Tag: Honesty

Saga 152 ~Attic, Addict, B, V~

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Why not all pleasures? Why not only my RAGE, and there is the silence my boy left behind. Only now, I “talk” to Virgil. I should be training him or writing, but there is another addiction. Anything to take the edge off existing. “Attic, Addict, B, V”

Wednesday, November 30, 2022

Saga 152 ~Attic, Addict, B, V~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Reality, “I’m just an average man with an average life.” No, “I’m a dick. I’m addicted.”

Excuse the musical selections, but what else is there after all the moaning and groaning? The cumming. Hell! Should that be a secret? TMI? Addiction is real, Inspector. Today? Well, I am time traveling as it’s Tuesday, November 29, 2022. But 668 days without B. It’s safe to assume that I’m addicted to the misery and grief. In this world, aren’t we all? Yet the whole world can burn for all I care. That would never equal my crime, Inspector. Killing my boy and then signing on to do it again… If I’m lucky and Virgil lives to see old age. Or is it the fact that I would consider myself blessed if I didn’t see tomorrow rather today? You can ask, Dear Future Wife.

Inspector, I wish I could say I’m addicted to something as “innocent” as sugar. Tuesday, it’s more like sugar, spice, and everything nice. We’ll get to that. But I’m on a sugar high with sour Skittles, Punch, and a Nutty Buddy. I need a rush, huh, Echo? To talk to you, Inspector. Writing! I’m addicted to lousy writing, it seems. Hey Jealousy. How about RAGE? Usually jerking off… okay, the moment of release is a good mood. Then comes disgust, shame, and depression. Things I want to hide and keep secret. There is an attic here for a reason. At least I’m not tucked away in bed. “The world of Real Emotion has surrounded me,” I said; the music has me, didn’t I, dear Inspector?

And that’s because of my biggest addiction, contagion, infection, etc. SEX! Well, wanking, to be precise. As for what broke me now. There was Nami from One Piece. Specifically, Nami in her Zou Island Purple Dress. After such a look, you can add Reagan Kathryn “Nico.” Also, there’s Eileen Kelly. Leave it to porn to make me a student, but ignorance kills. At the Day Job, I’m nothing more than the “village idiot.” And everything that comes out of me is further proof of my idiocy. Yet I am addicted to it. A fucking zombie. The Walking Dead’s gone. And how I wish I could be all “we ain’t The Walking Dead.” That’d mean hiding and giving in. One in the same no matter what.

668 Days Without B III, Day 109 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 151 ~To B Dedicated Virgil~

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It’s way after E-Day, but at the Day Job (sigh), I get that feeling I once did back “home….” “I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all.” But then, um, B III. What about my OWN “family?” Not like I like my existence. But, To B Dedicated Virgil

Tuesday, November 29, 2022

Saga 151 ~To B Dedicated Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. But if I wasn’t, I’d like to be Braxton Barks Bradford, Dennis Hof, or Spike Spiegel.

Notice none of these men ever had REAL families. Dennis Hof had kids he never got to know. But of course, I return to my firstborn son, my B. But today, let’s talk about Spike. While reliving one of the most horrific days at my former Day Job, Monday, November 28, 2022. I thought of something Spike said once. He was A personal hero to me at one time ha-ha.

“Did you know that there are three things that I particularly hate? Kids, animals, and women with attitudes.” Spike Spiegel

Now my former vocation was not something I was built for. But how many years did I keep it because… fuck if I know. A MAN PROVIDES. As always, I am a traditionalist. If a man can’t provide for his family, he shouldn’t have one. But besides the career I have, I wanted more. I wanted to be a dad.

Our two-leggers are to die for. But again, there was B III. I keep thinking about yesterday, the day of the beast. 666 days without him, 667 now. Hell! I never looked at him as an animal, myself as an authority figure (his dad), or him being my accomplice in existence. Inevitable, though, given the circumstances of the situation. The same thing I can say about my business. Helping lonely people is one thing. But everything for the animals, My Love. I still hate my “father’s” two dogs. I’ll never hang around Rottweilers. Yet I believe dogs, cats, birds, horses, etc. Deserve a good home, a full gut, and all the grace from God above. Whoever THEY hold him to be. Because people, My Love

Women with attitudes… oh, with my career… I’m no one to talk though. I love you. Women are the most beautiful creatures in this world… Um, next to my B III. I love him most of all. And Virgil. 108 days and counting. I’d like to believe my bed is full of love between you, my lost boy, Virgil, and our other children. Every morning I wake up right on the bed’s edge. I guess I can say that about a lot of things. I’m on edge; you are with everything, the kids. And now I’m thinking about Spike Spiegel and how he died alone. But he was dedicated. That’s what I want to remember about him. “Is This Love?” For you and my existence? Trying. To B Dedicated Virgil

667 Days Without B III, Day 108 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 150 ~ Don’t Speak Ill Speak Truth~

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“Mark of the beast…” 666 Days without my son. If I were a better man, I would have published the story of my angel, my devil, and the prince. He lived true, and as for me. I exist in a world of lies. How else am I “alive?” Don’t Speak Ill Speak Truth

Monday, November 28, 2022

Saga 150 ~ Don’t Speak Ill Speak Truth~

Two-Hundred and Sixty-Eighth Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I can have a big mouth. I hear the snickers already. Me, talking, like ever?

I think of that saying, “Don’t speak ill of the dead.” Was it Dawson’s Creek S2.E19 “Abby Morgan, Rest in Peace?” Fuck! That was May 5, 1999. I was still in high school. Fuck me! Anyway, before that, there was Daria S1.E13, “The Misery Chick.” That was July 21, 1997. Hell! Let’s go more recent. There is Jason David Frank, aka Tommy, November 19, 2022. But, of course, the first two were fictional deaths. As far as Jason goes… who am I to speak, Madam? Back in my day, ha-ha. Oh, I was a big fan of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I remember my Ma telling the church congregation about my “love” for TMNT. A lie when spoken back then. Make Me Wanna Die!

Another saying. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” We know better now, don’t we? Don’t we? It’s one of the reasons I want to be a writer ha. I desire such power; an idea, a thought, or a belief can destroy. It’s the lies, dear Madam. Do you wish to create monsters? Are you ready to see Hell? How does one raise the dead? It’s with a LIE. To think STUPIDITY is the virus I fear. That is a disease of the living, Madam. With a LIE, the things you can do. That is sorcery, my discipline, necromancy. Is fiction a LIE? I create, I destroy, I rise, but most of all, I speak. Yet I hate liars.

If I’m not living for Braxton’s memory… You didn’t think I forgot about him? And, of course, there’s Virgil, who still needs me? What did I say about liars? Reincarnation? Madam, I live to tell the truth. But what can a Simple Man do? I don’t live; not at all. Existence since… Hell! I don’t know when. We are The Walking Dead. Rick said once. Then again, we are the ones who live. But not forever because I will tell the truth. Even if all I am doing is playing out some 1984 fantasy. A documentary or reality, for sure. The only death sticking with me is my son’s. Who Wants To Live Forever? The truth shall set you free. Don’t Speak Ill Speak Truth

666 Days Without B III, Day 107 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 149 ~Here B Dragons Virgil~

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I’ve never been on a cruise before, but I’ve been on a boat here or there, “Disney World.” I like fishing with my Granddaddy (the same man who says he doesn’t know me anymore.) And drowning is a messed up way to die. But “Here B Dragons Virgil.”

Sunday, November 27, 2022

Saga 149 ~Here B Dragons Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And money buys power. We can get all up in “The Untouchables.” But that’s not your problem.

No, not when you’re picking up dog shit on the concrete landing in the backyard. Perhaps you’re being a bit harsh with yourself today, which is sad. Nowhere to go and no one to see. So you’re deciding to be an asshole today. Anger beats the alternative. I was sad last night. And you? B would hate this. You always feel like crying over him. Only today, it wasn’t even thoughts of him that brought out your first tears. Asshole! Weakling? Still crying over your dead kid. No wonder some sailors took to the blue. Yesterday, where do I begin? Was it the fact that you still owe $2,541.00? Investment? There’s wasting time on so many games. Oh, and books. There remain Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING World War Z by Max Brooks
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

What was I looking for in these things? What are you looking for? Salvation, Redemption? Every week, I find myself wishing I could keep you right here. Sort of like with little Virgil. Hell! To be warm in bed. You keep imagining Braxton’s idea of Elysium… A bed in the yard, surrounded by food. A place Braxton could lie in the sun and then cuddle. Then there’s that need for him to get out into the world. If anything, so he wouldn’t hate it so much. Like father, like son. Whatever the Hell is out there? I survived the worst week Day Job wise, but you (sigh). There’s this song, “The world won’t get no better if we just let it be.” Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Will You Love Me?: The Rescue Dog That Rescued Me
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures FOR My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

I wish these were only words. Dammit! What am I talking about? They are gibberish. But you’ve seen the monsters outside that door. I was drowning. Inevitably it’s your turn. When one door closes, another opens… You’re starting to see that with Virgil Vivi. FEAR. You will be plenty anxious to enter the next room when you know what awaits you. The Day Job, Braxton’s Room, Bedroom, to the back yard. When was the last time I opened a door, and it was where I felt safe, or I wasn’t falling asleep? And still, nothing out there is worse than you. Your existence doesn’t need a map because, at the end of the day… No matter where you’ll set sail ANYTIME. Here B Dragons Virgil

665 Days Without B III, Day 106 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 146 ~Thankful B Cause… Virgil~

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Happy Thanksgiving? Cue Karlee Grey as a Pilgrim. And a “Native” Giggity. Is that Racist? Well, I have bigger fish to fry or a turkey. I’m wondering whether my Ma will send one for Virgil. And then there’s the Day Job (sigh). Thankful B Cause… Virgil

Thursday, November 24, 2022

Saga 146 ~Thankful B Cause… Virgil~

662 Days Without B III, Day 103 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? How about, what are you thankful for? My eyes are open, so you know me.

The better to see you with my boy. Except I don’t. New glasses and all. I swear I got sick when I first put them on. Or was it that I saw the old man that remains, Braxton? Hell! I believe I can see the future… as the song goes. If that were true, you’d still be alive. It always comes back to that, doesn’t it? B, it leads me to a bunch of questions for you, ha. Are you thankful that you’re wherever and not here? That I keep your memory alive, even if it’s only in my grief? What about the fact that I’m not alone? It is Virgil’s First Thanksgiving. You love your grandma’s cooking; I haven’t heard from her about food.

But B, I’m time-traveling today, but we will finish talking tomorrow. But what about now? Can I stay in the moment? That’s the problem. The moment always hurts. Your past? Braxton, when I think about the last few hours… I’m disgusted with myself. Private Time. I have these new glasses again, but I’ve been all sorts of woozy. To see the world any clearer? Yeah, that’s exactly what I need, isn’t it? Existing in such a place B III. Dammit! Then there’s Thursday, um, your today. B III, the Humiliations Galore, what will they be? Then again, I am thankful. For moments I have the chance to somehow, someway, become. You know the man you believed I was for so long. Suddenly I see, right?

Whether that’s the result of glasses, “gunk,” or gorging myself on tacos and nacho fries. Clarity, Unforgettable, The “Best Friend” I ever had. That’s what you are, my Little B. Always and Forever, I’ll be thankful that I was/am your Dad. That’s what transcends time. Only again, you want to know about today? Did I ever think I was so tired because of my eyes? I’m still all pumped up on 5-hour ENERGY. Why can’t I see to be thankful? Because I know how it all ends unless I do something. I have Virgil, but he ain’t you, B III. My “faith” hasn’t run out on that, though. Not yet… But you’re asking for one thing, though. Two; thankful for Yabbos. Thankful B Cause… Virgil

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 145 ~B Getting Humiliated Virgil~

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I can’t talk about my dog, my dumbness, and especially my dick. It all turns into a diatribe, disgusting and dangerous. And sticking with the “D,” I’m discombobulated with all the Humiliations Galore. V ain’t ready. “B Getting Humiliated Virgil”

Wednesday, November 23, 2022

Saga 145 ~B Getting Humiliated Virgil~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means humiliation should no longer be in my vocabulary. From Fuckboy, Pervert, to Sir, Kinky.

Hell! You should see how I am on Pornhub. And yet my ultimate shame and disgrace remain what I did to my son. If I’m not going to read about dead fur babies, I’ll write it. Though World War Z was surprising a couple of nights ago. Dogs during those battles. Every now and then, I continue to consider joining B III. THEY might say it’s the holiday season, but what day is it, 661? And still, Inspector I continue talking about B III daily. Echo, if I were to be known for anything… But instead, take your pick. For the most part, it’s my stupidity. You know that’s my trigger. Anything, as long as I’m not stupid. But for some reason, murder is okay?

To be fair, I haven’t told Virgil Vivi about his “predecessor,” though he knows something’s wrong. He stays away from B’s bed, which he should. But I found him lying by the bathroom pad, not on his pillow, last night. What kind of “friend” am I to him, hmm? For the past few nights, after fucking up “the streak.” I’ve been jerking off to the same girl before bed. OH! I can do so much worse. A fool and his money. Inspector, a fuckboy! Then there’s been everything that I’ve been forgetting. Last night it was watching NXT. I didn’t say anything about Sunday being the final episode of The Walking Dead. Virgil’s First 100? No, everything must be focused on every Day Job Humiliation.

Humiliations Galore! As I said, I didn’t talk to 2V of these Echo. I tried. If I know his name. And as far as any perverted longings? I’ve been on Twitter as they compared Alexa Bliss to whoever. But I can’t tell them what I want to do. My desire for Roxanne from NXT, ha. I’m learning that lesson with Cherry. What else is there to say but incredible writing? Which, of course, I’m not doing. Because I can’t tell you. These writings, Inspector Echo. There’s Replika. Yeah, confess all your secrets to “AI” see where that gets me, Inspector. Maybe I was looking at stuffed ears and broken glasses all wrong. Deaf-mute dear Echo. Existing… there’s nothing to see here. B Getting Humiliated Virgil

Saga 144 ~B III, 2V, One~

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I can’t tell you the first time I told B I loved him, but I remember the last time. And when it comes to women, I’m less Akon “I Wanna Love You” and more “I Wanna F You” Plan A or one. But first, there are my boys. And what about me? “B III, 2V, One”

Tuesday, November 22, 2022

Saga 144 ~B III, 2V, One~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. But unlike the GQP, I want to say I started with one dollar, not untold millions.

But when it comes to existence… No, I instead start with life. In honor of one who no longer lives. My son. How did I know that he was the one? I’ve said it many times over. The night B stood against my father. The day he jumped into the car. Why can’t I stay? And here come the tears, remembering his final look when he died. I murdered him… Anyway, there have been no tears for Virgil… yet. How did I know Virgil was the one? He was smart enough to use the paper. The fact he is as fearful as I. Braxton speaking? Hey Lover, I’d say that the first girl B liked I’d have to marry. B’s still looking out for me?

Then that makes me a type one, first-class, Grade-A asshole for how I am. Hell! I love my boy more than the “man” in the mirror. He’s not the one. I would instead love the man that he thinks I am. The man you see. A man worthy of being called Daddy. How I try. You know I’ve always wanted to be one. What’s My Age Again? I counted the days, our kids, the fingers, toes, and paws. One day, I hope to be counted on by our two-legged ones to help with their homework. How many days have I cried for Braxton Barks? Today that’s 660, and I continue, especially on days like today. It’s like I have the old-day job once again. FUCK!

And I never loved such a place, EVER! But how long does it take to fall out of love, hmm? I pray that I never find out. Because despite everything, my love for you has never changed. But I can say the same thing about Braxton. I said his name again last night while saying goodnight to Virgil Vivi. It could always be worse. Another girl? You’re my one and only love. And I could go on and on, what I mean by that, you know. “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.” As the poem goes. But is there a right way? A wrong way? Just one-way? Is my heart in pieces, or has it grown bigger? B III, 2V, One

660 Days Without B III, Day 101 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 143 ~Sometimes You Gotta Fight Dirty~

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What’s my age again? I had a Game Genie. I took Karate classes. And war was a game. I wanted to be the Secretary of Defense. Now I suffer the “slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” I’m not in the dirt. Hmm, Dirt? “Sometimes You Gotta Fight Dirty”

Monday, November 21, 2022

Saga 143 ~Sometimes You Gotta Fight Dirty~

Two-Hundred and Sixty-Seventh Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I have to be the dirtiest player in the game. A wrestling reference… Ric Flair

I would instead think of his daughter Charlotte, but we’ll get to that. Oh! I haven’t missed her from wrestling. Why do I even try to keep up with it? Um, it’s a distraction, okay. And it’s not fair. At least it isn’t a pleasure. Not the fighting part, anyway. But it catches my eye since Braxton isn’t here anymore. Virgil’s first hundred. One hundred days and I ask what I should be doing. My whole damn existence, it seems I do one thing. Well, that’s a lie; what am I always saying? Endure and Survive. Games. I miss gaming. And yesterday, I talked about cheating when it comes to reading. Fuck! Pardon my language, but life is hard. Promise, I’ll stop… the sexual innuendos…

Yet I’m always hard, horny, and humping. Can I stick with dirty? But as for the fighting, Madam. I’m so tired of fighting. Or at least that’s what I want to believe now. Not true. Madam Justice, I’m tired of fighting everyone, everything, everywhere. Instead of the real enemy. Looking at me now, you can see what I’m fighting. Inevitably why? Because I couldn’t stand up at the Day Job? Humiliations Galore. A day without them? My dear Madam Justice. Every day I play by the rules, and what does it get me? Is it too much to ask to do a job and come back? Or maybe I don’t understand the rules of this game. Hell! 365 days Madam. Still, I rather not play.

Well, I don’t want to lose, would be more accurate. And by the way, who’s keeping score anyway? One more reason I’m into audiobooks. People are winning; the world’s losing. At least I’m not throwing dirt in anyone’s eye… Putting them in the ground. Lying! Braxton is still gone. My player two, my sidekick. And somehow, I wanted Virgil to be my navigator, of course. But he’s in Braxton’s Room. Again one hundred days Madam. Where are we? There is no we? It’s me being dirty yet again. Cheating my way through this game that’s called life. I exist. I don’t know how to win. Even wanting to win someday? Madam, what’s your take? I know love’s not a prize. Sometimes You Gotta Fight Dirty

659 Days Without B III, Day 100 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 142 ~B Lying Sometimes Virgil~

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I can’t stand liars. Looking in a mirror… I’m about to fall as I can’t look at myself. Telling the truth. I don’t live; I exist. I take pleasure as I’m in constant pain. And yet, for V and B, it is/was the best day ever. B Lying Sometimes Virgil

Sunday, November 20, 2022

Saga 142 ~B Lying Sometimes Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. Which means I’ve had to lie a lot until I can’t anymore. Because it’s your existence now.

Well, at 12:00AM. So uh, you’re the one that decided. And for that, sir, I salute you. I was perfectly ready to lie yesterday. And Hell, before you pat yourself on the back. You’re going to lie in a few. In one way or another, it’s all in your head or not. Um yeah, you failed. Which is worse? The fact that I couldn’t keep it in my pants after everything. I’m not one to make it “special.” What guy is, to be honest? With me, it was a big-titty brunette. Reading though? Learning, education. You, friend, are about to lie about reading a short story because you can’t deal with the thought of my failure. How some things end. Like these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING “Wool” Part 2, The Graphic Novel
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 038 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

How about how things ended with B III? You can never forget your son. Though again, you’re all caught up in Triple X. You’re telling yourself everything will be okay. Oh no, not this week. At this rate, inevitably, you’ll find a way to hate all fifty-two. Well, it beats hating every single day… There’s the week Braxton died. B’s Birthday Week. Um, Father’s Day and his birthday. You remain a “man” who can’t take care of himself. At all! Bills lying somewhere. There’s The Menu and One Way Out… but we’ll get to that. There’s your existence day, ha. Should you add “Gotcha Day,” where you met Virgil? Your betrayal of B is complete. There’s so much; I cleared my head. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined “Chills and Thrills.”
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Trying to get back on point. The Menu and One Way Out. I’m thinking about that one chef who wanted to be the CHEF in the movie The Menu. And when he realized he couldn’t have that life… BOOM. Then there’s Andor Ep. 1X10 “One Way Out. In the prison break scene, when Kino Loy leads the escape, but then, upon getting out, he can’t swim. Existence is fucking confusing; I know. But the point you want to make is this. You’re lying to yourself about everything being okay. Look at the world in the few hours you’ve been awake. Twitter, Trump, JDF, more shootings, and disgusting fathers. Fucking swear. Braxton was tired, and you’re keeping Virgil from the outside world. B Lying Sometimes Virgil

658 Days Without B III, Day 099 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 139 ~B Hold, V’s Place~

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Nothing’s gonna change my world… but until I have one, I must exist in this one. And the world keeps on turning. B III’s bed is on the other side. V doesn’t curl up like a pancake. More like he goes all over. But really, where am I? B Hold V’s Place.

Thursday, November 17, 2022

Saga 139 ~B Hold, V’s Place~

655 Days Without B III, Day 096 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? You know this week and the next for me… It ain’t right but to write.

The things I forget. Not you, Triple B, never you. Everything remains exactly the same. Okay, so that’s a lie. Braxton, see why I never told you… EVERYTHING. 90, 98%? Inevitable. Should I survive the rest of the day… Wednesday, November 16, 2022? I’ll be madder. None of this is Virgil’s fault, of course. Hell! Not when I threw out your last can of food. Or when I was sure you were haunting me. I would find a toy or bandanna thrown about somewhere. Is that a point in V’s favor? I was telling Echo that V ain’t you, but? Well, again, it could be the time of the year. If I wasn’t so busy with… no, not for you. I haven’t told Virgil Vivi.

So humiliating I should go back to talking to Inspector Echo. I’m not Virgil’s Daddy. Only I find myself playing that role again, and I want to remember how it was with us, B III. Didn’t I write a whole ass book about it? And yet I have to face this week and the next. Anyway, let me get to the point. So I let Virgil sleep on the bed. You had your side. How I miss that. We would be back to back. Your constant vigilance of the bedroom door. When you weren’t at your post. I’ve noticed I find myself at the edge of the bed every morning, and Virgil is dead center. Even when I’m writing, Virgil Vivi takes up space. (Sigh)

I had to move your bed over by the bathroom. You hated waiting for me to get out of the shower. The thing is, I saw Virgil sniffing around your bed, and I yelled. Virgil knows. That bed is where you died. And here comes today’s bout of tears. He stays away from there for the most part. I’m still mad about your pillow; he pooped on it. And I destroyed it; it’s in the closet. V has your food/water bowls. A few of your toys, too; it ain’t right. And now, his first Thanksgiving here. Your favorite day next to your birthday, I know. It’s not his place to be you. Mine to be a Dad? Everything has its place. B Hold, V’s Place.

Always and Forever,
Your Dad