Tag: Edging

Episode 066 ~The Will Of Law~

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If you’re reading this, then I’m a paranoid loon, I swear in the era of the #MeToo; when girls want to be pretty but don’t you dare look, when you skip a porno website for Pinterest and feel a million times worse. The Will Of Law.

Wednesday, September 5, 2018

Episode 066 ~The Will Of Law~

Forgive Me Echo,
Give Me One Reason not to get arrested other than the fact that “The Day” is bad enough as is, I’m an adult, and I don’t want to see any new improvements in police vehicles… been there, done that. Somehow or another I needed to make this week worse for myself, but at least I’ll get busted at the house or the library, I couldn’t take it at work, damn this FEAR and damn Pinterest but how shall I explain this time?

Anything I say will be reminiscent of the Harmonic War, haven’t thought about that since forever and every day this week, I’ve thought about the police, perhaps my first sin is that of contemplating suicide, a knife in my neck… the prison system in America, terrifying. My second sin is giving into temptation or again the fear, so much for NO FAP, but if I were sticking to that I wouldn’t have so much anxiety and stress but oh no I have imagination, and that is not a good thing. Okay, so what did I do… *sigh* Fear The Walking Dead, I have a Pinterest board featuring the ladies of the apocalypse, and Alycia Debnam-Carey is one of my favorites.

Season 4 Episode 10 “Close Your Eyes” Alycia stars with the “little bitch” (I didn’t call her that, Skybound reactors did so there) a.k.a. Charlie, Alexa Nisenson so, I’m adding to my board and Alycia gets me in a mood, which leads to “edging” and so I see a Pinterest lookup feature, of course, it looks up Alycia and Alexa. I’m going to look up pictures, this is Pinterest we’re talking about and wham I get hit with one of those warnings that lets you know you’re honestly skeevy, haven’t I spoken about words you can’t use in particular company, and a picture is worth; who knows now just saying.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have some fakes of Alycia but this warning freaked me out and despite any picture, no women, no nothing, origami paper shapes I meant to send to “Cherry” since she likes them this warning kept popping up. Now was it a fluke, I’ve had some tech issues lately but how I would want to quit having nightmares of the Catholic Church or Chris Hansen, because of a full grown woman of legal age and a young actress that starred with her seriously.

Alycia Debnam-Carey And Alexa Nisenson

I’ve got about an hour, maybe less if my fear does not take me, my mother has stoked the fires talking about police cars in my neck of the woods, paranoia or the end, I haven’t felt this way since first seeing “Little Lupe” (porn star). Will you forgive me Inspector Echo, for the prospect of death that has both frightened and comforted me these past days; for not sticking to NO FAP; how about for admiring Alycia and wanting to know Charlie’s real name.

Little Lupe And Why I Lost

Last but not least, for rushing back to the house, yes my mother got to me with her report of cops in the area, I even drove by work, checked my emails and my Facebook friends, and a local neighborhood report, I must be crazy but The Will of Law.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 059 ~Iron Today, Will Tomorrow~

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My head is made of stone today, and I wish I were a Tin Man because my flesh is killing me, after all, it is stronger than steel as was said in “Conan The Barbarian,” but everything feels so damn hard at the moment. “Iron Today, Will Tomorrow” *sigh*

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Episode 059 ~Iron Today, Will Tomorrow~

Forgive Me Echo,
Give Me One Reason to stop, other than the fact that it’s “set in stone,” but that’s the Internet for you, and wasn’t I lucky that it was in its infancy when I was in high school; yeah my age is both a crime and punishment. Talk about throwing dirt on my name, but will they remember me someday, what for I ask, well Inspector Echo, this covers a wide arrange of sins, probably more suited for Dirty Diana so I will tone it down today, hopefully.

I am not the man of steel, goes without saying, especially over the last few minutes… what I mean is I’m not the hero, I’m not exactly the villain either, or at least I hope not, but I’m not “made of stone.” Iron Will, an elemental metal, yes I spent most of my workday imagining different metals and stones; when you’re introducing yourself, well Will a.k.a. Iron Will, a.k.a. I Go Hard, and there we go back into that “adult situations” state of mind. Sex and violence, you see my writing takes care of my violent tendencies, for the most part, and the sex somewhat but I also want to own a brothel someday too.

Silence is golden, am I right but is that a sin, admitting a life goal, I want a lot in this world, and I want to say I’m going to earn it but I didn’t go to the library today to write and will I be working on my novel today? All that glitters is not gold, and that can be both a good thing and a bad thing, but as I often hear in my motivations, it’s good to be a dreamer but better to be a planner and a worker and I’m dreaming a lot lately. Too bad I’m awake when I do and when I’m in bed *sigh* it’s hard but I’m on Day 15 though I’m edging like crazy for sure.

Diamonds are forever, and that is what I need to be doing, pressure and time that’s what it takes with coal but how can I when I’m on fire, and I feel like at any moment there will be nothing left of me? Will you forgive me Inspector Echo for being so random today, for the sins I know that will remain and for attempting to dig myself up from beneath the stone, for being a “basic bro,” for wanting that Midas Touch, and for not appreciating what I am for the moment because I know, Iron Today, Will Tomorrow.

“The riddle… of steel.”

“Yes! You know what it is, don’t you boy? Shall I tell you? It’s the least I can do. Steel isn’t strong, boy, flesh is stronger! Look around you. There, on the rocks; a beautiful girl.” ― Conan the Barbarian (1982)

I Will Have No Fear