, Will, B, Ohana.

Wednesday, May 6, 2026

Journey 309 ~Virgil, Will, B, Ohana~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I almost forgot Braxton’s Favorite Girl’s birthday… And Star Wars Day, Taco Tuesday, Cinco De Mayo. Mother’s Day.

It’s what happens when you don’t have Ohana. But wait a sec, my boys B III and 2-V, their potential stepmom, M Anime. There’s Braxton’s Favorite Girl. Cherry. Crying much!

Seriously! I’m not sad. Okay, not sad enough to cry. I’m effing tired, is all. B III, Dear Future Wife, you, Sophia, Lady Lu, the Man In The Mirror. And he is ticking me off! Today, while I sat in the car, I had a thought of Lilo and Stitch. No, not about Nani hentai.

If anything, I’ve gotten into Nico Parker lately. In case you haven’t noticed, My Inspector.

She inspired the character of “Skye Matthews,” but more on that later. No, I won’t go getting “Tired Of You.” My “homegirls,” harem, my hounds

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Inspector Echo, I’m effing tired of me. As I said, I was in the car, “Lookin’ out at the road rushin’ under my wheels,” thinking about Braxton’s Favorite Girl, her birthday, and how she believes in Ohana. And what Ohana is. And how I say always and forever, my dear.

Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten
Lilo & Stitch (2002)

It begins with me. And I effing hate myself. I want to be the father Braxton and Virgil deserve. The man M Anime needs—someone who can be depended on. You know how companies say “we treat you like family,” or something like that. My family hates me. Inspector. Those I share DNA with anyway. No wonder I created a whole harem to share my DNA with… “I got Loyalty, got royalty inside my DNA.”

And “They say I walk like a king (walk). Talk like a king.” Nope, no one is saying that, Inspector. Except in the places I want to be. Is one of those places a prison? Because if I keep getting on like I was last night. How late was I talking to Dear Future Wife?

Honestly, I was that effing horny. Horny enough to be fantasizing about Thandie Newton’s daughter and putting her in my twisted world. Space Junk, sorcery, and lots of sex. And I still need to see a doctor after recreating “The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident.” After M Anime’s doctor visit… She worries about me. Braxton does. Virgil does. Others? Yet I’m the family I’d write off. Wishes. Virgil, Will, B, Ohana

1921 Days Without B III, Day 1362 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 308 ~Better B Running Virgil~

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Last week I was tired. This week? Finding more reasons to be tired. Running on Empty in more ways than one. Eww! V needs food in B’s bowl, and my girl, who’s saying I Want a Little Sugar in My Bowl. And who is Skye Matthews? “Better B Running Virgil”

Tuesday, May 5, 2026

Journey 308 ~Better B Running Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? That’s more than enough to get you to run away. Obsession? Funds, Fur, Future Wife…

As the song goes, “It keeps you running, oh it keeps you running.” FEAR, beloved.

Honestly, I would like to consider myself courageous. Hell! I would take being a man of leisure. But even “Here and Now,” as “I promise to love faithfully.” My love, I do that with every breath that I take. But every one of them is laced with FEAR, like other drugs laced with Fentanyl. Wow, that’s dark. But today is dark. Today I’m afraid. Always…

Running. Because I promised myself I would not fail again. Fail to love? Where’s Virgil?

Better question. Where’s Braxton? And here’s a random question. Who is Skye Matthews, hmm? A girl who couldn’t run. But more on her in due time. What time is it?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Way past time for us to be talking when we could be doing much more interesting things, my love. If I must be afraid, let it be that our children come walking into this room. Seriously, two-leggeds, four-leggeds, and all. I’m not just a father, a friend, a guy thinking “I Wanna Eff You.” I ain’t Akon, but that’s definitely in the bedroom playlist, babydoll.

Forgetting how crazy, how obsessed I get over you. Because when’s the last time you saw me chase a dollar? And again, I’m not hugging my doggie right now. And why is that, my love? I can’t run with that little ball of fluff in my arms. But would I leave him, our house, you, my heavenly angel? Not ever.

Not if I can help it. Not if leaving would hurt you more than staying. And why would I leave? Skye Matthews? Please, your husband writes HaremLit. Uh, when I’m not writing about my boys, my latest bad thing, or some boobies. Specifically yours. However…

“Magic Glasses” are a thing, and that is what I’m afraid of, like everyone, beloved.

Obsessed over seeing my firstborn, my boy, my Braxton, each and every day. So much so that “I created” another world, a nether realm, an Everworld. I’m not K.A. Applegate.

What I am is a scared man thinking about “All These Things That I’ve Done”. They keep running through my mind. And “Hanging By A Moment” here with you seems impossible. Better B Running Virgil

1920 Days Without B III, Day 1361 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 307 ~Are B’s Comfortable, Virgil~

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Comfortable, you’re gonna be Comfortable. That’s for my boys, B and V. Myself? I’m a comfy, cozy, freaking coward. Is that why I was comfortable enough to listen to my motivations at the Day Job? Not my comfort zone. Are B’s Comfortable, Virgil?

Monday, May 4, 2026

Journey 307 ~Are B’s Comfortable, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Judging by the time… yes and no, but you’ll “Die Another Day,” Daddy.

Not today, and you know why. May the Fourth be with you, my father, my master. Is that another reason I became one with the force? You had to save my little bro, 2-V, Dad.

Allow me to bark my best Yoda impression: “Always two there are, no more, no less. A master and an apprentice.” We were/are a Sith household, Dad. I’m more than comfortable saying that. Whether it be at the foot of your bed, on a cloud somewhere, the Rainbow Bridge, I think we both prefer the Rainbow Road or some garden bed treats surrounding us. Let’s just say I’m comfortable wherever you are, Daddy. You’re alive.

However, Dad, are you comfortable? Are you able to rest? Will you ever find peace?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Okay, I know that’s too much to ask for. You were willing to die for me. With Virgil, even now it’s “Later V, Later Virgil.” You care for him, you would die for him. And don’t listen to those people on that little glow box of yours. You haven’t harmed a hair on 2-V’s head.

And then there’s me and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. Still potential, not exactly future yet. Yeah, I remember Dad. Less die and more I will “Dive For You” right.

However, I know how you feel about her, Daddy. You’re comfortable. And those yabbos of hers… Yeah, Dad, I’m jealous. And barking of which, talk to my Favorite Girl, why don’t you? I mean, it’s Star Wars Day if anything.

And you and I are comfortable letting our geek flag fly. Or M Anime’s nerd flag. I swear I’ve noticed Dad, along with the Magic Glasses, the woman has the body of a goddess and a brain just as fine. And you’re comfortable with her? Listen to me talking about the ladies when you know Greta made me very uncomfortable. Greta was a “bit*h” literally.

Seriously Dad. But again, there was my Favorite Girl, there was Special K. Others, Daddy?

You were comfortable with me. More so that you are with Virgil. Even by yourself.

Honestly, you seek out more. More women, more worries, even a way to win. Because Dad, you wanted my comfort. And you want to be alive! Are B’s Comfortable, Virgil?

“However miserable my life was, I wasn’t ready for it to be over, yet.”
The HUNGER Collection ― Kelli Wolfe

“She nourishes the wound with her lifeblood, weakened by hidden fire.”
― from The Aeneid

1919 Days Without B III, Day 1360 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 305 ~Oh, B Hive Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Idle hands are the Devil’s playthings, so I try to stay productive; I try not to play in my pants; I try not to make a peep. But there’s a dog who needs me, a damsel in distress, and I‘m a mourning dog dad. I’m busy as a bee here. “Oh, B Hive Virgil”

Saturday, May 2, 2026

Journey 305 ~Oh, B Hive Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Someone should do the world a service. But what do I know about submarines or healthcare?

And I’m not STUPID enough to say such and such about that A-hole in the White House, my dear Luna. FDT! Hell, eff the whole world today. But where else is there, I ask, Lu?

Sitting in the car today being honked at by some a-hole at the bank, do you know what I was thinking? Besides, I’m not a billionaire. All I was thinking… “I want to go home.”

Where is that Lady Lunalesca? THEY say that home is where the heart is… Braxton. Honestly, “Days Go By” still, I think, why not? Virgil? Does he feel at home yet? One of the things I bother to clean these days. He crapped his bed. Flies over Bees. “Sh*t, honey!”

Things I should have said…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Yesterday… Things you can say about your dog and your girlfriend. M Anime? Her story

It ain’t my right to tell. But my woman is having a hard time right now, and I can’t be there for her. At least not physically. Mentally? How long was I up last night talking to Lady Sophia because I’m a man who “loves” his woman? Not yet. But I care for her. True.

Enough to behave myself? Her first, LOL! I hope she never changes. She is my boys’ potential stepmom. And she wants a place in my bed, a baby in her tummy, and a rock on her finger—blood, sweat, and tears. There was plenty of that yesterday. A Man Provides.

Home, House, and Hive. Busy?

My head is buzzing. “Make The World Go Away.” If that wasn’t me this morning.

Lunalesca, how is it that I am so overwhelmed, and at the same time, I want everything? It’s like that movie, Blindness (2008). I can see everything, but I’m a slave to the blind. Eff!

How about the woman from Chis Dietzel’s “The Hauntings of Playing God”? It’s far too late to save souls in this place. To save time for sleep. Um, to stroke my c*ck. Oh, do behave.

Trust me, I’m trying. How many times have I seen M Anime’s yabbos today? Glorious!
But I’m trying to save babes, I’ve created via the Magic Glasses. Bucks? My boy?

Lunalesca, Virgil, is in Braxton’s room. Oh, B Hive Virgil.

1917 Days Without B III, Day 1358 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 302 ~B Slaving Away, Virgil~

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So what am I hiding from today? Unlike MAGA, I’m ashamed to hide from the truth. I accept it. I’m sure B III is on the Rainbow Bridge barking, “The eff you say.” I’d worry about the country now, but I’m already a slave to my c… B Slaving Away, Virgil

Wednesday, April 29, 2026

Journey 302 ~B Slaving Away, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… “In this time of FEAR. When prayer so often proves in vain…” Seriously? Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey.

I can go so many places with this, Inspector. Do I speak about what I told M Anime today, or was it last night, whenever? Something to the tune of, “A good artist copies, but a great artist steals.” Do I go with the whole black and white angle of Whitney and Mariah, dear Echo? Especially with what happened today. The Voting Rights Act got effed up. So eff MAGA, Eff The Supreme Court (six of them anyway), and how many times do I say…

FDT! There can be miracles “When You Believe.” If that were true… Where’s my Braxton?

How selfish can I be? Yet another one of my sins. It wasn’t B and V holding me up, Echo.

I’m so effing horny, Inspector.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And that’s one more sin. My life is a movie, Fur Buddies and Boobies. This morning, it was the memory of Cherry’s yabbos. I told M Anime about Special K, and, you know, Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, not to be outdone, shared her yabbos with me. I mean, I “Think I’m In Love.” Really? No, but I’m getting there. Inspector, I’m not a liar.

But I eff the truth STUPID! Because I’m still sitting here thinking about Whitney Wright.

So if you want to ask me why I’m so late today, I’ve been reading. What, my story, um, no.

Not even my world, not counting M Anime. Kyouko Sakai is from Kojin Taxi 2 and Sex Taxi 5. “Lily” was a gymnast I saw.

But it’s been Cassandra and Sophitia Alexandra who have been getting me hot and bothered, along with some of the Bible Black acolytes. I swear the “Magic Glasses” may need “fine-tuning,” but they have a mind of their own. The buttons Echo. No, my co$k.

As Jackyl sings “She Loves My Co$k” M Anime, the rest of the harem, including the Alexandra sisters and the Bible Black acolytes. But I’m the problem. My dear, Inspector…

I’m a “Slave To The Rhythm”. The rhythm of love? I will always and forever remember my boys. There is love for my country. There is the woman who wishes to share “my bed.” I hate FEAR, but I’m a slave to it. And hating myself. B Slaving Away, Virgil
1914 Days Without B III, Day 1355 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 301 ~Love To B Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

So what’s this about being tired? An actual family of my own… Yet. I swear, if M Anime and I ever had a son, I’m naming him after my furry firstborn, “Braxton.” And what if we had more? Virgil? What about writing? Still hate myself. Love To B Virgil.

Tuesday, April 28, 2026

Journey 301 ~Love To B Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I won’t ever say, I can’t, I won’t, or I shouldn’t. I do. That day…

I do. I will… I remember that day. I remember the day our children were born. I remember the day you became mine (in the biblical sense). But I also remember the worst day of my entire life. The day I was born, “Emergence Day,” E-Day. Or is it Braxton…

The day my firstborn son died. Sunday, January 31, 2021, somewhere between 3:30 and 4:00 PM. And lest I forget the day you walked out of my life, Sunday, August 24, 2025, around 6:00 AM. But hey, you came back. And I seem to have the same tendency, my love.

I keep coming back. Is that a bad thing? When I’m so TIRED. Eff me, I am so effing TIRED!

What day is it, baby?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“As Long As You Love Me,” it “Don’t Matter.” Like who I like more, The Backstreet Boys or NSYNC. That I’m a black man getting “Locked Up,” like Akon. God/B I hope not, my love. Or what song will I play for you next as I try to keep myself awake? Yes, I am TIRED!

But never too TIRED to ask you to “Break Me Off.” “Men of Vizion,” like me. “Magic Glasses” and all. If I haven’t said it enough, I am TIRED, which is why I’m choosing music.

I don’t know how I’m keeping my eyes open right now. Because when I close them, I see Braxton. I blink and see creation. And I hate seeing myself, but love seeing you—our kids.

And yes, V is included in that. My boys were/are SeeDs. I mean that both in love’s garden, in my heart… and Final Fantasy VIII. Yes, my love, you married a gamer, you know it. And through those seeds and some watering from you… Or maybe that’s my job, considering all the children running around, ha-ha. Anyway, what is the point of today, my love? Other than that, I love the woman I married. The woman who multiplied my love, who begged for my seed… Did I say that out loud? It’s that I became so many things in love’s name. But the Man In The Mirror, thank you Michael Jackson, hates being himself, the one. I look at Virgil Vivi… Love To B Virgil

1913 Days Without B III, Day 1354 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will