Gospel 034 ~Will Hits New Lowe’s~

Last night, yet again different woman, same situation as in me, saying something I shouldn’t have. My kid and I hate sudden loud noises, but everyone seems to hate anything I have to say. “Will Hits New Lowe’s,” how do I soundproof my life?

Tuesday, August 4, 2020

Gospel 034 ~Will Hits New Lowe’s~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so we have our home with our own private beach. We also have a house out in the woods with a crystal blue lake out front. Now keeping in mind that I can’t swim. You also know how I am about feet. There’s also the fact that while I don’t hate sand, like Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader. I only tolerate it… Okay, let me start over because I’m putting my foot in my mouth. Let’s talk about something like household repair, hmm.

Yeah, what would I know about that? I’m only looking to make noise, I guess. Much like my writing, I’m more about looking the part. I need a decent pair of work boots because I’m sure I’ll do a lot of stomping around, running away. Hell, one will end up in my ass. Excuse my language, Baby Doll, me and my big mouth, and that’s my problem. Last night I talked about never lying to you. There are things I don’t want to tell you. No matter what, though, I always end up hurting you, even texting. Might as well have a clean phone. As the song goes, Love Is An Open Door, yet I need more of them and locks. What, am I trying to find someplace to hide from you Love? Like the horror movies I love, the monster gets the girl or the hero, and I’m not sure which I am on any given day. I’m trying to build us a home.

One more reason I’m a billionaire, so I can pay someone else to do it. I’m sure I could use a paintbrush only don’t hold me to that. Christian Grey’s playroom shone red, but with ours, I want to “Paint It, Black.” The only time I don’t worry about words, albeit a safeword. You know how “chains and whips excite me” well, us isn’t that right, Baby Girl. The things I want to learn for both of us. I can’t change a tire; I know a little bit about changing the oil. I’m nobody when it comes to plumbing… in a house. I love my firstborn like pancakes, but I couldn’t build a doghouse. I’m no farmer, but with things as of now, I’m going to have to learn more than growing black roses too.

Not avoiding you Love but talking Will Hits New Lowe’s.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 031 ~I’m One Will Away~

Another week has come to pass, and I’m still not going to bed at a decent hour. I know the way, but I don’t have the will to work and hell wasn’t I doing the Day Job this week and 5000 words the last one. I’m One Will Away, from going crazy

Saturday, August 1, 2020

Gospel 031 ~I’m One Will Away~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but do I have the will to stay there? Lady Lu, there’s what you have to do, what you could do, and what you want to do. As the saying goes, you know, will meet the way and all. My motivations ask, what do you want?

I have no passion for the Day Job, but I find the will to get out of bed and go. Tonight I’ll say, has been pretty decent and then my “father” called. Do I call it will or fear the reason I answered it? All the money I need to be saving and yet here I go again staying out longer. People talk about being an adult is all about making these choices. You do what must get done. Again my motivations say, if you do what’s easy, life is hard. If you do what’s hard, life will be easy. So that demands the question, what am I complaining about. Yeah, I hate the Day Job, but when I know where I stand with it… With my “father” hell, that’s accepting the worst-case scenario. For the record, he called me about “Quidditch” duh. I take it he wanted to humiliate me. Of course, staying out to go to McDonald’s is no damn good at all.

Now, what could I be doing tonight other than waiting for this new girl to break me? I could have been finishing Colleen Hoover’s book. What about emptying out my exploding email? I could try getting to bed at a decent hour, which already isn’t happening. No, I spent most of today sleeping, and if not, that I’ve been hard. I could have walked My Dæmon. I swear the boy is being quite the little trooper. Next week will be easy, but do I have the will to do what is hard dear Lady Lu.

You know what I want to do. I want to write books full time. One day I want to own a cathouse. I want women begging me to see them naked. One more reason tonight has been “excellent.” Still, I want my hands on my keyboard and not in my pants. I’ll even settle on my zombies, finally coming to fruition. For this to happen, all these wills have to go. The Settler, Mr. I Don’t Feel Like It, the Wisher. I’m One Will Away.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 027 ~Will Manages Mattress Madness~

Are you going to ask me up, does a lady have to ask twice, I swear for Charlotte Lewis my behind would have been on the plane to Tibet but as Eddie Murphy asked, is that a bed, so where’s my bed? Will Manages Mattress Madness

Tuesday, July 28, 2020

Gospel 027 ~Will Manages Mattress Madness~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so does that mean I sleep more or less? Baby Doll I am not the type of man that has to be coerced, enticed, or seduced to end up in bed. I’m like Chandler to Kee; Jim to Aurora or well… better not to name that particular movie duo, but sexy.

Of course, let me start off by saying if you don’t know these characters um, why did we get married? As for that third movie, the words “Take Me To Bed” have never been so (cue Homer Drool). Let’s just say it’s Indigo Prophecy (Lucas and Tiffany) to cover my behind. So is it the fact that I have to hold secrets that are keeping me up nightly? I wish I could say I am contemplating the mysteries of the cosmos. Is it that our bed is so bad? Hell having you by my side would mean I’m buying the best bed ever. I told someone before it’s a lot easier staying up until four in the morning than waking up then and there. Only I have to be better Baby Girl, I know, we got kids, and my firstborn is starting to get annoyed.

Maybe it’s the idea that I am living the dream. Every night I’m lost to my writing, not reading mind you. Editing is the worst part of the game, even after a successful Camp NaNoWriMo run. The ideas keep pouring in for more stories and more scenes. A man that lives his life in bedrooms sometimes and you know I don’t mean it like that. It’s more like I forget to sleep. Only then, when I do get to bed, then what. You’re not helping to look at me like that. I’m living the dream. Who has time to sleep?

I remember the Day Job and walking around like a zombie. If someone is going to say, I look tired. It might as well be because I’m doing something I love. Not working my fingers to the bone and passing out. Only to regret three hours of missed opportunities. I shouldn’t be taking anything to bed, other than you, a happy puppy, and a clear head. Clear Eyes, Full Bra, Can’t Lose… yeah, no binge-watching Wynonna Earp I know. My motivations say it never ends, becoming a champion or loving someone. Will Manages Mattress Madness.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 025 ~Wilting Willy Or Recovery~

I’m hoping this week, I won’t be waiting till the midnight hour. I have one more chapter to go, and then that will be 50,000 words, and that’s another Camp NaNoWriMo in the books. Still, it’s like I’m missing something. Wilting Willy Or Recovery

Sunday, July 26, 2020

Gospel 025 ~Wilting Willy Or Recovery~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and when you are, make for damn sure you buy a better bed. Also, get girls with beautiful breasts and, for God’s sake, behave yourself. Now while this conversation is brought to you by the letter B, let’s talk about BALANCE. I haven’t had much of that last week, and what the Hell were you thinking about today? You should have been done with the novel by now. Why are you still 2500 words away from the finish? Don’t you know how this week is going to be? If there is anything to be grateful for, it’s your Dæmon. The little boy has been a trooper knowing how tired you were today.

Last night I spoke to Lady Lu about having nightmares, and all I dreamed about was losing another friend. It could mean that the story is coming to an end, of course. At least you were able to decide on the finale. The truth is, you wish you knew more evil English blondes. You know plenty of nasty American blondes; Tomi Lahren, Ivanka Trump, Kayleigh McEnany. Still, the story ends with the sweetest UK blonde, you know because Cherry’s from the UK, so. Now you’re thinking you should blame NO FAP or the fact that you haven’t been eating right. Those sound like excuses to me, but I take responsibility, this is my fault. Camp NaNoWriMo was kicking my ass, so I figured a solid week of work would make it right. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 020 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 028 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

At least I got two, but hear me now, you have to finish the story Monday, no exceptions. You never will otherwise, and why do you think I’m speaking to you so early, 9:30 PM? I’m giving you an out to not stay up all night because there is no food in the house. You have to shower, wash your mask, and get some sleep before the sun is high. No looking at lots of porn either, I swear this better not be the week you break. It’s still there, you know, you don’t have to imagine Cherry’s Yabbos or any other set of Yabbos. I was going to suggest you make not watching porn a thing, but you’re not ready to become the Man of La Mancha. Only you always have Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 028 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Complete My Novel For Camp NaNoWriMo On Monday
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, by Colleen Hoover

Again Monday you finish, then ask Wilting Willy Or Recovery.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 024 ~Nights Of The Willies~

Good night or more like good morning? Will I actually get to bed before 12 A.M. come Sunday? I have 2800 more words to go with the novel, so it has been one productive ass week. For something, I’ll never publish. “Night Of The Willies”

Saturday, July 25, 2020

Gospel 024 ~Nights Of The Willies~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but to be completely honest, I’ve about finished another story, thank you. As of my last count, I am now 2800 words away from the finish line. Only I still doubt I’ll get a decent night’s sleep tomorrow or today seeing how it’s 2:15 A.M. now.

As Ted Mosby put it “Nothing Good Happens After 2 A.M.” I believe it was Todd Chrisley that said something about 12 A.M. as well.

“Your curfew is 12, cuz ain’t nothing open after midnight except legs and the ER, and you’re gonna stay out of both of them.” –

On a personal note, Lady Lu, all I want is to get six hours of sleep and not have My Dæmon be confused some mornings.

Hell, I work these late nights to avoid the horrible days at the Day Job. So how is that working out for me, hmm? Do I owe some thanks to NO FAP though I was ready to break again? It would be something if I was having nightmares or something. The only thing I hate on these nights is finally going to bed and seeing the blue creep outside my window. I know I shouldn’t be putting that sort of negativity out into the world. Be careful what you wish for My Lady. At this point, I want more of the Simple Things, thank you, Mr. Huynh. Now, how many white men have I taken advice from in the past few minutes? Again Ted Mosby, Todd Chrisley. Oh, Mr. Huynh’s country singing voice belonged to Randy Travis from Hey Arnold.

Anyway, I would settle for a clean house for starters. I was going to say something else, but I suddenly got a touch of paranoia. Okay, so I’m writing because I hate my job and don’t want to be scared anymore. Nothing that I’ve written tonight is going to help me overcome that. Oh, and if I haven’t said enough about writing, I jumped the gun this afternoon. I tell you all the time I lie to Camp NaNoWriMo and stay up all night, making up for it. So in bed this afternoon, I accidentally marked I was finished with my novel. Don’t worry, I immediately erased the entry, but that didn’t stop them from giving me the badge. At least it will be right by today or tomorrow. Now shouldn’t I be grateful that I had this whole week to do something I love? Yeah, Lady Lu, that’s funny.

When will these long nights’ end? Nights Of The Willies.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 020 ~Will Is Sky High~

I’m not going to make a good husband overnight, hell I’m not even much of a good man, more like a frat boy, or a kid that’s had the house to himself for a few years. So how am I ever going to get some angel? Will Is Sky High.

Tuesday, July 21, 2020

Gospel 020 ~Will Is Sky High~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I can promise you it won’t be for dancing. Let me go ahead and tell you, I’ll never stop using song lyrics daily. Who knows, you might get me on the dancefloor someday. For now, though, as the song goes, So if I hold you in my arms, I won’t dance. What can I say, baby girl? I still quite enjoy our Saturday morning listening sessions in bed. Only the thing I want to talk about is getting up and about and during the plague era, well easier than done?

For example, as I began, I am a billionaire, and so are you. I’ve said this before, but I’ll stop buying the cheapest sneakers that get soaked in the grass every morning. You know when I’m walking the kid. The fanciest shoes I own, I bought for my best HUMAN friend’s wedding. I’ll also remember what pants size I wear. Not trying to sound like a little boy, but I go to work, the store, and hopefully the movies. When I win an AEE award, I’ll still be wearing a pair of jeans. Now how did I dress on our wedding day? Okay, before I go all pop culture geek. I’m still going to get lost in books, both writing, and reading. I have plenty of games on my phone, and I do get distracted. Well, I did do five thousand words today for Camp NaNoWriMo, so that is something.

Speaking of which, I’ll start buying more shirts that aren’t branded with NaNoWriMo. Yes, I’m pretty proud of being a part of that. I buy you plenty of stuff, but you’re so beautiful I can’t help myself, and it could be worse… shoes (shudders). I want to have control of my health for you and the kids. I swear I’ve been meaning to see a dentist. Did I mention how much I like masks? Not funny, yeah, because I want to see some zombies. Lastly, I want to be able to tell you things, to speak out loud. People find my writing confusing, but my silence every day, for some reason, is scary. You’re not scared, are you, My Love? I’m not comparing you to a summer’s day exactly, but as I say, I love my little boy like pancakes. I love you like Star Wars. Will Is Sky High.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 018 ~Your Second Chances Will~

As the song goes *ahem,* I’m gonna wait ‘till the midnight hour. If anything, I wish I had a chance to do today all over again, which would mean waking up at 4 AM instead of just seeing my bed then. I got stories to write. “Your Second Chances Will.”

Sunday, July 19, 2020

Gospel 018 ~Your Second Chances Will~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but do I hold out much hope for you? At the Day Job, when I can remember too, of course, I live in “Day-tight Compartments.” That’s a lesson from Dale Carnegie. It means you deal with what’s right in front of you today. You’re not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, only handling today. I can see now that you don’t agree. Looking at yourself right this second, where are you? Sitting in bed, pausing YouTube with Fear The Walking Dead. Your Dæmon is being a trooper, though.

Now I covered this yesterday, I know. I went shopping for peanuts, and I mean that literally. Publix sells the Atlanta Braves Peanuts. Then there was the panic at the broken ATM. A minuscule amount of shopping at Walmart. Oh yeah, being called Ma’am picking up BBQ. As for the future, it’s like I say, “just another day.” You would rather not speak about it, and yet you have no choice, because what happens if you don’t? Like last night all the lights were blazing, and you’re falling asleep at 4 AM instead of waking up. Today there is even more stress having to talk to you, and you wonder why everyone leaves. Of course, while you can barely get it up to live, you drooled over Tifa Lockhart again. There was Abigail Breslin’s impressive Yabbos. Let’s never forget these long-overdue sadly Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 014 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 020 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

Once again, as the song goes, Back At One. The thing is you want a second chance, so do I.

Strange that I mentioned Peanuts the food, but what about the gang that sang, I Know Now. If you’re getting lost, that’s from Charlie Brown, “and have my life to live over knowing what I know now.” Second can also mean plenty of things. For example, that second is the first loser. Is that from one of my motivations? There was Mark Wahlberg, aka Elliot Moore asking for a second. Then there’s all of us who need a second, a minute, an hour, days, weeks. All you want is a chance and every week you get another one. You don’t even need to wait seven days. You can change whenever you want and stop living as a second, third-class, a Tallie. Live Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 020 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

Will you, though, your chances seem as plentiful as your excuses. Your Second Chances Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 013 ~He Willie Loves You~

They say diamonds are forever, what about books? I got mad at someone and gave them a piece of mind… on my way to 100,000 words. Someone else got around 50,000. The woman I’ll marry, though? Sing it with me, “A NeverEnding Story.” He Willie Loves You

Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Gospel 013 ~He Willie Loves You~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now because I refuse to think otherwise. As is my love for you. If that’s the case, though, why am I still so afraid of losing it, of losing you. The past few weeks, I’ve been hurting over some loss friends… please hear me out. When people leave me, there’s no grouping of my sins, no I’m giving up on you, not even goodbye. So here I am writing the things I needed to say. When I stop, though, I mean there are no more words, links, or when I forget to check for days on end. Writers both fear and relish these two words, “The End.”

“I will eviscerate you in fiction. Every pimple, every character flaw. I was naked for a day; you will be naked for eternity.” – Geoffrey Chaucer – A Knight’s Tale

I’ve told you that writing is my dream and you are too, My Love. Only you’re here, you’re mine and novel-writing, well the words keep coming. My motivations might say you have to love the pain, a writer sits and bleeds upon the page. One day though, let’s assume the current subject matter will fall away, and they’ll be something more. You’ve watched me become one with the music, a slave to the work, a man of silence. I always say this, I’m a hard man to know. That’s one more reason I write and like smart girls, not that you should spend your life learning about me. So that’s a lie because I want to know everything about you. They say that if women came with instructions, no man would read it. Instead, Baby Girl, I choose to write it every day I can.

“Well, you know, Henry Miller said the best way to get over a woman is to turn her into literature.” – 500 Days of Summer

It’s not about the money I know, but I want to write the checks and read the bills. Our kids had a library before they even knew how to spell their names. I see my firstborn with his little beard and his every hair turning gray being read to. I look upon all the love letters and poems that I wrote to you. No, you didn’t throw them away, laugh, or use them in a court case at some point, I wonder. You read my book and see those words The End or hell To Be Continued, and you ask how many words will it take? With one, it might take 50,000 thank you, NaNoWriMo. Another might take double or triple. You, My Love, are the song on repeat, my new dream. You, My Baby Doll, will be my never-ending story. He Willie Loves You.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 011 ~Only The Willing Tonight~

What time is it, one of my motivations talks about waking up at 4 AM and I find I’m not getting to bed until 2 AM and why? I’m writing another story and still falling behind. 10,000 words so far. Only The Willing Tonight

Sunday, July 12, 2020

Gospel 011 ~Only The Willing Tonight~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means you should be waking up at 4:00 AM. I don’t recall the last time I saw bed before 2:00 AM all last week. Now I know I can’t say I have left you in a good position. Hell, you’re still down 10,000 words, and Chapter Five doesn’t even have a title yet. The story is coming together, though, and I’m proud of you for being somewhat productive. You’ve added 2,100 words, a hundred less than yesterday, but what NaNoWriMo asked of you. Well, you know what your motivations say about the bare minimum. It’s not 120%.

Why is tonight all about the numbers? Snowpiercer went from 1,001 cars long to 994. It was also the season finale, so that’s one more reason you’re up so late. Oh yeah, Rowan Blanchard was in this episode as Alexandra Cavill, so yeah, you want to see her Yabbos. That’s one thing that’s not going to change, the quest for Yabbos. I had to stop myself from reaching out to MILF Dos or Cherry this week. There is so much work to be done, and I added two new girls to the novel. There’s Cassie Laila Dillon, played by Cindy Aurum. Also, I have Deeana Jillian Ramsay, who is Rebecca from Marvel Charm. Well, that’s your problem now, like the rest of this week. I always leave you in the worst position I know, and I’m sorry. So Yeah um there’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 007 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 014 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

Two grueling weeks, you don’t know what it’s like, but you will. Do yourself a favor, though, and don’t go offering MILF Dos or Cherry $500. Nothing good happens after 2 AM a dumbass once said (cough) Ted Mosby. Yeah, I shouldn’t be coughing either; The Coronavirus (COVID-19) getting worse all around. The one thing you’re not worried about when it comes to this life. For someone’s life is one reason the lawn got cut because I was trying to help that someone out. A lie, of course, I was too lazy to do it. Every night when I say I’m going to do better, what happens? Funny, I was thinking about that song from Creed, With Arms Wide Open. I want to tell you, I hope you’re not like me but Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 014 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

All I ask of you besides JSS, yes, that’s from The Walking Dead. Write Your Story, Only The Willing Tonight.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 346 ~When Will Got Bunk’d~

Oh, the things I want to do in bed, well maybe three things, sex, sleep, and anything and everything to keep the story going, though what writing have I been sharing this week? Words can work, like any other sex toy. “When Will Got Bunk’d?”

Thursday, June 11, 2020

Log 346 ~When Will Got Bunk’d~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now and should have thought about that title. Well, how much is the WWE worth, and if you recall, they named a team, The Submission Sorority. Now you know I’m no genius, but I knew that was a porn title. Anyway, as glad as I am that Peyton Roi List is of legal age because I want to fuck her, let’s stick to my writing. Yes, I know I want to form a company grander than the WWE or Disney someday ha. Only where to begin? How about the business of making people want to fuck?

Guys like me, hell, I’m a guy like me. The thing is I forgot, let’s say my “Superpower.” I was only reminded of it last night. I’ve said before, much as Dennis Hof preached about having sex. Then immediately searching for the next party. How to fucking stay awake, well by fucking. So I haven’t been laid in quite sometime hmm, and how is NO FAP going, you ask? 22 days, 21 hr, 7 min, 24 sec so almost a month. I was ready to break yesterday when I was reminded of Dollydicker’s pretty little tennis star. To be fair, I was working on something for MILF Dos. That’s what clued me in of the power these fingers have. Funny I mention, superpowers. Then there’s the whole great power and great responsibility line. I say we can’t all be Spiderman or Captain America, etc. Did I mention I want to fuck Emily Vancamp, “Sharon Carter?”

I told Cherry once that I find swearing crass somewhat, but if there was ever a time? How many times did I use the words “Drips and Drops” in my book? As many times as I’ve used FUCK, but how do I know? Today I finished another round of edits, right this morning. I’m pretty tired, but wasn’t I yesterday but and even back in high school writing for the boys? All so they could make the pretty girls panties drops and what was I doing alone. As Jayne from Firefly put it, “I’ll be in my bunk.” Doesn’t sound like much, does it? Only when I rediscover my power, a gorgeous woman is telling me I made her wet, and she’s going dildo shopping. The power of words Dirty Diana, written right here from my bed, her compliments, fuck.

So, When Will Got Bunk’d?

I Will Have No Fear