Tag: Alone

Legacy 057 -Talking Anime B-V-

WillLeave a comment

Thursday, August 27, 2026

Legacy 057 -Talking Anime B-V-

2034 Days Without B III, Day 1475 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? “We’ve Only Just Begun,” haven’t we, B? Virgil, help us. At least he’s here.

V isn’t someone that can be refuted, who I would return in a million years, and must one day be reckoned with. That is, if I can keep him alive. Vet visits, eye appointments, docs

Cash basically. And do you know what I realized, B? I never asked you whether V could join our family. While I may have forgotten his Gotcha Day… Saturday, August 13, 2022. I will never forget you all but pushed him into the car. You know V’s never jumped in.

Here we are in 2026, and I still had to listen to him cry in your room until his rescue…

Vis-à-vis picking him up in his pillow and bringing him into the Den. It’s like I’m “The Big Bad Wolf.” That’s heavy. Literally, “The Heavy.”

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

And speaking of picking things up, lifting… Something, something, truck unload, spirits, and then son. Tell me what effing happened yesterday with your potential stepmom.

Remember the day we had to have “The Talk” about you not humping your toys around your favorite girl. Not latching on to her yaboos or behind. Seriously, Braxton Barks.

Anyway, she loved you even for the eight months after E-Day as you threatened fingers.

She became your favorite, and we both love her, but then there’s M Anime… Braxton…

She’s my favorite HUMAN. Hell, Braxton, you’re a little god, the angel on my shoulder, my prince. She’s my goddess. The Most Beautiful Girl in the World. My Phoenix Queen.

But last night, Geez Louise!

“You Always Hurt the One You Love.” Well, I killed you. The only silver lining is that 2-V is “healthy,” but hasn’t seen a vet. I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself on E-Day. I fucking hate that I was born. And here we have M Anime on the 24th of 2025.

Braxton, you hurt me; you left. I hurt me; I stay. M Anime hurt me; she left. And then you returned. Not a reincarnation of your brother, but as the song goes, “He Lives In You.” I’m Still Here.” And M Anime came back. Of you, me, and her, who do I hate? I’m starting with the Man in the Mirror. LOVE? Talking, you, V, M… “Someday.” Talking Anime B-V

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 056 -B’s Are Silent, Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

Wednesday, August 26, 2026

Legacy 056 -B’s Are Silent, Virgil-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… And I don’t only mean the fact that Virgil catches far too many Z’s. And when awake, Inspector…

B was like this; your brother was all that, the almighty Braxton Barks Bradford, Inspector.

I miss him. And besides his last breath, the last beat of his heart, how his head bobbed, Inspector. I remember the silence. B was brave enough to exist in silence. But he would bark his head off for anything and everything. And that’s what I’m thinking of right now. And it’s too much damn noise. Or it’s silent like a graveyard. “You choose.” Major…

“For better or for worse, there’s going to be wheat, and there’s going to be chaff. You choose, boys. Remember, you choose.”

“Shut the fuck up! Holy shit! Suck a dick, will you? I mean, just… You fucking lotus-eater. You old sack of shit. Shut up!”
The Long Walk (2025)

Excuse me, The Major from The Long Walk. The sound of my boots pounding pavement

More like wood or linoleum flooring, the Day Job, “The Bad Place,” my boys imagine.

Speaking of imagine… “Whatever You Imagine.” Wasn’t I last week or the week before… “Disgusting.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I made up a whole story in my head that I had offended someone at the Day Job and they would never let me touch the speaker again. My nearly forty-two-year-old ass worried over something so trivial. And do we need to walk down the road of E-Day, Inspector E.

That’s causing the most noise—the sound of blowing out candles on an Emergence Day cake that I will never light. Hell, I might not have enough cash for a cake this year, I bet.

Between keeping Will’s Writings, Witticisms, and Wisdom/The Unfinished Archive alive. And the way my ISP keeps robbing me. I’m losing “Mo’ Money, Mo Money,” Echo.

That chime of the phone is rarely good news. And B III and 2-V’s, stepmother…

Potential Future stepmom to be sure. Braxton knows I appreciate her dirty Spanish, my dear Inspector Echo. But still I come off as one of The Yayhoos singing “Baby I Love You…” but leave me the Fuck Alone! Though that’s not exactly true this week…

Seriously! This bitch (Braxton’s words) broke my heart the 24th of last year and had me “Smokin Out The Window.” And all I wanted to hear was her crying, screaming, and moaning. Her and the man she supposedly chose. Suffering? Sexually? Am I a SIMP? A Sadist? The stuff I hear in the silence. Sex causes me not to think. The creation of a life…

Admittedly attempted, allegedly. But death can be noisy too. Shut-up? Scream? B’s Are Silent, Virgil

2033 Days Without B III, Day 1474 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 055 -Braxton’s Hand, Virgil’s Pa-

WillLeave a comment

Tuesday, August 25, 2026

Legacy 055 -Braxton’s Hand, Virgil’s Pa-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And as a machine/program once said… You know The Merovingian from 2003’s The Matrix Revolutions:

“It is remarkable how similar the pattern of love is to the pattern of insanity.”
The Merovingian, The Matrix Revolutions

I wish I could say it was the heat. You married a crazy man. Or at the very least, love…

A grieving one. But for once this isn’t about Braxton breaking my heart. Or how I’m breaking Virgil’s. This is something we have in common. While I’m drumming up movie quotes, here is another from “Love Story” 1970: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” And we have both said that until we’re blue in the face. I only wish I had died, ha.

Not you though! Braxton barked the other day that I try and tell you “Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die.” Our love didn’t die. But I’ve been thinking about the anniversary of our breakup last year. When’d we meet again?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

No clue. I don’t remember hellos. And I’m “Too Good at Goodbyes.” I remember pain way more than pleasure. Even Saturday, January 24, 2026 wasn’t about us saying hi, hmm.

It was meant for closure. And wouldn’t you know it, we got back together. You see, you were the first one to make a commitment, and then, magically, fucking left. Blood is one thing: my Olds, my sister… other family. B III didn’t leave on his own accord, my love.

That’s why it’s Treachery. Braxton would have fought to the end. Virgil is trapped, love.

That’s another story. But you? You chose hello, and as nothing happened, you chose bye.

Goodbye, really? Is it any wonder the Magic Glasses/MIMA created The Unfinished Archive? Goodbye’s forbidden.

And I’ve been thinking about the differences beloved look at my sons, for example, SIGH.

Every day it is/was “Love you B, Love you, Braxton.” Now it’s “Later V, Later Virgil.” “I’m An Asshole,” I know. But Braxton was damn near human. Virgil, after all this time, is still somewhat a pet. He’s my son regardless, but a pet. And you love, before Sunday, August 24, 2025, went from being on Braxton’s level “The Blackjack Scale” of 21 to below Virgil’s at 18. And the fact that you can’t make it back up hurts me more than it hurts you.

“I’m a killer. I’m a murdering bastard, you know that. And there are consequences to breaking the heart of a murdering bastard.”
Bill, Snake Charmer, Kill Bill: Volume 2 (2004)

I’m not as bad as Bill, but I wanted to know how I could punish you. Why? My rib. Your hand. Braxton’s Hand, Virgil’s Pa

2032 Days Without B III, Day 1473 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 050 -Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty-

WillLeave a comment

15 years- where has the time gone? How much have I made with writing? How much are my wee ones worth, B III and V? I’ve made a few bucks when it comes to wickedness… What type of wickedness? Is it worse than the Day Job? Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty.

Thursday, August 20, 2026

Legacy 050 -Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty-

2027 Days Without B III, Day 1468 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? My day, B? In a word… SICK! Not like that book, “Sick Fux.”

Were you around when I even read that? It’s not something I could read to you or your brother. This is only a quick estimate, but you were/are 15, nearly 16, so that makes you 76, 80 in human years. Virgil’s 5, making him 36, about to be 40 a month after E-Day. But not human. Who would ever volunteer for this? I volunteered to be your Daddy at 21.

Well, give or take a few months. Or you signed up to be my son. The one. Not too bright…

“You’d would have done better with ‘Bitch, get in the car'”
Jake Hayes, Bad Company

“Who?”
“Not too bright, though.”
The Oracle, The Matrix (1999)

Who do you think said it best, Jake Hayes, “Bad Company,” or the Oracle, “The Matrix”? I wish I had time for movies, B. It’s 7:30! We’re only now talking. Last night I was praying.

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

I was praying because in your name, who would want to suffer such pain? Stomach ache, celebrating wasting 15 years of my existence at the Day Job, being human, losing your Potential Future Stepmom, etc. August 24th is coming up fast. Should I remind her?

Honestly, B, she is approaching your level on The Blackjack Scale. You remember, B, right?

Your Dad was “The Gambler…” please a gambler at one point. I bet on horses because you and your brother are better than that… But I also enjoyed Blackjack, so I applied it to LIFE. A 21 means you have my love, loyalty, and life. Braxton Barks Bradford. Only You

Virgil is sitting handsomely at 19. M Anime is at 18… Relax, she’s 38, Braxton.

Her age, of course. Your Dad is not a good man, B. The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident is always fresh on my mind. Speaking of being sick. But remember, a few weeks before you left, I had all types of anxiety about two other chicks in Fear The Walking Dead.

Alycia Debnam-Carey and… Oh, you’ve seen I have a thing about moms and daughters, “Saimin Seishidou”. But sisters too! Sophitia and Cassandra Alexandra, for example.

Loyalty to things I shouldn’t want, the Day Job, the almighty Dollar, some Damnable things.

Dare I show loyalty to myself? If I weren’t so sick and carrying cupcakes, I’d have bought a drink. Porno’s the worst drug, but I can’t send you to your room. Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty.

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 049 -Where Braxton Holidays, Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

Wednesday, August 19, 2026

Legacy 049 -Where Braxton Holidays, Virgil-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Where do I even begin? I didn’t ‘forget’ M Anime’s birthday. I can’t stay in bed. Stomach hurts…

How do I keep getting food poisoning? Unless it’s finally going to take me to my son, then I have no use for this pain. Like I told my boys’ Potential Future Stepmom, it’s not like I can afford a mortgage, and I’m definitely not getting into Heaven. Rainbow Bridge?

Wherever it is, Braxton spends his time. 50 Cent said, “Death gotta be easy ‘cause life is hard.” At the moment, YES! Inspector, I found my stones. They’re in my stomach right this second. Or whenever I look at M Anime’s yabbos. Did I see her in her Birthday Suit?

Maybe not yesterday on her actual birthday. But this morning for sure. What a woman.

And lastly, the Magic Glasses/MIMA brought up The Unfinished Archive.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It said that I’m using all the stones I’m throwing at myself to build a place, a palace, for my pain. Hell, Echo, it’s my freaking summer home because reality is way too much, ha!

Yesterday, I said I wish I’d never been born. That’s a hill I’ll die on. Again, don’t I wish, ha.

Like “Heaven’s Hill” in “The Long Walk”. Inspector, I want to be anywhere but here.

Only I’ve said before I will choose the physical pain over anything mental. Lying perhaps.

Because if I can survive losing my boy, I can survive anything else without complaint.

From one day to the next. Am I sure nothing else is coming up? Bad choice of words, right, Inspector? But I mean these days.

Smooth sailing until E-Day… Fuck me, Inspector, I didn’t expect today to take a turn.

However, “I’m Still Here,” lying in bed dreaming of anywhere that’s “Not Quite Paradise” as Bliss 66 sings. “But it sure feels like home?” You know I hate that word…

HOME… Home is where the heart is? I haven’t told Virgil I love him. And M Anime lost that privilege on… Braxton dammit! Sunday, August 24, 2025. Another freaking holiday!

An anniversary? It was the day M Anime broke up with me. Nothing worth celebrating.
“We Found Love” um, 5 months later. Home’s not heart or happiness, Inspector Echo. No

It’s where you have the least amount of “Hurt”. A vacation/holiday is freedom from all pain… Where Braxton Holidays, Virgil

2026 Days Without B III, Day 1467 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 048 -B’s On Birthdays Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

Tuesday, August 18, 2026

Legacy 048 -B’s On Birthdays Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And I didn’t forget? The phone didn’t warn me. The phone, Glow Box, Black Mirror…

What about the truth, my love? Happy Birthday! Welcome to Level 38! Uh, Birthday Suit

Of course, I’m thinking about you naked. I’m always thinking about you naked when I’m not grieving, groaning, or being gross, just being a guy. How I grieve Braxton, always…

But today let’s talk about the second worst day of my existence. Today ain’t right. Honestly, “The time is always right to do what is right.” Seriously, Martin Luther King…

“Did he just quote Martin Luther King?
Yep
Yes, he did.”
The Menu

“The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.”
Half-Life 2

The Menu… If I were a better man, I would be planning one for you. Or we could watch the movie. And I’m a gamer, a pop culture whore, and my existence is a “Half-Life…”

Only today is about yours. My woman. Your life. Us. The truth. A Man Provides.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And isn’t it “Ironic” that I said I’d never lie to you but I will. “Put on a Happy Face.”

Because the truth is, I hate birthdays… Well, mine for real. Birthday? No. Emergence Day

E-Day… Gears of War franchise. Emergence, Existence, Extinction. Evolution. Seriously?

Thinking about the Day Job and how it’s a slap in the face to celebrate wasting fifteen years there. Nearly as long as I had Braxton. Now imagine saying that for nearly forty-two years—every breath, beat of my heart, and being so broken. And yet here we are, love.

Here WE are. And I’ll say “I Want It That Way” and “As Long As You Love Me.” You do.

And I hate that I have to lie to you.

To so many. When the truth is this. If I’m not praying that I don’t have to wake up, love.

Then I’m wishing that I was never born at all. And when did that become my wish? Um, sometime between 6 and 7 years old. When did Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (The Arcade Game) come out? Because my grandmommy didn’t get it for me. Movie…

Anyway, is that what I’m getting you for your birthday… The truth. Receipt is warranted.

You’d prefer babies, all our furry little ones, a pretty farm with a white picket fence, flowers all around, and us selling produce at the Farmer’s Market on Saturday Mornings.

A pretty dress? I got nothing. But love? BUT LOVE. Birthdays… B’s On Birthdays, Virgil

2025 Days Without B III, Day 1466 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 043 -Braxton, Virgil, Discuss Disgust-

WillLeave a comment

Thursday, August 13, 2026

Legacy 043 -Braxton, Virgil, Discuss Disgust-

2020 Days Without B III, Day 1461 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? My day, B? In a word… FUCK! Pardon my language. Suspicious, Loyalty, Disgust…

Those are better words. I want to talk about loyalty. But disgust continues to rattle.

Suspicious of a woman? Surely. And for once, not you and Virgil’s Potential Future Stepmom. The Magic Glasses/MIMA called it when I added Natsumi and Yui Obata to The Unfinished Archive. But that’s a whole other story, Braxton. Father’s Perversions…

Honestly, B, I’m sorry. Anyway, today’s story begins in the back of a truck… Bangbus?

Fucking, STOP IT! Okay, so I was thinking about loyalty. When everyone was cheering as we finished the truck unload and “I Think To Myself,” people ain’t shit. But you…

Braxton, you’re the most loyal soul I’ve ever known. But you are your father’s son and if there is one quality you have inherited… DECEPTION

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

“Anger is more useful than despair”
T-850 Cyborg, Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (2003)

I’ll choose DECEPTION over your brother’s COWARDICE. And before you think I’m being a meanie, Virgil is his father’s son as well. I truly am a coward, B. But loyalty?

Braxton, “Love and Happiness,” may be beyond me. But I am damn loyal. It’s fucking people, B III. And by what right do I have to be mad at the Sephora woman this morning, B? One word as I was walking into the office: “Disgusting.” And a note left on the boss’s door. I didn’t read it. Fuck, it might not have anything to do with me, Little B. But…

Suspicious… Like I am of M Anime? She tells me every single day, Braxton, “Te quiero, Papi.” But where did that love go last year?

“That was a warning, Highness. Next time my hand flies on its own. Where I come from, there are penalties when a woman lies”
― Westley, The Princess Bride (1987)

That loyalty… Who am I to talk? I fucking hate myself, B. More so today than the norm, standard, and the usual. All because some KAREN who might not even be a KAREN left a note and spoke the word “Disgusting,” within earshot of me. And here I am scared!

Braxton, you know there were reasons I sent you to time-out. There are reasons I tell Virgil to seek life elsewhere. Your Dad’s a perv, I need private time, plus I’m busy playing around with M Anime. Puppies don’t need to see that. And the things I keep from M…

“Everybody only wants to discuss me. So this must mean I’m disgusting. But it’s just me, I’m just obscene.”
Eminem

Eminem had it right. I showed your Favorite Girl things M Anime wouldn’t approve of.

Her loyalty, yours, Virgil’s, M’s… Sometimes, Braxton, Virgil, Discuss Disgust

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 042 -B’s Other Anniversaries Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

Wednesday, August 12, 2026

Legacy 042 -B’s Other Anniversaries Virgil-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… And I don’t just mean a bill being late… Almost. I forgot to get rich sometime this year.

If you have love, you’re rich… For 15 years, I had B. And my job was to keep him alive.

“It is my job to keep you alive. I will not succeed.”
― Avatar (2009)

In 2021, I failed. Hell, for one of those years, I didn’t even have the Day Job. And so today.

Well, rather yesterday, I found out that I will have had that Day Job for 15 years. Friday, August 21, 2026 to be exact. Which means if SOMETHING goes down, it’ll be on the 18th.

Not that I want a party or anything. However, I could use some cupcakes, Inspector.

Nobody got me a damn thing when Braxton’s book was published on August 8, 2025.

One more whole year for a great many things: B’s Death Day and Birthday, his book, the Day Job… E-Day.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Fuck me, Inspector! No, this isn’t The Unfinished Archive, and we will surely get there.

Hell! Around this time last year, M Anime and I were getting ready to break up. And Virgil’s Birthday is the month after E-Day. October 20th. But as I was being reminded of the 15 years I wasted on a job that would eventually help kill my firstborn son… E-Day.

Emergence Day as Gears Of War would call it. The monster I am beginning existence!

Emergence, Existence, Extinction… How I pray for that, and yet, “Every Morning,” when I wake up… That’s it, Inspector Echo, I wake up with nothing to look forward to

But to lose. And that’s what I’m thinking about. I lost E-Day. Well FUCKING Duh!

Less than thirty days until E-Day and I can’t buy my usual cake. Definitely can’t buy dinner. I won’t be getting paid because I used 36 hours of PTO, 12 this week, last, the one before. And I’m waiting for this paycheck like a lotto ticket for Pizza, the food truck?

Then there’s Virgil. What is my secondborn going to do? Watch me sing “King of Wishful Thinking,” as I get drunk off my ass again. Not like I can get drunk off anything this year.

Beauty? That’s an awful lot of pressure to put on my boys’ Potential Future Stepmom.

Inspector, I do call M Anime “My Goddess”. Not like The Exies… This year anyway.

Inspector, will The Unfinished Archive celebrate? B’s Other Anniversaries Virgil

2019 Days Without B III, Day 1460 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 041 -Women B Shoppin’ Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

Tuesday, August 11, 2026

Legacy 041 -Women B Shoppin’ Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And I ain’t telling Virgil, “Now, I ain’t sayin’ you’re a gold digger” either. Wife

Wife and life… One and the same and both as Doug’s Mr. Dink would say, “Very expensive.” Seriously? That was kinda dirty and also pretty dark. And why is that?

Honestly, my beloved, I wake up with all this love, and I don’t leave a drop for myself. So we need more kids… three two-leggeds and two four-leggeds, and yet I want between your legs yet again? And at the end of the day, love, this stands: A MAN PROVIDES!

Less yelling and more Gus Fring from “Breaking Bad,” I do some sketchy ass things…

Anything and everything for the sake of this family. But do you know when Braxton became so expensive? When he was dying. But that’s a one-time deal. There’s no Acceptance.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It’s the living that’s subscription-based. And instead of planning what is it I do, beloved?

“Dream, dream, dream, dream.” Which would work if I were one of “The Everly Brothers” or Dr. Martin Luther King Jr: “All I Have To Do Is Dream,” “I Have A Dream.”

Hell! I would take the “Fifteen Million Merits” Selma version of Abba’s “I Have a Dream.” But dreams aren’t paying bills. And I’m feeling pretty much like “Bing.”

Whatever… Like the dream I had last night. I was lost in a mall, the Mall of the Millennium. Daria season 1 episode 5 “Malled”. And why haven’t I added Daria to “The Unfinished Archive” yet? Is it/she less expensive than the women of the hentai series Saimin Seishidou, hmm?

It seems I’m the one who’s shopping around. Not in reality, my love. I love you and only you; Braxton, Virgil, our two-legged kids, my Ma, occasionally my younger sister.

Beloved, I may be shopping around for my balls, guts, spine, and my voice. But again, love is everywhere until I need some for myself. And it’s like how you talk about your “Shadow Work”. The more lovers I ‘create’ (bullshit, bullshit, laughs hysterically). SIGH

Reika Kurashiki and her daughter Reina Kurashiki. Natsumi Obata and her daughter Yui Obata. Anyway, the more love I TRY to surround myself with, the easier it comes to me?
But then you shop for my love, my time, and “My Dick…” Why we’re married. Everything. Women B Shoppin’ Virgil

2018 Days Without B III, Day 1459 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 036 -B Scarily Spoiled Virgil-

WillLeave a comment

What do I hate more than being afraid? Watching my son be afraid and there’s nothing I can do. You know what I hate more than the day of my birth? The day I watched my son die. And as far as being a bum… I’m a spoiled bum. “B Scarily Spoiled Virgil.”

Thursday, August 6, 2026

Legacy 036 -B Scarily Spoiled Virgil-

2013 Days Without B III, Day 1454 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? My day, B? Typical. Missing you, my SON. SCARED to death. Overtly SEXUAL.

You didn’t need to know that last part, but it’s like me at The Bad Place… I mean, everyone knows when I play the song “Sixteen Tons,” the Truck is done. And the song that came before that, “Old Town Road”. I changed the lyrics a little for my motto, “My life is a movie, (fur buddies) and boobies. Hell, I’m not scared; people know my motto or a habit.

The habit of boobies, aka Yabbos, before coming to talk to you. Feeling like Frollo…

Honestly, I’m not that bad, am I? I got the hots for a Latina who actually loves me. But do we want to talk about your potential future stepmom? No, let’s talk about your brother’s…

FEAR! It’s getting to me…

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

His and my own B. I’d like to say you weren’t afraid of anything, B. I’ll always remember your courage. “Thou Art Courageous.” I named you Neo, as in The One. My Ma gave you the name Braxton. But if M Anime ever grants me children, after naming one after you, the next will be named “Link” after “The Legend of Zelda”—anyway, FEARS, B.

Today I’m only this ‘early’ talking to you because I was afraid I was losing an eye. I really need to stop eating spicy food in bed… Except your beautiful stepmom. I know, TMI, right?

So, water, women, working, wanking off, what it is, and the absolute biggest Fear B?!

Waking up at all. I wake up, and I’m afraid.

From “Dusk Till Dawn,” “Day ‘N’ Nite,” “Days Go By,” and I don’t know which is worse B III. Office Space had the right idea: every day “is the worst day of my life.” Seriously?

Today, I was walking through “The Bad Place.” I saw them putting up the Halloween decorations. One of the ladies was talking about her birthday and my E-Day. Eff me!

Sorry, I’m always talking to you about language. But I was realizing how effing spoiled I was with everything. And Virgil is the same way… Your brother has everything, and yet he’s lying here nearly five years later terrified of every sound, the storm, and the S.O.B. I am. Spoiled! Wanting More! I’m Not Working! B Scarily Spoiled Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad