Gospel 026 ~Don’t Underestimate Your Own Insignificance~

Do you matter, if I asked the Day Job, I’m nowhere near ESSENTIAL, I know plenty of women who think I’m the worst thing for asking, “how are you?” I look at myself in the mirror, I should go back to bed. “Don’t Underestimate Your Own Insignificance.”

Monday, July 27, 2020

Gospel 026 ~Don’t Underestimate Your Own Insignificance~

Hundred And Forty-Seven Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how many others can I name besides Mark Zuckerberg and Jeff Bezos? It feels good to get down to brass tacks once again because I finished my book this morning. I’ve said it before, and I’ll repeat it… a book that no one will ever discover. Hell, I even set it up for a trilogy. Possibly with that UK blonde, I was talking about last night and Reagan Kathryn. I’m one in a million men that want to well… I think I have written enough sex talk for a while, or have I? I’m kidding, hmm?

Only this afternoon, while I was contemplating going to the store, I saw a picture of Momokun. It was one of her lewdest, and I wanted to say something about her lips. Now, this brings me to my point today. If I had said something like that, she would have blocked me, deleted me, something. How many messages, though, do you think she gets like that? You know one of my favorite tunes is The Man by Aloe Blacc. I’m not anyone exceptional, Madam Justice, and I know this goes against all my motivations, but I’m nobody. You know I’m always saying I want to be a better man, but most people see me is either the ant or the monster. I’m either not worth looking at. A sign of things to come, or I’m the worst thing to happen.

So I get used to being nothing, I accept it. Then it’s like I tell a girl she’s pretty and wham, bam, damn. Don’t get me wrong I know I’ve gone overboard with many a girl, I take responsibility. Look at something like OnlyFans, though. I’m again a number in the heard if I ignore a girl, so what. If I give them attention, I’m usually paying for it. You peek at any of my social accounts, and I am a pervert extraordinaire. Then again, who is paying attention to me? I go back and forth even here, Madam Justice. I can’t tell you everything because the moment that I do as the song goes, sigh, I’m a Bad Man.

Where’s the middle ground ever? How can I be someone who exists without being someone everybody will hate or fear? It’s easier to be nobody. So why am I writing?

Such are delusions of grandeur… Don’t Underestimate Your Own Insignificance.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 019 ~Three Gates, True, Necessary, Kind~

I wish people would make up their minds. Either I never talk, I talk too much, and what was I crying about a couple weeks ago, another block, getting deleted, etc. Not to mention, my words are all over the place. “Three Gates, True, Necessary, Kind.”

Monday, July 20, 2020

Gospel 019 ~Three Gates, True, Necessary, Kind~

Hundred And Forty-Six Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I wonder does anyone with so much money live by this rule. For the record, this comes from a grander law. I read once about the things that come out of your mouth. As you can see or hear, most days, I prescribe to the language of the Men In Black.

“Silence your native tongue” MIB

“YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!” – A Few Good Men

Let’s start with the truth. Every conversation we have here is about the non-fiction. Of course, there are things I don’t say and stuff I cannot show. Hell Madam Justice, this is a confession more for Inspector Echo, but let me tell you. I’ve been in juvenile detention once upon a time. Never been to jail as an adult, but I’m like Tom DuBois. I mean, I have no intention of ever seeing a “real” prison because of what I’ve been taught goes on there. People can’t handle my truth, and at times I can’t either. I will instead be silent than utter a lie. Now I do lie but again like Tom, only to save my ass at times. Madam Justice, I spend far too much time adhering to what others think of me; to fight it all though?

“I always tell the truth. Even when I lie.” Scarface

It’s not necessary. I say way too much in the form of making conversation. Remember, when I told everyone that my Grandfather caught the Coronavirus (COVID-19). Did I talk about my little sister being in quarantine too? It was accurate, and people do need to know, judging by the state of the country. Now, what about anything to do with Yabbos or my penis. Both necessary in my life but not in anybody else’s, so what’s left for me? I can talk about my Dæmon. Yep, when everyone’s having babies.

Kindness though? I don’t think I ever wrote this rule down, but it goes like so. Do You: Harm No One. Of course, I see exceptions to that rule as with most. I don’t like to hurt anyone outside of BDSM play or even vanilla. Now that’s too much information, I know Madam Justice. It’s like looking up Cindy Aurum, and next thing you know, she’s in my erotica or porn, I guess. What if I did live by today’s rule? I surely would be a monk, but would I have peace. Well, along with honesty, necessity, and kindness, yes, peace but speaking it? I don’t know how Madam Justice. Three Gates, True, Necessary, Kind.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 012 ~Difference Between Sense And Censor~

If I could write something, like American Beauty or if I had billions of dollars. What about if I catered to the religious, who speak of hated and have holy books full of sex, and hell, it doesn’t make sense to me. Difference Between Sense And Censor

Monday, July 13, 2020

Gospel 012 ~Difference Between Sense And Censor~

Hundred And Forty-Five Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means everyone wants a piece of me, in my wildest dreams. I can imagine someone going over these conversations with a fine-tooth comb. Have I gone too far in a “few” places? I have often enough, though you may have noticed changes here or there. Didn’t I, at one point, just say boobs, breasts, or even dirty mom tits? Thank you, MILF Dos. Now I say “Yabbos” mainly because of Thora Birch and Mena Suvari, which brings me to my point. American Beauty is a good movie… Hol’ Up A Minute?

Okay, there are three ways I want to come at this. First, as I was saying in American Beauty Jane Burnham and Angela Hayes. Thora and Mena, respectively. They play high school girls and Lester Burnham pervs on Angela. Meanwhile, Ricky Fitts gets to film Jane’s Yabbos, which she shows off. Now I can say I like this movie and that makes sense. Now what I’m feeling right this second, that’s me censoring myself. I won’t finish my thoughts, Madam Justice, because what? Am I ashamed, what about what the world teaches, having good sense?

“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.”
― by William Shakespeare, Measure for Measure

That brings me to my big sister. I’ve quoted this often enough that she said, you can’t build a strip club next to a school. I’ve heard killers speak about “no women, no kids.” Madam Justice, you know how I want to live my life. I don’t hide it from anybody. At the end of the day, somehow, I want to become a pornographer. As Dennis Hof did, I want to own brothels. Hell, one day, I want a modeling agency. All of this starts with my writing, though. I want to write everything from something like Wanderlust. To Sex Zombies, Begging For It, Lolita.

There’s that twinge again. Why is it that it makes so much sense to me to stay small? Okay, this is the third thing; I censor everything I am in the name of good taste. I abhor liars Madam Justice which explains why I hate myself, but it’s a lose-lose situation. If I tell the truth, I get blocked. If I lie, I’m in a box because the real me is dead. I know enough to play it safe, but as the song goes AHEM, why can’t I be me.

He doesn’t make sense but Difference Between Sense And Censor.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 007 ~Will Makes It Click~

The first conversation with Inspector Echo of the new year and already I require confession. Well, at least I’m not stealing. I was going to pay Liz Vicious, Cherry, and someone else, but Yabbos are everywhere. Will Makes It Click.

Wednesday, July 8, 2020

Gospel 007 ~Will Makes It Click~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I should own a piece of fine art. My apologies that I still don’t. I mean like any normal heterosexual “teenage” male (What’s My Age Again?). Anyway, I have posters of girls in lingerie. I have a piece from Tony Taka of some Asian beauty with saké. For years I have loved the painting of Fuu, Backwards Beauty from Samurai Champloo. I spoke, of course, about the Tifa Lockhart photo in her Mature Dress. My point is I appreciate the female form, there is nothing more beautiful Inspector Echo.

I’m going Day Nine of NO FAP, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come to breaking. I swear Inspector Echo, I’m trying. If anything, I’m guilty of lying to NaNoWriMo to the tune of two hundred plus words. Hell, I haven’t been working on my novel. This is Lady Sophia’s wheelhouse, but it is also a sin, thus in need of some confession. The next chapter is called “The Aviary, Angel, And Ass,” and it’s Cherry’s sexual past with Father Bridgman. Most nights, I get too damn horny to write, and since I’m trying to avoid MILF Dos and Cherry (snickers). I usually dive into Tifa Lockhart, Aerith Gainsborough, and recently Jessie Rasberry. One more woman I can blame for my downfall or uplifting into the world of the arts. Don’t I like most erotic writers… women?

People don’t whip it out at the Mona Lisa, do they? Yes, Inspector Echo, I’m still keeping my pants on. Now I could become obsessed like I was with Sean Weathers for a time. The movies he was making while cheaply done were something to see. Artists I have discovered:

  1. Nagoonimation
  2. Niisath (Jill Valentine)
  3. JARED999D (Wild Suzi’s Uncontrollable Lust)
  4. Sciamano240 (20.06 PACK)
  5. Fluff Pokémon (Patreon)

Also, some others share videos on several “dubious” sites and, of course, as the song goes AHEM… Girls, Girls, Girls. Do I need to look up the definition of ART? I’m no art connoisseur. As I said, I still have the posters, but my walls are bare here. I will support almost any cause if you put a pair of puppies in front of it if you know what I mean.

I apologize that my fingers are busy, as Shelby (Girlfriend Reviews) says, “Beeping and Booping.” I’m Dee, Dee, Dee, for Yabbos. Will Makes It Click.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 005 ~What Is Hell, Forgetting Yourself~

I avoid mirrors like the “plague,” but that’s because I know who I am like I’m some sort of vampire. I have been called plenty worse, and yet I continue ever forward because, as the song goes, “And I Can’t Help Myself,” but also. What Is Hell, Forgetting Yourself

Monday, July 6, 2020

Gospel 005 ~What Is Hell, Forgetting Yourself~

Hundred And Forty-Forth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and what’s my name? Yesterday I talked about a friend, a good guy that said “the Will thing” is overplayed. Last week I asked the question, could one ever get sick and tired of money. To these things, I will answer. Tell me I could only write things like Gulp, The Safe Word Is, and Miss Someday for the rest of my life. You know I want to be in love, but at the same time, I know what I want out of life. What about ending up like, “Dad?” If I couldn’t be me, Madam Justice, well you’ll see life’s Hell.

Be Yourself, isn’t that what everyone says? My Big Sister told me, you can’t build a strip club by a school. I took her words to heart, and I understand. The thing is, at this stage in the game, I would have to destroy everything, all that I am. My friend, my sister, even Indiana Gone, don’t fully understand the person that I am. Don’t get me started on my “charming” family. Now I have My Dæmon, of course, and he understands my love for him, but what else? Indiana Gone watched “Of Inner Demons” with me, but even she doesn’t know my depravity. Then there are the times I have to pretend, and we all do. Sometimes I think I’m too damn good at it, which explains the Day Job. I then look at those I do care for, and what happens? The Rainbow Girl, MILF Dos, do I have to continue Madam Justice?

Cherry talked about being a stalker, and in a way, I know I’m the same. I told Indiana Gone that I’m the type of guy who will watch a porno flick for the fashion choices. When I watch porn or get off, I have to know everything about a girl, name, age, measurements, etc. It helps with my novels because that’s the only way I’ll ever know them. At the same time, I don’t because I turn them into what the story demands. It should be a Hell worthy trespass to do that. At the same time, forgetting who you are to be what someone needs. Nobody needs me, but they all make me out to be, well, something vile.

I’m going to Hell for plenty, but being remembered honestly? What Is Hell, Forgetting Yourself

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 004 ~You Feel What’s Will~

How are you… I swear I need to put that phrase on the list of my most hated words. Usually, when somebody asks me, I either want to say something with an “F” attached and no, I don’t mean FINE unless it comes with a pretty girl. You Feel What’s Will.

Sunday, July 5, 2020

Gospel 004 ~You Feel What’s Will~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and like my many motivations, let me give you this advice. If you can believe in such, you can have it. Sometimes I don’t know what type of “saying” is worse. Some CONFUSE. How about those that have CONTINUED since forever. No, I would have to say, it’s the ones that you CONCOCT yourself. Let’s be honest though, they all come off as confusing in the end. No one will take you for a PROPHET, a PULITZER prize winner, or a PORNOGRAPHER. The thing is, what you feel in this one moment.

So what brought this on? We’ll get to that in due time, but for now, let’s speak of the wise. Those that talk about being yourself, follow your heart, burn the boats, and other things. How about, in one ear and out the other? You’ll always be one to blame yourself first. These words, spoken by the successful invoke such feelings. Only then, at the same time, your emotions aren’t valid. Your desires are wrong, that’s what they’ll say. It’s all too much that you overwhelm them. Well, how do they expect you feel all the time? I’m repeating myself because you know that they don’t care. It’s one of the reasons, the words “How are you” ring so hollow. Why do they bother asking at all? People pay psychologists, they fund their pornographic passions, hell the police to listen. And you, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 007 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

One out of six, and I want to make excuses for not hearing myself. I know this week you’ll do the same thing. You need your rest, something else will pop-up, the Day Job did its thing and what hmm? You’ll cave to Kendall Kross “The Graduate.” Imagine Momokun or Chelsea “Casting Couch-HD” as Cherry? What about Arielle Ferrera, Gia Steel, Violet Myers even Jade Jantzen? I guess you can see what I’ve been doing with my morning. I had a friend talk about expanding cultural horizons a day or so ago. I’m still missing two girls, but you feel there is something you can do about it. I’ll admit talking to a pornstar. Or drooling over Tifa Lockhart, and Aerith Gainsborough isn’t helping. The point is to feel, that’s what sex does so why not these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 007 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

The money, the power, then the women, now that’s wise so You Feel What’s Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 366 ~The Biggest Willie Ever~

I would have thought my last conversation of three years would be something. I don’t know, spectacular, but it’s past midnight now, which means it’s the anniversary of Will’s Writings, Witticisms, And Wisdom. “The Biggest Willie Ever,” hmm?

Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Log 366 ~The Biggest Willie Ever~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but isn’t that a lie? The closing of the year and today is not a day for lies. Okay, no day is, to be honest. As Tom Bilyeu put it, Every Moment Is a Moment for Courage. So there are three things I will confess as if I hadn’t before SIGH.

First and foremost, I started this blog because a girl called me Skeevy. Now that was the Basic Bitch. Second is the fact that I couldn’t stop writing even if I wanted to. Words Are Power, never forget that. Last is that in three years, what have I accomplished, NOTHING!

If I were one to reread my prior works… No wonder that my editing process sucks. I’ve chased off at least two women, hell three, maybe four. The Rainbow Girl, Okay, MILF Dos, and Cherry. They all sort of blend together these days. There isn’t even a potential on the horizon. I’ve lost quite a bit of money, which reminds me I still need to check with “Adam & Eve” for more submissive clothing. Today would be an excellent day to quit Fapping. I started Sunday, and of course, here I am again with the time travel. How about around this time I said I would have GULP published? I’m still at the dreaded Day Job, which is why I’m here so early. Is this a celebration, I mean Thursday will be the start of year four. Is my writing getting any better, my heart?

Yeah, I’m still making sex jokes, aren’t I? Today is the start date of Camp NaNoWriMo, so am I too tired. If anything, I did show courage today (Monday). I got my haircut. Not as much as I would like, still baby steps. What sort of steps should I be taking here after three years Inspector Echo? I’ve been at my damn Day Job for eight years. I just like the torture, right? However, with you and the girls, I’ve been here almost every day, and 366 days is proof enough of that. I’ve given you the reasons I showed up, so why do I stay after all this time. I don’t know how to shut up? Perhaps there isn’t a big enough apology. SIGH, I am sorry, Inspector Echo. Three years isn’t enough time?

No more room in Hell for The Biggest Willie Ever?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 364 ~A Definition Of Hell, Repetition~

As the song goes, Every day is exactly the same, and if it works for the damned, denounced, and the dead, who am I to disagree? It’s life, it’s the Day Job, the disease, the dystopia which is plenty more fun in books. A Definition Of Hell, Repetition

Monday, June 29, 2020

Log 364 ~A Definition Of Hell, Repetition~

Hundred And Forty-Third Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but can one ever get bored with money? I see dollars, like I see “Dirty Pillows,” as I see dreams. Before I woke up this afternoon, it was my grandmother holding Baby Yoda or a Gremlin. Anyway, let me ask this question, where am I right now? Where was I Sunday morning, Saturday, how about tomorrow? You ask me why I am complaining while having a roof over my head and a bed. At least I woke up on time this afternoon. Today it was Final Fantasy VII Porn and Sex Dolls, yesterday it was more lunch.

Do you get why I say “Another Day” at the Day Job? If anything, that’s a compliment. Every time I walk in, well, congratulations, that’s the worst day of my life. I should finish reading “Too Late” and get back into my motivations. Another Day is me hoping for better. The world isn’t helping, though. I wish I could say something profound and inspirational, but what do we have. Racism at all corners, one more reason to stay inside. Can’t forget about Coronavirus (COVID-19) like other people. The President is in trouble as always. Now that brings me back to porn. The more I attempt to avoid it, the more it finds me, and yeah, at this point, I’m still on day one. I swear I’m going insane, but if I can get past the week. Yeah, I’m laughing too.

I should be thinking about getting past the month with Camp NaNoWriMo. So what will I be writing about for my next novel, can you guess? Brothels, Blood, and the Brotherhood or Fatherhood of a man and his Snoopy. Should I be thinking about the next woman, I’m going to piss off. One more week, and I still haven’t heard from MILF Dos or Cherry. How about if I finally get the courage to call Supercuts before the country goes back into lockdown. What about my boss who hasn’t said anything, so as the song goes, Why Should I Worry? Tonight though, will be more of the same, will it not? A TV Dinner and maybe a Hot Pocket? I’ll watch Snowpiercer because today is still Sunday, so I’m back to time travel. In the end, though, It Doesn’t Matter.

I’m running but not getting nowhere because of this rut? Nearly one more year down. A Definition Of Hell, Repetition

I Will Have No Fear

Log 363 ~And I Will, Tomorrow~

If you ever asked me what I am doing tomorrow, I’ll be in bed. My dream job would involve somebody in bed. Tell me about the good life, and I would want to jump out of bed as much as to climb back in. And I Will, Tomorrow, ha

Sunday, June 28, 2020

Log 363 ~And I Will, Tomorrow~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but you will be tomorrow, won’t you? As long as you’re better at making decisions than I was, say yesterday. Hell, I spent four hours debating between a Piggie Potato, Chicken Tenders, and Pizza. Which one did I choose? A Ham & Cheddar Hot Pocket and a bag of popcorn and why? Because you’ll sit right here at 4 AM saying tomorrow, “And what does that get you—NOTHING.” I wish but congratulations, you’re going to Hell.

Tomorrow you’ll give up FAPPING and what happens? It hasn’t been twenty-four hours, but all you have to do is pick up your phone. See, I like that fear that courses through you, that Paranoia! Cha-Cha-Cha. Better the sweat of your brow than other secretions. Speaking of which, tomorrow you will work for what you want, isn’t that right? Shouldn’t you be writing, and I mean more than us having this petty conversation. Camp NaNoWriMo begins this week, and you would never fail that would you? Yeah, as you would never fail to get up each and every morning. To go to the FREAKING Day Job that you hate because you know tomorrow and the day after, the year, your life. Such a thing you are in Six Impossible Things.

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 032 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM NOT Going To Spend All Week Crying But Making Up…
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late by Colleen Hoover
    Failed

One point, only because you’re still breathing, and I don’t mean easy even in your bed. Tomorrow you’ll get out of bed and walk down to the dining room table? I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry at the thought. Now you would cry over MILF Dos’s Yabbos. Okay, let’s think with the other head, namely the one on top. Will you have the guts to call and get an appointment for a haircut? SIGH, now that’s a grander debate than wanting to order food, isn’t that right? Between getting new boots, your ears lowered. Or buying that Norah Lace French Top and Flutter Tap Panty. It’s not like you’ll have a submissive to wear it anytime soon. I suppose tomorrow you’ll be Emeric Marceaux from Dark Notes, am I right? How about another song? “You’ll find a woman, and you’ll find love.” How about you find out about these Six Impossible Things.

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

In the end, you don’t want to hmm… There’s always another day, and you know what Stephen King said about Hell. That’s still today, so escaping, And I Will, Tomorrow?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 359 ~Willing The Limbo Game~

I don’t play party games, and I’m not much of a dancer, but I’m not crying about Indiana Gone. Well, she did have to deal with some racist jerk. Anyway, how about my game of life tonight? Willing The Limbo Game

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Log 359 ~Willing The Limbo Game~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, as I sink to the lowest denominator when it comes to people. Hell Inspector Echo, Sex gets a worse rap than violence. I could go either or and as always go down even lower. How about being sad, with general disappointment?

Well, let’s start with my favorite subject, can you guess? Sex, my dear Inspector, and did I say I broke NO FAP earlier this week. Yeah, sometime this afternoon even, so tomorrow is going to be lovely? Geez, Inspector Echo, I can’t survive two days now. As THEY say, like people in Hell want ice water. Isn’t that where I’ve been when we start talking about the Day Job. Am I using that as an excuse? I was all “discombobulated” last week and then… people. It’s one thing to think of MILF Dos as an angel, a queen, or a goddess. How I already feel like a slug for doing something, I still don’t know what I did wrong. At least Sex brings me to life. Everyone at the Day Job makes me want to die. So yeah, I go back to bed and wank off to Tifa Lockhart and Aerith Gainsborough; wait until tomorrow.

Speaking of going lower, what’s that “old” meme AHEM, “What Are Those?” I’ve never worried about designer shoes, but to quote a famous Will, “And what the Hell is that smell?” Those would be my boots, Inspector Echo. It’s not like my money situation has my pants falling down. Yes, I know, I still have money to worry about “Yabbos.” How many times have I mentioned Hell tonight? If I were to die, it would be me looking at Yabbos and never touching them for all eternity, always another pair.

Now I’m not planning on dying unfortunately for myself and others. Still, there are some people I hate with everything within me. Only I have their blood in my veins, or I still need a paycheck no matter how small. What about My Dæmon, who I love like pancakes? I’m not the father that I should be ever Inspector Echo. The only good reason I look down is all him. Otherwise, it’s my penis, the putrid smell of my boots, or that person in the mirror I can’t stand seeing.

My apologies Inspector Echo, for my weakness and wastefulness; I’m not Willing The Limbo Game.

I Will Have No Fear