Log 055 ~Will To Be Scared~

Don’t put anything negative out into the universe, one more reason I don’t look in mirrors and while I’m trying the don’t worry part, being happy is like freaking Everest, it’s there but why bother. Will To Be Scared maybe Hip To Be Square?

Sunday, August 25, 2019

Log 055 ~Will To Be Scared~

To Will:
I AM a Millionaire right now, and hopefully, you aren’t afraid. Look who I’m talking to right? You discover fears like you uncover sex. If you were a different kind of man you’d be Ice Cube, just waking up in the morning got to thank God. How about Tony Baker with his Praise God. No, you’re not getting into religion. Hell, this morning you’re at two opposites of the spectrum. On one side there’s MILF Dos. Now on the other there’s Charlotte Hazelrink and Sylvia Van Hossen. That’s Princess Lover, Princess “Censored” 3.

There’s also some other Japanese anime too. What about Heavy Rain and losing on purpose, I’m still not counting Madison’s boobs. Only that leads to your first fears this week. The stress is going to get to you, and you’ll break. In a way, I did you a favor, I suppose. I walked into Walmart thinking I would find Raney Summer Day “The Five.” There was the possibility I would find Sister Maria/Sophia Wells “Raphael.”. If you ever imagined going on a diet, all you need to do is humiliate yourself. Won’t be going to Walmart again unless the Firstborn needs something and there’s always PetSmart. I apologize for finding many new fears. You heard that pop from a plug last night. You’ll find new terrors because I couldn’t finish editing Gulp. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 006 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” B III Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Publishing My Poetry “GULP”
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing The Fallen Genesis, Tillie Cole
    Completed
  5. I AM Bringing My Email Inbox To Zero
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Reading Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Completed
  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 006 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” B III Deserves
  3. I AM Publishing My Poetry “GULP”
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Answering “M Anime” As I Answer “Indiana Gone” And “Cherry”
  6. I AM Finishing Reading Rules Of Bennett By Ember Michaels

First time in a long time I’ve gotten through half the list. Now if you had one person to believe in you for once in your life. Your motivations will say all you need is inside you Will, of course. Look at Rowan though he did anything and everything for Rainey. Maria gave all she was, her life to Raphael and now she’s his lover and a sister to The Fallen. You’ve never met a woman like either of them, damn erotica (LANGUAGE). Now you haven’t met the man that doesn’t have to be afraid in the mirror. It’s too late for that today, and it’s only 6:40 AM. All these motivations make it sound easy. It’s why you sleep all the time. If you said I am a millionaire whenever you get an evil thought; you’d run out of air. Brainbuddy breathing exercises, of course. You need the air for running, keeping your kid’s spirits up, the silent screams.

There’s too much anger. Horny is unacceptable. Why’s it cool for Will To Be Scared?

I Will Have No Fear

News of The Fallen: Genesis BOOK REVIEW

If you send angels to Hell, you get demons, though six of these orphans were about 90% there and then we have Joseph Kelly aka Gabriel who’s as close to a saint as you’ll get in a land full of sinners and he has a message. News of The Fallen Genesis.

I read a meme the other day from “The Onion.” They are having trouble writing stories more idiotic than reality. The actual news isn’t helping either. I’ve also read the “His Dark Materials” series. Wow if someone didn’t have a beef with the catholic church or religion in general. Back in my YA novel days, so move over Mr. Pullman because Tillie Cole has come to town. The first book I read from her “Sick Fux” was a home run, and so was “The Fallen: Genesis.” Okay one tiny beef but Five Stars all the way, though I had to give it four in truth.

Tillie Cole has never been one to shy away from the taboo. Now it takes a certain kind of mind to get into this writer’s material. I have good friends, bought one a copy of Sick Fux and recommended her to one more. To this day I can’t tell you what the two of them think. When I started reading The Fallen: Genesis, I didn’t quite know what to expect. Considering I’m reading “Raphael” now should be proof enough, I enjoy her titles. You can say though they are like the news. At least you won’t cry, and you’ll want to stay lost in the story. Not as sexy as my last read from her mind you. There also seems to be a pattern in some way. Like I said taboo, broken kids, evil men, and a bloodbath with a promise of more to come. The wrong choice of words, hmm but we’ll get to that. I won’t even give you the stop me if you’ve heard this part babble.

We have a good boy, a bad boy that’s his brother and five more would-be killers. Compared to the men that hold them, these boys should be saints. All given the names of the archangels. Can’t say I’m a fan of the Bible, but I know Gabriel, Michael, and was never quite sure on Raphael. So with the other names as long as you know who the good guys and the bad guys are right? I’ll give you a hint; anybody with the title of Father is evil. The big-name you’ll have to remember is Joseph Kelly known as Gabriel. The story centers on him and the love of his brothers; another rescue mission type. I keep comparing this to Sick Fux I know. When you have a great idea going, you keep rolling. Not that this novel is sweet until the end and then it’s a particular idea of sweetness. Now it does come out of nowhere but who doesn’t dream of incredible wealth.

I hope I haven’t given too much away by now. If anything the book is fantastic and Tillie Cole has to be in my top five authors. The Fallen: Genesis does its best to warn you, but you will still be shocked. If you aren’t one for this type of genre, well you might have turned a blind eye to the crimes of the so-called faithful. Not saying you have to read it but I highly recommend that you do so. Only there will be blood and the idea that all parties involved in a way have the right to do as they will. Of course, you will root for one side over the other.

As I said, the story focuses on Joseph Kelly and a tidbit on his brother James. Joseph wants two things in the world, to save his brother and devote himself to God. It’s in these two quests that lead him into serious trouble. The other characters, with one mention of a page or two, are all evil. You can see Joseph heading that way himself though he lacks the inclinations. From coming to terms about his brother and then his five adopted brothers. Of course, this grants them all books. Only with the church though we have Holy Innocents and then there are The Brethren.

Joseph is cool-headed except when he sees the true nature of The Brethren. His brother James has a pure bloodlust, and those that come after are all quite mad. Joseph or I should say Gabriel has righteousness. We all should feel as such. He only doesn’t have the power until he gets his miracle. Talk about being a walking example of the law of attraction. If this tale has any saving grace within the religious overtones, it’s merely prayer. I’m sure somebody would say prayer works with what happens near the end. Gabriel takes the role of a god-fearing man wishing to walk with the sinners. Now, what route I would have chosen instead. I see where the author was heading with Raphael being first. Which makes me curious about how the other brothers will meet, dare some form of salvation. The ending of this title though’s quite manageable indeed.

The Brethren, scary I know evil religious people like that. Again Gabriel kept calm for the most part because everyone reading this book? Let’s say you will have no problem hating these men. I shouldn’t even call them men but monsters to what they do to these seven orphans. There’s also Miller that’s pretty convenient but understandable. In a way, he was dumb, but he had no idea what had happened, and once he learned well? I know we could all use a Miller in such a line of work. The few other characters there were did serve their purpose. There was one telling Gabriel where his brother might have ended up. There were those with no names that became cannon fodder and had me hungering for the war to come. What about the other blind eyes and closed mouths who would be of service? Then there is one more character I won’t give away yet if you’re still reading up to this point, thanks.

One of my favorite parts for real is the prisoners introducing their sin of choice. Now I had several good moments and as far as The Fallen? Yeah, I want to be Gabriel, but that’s because I want that type of power. With the others, I was tempted to do some research on their names. I only know now that Raphael was a Healer but reading his title he is something different. It’s also weird that Gabriel, in his sure way, adopted a system of faith. Once more, I bring up Sick Fux. Now that was Alice in Wonderland; here we have the church’s principals.

So if I liked this book so much why only the four stars? Five stars worthy no doubt and this might reveal more about me to some extent. I should have seen it coming with it being the Catholic Church and all. I also let it slide when it came to the first title I read of this author. I should also mention I like how she has these playlists for her books. A few of the songs are on my phone this second. There will also be spoilers going forward so please go and get a copy of this book. It will convince you to read the whole series.

Anyway, this is only me; I didn’t like the sexual aspect in this one. It’s a prequel, it’s an all-boys school, not that I’m backing it in Sick Fux either. I guess I try to avoid the gay genre, does that make me a terrible person? We all have some triggers; this is mine. It’s not much, some torture but it did knock a star off. Was there anything else I didn’t like, well as a reader wanting Gabriel to go war immediately. I keep saying it reminds me of her other work, but that’s not bad at all. If the worlds were somehow connected though I wouldn’t be surprised. There was so much it this offering Tillie Cole even added a glossary. These days I’m reading Raphael and trying to come up with a good defense for his actions. I’m guessing there might be a commandment change or an amendment here or there ha.

My favorite part of this book had to be living the dream. Who among us doesn’t think about being told we have more money. Then Jeff Bezos and Mark Zuckerberg combined? To have enough power to fight the Catholic Church if need be, that’s wealth. Again I imagine Gabriel’s ideology, which got strange. One evil learning from the darker. Don’t get me wrong though; I’m for The Fallen no doubt. Let’s not get started on my history when it comes to organized faith. I’ll say that Gabriel makes it “fun” again. Even the idea he’ll let his brothers do as they please with restrictions of course. The Fallen: had me guessing from the start and left me wondering at the end. What about the space in the middle; a straight shot, the pages fly-by, and all you ask for is more? Still, none of us was in Purgatory hmm? I’m sure The Fallen indeed felt a certain kind of way.

For all the sadness and righteous anger, I feel, I know I like this book and this author. Tillie Cole is one of the few that will go to this level of taboo. If I’m lucky, my writing will get anywhere close to this level someday. If you’re not super religious or a catholic, the ideas shouldn’t bother you. Not quite an erotica, I read it for an erotica group but more like an invitation to it maybe. Or I suppose you could watch the developments about the church daily, News of The Fallen Genesis.

Natural Born Sick Fux II

All the best people are going to read this book, would I like to meet any of them other than the author, uh yeah that thought sort of terrifies me but this book turns me on. Natural Born Sick Fux II, not a sequel but look out “Natural Born Killers”.

“Have I gone mad?”

“I’m afraid so. You’re entirely bonkers. But I’ll tell you a secret. All the best people are.” Alice in Wonderland (2010)

I never got the fairy tales read to me in bed or if I did the bad outweighs the good and I just can’t remember, honestly I don’t even think I want to. This book though “Sick Fux” by Tillie Cole is something I will never forget, it haunts me.

Now this isn’t a squeal to anything but take “Natural Born Killers” plus “Alice In Wonderland” and seriously you have a worthy successor to either, though I wouldn’t let your kids see the latter and then move on to this. I’ve seen porn that has been cleaner honestly but the fact that I keep seeing this, picturing it, maybe I’m no different from Heathen and Ellis, oh and do I hear sirens? How about the author, the first book I have ever read from her and I can’t help but wonder what brought this on, I’d buy her a cup of tea, Earl Grey, for god sake’s Earl Grey nothing else will ever do, wow.

Five stars easy but how can I glow so much over this book as sick and as twisted as it is, I don’t mind tweeting quotes but there were so many I have to keep to myself here. It’s dark, terribly dark and when you do see the light, it’s the fires of Hell, not brimstone but gunfire, and however, do you wipe away the stains of blood? Okay to make a long story short, again refer to “Natural Born Killers” and give them a righteous cause and no “fux” to give except for each other Heathen and Ellis becoming Rabbit and Dolly, nothing more.

I don’t know if I’m more jealous of the talent or the fact I’m still looking for my Dolly, another comparison could be Bonnie and Clyde but this book, I’ve never read anything like it. Goes without saying I’ll be buying a copy for my actual shelf and I’ve already been talking it up to a good friend as well.

“The three always turned me on: blood, and death, and Dolly. And better yet . . . Killer Dolly”
― Tillie Cole, Sick Fux (2017)

Maybe the fact that this book turned me on so much should probably be a bad sign, things a girl could do to get me, my dog likes her, sing to me, or be anything like Dolly in this book, allowing me to be Rabbit.

Heathen James/White Rabbit, we both wear black, I’ve got at least five clocks, we both imagine a lot of people dead, both been dominated by men (not like that for me thank god), and both filled with darkness. I should also mention there is a bit BDSM master in him; should I call him a hero, given what he did for Dolly, sure and I actually believe everybody he kills people wise had it coming. They say that hate is taught and with Rabbit, the man became a Ph.D. but the question becomes could he have done better by Dolly.

To me personally once you get past their childhoods then the blood and the death doesn’t seem to be enough, trust me just let them grow up and you’ll be cheering this Wonderland duo. What about the sex though… well how sick are you, there are plenty of scenes from evil, to rough, to sensual?

Do I even have to say it… I have fallen in love Ellis Earnshaw/Dolly give me a girl like her and I’m good and no I don’t mean like one of her uncles. Honestly, Rabbit did the best he could because there is no way therapy could fix her, and I’m sure there are advocates that would say otherwise but those same people scream for punishments of the perpetrators and with what was done to Dolly… Even she acknowledged a part of herself being born and dying and there was no other choice, just saying.

As far as other characters, besides hating Rabbit’s parents and Dolly’s father, the only other character that concerned me was The Mad Hatter who plays everyday man you saw this now tell me that Rabbit and Dolly are so wrong.

This book has my five stars and even more of my money and should have yours too but if you don’t want any spoilers you should stop here. Maybe I should start saving the best for last but was there anything wrong with this title, that five stars can’t fix.

I can’t pick my favorite sex scene, but the mutual masturbation scene when they watched each other and spoke the epitaphs that they once heard, I’ve never met a girl that would let me talk like that. How about the deaths, so much death and I found myself hoping that Chapel or Henry/Hyde was sort of a Jigsaw figurehead which they sort of were for Rabbit. Now here’s something quite new, so I’m at work listening to Spotify and I looked up the “Sick Fux”, and “Dolly’s Mixtape” playlists… go download these now, incredible, spectacular.

Now Rabbit I think was pretty lucky to meet Chapel and Henry/Hyde despite the circumstances, two killers and protection so he could learn how to take revenge and help his Dolly, just seems convenient. I also didn’t like Dolly’s continued ignorance, not her fault but after everything how about learning to read, from a psychological standpoint she’s genius and living in Wonderland is good but reading I think might have been another tool for Rabbit to control her. Also, the simplest answer is usually correct but I guess I was expecting more near the end not that it isn’t surprising.

Surprise that I love this book, that I love Dolly, that I feel like I know Rabbit, that I’ll have to look into more playlists in the future and maybe keep my eye on Tillie Cole’s works. What else is there to say, Natural Born Killers, Alice In Wonderland, Sucker Punch, in a blender and you get a masterpiece that is Sick Fux, but you’ll never look at Alice the same again, I guarantee that.