Gospel 203 ~We Will Go Home~

Last week I had no idea I’d be here. It’s Sunday while I’m writing this but ask me what I wish. Come this time Wednesday, I’ll be right here. My furry Imp napping, finally posting this, with YouTube in the background. We Will Go Home, I believe.

Wednesday, January 20, 2021

Gospel 203 ~We Will Go Home~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but honest to God, I would give it all up to be right here. What in the grand ole U.S. of A? I haven’t forgotten that today is Inauguration Day. You’ll have to forgive me for being a selfish S.O.B., not new. How about time-travel, hmm? It’s still Sunday, so I have traveled now three days into the future. Why. That’s the thing I can’t tell you, I’m not STUPID. I also know the laws better than Trump. Ok, at least I have the decency to look them up, unlike some.

Now, did I really say that I would give up a billion dollars to be in bed? Well, at the moment, on the loveseat in my den, going crazy with worry. I swear Inspector Echo, I haven’t written this much in ages and why. You know I can never do good, so yeah, Great Fear. It’s a Fear that I can’t share even with you and the girls. I’ve talked to Madam Justice, Dear Future Wife, and now you, again on a Sunday. I’m sorry to say, writing, blogging, yeah, graffiti with punctuation, doesn’t feel much like home. A rush to judgment, um, ok, yep. I might as well be sitting inside a prison already. If I’m here come Wednesday, I’ll still be scared. When I got carted off to detention so many years ago, geez. To think that would be my life for who knows how long and then like that, I was free.

Call it scared straight, Echo? I think I even gave my life to God at one point, eww. Who was it that said, a man facing a noose will do whatever to save his neck? Now back with my Olds, ok beat anything I ever knew of the Heaven, Paradise. So many names and such. However, I’m going to Hell one way or another. If I wanted to do good, and I mean now, make the world a better place, I know what I should do. You see something, say something. Trump didn’t call the F.B.I. and Inspector; let’s say we know our countries well. I want to congratulate President Biden and Vice-President Harris. Yet come this time Wednesday, I want to be here, the country at war or not. I’d take Status Quo Freedom.

Detention, Studio, Olds, or Day Job. We Will Go Home

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 196 ~Obsessive, Contagious, Addicted, Will~

A round of applause to the alarm clock, but you want to know what got me up this morning? Nope, and if I told the whole truth, well, I’d be as bad as whoever looked up such and such on my blog, finding nothing. “Obsessive, Contagious, Addicted, Will”

Wednesday, January 13, 2021

Gospel 196 ~Obsessive, Contagious, Addicted, Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but that can be forgiven or buys forgiveness. At the very least makes people forgetful. Of course, I apologize to you, my Dæmon, one day I should add my mother. Hell, sometimes I think about the whole world for being an addict. So what am I addicted to? What would I know about it in the first place? If anything, what am I sorry for today? Oh, let me add one more AHEM; why can’t I forgive myself? I should be thrilled right that I actually got up at 4:00 AM.

How did I spend the first forty minutes? Inspector Echo, it’s like keeping a bottle in the house. The man who tucks a cigarette behind his ear “JIC” (Just In Case). I’m like Pookie in New Jack City. Wanting to do good but putting me in a room with… everything. Inspector, I tell you all the time it’s how I want to spend my life. I want to produce stories, movies, “inspirations” like I’ve been looking up all morning. God, I want businesses that employ the likes of Alice Little and Jill Kassidy. The idea of that starts every morning. Jesus, it’s what I have to think of to keep from falling back asleep. It’s not that I don’t love reading, which I did after those first forty minutes. Now didn’t I say I love money, but that didn’t keep me at the Day Job for two more hours now, did it? I am incorrigible.

Only again, I keep saying it could be worse. Being 19 days in, I’m heading into my angry stage. You stay clean the first week, and it does get easier, but yeah, I’m still lost. So why am I laying all the guilt on now? Bringing up Alice Little, I’m still upset about her case. Now it could be the fact that, as you know, I’ve been cleaning out my phone. Then I found pictures of such and such. I did talk about A Different Alchemy by Chris Dietzel. Jeffery is still lamenting about the passing of his son Galen. Dammit, I could be keeping busy. Reading up on the loss of Alice’s livelihood. I should have headed her way long ago. Instead, I’m sick and twisted with many ideas.

At least it’s not Covid or drugs; still, I’m… remember positivity, Obsessive, Contagious, Addicted, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 337 ~My Mercy Prevails Over Wrath~

I’m not asking God for mercy, but maybe of all women, because they are all beautiful in their way, one is even going to be a cover model; if anything I should have mercy on myself for waiting so long writing. “My Mercy Prevails Over Wrath.”

Monday, June 3, 2019

Episode 337 ~My Mercy Prevails Over Wrath~

Eighty-Seventh Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now as the UNIVERSE gives us whatever we may desire. It may be the words to overcome an absolute fear. I read this morning all about the FEAR OF POVERTY shudders. Something else to overcome as if a Facebook post is anything to scare me. If you recall I sent the “Rainbow Girl” a butterfly and she freakin’ blocked me. So I sent someone else the Titanic “To The Stars.” What about this rule today or a rainstorm to clean my chair on the porch? Yeah, that’s a bit much?

Let’s stick with the rule, B III has been on punishment for breaking one of the laws. Now I have 365 I break always. I did the math, and I have twenty-eight episodes left for this year. Anyway here’s B III’s rules of this house:

  1. Never bite or even growl at the hand that feeds and protects you (Emergency)
  2. Answer when called, eight out of ten it is location, the other two meds and outside
  3. Stealing is not necessary, never be afraid to ask
  4. TRY not to crap in the house (Understandable Reasons, Sickness, Daddy’s Laziness)

As for his crime, as we speak, he broke rule two. He stayed barking at women and children rather than answer when I asked. What did I say about the Titanic? MILF Dos was cool with the Gif by the way. If I was as hard on myself every time, I broke a rule. I would pop myself with a rubber band at the Day Job. Indiana Gone and Cherry think I’m crazy denying myself, porn. I’m still not counting Patreon, and I did look up a particular actress sigh.

I don’t want to be my “old man” there were no rules, only OBEY and everything else was STUPID. As much as I enjoy Cobra Kai, I’m not one for the ideology of “No Mercy.” Do right by me and gain my loyalty, hurt me, and yes then I am one to be merciless. As a Dom the things I want from a “Handmaid” (yes I’m still watching that show). More from a submissive is my mercy to the world, as are my books, and desires in my head. Ask me of wrath, and I can name my father and the Day Job. Should I have MERCY on B III? My Mercy Prevails Over Wrath.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 292 ~William And Mr. Saku~

I told my father that I have a few different personalities, none of them would ever benefit him ever, a common enemy and all, so it is with my characters, a plethora of pornographic passions or people I hope I never see again. William And Mr. Saku

Friday, April 19, 2019

Episode 292 ~William And Mr. Saku~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Millionaire right now. A Chinese feast and I’m adding this to the list. An orgy with a plethora of Asian girls; relax. My story is getting pretty bad with my sexual fantasies, enough so that I needed to class it up somewhere. I mean “William?” You would think I have all the motivation I would ever need. I didn’t let the Day Job take this off day, so I should have done five thousand words. Only I was up in more ways than one.

Wake up at 4 AM try going to bed then. I was fighting between three stories, one being Hot Juicy Teacher a.k.a. Onna Kyoushi from last night. What can I say I’m a sucker for a good story? Okay, a blue/purple haired girl with amazing breasts. I am ashamed of that picture though. I usually don’t post things like that, not anymore but hell I made two gifs of Honoka Toudou so far, and I want to make more. Beautiful women bring out my inner artist. How many images did I cut from the MILF and her breasts? Of course, there’s the other MILF and a file of the Cosplayer. Worse though is the wrath of a writer you know. To this day Lady Sophia, do you remember why I got back to writing, just another girl? I made her the main villain in one of the novels. Another is witch jealous of her daughter. There is one more, an emo blogger, mother, and journalist.

Now you will have to excuse me, but I’m going to have to get a bit of work done. At the very least get to bed at a decent hour tonight. The first thing, organizing the five main characters that I have narrating the tale.

For Title In Progress:
0000 Will 12500 Will 25000 Will
2500 Alison 15000 Ember 27500 Wilcox
5000 Wilcox 17500 Wilcox 30000 Alison
7500 Ember 20000 Alison
10000 Genevieve 22500 Ember

First, off I see I miscounted this morning, counting my chickens before they hatch as it were. The power of “The Secret,” treating everything I want as though I possess it. Still like Forrest Gump said since I’ve come this far what about the chapters?

20000 Alison “Closed, Clothed, And We’re Coming”
22500 Ember “Break Her And Bought It”
25000 Will “Who Is The Perverted Proprietor”
27500 Wilcox “Bedtime Damsel Without Her Dress
30000 Alison “Sale On Sluts He’s Mine

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 158~Time Humiliates Again Will~

If you asked me my favorite sin, I would say Lust, my needed sin would be Wrath, and the one I most indulge in would be Sloth, then again check my search history right but speaking of history, I write still. Time Humiliates Again Will.

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Lesson 158~Time Humiliates Again Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
No Fear, it’s why I enjoy anger so much or namely one of the seven deadly sins “wrath” but which would you prefer that I drown in a lake of tears or that I burn in a lake of fire… least I’m warm.

Today let’s focus on three of the seven the first being WRATH because it’s taking over, every day it grows stronger, and I know honestly enough that anger doesn’t help anything but my fear. No, I’m not going to quote Master Yoda or some tired cliché but why do people only see the worst parts of me and then with their laughter, snickers, damn can we just call it human nature, they invite the monster out to play? How not to sound like a psychopath *ahem* see I can’t even say what I was going to because I need this job and for some reason, I feel someone is reading.

What about LUST, I recall talking about a woman I met recently on the Whisper App who could do nothing but yap all day at me but what did I think about her at the time? Well, there was time enough to lie and doesn’t that just show how powerful lust it, I hate hunters, I lied about my schedule and other things and why, because I wanted her, what kind of man am I? Not that she’ll know, she wanted to “hang out, ” and I already told her I was shallow, sins galore. Anyway we traded pictures last night, now isn’t it funny she suddenly shut up, and she can’t go out, not because she’s married of course but because someone needs surgery?

Not that I’m busy crying over her though I got off an hour early from work and after freezing thanks to the dog I climbed right into a warm bed and decided I live here now. Yeah, I couldn’t even get it up to go to my workstation, and I just slept most of the day away, waking up all shocked and surprised though I did manage to eat. SLOTH, a waste of time and that’s what all the sins have in common, they were a waste of time and how am I going about correcting this because sorry just doesn’t cover it Inspector Echo.

I am sorry though, I apologize, to you, to the world, to the future missus who knows I am better than this and to myself but Time Humiliates Again Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 116 ~Mercy Prevail Over Wrath~

My mercy prevails over my wrath or more like my fear because God help me if I have such confidence to express such anger other than slapping myself in the face over everything I feel. Mercy Prevail Over Wrath, from the Koran and The Walking Dead

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Lesson 116 ~Mercy Prevail Over Wrath~

Forgive Me Echo,
No Fear but how much anger will it take to drive it all out because I’m not sure I have enough, it may never be enough and why should I wish it to be? Maybe a better question would be why I feel such hatred anyway, is it hatred, and still why.

I might have mentioned to Lady Luna how much I despise being late, though I wasn’t late and this is for my day job which sickens me enough that body actually rejects anything for breakfast. Is it the fact that I’m so weak, you know if it came to writing a novel on my weakness it might be a few pages less than my fear? Am I angry that I am again found so inadequate, so worthless, that anybody can just be thrown into my job, or is it the fact that I’m so voiceless that my presence must be announced to the whole building because I can’t tell one guy that I didn’t get a phone call to come in and work earlier today.

Is it the fact that I want to hate one guy and yet if he were promoted over me if he became the boss as I said before if you can’t love and you don’t wish to hate, understand and that I do. Only that doesn’t erase jealously which again stokes my ire and something else I must apologize for “males shouldn’t be jealous, that’s a female trait” in the immortal words of Jay-Z but doesn’t that make me sound sexist. Hell, a word in the vocabulary I wish I could erase at the moment “SEX’ I am so weak, I am so tired, and not even sleep helped, but if it doesn’t, like duct tape you just need more.

I become more like my father which both scares me and angers me, disguise fair nature with rage right, hate the whole damn world and hide such fear and self-loathing but being in his head might be scarier than my own… nah. Isn’t that who I should apologize to most of all, myself, this is what this is all about isn’t it, apologizing for my past sins but today it’s just might anger and since I’m going in tomorrow I’ll have plenty more reasons to be sorry, going at all.

So I am sorry Inspector Echo, wish I could say I won’t ever hate myself, that my anger will dissipate but like Rick Grimes, I ask only this for tomorrow may Mercy Prevail Over Wrath.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 003 ~Freedom Responsibly~

Did I shout fire in a crowd, honestly I’m probably a lot worse than most “gentlemen” and that is saying a lot when I should probably be saying much less. Freedom Responsibly is there really such a thing anyway, and why wasn’t I when I could have

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Lesson 003 ~Freedom Responsibly~

Hey Lu,

This isn’t free you know, binding you to me, as I’m bound by emotions, chief among them being anger but didn’t I say that anger would not be tolerated? What else is there, right the stuff we’re not allowed to talk about because there is no freedom here I know.

Can’t stress this enough my Lady Lu but this is all my fault because I was practicing the freedom of speech and in so doing I trampled on another person’s freedom. That person then used the same rights in their freedom and here I find myself bound and why is that… because she and everyone else is right. If anything I can tell you the truth quite simply in a song that I heard once and that’s “Freedom Ain’t Free”

You know what the difference is between a patriot, a traitor, hell even a terrorist… the winning side but there is something that, excuse me, trumps all that and that is power. That’s been the problem for most of my life, power or more so the lack thereof but really what power does some woman have over me I ask you. The answer is I’m still here talking to you, that after years of zero contact I turn to you, even today of all days when all I really want to do is rest now.

One more freedom I have been denied and I do mean that in a scary way, we talked about one of the reasons it’s good that Braxton is always around. So let’s go with why I wasn’t using my freedom responsibly and that in itself could go on forever, starting with the simple fact that I’m not free for real.

Now Lu I’m not planning on making some big social commentary on race or the state of this country, just one more thing we’re not allowed to talk about. I’m angry about that, you are damn right I’m angry but for a few hours at work today that anger wasn’t at myself, we both know who I was angry at.

Which leads me back to power, would I give my freedom away for power, to be slave to the almighty dollar, not like I’m not already, to be beholden to the people, if I could turn those people my way sure, what about to be addicted to my baser urges, does revenge count? Power is the end all be all I think but you only want more and more, and don’t we mistake that for the freedom that we all seek. Star Wars both Jedi and Sith have no freedom but then the question becomes what exactly is this thing people would dare call freedom.

“Freedom (n.): To ask nothing. To expect nothing. To depend on nothing.”
― from Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead (1943) Goodreads.com

So what have I been asking for, forgiveness, I’m not even sure I want or deserve it and to be honest with myself and my crime I did have ulterior motives. I don’t expect to gain any of it but I’m here because isn’t there always hope, maybe the hope that I will forgive myself or of something I don’t even have a name for. I also can’t believe how much I depend on other people’s good opinion about me, I don’t want to really meet these people but I want to believe that they think some sort of good for me and maybe that’s what hurts me the most.

A free man would walk away, a free man wouldn’t be bothered, a free man would do as he wanted even if that meant betrayal. Today of all days isn’t that what the founding fathers taught, I was once a history buff but they betrayed, it was downright treacherous and isn’t that what they call the ninth circle of Hell.

I gave into the second circle and because of this where do I find myself now the fifth circle which is Wrath but no not like that. If anything that’s what I wanted today, the freedom to be mad, a part of me has been thinking about expanding all this, to think I was on death’s door just yesterday right.

Didn’t Facebook get started because of somebody’s wayward heart or so were the rumors and I think Zuckerberg has freedom. Ayn Rand’s vision of freedom I don’t think will ever exist and in truth what would I do if I had freedom, the most freedom I could imagine this moment again is going to sleep and not worrying about anything. Now power is a dream that can come true and that’s me being hopeful because again power is all that really matters and if you want my two cents on love at the moment the power of love pales in comparison in the freedom not to do so I think.

“Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety.” Benjamin Franklin

This is what I’m doing right now Lady Lu, trading in my freedom, for what, people’s approval, a chance at something better, and of course my own fear. I could just want some moment of sanity and I’m sorry to say I would give up my freedom for that, you remember that show Solitary, in captivity those people might have actually grasped freedom. Again I’ll tell you, give me the power to do all that I may desire, to be angry, to be spiteful, revengeful, to do everything and all and I would gladly surrender whatever freedom I might have.

I don’t want to Freedom Responsibly because I can’t, I know enough not to break any laws, you can relax but for now, let’s just settle on being angry. That’s power, that’s why I’m here Luna to one day have that and to never need to worry about Freedom Responsibly.