Lesson 333 ~The Stench Of Defeat~

Can you smell what the Will is cooking, despite one good endorsement everything else around here stinks to high Heaven, or maybe that’s me, working too hard or scared of looking like I’m hardly working? “The Stench Of Defeat”

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Lesson 333 ~The Stench Of Defeat~

Forgive Me Echo,
Can You Love Me Again, even when I can’t smell what The Rock is cooking, maybe when all there is to breathe is more shrimp or microwave dinners. I’ve never thought to turn the oven on since being here. How about the stress sweat but I’m too lazy to go looking for the commercial, I should probably go and take a shower if I wasn’t nearly drowning already with so many waves.

What about so many smells; it took me forever to get out of the scent of gummy bears I ripped into after work; my cooking range is limited enough, but today, I’ve only had barbecue chips and candy. Speaking of limited time, how about all that time spent tagging clothes at work today, when everybody looks at you as a failure, when you try to help a coworker, and you overstay your welcome, not to mention good ole S.A.D. It doesn’t help matters any that as hot as it is, I’m wearing my security blanket, my hoody for most of the day, you know right?

Cleanliness is next to godliness they say, but I’m just a man, and if anything, men do stupid things, I got a bit into “Manscaping” all because of women, and at this rate, it doesn’t matter, to be honest. Hell Inspector Echo how long did I go without a shower during all my days of writing oh yeah and spoiling myself watching a walkthrough of “Detroit: Become Human,” I’m addicted, but that’s only making me work harder on my writing isn’t it? Yes, that’s what I’m doing, I’m spoiling because if you’re not living you’re dying and either way it goes all I want to do is cover myself in something dirty and some green.

Preferably I would instead go with cremation but when it comes to dirt, the muck and the mire, something that straight up stinks, it’s the ideas that come into my mind, and that’s not stopping anytime soon. What about the elephant in the room, I’m the shit, or I should believe that because this is the only way anything is going to get done; with as messy as I am now all I want to do is sleep in my cool “clean” bed just saying.

I’m sorry Inspector Echo, will you forgive me for stinking up the joint, for being too hot under the collar and in my pants, for neglecting myself in this and for the dirty mind that keeps me sane, ooh that smell The Stench Of Defeat.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 288 ~Getting Our Hands Dirty~

With these two hands I will make me a world, but God took seven days, I think a month will do for me and how many authors did “The Bible” have again, though tonight I’m going to watch other people make a mess. Getting Your Hands Dirty.

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Lesson 288 ~Getting Our Hands Dirty~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today, and neither is the dog on account of the rain, missing his outside time amongst other things, but the perfect excuse to stay inside and get your hands dirty don’t you think? You’ve been doing so for days, and certain aspects of your life have been suffering for it, but you’re halfway there; when did everything become about your novel but how about these six impossible things here:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 029 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 036 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Failed (*Starship Troopers Voice* Bugs)
3. I Will Announce My Book Camp NaNoWriMo
Partial Completion (No Title or Back Cover)
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
5. I Will Write A Review
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping Or Movies

To think once upon a time, you didn’t have to be told to go outside and play, when the girl next door was enough, and you were running away from kisses, or when you would write your poetry with your feet in the lake, ah the embrace of nature. Getting your hands dirty nowadays means what germy mess is on your phone and shall we dive into your files and see all your secrets; there’s no need since you are writing them out every single day in your novel. At least you’re not hugging the toilet throwing up the real trash you are making your body with so much unneeded medication, but what are the six impossible tasks this week:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 36 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Find Out What My Book Is About
4. I Will Complete 50% of VLAD
5. I Will Post A Review
6. I Will Write My Book

It takes blood, sweat, and tears, so maybe your hands aren’t meant to be clean because now is not the time for crying, as tired as you may be, as frustrated, what about anger, I swear the rage continues. People say there is supposed to be some amount of clarity or a burst of energy you know when you stop “Fapping” but when will that kick in or maybe it explains everything that’s going on in your story. I don’t have any words of encouragement, the last thing you need is anything of comfort, might make you fall asleep on the spot, if anything the madness and the hunger endures but today is going to be a good day, Survival Sunday at the movies right?

You’ve never been one for the glass is half full or half empty, no there’s only the glass and the drink, and it’s time to take your medicine, or maybe just figure out what the hell you’re drinking nowadays. In the end isn’t that what matters, but okay we know your heart, your soul, and mind are just one big insane asylum but you’re trying to fix that aren’t you and what about doctors, clean hands but making money you know Getting Your Hands Dirty.

I Will Have No Fear

Vial Rage

Is it always fair to rage, I see fire and yet the heat it gives off threatens to burn me from the inside and whatever could douse it, sweat, blood, tears, ink, cannot extinguish such feelings. “Vial Rage”, I think I shall not rage

And I would call it a plague
how this fever infects
me, I sweat

summoning up the blood
which can never assuage
the disgust, the dirt, my name is mud.

Better though, tears for fears,
than this need to purge, to clear.
I lock the monster in its cage

the white walls of the page.
A mad world of ink,
kink, mystique, doublethink

Don’t rage, rage

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.