Meditation 005 ~Virgil And This B~

“That thing unnerves me. I think that one day, artificial intelligence is going to kill us all.” – Queen Ramonda. Or how I feel about having a smartphone. But I’ve done worse things. Ask my boys Braxton and Virgil. Oh right… Virgil And This B.

Saturday, July 6, 2024

Meditation 005 ~Virgil And This B~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… I have a better chance of seeing Braxton again in this life or the next. Lunalesca…

B, as usual, stands for my son, Braxton. I swear he woke me up this morning around 1:20 AM. While you’re wondering why I’m calling you so late. It’s only 6:57 AM. I also planned to write some more about M Anime’s Nightmare. I’m up to 2700 words right now.

But you know me. Anytime I’m feeling down… well, worse. I think about my Braxton. Lunalesca, if I can exist without my son, I can “Endure and Survive” anything. My son B was my anchor, my reason to keep going.

These Meditations are proof of that, though this is only the fifth one. Braxton has been here since I first came to this place. He was here for Lessons. He died during the Gospels. Virgil “arrived” during the Sagas. So, the Chronicle year was the one I was alone for.

What does any of this mean? I lose myself when speaking about my boys, Lunalesca.

That’s the point because today is a bad day. Comedy comes in threes, Lady Lunalesca.

Buttons, Broads, and Bucks, Lunalesca…

So a couple of days ago, Lunalesca “Girl, I’m spending my dimes, wasting my time.” It was in the Regal App. Or at least that was the plan. But now it’s not working for me. Today I really wanted to see MaXXXine. I even set up an alert for it. But the app won’t work. I was going to get a free popcorn and a soda, too. But if I go now, that’s thirty bucks.

And it doesn’t solve the problem that the phone sucks, and after Everything with Dish…

This B… got me Smokin Out The Window. I’m going to need a new phone. Okay, and how am I going to accomplish that? Even if I could ignore my Old Man. The expense, Luna.

Braxton sent this song to me this morning. My boy will always know my buttons. However, I am still trying to figure out what to do. I’m thirty-nine, and I have no clue. Lunalesca, please?

Everything! And I do mean Everything is making my head hurt. And my heart, Luna? It remains broken. I’m struggling. I’m lost. Still in bed…

While M Anime was having her nightmare. I dreamed that Braxton was standing on my chest. Again, he was waking me up. My son wants to bring me back to life. But was I ever?

Fearing, Failing, and effing about. But Virgil And This B

1252 Days Without B III, Day 693 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 364 ~Virgil Will B Happy~

What would have made Braxton happy was not good for him. I could have told the vet to pump him full of drugs that would make him dive face-first into his food. But that’s not what happiness is. The dictionary skipped it. As did I. Virgil Will B Happy

Saturday, June 29, 2024

Tale 364 ~Virgil Will B Happy~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Or at least I was until I spent forty dollars on Virgil’s medication. Uh… What (BLANK)!

If only Braxton knew what that was like. What about some lady friend of mine… Lunalesca, there’s M Anime. But I still think about Cherry’s Yabbos. And that’s the thing. I tell myself that I’ll gladly pay for some woman sans her clothing but at the end of the day… Well, I misspelled healthy because, hopefully, Virgil will be with his medicine. But B had some meds of his own for his heart. And kidney failure took him from me.

So, as the song goes, “I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad.” But it’s not even that, Lady Lunalesca. And, happy? It’s just a word. A word that eludes me. It’s not getting any easier. But with my Little B III?

Whatever I was with him… I want to be that again. Instead of joining him?

I’m trying to avoid that, Lady Lunalesca. Which is another reason I bought Virgil’s medicine. Now, there’s no medicine for what I have. Sleeping pills? Do you want me to join Braxton today? I was planning on going to the movies. Strange, I’m sure, but that won’t make V happy. Ha! So we have meds, me going to the movies. A woman’s mammaries? For sure!

B had all that when his “honorary” aunt was around. Braxton couldn’t stand the maid. However, I didn’t want her standing either. Kneeling? Is that all I can think about? Lunalesca, I’m trying to find a reason to get out of this bed other than Virgil being hungry, healthy, or helpless. Happiness never factors into the equation for me, Lunalesca.

Hard, Horny, Horrified, that’s existence. Braxton Barks Bradford deserves happiness. Virgil Vivi Bradford? Their full government names. My only “sons” so far in this world.

Lady Lunalesca, I find myself in a world that doesn’t bring me joy, a world that makes me yearn for Tyrion’s wish for his Ending:

“In my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly full of wine and a girl’s mouth around my cock.” ― Tyrion Lannister

Even then, Lady Lunalesca, would I find happiness? If I could go to bed at night feeling proud of what I accomplished in the day. But I’ve squandered this one, and it’s only 10:00 AM. I was up at four. And what was I doing? Would I be happy if it was something productive? I’m only relieved Virgil didn’t force me out of bed. But since he was here, I could only read. So, hooray…

Naughty books, M Anime’s dreams, nightmares… Virgil Will B Happy

1245 Days Without B III, Day 686 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 357 ~We’ll B Lying, Virgil~

I know the truth when I see it. Sigh. The Man in the Mirror says, “I’m not happy.” Virgil’s eyes ask, “What did I do wrong?” A couple of women are thinking, “Eww!” So, I’m not lying when I say I want to sleep a little longer. “We’ll B Lying, Virgil.”

Saturday, June 22, 2024

Tale 357 ~We’ll B Lying, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… And with all I want, whatever it takes to bring Braxton back, my wrath, and women.

Lying here asleep would be in the top ten. It might land right under bringing back my son. And if I didn’t have a billion, it would be under-joining my son, B. Like this, Lunalesca:

I Don’t Have A Billion

  1. Be The Person Braxton Thinks I Am
  2. Join Braxton On The Rainbow Bridge
  3. Sleep Longer… If Possible

I Have A Billion Dollars

  1. Bring Braxton Back From The Grave
  2. Save The World…
  3. Rule From Bed

Which is where I find myself today. The things you can do on a full stomach and an empty… That’s something else I’m lying about. I’m sure I told Madam Justice about reliving some tension as I gazed at a particular girl the other day.

I can’t stand lying. But I don’t care to lose either. I swear, Lunalesca, I could join a particular political party. But I refuse to be the next Clarence Thomas, Tim Scott, Byron Donalds, or any other sell-out. But isn’t that a lie as well? For the right amount of money, Lady Lunalesca. No! The things I would do for Braxton’s life. Anything! Everything! Lunalesca.

But it wouldn’t even take all of that. Yesterday, all I wanted was a steak and baked potato… And pasta and lobster. But haven’t I been saying that I’ve been broke all week? My Lady.

Yet I bought everything you see and the book Backyard Dungeon 12. Lunalesca, I keep saying I make bad financial decisions. First World Problems Sigh.

So I can tell the truth when I want to. But every day, I have to lie more, Lady Lunalesca. Whether it’s the words that come out of my mouth… One more reason I would rather be alone with my boys. Braxton or Virgil? Braxton wasn’t a liar. And that Lunalesca is a comforting thought. My son would show you exactly what he thought. I don’t know about 2V. Awkward?

As we both lie here, Lady Lunalesca, I can’t help but feel a deep longing for solace. Virgil looks to be content, but I wonder if he truly is. I tell myself I don’t want to join Braxton, but the world outside is filled with lies. The truth is a luxury we can’t afford. It seems… We’ll B Lying, Virgil

1238 Days Without B III, Day 679 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 350 ~Spacing B And V~

You can’t take the sky from me. Or there’s, “Just look up. There is no place to hide. True love doesn’t die.” I swear, the things I remember about my B, and then I space out logging in. I long to be wherever Braxton is. But here I am. Spacing B And V

Saturday, June 15, 2024

Tale 350 ~Spacing B And V~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… but that’s only part of the dream, Lunalesca. There’s unconditional love. A woman, children, and dogs…

And I should stop lying. Lady Lunalesca, I want to be involved in the ‘Stuff & Thangs’ regarding women. By this, I mean activities like Cosplay, Filming, and even Brothels… I remember Dennis Hof and his dog Domino. Speaking of dogs, there’s a reason my Braxton didn’t have any siblings until after he passed. Keeping up with two, Lunalesca… Was I really going to say that Virgil is enough for me? He tries a lot.

Braxton though… Ask me where my heart is. How about what I would sell my soul for, Lu? And there’s another part of me, a dirty and “sinful” part, that I wish I could give up. It’s a part that brings me pleasure, but I don’t believe I deserve it.

But as forgetful as I’ve become lately, I’ll always remember Yabbos. In particular, Whitney Wright’s Yabbos. That’s who I was DMing this morning, anyway… Really?

Why do you think I share my feelings with you, my Little Braxton’s “Spirit,” and the Man in the Mirror? Because I feel stupid and old. I’m becoming forgetful. And I space out, Lady Lu.

Take yesterday, for example. I forgot a simple login for something I use every day, Lunalesca. It slipped my mind, and it’s not the first time. This forgetfulness is becoming a regular occurrence, and it’s worrying me. But afterward, I was able to rattle off a plethora of movies that I wanted to watch again. Before that, there was OnlyFans. Like I’ve said, I have been around. One problem though…

Yeah! I forgot that I didn’t have any money. But that didn’t stop me from remembering “Prom Night.” Not “my” prom, but the Whitney Wright film. And that’s where the last of my OnlyFans account went. Don’t forget to cancel…

It’s like my mind is the universe. Uh! Lu, I give myself way too much credit but hear me out.

Braxton, my son, was my Sun. Everything went around him. But without B III, Luna.

Now Virgil drifts between being a new sun and Mercury. He’s far from the light I need, but sometimes he keeps me warm. But Lunalesca, the black hole… Braxton’s passing is a constant source of grief that I can’t escape.

Women are from Venus, right? They’re hot and dangerous. And between me and my boys…

Earth is me. Again, I give myself too much credit. And again, I’ve been spacing out. It feels like I can’t breathe, Luna. And I’m not sure I want to. I can’t remember how sometimes.

I could continue. The black calls… Spacing B And V.

1231 Days Without B III, Day 672 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 343 ~Virgil, Better B Better~

The last time, I was the “best” at something. I got $40.00! And I’m paid so little I didn’t notice it on the check. I didn’t know until the end of the month when I was told to sign the paperwork. To be a better Father, Friend… Virgil, Better B Better

Saturday, June 8, 2024

Tale 343 ~Virgil, Better B Better~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Finding out that poor people are getting money. Trump didn’t get elected. Riding to the Titanic…

In other words, I’m sad. I’m suffering from Bipolar Disorder… Where’d I get a PhD? Lunalesca, I’m a father still mourning and/or grieving my fur child. My son, my Braxton.

I’m sure there’s an explanation of the differences between mourning and grieving in many books on loss. But not in the Hannah Bennett title I finished this morning. And if you’re asking why I’m so late. It’s 9:40 AM. I woke up around 2:30ish with all the lights on. I’m still one of those Wake Up at 4:00 AM types. So, I finished Hannah’s book and then moved on to Logan Jacobs. Oh yeah! I’m on day one again after falling to some P.Y.T. Sigh.

As if (pulls out list) Night Elves, Half-Demons, Orcs, Goblins, Spirans, and Succubi are better.

Drama is one thing, but crazy is something else. I’m trying to keep that to a minimum, Lady Lunalesca. Save that to the fairytales. Yeah, Tinkerbelle… “Where Is My Mind?”

Lunalesca, it shouldn’t be in another book about crying over furry angels. And yes, I know you’re not Lady Sophia, “my librarian.” Today, I’m trying to figure out why I feel heartbroken again. It’s not like it ever stops. But I could handle it till a few days ago. Again, I’m reading about “pet loss,” but I’ve done that plenty of times. Nothing works. And as I’ve said, I’ve fallen asleep to find the house bathed in light. I’ve missed dinner at least twice. I find myself getting angry. RAGE

RAGE beats FEAR, no doubt. I keep reading about The Five Stages of Grief. Acceptance? Lunalesca, we’ve established I’ll never reach that. Tiptoeing with the idea, but as far as…

“May I Have This Dance?” Never, Lady Luna! I absolutely positively refuse. Not B III. I refuse to accept that he’s gone, that his memory is fading. With all my might, I will hold on to every precious memory, bark, and wag of his tail.

And that’s why Virgil Vivi is not better. Because I’m not better. The day I got him is coming up in a couple of months “Gotcha Day.” I still remember spotting the three black dots along Virgil’s back. The brown around his eyes, the color of Braxton’s coat. “Braxton’s bark” of, “I couldn’t make this more black and white. Bonus points for using puppy pads.

Lunalesca, I should be making Virgil’s life better. Braxton’s? My existence? Virgil, Better B Better

1224 Days Without B III, Day 665 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 336 ~On Braxton’s Time, Virgil~

A great man once said, “We live and die by time.” Another said, “I am a meat popsicle.” But who has time to watch movies? Listen to music? Read the works of Marcus Aurelius. And write my own manuscripts. I got my boys. On Braxton’s Time, Virgil.

Saturday, June 1, 2024

Tale 336 ~On Braxton’s Time, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Or I would be if I did everything I told Braxton about. 1217 Days? Geez, Louise!

Who am I talking to, Lady Lunalesca? Better yet, what am I trying to say? And do I have time to say it? Again, if I go back three years ago and some change. Change? I can’t forget about the money. Can I afford to say what I want to say? That’s the thing my son “B” is priceless. And the other one? What, “V?” He’s still waiting for his time to shine, Lady Lu.

Dime, Crime, Time. The rhyme…

But no, Lady Lunalesca, I’m not trying to be a rapper. A hip hop artist. What about a repairman? Between DISH Network and everything being broken around here… A veterinarian? Well, Virgil is alive, but not Braxton. An adult star? Please! Anything for a dime.

When “I need a dollar, dollar. Dollar, that’s what I need.” Whether rhyme or crime, I gotta get mine. So, what crimes have I committed so early in the day? Well, other than wasting time. And we’ll get to that, Lady Lunalesca. But there is one thing I’ll never forget.

My son is dead. Euthanasia.

One of the reasons I’m talking to you so early is that PetSmart opens at 9:00 a.m., and V needs food. Now, wasn’t I out yesterday? And I didn’t pick Virgil up any? THINK Man!

“Is it a Crime?” What, to be so lazy, a loser, and let’s not forget lewd. On “X” earlier, Lu…

I was looking up pictures of Sophitia from “Soul Calibur.” No time for adult passions.

Am I classifying myself as an adult? A great man once said, “I am a meat popsicle.” But this is not the time for jokes. The earlier I get to PetSmart, the less likely I’ll run into the people from whom I adopted Virgil. 658 Days of his life wasted with me. Times a beast.

Yesterday, that’s what popped into my head. The five months I’ve trashed coming into my fortieth year on this Earth. If my favorite number (snickers) is 15. That’s how old Braxton will always be. Then the worst number is 40. Time enough, at last, Lunalesca?

You’re asking me for what? I don’t know. If I could be a father again. A rich fiend. Have a family. On Braxton’s Time, Virgil.

1217 Days Without B III, Day 658 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 329 ~Virgil, They’ll B Complaints~

I’m not one for swearing… Uh, bullies, the bedroom, and that boy in the mirror. No! That’s what I call complaining. And there are so many things today. And without Braxton. I turned the “bucket” over. But they’ll return. Virgil, They’ll B Complaints.

Saturday, May 25, 2024

Tale 329 ~Virgil, They’ll B Complaints~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Which means I shouldn’t have a single thing to complain about. But until that is so…

What? I’ll become a great writer and then orator for my audiobooks. I could make thousands on OnlyFans. Yes, Lady Lunalesca, I got a chuckle from that, too. I can’t keep a straight face… Excuse me! Yes, I can keep a “Straight” face. And what about my O-face, my lady? Your visage alone has got more than one from me. But how many times did I think about “stuff and thangs” this morning? Oh, too, complain about so much beauty…

“Oh, woe is me!” That’s my usual, and it’s a heavy burden that centers around my son Braxton. Who do I turn to about my B III’s passing? The Day Job and the Man In The Mirror. No! I find myself pouring out my heart to everyone, unable to contain the weight of my grief.

And it must get annoying. Not that I care, Lunalesca.

Please! You’re not Inspector Echo, but the secret is this. It matters a lot. This explains why I’m trying to get back into the world… I suppose. Well, as much as book reviews and OnlyFans will allow. Of course, I grow bolder when I haven’t been… “Taking care of business,” per se. And that makes everything so much worse. But sigh, not today, Lady Lunalesca.

Or that’s what I told myself anyway. And for the record, there’s nothing extraordinary about today, Lu. I should go shopping, but there’s “WWE King and Queen of the Ring.”

It’s so hard, Lady Lu, but didn’t I say to “someone” that this is the reason I have bad teeth?

A lesson in keeping my mouth shut. I need to.

“The mouth is the front gate of all misfortune.” I read that in “The Gargoyle.” And speaking of books, I need something new. As a matter of fact, I need to get back into the habit of lying on the loveseat and reading. Braxton and his honorary aunt, Lady Luna.

That was my therapy. And I can’t complain about those days. Those were good times.

But even if I were to start complaining right this second, what would be the point, Lady Lunalesca? It’s like listening to some politician. But Steve from Blue’s Clues makes everyone feel “we gon’ be alright.” Complaints should go with my cries and my useless excuses. Yet I sent Braxton to the Rainbow Bridge. Virgil lives. Virgil, They’ll B Complaints

1210 Days Without B III, Day 651 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 322 ~What’s Plan V, Braxton~

Didn’t I say something about my teeth last week? But I have no plans to go to the dentist soon. My father would just knock all my teeth out anyway. And not let me join my boy on The Rainbow Bridge. But Virgil’s still here. What’s Plan V, Braxton

Saturday, May 18, 2024

Tale 322 ~What’s Plan V, Braxton~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… But it wouldn’t even take that much to save me. And yes, I do need saving.

But before the holy rollers get all HAPPY… Eww! I’m not talking about having faith. Lunalesca, I believe in a Higher Power. As I know, my son, Braxton, has a soul. And my son deserves to be in a good place. Or he’s saving me a spot by the fire… NO! I only want HAPPY things for Braxton. I swear the word HAPPY is creeping me out. But what’s left?

My father? And no, Lunalesca, I don’t mean the heavenly sort. I’m burning up here. However, this fever won’t break anytime soon. I’m sweating with all the FEAR, Lady Lu. I’m trying to summon up the rage, righteousness, and pure unadulterated revulsion. Yes, my lady, I am almost forty. And I fear my father more than anything. Please! God, Lunalesca!

And it’s all over a STUPID satellite company. My father’s voice is filling the silence.

Because wrapping myself up in B III’s hoody and taking Virgil outside is doing nothing. Didn’t I say before the only time Virgil makes noise is to cry? He’s only following my example, Lady Lunalesca. Virgil is learning to live with these circumstances… with me.

So, as I plot and plan, failing pathetically each time. Why do I continue, Lunalesca? I am catching up on wrestling. Uh, I finished Bikini Nights earlier this morning. Stories.

Lunalesca, I’m always watching, reading, and dreaming of those who prepare, provide, and do a whole lot of “poking.” I did mention I’m all hot and sweaty peeking at por…

Never mind. What’s my plan?

Today, I need to go out shopping. Okay, with what money? “People on certain substances” don’t let that stop their habit. So, how can it stop me from buying groceries?

But if you mean over the next few days, Lady Lunalesca. I’m ready for next week with writing to the girls and Braxton. I can watch wrestling and read still.

Dad, though? That is where the rubber meets the road. Can I wait until Monday? That will already be a bad day. And what about Virgil? Welcome to Planet V.

And I don’t mean Venus or some softcore flick. Lunalesca, Virgil deserves to be happy. I’ll ask myself to Be Not So Fearful. Mice and Men. What’s Plan V, Braxton?

1203 Days Without B III, Day 644 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 315 ~Braxton and Virgil DISH~

Dish, gab, spill! Every day I exist, I realize why I was cursed… uh, blessed, with bad teeth. Everyone TELLS me to talk, and when I do… I understand why Virgil is so quiet until I leave. And Braxton would bark at everything. “Braxton and Virgil DISH”

Saturday, May 11, 2024

Tale 315 ~Braxton and Virgil DISH~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Sigh. As far away as I am from that “goal.” I still want my own channel.

Pure Taboo meets Reagan Kathryn, Jessica Nigri, Court Carmody, Mariah Mallad, Jahara Jayde, and I could go on. And I could do so much MORE, Lady Luna. I’m still shocked.

My world feels shattered, Lady Luna. I’m overwhelmed, so I find solace in the world of cosplayers and streamers. But I’m not ‘streaming’ all over the place, Lunalesca. You know.

This DISH Network situation is like my Braxton. You don’t know what you got till it’s gone. Did I ever mention that Braxton liked to watch wrestling? I don’t remember who fought the night of Friday, January 29, 2021. That’s when I found out that my firstborn son was dying.

You don’t know how badly I wish I could follow him this day. And why? To dish with my father.

Remember the song ‘Dance with My Father?’ That’s all Braxton wanted to do, Lady Lunalesca. And yet, I’m filled with fear when it comes to talking to my own father. Why? Because I always feel like everything is ‘my’ fault.

Name three things that are mine: Braxton, Blame, and the Bed. Trust me, Lady Lunalesca, with as much time as I spend here, it’s mine. Even Virgil knows that. Whenever Virgil knows I’m about to fall asleep, he jumps out to find other accommodations. It makes me wonder, Lunalesca. He stays away from B’s bed. Smart! He jumps out of mine at bedtime, Lady Luna.

I’m supposed to read on the loveseat and watch TV from bed unless Braxton’s Aunt is here. And Braxton wouldn’t mind her joining us in bed. Braxton wanted a mom.

That’s one more promise I couldn’t keep to Braxton. As a Dad, I failed him. I didn’t have much of a chance at being a husband. And as a man… Nope, I’m calling my father.

Lunalesca, it could be worse. I could disturb Ma, but tomorrow is Mother’s Day. Sigh.

It always comes back to money. I don’t have anything I could give Ma. Braxton?

Grandbaby that he was because, again, look around. The fence he once guarded is falling across the yard. The very floor he once walked on I destroyed with fear, Lunalesca.

Even the TV he watched… No Raw, NXT, or Smackdown. And when his Dad isn’t reading. I watch Raven, Lulu, Aerith… “Relations.” The failure, THAT’S ME! Braxton and Virgil DISH

1196 Days Without B III, Day 637 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 308 ~Don’t B COOL, Virgil~

Is being into “Pop Culture” cool? My son B was a pretty cool dude. And now. Well, he’s not in the cold, cold, ground… V wasn’t very cool until I cut on the AC. Finally! I was cool enough when my father blamed me for something. “Don’t B COOL, Virgil.”

Saturday, May 4, 2024

Tale 308 ~Don’t B COOL, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… In my dreams, Lady Lunalesca. The things I could do with ‘cold hard cash.’ But I remain in bed, grappling with the reality of being broke.

“Some of you love sleep more than you love success.” Lady Lunalesca, I love Braxton. Where would I be if I loved everything the way I love my firstborn son? But no. My tears keep me cool, or so I thought. And I’m headed towards the Ninth Circle, regardless, Lu.

Another way I realized or remembered how to be cool… I need only talk to my old man. The fear he instills in me, the fear of being the source of his ire, chills my blood and paralyzes me. Even when I’m not to blame.

Then there’s this morning. Even when I’m not flipping through actual book pages, Lady Luna. I still ended up buying three for twenty-two bucks. And so, what now, dear Lu?

I swear my brain is a block of ice sometimes.

But at least I know what today is. Star Wars Day? WWE Backlash? Braxton’s Aunt’s Birthday! She’s turning thirty-four. To think. I’d miss being that young, with all the possibilities and dreams. But now Lu.

First thing… no, second, maybe third. I missed B III and then had to take Virgil, the other furry kid, outside. Leave it to someone like Kristi Noem to make me want to be better towards V. Kristi, puppy killer!!!

Well, that third thing I was doing this morning was “Turning Japanese…” That’s not cool. I’m sure the critic will say that—if THEY say anything worthwhile. Everything stops when it comes to “Pretty Woman.” And now I’m listening to music, avoiding moaning. Women, mine…

Lunalesca, I’ve been trying to avoid turning on the air conditioner. But yesterday afternoon… SIGH

I tell myself I was trying to take care of Virgil. But I could be trying to adapt to my ‘eternal home.’ First for betraying my boys, then thinking I betrayed my Old Man. Ha!

I was terrified when he called me yesterday about one of my bills. Only an hour later, he called back, saying it was all his fault. During that time, I was unable to move. Frozen.

But the ironic thing is that I wake up wishing I was cooling in the ground every day. I deserve it. Only I would never see Braxton again. And who would look after Virgil, Luna?

Yet I don’t know how the UNDERWORLD works. Then again, Succubus Lord, Backyard Dungeon, Bikini Nights. Don’t B COOL, Virgil

1189 Days Without B III, Day 630 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will