My biggest fear… Nope! I lost my son. But I fear drowning, too. With so many tears and how much rage? And with desires raining like humiliations galore. Uh, working? But fear. At least the house’s not flooding… Again. Rooms B Through V
Tuesday, February 18, 2025
Meditation 232 ~Rooms B Through V~
Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And if only that love were as easy as saying, “Braxton, Virgil, and others, Bedtime!”
D.L. Hughley once warned that the kids would walk in on us. You realize that. It was something to that effect. And did I think of our two-legged children before Braxton or Virgil? If only you knew how I protected B III and 2-V. But today, “What About Us,” love.
No, that’s not the song I heard you singing around 2 AM this morning. And I won’t attribute this to my son. My love, this is all you. It was Lykke Li’s “I Follow Rivers.”
The song has been stuck in my head all morning, and I’m trying to figure out where I heard it. Besides your lovely voice, it was also in an episode of Glee I watched before.
But you? In my head?
“‘Tis you floating around my head, my Godqueen.”
― Clarence, The Book of Clarence (2024)
Do you consider that a miracle? Now, if you could only listen, hear, and understand. Dreams have meanings. I’m always saying that to M Anime. So what about that song? For a few days now, I have been cried out over Braxton. To go from his birthday on the 13th to a “Lovely Day” on the 14th. Joy and pain are like sunshine and rain. Right? It’s going from the day I first found love to honoring our passion for each other, my baby doll.
However, the problem remains that my heart is still broken. Again, there’s the song “I Follow Rivers.” You follow my tears, sweat, and blood down.
Down, down, down, into places you should not see. Do those places include where the Bisquick comes from and gave us our other kids? How many bedrooms do we have?
And I’ve said I’m more of a man for a Study rather than a Man Cave. But there’s also the Library, The Red Room or Black. There is the room, a temple to honor my Braxton. I wasn’t kidding when I said I would build that. And V may one day join him. 920 days.
Only the meaning of my dream. It is that the tears, desires, sweat, and toil you experience follow me. Overflowing. And I am like the ocean. You’re filling me up, blowing me up with your love. Rooms B Through V.
1479 Days Without B III, Day 920 of Virgil’s Arrival
B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will