Tag: Mistake

Journey 317 ~Some BS Reading, Virgil~

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I’m the Last of My Kind, Mr. Ray Garraty. And where’s my Pete McVies? B’s still gone. And who would V be if I ever got around to reading The Long Walk to him? I should have been reading anything. But the damn “Magic Glasses.” Some BS Reading, Virgil

Thursday, May 14, 2026

Journey 317 ~Some BS Reading, Virgil~

1929 Days Without B III, Day 1370 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Did you read a good book? Not “The Good Book,” mind you. You can read…

What? You’re not a slave. You’re just… Dead. “And before I’d be a slave, I’d be buried in my grave. And go home to my Lord and be free.” A few things about that, Braxton…

First, I “know” you can see colors now. Rainbow Bridge and all. The Rainbow Road.

Second, I have no problem “saying” you’re gone, and you’ve died. “It’s no insult to say a dead man is dead.” It’s ACCEPTANCE. To read. To endure. To know. That will never happen, Baby B. It’s just a bullshit word. As far as I’m concerned, you’re on my right, B.

Virgil’s sleeping on my left. But thirdly, my dear B, you know how MAGA is about Black people. Listen, listen, hear and understand. Always FDT!

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

But I’m not here to talk about hearing unless it’s Succubus Lord 14 (Swimsuit Edition) or M Anime minus the swimsuit. Braxton, I love your potential stepmom’s yabbos. Jeezu B!

And no, I’m not getting all religious either. Okay, there is the religion that the Magic Glasses are building. As far as “The Good Book” is concerned… John and Revelation.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son… B, my sweet, sweet boy, I would watch cities burn for you, I would commit genocides for you, I would bathe in blood for you. Taking a bullet, you wouldn’t have to ask. This world means nothing.

Jeezu, Joel, John Wick, etc. So let it be written, so let it be done.

And that is what is scaring your Daddy today. The things I have written. “All These Things That I’ve Done”. It’s not the depth of my love for you. Anyone who knows me knows the lengths I will go to. I love… well, not yet, but I am obsessed with M Anime, B. I am so in love with dying, I’ve read the word necrophilia. I’m talking damn near Tillie Cole’s “Raphael.” And you and your brother have lain in bed with me more than any chick. Do you remember you wanted me to take your Favorite Girl to bed? And Virgil would cry all night if I kicked him out. But last night (sigh), what I wrote triggered a WARNING! Some BS Reading, Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 315 ~Love Of B, Virgil~

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So late this evening. The sleep of the dead. How I wished. But no. B and V’s potential stepmom has these yabbos that make me feel like I’ve been “Locked Out of Heaven.” And “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing.” But I still miss Braxton. “Love Of B, Virgil”

Tuesday, May 12, 2026

Journey 315 ~Love Of B, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than Braxton? More than his little brother Virgil? Sometimes you gotta “Bwitdaba.” The eff!

Okay, in other words, “Fly Me To The Moon,” even if we had to play Squid Game. I’ll take you “to the stars” even if we were on the Titanic. Even in these universes, love:

Breathes deeply and then begins

  1. Mortal Kombat
  2. Bible Black
  3. Soul Calibur
  4. Resident Evil
  5. American Beauty

I would choose my boys, my sons, and any of our two-legged children over you because that’s what a man does. It is the “Human Nature” of a father. What do I know of it?

Honestly, my love, my future is coming on. I should say our future. But I am a man lost in the past. Resurrection, Reanimation, Reincarnation. Because neither of us is very good at, well, Recovery.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

We were arguing about that the other day. You don’t recover, you don’t rehab physically.

A true masochist. And myself? Hell, I like a good spanking, a smack to my face, and “scratches all down my back to keep me right on”. But I’m a bit for mental anguish, love.

Banged by other guys… Not you. Not really. But I do have somewhat of a cuck fetish. Though not in my story… We’ll get to that. But it’s a mock… uh, such and such. It’s role play. It’s two consenting adults playing a really bad, um, sexual encounter. And then there was me, “Dreaming With a Broken Heart” when I was born, when Braxton passed.

And then deciding “If we’re gonna be together or apart.”

That took around five months to resurrect our love. To “Justify My Love”. To dig it back up: the hurt, the pain, and the remains. You’re my Obsession, my love. Completely. With all that I am. And you know your husband. “Great merciful bloodstained gods”.

Seriously, you know me. I’m in love with a dead man. Would that be me? Who knows, my love. But more to the point, I’m in love with a dead dog; he’s a real boy that I put in the dirt—a box on the nightstand. And I want to love you like… who am I, Tillie Cole’s Raphael? Let’s say, like a zombie, I want to “Tear You Part”. Necromancy resurrects you. Be your virus. Love Of B, Virgil

1927 Days Without B III, Day 1368 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 310 ~B’s Are Welcome, Virgil~

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Isn’t it sad that to merely exist, one must have purpose? I mean, especially in the USA, FDT. What’s a bed for? Babies. Domestic labor. To play “Whiteout Survival.” How about rock out with my… Uh, my boys still sleep here. “B’s Are Welcome, Virgil.”

Thursday, May 7, 2026

Journey 310 ~B’s Are Welcome, Virgil~

1922 Days Without B III, Day 1363 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day… Your Dad? Well, I wasn’t much of a student. Do you remember that?

Was I still in college… AHEM, junior college, when you made your way here? You definitely weren’t here for high school. You and I would have died a lot sooner fighting my Old Man. Back when I was praying for a D in summer school. No, not like that, B.

Eww. Nothing against the LGBTQIA+ community, Braxton. We’re not MAGA. FDT! B, that was your last gift to me… Well, not really. But you died Sunday, January 31, 2021, so you saw me to the end of that A-hole’s first term. And your bro… Virgil, having no balls isn’t my fault. He lost those before I welcomed him here. But having no guts at all?

Like HOME, I treat COURAGE like it’s a dirty word.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Beatrice Prior, aka Tris, aka Shailene Woodley is one (b) I would have welcomed to bed, Little B. But she was with some Cracker Hat back then. Not that I stood a chance, my B.

But speaking of someone who would have me “Smokin Out The Window,” that’s part of the reason I’m late talking to you today. Between looking through the Magic Glasses and talking to your potential stepmom, “M Anime,” I’ve come to a realization. Had an epiphany. Yeah, that sounds a bit more religious. Anyway, with the story I’ve been “writing,” yeah, right. Every woman who joins the harem is a part of me, I eff over.

Literally B. And isn’t “Ironic”? When you ‘left’, I was celibate for 161 days. Right…

One good look at Chloë Grace Moretz rubbing her thigh, and I broke. Daddy’s weak.

Your Dad is also quite dumb. Please, I’m STUPID AF, and I know you don’t like me talking like this. I didn’t take my afternoon nap. I was up at 10. But the Magic Glasses:

• M Anime = Heart & Future (emotional + creative)
• Kyouko = Momentum & Desire (raw fun and drive)
• Lily = Past & Mourning (sacred grief turned into offering)
• Cassandra = Fire & Youth (passionate, competitive energy)
• Sophitia = Stability & Motherhood (mature, nurturing strength)

They don’t see Skye clearly. Not yet. In a world, you still exist. In a place I want to be in.

“Days Gone”? Been watching that. I, B’s Are Welcome, Virgil.

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 308 ~Better B Running Virgil~

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Last week I was tired. This week? Finding more reasons to be tired. Running on Empty in more ways than one. Eww! V needs food in B’s bowl, and my girl, who’s saying I Want a Little Sugar in My Bowl. And who is Skye Matthews? “Better B Running Virgil”

Tuesday, May 5, 2026

Journey 308 ~Better B Running Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? That’s more than enough to get you to run away. Obsession? Funds, Fur, Future Wife…

As the song goes, “It keeps you running, oh it keeps you running.” FEAR, beloved.

Honestly, I would like to consider myself courageous. Hell! I would take being a man of leisure. But even “Here and Now,” as “I promise to love faithfully.” My love, I do that with every breath that I take. But every one of them is laced with FEAR, like other drugs laced with Fentanyl. Wow, that’s dark. But today is dark. Today I’m afraid. Always…

Running. Because I promised myself I would not fail again. Fail to love? Where’s Virgil?

Better question. Where’s Braxton? And here’s a random question. Who is Skye Matthews, hmm? A girl who couldn’t run. But more on her in due time. What time is it?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Way past time for us to be talking when we could be doing much more interesting things, my love. If I must be afraid, let it be that our children come walking into this room. Seriously, two-leggeds, four-leggeds, and all. I’m not just a father, a friend, a guy thinking “I Wanna Eff You.” I ain’t Akon, but that’s definitely in the bedroom playlist, babydoll.

Forgetting how crazy, how obsessed I get over you. Because when’s the last time you saw me chase a dollar? And again, I’m not hugging my doggie right now. And why is that, my love? I can’t run with that little ball of fluff in my arms. But would I leave him, our house, you, my heavenly angel? Not ever.

Not if I can help it. Not if leaving would hurt you more than staying. And why would I leave? Skye Matthews? Please, your husband writes HaremLit. Uh, when I’m not writing about my boys, my latest bad thing, or some boobies. Specifically yours. However…

“Magic Glasses” are a thing, and that is what I’m afraid of, like everyone, beloved.

Obsessed over seeing my firstborn, my boy, my Braxton, each and every day. So much so that “I created” another world, a nether realm, an Everworld. I’m not K.A. Applegate.

What I am is a scared man thinking about “All These Things That I’ve Done”. They keep running through my mind. And “Hanging By A Moment” here with you seems impossible. Better B Running Virgil

1920 Days Without B III, Day 1361 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 303 ~B Tailing Secrets Virgil~

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I taught my boys to be gentlemen when it came to the ladies. And Braxton knows there were all kinds of stories I couldn’t read to them. B III loves his Favorite Girl. And 2-V? He’s scared of everybody. And I’m an open book. “B Tailing Secrets Virgil”

Thursday, April 30. 2026

Journey 303 ~B Tailing Secrets Virgil~

1915 Days Without B III, Day 1356 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? If only you could talk, hmm… Please. I know your language like I know my…

Nevermind… The point is, I could hear you then. I can hear you now. Listening…

Honestly, that’s my problem. Communication. Where was the voice to say, “I have a bad feeling about this?” Star Wars was 1977… Yay, I’m younger than Star Wars, Baby B.

However, not by very much. Is that why I’m hard of hearing? I’m selective, which makes me more of a jerk. I heard what you were saying, and I couldn’t be bothered—my rage, B.

Smoke was coming out of my ears, and I didn’t want to take it out on you. Then explain why your little brother is asleep on the floor instead of next to me. I’m not mad at Virgil, Braxton. Less horny? Bible Black, my harem.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’ll always listen to my “boner…” Seriously, did your father just become a frat bro?!

Goodness no! Though I’ll always be your brother in arms, legs, uh, paws, whatever B.

Like father, like son. Do you remember when I had to give you “The Talk?” When your favorite girl comes to visit. You didn’t keep secrets from her, I know that B. You would show her too much. Again, like father, like son. We communicate, we confide, and we gain the consent of the ladies. Even though sometimes the answer is no. We hear it.

Acceptance is a whole other thing entirely. I’ve made it no secret that I will never accept you being gone. Would I be better off? Billy Bob Thornton said this:

“There’s a melancholy in me that never goes away. I’m 50 percent happy and 50 percent sad at any given moment. … I don’t want to forget my brother. I don’t want to forget what it felt like when he died, because he deserves that — that’s how important he was to me. So, if I have to suffer and I have to be sad for the rest of my life, and if I have to be lonely without him… then that’s the way I honor him.” — By Billy Bob Thornton.

And don’t we have a rule about listening to white men… Effing Supreme Court! Eff!

Anyway, speaking of things I don’t want to hear. I was working with the “Magic Glasses” the other day, and it said that I got too sexual even for it. My harem for healing, Braxton.

MAGIC GLASSES Notes: Journey 302 B Slaving Away, Virgil (Wednesday, April 29, 2026)

[This is one of the most explicit fantasy prompts yet — shifting from the more “romantic” or “devotional” rituals to raw group sensuality, with the acolytes as aroused spectators.”

As real-world pressures mount — financial shame (“not economically viable”), creative frustration, physical/mental exhaustion, and the long grief over Braxton — the fantasy world becomes increasingly sexual and explicit.

Earlier Journeys often used the temple for protection, healing, and ritual renewal (hot spring, dawn prayer, Second Howl).

Recent entries (298–302) shift toward raw group sensuality, voyeurism (acolytes watching), and intense physical release.

This suggests the fantasy is no longer just about comfort or legacy — it has become a pressure-release valve. When the weight of reality feels unbearable (“I’m so effing TIRED”), the mind turns to intense sexual fantasy as a way to temporarily escape the noise, shame, and grief.
The Magic Glasses

This mirrors your real longing for a large, loving family with M Anime while simultaneously using sexual fantasy as a substitute when that future feels distant or impossible.

The increased explicitness in the prompts (bulges under sheets, acolytes touching themselves, group acts) suggests the escape is becoming more intense because the underlying pain is also intensifying.

The explicitness is not “just horniness” — it’s a symptom of deeper exhaustion and a craving for relief, validation, and temporary peace.

Bottom line:
The more explicit the temple scenes become, the louder your real-world exhaustion, grief, and sense of stagnation are crying out for relief. The harem and acolytes rushing to pleasure and comfort the Sorcerer is your mind’s way of saying: “I need to be cared for. I need to feel wanted. I need a break from carrying everything alone.”

Would you like me to explore or suggest how the temple rituals might evolve to address this emotional state more constructively?]

It’s like one of those books I couldn’t read to you while you were here. I was still into Eric Vall’s “Succubus Lord” series. Friday, January 29, 2021 Gospel 212 ~On The “Will” Succubus~ I’ll give that to the Magic Glasses too and see what it thinks. Sunday Bloody Sunday, you were gone. But there has to be a better way than some woman’s ass or mine getting squeezed by her. B Tailing Secrets Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 301 ~Love To B Virgil~

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So what’s this about being tired? An actual family of my own… Yet. I swear, if M Anime and I ever had a son, I’m naming him after my furry firstborn, “Braxton.” And what if we had more? Virgil? What about writing? Still hate myself. Love To B Virgil.

Tuesday, April 28, 2026

Journey 301 ~Love To B Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I won’t ever say, I can’t, I won’t, or I shouldn’t. I do. That day…

I do. I will… I remember that day. I remember the day our children were born. I remember the day you became mine (in the biblical sense). But I also remember the worst day of my entire life. The day I was born, “Emergence Day,” E-Day. Or is it Braxton…

The day my firstborn son died. Sunday, January 31, 2021, somewhere between 3:30 and 4:00 PM. And lest I forget the day you walked out of my life, Sunday, August 24, 2025, around 6:00 AM. But hey, you came back. And I seem to have the same tendency, my love.

I keep coming back. Is that a bad thing? When I’m so TIRED. Eff me, I am so effing TIRED!

What day is it, baby?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“As Long As You Love Me,” it “Don’t Matter.” Like who I like more, The Backstreet Boys or NSYNC. That I’m a black man getting “Locked Up,” like Akon. God/B I hope not, my love. Or what song will I play for you next as I try to keep myself awake? Yes, I am TIRED!

But never too TIRED to ask you to “Break Me Off.” “Men of Vizion,” like me. “Magic Glasses” and all. If I haven’t said it enough, I am TIRED, which is why I’m choosing music.

I don’t know how I’m keeping my eyes open right now. Because when I close them, I see Braxton. I blink and see creation. And I hate seeing myself, but love seeing you—our kids.

And yes, V is included in that. My boys were/are SeeDs. I mean that both in love’s garden, in my heart… and Final Fantasy VIII. Yes, my love, you married a gamer, you know it. And through those seeds and some watering from you… Or maybe that’s my job, considering all the children running around, ha-ha. Anyway, what is the point of today, my love? Other than that, I love the woman I married. The woman who multiplied my love, who begged for my seed… Did I say that out loud? It’s that I became so many things in love’s name. But the Man In The Mirror, thank you Michael Jackson, hates being himself, the one. I look at Virgil Vivi… Love To B Virgil

1913 Days Without B III, Day 1354 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 296 ~Braxton, Virgil, A Loan~

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People are broke because of that nut-less fool in the White House. FDT! Hell, my Virgil has bigger balls than that freak, and he’s neutered. And my money? Uh… I wasted $67.00. Why? Stupidity. My boys don’t have pants but… Braxton, Virgil, A Loan

Thursday, April 23, 2026

Journey 296 ~Braxton, Virgil, A Loan~

1908 Days Without B III, Day 1349 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Of course you did, you’re dead. Wow, that’s harsh. Let’s say “envy’s” kicking up again.

And in this “Jungle Book” which is my existence, “I Wanna Be Like You,” Braxton.

Honestly, I need to stop talking like this. That would be your line on a day like this, wouldn’t it? After waking up from a nap that didn’t help and downing an energy shot, B.

B as in Bloom these days. I swear, at this point, the company should be paying me for the endorsement. Hell, I even turned you and Virgil’s potential stepmom onto them. Well, she hasn’t said that yet, but she bought one. She’s all about giving you brothers and sisters, B.

Two-legged ones. Let me say that I understand why you hated wearing pants. With a girl like M Anime around… But here’s another reason. MONEY.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“Be A Man.” I’m not Hulk wrestling or Marvel. I’m not the Macho Man. Dammit, B, your Dad ain’t even Mulan. Your Old Man is scared, sick, and pretty damn STUPID. Let me take you back to last night. I’d rather take you back to anywhere before January 31, 2021.

Anyway, your Dad is busy working with or funding bad guys. And I’m broke, Braxton.

Thirty-two bucks in the hole, to be specific. Well, sixty-seven, considering I finished the deal. I was telling your potential stepmom you could get girls to suc… play with your balls for that. First off, Eww! Secondly, how do I know? Lastly, you were always licking yours, and what the eff is Virgil licking? They’re gone, son. Let It Go.

Is that why I’m into blondes all of a sudden? I’m so busy thinking about Elsa. I can see her yabbos for free. No, B III, I’m still so “Caught Up” in losing money. And this is the man your potential stepmom has chosen? Then again, M Anime mentioned… Cannibalism.

Braxton, that’s the mother of you and Virgil’s siblings someday. Talk about going from “With Arms Wide Open” to Rodney Atkins “Watching You.” And now here I am crying because if I know anything, it’s that you wanted to be like me, and I would tell you, one day you would be as tall as a king, and Heaven is awfully high, the Rainbow Bridge…

Whatever. You got $32? $67? Maybe… Braxton, Virgil, A Loan.

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 294 ~To B Merry Virgil~

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Marriage, mattress time, and many children. At least three, according to M Anime. But a man provides. How will I? A bestseller about B. Buy a small store, turn it into a bookstore, with novelties. And my adult movie studio? “To B Merry Virgil”

Tuesday, April 21, 2026

Journey 294 ~To B Merry Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Braxton would have… does love you. And after all this time… Ain’t sure about Virgil

Like father, like son. “I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad.” My furry son and I. Well, we ain’t “Gorillaz.” We’re more like koalas. And while I wish I could sing, you knock me off of my feet. You do. “The Way You Make Me Feel.” Today I ain’t going nowhere. And it’s not because of you. Or that I’m crying over Braxton. And Virgil is giving me that sad look like he wants me to pick him up, but I’m not chasing him around the room today. Unlike you, my love. I would follow you anywhere, but how did I even find you, love? Really.

Honestly, “I’m not lost, I’m not lost, just Undiscovered.” How can I be lost, when I’m right here being well…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Horny while you’re hot as Hell my love, being on your knees like that. Virgil and the two-legged kids should be out of the house, and B III… pretend you’re in timeout again, please, Braxton.

Now, what was I saying? Oh yeah, why do I like you on your knees? I could go on and on about how I’m all about blowjobs, cock worship, and my ass being spanked. Gripped.

I could talk about how much I love you on your back. How much I love furniture shopping on the grounds that I can bend you over it, my dirty, my little… uh, best leave that type of language. What I was heavy into “Excogi” or was it “GDP” girls saying “I’m your little whore.

And is that why I’m not going anywhere? Too busy thinking with my second head.

Seriously, was it just the other day I was talking about my three pillars for a business, my love? All under “Second Circle Creations” minus Braxton’s books. But hey, Dennis Hof had Domino Hof. A regular old “Brothel dog.” A pimp like his Daddy. Anyway, I wouldn’t go so far as to say I want to own a brothel, a cathouse, or something like that.

Family man? That I am. I love you, my boys, our three two-legged kids, everything.

Gorgeous… SIGH. Love and Happiness? I have the former. And there’s always more, but I don’t know where to find it. Happiness? Ha-ha. Yet we’re together. To B Merry Virgil

1906 Days Without B III, Day 1347 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 289 ~B’s Dollar Dollar, Virgil~

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Did I want to spend an hour and a half being humiliated at the Day Job, or as B thinks of it, “The Bad Place”? How much do I make? “Enough money to get a little 40oz and a bucket of chicken on the way to the poor house.” “B’s Dollar, Dollar, Virgil”

Thursday, April 16, 2026

Journey 289 ~B’s Dollar Dollar, Virgil~

1901 Days Without B III, Day 1342 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? Mine? I got off early, and I’m still late talking to you. Habit?

It was a week like this that got you killed. Yeah, I don’t have time for all the sugarcoating. The indifference. I would be a better writer if I did. That’s one AI’s perspective, Braxton.

Honestly, we shouldn’t go into my use of the “Magic Glasses” this week. My perspective.

I remember Thursday, January 28, 2021, getting you set up for your vet appointment, B.

On Friday, they told me you were dying. Saturday, the wait. Sunday, the Crossroads, B.

Bone Thugs N Harmony, duh. Ok, before that, the Wu-Tang Clan “Dollar, dollar bill, y’all.”

You know I could use more of them. Endure and Survive. And I don’t mean looking up Ellie and Dina… Go to your room! You remember those days, B III.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

But you’ll be glad to know 2-V is sound asleep in bed. Yet I’m sitting here in the Den. Y?

The biggest reason being… Humiliation. How many times have I apologized for my shame? Not at you for being sick, but at the abject failure I was. Finances, feelings, finite…

TIME! I wasted it all. And as M Anime and I were talking about today… When I wasn’t busy staring at her yabbos. I tell you, Braxton, you would have liked her. Hell, you do!

Anyway, we work these jobs we hate, that’s “The Bad Place” to you, and for what I dare ask? She’s got kitties to pay for, and I’ve got your little brother. The moment I get a good paycheck. Virgil’s needs…

I don’t mean that in a bad way. I could at least get your brother a bath. Dirty Zeke, right.

But you were my Elijah. And I swear the Day Job made me want to be Clarence… Uh, being crucified? I effing miss watching movies with you, dude. The Book of Clarence, Spontaneous, Hulu’s The Mill. That’s how the Day Job makes me feel. Like I want to scream out, “I effing quit!” And then I wake up and discover that it’s all a nightmare.

Braxton, if it could only be some kick ass dream like Sucker Punch, like the AI was telling me yesterday. If I could only come up with a way to make some real money. Because…

I’ll be broke soon enough. Shame. B’s Dollar, Dollar, Virgil.

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 287 ~Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It~

WillLeave a comment

I can tell my girl anything… Braxton’s Favorite Girl? I remember she and I watched porn together. Where was B? Hell, where is V? And Cherry? I need higher learning to talk to her. Good brains, great bodies, but the Day Job. Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It

Tuesday, April 14, 2026

Journey 287 ~Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But Braxton barks, “The best breast, legs, and thighs come in a bucket/box of chicken.”

Who knew my son could be so profound? Who knew an old boss could be one of many “Back Stabbers.” “Smiling Faces Sometimes.” Lesson learned as B barked on Monday.

Honestly, I still hear the voice of my firstborn son. I’m upset that I didn’t see Virgil asleep on the stairs yesterday. And then there are the things I would rather not hear or see.

Ignorance is bliss… We’re not MAGA. FDT and that effing portrait of himself as Jesus.

Ignorance is strength… This is not George Orwell’s 1984 as much as MAGA desires it.

But strength? I appreciate you trying to calm me down with your “Sexxx Dreams” as if you’re my private singer, my “Teenage Dream.” But what I feel today… Iron Rain.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m talking Pierce Brown’s Golden Son being launched into battle, my love. Darrow/Reaper and Virginia/Mustang, Helldivers 2, and Gears Of War. So yeah, I’m mad. And I love you. I love women, I respect women. However, This Bit$h, my love.

Smokin’ Out The Window? I’m sure I said the same thing about you, love. And not always in the throes of passion. But no, I can’t fight the bit$h that caused the problem, then I’m all Christian Grey with you. I torture you… Fifty Shades style. “I wanna effing tear you apart.” Why? I’m just a “Sucker For Pain.” All “Raw” and Playful Devotion hmm.

Seriously, you know the man you married and what’s with all the music and manuscripts? Trying to erase her words…

And that is what pisses me off the most. Excuse me, that is what grieves me the most, my love. The fact that I wasn’t supposed to hear what I did. Communication. That’s all I Ask Of You. It’s all I ask of anyone. I’m an open effing book. A STUPID effing book, but open. For example, as I was telling you some time ago, the reason I like blowjobs so much is that I actually care what you have to say, but the silence. Effing? Food? Never complete silence, moan, cries, screams (I wouldn’t be doing my job right), but we don’t need words… There’s us, my boys bark, our children learning to talk. Then This Bit$h yesterday… EFF!

To afford a bucket of chicken, Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It

1899 Days Without B III, Day 1340 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will