At The Age of Occasional Wellness

What’s my age again, what’s my age again, the dog and I are old men without a doubt and I wonder what his life goals were, better his than mine, because he at least has a chance I suppose? “At The Age of Occasional Wellness”

What big I’s you got?
The better to see no one’s coming
but if you expected nothing…
At any time, you can stop
looking and maybe jot
this down to one more day of succumbing
to your greatest sin, becoming
more “hopeful” in your old age and that’s a lot

Because what big zeros you see
There aren’t a lot, quality over quantity
Honestly
know your place, keep your place and be
a shoe, and that’s not a big number, but geez
it beats your age and keeps out the laughter of this comedy
Walking away from your curiosity
Zero to hero, there’s the possibility

These words, these words, these words, big and small
might as well be on other planets
or thrown away by the force of habit
Maybe not even written at all
That is why there are so many places to fall
Oops, oh my, ow, tragic
There is no need to can it
I’d say if there were anyone to call

then what’s with all the holes
cause I got enemies, got a lot of enemies
my wishes, dreams, and quite a few deities
better known as girls, when I would rather sell my soul
for any margin of control
of my mental facilities
At the age of thirty-three
It was never a life goal

Only obeying, obtaining, obsessing over, obvious occasions occasionally okay

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Mannerisms

I’m not like them, alive, man, human, or at least I don’t look at myself as being treated like one human to another these days, especially not today I was only a child and maybe that was worst, children are people too but what am I. “Mannerisms”

How I wish to be the tin man,
as it’s a sin man to take everything
and I mean everything, please understand,
to heart. Understand me the slings
and arrows and so I ran
because I was not him I ran to cling

onto every part of this scarecrow form.
This form might as well be me, I insist
but you insist, in fact, you warn
me, I would warn you, if I could find my lips.
What good are those lips for, if they adorn
one who will only adorn a checklist

of what not to do in your car.
Here in my car, I feel safest of all
a dummy, after all, is not my choice by far
only it would be far enough, even if I fall
for anything, fall and crash, there you are
yet are you serious, as I lie here sprawled

out as though this is unknown.
Nothing is unknown in this digital age
Apart from my age, my rage, the hard stone
iron fist, losing my marbles, stone heart, not one page
there are dozens, hundreds, thousands, millions of storybook bones
my past picking the bones of a player not yet on the stage

So why would I bother to applaud
Yet you all will applaud, daddy, mommy, man, and woman
Autumn leaves take some abroad
Still, I want to believe at home and abroad, someone knew him
Knew of him, knew him, knew me, because everyone thinks they’re God
Forgive me for not praising you God, I wasn’t much of a man for being Human

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

The Air of a Gentlemen

Always reaching, can I keep my feet on the ground for once, someone once said, don’t try to be a great man, just be a man. “The Air of a Gentlemen” I wish I was a little bit taller if only that is all it took these days.

But wherever in the world
does he come from, the hero,
with cape ready and unfurled
because Fierros
don’t save lives
or open a lady’s… eyes.
No, he has returned

Return of the Mack heard,
along with his wish that everybody wants to go to Heaven
she observed
being the angel that beckons
him to take her to a gangsta’s paradise
crying out “I’m alive”
because nobody wants to die when pretty pearls

still, lie undiscovered and the netherworld
can wait
while this gentleman, curled
up so close to God, says “you made a mistake”.
Operating on those they would make divine.
Such a man finds
that while the world does twirl

some rocket man almost hurls
but she didn’t see the meltdown.
How he uncurls
himself from Armageddon, the Apocalypse, the world goes around
though always on alarm,
she has no place but his arms
as though this is Westworld.

A machine and not biology this girl
falls like autumn leaves
perhaps like a thousand words
that the writer has yet to believe.
Maybe like any other,
he might learn to fly as the Wright Brothers
with the air of a gentlemen and reach her

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Popup Passengers

Life is one hell of a trip and I think walking takes too long, I mean we’re supposed to enjoy the trip but I feel maybe I have never found a home. “Popup Passengers”, I’ve just been flying along with others waiting for something, to be welcomed?

To my fellow passengers who wish,
who pray, that ask God

will you catch this?
And before he can even nod

jump of your own accord
traveling on the hands of a clock, the days of a calendar
hoping you don’t fall forevermore

into Superman’s arms.
Entrusting that your donation

in truth, justice, the American way, in all its charms
will get you to your final destination

Which is… do you even know anymore?
Your own heart’s parameters
as if this is what you came for

an inch, a ticket, a page
telling you where to go, on a pen tip

flying from its cage
not knowing where you’ll be at the end of it.

Only escape is its own reward
or at least higher than the Challenger
Can you afford

the mental rent in the minds of men
a window seat

asking again and again
when shall we meet

my Sweet Lord.
In this life, in this can of worms
what am I moving towards

like so many others
where will my life begin

for I am no Wright brother
watching autumn leaves in the wind.

Welcome aboard
All my fellow passengers
Don’t know how or why but watch how I soar

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Wright Height

Clearing my head but men dream of many great things I believe, well one and all other thoughts just sort of circle around that during the day. “Wright Height”, I wanted to be a pilot once upon a time, I wished.

And who was the first man to believe?
Was it he who ran the numbers
or those who became art lovers
who painted forbidden fruit on the trees,
until it was so conceived?
Maybe the Wright brothers,
to the man that pilots the space shuttle.
that Autumn leaves

left much to be desired
The dreams of boys to men
Going where no one has ever been
How much higher,
cause no one told me about her,
making me wish I was a little bit taller…

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Nut Up

As Lenny Kravitz put it, I want to get away, I want to fly away, and if only I had the money, the sweet temptation, or the cojones just because it sounds better in Spanish? Nut Up, I am aware peanuts grow underground for those in the peanut gallery.

Here’s to growing up so nuts
that I believe I can fly
up, up and away like Superman
playing insane in the membrane
so I will not grieve

as autumn leaves,
flee the trees, and I ask, what
can’t you even say goodbye?
Still, I try and understand
even though it’s such a pain

that I take solace with Mary Jane
because who would want gravity
when all everybody asks is, what’s up?
The forbidden fruit, that’s a mile high
I might land,

fall, crash, will I ever be able to stand
another Pina Colada and being caught in the rain
or even the sun shining
hard enough, rich enough, am I tall enough
to talk to God in the sky.

What if he says why, why
with red eyes I planned
to dream, the impossible dream on this airplane
Well, I believe…
only the stewardess says but

sir, I’m all out of love

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Fall Better

Maybe there was just too much Fall stuff at work today, maybe my yard is just in a mess, and it’s no secret that God and I have had our problems, I have problems with everyday people. Fall Better, personally I wish we could just go straight to winter

And it was better, twinkle, twinkle, little star
but a man put them in reach
with a son of a preacher man to teach,
that I should not go too far.
So God did endeavor

to make just the only one
morning star, Satan was his answer,
man-made cancer.
It was better when I just called it the sun
God will you make an effort,

like asking the leaves to stay on the trees,
only didn’t we all fall down?
Every color better, green and white, yellow and red, gold and brown
Autumn leaves…
Come on God why would you ever

I mean was this another dare
for me to curse you, curse her, say something?
Made in your image a caveman grunting,
can we not be better, here and there?
Because God you gave me the letters

before the pedestal or the big mouth
My voice before my courage
These feelings only to discourage
It was better without a doubt
Tell me, God, why I met her

You know maybe, just this once, I can do better…

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Lesson 027 ~Topless~

The world is not crumbling around you, no you are crumbling within the world, from crown to toe, and so what remains of whoever you were or still are. Topless, yeah probably not what you’re thinking unless you’re “skeevy” like me.

Friday, July 28, 2017

Lesson 027 ~Topless~

Hey Lady Lu,
Don’t believe what you read and only half of what you hear… I heard that in a movie once but let’s start a bit higher. I know you were thinking this was going to be something “adult” and honestly a part of me wish it was but higher Lady Lu.

Have you ever heard the expressions, having a price on your head, don’t lose your head, hard head, mind playing tricks on me, I could continue, yeah Luna I have a good memory don’t I? Today as the raindrops were falling on my head I just wondered what the price of mine is, the things I know, believe, every solitary thought. Of course, there is the standard, does anyone care enough to want to hate me to that degree; a price on someone’s head when we never use our brains.

“A Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Waste” – Shrink, Get Out (2017) and the UNCF

Now, what our eyes and ears, most days we bury our heads in the sand and here’s another saying for you, “see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil” though I’ve never had much of a challenge with the speaking portion. Now seeing, I have a friend who actually prefers the burka look but it wouldn’t exactly help a guy like me. The hearing evil only applies to what I hear about myself (skeevy, the incident, never forget) … okay and the things that I want to tell you but we have barely been speaking a month since we started back to these somewhat lessons.

Speaking of which what is today’s lesson other than the fact I was listening to a Nas’s song and “Indiana” talking about ape nipples? I suppose I’m thinking about what actually makes us a human, or how about this, why I can’t seem to understand, what makes me, me maybe.

“So what is the “me”?

My brain, I suppose.

Your brain? Your brain is a body part. Like your fingernail or your heart. Why is that the part that’s you?

Because I have sort of a voice in my head, the part of me that thinks, that feels, that is aware that I exist at all.

So if you’re aware you exist, then you do. That’s why you’re still here.” – What Dreams May Come
So I lose my head and the whole world isn’t on my shoulders though it feels that way a lot, don’t I still have plenty of heart? What about guts, do we really need to have another conversation about courage or my lack thereof and yet I still live.

“Hearts are wild creatures, that’s why our ribs are cages”

Probably one of the most beautiful sentiments I’ve ever heard is “don’t hate your broken heart lovely” makes you wonder why we’re so anxious to give it to someone right? How about the people who are looking to steal hearts away, I don’t think I have ever done such a thing, not for lack of trying, does that make it a crime? Not one heart could be kept in pristine condition, soft-hearted, cold-hearted, what about wearing your heart on your sleeve, makes me think of hiding a dagger to strike.

“Ohh. How embarrassing. There they are. They were inside you the whole time. You did have guts. I’ve never been so wrong in my whole life!” – Negan, The Walking Dead

Now Negan is a teacher if anything he taught me that everyone has guts and anxiety just makes me want to puke mine out all the time. I’ve been trying to keep them in over the past few days, thinking about having any heart changes by the second but as long as I have the guts I keep Braxton and me alive no matter what. How about the fact that I need them to find a woman and I can worry about a heart later?

Of course, this brings another question as we travel lower and lower because heart and guts don’t make you a man or even a decent human being. If I were to lose all of that what would I be then Luna, would I be someone like you, or something else.

Promise we’re not going to talk about whatever madness Trump is starting, but I know my biology and “equipment” quite well. What is it I told “Okay” the other day, I don’t want a woman that keeps me on my toes but knocks me off my feet, whatever that means.

Someone once said, vote with your crotch because, your mind can be fooled, your heart can be broken, and your guts are sort of twisted but your naughty bits always know what they want and I happen to agree. On the other hand, men thinking with the little head and not the big head leads to plenty of trouble and don’t even dare to dream that you can use both. Needless to say, a nice “release” can make everything appear so much clearer but with my writing who truly knows.

Last but not least, getting weak in the knees, “knocky” in the knees, knocking boots, now that is one I haven’t heard in a long time. Falling in love… I think if anything and you know me well enough to figure, we have to fall might far before we can even hope to be made whole. Walk a mile in my shoes perhaps, it all begins with that single step, and so on and so forth but in the movie “Just Looking” I liked that expression of, I don’t sell shoes Lenny, I sell journeys.

What the hell have I learned today, from crown to toe, what makes us, might have nothing to do with the physical, take it all away and what are we left with? I don’t know but naked and afraid, topless, even nonexistent, there is something, no man can see and that perhaps is what makes the man, woman, human, and it’s more than God, Topless.

What a Lovely Grip

Get a grip, I don’t love her yet but what else do I hang onto, I can catch her eye for a second, maybe a smile, she’s even touched me for a moment but while hope springs eternal it was not meant for anyone forever. “What a Lovely Grip”

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-siZzbV1RGw

So we let go of Heaven
to learn how to fly
But we never look down

And I don’t know how
Is that a reason to lie
“To the stars” is that where we’re headed?

If I had just another second
Would you ask me why?
You are here; you’re mine, and now

I’m holding you, you’re holding me
How I have dreamed of this,
as zippers and buttons fall away;
what do I hold onto?
It’s you that I’m touching

Scratches all down my back… you’re blushing
Love me like you do
tonight, tomorrow, where were you yesterday
You answer with a kiss
yet in the morning we see

Clothing, bed sheets, did we rip these?
It looks as though Heaven won’t be missed
The feathers, the colors, the light, still falling anyway
Along with three little words… “I love you”
If I had to say something

Get a grip

Falling for you, falling for it

I want to hold your hand… but “those words” might slip

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired By: Victoria… Real Doll, Kirsten Dunst “Dream of Me” Get Over It (2001), Buckcherry “Crazy Bitch”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, A Great Big World Ft. Christina Aguilera “Say Something”, and T. V. Carpio “I Want To Hold Your Hand” (The Beatles Cover)

Landing Love

Falling in love… one is always falling but I’ve seen those couples afterwards; someday I want to wake up with the sunlight and a pretty girl. I want to fly to come back to Earth; it’s why God made beds, carpeted floors… “Landing Love”

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4_0AsdGXvU

And I’d like to land

No not a trip
or so much as even a slip
But what lovers do after the fall
Tell me, this is it
I don’t think so as all

of me and all of you, lies in a pile of clothes
with nowhere we want to go
Yet we cannot be stranded

Because that’s the way love goes
Only if we were together…

Angel don’t pluck your feathers
Still with all my love letters
Think I can, I think I can

Never, I’ll never catch you
“Love me like you do”
As you make capes out of bed sheets
For even the stars fall too
Just where we will meet

In each other’s arms; you’re my woman, if I’m your man

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired By: Elly Tran Ha… Elly Kim Hong, Johnny Jewel Ft. Saoirse Ronan “Tell Me”, John Legend “All of Me”, Janet Jackson “That’s the Way Love Goes”, The Pillows “I Think I Can” FLCL, and Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack