Gospel 104 ~Will At First Sight~

Last week I said something like, love will find me because I ain’t looking for it. If anything, I’m looking at the clock after I took too long of a nap. As I ask the question, what is there to see. “Will At First Sight.”

Tuesday, October 13, 2020

Gospel 104 ~Will At First Sight~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but all I see is you. Crowns cost money. A halo shouldn’t cost anything. Of course, all my hoodies have sentimental value. Is this my way of saying I like my baby’s shine? “Well, sometimes I just can’t believe you’re mine.” To me, you are divine. Yeah, I haven’t been in a poetic mood for quite some time because I would instead study you. You know as I keep my ears open to every song (minus gospel), and all my pop culture references. Baby girl, “can’t take my eyes off you.”

Let’s say I did, and not for sleep. It’s my act of faith, hope, and love. So I ask you, do you trust me. Is that why I ask baby doll, “let me share this whole new world with you.” As long as I close my eyes and know that you’re beside me always, but you are my dream, love. Only I’m awake now, and when we first got together, well. Besides wanting the voice to sing this, “If I had one wish?” Ok, I’m going to be selfish, but I’ve always wanted a surprise party. You know how I am about E-Day, but that’s because nobody cares but you. Strangely enough, this is coming from a man that hates not being in control. Only to hear you ask me to close my eyes and when I open them to know. “Maybe, I’m amazed,” but with you, I always am.

The fact remains that even now, I still close my eyes when I pass by mirrors. Well, unless I get hurt or something. Today I checked out my ear because it got clocked by some camera rigging (my wishful thinking). Yet when I see you checking me out, well damn. When the day comes… no, I won’t even give voice to that understanding. My eyes will be full of tears. Yes, I know, I’m a broken record when I talk my eyes, his, but My Love, Your Eyes? Knowing that I’m no less of a man, that I can be, well, anything when we’re together. Now THEY say love is blind, and I’m not sure if I agree or not. It’s only the way I see you in my words, how every night you’re a starry-eyed surprise, how we are counting stars and dog hair.

Loving Will At First Sight.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 148 ~An Eye For Will~

Again not a word about NaNoWriMo, but I will finish on time; if only I loved writing as much as I love my job, yeah I hat the place, but I need it and speaking of which what about love, well I still have my dæmon. An Eye For Will.

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

Log 148 ~An Eye For Will~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that means I have eyes everywhere. First and foremost, I want to write books; you know that My Love. To this day, I still hate that saying about a picture being worth so many words. However, I want to study photography. I want to make movies. Before I met you, though, I loved other things, and I don’t want to offend you or creep you out. Too late, am I right? Only you know I believe the dead will walk the Earth. I know I was fearful of the Day Job. Of course, I love My Dæmon like pancakes always.

Now, as the song goes, I only have eyes for you. How about can’t take my eyes off of you, baby girl. I don’t lie My Love, again I’m not the type of man who can, I don’t know. Yes, I live in the moment, I can focus, when I look at you there’s only us. What I’m thinking is I want to love you, like I did my old job. Yes, I hate the Day Job, well the people but I was always there. Should I love you the way, My Dæmon loves his walks. When he missed one, I’ll admit I was frightened. Let me love you like I do my writing, which is every single day without fail. Oh, to love you like I do my DVR because I’m always saving every little thing important. You would have me love you like my pillow, because where am I right now, that’s sad.

Now another bit of faith I have is that love should be an obsession. With everything I love, I learn everything I can. When you understand something, it can’t hurt you ever. Today I was thinking about how I look at things. It reminded me of something out of “Prayers For Bobby.” When he was sad and miserable, his head hung low. His mother took it as a good thing. If he showed confidence or happiness, his mother was displeased. Yes, I know he was gay, not where I’m going with this, no worries. My point was when I was shy, scared, and sullen, people “loved” me ha. So I raised my head, I smiled, I studied, hope I wasn’t staring. Still, people got scared.

Only you’re not afraid ever, wow An Eye For Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 144 ~Get No Satisfaction, Will~

I can get plenty of food, especially today and I am grateful, my little boy and I aren’t fighting, and the little pests have all found destruction, still a speck here or there but my anxiety & desire… my sweet buttery Jesus. Get No Satisfaction Will

Thursday, November 22, 2018

Episode 144 ~Get No Satisfaction, Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
How To Make One Million Dollars, don’t pay for what’s in the middle, no you never pay for the pussy, hearts should never know brokenness, barter, or a price, you don’t look to afford what goes between her lips, comes out of them, or anything to break the silence. Well I didn’t make a million, but I did save with Thanksgiving dinner arriving today, that’s probably something better to be thankful for honestly, my belly is full, my dog is comfortable, and while my motivations say that my comfort zone is my enemy, I’m Feeling Good.

So why aren’t I satisfied, why do I not seek out satisfaction besides Rule 009 “Satisfaction, The Death Of Desire” by the time I have everything I could want I might as well be dead, but I wake up to the teasing every single morning. You remember how I said that when I return to the house, I have fifteen minutes to decompress, to make it as though the day didn’t happen after that I don’t I have to live with anything. Depending on how that goes I either feel an overwhelming sense of shame or clarity of mind, both I find right after a Fapping session, and that is not anything to pure satisfaction.

Not like for “Pay Two Plague” you do remember my NaNoWriMo novel, oh how I would find teasing for writing it but my characters are straight to the point, over 129 ways to satisfy themselves… I am a greedy S.O.B. aren’t I? Even writing and yes this is more Lady Sophia’s thing, but there’s foreplay, I blah the actual sex, and then the aftermath is usually quite the bombshell. I swear I am not good at a one-night stand as the song goes or maybe I don’t believe there is one girl out there that could see all of me and eye all of her through the Eyes of Grace.

Hello and Goodbye, Before and After, it’s the middle that always gets me, the present, one more reason I might dream of the end of the world because when there is nowhere left to go then, I don’t have to ask her to Stay With Me. Like father like son, “B III” isn’t getting any either so what can I tell him, I’m Stuck In The Middle With You right, but a guy can still dream of a great many wants, but at the end of the day admittedly I Can’t Get No Satisfaction, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 137 ~An Eye Of Will~

Eyeing my next line, whether it be my finances, the ant invasion, or that sliver of sleep I get before all of a sudden it’s morning again but for now thank goodness the only girls I’m seeing are in my novel. “An Eye Of Will.”

Thursday, November 15, 2018

Episode 137 ~An Eye Of Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
How To Make One Million Dollars, don’t blow all your money on the holidays, Halloween’s long gone and Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Christmas, hell I know enough not to waste money buying porn… well, I know that now. Still I wrote witches into my story, and currently, I’m incorporating Alycia Debnam-Carey, Lexi Ainsworth, and Haley Pullos into my novel, apologies ladies, I have a thing for brunettes and Brown Eyed Girl, (I’m aware Alycia has green eyes.)

 

I need something beautiful to look at, well someone, yes the words of my current title are plenty ugly, but I have seen far worse this past couple of days, the death of a great artist R.I.P. Stan Lee, too few hours of sleep, and I swear if I see one more line of ants. Don’t think I’m going to be in the black this year even if I finish my “Harem Erotica” I’m sure I’ve told someone that on more than one occasion, these days are blurring together, but there’s always “Just Another” girl in the morning. Not that “B III” is giving up his spot in the bed anytime soon and I’m sure his dearest human is bugging the hell out of him.

Sex is something that keeps my eyes wide open, but I suppose you have witnessed these past few weeks that all I want to do is close them, let’s meet in the middle and say Eyes Wide Shut” in a way. All my dirty talk which is pretty moronic despite the plethora of Erotica I read I store for “Pay Two Plague” which very few people have had a “positive” opinion of, I swear if Trump can say “grab ’em by the pussy” how horrible am I? I suppose you could ask The MILF, Eileen Kelly, and Angie Varona, more apologies ladies, if only my fantasies outnumber my problems tonight.

I did finish writing sooner than expected but 5-hour ENERGY plus an Adrenaline rush, so many legs and I want to put them all to bed, but “D-Spray” isn’t something you can pick up from the store. Neither are girls like this, I swear Dirty Diana, we’ve gone from brunettes to girls with black hair and now Sabrina Nichole, no I’m not drunk but probably all kinds of high on fucking fumes… had to justify that warning somehow, to keep going An Eye Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 341 ~Peeping John, Dick, Willy~

Sometimes I feel like I’m not writing, but I am merely a spectator, I guess what I saw today is still processing so I let another eye on this, you know the one, and he hasn’t anything better to do these days. Peeping John, Dick, Willy.

Thursday, June 7, 2018

Lesson 341 ~Peeping John, Dick, Willy~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again, well if they did Quasimodo, and Lenny Levine (Just Looking) then maybe I can buy myself some absolution as well after all love is a beautiful thing, and so is destruction? Now let me preface this by saying I’m not suggesting anything illegal, though let’s be honest where were you on the day of “The Fappening” and how about these past days *cough* Amanda Seyfried *cough*.

Don’t we all love a love story, why exactly were women going to see “Magic Mike,” what made “Fifty Shades Of Grey” a big hit, why is pornography one of the cornerstones of the Internet? Is it a lack of creativity on our part, could it be merely the beauty to somehow take part in or maybe it’s jealousy which clearly shows through; might it be dreaming the impossible dream. Hell, I have a picture of a naked MILF I would choose over any stripper or porn star, and here I was about to say the realness or maybe the forbidden nature of owning such.

“Why don’t they ever a make a movie about what happens after they kiss?” Jamie

“They do, it’s called porn.” Dylan, Friends with Benefits (2011)

Sad perhaps but isn’t that how we do everything nowadays, a screen, the glass, doors, walls, everything in-between. Only such a thing is meant to be private, and then we head into fetish territory. I’ve read enough erotic novels to be that hidden camera, the paparazzi, the fly on the wall, and if I had a girl to keep for myself would I suddenly put down all the books, turn off my computer, hell I would want her reading and watching too. Sometimes I would consider myself an exhibitionist… I’m not going to bother trying to defend that, but if it sits better with some I would like to be one of those couples into PDA, hand holding, kissing, dirty words and so much more.

“It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t “see” none.” ― Snoop Dogg, feat. Nate Dogg, Kurupt, Warren G, Ain’t No Fun (If The Homies Can’t Have None) Doggystyle (1993)

Maybe it’s the fact that death has become so commonplace and yet we have to hide love and affection, we treat it as taboo and forbidden, and you know how I usually land right on one of those extremes, sex, and violence. It’s a shared intimacy for those who dare, some of my favorites being that scene in Sex Zombies by S. Wolf when the characters were hiding in the closet or “Lingerie” when Lacey watched Jason and Vanessa fuck.

It’s Only Love,” and yes people are entitled to keep it all for themselves, I’ll be the same way “no touching” but the feeling I get “Somebody’s Watching Me,” anyway well Peeping John, Dick, Willy.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 315 ~Open Your Eyes Cyclops~

I still have years left to work if everything does its part, and today it was my eyes, to think that I might be suffering from a lack of sleep or maybe I’m just getting old; could I be developing mutant powers? “Open Your Eyes Cyclops”

Saturday, May 12, 2018

Lesson 315 ~Open Your Eyes Cyclops~

Hey Lady Lu,
Can You Love Me Again, because I don’t know, I haven’t looked in the mirror since Thursday really; being I’m my own worst critic, but I don’t have body issues, for the most part. Let me say that Thursday was eye-opening in a way, which is the concept for today’s lesson, despite everything; sight is not something to be taken for granted as we live in a beautiful world but “Don’t Panic” I will behave Lady Luna.

Honestly, I have no choice in that regard, well I do, but that’s just it right, I’ve said men would do anything when it comes to women that they’ll never see naked. To be honest, I’ve seen her naked just not in the flesh, but it did help with the manscaping and not. No more dreams, good ones anyway because other than last night I haven’t been sleeping much, my head was pounding and my eyes; not much scares me physically but blindness, I couldn’t do. My son is doing better on sleep, but just this morning he was looking for me and passed right by twice, I’ve said before I will be his seeing eye man if he needs me, and with taking care of him, there is so much to see my friend.

Now I know I usually see through one eye in particular, like “Okay” asking me what is it with me and brunettes. Honestly, I still don’t know; when I was a kid it was Asian girls for example “Tram-Anh Tran” a.k.a. Tina Nguyen on Ghostwriter. During middle school and through high school, it was mostly Caucasians with an African-American woman squeaking by every now and again. For a month or so I was all Wakanda Forever… does that make me racist now that I’m back to brunettes and yet there is so much beauty in the world, though women are best you have to admit?

My favorite “Colors” are black and red but just looking at my lost little boy today as he walked by, well I already like brunettes, so tan, beige, brown is just a given, between his beige fur and brown eyed girls. Maybe today I just wanted to appreciate my “Hungry Eyes,” and it beats being angry all the time “The Red” that usually takes over, so I should just enjoy today, but yeah I’m staring into a world of “Black Or White,” both with writing.

Black and white, will lead to green and gold, which will lead to red, and then “Back In Black,” and why not go and enjoy “Mr. Blue Sky,” today or tomorrow, Open Your Eyes
Cyclops.

“There’s a saying — the pessimist looks down and hits his head.
The optimist looks up and loses his footing.
The realist looks forward and adjusts his path accordingly.” ― The Walking Dead, The Well

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 241 ~The World Sees Me~

If I could only see the way you love me, everything might be solved right; you want to switch eyes… okay so not a horror movie but a love story, or maybe beer goggles, or am I just a piece of meat, I could live with that. The World Sees Me.

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Lesson 241 ~The World Sees Me~

Dear Future Wife,
I’m Not Afraid Anymore, or I suppose I won’t be sooner or later, there won’t be any more to see and if there is I won’t spend a few hours trying to change it… message. It’s a man’s world I know it, and you worry about how the world will see you and so do I, the only difference is, to me, you are the world, knights and their shining armor, right?

Not after we slay the dragons, suffer the slings and arrows, and I spend so much time polishing and hell the first time you saw me I was probably in my hoody so why bother dressing to the nines then or now? Unquestionably because my mom wouldn’t have it any other way; my mother, my sister, women in general and no it can’t be our sleeping angel in her room, a man has to be better for himself. My love if I told you about the battles I have with the man in the mirror, and then you look at me; if you only knew how long I’ve been looking for you and when I finally found you, before then?

“You make me want to be a better man.” ― As Good as It Gets

Love can’t tell time; I heard that in a movie too, and before I met you, as I imagined the woman that you surely aren’t I had an epiphany, what if you could see me now? I even made a playlist full of songs about eyes, watching, the look of love, brown eyed girl, your eyes, and that’s just it, I know what I must look like now but back then I was worried about my face. Maybe I was hiding, and there are some things I can’t hide even if I wanted to, so that’s when I began thinking perhaps I should pretend that every day would be the day I would find you.

Let’s just say you kept me from doing more stupid stuff before we ever met and now well as the song goes, what makes a monster and what makes a man, and I cam only imagine who I am and what I am in your eyes. Bedroom eyes, those hungry eyes, those ocean eyes, I should know what makes you cry, other than certain movies and those Sarah Mclachlan commercials

So I will continue to wonder, I’m sorry, I can’t help it hopefully the future on the horizon is much grander than the past that t lies behind us, the black and white on some blog The World Sees Me.

I Will Have No Fear

Pupil Pushed

Pupil pushed
Rolled into the skull
How I am bushed
This life a lull
Why bother a look
A word made dull

Blind to the kind
Was there ever such a thing?
So sublime
Look at me
And talk about kindness
Somewhere lost in the dark
Such is blindness
A breaking… that’s my heart

Blind in line
The back of someone’s head
When will it be my time?
I heard everything you said
Stay inside
No life to create
Outside
And so I wait

Blind to the time
The past I can’t forget
The future I can’t find
And what of the present
Today and tomorrow
What I have found
Sad hours follow
Tears threaten to drown

Blind in the divine
Can you see God?
Or only the blind
The mob
Leading the blind
Darkness mistook for light
Chained and tied
This isn’t right

Blind to what is mine
Which is nothing
So I don’t buy your lies
But to own something
To touch, to feel
If only to see
And I know it’s real
Yet I can’t even see me

So let my eyes roll
Be pushed to see lies
How am I to know?
I’m not the only one who’s blind

Copyright © 2011, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Atlas Meets Just another Girl

It’s probably much easier for Atlas and he just lets it roll off his back, probably was just as easy for her not that she ever knew and even if she did. “Atlas Meets Just another Girl”, I can’t fix the world but I’m an expert at fixing my heart…

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vmo7qfAlf1U

And if I give my eyes a break
… no, I better stay awake
For if I close my eyes, it’s easier to pretend
I’ll ever see you again
But ain’t love blind
That was my first mistake
I’m just out to find

“It” crushed, the sky descends
As even God thinks you’re so divine
Your boyfriend knows you’re fine
So I want you, easy as pie, a piece of cake

Just excuses like “I’m out of pencil lead”
All I need is the air that I breathe, but instead
Can I get a vowel, maybe even two?
All I needed was I and U
If only it wasn’t for that break in the center
Something we will never make
Well not together *sigh* whatever

Love me like you do
Which I guess, just means never
Will I put my heart back together?
Maybe it will take

until the bed frame shakes
Or heart and ache
Is broken too
Three little words too many, too few
So what if Atlas drops the world
How did my heart break?
Beautiful, powerful, not just another girl

Only you

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired By: Babydoll a.k.a. Emily Browning… Sucker Punch, Lenny Kravitz “Again”, Five For Fighting “Superman” (It’s Not Easy)”, The Hollies “The Air That I Breathe”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, Seether Ft. Amy Lee “Broken”, Major Lazer ft. Ellie Goulding and Tarrus Riley “Powerful”, Pete Yorn “Just Another”, and Yazoo “Only You”

Piece in the Universe

The universe is made of such much but we are not gods; I would like to think we are more for making love and that takes two… with a few “accessories”. “Piece in the Universe”, but I want to be more and I’ll need more or should I pull myself together

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4E9tuugnJy4

Three little words but only “you”…

And no other
As I pick a flower or two
Just you’re more elusive than a four leaf clover
But it’s not over
They’ll be more, tomorrow too
One more day and another
The birds and bees have reasons

Yet this wallflower cannot flatter
Does it even matter?
My confession

When you’re right here…and so great is my fear
that I no longer care for the man in the mirror
Skipped heart beats, but I’m breathing once again
Like humpty dumpty can I pretend?
Beautiful girl you draw nearer
Fall… you’re close than you appear
While I think of you “indecent”

Things I wish were true
That you will love me love me like you do
Make me your selection

Let me be your one and only
for a moment in your eyes
My heart you’ve already stolen
maybe broken
If only I was brave enough to try
To make the universe less lonely
Two pieces

Making three little words
Am I sure
You and me, quite a reflection

Of love…

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired By: Kaori Maejima… Shusaku, Yazoo “Only You”, Daughtry “It’s Not Over”, Michael Jackson “Smooth Criminal”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, Glee Cast “Let Me Love You (Glee Cast Version)” Mario, and Peter Gabriel “In Your Eyes”