Tag: Sins

Log 259 ~Words Chosen Carefully Are Best~

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Well, perhaps my greatest weapon is silence. People think I’m STUPID when most days it’s how not to go to jail and then I come here and what do I say, here you go officer Exhibit A and lying? “Words Chosen Carefully Are Best”

Monday, March 16, 2020

Log 259 ~Words Chosen Carefully Are Best~

Hundred And Twenty-Eighth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but rich people trust everyone else to be STUPID. My apologies for using that word again and for thinking it ever. The truth though Madam Justice, well what is right or fact. I want to talk about my words, but then the question is, who am I?

How I like to think I pick my words for a purpose, but over the past few days, it has only been a jumble. For some time now, I look at my words like I’ll be played out to Exit Music (For A Film), my “dang” fingers and dirty mind.

Let’s start there with my trying not to swear. Don’t get me wrong; there will be a time and place for it, Madam Justice. I’ve heard people talk about foul language as a sign of high intelligence. I still find it crass and tacky unless in the right context or you’re a hot Irish girl, thank you, Katie O’Shaughnessy. Speaking of women, I see myself talking one of three ways, one as “Beggin.” The second is logical; I got money, and what do I spend that money on, WOMEN. Third, a man should be a man. I’m a Dominant for God’s sake. Only how many times have I got in trouble for being direct, forward, aggressive, dangerous? The internet seems to think so too, can I look up anything that can’t find it’s way into sex? Today (Saturday Morning), I had to write down exactly what I was doing to keep focus. I would say I should make a grocery list, but yeah, the store.

What’s the word they’re using now, um Pandemic. I talk about it being the Plague Era, and I’m not afraid. Well, I’m still joking, but I haven’t ever seen Walmart like that. I continue to use the word “excited” because I am, I built worlds off of an apocalypse. Someone could discover Audible from my stories someday, I wonder. Don’t get me wrong; I still like Audible, but it’s hard sometimes because I get so caught up in the story. Yeah, it’s pretty strange, huh I can’t keep it in my pants, I’m still hearing Rainey moaning away “Daddy.” Last is my son, who can say what he wants and knows I’ll always listen close. Three words, I Love You otherwise I’d never know them. What else can I say? Words Chosen Carefully Are Best.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 255 ~Will Trips In Eden~

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Having played Detroit: Become Human once upon a time, if the Eden Club becomes a real place, then society is doomed. So it was with the first Eden right, and there are plenty of sins available. “Will Trips In Eden.”

Thursday, March 12, 2020

Log 255 ~Will Trips In Eden~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so that means I own several brothels. If I weren’t listening to Pam Godwin’s novel Dark Notes, I would be listening to Dennis Hof. Third time’s the charm, and I’m still looking for my first Threesome. Anyway, today let us look at four alternative Bordellos.

Books, of course, is where my story begins. I keep telling myself, write a bestseller, make a million bucks. I haven’t looked at my novella in over a week, though. To think Bridgman was in the middle of getting a tit job from the lovely, well, you know who. It’s not like I can send that bit of prose out. What about GULP, though. Hell today (Tuesday), I was getting reacquainted with Cherry. Not blaming her, I wouldn’t be writing or editing anyway. Again I’ve read The Gargoyle and was imagining a few different tits, Marianne, Rainey, Cherry, Ivory. Does my “Father” have a point that I read too much?

Babes, or to be more specific, TTB. I am trying not to sound like Matthew McConaughey from Dazed and Confused. Starting a modeling agency though, well once I’m well established. One here and one European. If you ever wanted me to study the metric system, this is the way. I still remember when I found the “treasure trove” on Motherless. I was so scared when I discovered Little Lupe, Dolly Little, Dakota Skye, the Monroe sisters. Cue the Homer Drool.

Bollocks ha, speaking of the Metric System, do you remember my Red Dawn Fantasy. Two girls, redheads, The Purge, fight to the death, my Necro Leanings. Yeah, I’m still talking to Alice Little, but Ruby Rae bowed out SIGH. Anyway, there has been a resurgence around a forgotten fetish “Love/Sex Dolls.” The Bedroom Soapbox was all about Real Dolls, and now I’ve seen Piper Dolls, Earth Erotic, the list continues.

Why not go all out, Sex Robots, Detroit: Become Human with the Eden Club, a North and Kara threesome. I should also stop watching Nier: Automata. Damn you, Studio Fow, for “First Assembly” so awesome.

Banking on making my mark on the world, so I stop adding to my “Spank Bank.” Dirty Diana, I have been all over the place. From DollyDicker to Subscribe Star Adult, and did I mention speaking to Alice a little.

Dirty Diana, I’ll keep walking, always trying to make bucks until Will Trips In Eden.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 252 ~Heart Hurts More Than Body~

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My Ma would tell me to go easy with all the seasoning salt. I’ve got quite a long history with women, plus I have my furry kid, I haven’t had a heart attack yet, but I know all about broken hearts. Heart Hurts More Than Body.

Monday, March 9, 2020

Log 252 ~Heart Hurts More Than Body~

Hundred And Twenty-Seventh Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, if only because I refuse to see a doctor. Not because I’m afraid. Indeed in this time of plague with the Coronavirus (COVID-19), I’m excited. Now I know that doesn’t sound right, and it shouldn’t, not until there are zombies. Okay, I’ll stop, I know I’m not funny. I’ve never laughed so much until it hurts. Madam Justice, I’m not one for self-harm. Fists at drywall, STUPID things while people watch. Giving into FAPPING (it’s Saturday). Anyway, my body takes a lot, but what about my heart?

Most recently, what I said about Cherry and I don’t mean my novella. I speak my heart to you and the others Madam Justice. No secrets, but you and I both know that’s a lie. If I told you everything, then we would see the end, and that’s how you know I’m not suicidal. Still, it happens the same way; I try to talk to one girl, I speak innocence to another, I don’t tell one more and wham. I’m having a “Harriet the Spy” moment because it’s like they weren’t supposed to see that. I put my heart out here so the body can keep going. The thing is nobody wants my heart. I think that’s why I’ve been down as of late. If I don’t write out how I am, the body keeps it in, and I “mess” up, horny, hatred, heartfelt, whatever.

Women though SIGH, let’s talk about something else that hurts my heart, My Dæmon. My little boy is getting older; he’s bumping into walls, avoiding his walks on cold days, sleeping more. Then again, I’m in bed, and he only wants to be near his Dad. I’m still not working on my stories, and I miss them—what a waste of the day. Somebody took my shift at the Day Job and how did I spend it, Madam Justice, lying here looking at the usual. Even my FEAR of my father doesn’t have me doing anything. Okay, so hurting my friends or them getting hurt, Indiana Gone told me she got punched in the face. My little boy and my writing, what more do I love in this world. The man in the mirror that is such a waste that it hurts to witness myself.

Only the body doesn’t quit, fingers, eyes, ears, dang humming, Heart Hurts More Than Body.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 248 ~And Will’s Sentence Is~

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I’m not a BETA, better yet I’m not a BETA READER, but for someone who knows disdain for most of my words, there are plenty of people saying, “Hey Listen” like their Navi and I’m Link. “And Will’s Sentence Is,” well, it’s usually smut, but it’s honest

Thursday, March 5, 2020

Log 248 ~And Will’s Sentence Is~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and it starts with writing. Yes, I still intend to make my money much like Dennis Hof. Yet, I want to write a bestseller, and how is that getting along nowadays? I’ve learned that besides great sex, some men only want to be heard. Now that goes for everyone. We want a voice. I ask a lot of women Dirty Diana, sometimes too much, I understand. Words, though, are all I have, and yes, sometimes I take them for granted. I say bad things? Only to be ignored Dirty Diana, silence is a fierce weapon.

Okay, so none of this sounds sexy. Dammit, I’m not playing the ALPHA MALE right now. I won’t be a BETA, though, more to the point a BETA READER. That’s the crux of what’s bothering me these days. I’ve said before I like making women feel good, and do you know why. When women are pleased, so am I. The thing is I’m pleasing women and what am I getting out of it, Dirty Diana. Read my story, she says, praise my poem, tell me I’m pretty and what about me, hmm? My prose, you don’t have to read it, publish your poetry not that I care, be the pervert so I can laugh. I’m a sadist, I enjoy punishments but fuck how I will praise. I refuse to serve out a sentence where that’s all I do, so some girl can tell me where some guy can put his penis. I am so done.

I know that road, Dirty Diana. There was a time I wrote for “gentlemen,” and next thing you know, some girl is losing her panties. The same thing said with my face is a fucking jail sentence. Like I said pervert, and in some cases, yes, I’m skeevy. Even now, I don’t want to sound mean, but why not. It beats begging, didn’t I say that before I’m whining. Dirty Diana, I have no qualms about paying a woman for her body. To possess her mind, though, to know yeah, I’m a dick, but I want to please. Well, rage, rage, dying of the light, and all that which I failed today because I’m so stressed out. The truest sentence, I know, “No, I’m not your Beta-reader, what about me?”

My silence, smut, some shame, what. And Will’s Sentence Is

I Will Have No Fear

Log 245 ~Pretending Is Optional, Not Requisite~

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One more story so I can pretend to be a writer, I can say I have more time, but if I don’t do anything with it, and I’m starting back listening to my motivations as if I believe I will be inspired. Pretending Is Optional, Not Requisite

Monday, March 2, 2020

Log 245 ~Pretending Is Optional, Not Requisite~

Hundred And Twenty-Sixth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, or so I pretend as such. You know Madam Justice, I’ve never been a fan of that saying, “Fake it ‘til you make it.” Well, my motivations say otherwise. The law of attraction, positive affirmations, my current novella. At the moment, I’m unsure because sitting right here on this loveseat; I don’t have to pretend. The “dang” HUMMING is driving me crazy. In the shower this morning, I was breaking down, if you know what I mean. Going out into the world, I was scared to death.

As the song goes, “If I could be like that.” Again I think of my hero Dennis Hof. He was a Pimp, parent of a dog, and he penned a book. Two out of three right, Madam Justice? Sometimes I walk around like I’m a pimp, but as I’ve been saying a lot these days, things are falling apart. What about my story, am I giving up already? Last night I wanted to, no question. I’m three parts in, and I don’t know where I’m going. In chapter four, Minister Bridgeman is, of course, starting to give away his “holy man” ways duh. What about being a rich man at all? How much money did I send today, gorging myself? Didn’t I have a conversation about not spending money on a new Kindle and an HP Printer? Relax, I didn’t because even pretending to be reasonable is something else entirely.

I pretend to be, well, I’m not even a comedian anymore, I’m only the punchline. What’s sickening though is at the Day Job, I’m upset that I didn’t go in today. It’s (Saturday, February 29) LEAP DAY, which of course, I spaced on. Am I pretending to be a writer, Madam Justice? Getting back into my motivations, one says you’re either a writer or not. I’m not pretending to be a writer, but instead that anything I put down makes perfect sense. I’m living in the moment, and I don’t know what any of this means. My pretending is becoming real but only the worse things. If I may quote another song, “Why do the things I hate come so naturally.” One more reason I sleep all the time. But isn’t that, well “pretend that we’re dead.” I’m not suicidal.

When will I stop pretending Madam Justice, better yet how? Pretending Is Optional, Not Requisite.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 241 ~Call Him Iron Will~

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I’m no blacksmith, do they even call it that anymore, the only metals I’m concerned with these days besides My Dæmon’s collar ring is the nickels and dimes I have and what do I usually spend those on, it’s hard not to. “Call Him Iron Will.”

Thursday, February 27, 2020

Log 241 ~Call Him Iron Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and do you know why? Bucks, Broads, Bullets, and dare I say Biology. I am not my “Father” I don’t beat women or small furry kids. Okay, yes, I hit my sister, it’s called having a sibling. My Dæmon did see the business end of a rolled-up newspaper, but I never kicked him at the door. Okay, before I sound any more like the dude from “The Room,” this leaves Bucks and Broads. I’ve never seen people harder than when they’re defending their money and the desire for more. Men are supposed to be hard for any number of reasons. You know me, though; I’m usually talking about my penis.

It’s Day Two of NO FAP; of course, the goal is seven days like I’m a damn drug addict. If I didn’t mention it before, Sunday night, it was Anna Vlasova, aka Alissa Angel. There was also the woman in the red dress; no, not that one. At least she knows a guy FAPS to her, which isn’t a compliment? I’m trying Dirty Diana, hell I’m listening to The Gargoyle and that’s told from a narrator that has no dick. I’m even going to reread it, so ask me why I’m looking up Audible books from the Erotica genre. Why am I going to cut our conversation short tonight so I can work on a snippet of Apocalypse Rush? If I’m not “holding on” to my “Iron Will,” I need something else, anything else. I hate being gross, hell, if I wanted an excuse to keep my head up, it’s feet. Now that is a fetish, and I’ll never understand, not judging. Fuck Me Pumps, Boots, Frilly Socks, yes please but bare feet Hell No.

No, I didn’t forget about black pantyhose and thigh high stockings now that’s a dangerous road. Okay, speaking of which, I haven’t been playing any games (DAMN DEN HUMMING). I’ve been watching play-throughs. You remember Detroit: Become Human and the Eden Club. Sexbots, sexbots, do you want me to break out Tom Jones’s “Sex Bomb.” Anyway, the Internet being what it is talked about sex dolls and talk about something hard to get around. Real Dolls and Piper Dolls. One more thing to add to my empire when I buy my first brothel, an idea.

Like calling myself Willie Long Stroke; Call Him Iron Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 238 ~It Scares You, Do It~

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Is the BBQ that good, am I so concerned about a few extra cents in my bank account, and why I’m not afraid of the dark, I still hate driving at night, but then you ask how do I go out on dates. I’m the Beast, so where’s Beauty. “It Scares You Do It.”

Monday, February 24, 2020

Log 238 ~It Scares You, Do It~

Hundred And Twenty-Fifth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that makes life a whole lot easier. Now I won’t lie to you Madam Justice, my “obsession” with money is a cover for FEAR. You know I’m always one to trade one vice for another. I choose LUST over WRATH. Let me have GREED over SLOTH. Last night I took to GLUTTONY over ENVY. Okay, so what about PRIDE. Madam Justice this leads me to today’s lesson, what am I afraid of; well everything but we don’t have that kind of time. While I was out though last night, I did have thoughts of “Rainbow Girl.”

You remember her, The Rainbow Girl. How I twice asked her out (online) to dinner and a movie. So there I was last night it’s been a full year since she blocked me, of course. Anyway, I’m picking up BBQ in the dead of night, and I can hardly breathe. What about Indiana Gone’s Wedding. I won’t say I love the girl, and in truth, I was angry. Madam Justice, I was mad I had to drive 750+ Miles to her wedding, facing highways, the FEAR of my Olds, and losing money. For some reason, though, I thought I was going to meet a girl. Let me tell you a story about Cherry. I work my Day Job; I have so many novels, poetry, a whole blog. Only I’m writing poetry and short stories for her Madam Justice. I’m reading her work because that’s what she wants. Oh, and how I listen to her about her greatest love of all.

Noticing a pattern, well, maybe not, but I was hungry last night, and I chose to eat well rather than grab a burger. I would go all out for a woman. An opportunity would temper my anger. I work harder rather than stay in bed, and yes, Madam Justice, I made my bed today. Women make me brave, but why not show any PRIDE? I cannot contain my FEAR, and I do not FEAR any woman. Well, except my Mom, she’ll kick my “butt” if I don’t vote. Remember to VOTE people; we must stop Trump and his legion of sycophants and Bloomberg too. What scares me Madam Justice is myself, my desires. My “Dom-Hood,” the dangerous disease called LOVE.

It scares me to be me, so what’s the rule, It Scares You, Do It.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 234 ~Enough Will To Love~

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The lesser of two evils and no good to be shown, though to some marriage and a “vanilla” lifestyle is enough, but what is it that I want in the end, well is there even a finale to be seen ever? “Enough Will To Love”

Thursday, February 20, 2020

Log 234 ~Enough Will To Love~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and if I haven’t said it before, “two girls at the same time.” Now I wouldn’t need a billion for that and maybe not even a million, but it’s still on my to-do list. What guy doesn’t want to do two girls, minus the gay ones? Anyway, if it isn’t two girls, it’s the fact that I can’t keep my mind on any one kink or fetish. Do you remember my “Red Dawn” Fantasy? Virgin Killer Sweaters meet The Purge. Hell, even the Day Job isn’t helping, I go from American Teen Lily Carter to Fake Driving School Estella Bathory.

I work with what I have Dirty Diana, retail, and driving. If today weren’t about sex, though, I would be in bed. My bed’s not big enough and while I enjoy BBW’s no doubt. A “Skinny Minnie,” as Cherry calls them and a BBW, well, that’s a thought. In one of my novels, the Male Protagonist has his way with a mother and her daughter. If he doesn’t, I’m writing it in there because I imagined Haley Pullos. Fucking an older and younger woman, now that would be something. A mother and daughter, what about sisters? I’ve had a thing for Mia Rose forever and her sister Ava. Talk to me about twins Dirty Diana. Is there any wonder I wanted Alice Little and Ruby Rae, not twins but two redheads? You want to know what’s worrisome, the two girls fight, and the Necro concept.

Didn’t I speak a few days ago about the taboo? What do you get when you take girls like Little Lupe and the end of the world? One of my favorite anime series, that’s what. I paid $20.00 and will probably shell out more when the time comes. Now, this might sound quite common but “Public Sex,” which in turn goes back into clothes. I swear, will I ever get black pantyhose off my mind? How many times have I mentioned Fechikano these days, along with humming and violence? I say I want to hit somebody I’m wrong, I want to fuck, it’s the same thing. People want to like an inch of me, and it’s that damn inch I hate about myself. I want someone, someones to desire me, love me, in my totality, or I’m a greedy S.O.B.

I’m rough, I fuck hard but Enough Will To Love?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 231 ~Adults Hate Until They Choose~

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When you choose you don’t have time to hate but only to understand, so you start with the question, what do you want and I answer, I wish I were a better man, more to the point that I wasn’t so scared because I do hate. Adults Hate Until They Choose.

Monday, February 17, 2020

Log 231 ~Adults Hate Until They Choose~

Hundred And Twenty-Fourth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and how can anyone hate with that amount of money? In a way, it’s like a public service. The more I have, the less I have to FEAR. Tonight that’s all I know, an overwhelming fear. You know what the news is, as always I hate the humming in this house. I’m starting to hate anything that wakes me up, be it my alarm clocks, memories, and of course, my phone. I can’t even glance at it anymore without becoming ill. Most of all, I hate being AFRAID. Every moment it gets worse, and like Adult Entertainment, it’s everywhere I look now.

Adults Hate Until They Choose and as all of my Motivations point out, what do I want. Madam Justice, I made a list of goals, and I’m nowhere close to them. Indiana Gone and Cherry live somewhat in a state of innocence, I see. You know me, I have a Guilt Complex. For these past few days, I have chosen to go to sleep. If there is a decision to be made, I want to feel good if only for a while. I want to keep talking to you and the others because I have nothing else going. Sloth and Lust, but writing isn’t exactly a job and not a sin. You can place it under Pride or Greed, that I intend to make money this way. How about Wrath that I continue to take revenge for all of my misdeeds? So why not choose another way, be a man.

I choose not to live in half of a house. Only that doesn’t stop the noise now does it, Madam Justice. I’m sitting here in the Den as it drones away, and why? “Eerily,” and yes, Grammarly is going to call me out for that word. Anyway, I’m reminded of those nights when I was sick of the Basic “Witch.” Can I not choose to Live Brave and stop thinking about my STUPID phone? In less than an hour, I’ve jumped twice and for what. Spam emails, and sooner or later, I’m going to get into trouble. Again let me choose to be brave and not live in fear of every moment. Madam Justice, I’ve decided to be a man and not to hate myself.

A Man chooses, but a slave obeys. What am I? Adults Hate Until They Choose.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 227 ~Will Needs Better Material~

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A bit rushed, I know but call it desire, primal instinct, or my latest fetish for the moment; the wrong woman with the right accessory, it must be magic or a nice pair of black pantyhose. Will Needs Better Material.

Thursday, February 13, 2020

Log 227 ~Will Needs Better Material~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and this is awkward. Well, I don’t mean the money now, but it’s someone’s birthday today. My son is now fifteen (73 In Dog Years). So I want to wish him the happiest of birthdays until next year, of course. Remind me not to read about life expectancy. By this time in his life, he should have a mom and siblings. Okay, well speaking of everything I intend to do to his future mom or woman for the moment. My Dæmon hasn’t like anybody since Indiana Gone moved back home.

Now I don’t mind watching some women walk away. You also know I have a habit of keeping women in place. As I told Cherry once, as the song goes, “chains and whips excite me,” but not in a traditional sense. While I’m busy singing another song goes, “I, got a fetish for fuckin you witcha skirt on” SIGH. Grammarly is going to ding me that but anyway; clothes Dirty Diana. Yes, regular vanilla fucking works too, but you know I’m always one for the story. A love story is what I want, but tonight is more along the lines of “Fechikano! Vol.1 Hime Shuu.” For those unfamiliar, it’s about a guy named Shuu who falls for Hime and ends up fucking her, of course. He has passions when it comes to her clothing from panties to none. Knee socks, to stockings/pantyhose, so well rounded.

I’m a breast man on any given day. When’s the last day I’ve gone without looking at tits? I could also go on about the subject of tying a girl up with her bra, hands behind her back. I don’t mind keeping a pair of her panties, hell I have a closet full of stuff for a submissive. Knee socks and pantyhose, hmm, not to mention I’ve had fantasies of a certain bubble butt girl. The thing is, though, when thinking of those knee socks, I’m one for some bright colors. Pantyhose they have to be black, I don’t know why they look gaudy in any other color. In both instances, I can blame witches. Talk about a witch hunt. One in particular with her black pantyhose, I want to tear a hole in, and I think you know where. I wonder how much those would cost or to fuck her. Will Needs Better Material.

I Will Have No Fear