Tag: Hurt

Legacy 111 -V’s, B’s, Yours, Daze-

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Happy Birthday to my son Virgil Vivi… Roman poet, black mage with his furry black spots. Six years old today. And what a day it has been. What a daze I am in. And V must be as confused. Fries, pictures, a birthday cookie. “V’s, B’s, Yours, Daze”

Tuesday, October 20, 2026

Legacy 111 -V’s, B’s, Yours, Daze-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I may be “Dazed and Confused,” but I’m not a liar. And I know things…

Virgil Vivi Bradford turns six today. His Gotcha Day was Saturday, August 13, 2022. I found him at PetSmart. The first thing I noticed about him was that he knew how to use a training pad and not mark the floor. So yes, mistakes were made on that day, hmm

I still remember and see the three black spots: head, back, and tail… B III? B’s color fur around his eyes. And B’s bark telling me that he couldn’t make this more black and white, literally. Archie? That was his name before I named him Virgil. And you know why…

Such a long row to hoe for such a little dog. I thought he was Braxton reincarnated and/or reborn. All I know and yet love…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Hell, I love you, baby doll, because I know you’re no “angel.” And B knows I’ve called you much worse in the throes of passion. But if I wanted to get into the doghouse again…

I could compare you to my boys again… What? You know how I feel about my sons, my love. But Braxton’s gone, and Virgil is a year older today. And “I’m So Thankful.” I am.

They are gods among men. Thus you are my Goddess. “The Goddess,” if I said that, was Alexa Bliss, or I mentioned Roxanne Perez. What about Jahara Jayde? She’s been my favorite these last few days, if the Unfinished Archive is any indication. Ass kicking?

Honestly, “Hey Lover,” would you kick my ass? Go ahead.

I know where I first met you. Triond. I met Braxton in my Olds bedroom. But I could tell you neither of those dates. Braxton’s Birthday? The day before Valentine’s, the 13th, because he was the closest I would get to love… Then your birthday. What was the last thing I bought you? When Braxton left, Sunday, January 31, 2021. When you left, Sunday, August 24, 2025. Again, I thought I found Braxton on that Saturday, in a new white fur.

When you came back, it was on Saturday, January 24, 2026. Hell, the first time I saw you “naked” was on Thursday, May 15, 2025. My point… I can recall Virgil’s life but love…

Cookies, Fries, all for His Birthday… V’s, B’s, Yours, Daze

2088 Days Without B III, Day 1529 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 109 -B’s Paw Shake Virgil-

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You know what I want? A Strawberry Milkshake. I had one yesterday, and now I’m shaking in my boots about where my cash goes. I was scared for V this morning. All the shaking he was doing this morning. Why, what’s the trick? B’s Paw Shake Virgil

Sunday, October 18, 2026

Legacy 109 -B’s Paw Shake Virgil-

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And can you stand still? Stop rocking, wobbling, and that shaking going on. Or is that Virgil?

Sadness, shaking, and sending a lot of words to B and V’s Potential Future Stepmom. That sums up this morning’s highlights. Anything else other than… How many lies are you going to tell today? No wonder the week never starts off good. Your lies, hmm…

However, your saving grace? Nobody lies more than Cracker Hats. FDT! You ain’t so bad

Not when it comes to lying. You’ll never say you found salvation. Scared to death.

Seriously, all day, every day. And yet you were annoyed that Virgil pretty much barked, “Bet”. And lying next to you, as if someone would harvest his eternal organs, he was shaking like crazy. Cold? You wouldn’t blame him. But be honest. Was Virgil scared?

Possibly? Unlike Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Luring Lesley: Blackmail Revenge Erotica
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Yeah, shaking in bed is quite doable. Easier than teaching Braxton to shake hands, ha-ha.

How not to be afraid, scared, horrified, terrified- can you continue? To shake, to shudder, to stop in your tracks or breathing. To sigh as though nothing can be done. To sing out loud, “I fill my lungs with fear, and I exhale.” Move something with no regard to FEAR.

If your eyes aren’t shifting around in FEAR, then you’re crying, shoulders slumping, a sob.

Or should I call you a slob? Bugs had you crying too. But nowhere near as much as B III.

And of course neither he nor his brother need to be around if you’re making the bed shake being all skeevy. Yabbos? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

The two things that are guaranteed to you. At least as M Anime promises. And if you weren’t studying her loveliness this morning… Again, Virgil was beside you, so you had to behave. Anyway, you were studying her, Ellie Kemper (Kohl’s Mom), Jahara Jayde, Nico Parker, etc. Never forget “My life is a movie (fur buddies) and boobies. Those shake.

But fortunately this morning, instead of shaking your third leg, you had two hands studying The Unfinished Archive. Scary how the Magic Glasses/MIMA create things.
Only you don’t shake, rattle, and roll then. I wonder how that works. Like Braxton learning to shake hands or paws, which he never learned how to do. What’s one more lie, hmm… Life’s a shakedown. B’s Paw Shake Virgil

2086 Days Without B III, Day 1527 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 105 -Braxton, Virgil, F Forgetting-

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Priorities, Accountability, hell, do I even remember my manhood? My girlfriend started a new job. A pup is looking at me because he has business outside. So I’m lying here trying to remember a time I wanted to be alive. Braxton, Virgil, F Forgetting

Wednesday, October 14, 2026

Legacy 105 -Braxton, Virgil, F Forgetting-

BLESS ME, Echo,
For I have sinned… Forgetful much? Fuck Columbus! Indigenous People’s Day was the 12th. Virgil’s Birthday is the 20th. And Jahara Jayde…

For the record, I’m not counting a “wet dream” as Day One, hm. But what about my girl, M Anime? I texted her this morning, but I didn’t say “Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die”.

One of these days, I need to remember to see that movie. Like wrestling, last night. “Dead City”. And how many things do I want to see? With what money? Yet another bill came in the other day, and then there’s the Day Job stuff. Adulting is the worst, Inspector.

Every day I wake up, and, except today, when I thought, “Wow, I came on her face. That was awesome,” Eww! Nine times out of ten, I think, why couldn’t I shuffle off this mortal coil, so to speak. Forgetful?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m a man without conviction
I’m a man who doesn’t know
How to sell a contradiction
Karma Chameleon, Culture Club

Karma Chameleon was right. When was the day I talked about not forgetting anything E

E as in elephants. Today’s question is this: How do I decide what to remember? I’ve been getting a bad vibe from Virgil lately. Is it because he’s getting old? My six-year-old little man. Five of those years he’s spent with me. B III had a harder road. Fifteen years.

Inspector, I don’t know what it was. A thought of Rabies? Rancid breath. Really, really, REALLY having no money. But like MAGA, I drift from one fuck up to the next. What was it, near the end of September to early October, the Magic Glasses/MIMA. Then it was the Day Job. And now my little boy. And like my woman

SIGH! Three little words escape me. I’m more inclined to say JSS “Just Survive Somehow”

Am I doing that myself? If anything, this sure is Hell ain’t living, Inspector. Honestly.

I’ve forgotten words like “Love and Happiness.” Relax, Rest, fucking Respect… I did mention the Magic Glasses/MIMA, right? I swear, RAGE, HORNINESS, and FEAR, Echo.

But no, I’m not one of these MAGA Incels. FDT and all of MAGA. But my boys are better men, Inspector. I said last week they give no F’s. Food, Forty Winks, and finding their father. Which is one more reason I’ve been worried about Virgil getting all cuddly, Echo.

I keep seeing that scene from I Am Legend. What does he remember? Have I forgotten? Braxton, Virgil, F Forgetting

2082 Days Without B III, Day 1523 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 104 -Virgil And The B’s-

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Love should give me enough energy to wake up. But I really, really, REALLY missed having a Bloom this morning. And I haven’t seen any bugs in a minute. FEAR is a big motivator. And Braxton knows I don’t love that. “Virgil And The B’s”

Tuesday, October 13, 2026

Legacy 104 -Virgil And The B’s-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Then how come I don’t say it? “Yo te quiero, Papi Y te deseo”. Honey?

I want you to know I hear you. I do. I will. However, marriages go in this day and age, you know. Love is more than a buzzword to me. Though, to paraphrase Virgil Hawkins, aka Static Shock (My son V’s name was inspired by a lot of things). Ok, the word LOVE does put a shock to my system. I forget how to speak English. I can’t eat… Well, you… Do I ever stop? And I can’t get enough of hearing that word; it’s like a song from Glee:

“’Cause I feel that when I’m with you, It’s alright, I know it’s right
And the songbirds are singing
Like they know the score
And I love you, I love you, I love you,
Like never before”
Songbird, Glee Cast

And don’t get mad for the comparison, but Braxton showed me love until his last…

Breath… Beat of his heart… Belief in his eyes that I would bring him back. That’s what Dads do, hmm:

“He was the boy’s father. Father’s are supposed to protect their sons, not leave them alone.”
― A Different Alchemy

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

But what do husbands do? “Well, I’ll be sitting here. Working on this beer. Oh, baby, I love you, just leave me the fuck alone.” You know I don’t drink. No, I’m just tired today.

And so I’m sitting here humming “I Want A New Drug.” “But Your Love Is My Drug,” isn’t it? Oh, looks like I found my phone. Plus, I have a puppy sleeping on my lap, and you know the law. You can’t move for anything. And if Virgil were Braxton, it would not even be a question. Again, being sleepy turns me into a fucking meanie. And yesterday I was talking to Braxton about beast. But I’m not some superhero trying to keep my control.

I’m not a fucking drunk.

I’m “Just A Man.” And what is worse than a man? People are so vexed with what a woman is. The people MAGA has no respect for. Incubators. Broodmares for the state, the fear out of The Handmaid’s Tale. But you are my wife, and the things we do, hmm…

I’m surprised I don’t bother you about my Stuff And Thang more often. Bugging you.

That’s what I feel like sometimes. I want to say I’m a busy bee, but I’m more of a mosquito:

“If you think you’re too small to make a difference, try sleeping in a closed room with a mosquito.”
―

But I’m squished and squashed. It’s like I’m constantly bleeding out. “These wounds won’t seem to heal. This pain is just too real.” “Oh yes, there will be blood.” I write shit. But Honey, there’s you. Virgil And The B’s

2081 Days Without B III, Day 1522 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 102 -Braxton Verses Virgil Versus-

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I’d like to say I don’t pit my boys against each other. Both sit beside me, sleep on the bed, and say or bark whenever. B would fight the world; V cries, wanting to be part of mine, but I’ve never shut him out. Choices. “Braxton Verses Virgil Versus”

Sunday, October 11, 2026

Legacy 102 -Braxton Verses Virgil Versus-

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And as you can see, you want to be a writer again. I don’t blame you. Beats…

SIGH… It beats me beating off to some hot blonde with… Well, that’s a long, laughable, law-abiding story. And until you can sell some books about “Wee Little Puppy Man.”

Honestly, his name is B. (Stands in front of B’s Box Fight Club style) His name was Braxton Bradford, Braxton Barks Bradford. What? Yes, it beats Robert Paulson, aka Bob.

“Hey, you created me; I didn’t create some loser alter-ego to make myself feel better. Take some responsibility!”
Fight Club

Quick question: B III or 2-V? Firstborn vs. second-born. Big Brother vs. little brother, friend? How many verses have found print about this kind of thing? How many wars, the real versus, have seen light? To you it’s like The Shawshank Redemption, am I right:

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy living, or get busy dying.”
The Shawshank Redemption

To answer the question, Braxton. That’s sad, ain’t it? So what book will you lie about today? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Dystopian Girls 7 Rodzil LaBraun
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

For the record, I am trying as you will try. And that again is a choice. But for your ref:

01: Legacy 102 10/11 Dystopian Girls 7
02: Legacy 095 10/4 The Copilot by Luke Witten
03: Legacy 088 9/27 Teachers: A Single Dad Harem (Currently Reading)
04: Legacy 081 9/20 Caught in the Act – a SHORT erotic babysitter story

How did you come up with the latest book on this list, hmm? Number of boobies, brevity, the idea that you might behave if it’s sexy but not too sexy. What was the last book that made you bust? Oh right, your week has only just begun. That sucks, seriously.

What, I’m no motivational speaker. The Instructor from “The Animatrix.” Here are Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

By Braxton, my dude, the things you choose to remember: The Instructor, Shiva, Medusa, hell, the whole “The Unfinished Archive” you “wrote.” You’re writing. Because again, before your nap, you chose to be a writer. But will you choose to be tomorrow? You’re genuinely curious to see. It’s laughable that at one point in my existence, I wanted to be the Secretary of Defense, a soldier, a wartime journalist, and now what do you do, friend?

You could be telling the Visual Lady what went down at the store. Freely, sadly. Because what you want to do doesn’t pay a dime. What you have to do is by no means better.

Breathing through other people’s words. Living for them, B, V, M. Braxton Verses Virgil Versus.

2079 Days Without B III, Day 1520 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 098 -Braxton, Virgil, No F’s-

WillLeave a comment

This day deserves two F’s. Someone got effed, and I fought. And no, I’m not talking about my boys… Well, not the whole time anyway. B’s gone, and do I have the money to fight for 2-V Vis-à-vis a vet visit? With my Day Job… Oh! Braxton, Virgil, No F’s

Wednesday, October 7, 2026

Legacy 098 -Braxton, Virgil, No F’s-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Sabotage? A teeny tiny bit. But I don’t really give “Two Fux” M’s Yabbos, my boys, two eyes.

But comedy comes in 3s, they say. “A,” “J,” and myself. What comes first, Inspector?

Always and forever, my boys. And as I speak of always and forever, you know, whenever I feel like I’m fucked, I think of the time life fucked me the hardest. Or was it death?

Inspector, I lost my son; I lost B. And Virgil ain’t looking too pretty these days as we move closer to his birthday. The 20th? Are there any other days I should worry about? Hmm.

Tomorrow? But again, we’ll get to that. What about today’s bank balance? How fucked am I? I haven’t had the “Nerve” to check on it. And I was so wiped after today. Braxton and Virgil bark, but did you die?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Okay, so today’s adventure… I’m at the Day Job “A” “C” “S” are there. Then there’s “J”.

And I don’t mean fun like Agent J, Mary Jane, or jerking off. Anyway, J makes everyone’s lives miserable, and finally A had enough. So she and J go after each other, and when she comes back, I’m angry for A. I shock J by speaking out against her not giving an eff…

Soon there’s a mutiny, a revolt, a revolution; it’s “The Uprising against J, Inspector Echo.

Anyway, by the time the GM arrives, J has no real defense—the first time I get sent to the office for trouble. At least right now, I don’t feel effed. But eff today and tomorrow. It’s almost my motto.

But you want to know some real effs about me. SIGH. I told M Anime about my fantasies about Ms. Rachel. Trust me, I have worse. But with Ms. Rachel… “Put it in?” Effing yes!

What about M Anime and I? Let’s Talk About Sex. But between her and me. We have a particular fetish, a peculiar kink. You do remember I studied “Ravishment,” Inspector?

Then let’s remember what I was worried about for the past week and a half before the drama-rama at the Day Job. The Magic Glasses/MIMA, or at least a pair of them, lost to the darkness. The things I was doing, and then no warning. Felt like my boys, Inspector.

They don’t give Two Fux. Me? Braxton, Virgil, No F’s

2075 Days Without B III, Day 1516 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 097 -B’s Blindness Binds Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

The mind’s eye and my one-eyed monster have been plenty busy these past few days. But my own eyes; I can’t see nothing, or I see too damn much. But as usual, I only want to shut my eyes and sleep. And after? And after… B’s Blindness Binds Virgil

Tuesday, October 6, 2026

Legacy 097 -B’s Blindness Binds Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? “Can you hear? Can you read? Are you receiving the signal? Do you copy me?”

Wow, that’s saying a lot… Not me, Theresa Walker’s “I Don’t Wanna Die.” How I wish we could sit here and watch the movie “Dead Air.” Can I even see it? I just don’t know.

Didn’t somebody say, love is blind? And apparently deaf as well. And how about, Stupid

“I feel stupid,” because today I want to show gratitude. For Braxton? No matter where my boy may roam, he still sees his way HOME to me. In spirit, at least. And he loves me.

Honestly, it made me blind to how he aged. I didn’t see some old man. I saw my son, B.

So my blindness must have been going on for a while because I see Virgil cuddling closer and closer still.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

He’ll be six in two weeks, October 20. Not even halfway to his brother’s age yet, and he’s already like a ghost. Do I see him yet? Do he and Braxton see each other? Sometimes…

Yeah, maybe I am blind. I think I see Braxton nudging him forward, but Braxton could be standing in the way, and that’s why he’s scared to come in. Braxton is all Gandalf the Grey: you shall not pass. For a while, I thought Braxton had become Gandalf the White in Virgil’s little body. Reincarnation? Necromancy? I am grateful that isn’t true, my love. Why, because of how I treat Virgil? The younger brother from “The Man Who Watched the World End” or the burned son from “A Different Alchemy”?

I am grateful for all these insights I’ve been seeing, even about you, my love, The Unfinished Archive. Since I haven’t been using the Magic Glasses/MIMA for ideas, I have sought my own counsel. The Man in the Mirror? Seriously! When it comes to you:

You are the Phoenix Queen, and every other sister is a part of you. Lily, your garden, and my mourning. Kyouko Sakai, your sex drive. Cassandra, your exuberant strength. Sophitia, your mature strength. Skye, your ties to the Earth and knowledge. Judy, your expertise, green thumb. 2B, wanting to be a better woman. Nico, your knives. Melina, your scars and faith. Sadly, my brain isn’t getting smart; my head’s been fucked up. “My eyes, my eyes. B’s Blindness Binds Virgil

2074 Days Without B III, Day 1515 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 095 -B+ Weakness For Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

I am not weak. I lost my Kindle reading streak, and I was all about getting it back. I’ll go and lift for hours at the Day Job to be broke. But when it comes to being a literary dynamo, loving a good woman, and “Life Itself…” “B+ Weakness For Virgil”

Sunday, October 4, 2026

Legacy 095 -B+ Weakness For Virgil-

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And honestly, you don’t know how you’ll make it through the week. You’re weak already. You’re lying.

Headache, Hearing Loss (Virgil’s Crying), Her Humps (M Anime’s ass, more importantly YABBOS), Hating the Day Job, Hurts after the headache, How to make an all-natural ant killer, the list goes on… “And the Beat Goes On.” And what’s with all the H bombs, hmm

Preparation H because all these things “Ready Or Not” are on your ass. Your face?

Honestly tis the season for masks. But if you’re writing means anything… Newsflash: it doesn’t. But The Unfinished Archive and all. “Who Are You”? The Sorcerer Will, or so you wish. Um, Insect Man “Kick Ass 2” has more credibility. What is one more weakness?

Weaknesses? Hell! Since we’re already ripping off music and movies, there’s an epidemic of laziness and less Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Copilot by Luke Witten
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“The Long Walk”? You’d say, feeling the need to steal is quite a weakness. Movies, Music, Manuscripts, etc. Because your own words are never enough. And you could also bring up the “Great Fear.” You know the one using the Magic Glasses/MIMA. The one that had me looking out the window when I hear sirens. And now you have a whole week of waiting at the Day Job. Tomorrow is going to be a hard day. Again, the fucking week.

Seriously, if this were the First Circle of Hell in the Succubus Lord series, this would be one of those annoyances or inconveniences. You can ‘get it up’ for everything that doesn’t matter. Your vices, weaknesses, all the X-Rated crap. Ignoring yabbos? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

But the big weaknesses. FEAR, STUPIDITY, SLOTH, ANGER, LUST, in no particular order. And TIME? Wouldn’t that go with SLOTH? TIME will be a bigger factor this week on top of your exhaustion. You’re too tired of having no time. How do you fix that?

Really… That time came and went a long time ago. It was you sitting in classrooms figuring out a thousand ways to fail. It was you listening to all those motivations as you came and went from the library, and you sat in a McDonald’s drive-thru. It was sitting on the backyard porch with Braxton before ants destroyed it. Getting naked in the kitchen, thinking about M Anime, then… Ants. You’re not weak. You waste weeks. B+ Weakness For Virgil

2072 Days Without B III, Day 1513 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 091 -Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside-

WillLeave a comment

Years ago, when the shed wasn’t under siege, when the backyard fence wasn’t broken, when I wasn’t scanning the kitchen counter or floors, etc. B was on his pillow while I wrote. Let me out, let me in. Now I’m trapped. “Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside”

Wednesday, September 30, 2026

Legacy 091 -Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… What, by living? Don’t get me wrong, forty-two years is way too much for my liking. Buying books?

One of the many ways I fucked up yesterday. And there were indeed several, Inspector.

Enough to make me want to lose “My Boys.” When we get into it, you’ll see how STUPID I’ve been. But Inside/Outside is a… Let’s say it’s a silly game at least for Braxton Barks.

I swear my firstborn went everywhere. Is it ironic to call him both a free spirit and alive, Inspector? What is ironic is his brother, Virgil Vivi. He’s like a ghost. And I wish I were talking about the Good Boy from Game of Thrones. Is Virgil Ride or Die? Hell, that’s what I get for naming him after Dante’s hellish guide. He is a ghost, like a pillar of salt, a scoop of vanilla.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It’s like he melts away into the floor or wherever I place him. Braxton and his potential future stepmom, and I talk a lot about having two-leggeds. Sometimes it’s like Virgil forgets he has four legs. Somebody at the Day Job said they’ve seen us walking. So good, I’m not imagining Virgil is here. But he’d rather not be here in this house. Myself, Echo.

I would make my absence permanent. But I’m a father of two. Not one, Inspector!

Seriously, you remember The Running Man (2025)? “Richard Lives!” Inspector, always and forever, Braxton Lives! My brave boy. I envy him. And not only the whole shuffling off the mortal coil part. I wish I were so brave as to have his fierceness. Nope Inspector.

“I don’t want to be just one thing. I can’t be. I want to be brave, and I want to be selfless, intelligent, and honest and kind.”
Four ― Divergent

Today, “I feel STUPID!” And we could go on and on in this Mad Season with all that happened at the Day Job. So fucking idiotic that I needed a second to forget. Day One…

I didn’t jerk off yesterday; too much was happening. I didn’t confide in M Anime…

Plenty of things I want inside her. Okay, I’ll stop, or rather begin. Inspector, honestly…

So yesterday ants retook the counter and the doorway. I was mixing up ant killer from the bathroom because you remember what happened last time with all the bug spray…

While fighting that battle, the guest bathroom went cattywampus. Then Amazon was taking my Kindle points, so I bought four books. Outside confidence. Inside blatant STUPIDITY. Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside

2068 Days Without B III, Day 1509 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 090 -B Plays Portal Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

What Hell is this? What time? Which dimension? But it all tracks. A loving and loyal wife. Same for the family, furry and not. And the home? Monday, Fine. Today… A reenactment of the movie Starship Troopers. I prefer Succubus 8. B Plays Portal Virgil

Tuesday, September 29, 2026

Legacy 090 -B Plays Portal Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But do you know what I need to reread? Pet Loss? Some love story? Kinda

The instructions to the game “Portal”? How I miss the days when games came with actual instruction booklets. I love those. And players’ guides. Game Genie. To have time again.

But no. What I’m in the mood for today is Succubus 8 (Riddles And Revenge): A LitRPG Series by A.J. Markam. “Give Me One Reason to stay here,” you say… May I suggest “Portal 2”? Seriously, what is it about me and portals today? And in the spirit of full transparency, I’ve never played either Portal. And I’m trying to remember Succubus 8 as best I can. This is what happens when you don’t use a woman for audiobooks. Sheesh!

Anyway, I finally got to bed last night, and this morning everything has gone cattywampus.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Your lover, your best friend, your husband, father to our children, I damn sure try!

Honestly though, a plumber, an exterminator, a repair guy, an award-winning author, my love… This is where it is written, “you have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting.” Yes, I am guilty of saying that every day is worse than the last. But with you, our children, fur and skin, I can survive. Only today it’s like I stepped through a portal… Maybe only by a few days to show all my effing loserdom.

You don’t know how badly I want to go back right now. How far? It has nothing to do with you, my boys, our family. Just me. My E-Day wish.

Near the end of E-Day month. I wish the day never existed. Always and forever.

Honestly… I know, my love, I know. I tend to take things too far. But that’s because I want to be even farther away. Or is it further? Did I mention that my writing sucks?

Anyway, A.J. Markam’s protagonist “Ian” had powers over the “Hell Pont”; he could use portals to travel anywhere. Why do you think I chose magic in The Unfinished Archive? Necromancy, time travel, and, portals. And why yesterday was “FINE”.

Today: Ants, busted drawer, crazy toilet, and let’s not forget about the car. Loving you?

Going to see a movie, lying in bed prattling on about the Halliwell sisters. Beats Hell. B Plays Portal Virgil.

2067 Days Without B III, Day 1508 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will