Chronicle 150 ~B There One Day~

If I could have one day, any day at all, well, it would be one with B in the world. I dreamed of a beach day with a wife and two kids, Braxton on a blanket. Another with Braxton and my two kids and then running to me, old man he is. “B There One Day”

Sunday, November 28, 2021

Chronicle 150 ~B There One Day~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and as dismissive as I want to be towards you, I’ll say this… you can make it.

But as for now, you’re ashamed. So you are one day away from the end. “Behave In The Cherry Patch.” So the shame; you think of how you should have been toward B III, hmm? You’ve blown off getting your eyes checked and the car fixed, and because of what? It’s the story. One story that won’t ever be published or read, and come Monday, nothing. Like everything else in your life, you go through the motions of accomplishment. But never the acceptance that it all means nothing. The only exception, of course, is B III. Did you refill his water bowl this evening? Yeah, while you were dicking off. You’ll be late to watching Fear The Walking Dead. Even later with Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Only Gone From Your Sight, Kate McGahan, Jack McAfghan
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 011 No Fap)
  5. I WILL Work On A Tattoo Of B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I swear, will there come a day where this list will be checked off. Every single thing but, of course, this is my failure and my disgrace. You will have yours soon, no question there. Now I’m starting to understand why you’ve got “A Sincere Warning About the Entity in Your Home.” That’s how you feel, knowing I’m trying to warn you about the past. Dammit, the future looks like right now, which means you won’t heed it. If I can offer you any comfort at all. You won’t be writing until 7:10 PM in the evening or later with wasted ick. You are the monster, and one day… well, you don’t even know what to hope for. Is it peace or Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading A Sincere Warning About the Entity in Your Home
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 011 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Work On A Tattoo Of B III
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

The Day Job week hasn’t even begun yet, and you’re hating that song “Someday At Christmas.” No offense to Stevie Wonder, but why then? Why not right now with things. You drift back and forth between someday and one day, and most you wish you didn’t have to wake up at all. Who knows how you’ll pass this night but to finish the book, hmm? That right there is why you write. For that moment of doing something… I don’t know great, generous, gross, but you’ve read plenty of books like that. Remember Succubus, yep. One day I won’t feel like a failure, and you won’t be seeing it down the road. Someday B III will see what you were trying. B There One Day

301 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Episode 225 ~Someday Is Not A Measurement~

Someday is more than a song I played when I thought I was going back to juvenile detention or winding up in real trouble, and more than the idea of “Happy Thoughts” that should be in my reality. “Someday Is Not A Measurement”

Monday, February 11, 2019

Episode 225 ~Someday Is Not A Measurement~

Seventy-First Rule Madam Justice

How To Make One Million Dollars, take it, and no I don’t mean stealing it though there are plenty of “legit” laws on the books to do such a thing, what I mean is I have the right to have a million dollars. You know before talking to you I had a ranting session in my “crazy” brain about the day job and what I didn’t do the last time I was there, which to quote Bob Marley & The Wailers “Get Up Stand Up.”

Now I’ve said for a few days that I do when it comes to the day job, there is no someday, I get up right when I need to, I fight to get there on time, there isn’t a someday I’ll get this right it’s I have to get this right. Someday I’ll be the boss… no, because I don’t want to be; I’ve heard about reigning in Hell, than serving Heaven but honestly I would choose death because there was no someday I’ll kill myself, sleeping pills, Nyquil painkillers, many aspirins. Someday we all die, no one day we all die maybe several times over because for every day that starts with Y we write in someday, and where is that on the calendar, the timestamp, ruler, hell how far is it from the bedroom to this table, to the dining room, to anywhere.

Forever and a day I could quote my MOTIVATIONS or give you another song like “Someday At Christmas” why Stevie, are we talking before, during, or after, how about when I dream of revenge against my father “In The Air Tonight” how old is he again? In 1984 Winston is told that victory against Big Brother in his lifetime is not possible, he will work, do what he can, be caught, confess, and cut from the pages of history, happiness indeed was not a possibility because what happens then. I don’t want to wait until someday to find out, but again we have fear. How will I feel when I get that PS4, perhaps that next day of work, if that mom I asked out says yes, it’s just a thing, mad as Hell, and she won’t, I know that.

Someday I won’t be happy because shouldn’t I be happy now or would I instead call myself out on my language when I curse; when I say someday, what I mean is never, maybe always means no, fear is choosing to be the victim. Madam Justice, I don’t want SOMEDAY, I wish today. I’ll play Detroit: Become Human because I have time, energy, happiness, ONE DAY I’ll tell every manager to fuck off because I don’t need their work, Wednesday or Thursday I’ll have dinner with a remarkable woman and watch a movie, I know Someday Is Not A Measurement.

I Will Have No Fear