Log 091 ~Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost~

Almost doesn’t count, what about school, the things I didn’t want to learn I barely got by; if I so much as said “hi” that was a threat the way some tell it, so I had to stick to shadows which made it worse still. “Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost”

Monday, September 30, 2019

Log 091 ~Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost~

Hundred And Fourth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and also a time traveler. Yes, here we go again trying to stay ahead of the game. You know I say that, but I haven’t played Heavy Rain in about a month. Now you think I would be curious about how it ends; as if I don’t know. First off I don’t get interested, I get paranoid. Secondly my curiosity. Maybe any sign of interest is usually mistaken for something more sinister. Take, for example, my new page looking for models. A woman signs up she’s interested and then not, file deleted.

How about that time I got a hacking notice while hard tagging shoes? Hell, I was panicking calling the phone company about nothing. I mentioned modeling, and you’ve seen what a pretty girl does to me Madam Justice. I am proud to say that half of what I’ve written down today is pretty positive. The rest is from YouTube to TeenStarlet, and Xvideos. On top of my social anxiety and bipolar disorder, I could add ADHD. What, so I’m a doctor now; yeah I checked out WebMD? Now I could be too plugged into everything. I’m bound to get into trouble someday. I focus on three things Writing, Women, and Warfare, in nearly everything. Of course, you’ve seen my writing is going nowhere, and I don’t like hurting people. Well, outside of the bedroom, sadist and all so yes women.

I’m a massive fan of horror movies. In Log 90, I talked about zombies which are my favorites. Next would be the Saw franchise; I would be so dead. Any way you look at Freddy, Jason, Michael Myers, they don’t scare me. It’s never the scars, masks, or the weapons but what lies underneath. I look at my son, and he doesn’t hide a thing on his face. It’s when you keep digging, knowing he’s sick. Wanting to know anything is the worse type of torture and when you make the discovery? It’s why I should stick to porn hmm because I know plenty of pretty girls. The thing is contrary to my blog and every aspect of life I don’t want to hide. Doesn’t that make me a killer though because when you’re curious you’re alive? Hell, I should put that on my resume; a gravedigger, yep creepy right?

Digging holes but never filling, Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 094 ~Whole Lot Of World~

It all started with a hole in my shoe today but I can get new shoes, it’s words that are awfully expensive, just ask whoever makes gravestones; am I incapable of being positive? “Whole Lot Of World”, these days and I’m only seeing the ugly.

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Lesson 094 ~Whole Lot Of World~

Hey Lady Lu
No Fear, there is a whole lot of world, after all, that’s me being positive just so you know because I was thinking the lesson would be Hole In The World and that’s true as well. You know I figured I had discovered the meaning of life before, have I shared that with you… anyway since this is only a working idea for the moment, I think maybe the ‘purpose’ is to fill the holes, and there are just so many Luna.

In our own way we are all gravediggers and maybe to avoid that fate we seek lives worth remembrance, and in that we become immortal. Take myself as an example, I want to be a writer, can’t say I will ever be a good one but I want people to see my words, possibly hear them, I want them to feel those little gaps in our brain, hell I told somebody once, if there is such a thing as reincarnation, I would like to be a virus. Also, I can’t say I don’t find let’s say a “Hostel” concept to be somewhat intriguing my lady.

Today my eyes were sort of wonky and you know I had one of those weird thoughts I do, this time it was about going blind because I ate a pickle but that being said I figured if I ever did go blind just kill me. With my luck, some blind person will be offended but I thought of all the holes we have and how we are in a constant need to feel them, mouths with words, eyes with beauty, ears with voices. All of this can be done by one person, a hole in the heart perhaps, you start with one at a time isn’t that right, one person trying to get to the bottom of you perhaps.

I’m still trying to do that myself, how many times have I thought of myself as one of “The Walking Dead” and I just need to be exhumed sort of like “Warm Bodies”. There is some good news, I noticed I survived the days of Sapphire though I still feel ‘anxiety” when I hear something outside, today it was the garbage truck, not the police.

So what have I learned today, other than I should listen to something other than my own insecurities, that I should see something beautiful, other than hentai, as always I’m full of crap but there’s a Whole Lot Of World?

I Will Have No Fear

Rut On Earth

Every day is exactly the same as the song goes but that isn’t always a bad thing, especially when you’re living with anxiety, you know just how much energy you’re going to need, you can put one foot in front of the other “Rut On Earth”

The sun can only dig so far
while the other stars play big wigs
Having so many promises to renege
upon they say what they are,
job creators, they are those kings, czars
giving me this full-time gig
asking me why I never studied trig.
How bizarre

that it doesn’t hurt
I suppose Atlas is used to the abuse
Walking, running, these combat boots
Don’t run in the grass, or play in the dirt
and if you see a pretty girl in a skirt
pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes
though the point is probably moot
Nowadays it’s a concert,

left, right, repeat, but what
if there was a way not to be a slave
to the rhythm to live brave,
nut up or shut up
Only the ground has become a slut
for punishment and how depraved
is it for me to dig my own grave
one day and a time, a rut?

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.