Tag: Distance

Meditation 162 ~Virgil On B’s Downgrade~

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I hope he, she, or they are not like me; I hope they understand. Fatherhood is the epitome of manhood. A man raises his wife and children higher than himself. It worked for B. He got sent to Heaven. Uh, low. But myself. “Virgil On B’s Downgrade”

Tuesday, December 10, 2024

Meditation 162 ~Virgil On B’s Downgrade~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Above myself? Of course. But my love is like hope. I keep none for myself.

Uh, you married a geek. I can only tell you a little about Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, etc. But nevertheless, a geek. I read, and I know things. Game Of Thrones? With all my time off, not counting when you’re reading this, you would think I would catch up with some pop culture. Wrestling, Wickedness, the Wh***dom of my novel. I’m powering down.

Today is Thursday, December 6, 2024. And I am a shell of my former self. Please, haven’t I been this way since I lost my boy, my Braxton? And what about Virgil? He’s so bored.

Sometimes, I wonder if I’m a downgrade from who had Virgil first. Who loved him first? He’s got comfy spots and cool water. So Cheers!

But not for me. Every day, it’s like I have to make myself so much worse. What so you’ll leave. No! Never! Ever! And if losing my firstborn didn’t do that… I still mourn him.

Existence has been forever and always downgraded without Braxton. But it could be worse. I could be Ted Mosby, forever pining away for another woman while I have our family. If a man finds an angel… And I have you, my love. His duty, honor, and privilege is to build her a Heaven. And if a man touches the sky… That’s where Heaven is? Hmm.

A man and woman must show their children the stars. The twinkle in father’s eye.

Seriously? Am I trying to be a somewhat decent writer?

I’d settle for being a decent father and friend and not too effing shabby in the sack as a husband, my love. And that’s the problem. It feels wrong to desire more but then to live with desiring less or not at all. There’s being indifferent. At the same time, if I choose what I want, what does it make me? The guy that let the vet euthanize Braxton. Love?

You know what I wanted to say. What’s a word for censorship, sadness, and disgust all rolled into one? And let’s not forget depravity. Is that why I want to do specific things with you in bed? Because I’m not worthy of an angel. Or a friend like Braxton. But fatherhood? Virgil On B’s Downgrade

1409 Days Without B III, Day 850 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 155 ~To B Humiliated, Virgil~

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During NaNoWriMo, was I ashamed of what I was writing? And now I’m embarrassed that these hands aren’t given the keys to the Day Job when I’ve been there over a decade and my “boss” has been there, um, two years… Oh, To B Humiliated, Virgil

Tuesday, December 3, 2024

Meditation 155 ~To B Humiliated, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But as much as I love my firstborn son? Or how about RELATIONS? Yet Humiliation…

No love, I’m not talking about my being humiliated, “doing the deed.” Don’t get me wrong. I’m into some worrisome, wicked, and WTF kinks and fetishes in the throes of passion. Spanking? Yeah, I have issues. But I’m not talking about any of those. Later…

Dearest, today I’m talking about people. My Dad, ha-ha. My father. Memories of my old Day Job. And the people I meet daily. If I wanted any early Christmas present besides getting my dog/son back. Or the almighty dollar. The destruction of MAGA. Starting with its leader, Donald Trump. I would decide never to be humiliated ever again. Why don’t I try not to wake up in the morning? Today was one of those days, my love. More Humiliations Galore!

It’s why I tend to surround myself with so many beautiful things. Choosing not to be humiliated is like choosing not to breathe. It’s a nice thought, but don’t give me hope that it won’t happen again. I’m already tearing up. But I’m not ashamed to cry. Not for B…

And then play the song “He’s My Son.” Niagara Falls, baby doll. I’m not ashamed that I love Braxton more than my life. Hell! I’m still reading “The Heartache of Pet Loss: Losing Your Best Friend.” And if I ever in a million years would say that what I did was the right thing. It would be purely on the grounds that he didn’t have me shame him. Poor boy.

There was this movie, love…

“Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”
Love Story

Love means never having to be ashamed of being who you are. And I don’t love who I am. And so here I am, embarrassed. But who am I to you? Husband, Hero, a hell-bound best friend. How about a humiliated human being? I’ve been watching a few things all about men who would be heroes if just for one day. Only to end up as influencers, showing what not to do. Crucified. Or locked in the Ministry of Love. Um, 2023’s Share, The Book of Clarence, and 1984. I’m not ashamed to admit wanting Suzanna Hamilton, aka Julia. But to live ashamed of keys, knowledge, and keeping my cowardice. Oh, To B Humiliated, Virgil.

1402 Days Without B III, Day 843 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 148 ~Braxton And Virgil’s Mistakes~

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WARNING: 18+ For elements of the novel I’m writing. If you don’t know what Bible Black is, I’d advise you to go no further. Me, on the other hand… I can do worse. But it’s in the name of providing for my boys. My family… Braxton And Virgil’s Mistakes

Tuesday, November 26, 2024

Meditation 148 ~Braxton And Virgil’s Mistakes~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But boys will be boys… When it comes to Braxton… What Makes A Good Man?

I do! Braxton is a good man. And even Virgil, who was busy crying today, is a better man than me. I hope it was because he was scared of a lizard. Hell! I was terrified, but I protected my son. But how do I protect you and ours from…

Chapter Seventeen: What Goes In Her Body?
Antonio watches as Sofía is violated before taking his revenge and violating Sofía himself. Before Cherry murders him.

  1. From Antonio’s POV. Begin in a mockup of a hospital room. Sofía, in a hospital gown, is forced into sex with three fake doctors.
  2. Antonio, dressed as a patient, watches, remarking on the doctors’ brutality with Sofía. Antonio thinks about how he’s taken William’s place masturbating to Sofía.
  3. The fake doctors are rewarded by using Sofía multiple times as she attempts to fight them. The men are Richard Thornfield’s most loyal bodyguards.
  4. The doctors orgasm multiple times with Sofía. As they finally stop to rest. Antonio orgasms by himself before reaching for the shotgun Cherry bought.
  5. Before the doctors can react, Antonio shoots all three of them and walks over to Sofía. Antonio says no other man will touch her.
  6. Sofía realizes that Antonio is the stalker she was protected from. Sofía blames Antonio for being sexually trafficked since taking Richard Thornfield’s Max-Mart job.
  7. Antonio has sex with Sofía as he admits that all he wanted to do was be with her after all this time. His obsession.
  8. The sex becomes more brutal as Antonio begins to flashback to the first time he saw Sofía. He recounts the times their paths crossed.
  9. Antonio finishes and lies beside Sofía, who is too weak to move after the multiple violations. Sofía begins begging for everything to be over.
  10. Antonio says he can never forgive her, Richard Thornfield, William, or himself. But that Cherry allowed him to have her and see her last.
  11. Antonio uses Sofía’s mouth to pleasure himself and have one more release orgasming on her face. Antonio then pulls a knife to kill Sofía.
  12. Sofía struggles against Antonio’s strength. Before Antonio can stab Sofía, he is shot multiple times by Cherry. Antonio dies watching Cherry rescue Sofía leaving.

I’m a terrible man… sick writer. I’ve no right to mention Braxton And Virgil’s Mistakes.

1395 Days Without B III, Day 836 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 141 ~Virgil, We’ll B Leaving~

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There’s “Stuff & Thangs” I find. Fantasies, Actress names, reasons to cry, complain, or lose cash. But 400 words daily, 146,000 yearly, with 1,168,000 in 8 years. Was one Emergency, Escape, Exit, or Love? “Trump is coming…” “Virgil, We’ll B Leaving.”

Tuesday, November 19, 2024

Meditation 141 ~Virgil, We’ll B Leaving~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? My love for you is deep and unwavering. But the thought of leaving, the uncertainty, and the changes we may face, it’s a lot to bear. And the color blue is a reminder of my…

Balls? Bollocks? I should work on my UK English, considering that with each passing day, the defeat, the ending, and the finale of this grand experiment known as the United States of America draws nigh. For the record, today is Sunday, November 10, 2024. Am I still getting ready for the workday? I should be preparing to move us, love.

When the state of our country does not consume me, I find myself still mourning for my lost boy, Braxton. He was my firstborn, my strength during the first Trump Presidency. Virgil, “our” son, doesn’t have that same resilience. But as a father, I have to protect my family, not vice versa. This truth weighs heavily on me as I prepare for these uncertain times. Every single day… The sickness…

You want sickness. You haven’t even gotten to Tuesday, November 12, 2024, when I showed TeamSkeet Bipartisan B****e starring Melody Parker. That was the tip of the iceberg… My mind…

Businesswise, I’ve gone from what I spoke of last week… Dollification, Tentacles, Netorare/NTR, Voyeurism. There’s been the Midnight Sleazy Train Series. Characters such as Asuka Langley Soryu, Jessie Rasberry, and Jessie from TR. Yuffie Kisaragi has made an appearance. I just saw “Karen” again today, which is vintage anime. Keraku-no-Oh – King of Pleasure. And all that so I can finish my novel for NaNoWriMo. And even with all our money, we need even more. You know the man you married, my love. I mean…

Yasmina Khan and Jewel Staite are on the “reality” side. Even Cherry’s massive melons. Woo!

I say all of this, and why, my love? Because even with who I am and what I do, I respect women. Your body, your choice. But have you heard them since the election? Madness.

It’s madness that a black person’s life can be snuffed out. Speaking of the wrongness…

Land of the free, home of the brave indeed. “A city of justice, a city of love, a city of peace For every one of us,” as the song goes. What about a nation? Somewhere…

“We Gotta Get Out Of This Place.” I have more faith in my furry son’s spirit and/or energy. And the love you and I have, rather than the power that will descend January. Should we go? Virgil, We’ll B Leaving

1388 Days Without B III, Day 829 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 134 ~It’ll B Over Soon~

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Wife, girlfriend? I wanted Braxton to have a stepmom at some point. But he has a few “hot honorary aunts.” But what will become of them? What will become of America after she has been made into a… After this violation. I’m afraid “It’ll B Over Soon.”


Tuesday, November 12, 2024

Meditation 134 ~It’ll B Over Soon~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Can I still feel that? I love you, our children, my firstborn, Ma, Braxton’s aunts.

Virgil Vivi… And surprisingly, I can keep going. My businesses… Hell! My existence is love.

I didn’t just say that out loud? Speaking of things, I never thought I would speak. Trump will be the next president. Still, that’s according to the snippets I’ve gotten. I’ve turned on the TV once today. Wednesday, November 6, 2024. And I turned it right back off. I’ve tried to avoid Facebook, Instagram, X/Twitter except for “The Bare Necessities.” And YouTube is a no-go. I swear the words, “Trump Wins.” I’ve been sick to my stomach all day. And as I told Inspector Echo, it is reminiscent of the day I lost Braxton. Sickening.

I can’t help but draw a parallel between my Braxton’s passing and Trump’s victory. It’s a comparison that leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. It’s like comparing my deepest sorrow to something so distasteful, like my kinks and fetishes.

My beautiful wife, in these times of uncertainty, I find myself longing for your presence, your touch, your understanding. What can a man do in such times? Stand, Speak, Save. But most importantly, love. Somehow

Somehow… Just Survive Somehow, like The Walking Dead. That’s how I feel right now, my love. I’m sapped of everything. So what have I been doing since? Everything is 1984, The Handmaid’s Tale, Fahrenheit 451, Brave New World, and the list goes on, baby doll.

Funny, I call you that. When Braxton passed away… Oh, finally, some tears for Braxton.

Anyway, when he took his trip to The Rainbow Bridge, the world kept turning, love. There was still everything for everyone, but I was alone. And since 4:30 this morning…

Nothingness. I am a man.

A man with nothing to do and nowhere to go. I better use our money to get us out of the country. Yeah! Every penny is precious now. Every democratic politico. And every perversion… My desire for you, the young man I was in 2021, and for Yabbos, my love.

Dollification, Tentacles, Netorare/NTR, Voyeurism. Again, just to name a few things I’ve been researching today. And why baby doll…? Tony Montana was elegant in saying:

“This is paradise, I’m tellin’ ya. This town like a great big py just waiting to get f*d.” (Tony Montana)

That’s how I feel about America this second. And I don’t like it. I really don’t. Nope, not one little bit. The woman’s bored; I’m bored, or worse… A video when I pity the woman. America, my love. We’ll need each other to survive this… Violation. It’ll B Over Soon

“She’s the girl that guys marry, and I’m the girl that guys f***!” (Kill Theory)

1381 Days Without B III, Day 822 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 127 ~Vote For Us B~

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I may not have any two-legged kids running around yet. A childless dog guy. But today, I’m striving to be “Human,” an “Ordinary Human,” and “just a regular, everyday normal mother effer.” So, I’m going to VOTE for Kamala Harris! “Vote For Us B.”

Tuesday, November 5, 2024

Meditation 127 ~Vote For Us B~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And I don’t care who you vote for… Though I see the woman I married.

But being the man you married… It’s days like this that show I’m not the worst. However, if MAGA has its way… How long could I remain in business? “Remember, Remember the fifth of November” (A day of historical significance.) So today, I choose not to stay in this bed. “For The Love of You.”

For the Love of Us. Because I’m not Jesse Watters. And as much as I want to break out the Lee Greenwood soundtrack… My inane, insane, and downright ignorant thoughts…

Well, they don’t involve MAGA in winning today. If you want to know my thoughts…

Somebody “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’” when I go to vote today. Every day is an opportunity to see my son Braxton, who passed away. How many people have read that?

But B resides in the kingdom of Heaven… The Republic? The Rainbow Bridge, my Love.

Only today is “All About You” baby doll. The world I want you to be safe and happy in along with our daughters. I envision a country where our sons will grow up to be men and not whatever MAGA is. “What Makes A Good Man?” “Isn’t It Ironic?” Seriously.

Playlist creation at a time like this. Anyway, what I’m trying to say about good men is this. I can look at myself as a good man for once because of the one I raised, my son Braxton. And I’m much better than those evil ones in the red hats. This is Madness! Or Stupidity! Bear with me, my Love.

THIS IS AMERICA!!! Childish Gambino meets King Leonidas. I swear, “Where Is My Mind” Love? The Last Voter by Chris Dietzel. I should have read that again before today. Instead, I chose Braxton. I’m reading another pet loss book. I need to pay attention today.

At the voting booth? My Love, voting for Kamala Harris is the easiest choice I’ll have to make today. I have a harder time voting for who has the best Yabbos ever morning… Just Kidding… those would be yours, my Love. And as much of a businessman as I am. I mind my business, which is you and our family. Effing MAGA has no place.

Democracy will win ‘Cause I believe that Love is the answer.” Vote For Us B

1374 Days Without B III, Day 815 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 120 ~They’ll B Time Virgil~

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Everything can wait. But love can’t tell time. How long was I sitting on the bench waiting for the news that my son was dying? How long was I at the altar waiting to leave my father and mother and be joined with a wife? I’m 40. They’ll B Time Virgil.

Tuesday, October 29, 2024

Meditation 120 ~They’ll B Time Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Not enough to forget Braxton. You’d never ask that. But enough to love myself. Hehe

What a way to start the day, huh? Honestly, the day should have started at 4:00 AM this Friday, October 25, 2024. 3:00 AM? I can only be me, not Eric Thomas, my love. And when did I last listen to one of his motivational speeches? Or hear the voice, the bark of my Braxton.

All I hear these days is the ticking of the clock and my grumbling. Moaning…

Honestly, I wish they were yours. Must everything be “stuff & thangs?” My raison d’être.

For the longest time, I felt that was to be B’s Dad. To have a family. He will always be. Only there’s you, our children. Hopefully, my Ma. What about Virgil and my sister, too?

Not that I make time.

That’s what’s bothering me today… More than my B III being gone? More than my next breath? More than my birth… Emergence Day? And how about the next pair of breas… um, Yabbos that wants a job. There’s never enough time for pain, pleasure, personhood…

And why am I so pressed for time? Nowadays, I could say politics. Constitution, Freedom. And all of the buzzwords that are being thrown. But there’s always time to say that I love you. And it could be another lesson from Braxton. If I gave him all my love, what was left for me? Or did he know I had love to share, and now that he’s gone, I can and should? Even at forty…

Is there time for me to learn how to love? I don’t write love stories. But writing is my first love. Or so it was. Now, when I look at my schedule. It could be even worse. If you knew what my old Day Job calendar looked like. The way I would get sick. In Hell, my love, there’s enough time for weeping and gnashing of teeth. So, is that why I’m still alive? Nope

I tell myself it’s to keep Braxton alive. I would do anything for him. And that’s why I stay so busy. Or I’m sleeping. But haven’t I been taking energy shots lately? Or rising for…

Jewel Staite

More Yabbos or anything close. Love, let’s be in our bunk. And afterward, with this existence. They’ll B Time Virgil.

1367 Days Without B III, Day 808 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 113 ~Air Braxton’s For Virgil~

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So, not a dime left for 2-V’s day? I got a bag of food. V only drinks bottled water. I’ve never given him a slice of hot dog or cheese. What took my B… Virgil could use a nail trim. Would that be a treat? Two days ago, maybe. Air Braxton’s For Virgil

Tuesday, October 22, 2024

Meditation 113 ~Air Braxton’s For Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? My love for you is boundless, and I want you to remember that. I cherish every moment we share, and I hope you never tire of hearing me say it. Is this what they call words of Affirmation, baby girl.

Unfortunately, my love language isn’t receiving or giving gifts. And it isn’t Quality time with us speaking so early. Today is Friday, October 18, 2024. I wish I could go back to… What? Sunday, January 31, 2021. The day I lost my firstborn son Braxton.

Honestly, my love, I’m thinking about Tuesday, October 20, 2020. The day V was born.

And me being the selfish pri… person I am. I continue to imagine Emergence Day. Everything that I bought for myself. Well, other than food-related. Air, space, and being alone.

If only my Old Man had left my mother alone. “I don’t wanna die. I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all.” That’s the God-honest truth, my love. Wow, Michael Jackson and Queen. Hmm.

Michael Jackson would be great for a party… two days ago. Virgil’s birthday is Sunday, October 20, 2024. What am I getting him? Can you imagine what I’d buy you? Or how about any of our kids that walk on two legs? Or crawling. “Feel like makin’ love to you.”

I told Lady Sophia how I was reading about the Graham family in Everything Dies: Season One. Vincent, his wife Kristin, and their daughter Emily. I was going to say I can’t imagine the heartache, but I had to watch my son Braxton breathe his last breath. And when’s the last time I’ve taken a breath that wasn’t for or about my little boy Braxton.

But there’s another little guy out there. My little Virgil.

And I ain’t doing a DARN thing for him. He’s turning four. Giving him air and space isn’t helping. What? I was gone less than an hour to pick up sour cream, BBQ, and a burger. So um… I kicked him out of the bedroom for making a mess on the floor. And he’s been pacing around ever since, waiting for me to forgive him. An Act of Service. Hmm. He’s been extra cuddly lately, and it’s been cold, but by the click-clack on the floor, he could use a groomer’s nail trim. What about buying a new bathroom space so the floors stay clean.

Anything that didn’t belong to my Braxton. Like my heart? We’re Between the Sheets. But Virgil… Air Braxton’s For Virgil

1360 Days Without B III, Day 801 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 106 ~Braxton and Virgil… Oafs~

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I’ve knelt to both my sons. I’ve imagined I would kneel before some woman. Take an arrow to the knee? Hell! It’s a fight to get out of bed. And had I but the courage, I would never rise. But I stand and fall for my boys. Braxton and Virgil… Oafs

Tuesday, October 15, 2024

Meditation 106 ~Braxton and Virgil… Oafs~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Is it a love that surpasses even the bond with my firstborn son, Braxton? Well… I’ve never made a solemn promise before God, but my love for you is unwavering.

Ask me when I last spoke to the divine. I’ve pleaded for the life of my son, and I’ve begged to join him when I was at death’s door. I’m not sure if I’m conversing with a deity, a spirit, or something else, but I do so every day ask…

Darling, I’m sorry to say this, but I ask the “Spirit In the Sky” for the courage to find B. If you know what I mean. And I’ve asked God how I was fortunate enough to see you. It was as if I stumbled and fell into your love, and I’m eternally grateful for it.

Or how do they say, “I Took an Arrow in the Knee? I’m a lover, not a fighter… I wish. These days, my Love … damn near every day, I feel like a warrior. To have their discipline, determination, and death. I want to fall.

Death Wish? More like dedication. I ask you… hell, I scream out to you, “Don’t Give Up On Me.” “Have a Little Faith in Me.” More music? To cover up my mourning, moaning, or whatever it is I’m doing. I fear that Living will become one of those haunting words.

Words like Happiness, Home, or Hilarious/Laughter. Something that means nothing. From a linguistic point of view. I know the words exist, but what do I think about when they are spoken? I feel exactly what I felt that led to Braxton’s passing. Indifference, My Love.

And with all the time I had last week… women sans clothing. Such is my awesome business, both a blessing and a curse. I’ve been looking to… be better. I don’t know. Can I be?

I don’t know what got me to kneel before Braxton that first time and say, “Whatever happens, stay with me. I’ll look after you.” Eowyn’s words. A woman’s words. Sexist…


Honestly, My Love, I was about to be. Do forgive me. I should say that I’ve been looking for the words from the brave, of champions, even devils, if need be. Even the simplest, ok.

Like Warhammer 40,000 Space Marine II… “For The Emperor!” Something to have me kneel and then stand if but to show you “I can be the man you need me to be.” But if I can’t even honor my Braxton. Or look after Virgil. I trip over myself. Falling. Crashing.

My boys keep their oaths; Love. Braxton and Virgil… Oafs.

1353 Days Without B III, Day 794 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 099 ~Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For~

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To think I want to have a business someday that focuses on “pornographic passions…” Well, not if Trump takes the White House. Seriously? Stormy Daniels. “Playboy Playmates?” Yet I’m sweating over a retail job. Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For

Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Meditation 099 ~Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But not enough to give up slothfulness, “sins of the flesh, and what about silence?

Silence is a BIG subject. And aren’t I here to explain, when a man provides. Who, what, when, where, and why. But this week… sigh. It’s been all about time. And today, I didn’t even bother getting dressed. Yesterday, I sacrificed the entire afternoon because of stress and some Yabbos. Wouldn’t Braxton be proud? I’m not crying or bawling. Scared?

Sweating bullets. To think at one time, it would be because of a Day Job scheduled. And now? When it comes to owning, operating, and… Oh My God! But opening my place, opening bedroom doors, shirts, bras, pants, etc. Open legs and orifices. Eww! Wickedness.

You know how I make money. A man provides. And WCKD is good? Anything beats being afraid or slothful. But when? I have no answers.

Gus Fring didn’t ask when. He said, “A man provides.” But I have questions. Concerns. More like doubts and fears. Because I’m sitting here in our bed, worried about a time clock and losing everything

It comes with the territory. I have employees, insurance, laws, medical, and everything that comes with being “the man.” However, today, I’m back to feeling like “a man,” if that.

When Braxton was around, to provide, protect, and be a parent, I would do as Captain America… No! Steve Rogers put it, “WHATEVER IT TAKES.” Burn the boats, Carpe Diem, Leeroy Jenkins! My firstborn motivates me. You, my incredible wife. The children we brought into this world. So why is “Big Poppa” still sitting in bed looking at the clock?

Well, the world isn’t ending…

“Now that the world isn’t ending
It’s love that I’m sending to you
It isn’t the love of a hero
And that’s why I fear it won’t do” ― Hero

What time is it? Six minutes after… Another hour? Another six minutes after… No matter what, there is always time for another pop culture reference, a pump over some Yabbos, or a palpitation of my heart. I can be annoying, gross, and dark all in one sitting. I know, My Love. But what I don’t know is why I must be so terrified when it comes to wanting to live. I’m sorry to say I still wake up each and say, Dammit! Why am I awake? Why is Braxton gone? And why am I so scared. Because I feel I can’t provide for our family.

Today, I still believe the epitome of manhood is providing for one’s legacy… With my pen… Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For

1346 Days Without B III, Day 787 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will