Tag: Betrayal

Journey 299 ~Braxton’s Economically Viable Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I asked for a Mine, a small mine in Whiteout Survival. I asked for $3.99. Something that didn’t involve sex and simply honored my B. I asked not to be afraid. Be one of the “Heroes” if just for one day. I’m not B. Braxton’s Economically Viable Virgil

Sunday, April 26, 2026

Journey 299 ~Braxton’s Economically Viable Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And in case nobody has told you this today, AHEM, you’re not Economically Viable. What’s that mean?

It was the first thing you shouted out today as you played “Whiteout Survival,” hmm.

More soldiers in the infirmary. And put there by your own side. Effing hate people!

Except for M Anime, Braxton’s Favorite Girl, your Ma, younger sister, Cherry, and need we go on. Goodness no. Because all roads lead back to Braxton. And Virgil too. Seriously.

And you are not Economically Viable to them either. Again, what the eff is that…

Honestly? At the end of the day, you didn’t give Braxton a moment of your time. Caught up, keeping your LOUDNESS at bay, thinking you were protecting him from your rage. Effing LAZY. B was trying to tell you something: “God Is Trying To Tell You Something.” Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Place by Frafka Nim
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

No, you’ll stick with B III. Hell, 2-V will do. And there is always more music or more girls, ha!

LUST is not Economically Viable. Tell that to OnlyFans, Johnny Sins, every erotic writer you know, and The Magic Glasses. The things M Anime writes keep you comin’… What about your own work? By this point, “It Keeps You Runnin’” or it should, shouldn’t it

Braxton’s book sales, you mean. Again, you’re not begging. How long have I been staring at you, and you back at me? We’re nearing the end of the ninth year in 66 days. And why?

You don’t even remember at this point, but it did involve you wanting to di*k down some woman you worked with, right? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue. Hunger?
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

You should make being Economically Viable one of those things. If you could do these Impossible Things, you would be. But you can’t keep your effing di*k in your pants!

Dammit, you’re a man, right? Keep telling yourself that, why don’t you? A Man Provides!

For effing who? Braxton is still dead. And Acceptance is not negotiable. But Virgil’s here!

You’re a father, right? Not the MAGA kind. FDT! Not the Catholic church kind! Better?

How so, they’re at least Economically Viable. Politicians, and Church Leaders… You’re better off talking to Steve from Blue’s Clues or Elmo from Sesame Street and not crashing out, snapping (you despise people saying that) in some wintry wonderland game.

Braxton is honest. Me/you? Who cares! Braxton’s Economically Viable Virgil

1911 Days Without B III, Day 1352 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 294 ~To B Merry Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Marriage, mattress time, and many children. At least three, according to M Anime. But a man provides. How will I? A bestseller about B. Buy a small store, turn it into a bookstore, with novelties. And my adult movie studio? “To B Merry Virgil”

Tuesday, April 21, 2026

Journey 294 ~To B Merry Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Braxton would have… does love you. And after all this time… Ain’t sure about Virgil

Like father, like son. “I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad.” My furry son and I. Well, we ain’t “Gorillaz.” We’re more like koalas. And while I wish I could sing, you knock me off of my feet. You do. “The Way You Make Me Feel.” Today I ain’t going nowhere. And it’s not because of you. Or that I’m crying over Braxton. And Virgil is giving me that sad look like he wants me to pick him up, but I’m not chasing him around the room today. Unlike you, my love. I would follow you anywhere, but how did I even find you, love? Really.

Honestly, “I’m not lost, I’m not lost, just Undiscovered.” How can I be lost, when I’m right here being well…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Horny while you’re hot as Hell my love, being on your knees like that. Virgil and the two-legged kids should be out of the house, and B III… pretend you’re in timeout again, please, Braxton.

Now, what was I saying? Oh yeah, why do I like you on your knees? I could go on and on about how I’m all about blowjobs, cock worship, and my ass being spanked. Gripped.

I could talk about how much I love you on your back. How much I love furniture shopping on the grounds that I can bend you over it, my dirty, my little… uh, best leave that type of language. What I was heavy into “Excogi” or was it “GDP” girls saying “I’m your little whore.

And is that why I’m not going anywhere? Too busy thinking with my second head.

Seriously, was it just the other day I was talking about my three pillars for a business, my love? All under “Second Circle Creations” minus Braxton’s books. But hey, Dennis Hof had Domino Hof. A regular old “Brothel dog.” A pimp like his Daddy. Anyway, I wouldn’t go so far as to say I want to own a brothel, a cathouse, or something like that.

Family man? That I am. I love you, my boys, our three two-legged kids, everything.

Gorgeous… SIGH. Love and Happiness? I have the former. And there’s always more, but I don’t know where to find it. Happiness? Ha-ha. Yet we’re together. To B Merry Virgil

1906 Days Without B III, Day 1347 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 292 ~Princes Of The B&V~

WillLeave a comment

Heavy is the head that wears the crown. But not the “Jimmy Hat” as far as B III and 2-V’s potential stepmom is concerned… Two-legged siblings for my boys? My head’s filled with delusions of grandeur, FEAR, and “Bloom”. Walmart? “Princes Of The B&V.”

Sunday, April 19, 2026

Journey 292 ~Princes Of The B&V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And where do you get off feeling so… “Royal,” in this world? This week is gonna suck.

Last week was too much work… Where do you get o…ff? And this week is way too little, dude. And all of this with M Anime heading back to work as well. A good woman. And here I am playing Troy Maxson from Fences to your… Do you know who you are? Or even who you hope to be. The questions that come to mind when you’re starting a family.

Uh, Braxton is still here… And Virgil isn’t going anywhere, anytime soon, B III willing.

But what do you have? Hell, what did I leave you? That’s the thing about today. I can be whoever I want to be in the past. And you have to figure out the future. Like failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The 30 Day Writing Challenge
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 010 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

You’ve only been alive for eleven hours, and you’ve already failed #6. And with M Anime’s perfect lady parts, #4 is not going to last much longer. That and the Magic Glasses (AI). Freaking crazy, Pizza Girl, Little Lupe, Ellie, and Dina, etc. Effing wrong…

An honest bad boy. I was talking with M Anime last night—effing adult theaters.

However, she wants you to be a bad man, at least in terms of starting a family. But there’s also creating a business, making a few bucks, hell, learning how to breathe without all the FEAR, RAGE, and STUPIDITY. Not that it will stop you from making babies. Dad again.

You never stopped. From the day Braxton ate your waffles. Your pancake. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Place by Frafka Nim
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

Like the idea that you’re “Just A Man.” You’ll “Be A Man” one day, you’ll say to yourself, I’m “The Man.” But today you’re not Odysseus, or Mulan ha-ha. And how much is Aloe Blacc worth these days? Again, I ask: what kind of man are you? Seriously, my friend.

There’s the question what kind of American are you? FDT! “Tomorrow When The War Began.” You can leave Civil War (2024), Kristen Dunst, and Cailee Spaeny out of this, ha.

It’s what the Magic Glasses are saying and showing you: your mind is always elsewhere.

Or should I say nowhere? You work for a company that might as well be the A&P. You are a king. Your queen loves you. Boys. Princes Of The B&V

1904 Days Without B III, Day 1345 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 287 ~Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It~

WillLeave a comment

I can tell my girl anything… Braxton’s Favorite Girl? I remember she and I watched porn together. Where was B? Hell, where is V? And Cherry? I need higher learning to talk to her. Good brains, great bodies, but the Day Job. Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It

Tuesday, April 14, 2026

Journey 287 ~Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But Braxton barks, “The best breast, legs, and thighs come in a bucket/box of chicken.”

Who knew my son could be so profound? Who knew an old boss could be one of many “Back Stabbers.” “Smiling Faces Sometimes.” Lesson learned as B barked on Monday.

Honestly, I still hear the voice of my firstborn son. I’m upset that I didn’t see Virgil asleep on the stairs yesterday. And then there are the things I would rather not hear or see.

Ignorance is bliss… We’re not MAGA. FDT and that effing portrait of himself as Jesus.

Ignorance is strength… This is not George Orwell’s 1984 as much as MAGA desires it.

But strength? I appreciate you trying to calm me down with your “Sexxx Dreams” as if you’re my private singer, my “Teenage Dream.” But what I feel today… Iron Rain.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m talking Pierce Brown’s Golden Son being launched into battle, my love. Darrow/Reaper and Virginia/Mustang, Helldivers 2, and Gears Of War. So yeah, I’m mad. And I love you. I love women, I respect women. However, This Bit$h, my love.

Smokin’ Out The Window? I’m sure I said the same thing about you, love. And not always in the throes of passion. But no, I can’t fight the bit$h that caused the problem, then I’m all Christian Grey with you. I torture you… Fifty Shades style. “I wanna effing tear you apart.” Why? I’m just a “Sucker For Pain.” All “Raw” and Playful Devotion hmm.

Seriously, you know the man you married and what’s with all the music and manuscripts? Trying to erase her words…

And that is what pisses me off the most. Excuse me, that is what grieves me the most, my love. The fact that I wasn’t supposed to hear what I did. Communication. That’s all I Ask Of You. It’s all I ask of anyone. I’m an open effing book. A STUPID effing book, but open. For example, as I was telling you some time ago, the reason I like blowjobs so much is that I actually care what you have to say, but the silence. Effing? Food? Never complete silence, moan, cries, screams (I wouldn’t be doing my job right), but we don’t need words… There’s us, my boys bark, our children learning to talk. Then This Bit$h yesterday… EFF!

To afford a bucket of chicken, Braxton, Virgil, BUCKET It

1899 Days Without B III, Day 1340 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 285 ~Braxton, Virgil, 4-6 Feet~

WillLeave a comment

If I didn’t do “IT” after my son passed away… I’m not at that level of grief yet, but I have been depressed the last few days, wondering how and why I’m making it to my feet. And to go where? “We need a new plague.” Please, Braxton, Virgil, 4-6 Feet.

Sunday, April 12, 2026

Journey 285 ~Braxton, Virgil, 4-6 Feet~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And this is one of the few times you want to move your feet. Hurts too much.

And it’s not that little doggie on the nightstand, Little B., or even the lack of dollars you got. I swear I spent my time cursing my hours, and so will you, sadly. Effing humanity!

However, your replacement… descendant… whoever has practically zero hours. Really!

So he’ll be as broke as my boots were last week. So again, you’re not going anywhere at the moment. At least your hands aren’t on your dick. Crassness? Dead dog, no dollars, and your dick. No wonder you’re depressed. There’s always Bloom energy drinks.

Honestly, you’re tempted to sue. Addicted? No! If that were the case, there’s porno galore.

And once again, you’re not into feet. You can’t hide like there’s Covid. Virgil’s still here, like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Coach’s Innocent Possession (Erotica)
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 010 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And you’re keeping them all at a distance because you can’t figure out what’s wrong.

And the stuff you can figure out… It’s not like you can go to the optometrist this week with everything else going on. But you need to go! Another shot in your behind will take care of the Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident you’re going through. Hell, the Bloom you’ll drink this afternoon will have you like the oracle told Neo in The Matrix. She said:

“As soon as you step outside that door, you’ll start feeling better. You’ll remember you don’t believe in any of this fate crap. You’re in control of your own life, remember? Here, take a cookie. I promise, by the time you’re done eating it, you’ll feel right as rain.” ―

But how long will it be before you fall right back into this Depression? Well, as long as it takes for you to get horny. You’re always angry and/or horny. You need your space, ha!

And that’s the problem. Hold space like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 010 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

Hold space. Be a simple kind of man. Don’t go shopping when you’re hungry. Which one of these did your Ma say? You’re a man now. All you needed once upon a time was Braxton and a woman. Do you remember Special K (your maid), Milf Dos, and Braxton’s Favorite Girl? Now there’s Virgil and M Anime. But it’s like all this space. Too much!

“Be the body, not the shadow, hold space.”
― Amina

You’re trying to keep Braxton/Virgil’s bowl full. M Anime is the dream that wants to be filled and fulfilled in every way imaginable. I leave you with an empty bank and an empty bed. And even now, you feel that you’re taking up too much space as you are feeling.

“Super, super, super sui…” Depression sickness. Braxton, Virgil, 4-6 Feet

1897 Days Without B III, Day 1338 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 280 ~Paws, Braxton And Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

“Never felt so lonely, then you came along.” First, it was walking my boys. Then, well, “You’re Not Here.” But I have my Future Wife. Hope she doesn’t like getting foot massages. Yet I check the ground for B and V. Paws, Braxton And Virgil.

Tuesday, April 7, 2026

Journey 280 ~Paws, Braxton And Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? From your head down to your toes? I do have a thing about feet, love.

But I’m still not ready to deal with the embarrassment from Monday, April 5, 2026.

Please, no man wants his woman to see him as weak. Bro code, Guy code, or the fact that you’re a “trad wife…” And the duty, honor, and privilege I have to acknowledge, Hell even before Breaking Bad, that “A Man Provides” and how I am trying My “Sweet Love.”

Ironic that I want to be as lustful as wanton, depraved as the Marquis de Sade. You married an effing sadist, baby girl. Yet I am as needy and as sensitive to say… My love…

Just sing to me Sade’s “By Your Side” or Peppermint Patty’s Poor Sweet Baby. That I am, love. Braxton and Virgil know this well enough.

I’ve called each one of them a little S.O.B. from time to time, which is technically true. But you are their stepmom (potentially). And I remember even calling you ‘that bit$h,’ you know from “Smokin Out The Window.” Maybe I should have taken off running.

Honestly, with what shoes? Again, that’s something for my therapist, Inspector Echo, tomorrow. B III would laugh his ass off. He hated wearing clothes. I’m just trying to keep 2-V on all four paws and provide for our family, which is why I suffered humiliations galore on Monday. “Close your eyes and spare yourself the view.” “Just A Man,” SIGH.

That I am, my love. How could I hurt you? By making you wear high heels? I like fuzzy socks.

But I still do like high heels or even sneakers. And long black boots. There are also stockings/thigh-highs and everything like those of that girl Hime from “Fechikano! And while we’re on the subject of blondes, weren’t we having a conversation about Soul Caliber and those blonde sisters? Beautiful blondes.

  1. Cassandra Alexandra Soul Caliber Series
  2. Sophitia Alexandra Soul Caliber Series
  3. Fiona Belli, Haunting Ground
  4. Ashley Graham, Resident Evil
  5. Cassie PIB
  6. Carly PIB
  7. Alison Angel,
  8. Hannah Harper, Porno

On top of being a sadist, I’m also a hedonist. My life is the pursuit of pleasure, where I will never partake in “The Long Walk” ever again. Braxton and my idea of Heaven, lying in bed surrounded by food. Pause… Paws, Braxton And Virgil

1892 Days Without B III, Day 1333 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 278 ~Braxton, Virgil, Eyeing FEAR~

WillLeave a comment

What am I seeing today? Shaking hands, gray hair, a tail tucked in. Even my girl’s promising words. The idea that I have at least a dollar. And that I was blessed from the waist down… Uh, didn’t I see it’s Easter Sunday? Braxton, Virgil, Eyeing FEAR.

Sunday, April 5, 2026

Journey 278 ~Braxton, Virgil, Eyeing FEAR~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… How long were you able to avoid me this morning? Boy, you did try till 10:30 AM.

Between taking a look at your “Enormous Penis,” Da Vinci’s Notebook, you are not, hah!

Then there is the loveliness that is Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. I know, dude, you’re the luckiest S.O.B. alive. Did you really just say that, my friend?

Seriously? And she lets you get away with talking about how much you wanted to eff Renee O’Connor, aka Gabrielle from Xena: Warrior Princess. Let’s say she wouldn’t be proud of what you did this morning. “The Magic Glasses” are real with AI, you know.

Surprisingly enough, because you haven’t lost money with silly things like doctors. You want to appreciate those last few dollars before you burn those, too. What’s a few more failures with these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Remember Me by Reese Taryn
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

This isn’t The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror VI (Attack of the 50 Foot Eyesores). “Just Don’t Look,” right? But FEAR is effing everywhere. It’s like effing Bird Box, I know.

“Dread it. Run from it. Destiny still arrives.”
― Thanos

“You can breathe, you can blink, you can cry. Hell, you’re all gonna be doing that,”
Negan, The Walking Dead

Thanos and Negan? Not exactly role models. “Role model, role models!” as Hannah Ivy said. Please don’t get started on hot English girls, or you’ll be staring at Cherry’s yabbos till noon. So sticking with your side of the pond as MAGA should’ve done… FDT.

“Sometimes there’s so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can’t take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.”
―

American Beauty? Like M Anime. Hopefully, if she does have your kid, they will take their mom’s looks. But that’s not the only thing. Be real, be real, real son. You’re “Not Afraid.” “I promise to focus solely on handlin’ my responsibilities as a father.” Before that, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

Because for now you’re only Braxton and Virgil’s Dad… The truth. And M Anime’s Papi…

What do your sons, M Anime, Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry, Hell, and even your Olds see in you, considering the bum you’ve become? All you see is someone truly terrified.

Jesus Christ! Funny you should mention him, considering it’s Easter Sunday. Would you find a man on the cross disturbing? That was Friday, right? You’d be watching the resurrection, but you didn’t want to get out of bed. Seeing is believing. And as far as a resurrection. Braxton died. FEAR never has. And you’re afraid to roll back that stone, to stare into The Mist, that you’ll miss 1956’s The Ten Commandments, Norton, all your porn…. Braxton, Virgil, Eyeing FEAR

1890 Days Without B III, Day 1331 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 273 ~Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code~

WillLeave a comment

Am I afraid I might die? I’d spend eternity looking for B. And my head is a cruel place, the 9th Circle will try its best. The fact that my son’s cold body was turned to ash. And with Virgil and my girl, “I See Fire.” Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code.

Tuesday, March 31, 2026

Journey 273 ~Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Even when I’m sick, skeevy, and especially when I’m scared out of my mind. Now?

Let me just say, I’ll feel ‘better’ when this effing month is over. I’ll love you more? I do that anyway. You know the man that you married. And every minute you choose to stay.

Preferably on your knees… I had to go there, didn’t I? Eww! But one more reason to like sex. You on your knees, hands and knees, bent over, on your back, on your belly, etc.

Seriously, am I so horny this morning after I… after we… um we’re “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit” Like Dennis Hof, I’m always looking for the next party until I’m ‘physically’ unable.

However, the question is how I feel today. Let’s stick with the physical. Dearest love.

Today, like most, I wish I felt like my Braxton.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Which one would you rather listen to? Me talking about how much I want to do you, my love… or fantasizing about us doing you, me, or us. Or me talking about doing myself so

So I can join my firstborn. How about Virgil still being here? And you? Our kids who may actually have a chance at joining the human race. And that in itself is “Killing Me Softly.”

Honestly, comedy comes in three, and today I’m waiting on three things with 99 Problems.

  1. I’m waiting to join my Braxton with bated breath
  2. I’m waiting for my existence to be utterly destroyed
  3. I’m waiting to do something to save myself somehow.

“We’re allowed to make a lot of mistakes in our lives, except the mistake that destroys us.”
― Paulo Coelho

“It’s an awesome feeling to know you are about to change someone’s life forever.”
―

Homer had the right idea. “Tomorrow When The War Began.”

And here I am crying again. Yes, I’m in pain, and like Katniss Everdeen, you pull the best move, you know. Am I sick to enjoy the pain I inflict on you. Or sicker to admit that I need you for my mental, physical, and emotional pain. It breaks the bro code, guy code, hmm.

Gale: I knew you’d do that

Katniss: How I didn’t.

Gale: Cause I’m in pain. That’s the only way that I can get your attention
― The Hunger Games: Mockingjay

To say that I long to fall as my B did. “Baby, I Love You,” just leave me the eff alone. And at the same time, I beg you to stay with me during this “Mad Season.” Or Hell if I run, to follow me. I’m sick one minute, but A Man Provides in the next. It’s the code, forever.

That’s what I promised. The way. Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code

1885 Days Without B III, Day 1326 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 271 ~Braxton, Virgil, Time Me~

WillLeave a comment

“Look at me, look at me, hands in the air like it’s good to be alive.” And not looking at my watch. Watches cost money. And what about the phone, the alarm clock, and B’s resting place? Better to face those than my own face. Braxton, Virgil, Time Me.

Sunday, March 29, 2026

Journey 271 ~Braxton, Virgil, Time Me~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And if you don’t know me by now. I hate you. Too harsh. I hate your face.

But the only thing I hate more than your face is the face of the clock. It’s across the room.

Why? I would rather look at the box that Braxton resides in on the nightstand. I mean, tell me I’m wrong. The picture frame that holds all your memories of him. The dog tag you wear has your favorite picture of you and your son. I swear I even put that up on Whiteout Survival. ‘Trust Me,’ and I don’t mean that in an orange turd type of way. FDT!

Anyway, having B III’s face somehow takes the hurt from your game team. Tartar heads!

Will there ever come a time when you don’t use a Starship Troopers reference? When you accomplish… Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Hometown Heat Wave: Book 2
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 002 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Would that put a smile on your face? First, don’t smile. Have you seen your teeth? And what about 2-V’s breath? Um, you would settle for knowing what the eff is wrong with V. He gave you a look this morning that says, “Figure it out.” The Walking Dead’s Siddiq.

Yep, by the time you realize what’s going on, you’ll be meeting B again, permanently.

And at what time did you think you were getting to Heaven? And if he’s loyal enough to you… Don’t ever question Braxton’s loyalty! He would be waiting for you at the gates of Hell. And what’s that look? Better than the one you gave as the clock ticked away, and grunted and moaned for M Anime. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

Like the idea that you can hold out until she really gets here. And even if Braxton and Virgil’s potential mom arrives, “Get Here,” if she can, what will you have to offer her, hmm?

I’ll say one thing: your movie, musical, and manuscript tastes blend all over. Being honest.

It’s like putting a clock in a blender and what comes out. Another mess of wasted time, and you drink it up. I mean, does it count if it’s love? It’s not like you love M Anime… Uh, do you? Could It Be I’m Falling In Love”? That’s the question you’ll ask during the week.

As you watch the clock hands spin around. Walk Virgil around the block. Rounds with M… Braxton, Virgil, Time Me

1883 Days Without B III, Day 1324 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 266 ~Braxton Bowl, Virgil Cup~

WillLeave a comment

You can’t pour from an empty cup. Inside the fridge… Empty Wendy’s, Zaxby’s, whatever those cheap Icee’s are at the gas station. And my empty head… Uh, which one? Kojin Taxi 2/Sex Taxi 5’s Kyouko Sakai. But feeding my boys. “Braxton Bowl, Virgil Cup”

Tuesday, March 24, 2026

Journey 266 ~Braxton Bowl, Virgil Cup~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? That means “Ready or Not,” I’ll give you everything and more. After 7? 10:24 AM

To be right on the money. For the Love of Money, as The O’Jays sing. How much does it cost to keep me, well us, in music, movies, and manuscripts, I wonder? I should really give it a think with this financial situation. “A Man Provides” even while Breaking Bad.

As bad as I was, keeping Braxton’s food and water bowls filled for years after his passing away. Euthanasia? Murder? Hell! It was only a year and some change, Sunday, January 31, 2021, Braxton’s gone. Saturday, August 13, 2022, Virgil arrives. But his own bowl…

Honestly, I couldn’t even do that for V, and I had a lot more cash. But an empty cup, love.

Then, what’s with all our two-legged Rugrats running all over?

And I love’em. I love you. Hell! I was walking Virgil this morning, and I swear I saw a brown doggo much bigger than him. My “Mind Playing Tricks On Me.” My eyes, to be specific. But I’m not dumb enough to believe MAGA. Eff the Cracker Hats and FDT. But anyway with Virgil, “so I grabbed him up and run him out of there,” like I was Forrest Gump. And here’s my point. Every day when I think I’m “All Out Love,” there’s more.

My love, I keep scooping, pouring, dishing it out. The AI says that the love I have for my two furry sons just multiplies to you, our two-legged children, to “A Whole New World that I’m existing in. Obsessing over.

You’re my “Obsession.” But it’s like “I Love You Too Much.” And that’s not a bad thing, my love, no, not ever. Hell! I love Braxton forever and always. But it’s like I was saying yesterday about choosing the wrong battlefield. I love you enough to love myself. Or try.

I hate myself. And as much love as I have to give you, my boys, our loves, and even more.

There’s nothing left for me. In pornographic terms… I’ve been thinking about Bible Black: New Testament, or was it Bible Black Only? Whatever! Anyway, it’s like those women draining that guy of his fluids. He has fun, but he’s left a shell. That’s me today. Love, it’s too much, I’m toxic… Braxton Bowl, Virgil Cup

“Water, water everywhere, and not a drop to drink.”
The Rime of the Ancient Mariner

1878 Days Without B III, Day 1319 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will