Monday, June 15, 2020

Log 350 ~You Can’t Hide Truth Forever~

Hundred And Forty-First Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I have a stomachache, but both result in the same thing. Madam Justice, I am one sick individual. I’m also a man full of many contradictions. As Romeo put it, sad hours seem long, and at the same time, here I am, time-traveling and for what?

It’s still Sunday, but I’m trying to outrun my tears. Hell, if I didn’t freak MILF Dos out before um, I am now. It’s like noticing I screwed up today’s rule, “You Can’t Hide The Truth Forever” (six words instead of five). Anyway I know you’re not Inspector Echo or Dirty Diana. Why do I need to give a confession or an indulgence of my sin? Five stages of grief? As always, I am not a Christian. I quote songs often like Behead The Kings, but I know my Bible, Justice.

“I’m a man of god but I don’t need a savior”

“so don’t be brave, have a little common sense” Behead the Kings by Outerspace

“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

So I will speak my sins, these truths, and who knows, by the time I reach MILF Dos, I may understand what I did wrong.

The D: Now, if anything, I should say the F as I failed plenty because of her. A brunette I met in high school and wrote a lot about in college. That is until I almost ended up in Cell Block D. I was listening to my D. Two Dads, hers and mine almost killed me for my writing. I dropped out of school because I no longer had the dollars. Last I checked The D’s a happily married mom, with some little monsters too.

Sweetness: a young Latina on Youtube. People a long time ago, know I was smitten with her, obsessed. I made videos about her, a blog, hell half of my poetry collection. She put me down easy, though, and I discovered how quickly and effortless it was to destroy my work. Can you say, STALKER Much?

The Harmonic War: I swear this is my greatest shame. I’m sure she would tell you all about it, but I couldn’t even read it myself. I lost a ton of friends for that. To this very day, though, I know TTB and Teen Starlet. I have been led to Russia, and I pay $20.00 a month for Vault Girls.

All That Jazz: She’s a step above The Harmonic War and Sweetness. I won’t tell you where I met her, but all you need to know is I didn’t have the stones to ask her out properly. I gave her a note and put one on her car. Higher powers got involved, and I nearly lost everything. I’ve seen pretty girls in the same place. I’ll never again risk it.

Basic Bitch: I’m angry at her now, but still, it was all my fault. She was another brunette and a divorced one at that. Commenting on her blog, I learned I talked too much. I won’t even go there now. She gave me one of my most “useful” words… SKEEVY. Okay, did take my side.

Rainbow Girl: A lesson from the Basic Bitch. God, I hate sounding like Trump, but “Be Nice.” I tried Madam Justice honest. I named her Rainbow Girl on account of her hair, and after one of my favorite book characters from the Fever Series. One night she brought up butterflies, and I sent Butterfree from Pokémon. She quoted the song “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored,” and I came back with Crazy Town’s Butterfly. I asked her out twice before this (through text). You know what happened next, BLOCKED.

Okay: A young brunette, all of them have been brunettes or dark hair. (I don’t recall The Harmonic War, but I wasn’t trying anything with her). She was my maid once but more, a good friend. As Positive K put it, “What’s your man got to do with me?” Okay, she’s technically MILF Uno. One day she was supposed to come by and said she couldn’t, and we haven’t talked since. I wasn’t blocked by her. Still, there’s no reason to bother. She’s getting married too and is quite happy.

Cherry: A twenty-three-year-old vixen from across the pond. If we talked about women I had to lie to, she was one I was honest with. Yeah, I wanted to see her naked, and we spoke every day. It’s been about a month since I sent her pieces of my novel. I wrote about her and her mom and, of course, haven’t heard anything back. She likes a post every once and a while, but we don’t speak these days anymore.

MILF Dos: Again, I’m not sure about The Harmonic War, but MILF Dos is the oldest on this list. We met through TIBU and have many mutual connections. About a year ago when she needed money I offered her a deal which worked quite well… yabbos. She went into modeling then stopped. MILF Dos wanted more money, and I was so scared to ask, but I took the leap. We came to an arrangement, and I was over the moon. Now she gave me back my cash because she wanted to deliver first, so no worries. Until Saturday, June 13, I’m lying here in bed, hand in my pants, looking over messages she sent and bam, BLOCKED. Thus my spiral.

Now, what did I do wrong, hmm? I checked in on her earlier in the day with a message. She posted something about being out of work. I responded about my anxiety and being out of work this week myself. I don’t understand, but the moment I realized I went back and commented where I knew she would see it. I was begging her and apologizing, for I don’t know what. The thing is, what do all these women have in common, well besides being unfortunate in ever meeting me.

Of nine again, eight of them were brunettes. Two of them were minorities, All That Jazz was Mixed, and Sweetness was yes a Latina. Only one isn’t American, and that’s Cherry being a Brit. Seven were teens to twenties. Sweetness being the youngest seventeen… Five I have met face to face, the other four all online. Four have blocked me outright. Sweetness is gone, The D I’ve never sent a request. Okay, and Cherry are friends everywhere, and The Harmonic War is on Instagram still. I know you’re telling me right now, Madam Justice, that I’ve lost the mission. What about the rule? I’m telling the truth, I’m not hiding it, I remember. Only I can’t for the life of me put my finger on what I did wrong Saturday.

A part of me doesn’t want to know because chances are I’ll hate myself even more than I do right now. Does Milf Dos think I’m a stalker? Did some secret get out, and then the question becomes which? I could have said something, but what did I do all that night? There’s always the idea that I did nothing but be myself. Yeah, I’m disgusting. Do I need more reasons to consider posting this everywhere? Yeah, letting everyone else decide? I CAN’T BE ME. You Can’t Hide Truth Forever.

I Will Have No Fear