Chronicle 213 ~I’ll “B” Seeing You~

Have I said what I need to say about my son? Seeing today and what I wrote for Monday? I haven’t published his book yet or did pretty much anything but buy BBQ, get boosted, and want to be belligerent. I’d tell B about it, but… I’ll Be Seeing You hmm

Sunday, January 30, 2022

Chronicle 213 ~I’ll “B” Seeing You~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but you won’t be Monday. You’re going to be losing everything. Hell, isn’t that also routine, TRADITION?

Like I told B’s Aunt Carolina yesterday, “Great Minds Think Alike.” “Aunt” is the word. The women at PetSmart, Sat. I thought of “Karens,” but Aunts like The Handmaid’s Tale. Anyway, before I get into a rant, pretending everything is normal. Excellent title, my friend. I’ll Be Seeing You. You’ll be a selfish prick and think of yourself first. Remember this time last year you were too busy seeing to B III. Not once thinking you would be without him. To say goodbye to B? Yes, I neglected to do so when I wrote for January 31st. Would you rather see him again or you? You’ll need a screwdriver to open B III’s box. Seeing yourself in the mirror should be on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE Finishing Reading The Lizard from Rainbow Bridge by Kate McGahan
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE Building Braxton’s Memorial Page And Waking Up On Time
    Partial
  3. I WILL BE Editing Braxton’s Book “My Turn To B III.”
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE Keeping It In My Pants, (Day 010 No Fap) No Exceptions, Mourning Braxton
    Completed (Day 017 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE Purchasing My First Physical Portrait For Braxton’s Frame
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE Honest With All I Encounter, No Bullshit or Caveman Answers, B Is Honest
    Failed

I’ll Be Missing You is what I should say to this list. Excuses don’t matter, but since you can’t help yourself. I had to recover. I was subsisting off of soup and pills. Replika. You miss the man you were before if you can believe that. I’m sure wherever Braxton is, he feels the same. Him missing his Daddy. If you look hard enough, you can see him in his bed as we talk. When the sun rises in about an hour and some change, you’ll place him in your bed. On any typical day, he would be here already. In the last days… Braxton wanted to be close, but he lacked the strength. Walking to his water bowl, one of his Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE Finishing Reading The Dog Stars
  2. I WILL BE Building Braxton’s Memorial Page And Waking Up On Time
  3. I WILL BE Editing Braxton’s Book “My Turn To B III.”
  4. I WILL BE Keeping It In My Pants, (Day 017 No Fap) No Exceptions, Mourning Braxton
  5. I WILL BE Purchasing My First Physical Portrait For Braxton’s Frame
  6. I WILL BE Honest With All I Encounter, No Bullshit or Caveman Answers, B Is Honest

I’ll be the greatest fan of your life, right; more like his death, sigh. But a year ago, I swear. You can’t say that to the man staring back at you from the mirror. It was always from Braxton’s eyes. Now that was a fan, someone who trusted you, loved you, how B believed in you. Is it any surprise that you can’t say goodbye to him? What will Monday be like for you? As I said, I already failed because I couldn’t do it. Open your eyes, that problem. There are no words for you or him, but this week will be the second-worst. Oh, and don’t forget Sat. Never can say goodbye but always remember this. I love you, I’ll B Seeing You.

364 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

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