Gospel 087 ~Will Of Early Birds~

Why do birds suddenly appear? Why did the chicken cross the road? It’s better to be a live chicken than a dead duck. Okay, so this morning, I saw BK was voted the best chicken sandwich. Well, that was a blanking lie. Will Of Early Birds, chat or food

Saturday, September 26, 2020

Gospel 087 ~Will Of Early Birds~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so I should send someone out shopping. Who was it that said if you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything? If there’s one thing I want in these times, it’s time itself. Now I could talk about living in the moment, but I seldom ever do. Hell Lady Lu, all I do is talk to you and the girls, but I have no interest in looking back on those conversations. Here and now, I had a spirited discussion with M. Anime. My dreams last night were thoughts of COVID-19. Yesterday I got a “TOY.”

Dale Carnegie was right about keeping busy to avoid worry. Yet I worry about the past, present, and possible all at once. My history, again, today, I’m worried about keeping “IT” in my pants. Some time ago, I said I would have a day I don’t talk about legs, breasts, and thighs, but it is not this day. For Existence Day, I got the Adam and Eve Bangin Betty Stroker Kit. My that takes me back to how I got my first Fleshlight. To a time, I began studying BDSM; research. How about watching Extreme Movie for the first time?

Somehow from all of that, I found my life’s purpose. At present, I can’t say that I’m living up to it. Now understand this, Lady Lu, it has never deviated from writing. I knew of Le Marquis De Sade but hadn’t read his works. I read books on BDSM, for example, Dom’s Guide To Submissive Training. It wasn’t until I found my mother’s copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. I realized people could write like that… Badly, I can hear the jokes. Only I discovered a whole world and that men can write like that too. S. Wolf “Sex Zombies.”

Still, I will say tomorrow, okay? I was up at 4:00 AM somehow, but what time is it now? It’s been about 11 hours, and what can I say I have accomplished today. Well, at least I ain’t hungry because I’ve been everywhere, Ma’am. All the same, where will I be tomorrow, and how is the new week looking. The only way I see myself flying is if someone pecks at me. If I were a Christian man, all Jonah and the whale, I think.

Why do birds suddenly appear, SIGH, Will Of Early Birds.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 262 ~Side Order Of Will~

I feel like chicken tonight, or is that all I have in the fridge, I saw Chinese zodiac symbols once and maybe I would prefer to stay a rat, I always feel like a pest, but no my name is still on somebody’s tongue. “Side Order Of Will,” no thanks.

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Episode 262 ~Side Order Of Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
How To Make One Million Dollars, go hungry or more to the point of staying hungry. I’m still looking into the future, today’s the 15th, and I’m gearing up for Camp NaNoWriMo. Now, how embarrassing would it be if I didn’t accomplish this? Humiliating that I have all these ideas but nothing to write Inspector. So I’ll get the usual which is PORN. I would say Erotica, but I don’t want to lie or worse what if I take too long deciding. What if I can’t see anything, and you know my thoughts on right and wrong.

My mom taught me to never go to the grocery store on an empty stomach. She also taught me how to make tartar sauce, how to microwave cooked shrimp. Mom also introduced me to the Subway Buffalo Chicken. Funny I mention chicken because that’s my sin. The biggest one, this FEAR, COWARDICE, my transforming into a feathery fiend. One who sits down in a Chinese restaurant, afraid to speak up. Also, the gas station where some other guy makes the attendant notice me. Some people might find it gratifying when they visit “their” bar. Then are immediately recognized. Only then you go into Walmart, and the lady knows you’re there merely for the ranch wings?

I’m a creature of habit, routine, TRADITION. Only every day more like everything in my life, there is some girl I followed, and I can’t break free. The Red Lantern, that was Indiana Gone, Subway again was my mom. McDonald’s because I thought the girl liked me. How about Cherry who talks to me about “stalking?” I never have, but I never half-ass anything but my work sadly. If I know enough, then I can’t fail and if I ask; Twitter is still pending? Blocked on Facebook, knocked off Instagram I keep my mouth shut. Chicken’s aren’t meant to fly, and somebody will get pissed at me for saying this. Still those birds are on the list for a “feast,” and it’s eating me alive.

I’m sick of holding walls up, of waiting. I’m living that idiom of “you are what you eat,” or maybe having a cow man. I’m sure this week in the future I have, and I’ll be living the same way, won’t I?

For all of this I ask forgiveness, but again that’s tradition because it is something I’m not changing isn’t it. Like all those times I went without eating because I refused to live this way. Inspector Echo I’d starve before begging any day a Side Order Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 280 ~I Missed Health Class~

When was the last time I wanted to get out of bed, not needed, not have to, not a challenge, no I only wanted to get up and live… is it too early for Christmas and can I be a kid again and go back to school. I Missed Health Class.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

Lesson 280 ~I Missed Health Class~

Hey Lady Luna,
I Am Not Fine Today because I missed health class, not all of it but probably more than Sex Ed, only this is America, so most kids missed that conversation, to be honest. What I mean there are plenty of things about health that I should have learned being an African-American and all. Personally, I never dreamed I’d get out of my teens and with diet, a brain only a zombie could love, the cops, let’s say things aren’t looking that good.

You may be wondering what brought all this up; maybe it’s the fact that I have wasted yet one more day of my life in bed. Except for walking my dog and nature’s call, I’ve been down for the count. What honestly baffles me is the concept that I have held my day job for almost seven years and in all that time, I’ve been late once, and I’ve called out once, been too sick to stay one time, and left early maybe twice. One of those times was for another job, and the other was for my writing career, and yet I’m not writing today, am I Lady Lu?

I wasn’t learning how to survive on Pop-Tarts and toast, maybe pizza and Rotisserie Chicken every night, am I complaining about food and money right now? Lady Lu they don’t talk about when you’re so depressed that your body follows suit and you’re weighed down by something as light as a blanket. How about cold, the weather has been like something out of “1408” hot, wet, frozen, wasteland but every work day I go out into that, and it’s killing me, but I have a billion excuses as to why I can’t do for me.

Speaking of killing, I haven’t had a run-in with the law for the longest time but from searching on Motherless.com to my Pinterest boards being knocked out, to Facebook collecting intel I could face arrest for a great many things. Am I still hung up on the Pinterest thing… tell that to the hundred or so episodes of General Hospital I have yet to watch and just might give up.

Health Class wants to teach you to stay strong and not just lie on your back which goes right back into how come there’s no sexual education at most schools. I’ll tell you what I haven’t learned today, how to deal with an ever-growing weakness pervading my body but hey Lu I Missed Health Class.

“There is only one rule that binds all people. One governing principle that defines every relationship on God’s green earth: The weak are meat, and the strong do eat.” Dr. Henry Goose, Cloud Atlas (2012)

I Will Have No Fear

First Slam Problems

I was arrested when I was a kid so you would figure being an “adult” would give me some appreciation of freedom in this big wide wonderful world and yet I spend most of my time in a box. First Slam Problems, and second, third

Will it be chicken, sausage, maybe ham
all three and even more
but I really should get out the door

as I’ve never seen a match, a game, athletes on the lam
that some would call tradition
or tell me that wrestling is fiction

And I could always claim a traffic jam
I don’t walk or run, I’m allergic to the sun
Excuses I have a ton

So what’s one more slam,
when I’m here and free
Just not to be me…

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Lesson 067 ~Take the Cake Please~

It feels like I have already had a whole cake to myself, cheesecake maybe, but I’m going to be full of so many things tomorrow but I must stand strong, or rather lie in my bed, but this will be no walk in the park. Take the Cake Please

Wednesday, September 6, 2017

Lesson 067 ~Take the Cake Please~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear, tomorrow will be a piece a cake, I keep telling myself that, a piece of cake, I wonder what great man upon facing the day that would define them figured that it would be a piece of cake. Sometimes I feel as though I have faced that day, others I truly hope not, and then I wonder why such a day exist, I feel you know what I’m talking about.

“Selling a gun for the first time is a lot like having sex for the first time. You’re excited but you don’t really know what the hell you’re doing. And some way, one way or another, it’s over too fast.” Yuri Orlov, Lord of War

Why sell guns my beautiful Lu (you see I gave you your form back) world’s gonna end one way or another, too bad it won’t be tomorrow but anyway, first I sell something worse than guns and second why must such and such a day be the day that defines me? When I was thinking about what I would want my name on, the cake did not come up, marquee, bestseller list, hell I might even prefer a headstone, no actually burn me and scatter me somewhere, haven’t thought of it yet. Haven’t thought of a lot actually considering everything I need to get done, everything that is coming up, not a piece of cake.

“Stay here.

Yeah right! Eat me, said the cake to Alice!” Stephen King’s Desperation (2006)

How about as easy as pie… can’t say I have a thing for pie either, I did like pumpkin pie once upon a time, and blueberry pie sounds yummy but I can’t say I have much of an appetite; this morning’s breakfast is like a stone. My mom never told me there’d be days like this, but she’s no prophet of course but if she had been I imagine I wouldn’t be in this mess at the moment, then again God fearing woman that she is… There is also the fact that when I know something like this is coming, I feel physically ill anyway, but already asked “Gospel Girl” about pizza, who says no to pizza right, but again who says no to cake and ice cream as well.

There are just too many things I can say about cake, for example, I always pictured myself as one of those men who just want to watch the world burn, and not be surrounded by a bunch of people singing, not that I’m worried about that happening, these days right. So what have we learned, well I think cupcakes are delicious and I wish I could remember what buttercream actually was but these days Luna, seriously Take the Cake Please?

“Piece of cake! Piece of cake!

Piece of cake!” – the movie Battlefield Earth (2000)

I Will Have No Fear

Fresh Fear

They don’t know they’re gone die… cows I mean, indeed all animals, hell neither do I and yet I know the fear of death. Fresh Fear; it seems like every day I find something new to be afraid of and one day I will be devoured, and when the time comes I’ll be…

Fresh, alive, me
After last night’s dream
More like a nightmare, you see

Born of my indiscretion
Reflected
Detected

On my way to the slaughterhouse
To be a mouse
How I denounce

This heart’s beating
There is no entreating
The end I’m meeting

I’m already burning
With the blades turning
Already hurting

Misery and strife
I’ll fry
But first the knife

Better to rot
At least it would stop
Wouldn’t be on top

Those carrion crows
Who would know?
Where could I go?

Nowhere
It’s not fair
Being so scared

Chosen
Frozen
Is there atonement?

Never
Should I treasure?
Forever

I don’t want to die
Or hide
Not even survive

Another breath to give
To live
Don’t think I ever did

Fear is all
As my flesh crawls
Raw

Copyright © 2012, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Six Dollar Clowns

Only today because I mentioned it in my “How I Learned to Hate Beyoncé” lesson, did she even exist way back then, every generation talks about the music before but this was the job before… Hardee’s. Six Dollar Clowns hmm

Ha Ha, Oh boy
Or girl
Really the whole damn world
What will it be sir
Voices and noise

Laughing and snacking
Is it not enough?
Maybe I’m just not tough
It’s all just too much
My soul is cracking

They’re attacking
Employers yes
Employees a mess
Guests
My soul, shattering

It’s too much
The noise
No joy
Call me a scared little boy
As you serve and eat your mush

Wearing tin grins
Throwing away your trash
Blow it out your ass
And you wonder why I’m sad
Because in the end…

To shout out
I can only stand around
Be bound
Another one of you six dollar clowns
Early clock out

Six dollar clown
But I’m not happy
It’s maddening
Working for Hardee’s
A fool, a loser, a nothing, I wear a frown

Copyright © 2011, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.