Tag: Breathing

Legacy 092 -B’s For Breathing, Virgil-

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Out of sight, out of mind. But in sleep, I’m still breathing. As I slept, an angel watched over me—my B. Now, as I shut my eyes tightly, I imagine his beautiful stepmom, my girlfriend. But I’m awake; I breathe; I’m scared. “B’s For Breathing, Virgil”

Thursday, October 1, 2026

Legacy 092 -B’s For Breathing, Virgil-

2069 Days Without B III, Day 1510 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? Your brother is alive. M Anime wants to have my babies. No banging…

I mean, on the door, of course, B III. Not the cops/FBI, not my Old Man, or anyone I owe.

Yet… I smile? No B. “I feel STUPID.” Your Dad is a “Savage,” ask M Anime. Eww! You don’t need to know that. But for the most part, your Daddy is scared. Fuck! What now?

“The horror! The horror!”
Kurtz

Language! I know, Baby B. I wouldn’t want to scare Virgil. Hell, we’re both terrified.

Braxton, why must your Dad live in this constant state of FEAR? No germ, contagion, disease, virus, or plague is as inane, insidious, infectious, and insane as FEAR. Uh, HATRED and STUPIDITY would like to bark in here. But today B III there is FEAR.

Braxton, I need one of those waking up seeing you…

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

Breaths… That’s what I didn’t tell your Potential Future Stepmom this morning. I damn well might have been happy every afternoon after the Bad Place. I would nap, and then when I woke up, There You’ll Be. Talk about without the presence of FEAR, Braxton.

Your Potential Future Stepmom has that power too. Again, I was talking to her this morning, and when I lose the ability to think, ONLY breathe, I’m uttering every OBSCENITY, and the words “Oh yeah” seem boring, but everything is OKAY. And why is that? Because M Anime has a perfect set of yabbos but was marveling at Angie Griffin’s

And isn’t that why I’m in trouble? Not with her…

I was “Barely Breathing” when M Anime and I were apart. But she’s been nearly this whole year. And speaking of this whole year, now I’m scared again. Stalking FEAR…

That I do Braxton, every day I need to find something else to scare me. And here I was thinking that once I escaped Emergence month. What? Would October be less terrifying, hmm? Yesterday B was for bugs, bug spray, broken house things (toilet), and buying cleaning supplies, with what, a couple of hundred bucks. Banging, Breaking, boys in blue

I hope not, because who would see to your brother? I beg, I give my blessing, I believe your brother won’t be afraid someday. I can’t tell myself that because I know the man, the boy I am. Braxton, M Anime… B’s For Breathing, Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 091 -Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside-

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Years ago, when the shed wasn’t under siege, when the backyard fence wasn’t broken, when I wasn’t scanning the kitchen counter or floors, etc. B was on his pillow while I wrote. Let me out, let me in. Now I’m trapped. “Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside”

Wednesday, September 30, 2026

Legacy 091 -Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… What, by living? Don’t get me wrong, forty-two years is way too much for my liking. Buying books?

One of the many ways I fucked up yesterday. And there were indeed several, Inspector.

Enough to make me want to lose “My Boys.” When we get into it, you’ll see how STUPID I’ve been. But Inside/Outside is a… Let’s say it’s a silly game at least for Braxton Barks.

I swear my firstborn went everywhere. Is it ironic to call him both a free spirit and alive, Inspector? What is ironic is his brother, Virgil Vivi. He’s like a ghost. And I wish I were talking about the Good Boy from Game of Thrones. Is Virgil Ride or Die? Hell, that’s what I get for naming him after Dante’s hellish guide. He is a ghost, like a pillar of salt, a scoop of vanilla.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It’s like he melts away into the floor or wherever I place him. Braxton and his potential future stepmom, and I talk a lot about having two-leggeds. Sometimes it’s like Virgil forgets he has four legs. Somebody at the Day Job said they’ve seen us walking. So good, I’m not imagining Virgil is here. But he’d rather not be here in this house. Myself, Echo.

I would make my absence permanent. But I’m a father of two. Not one, Inspector!

Seriously, you remember The Running Man (2025)? “Richard Lives!” Inspector, always and forever, Braxton Lives! My brave boy. I envy him. And not only the whole shuffling off the mortal coil part. I wish I were so brave as to have his fierceness. Nope Inspector.

“I don’t want to be just one thing. I can’t be. I want to be brave, and I want to be selfless, intelligent, and honest and kind.”
Four ― Divergent

Today, “I feel STUPID!” And we could go on and on in this Mad Season with all that happened at the Day Job. So fucking idiotic that I needed a second to forget. Day One…

I didn’t jerk off yesterday; too much was happening. I didn’t confide in M Anime…

Plenty of things I want inside her. Okay, I’ll stop, or rather begin. Inspector, honestly…

So yesterday ants retook the counter and the doorway. I was mixing up ant killer from the bathroom because you remember what happened last time with all the bug spray…

While fighting that battle, the guest bathroom went cattywampus. Then Amazon was taking my Kindle points, so I bought four books. Outside confidence. Inside blatant STUPIDITY. Braxton Outside, Virgil Inside

2068 Days Without B III, Day 1509 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 090 -B Plays Portal Virgil-

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What Hell is this? What time? Which dimension? But it all tracks. A loving and loyal wife. Same for the family, furry and not. And the home? Monday, Fine. Today… A reenactment of the movie Starship Troopers. I prefer Succubus 8. B Plays Portal Virgil

Tuesday, September 29, 2026

Legacy 090 -B Plays Portal Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But do you know what I need to reread? Pet Loss? Some love story? Kinda

The instructions to the game “Portal”? How I miss the days when games came with actual instruction booklets. I love those. And players’ guides. Game Genie. To have time again.

But no. What I’m in the mood for today is Succubus 8 (Riddles And Revenge): A LitRPG Series by A.J. Markam. “Give Me One Reason to stay here,” you say… May I suggest “Portal 2”? Seriously, what is it about me and portals today? And in the spirit of full transparency, I’ve never played either Portal. And I’m trying to remember Succubus 8 as best I can. This is what happens when you don’t use a woman for audiobooks. Sheesh!

Anyway, I finally got to bed last night, and this morning everything has gone cattywampus.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Your lover, your best friend, your husband, father to our children, I damn sure try!

Honestly though, a plumber, an exterminator, a repair guy, an award-winning author, my love… This is where it is written, “you have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting.” Yes, I am guilty of saying that every day is worse than the last. But with you, our children, fur and skin, I can survive. Only today it’s like I stepped through a portal… Maybe only by a few days to show all my effing loserdom.

You don’t know how badly I want to go back right now. How far? It has nothing to do with you, my boys, our family. Just me. My E-Day wish.

Near the end of E-Day month. I wish the day never existed. Always and forever.

Honestly… I know, my love, I know. I tend to take things too far. But that’s because I want to be even farther away. Or is it further? Did I mention that my writing sucks?

Anyway, A.J. Markam’s protagonist “Ian” had powers over the “Hell Pont”; he could use portals to travel anywhere. Why do you think I chose magic in The Unfinished Archive? Necromancy, time travel, and, portals. And why yesterday was “FINE”.

Today: Ants, busted drawer, crazy toilet, and let’s not forget about the car. Loving you?

Going to see a movie, lying in bed prattling on about the Halliwell sisters. Beats Hell. B Plays Portal Virgil.

2067 Days Without B III, Day 1508 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 087 -Won’t B Piggie, Virgil-

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V and I pigged out. Steak, lobster, baked potato with lobster chunks, and a thing of French fries. Oh and Cheddar Bay biscuits. It wasn’t just the food and a full stomach. Comfort and joy? Wrong holiday? A promise kept to B. “Won’t B Piggie, Virgil.”

Legacy 087 -Won’t B Piggie, Virgil-

Saturday, September 26, 2026

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Trillionaire right now… Which means I can eat all the bacon I please. Ham? Pork chops? A spit roast?

Must I, today? Honestly, I’m not in a “Sexual Healing” type of mood. And obviously I’m lying about that. I’m always horny, angry, and scared. And I am never satisfied.

Seriously, I need to stop lying, Lady Lunalesca. Because, as it was with Braxton, a time without FEAR… Lying in bed and seeing my boy watching the door, protecting me.

Lunalesca, at least for a little while, my belly was full. There was energy, light, and dare I say life? And here we are the very next day, the very next moment, full of bullshit.

Language! My kids are around. I could feel my Braxton’s ‘spirit’. And Virgil’s full of fries and some cuts of steak, only to roll into cookies’ n’ cream ice cream.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I mean his body, which is way different than Braxton’s. B would curl up in my lap and lie there like the warmest, fluffiest pancake. Meanwhile, V is rolled up in the fetal position, expecting abuse. He’s never been hit once since he’s been here. Lu, you know me, hmm.

It’s sad. And you know I pig out on depression, grieving, mourning, and sadness, Luna.

Hate? That too. I’m thinking about that episode of The Twilight Zone, “I Am the Night-Color Me Black.” You see… Or maybe not. The world is so full of… Everything!

Lunalesca, it’s not necessarily beauty, like Ricky says in “American Beauty.” But “I Want It All.” But most days “I ask for nothing, I can get by.” Oh really? Olds?

Fair enough. And if I really were a trillionaire, would I be happy? Hell no! No presence of fear… You know the Michael Kewley quote. But to be full of anything else, my dear Lu

And yesterday there was a mountain of food. Steak and lobster, a lobster baked potato I didn’t order (I wanted regular), but good. Fries for Virgil. And Cheddar Bay Biscuits.

It’s like the moment I… Cum… No, the food wasn’t that good. What I mean is, for that split second, eww. I’m free. It’s not bad, my Lu. Fear, doubt, and disbelief, free your mind.

Stupid, but it’s like Whiteout Survival. I look to Braxton. He was light and warmth.

Furance… And I cook everything. Burn. Won’t B Piggie, Virgil

2064 Days Without B III, Day 1505 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 085 -Braxton, Virgil, I’m Balling-

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“I never bawled!” A Christmas Story. It’s two weeks and change past “E-Day,” and it’s already “Christmas Time In Hell,” or the Bad Place, as my boys bark. But I’m not crying about it, playing around, and “I Won’t Dance.” Braxton, Virgil, I’m Balling.

Thursday, September 24, 2026

Legacy 085 -Braxton, Virgil, I’m Balling-

2062 Days Without B III, Day 1503 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? Mine? “Fighting and trouble are my middle name.” Yours, “Barks”; your brother’s “Vivi”.

“Duh”! I want to avoid talking about today. I don’t want to talk about next week either, B. Damned if I do work and damned if I don’t. Why can’t this be work? Braxton side-eye

I haven’t bawled over you and Virgil much this week. And maybe I should… Keep my eyes nice and lubricated. Not a day has gone by that I haven’t worried about going blind since all the bugs, the bug spray, and any other bullshit getting in my eyes. Even now…

Alice Braga and Mark Ruffalo in “The Blindness”. Seriously? I’d say I should send you to time-out, but I did that permanently five years ago. There I go crying again. “Stop Crying Your Heart Out,” right? Or “Eat More Chicken.”

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

It beats the alternative, though. “’Cause we men, ain’t we?” “Glory” be! We are but men, Braxton. You, Virgil, and I. You licking your downstairs. Me and your potential future stepmom, and Virgil is looking for something of his own. Like father, like son, balless.

Metaphorically speaking, of course. Your brother and I are both cowards. But then I go talking to M Anime, and I’m all “Balls Deep In Love.” I know B III, I really do. Ahem, ew.

But I did promise to find you a mom someday… Stepmom. Speaking of promises, B…

We’re still in Emergence Day month, and with my last paycheck… Uh oh! I was thinking I could get that Emergence Day dinner I couldn’t afford on the day. Work?

The Bad Place. This week and last have not been a ball. And this coming week, I go back to being broke. I even wasted twenty bucks at the food truck today. Shared with Virgil…

And as far as broke, that’s what I was doing at the Bad Place today. I had to break a pallet that was stuck on the pallet jack this morning. In front of so many babes… Uh, boobs/yabbos… Not quite… Busybodies? B, for all intents and purposes, it was humiliation galore. I felt like bawling. And I don’t mean playing b-ball- the real ick, B.

Bawling my eyes out, drooling over M Anime’s big beautiful yabbos, even balling as in playing Whiteout Survival. Life’s no ball. Braxton, Virgil, I’m Balling

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 084 -Damage Report, Levels B-V-

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Wednesday, September 23, 2026

Legacy 084 -Damage Report, Levels B-V-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I woke up twice. I’m here. “I never yielded! And as you can see, I am not dead.”

“No. It’s foolish to ask for luxuries in times like these.”
― The Road (2009)

Wishful thinking at its finest, my dear Inspector. But shall we begin with the evaluation?

Physically, my heart hurts. That’s a fucked up thing for me to say, considering my Ma and my boys’ potential future stepmom. Talk about heart problems. But I swear, I feel it. My heart is broken. And the physical exertion, the stress, every beat is lesser than the overall remembrance that Braxton is gone and I’m failing Virgil, Inspector, always.

Honestly, my left eye is still irritated… hurts now and again. For a few minutes I felt I was going blind during the truck unload—terrifying prospect, The Blindness, Inspector.

I nearly got crushed by a pile of boxes… Dammit, can’t the Grim Reaper do anything right these days, Inspector?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

This leads me to the mental. Braxton knows I could go into talking to him, my dead furry son. I talked to his brother too. Virgil is back in my good graces… No shit, Sherlock.

Literally. I’m talking to you—the fictional hot police detective. You’re based on “Carla Valenti” from Indigo Prophecy/Fahrenheit if you’re curious. Oh, and The Unfinished Archive… Delusion, Fiction, hell, a bit fucked up. It all makes my head hurt. Ouch!

And the first thing I did when I got back. Well, since I can’t take my head off. Uh, what?

Yeah, I have something in the drawer, but instead I slept. Passed out? Quite accurate.

Inspector, as the song asks, “Where Is My Mind?” Guess is as good as mine.

Why? I remember. I “Woke Up This Morning” and got myself a… Nope! A “Bloom.”

Inspector, I needed something so I could at least text M Anime coherently. I was almost late for the Day Job: exhaustion, Heat, and a Stomachache. I forgot a Gatorade; M Anime and her electrolytes. I didn’t take Virgil out. I failed my son, but he didn’t poop or worse… Of course my playlist is always hit or miss at the Day Job. Today’s offender was The Cure’s Love Song. First, I was looking for 311’s version. Secondly women… Scary.

Lastly, the most embarrassing moment. The pallet jack got stuck in a tiny pallet, and who took the blame? Everything I touch gets damaged. M Anime? Damage Report, Levels B-V

2061 Days Without B III, Day 1502 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 083 -LANGUAGE “B”ecause There’s Virgil-

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Someone not so wise once said, “These b*tches ain’t loyal.” Uh, I said not so wise, not that it wasn’t true. I’m fortunate to have loyalty. My boys, my woman, uh… But I don’t say, like, love and loyalty, right. LANGUAGE “B”ecause There’s Virgil

Tuesday, September 22, 2026

Legacy 083 -LANGUAGE “B”ecause There’s Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? So why don’t I say it then? It sounds better in Spanish… And I’m learning.

Hell! Have I known you longer than my firstborn son? Triond? That might be older than Braxton. Back when I thought writing would save me… Would save us, not knowing.

Love, if I had a penny for everything I don’t know. Because “Hey Jealousy,” the first time I found love- I mean real- I will watch cities burn for you; I will bathe in blood for you; I will initiate genocides for you; take a bullet for you; you don’t even have to ask; make John Wick look like a freaking priest type of love was for Braxton Barks Bradford.

Darling, “He’s My Son,” period. There is nothing else. And I haven’t said “I love you,” Virgil, to his brother since Saturday, August 13, 2022.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

But ‘All The Above,’ as it was with his brother. Why? Virgil Vivi Bradford. Honestly…

“He’s My Son.” I may be a shitty father. Really… Virgil took a ‘dump’ in the hallway today, and I have him on punishment. Anyway, I care for him. I keep saying, He’s My Son.

And you are my wife, my lover, my woman, my girl, “My Goddess,” the mother of our crumb snatchers. Make no mistake, we made those, as I say with Braxton. I didn’t pour the Bisquick, but he was/is my Pancake. In this case, we often talk about me pouring the Bisquick and you making us a whole flippin’ stack of pancakes. I “Don’t Mind” Love.

You know I love them all, Always and Forever, Love.

And as I said at the beginning, you know I love you, right? Again, there’s Virgil, and there is also my craft. But how do I choose to show that love? I still hate myself…

Seriously, all forty-two years. I even miss all my Ben-Hur slavery humor, you know, 41

“We keep you alive to serve this ship. Row well and live”
From 1959’s Ben-Hur

A bad word? Slavery? I ain’t fucking MAGA. And it’s weird, you know. If I’m ‘lazy’ loving myself, I’m even lazier when it comes to hate. Everything is fucking exhausting.

Fun sometimes. Like the names I call you in the ‘throes of passion’. Cumslut? Damn!

Only, I can’t say… I can’t show. For example, there’s a… pornographic movie, Braxton’s Favorite Girl, and I watched. Well, she knows my love language? Loyalty. LANGUAGE “B”ecause There’s Virgil

2060 Days Without B III, Day 1501 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 080 -Traffic’s A B, Virgil-

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“The Road.” The Long Walk. Me and my son Virgil. No lights, but plenty of spider webs, scary people, and the street wasn’t too hot for his paws. But I’ve been out there all week, this week, and SIGH, I’ll miss it the week after. Traffic’s A B, Virgil

Saturday, September 19, 2026

Legacy 080 -Traffic’s A B, Virgil-

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Trillionaire right now… So I intend never to drive again. But fuck ever riding in anything Elon Musk owns.

LANGUAGE! And aren’t I on “X”? I’d rather be on M, to be honest, as in Anime, “My Boys” Potential Future Stepmom. Do I ever stop? “I live with the BREAKS off.” But for real, Lady Lunalesca. I ain’t Wiz Khalifa or John Cena. Free to go anywhere I want.

However, it’s not free to be anywhere I want. “This Is America.” And my head is one huge playlist that’s running nonstop. And if it isn’t music, it’s mourning B and sometimes preemptively Virgil. What a monster I am. Ask M Anime’s mammaries. “Pretty Mess.”

As in (moaning) “I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum! Where am I going with this, my dear Lunalesca? Ten years with this blog, a year with The Unfinished Archive. Existing.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And as I laid my head down last night – well, rather this morning around 1:00 AM. “The only day I hate more than today is tomorrow.” I hate the next day even more, Luna.

Of course we’ve been over this: there are exceptions… Braxton’s Death, E-Day, M Anime’s departure. And I don’t know how to make it stop, Lady Luna. In a good way…

The Grim Reaper won’t take my calls. The Sandman will answer, but that’s renting peace.

And today I have two redheads in The Unfinished Archive. Another song, “I Can’t Stop”

Flux Pavilion? Another button press, another beat of my heart, another breath, two sets of breasts/yabbos from a mother and daughter. I need to stop and think. Worry, Nervousness, Anxitey…

I’m a yellow-bellied coward, Lu—no wonder I spend so much time covering it in white. And no, I don’t mean Virgil’s fur. I know exactly where my ‘cream’ belongs if M Anime has her way. Babies. Strangely enough, I’m not scared of being a Dad. Four legs or two?

Most days my biggest fear is being Slow, Simple, or let me just say the word, STUPID. I can’t be that Dear Lu. Anything else. Then why can’t I find happiness? Am I scared, hmm

“your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones
(Ooh) turn into something beautiful
(Ah) and you know, you know I love you so
You know I love you so”
Yellow

I’d be one of these MAGA Cracker Hats apologizing to the Man in the Mirror. It’d blow my mind. Whether I’m sitting in traffic or stroking my cock a mile a minute on the loveseat. Eww! Traffic’s A B, Virgil

2057 Days Without B III, Day 1498 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 078 -Horrors B And V-

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It’s not even Halloween yet. E-Day has been over. The most horrific day ever was back in January. But today I’m in line, crying over my boy, money slipping away, worried about every blip in my vision, etc. The Horror, the horror! Horrors B And V

Thursday, September 17, 2026

Legacy 078 -Horrors B And V-

2055 Days Without B III, Day 1496 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? Mine? I can’t get that Michael Kewley quote out of my mind, B.

“When we stop trying to create happiness, happiness comes by itself. It is a common mistake to believe we have to work hard for happiness, or that happiness is conditioned by what we have, and who we are in society. Happiness is the experience of mind when there is no presence of fear. That’s all. It’s simple.”
― Michael Kewley

Here in my car, I feel safest of all… Ok, No. Your Dad is a liar, but I’m one for an earworm. Um, sounds terrible, doesn’t it? Somewhat like, “slept like a rock.” Headstone? Graveyard.

But I’m not scared of dying, Braxton. Is it that I will ALWAYS be in mourning over you, or is it all the freaking spooky season crap at the Day Job? Two things being true…

Honestly… Today, while I worked in fear within the Bad Place, as you and your brother think of it. As I sat in terror in the car. As I woke in horror of having to come and talk to you…

I love you, B and 2-V… But allow me to rip off Alice in Wonderland.

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

Six Things That Scare Me:

1: Forgetting You, Failing Virgil. It just popped in my head today. Greatest love I’ve ever known, you and 2-V

2: Losing Your Potential Stepmom. I cried over you. And she hates me comparing. You and her are my heart.

3: My Eyes, My Eyes. I ‘thought’ I got bug spray in my eyes after recent events. I’m not blind

4: The Black Ant Incursion. Carpenter Ants destroyed the backyard shed last year. Now little ants on the kitchen floor.

5: Leaving The Bad Place. We hate it, Little B. But I got called into the office yesterday… Moving shelves

6: I Need Money, B. You’d be proud, Braxton. I shared fries with your brother. But $250 a week! Fuck!

And I should watch my language, I know. Such a small word, but with such a big impact. B III. And with all these words, what? Am I building a life? You don’t need happiness.

But that’s what I was thinking about… “No presence of fear.” When I was a Senior in high school, after the homecoming pep rally for about five minutes. Whenever I would wake up and see you sitting at the foot of the bed. To my fears. You shall not pass!

Seriously, you don’t want to know this one, B. But when me and your stepmom make you and Virgil some siblings. Man is a small word. I Love You is a small phrase. Why not FEAR? Horrors B And V

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 077 -A Sinner’s B+ Virgil-

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I didn’t need to read some book to so that I may see all of my sins. I don’t need all of my F report cards or my bank saying I made $250 (cough) okay a little less. And my two greatest blessings and sins have sat right beside me. A Sinner’s B+ Virgil

Wednesday, September 16, 2026

Legacy 077 -A Sinner’s B+ Virgil-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… And what would I grade my so-called sins? Somewhere between the future’s so bright, I gotta wear shades?

I can’t decide between Heaven’s Light and Hellfire. Decide, me? A few things Dear Echo.

First I stole this from “The Hunchback of Notre Dame”. What’s one more sin hmm, considering I’m also stealing the whole “Six Impossible Things” concept from “Alice In Wonderland,” today. Second… And what should actually be first, we’ve already established I’m going straight to Hell for what happened to B. Do I mean killing him?

And what about Virgil? Has he seen a veterinarian? As much as I love my boys together, let it be in The Land of Make Believe, The Unfinished Archive. And not on The Rainbow Bridge anytime soon. Or wherever it is my Braxton went. Do I know? Can I see? My Six Sins this week:

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

1: Braxton Is Still Dead. This is what I count as my original sin. Even worse than being born. I took my furry son’s life. Was is INDIFFERENCE or RAGE?

2: I Am Failing Virgil. He’s been here since Saturday, August 13, 2021, his Gotcha Day. This is the first year I have failed to get him to a vet.

3: I’ve ignored M Anime. Not intentionally. And she’ll be upset with me saying this but like the week Braxton died. I’ve been working, writing, and generally wasting my existence.

4: Ants took the kitchen. My eyes to the floor.

5: I’m didn’t go blind… But bug sprayed eyes worries

6: Feeling super, super, super… “Teen Idle” for the rest

And it’s only “Hump Day”

Other than one through three, would you consider any of these worth a free ticket to the Hell I’m feeling? Are any of them worth a B+? I was saying sonly yesterday in Legacy 076 -There B Elephants Virgil-. The proverbial elephant in the room. My boys, my woman, and my craft, my greatest joys are also my greatest fears. And yet today me Echo.

I got called into the office at the Day Job. Boss Lady only wanted me to move a few shelves

I zoned out sitting up just to try and talk to you. I could have done, I don’t know, what. Today was pay day and I planned on going out with what? $250 a week? Please! A Sinner’s B+ Virgil

2054 Days Without B III, Day 1495 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will