Tag: Therapy

Gospel 025 ~Wilting Willy Or Recovery~

WillLeave a comment

I’m hoping this week, I won’t be waiting till the midnight hour. I have one more chapter to go, and then that will be 50,000 words, and that’s another Camp NaNoWriMo in the books. Still, it’s like I’m missing something. Wilting Willy Or Recovery

Sunday, July 26, 2020

Gospel 025 ~Wilting Willy Or Recovery~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and when you are, make for damn sure you buy a better bed. Also, get girls with beautiful breasts and, for God’s sake, behave yourself. Now while this conversation is brought to you by the letter B, let’s talk about BALANCE. I haven’t had much of that last week, and what the Hell were you thinking about today? You should have been done with the novel by now. Why are you still 2500 words away from the finish? Don’t you know how this week is going to be? If there is anything to be grateful for, it’s your Dæmon. The little boy has been a trooper knowing how tired you were today.

Last night I spoke to Lady Lu about having nightmares, and all I dreamed about was losing another friend. It could mean that the story is coming to an end, of course. At least you were able to decide on the finale. The truth is, you wish you knew more evil English blondes. You know plenty of nasty American blondes; Tomi Lahren, Ivanka Trump, Kayleigh McEnany. Still, the story ends with the sweetest UK blonde, you know because Cherry’s from the UK, so. Now you’re thinking you should blame NO FAP or the fact that you haven’t been eating right. Those sound like excuses to me, but I take responsibility, this is my fault. Camp NaNoWriMo was kicking my ass, so I figured a solid week of work would make it right. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 020 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 028 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

At least I got two, but hear me now, you have to finish the story Monday, no exceptions. You never will otherwise, and why do you think I’m speaking to you so early, 9:30 PM? I’m giving you an out to not stay up all night because there is no food in the house. You have to shower, wash your mask, and get some sleep before the sun is high. No looking at lots of porn either, I swear this better not be the week you break. It’s still there, you know, you don’t have to imagine Cherry’s Yabbos or any other set of Yabbos. I was going to suggest you make not watching porn a thing, but you’re not ready to become the Man of La Mancha. Only you always have Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 028 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Complete My Novel For Camp NaNoWriMo On Monday
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, by Colleen Hoover

Again Monday you finish, then ask Wilting Willy Or Recovery.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 024 ~Nights Of The Willies~

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Good night or more like good morning? Will I actually get to bed before 12 A.M. come Sunday? I have 2800 more words to go with the novel, so it has been one productive ass week. For something, I’ll never publish. “Night Of The Willies”

Saturday, July 25, 2020

Gospel 024 ~Nights Of The Willies~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but to be completely honest, I’ve about finished another story, thank you. As of my last count, I am now 2800 words away from the finish line. Only I still doubt I’ll get a decent night’s sleep tomorrow or today seeing how it’s 2:15 A.M. now.

As Ted Mosby put it “Nothing Good Happens After 2 A.M.” I believe it was Todd Chrisley that said something about 12 A.M. as well.

“Your curfew is 12, cuz ain’t nothing open after midnight except legs and the ER, and you’re gonna stay out of both of them.” –

On a personal note, Lady Lu, all I want is to get six hours of sleep and not have My Dæmon be confused some mornings.

Hell, I work these late nights to avoid the horrible days at the Day Job. So how is that working out for me, hmm? Do I owe some thanks to NO FAP though I was ready to break again? It would be something if I was having nightmares or something. The only thing I hate on these nights is finally going to bed and seeing the blue creep outside my window. I know I shouldn’t be putting that sort of negativity out into the world. Be careful what you wish for My Lady. At this point, I want more of the Simple Things, thank you, Mr. Huynh. Now, how many white men have I taken advice from in the past few minutes? Again Ted Mosby, Todd Chrisley. Oh, Mr. Huynh’s country singing voice belonged to Randy Travis from Hey Arnold.

Anyway, I would settle for a clean house for starters. I was going to say something else, but I suddenly got a touch of paranoia. Okay, so I’m writing because I hate my job and don’t want to be scared anymore. Nothing that I’ve written tonight is going to help me overcome that. Oh, and if I haven’t said enough about writing, I jumped the gun this afternoon. I tell you all the time I lie to Camp NaNoWriMo and stay up all night, making up for it. So in bed this afternoon, I accidentally marked I was finished with my novel. Don’t worry, I immediately erased the entry, but that didn’t stop them from giving me the badge. At least it will be right by today or tomorrow. Now shouldn’t I be grateful that I had this whole week to do something I love? Yeah, Lady Lu, that’s funny.

When will these long nights’ end? Nights Of The Willies.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 018 ~Your Second Chances Will~

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As the song goes *ahem,* I’m gonna wait ‘till the midnight hour. If anything, I wish I had a chance to do today all over again, which would mean waking up at 4 AM instead of just seeing my bed then. I got stories to write. “Your Second Chances Will.”

Sunday, July 19, 2020

Gospel 018 ~Your Second Chances Will~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but do I hold out much hope for you? At the Day Job, when I can remember too, of course, I live in “Day-tight Compartments.” That’s a lesson from Dale Carnegie. It means you deal with what’s right in front of you today. You’re not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, only handling today. I can see now that you don’t agree. Looking at yourself right this second, where are you? Sitting in bed, pausing YouTube with Fear The Walking Dead. Your Dæmon is being a trooper, though.

Now I covered this yesterday, I know. I went shopping for peanuts, and I mean that literally. Publix sells the Atlanta Braves Peanuts. Then there was the panic at the broken ATM. A minuscule amount of shopping at Walmart. Oh yeah, being called Ma’am picking up BBQ. As for the future, it’s like I say, “just another day.” You would rather not speak about it, and yet you have no choice, because what happens if you don’t? Like last night all the lights were blazing, and you’re falling asleep at 4 AM instead of waking up. Today there is even more stress having to talk to you, and you wonder why everyone leaves. Of course, while you can barely get it up to live, you drooled over Tifa Lockhart again. There was Abigail Breslin’s impressive Yabbos. Let’s never forget these long-overdue sadly Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 014 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 020 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

Once again, as the song goes, Back At One. The thing is you want a second chance, so do I.

Strange that I mentioned Peanuts the food, but what about the gang that sang, I Know Now. If you’re getting lost, that’s from Charlie Brown, “and have my life to live over knowing what I know now.” Second can also mean plenty of things. For example, that second is the first loser. Is that from one of my motivations? There was Mark Wahlberg, aka Elliot Moore asking for a second. Then there’s all of us who need a second, a minute, an hour, days, weeks. All you want is a chance and every week you get another one. You don’t even need to wait seven days. You can change whenever you want and stop living as a second, third-class, a Tallie. Live Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 020 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

Will you, though, your chances seem as plentiful as your excuses. Your Second Chances Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 017 ~Ma’am This Sucks Will~

WillLeave a comment

Another Late Night/Early Morning, and this should be pillow talk or rather be conked out at the moment instead. I won’t be dreaming about some girl because I wrote her into my story, but what kind of man am I? Ma’am This Sucks Will, I think

Saturday, July 18, 2020

Gospel 017 ~Ma’am This Sucks Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I had to succeed at NO FAP. Now I am sorry, Lady Lu, that everything relates to my “monster” nowadays. Didn’t somebody say once that life is worth more than a penis? I’m not counting that as a bad word. Lady Lu, whatever I’m doing with my life, I want to be more of a man than I am today. How I panicked today because somebody broke the ATM, and I couldn’t get my card back. When the people at the BBQ place called me Ma’am again. Hell, I’m still buying clothes for some future submissive I’ll have soon…

The whole damn country is falling apart, and all I can worry about is me. Yesterday, I was telling Sophia about all the lists I’m writing about my problems. I’m also itchy, I have heartburn, and as always I’m tired as all Hell thank you. I don’t even want to dare to glance at my Six Impossible Things because what have I got done? I’m keeping it in my pants, and my story is taking off. 2400 words a day, and of course, I’m not catching up because I should be doing 5000 words, but what did I do today? As I said, I freaked out at the bank, but I did get my card back. I continue to feel like I’m getting in everybody’s way wherever I am. Tonight will be one more, where I don’t get enough sleep, so what about tomorrow. I pay for wrestling, but how much can I tell you?

Things to be grateful for, so I get off this pity train. As with my gratitude, I have enough to eat for a few days. I haven’t looked at much porn today, but as soon as I say that, SIGH. You and I Lady Luna will finish this conversation, but I wish I had more to tell you. Another character is in my book, Charity Zoey Mars. She’s another English girl, so Cherry won’t be lonely. With that, I should probably say something about my country? I’m a black man living in America. Who is going to hear my voice, I ask. Do I want them to at all considering the things I have to say? Now that takes me back to my point, I’m not a man when I speak… Ma’am This Sucks Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 011 ~Only The Willing Tonight~

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What time is it, one of my motivations talks about waking up at 4 AM and I find I’m not getting to bed until 2 AM and why? I’m writing another story and still falling behind. 10,000 words so far. Only The Willing Tonight

Sunday, July 12, 2020

Gospel 011 ~Only The Willing Tonight~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means you should be waking up at 4:00 AM. I don’t recall the last time I saw bed before 2:00 AM all last week. Now I know I can’t say I have left you in a good position. Hell, you’re still down 10,000 words, and Chapter Five doesn’t even have a title yet. The story is coming together, though, and I’m proud of you for being somewhat productive. You’ve added 2,100 words, a hundred less than yesterday, but what NaNoWriMo asked of you. Well, you know what your motivations say about the bare minimum. It’s not 120%.

Why is tonight all about the numbers? Snowpiercer went from 1,001 cars long to 994. It was also the season finale, so that’s one more reason you’re up so late. Oh yeah, Rowan Blanchard was in this episode as Alexandra Cavill, so yeah, you want to see her Yabbos. That’s one thing that’s not going to change, the quest for Yabbos. I had to stop myself from reaching out to MILF Dos or Cherry this week. There is so much work to be done, and I added two new girls to the novel. There’s Cassie Laila Dillon, played by Cindy Aurum. Also, I have Deeana Jillian Ramsay, who is Rebecca from Marvel Charm. Well, that’s your problem now, like the rest of this week. I always leave you in the worst position I know, and I’m sorry. So Yeah um there’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 007 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 014 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

Two grueling weeks, you don’t know what it’s like, but you will. Do yourself a favor, though, and don’t go offering MILF Dos or Cherry $500. Nothing good happens after 2 AM a dumbass once said (cough) Ted Mosby. Yeah, I shouldn’t be coughing either; The Coronavirus (COVID-19) getting worse all around. The one thing you’re not worried about when it comes to this life. For someone’s life is one reason the lawn got cut because I was trying to help that someone out. A lie, of course, I was too lazy to do it. Every night when I say I’m going to do better, what happens? Funny, I was thinking about that song from Creed, With Arms Wide Open. I want to tell you, I hope you’re not like me but Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 014 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Catch Up With NaNoWriMo
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

All I ask of you besides JSS, yes, that’s from The Walking Dead. Write Your Story, Only The Willing Tonight.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 010 ~Will’s In The Sky~

WillLeave a comment

The hands of the clock keep spinning, sun up and sundown. My head is in a fog because it’s after midnight. Now how many people are reading this, and how many are reading my story? “Will’s In The Sky.”

Saturday, July 11, 2020

Gospel 010 ~Will’s In The Sky~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means the sky’s the limit. Well, you know me, I could go into a load of pop culture references. I could say I’m already building the Death Star. How about something to the tune of Gattaca, how badly I want to leave this planet? Am I becoming suicidal again? Hell Lady Lu, if I could end it all is a question I ask each night, but I’m not dying. Of course, I could always talk about some girl’s Yabbos, which is why I wasn’t so successful as I wanted to be today. I could keep working through the night, but Will I Lose My Dignity.

“When you’re white, the sky’s the limit. When you’re black, the limit’s the sky.” Chris Rock Bigger & Blacker (1999)

Forgive me, Lady Luna. I’m still trying to appear more coherent. Call it a lack of sleep, my hatred of spending cash, and yeah, I’m hungry. I have a thousand dollars in the next room, and I’m upset about my $9.00 sneakers getting wet. So that brings me to accomplishments today. I did walk My Dæmon this morning. On this very evening, I meant to type 4600 words but only got around to 2200. It’s my highest word count so far this month of camp. NaNoWriMo isn’t asking for any more tonight. Lady Lu, I even did some reading too. I may finish Too Late by Colleen Hoover tomorrow. Should I say today, considering what time it is? The fact is I’m rolling. I’m doing something constructive, to say the least. Oh, how about the saddest battle now, NO FAP.

Sad to say, I’m thinking about MILF Dos, Cherry, and her Mum. It’s in the context of my story, and I’m starting Chapter Four, “Like A Moth He Came.” Yes, you know I am always one to spin a title. Even with the Coronavirus (COVID-19), I’m trying to be creative instead of worried. I went to Church’s Chicken today, and none of them were wearing masks. My “father” got tested, but my little sister was in quarantine. Stop hitting yourself, Nelson Muntz would say. How about I stop repeating myself. For example, writing stories that are never going to go anywhere. Starting NO FAP because I’m disgusted being the nice guy wanting to see Yabbos and do I. Um yeah…

Have I gotten through this conversation without heading to you know where dear Lady Lu?

Giving myself more problems other than addiction, and they’re pretty high, Will’s In The Sky.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 004 ~You Feel What’s Will~

WillLeave a comment

How are you… I swear I need to put that phrase on the list of my most hated words. Usually, when somebody asks me, I either want to say something with an “F” attached and no, I don’t mean FINE unless it comes with a pretty girl. You Feel What’s Will.

Sunday, July 5, 2020

Gospel 004 ~You Feel What’s Will~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and like my many motivations, let me give you this advice. If you can believe in such, you can have it. Sometimes I don’t know what type of “saying” is worse. Some CONFUSE. How about those that have CONTINUED since forever. No, I would have to say, it’s the ones that you CONCOCT yourself. Let’s be honest though, they all come off as confusing in the end. No one will take you for a PROPHET, a PULITZER prize winner, or a PORNOGRAPHER. The thing is, what you feel in this one moment.

So what brought this on? We’ll get to that in due time, but for now, let’s speak of the wise. Those that talk about being yourself, follow your heart, burn the boats, and other things. How about, in one ear and out the other? You’ll always be one to blame yourself first. These words, spoken by the successful invoke such feelings. Only then, at the same time, your emotions aren’t valid. Your desires are wrong, that’s what they’ll say. It’s all too much that you overwhelm them. Well, how do they expect you feel all the time? I’m repeating myself because you know that they don’t care. It’s one of the reasons, the words “How are you” ring so hollow. Why do they bother asking at all? People pay psychologists, they fund their pornographic passions, hell the police to listen. And you, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 007 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover
    Failed

One out of six, and I want to make excuses for not hearing myself. I know this week you’ll do the same thing. You need your rest, something else will pop-up, the Day Job did its thing and what hmm? You’ll cave to Kendall Kross “The Graduate.” Imagine Momokun or Chelsea “Casting Couch-HD” as Cherry? What about Arielle Ferrera, Gia Steel, Violet Myers even Jade Jantzen? I guess you can see what I’ve been doing with my morning. I had a friend talk about expanding cultural horizons a day or so ago. I’m still missing two girls, but you feel there is something you can do about it. I’ll admit talking to a pornstar. Or drooling over Tifa Lockhart, and Aerith Gainsborough isn’t helping. The point is to feel, that’s what sex does so why not these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 007 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

The money, the power, then the women, now that’s wise so You Feel What’s Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 003 ~Will To Be Free~

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What’s it like to be free? Would I say I’m free? I mean, I’m not at the “Day Job” for once. I could fall asleep if I so chose. Hell, I know what I really want to do, but I’m abstaining for some reason. “Will To Be Free,” of addiction, anxiety, aching

Saturday, July 4, 2020

Gospel 003 ~Will To Be Free~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, or so I wish. My motivations would say, don’t chase money but follow your purpose. More to the point, I face down my goals every day, and you know what those are. Yabbos… talk about freedom and independence or maybe not.

Red eyes, my attempts at blushing, and being a horny male, prevent deep thoughts. I apologize that everything keeps returning to sex. It beats RAGE, doesn’t it. As long as it’s me and My Dæmon, whatever do I have to be mad about? Now I mentioned red eyes, and they both relate to the same “problem.” One, I’m tired because I’m all about PORN, and this will be day six of NO FAP. What am I not fapping to? Well, you know how I enjoy making my lists leading nowhere:

  1. Tifa Lockhart
  2. Aerith Gainsborough
  3. Liz Vicious
  4. MILF Dos
  5. Cherry
  6. Serah Farron
  7. Ellie, Dina
  8. Sesskasays
  9. New Purchases

That’s another thing, Lady Luna, like the word Yabbos, I’m digging on the number NINE. The NINE women I did wrong, or that’s all I can remember. Well, today is all about remembrance and celebration.

White or right… a Freudian slip or an observation? Now before you get excited, you what white reminds me of. I’m all for Black Lives Matter, but I love me a white girl. Not now, but when I start seeing with my heart instead of other portions of my anatomy. Hell, last night was touch and go because of that picture that started me on the road to Tifa. I found who made it and spent $15.00 on the collection. I swear I do everything for the Yabbos. Hold on, but I’m slobbering, spitting, snarling like an animal. So reasons I PUT ON THE MASK.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-P9lJQspq8

Blue Balls, though, are hurting, so I don’t have time for the Coronavirus (COVID-19). One disease or addiction at a time. The government is giving up, but I still believe I can do better. My legs crossed in bed, phone off, fighting the urges, porn is everywhere, and hiding it would break me without question. I should also mention my depression over my story, I mean how far did I get last night? I have characters to free from my mind, but then what exactly?

Red, White, Blue, I want GREEN, Will To Be Free.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 363 ~And I Will, Tomorrow~

WillLeave a comment

If you ever asked me what I am doing tomorrow, I’ll be in bed. My dream job would involve somebody in bed. Tell me about the good life, and I would want to jump out of bed as much as to climb back in. And I Will, Tomorrow, ha

Sunday, June 28, 2020

Log 363 ~And I Will, Tomorrow~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but you will be tomorrow, won’t you? As long as you’re better at making decisions than I was, say yesterday. Hell, I spent four hours debating between a Piggie Potato, Chicken Tenders, and Pizza. Which one did I choose? A Ham & Cheddar Hot Pocket and a bag of popcorn and why? Because you’ll sit right here at 4 AM saying tomorrow, “And what does that get you—NOTHING.” I wish but congratulations, you’re going to Hell.

Tomorrow you’ll give up FAPPING and what happens? It hasn’t been twenty-four hours, but all you have to do is pick up your phone. See, I like that fear that courses through you, that Paranoia! Cha-Cha-Cha. Better the sweat of your brow than other secretions. Speaking of which, tomorrow you will work for what you want, isn’t that right? Shouldn’t you be writing, and I mean more than us having this petty conversation. Camp NaNoWriMo begins this week, and you would never fail that would you? Yeah, as you would never fail to get up each and every morning. To go to the FREAKING Day Job that you hate because you know tomorrow and the day after, the year, your life. Such a thing you are in Six Impossible Things.

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 032 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM NOT Going To Spend All Week Crying But Making Up…
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late by Colleen Hoover
    Failed

One point, only because you’re still breathing, and I don’t mean easy even in your bed. Tomorrow you’ll get out of bed and walk down to the dining room table? I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry at the thought. Now you would cry over MILF Dos’s Yabbos. Okay, let’s think with the other head, namely the one on top. Will you have the guts to call and get an appointment for a haircut? SIGH, now that’s a grander debate than wanting to order food, isn’t that right? Between getting new boots, your ears lowered. Or buying that Norah Lace French Top and Flutter Tap Panty. It’s not like you’ll have a submissive to wear it anytime soon. I suppose tomorrow you’ll be Emeric Marceaux from Dark Notes, am I right? How about another song? “You’ll find a woman, and you’ll find love.” How about you find out about these Six Impossible Things.

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Going To Mow Both Lawns Before The End Of The Week
  6. I AM Finishing Too Late, Colleen Hoover

In the end, you don’t want to hmm… There’s always another day, and you know what Stephen King said about Hell. That’s still today, so escaping, And I Will, Tomorrow?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 362 ~A Breath Of Will~

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I hate these words probably as much as my Day Job “Another Day,” and that means I’m still breathing and not wasting my breath trying to be, well me. One day when I’m drowning in cash. A Breath Of Will

Saturday, June 27, 2020

Log 362 ~A Breath Of Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I can breathe without it. I Can’t Breathe, are dangerous words, and that’s why I prefer to keep my mouth shut. When I take in the air to speak, um, that hasn’t been going to well lately. Hell, aren’t my fingers an even bigger problem?

As you know, I started NO FAP yet again. Yeah, I’m in that 24 Hour state of clarity. Lady Lu, as the song goes, I’ll never fall in love again. I’m starting to remember all those years ago when I discovered RealDoll. Now, this might be more of a confession for Inspector Echo, but with all, I’ve admitted? I did enter the RealDoll give away for the summer. What, are you going to change my mind? I swear Lady Luna I’m not one of these “Incel” creeps. Over the past week, though, MILF Dos isn’t talking to me, and neither is Cherry. Two other girls don’t give me the time of day. It puts a whole new spin on “take my breath away.” More like I’m giving it away, and what about GULP? Did I get enough to eat yesterday, which is why I’m energized this morning? I Can’t Breathe.

I know not funny, like that dumbass political so and so. If it’s not women robbing me of my breath, it’s My Dæmon. Yes, he’s my handsome little boy, but he’s also an old man. Yesterday I thought he was getting sick yet again. I swear I hold my breath when he jumps from the bed or uses the stairs. I wonder how do I even get to sleep at night, and he’s right here beside me. I swear if it’s not a woman talking to me, it’s watching my kid’s little chest heave, up-down. He lives, and yet I say Luna, I Can’t Breathe.

How I wish I could say something righteous or anything that might mean anything someday. Why not work on my story, make money, buy a made girl, or actual MILF? We’ll see, won’t we, when I get back walking my child. I should breathe easy now that hey, I put some new shoes on. Funny, my stinky boots didn’t bother me when I went out yesterday. With the plague and being a black man, but I wasn’t holding my breath. Walking on eggshells, broken glass, take A Breath Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear