Tag: Rules

Log 084 ~When Does A King Kneel~

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“There is a king in me” as the song goes or I should research a bit of history because it might be easier to find than the things I have been looking for on any given day; enough to bring anyone to their knees. “When Does A King Kneel”

Monday, September 23, 2019

Log 084 ~When Does A King Kneel~

Hundred And Third Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Millionaire right now and soon to be “Like A Boss” as the kids say nowadays. Not today and not tomorrow and yeah I hear you saying and why not. Too busy being a time traveler. Yes, I want to have that moment where The Day Job will be nothing but a horrible memory. I’m sure I will have a woman somewhere to thank for that luck. No, let’s call it something else, like perseverance. Now such a thing requires me to be on my feet or punching these keys daily.

Now’s not the time to sleep, so what else can I do Madam Justice? As the song goes, Run Boy Run, and we’ve talked about it stemming from fear. Eric Thomas says you have to attack the fight, but I still hate math class. Only when was I in a class last, and today (Sunday) I was only counting money. Of course, that leads me to research. If I’m not on the keys, I should be like Bill Gates and read books faster. I’ve been listening to way too many motivations last week, which leads me to my point. When does a king kneel, there is no porno for dummies (LANGUAGE). You know how I feel about words like that but back to the point. Madam Justice there is no master to teach me how. I wanted to go into stocks, but there are none, or I’m not looking hard enough. Of course, I’m looking for actresses, Saturday was bust.

Again I was on my knees this morning counting up the cash, so that’s why I’m starting with modeling. I have my Firstborn, so I’m always kneeling to clean up after the kid and cuddle. One should stop and smell the roses too or play games; I haven’t done either lately. No Madam Justice when I kneel, I’m hiding. Care to take a knee for a noble cause? Never I’m at the fucking Day Job (LANGUAGE). The man who would be king falls out of pain and service. Now I don’t mind service, but the question is how. Again I’m studying other artists on Patreon and adult entertainment. Why would anyone pay $75.00 for a naked character in something I’ve written myself? Do I believe people would fall so quickly, well haven’t I Madam Justice?

Am I a man hmm? When Does A King Kneel?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 077 ~Great, Just Be A Man~

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I’m better than I was yesterday, but everything within me wants to argue you that fact and I need only wait until I get around some people and what the hell will happen to my manhood. Great, Just Be A Man.

Monday, September 16, 2019

Log 077 ~Great, Just Be A Man~

Hundred And Second Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Millionaire right now and remain a stickler for time. Haven’t I always been and with the Day Job? I need to be a step ahead, still. Does that mean I’m running? Well, Run Boy Run. The question is, where am I going, hell I’m always running at the Day Job. I woke up this morning (Sunday) because of a nightmare. Remember “Stupidest” from the Day Job; the dream had me running from a gaggle of them. Somebody killed me, but I don’t know who. Anyway, the moral I got was they were the better man.

Which, of course, leads me to today? Yesterday I got my Patreon running, and this morning I got my modeling page up. These are the thoughts of a businessman, a man that is doing. You know I’m always on the cusp of quoting Yoda or some great erotic writer. If I were only to be me though SIGH I’m upset I lost a Facebook friend. I’ll be in a bad mood for this week for a variety of reasons. Oh yeah, and the first block I was expecting came from the unexpected. What the hell NaNoWriMo I thought it was a funny meme. Speaking of pictures, what’s that I said about a modeling page? Can you believe I had the nerve? The moment I start talking about cover girls, I get a message from my publisher. Now that gave me a chill without a doubt.

To think; that’s one reason I hate fear so much, it stops you from thinking. Anyway, I want to live such a life, and the smallest things get in the way. You know maybe that’s the rub. Now, this is more Lady Sophia’s thing, but a writer is akin to a god. The idea is after I create the man has to deal with the mess. Mountain from a molehill so you might ask me why go all out. Again it makes me feel great and then I know I’ll have to get by when it comes to life. If I had my way Madam Justice I would be strong enough to tell people to Fuck Off (LANGUAGE). What happens to those kinds of people in my stories? One of my motivations says to be the hero of your story. Why live History books? Before that Madam Justice, needn’t be Great, Just Be A Man?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 070 ~Just Wake The “Hell” Up~

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When you’re asleep the monsters can’t get you, I heard that in Blue Gender but what am I going to hear tomorrow, chances are it’s going to be all kinds of Hell, but I refuse to lie there and take it anymore. Just Wake The “Hell” Up

Monday, September 9, 2019

Log 070 ~Just Wake The “Hell” Up~

Hundred And First Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and also a Time Traveler. Not only because I’m from 1984 literally. Yes I know I’m starting this on a Sunday. If I were, to be honest, Monday has always been a bad day. Eric Thomas does his TGIM’s Thank God It’s Monday. I have a few in my motivational playlist. The thing is, as the rule states, I need to wake up; I mean to everything Madam Justice. As the song goes, open your eyes, look up to the skies and see. Wishing on a star.

Most mornings, when I get up there is nothing but darkness. I can blame The Day Job or my ambitions. The sad thing is, when it’s The Day Job, next comes the bathroom light. I’m a writer, aren’t I? Shouldn’t I be taking that darkness and getting it down on the page? You know the only thing I love more is my Firstborn. Sometimes I see his cute furry face looking at me for his daily walk. He’s there, the sun is up, the birds, everything. It’s a disservice to keep my head down. It’s like I’m looking for real estate, you know. Find a spot and start digging. I look at my life anticipating a zombie apocalypse you know. Often I imagine I’ll make the perfect survivor, but these days I feel like I’m dead. Who knows what could happen as they always say, live each day as though it’s your last; do I?

Well, today (Sunday) I took a step in that direction. You want to know why I feel dead Madam Justice. It’s illegal for me to be alive. Why do I find solace amongst the dead, the machines, I speak on clones. I write about beasts because they have that excuse. It’s too damn easy to lie there and be a joke. Most people aren’t alive; they’re fucking noisemakers (LANGUAGE). Then those same idiots wonder why they are so exhausted all the time. We aren’t allowed to rest because we are too busy always being someone else or something. You know what wakes me up, a pretty face and a nice pair of boobs. The fact that I will look any man or beast in the eye that threatens my kid. Having a damn brain SIGH.

I can’t sleep away life; I’ll face the living nightmares. Just Wake The “Hell” Up

I Will Have No Fear

Log 063 ~Winning Isn’t Fighting Our Hate~

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I’m against the NRA, but for background checks; military spending is crazy, but I wouldn’t mind building an armory; not one for Jesus, yet the dead will walk the Earth one day. Winning Isn’t Fighting Our Hate but waiting to see what we love the most.

Monday, September 2, 2019

Log 063 ~Winning Isn’t Fighting Our Hate~

One-Hundredth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and that’s good because I need plenty of weapons. It’s in the life goals list to build an armory. Indiana Gone would tell you I’m a true believer in the coming zombie apocalypse. Do you think I’ll have time to “define” all my rules before then? Hell Madam Justice what about counting up all my blessings? Seeing as how I’m on Writing Reason 343 I’ll need a new list soon. If I counted up everything I hate, I would never stop. What about everything that tempts me. Today’s spanky is quite small, Jessica Nigri and Katelyn Nacon, blonde, brunette.

Now some might ask me why I mention black women rarely, if at all. It’s the white women who are creeped out the fastest and block me fast, I have seen. I love my mom, and my sister is alright. One day I’ll go all into it, but in truth, black women exhaust me Madam Justice. All women can tire a man, but first, there are those that I chase. Some get me high but require a week or so of rehab. Some to be sure will look for a fight. Finally, the last of them make me run. Tell me which is worse hate or indifference? At the moment, ironically, I hate indifference. Take for example, the NO FAP Challenge. Fighting against my nature sucks but ignoring it daily. You wonder why I am so exhausted. How do “THEY” say hurry up and wait.

Sounds like an erotica novel, waiting for Brandt and Harper to fall in love. Speaking of love, isn’t that me and writing. Writing, Women, and Wealth; I wrote a whole thing yesterday trying to get women naked with wealth. For those of you keeping score $1,029.70 and that’s not counting the bank. Doesn’t sound like one million? A couple thousand more there, and a few thousand more on my RD investment. One of the reasons I’m not afraid of poverty or plan to make money on tits. Sorry to sound crass but being horny can be a bitch (LANGUAGE). Let me talk about something I hate. There’s Failure, Anxiety, Terror, Hate, Error, Revulsion. Again if you’re keeping track that spells FATHER, talk about ideas. Also, you have to excuse me for watching a bit of Divergent this morning Madam Justice.

You either embrace or ignore, Winning Isn’t Fighting Our Hate.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 056 ~We Save What We Love~

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Rose’s sister gave her life to save the Resistance, “Sister Maria” was almost died to fulfill Raphael’s dream, FYI that doesn’t work on real women, a redhead told me no to my fantasy, one more thing saved online and in my head. “We Save What We Love”

Monday, August 26, 2019

Log 056 ~We Save What We Love~

Ninety-Ninth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and you know I’m trying to save money. I love sleep, I love my kid. Should I say my phone and Facebook too? What about women, no real temptation today. Well, Sesskasays aka Jessica and Katie o’shaughnessy. Of course this is because Fear The Walking Dead last night. There is a place in my heart for brunettes. Still, I blame Jessica, Willow, and Ellie for my redhead fetish. Tattoos aren’t my thing ahem MILF Dos, but her and Katie, talk about dedication or love.

I’m going to get a few of my own someday. Tattoos I mean, one for my son and one for every book I publish. Again saving what we love, my writing, and the reason we have our daily conversation. Day 786 in truth. Not that it matters, but I saw this is my 1,002 blogpost. If saving something means you love it, poor me indeed. How about I chalk up everything to saving my black ass (LANGUAGE). Sounds a bit selfish right? I want to save the Earth because I still have to live in it Madam Justice. I want to play the hero to the damsels because I have nothing but respect for women. Okay, in my own way. Is that why I prefer the role of a villain? I live in dystopias, in endings because there is so much less. A real thing you know, exhaustion trying to be the one who can.

Why not at the question as the song goes What Is Love? I finished Raphael by Tillie Cole Saturday, and there’s this quote that got me thinking. “Sin Is Simply Due To The Absence Of Love.” With that being said, do I hate myself or to quote another song, is this love? Seeing as how I’m on a roll with songs and quotes, “fear is the heart of love.” Above all else I understand this Madam Justice. I spent a whole decade saving my heart to the page and where are those sheets now? Trash cans, police records, and books still not getting published. If I keep going at this rate about love and such I fear I won’t stop. Basics, I stole the line from Last Jedi? I don’t fall in love anymore, but lust and that doesn’t mean I don’t care, I’m saying.

Wish I had Sister Maria, We Save What We Love.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 049 ~The Greatest Teacher Failure Is~

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Master Yoda was wise, but the Jedi were wrong and didn’t I sell all my Star Wars games at somewhat, “Indian Gone” would gasp. Hey, I like money and what do I do with it anyway. “The Greatest Teacher Failure Is”

Monday, August 19, 2019

Log 049 ~The Greatest Teacher Failure Is~

Ninety-Eighth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but not a billionaire. If you don’t know me by now as the song goes, I’m obsessed with money. Second is porn, and the third is making a list. Didn’t I say I need to record my temptations? Downloading a Riley Reid Porn and searching American Teen Lily Carter. As for globally, there’s this European model Alissa. What is it about brunettes or girls with dark hair? Not that I can leave out Kagney Linn Karter. Anyway, the fact that I’m talking to you Madam Justice is a victory.

Only today I’m supposed to talk about failure. In all honesty, all I’m getting is try harder. Should I listen to my motivations that always say, be grateful? One more list to put down. Every Sunday, I have my Six Impossible Things, which is true enough. Of those six currently, I’ve failed one. It’s Monday, and I didn’t renew my Firstborn’s membership. So I’m blessed to know exactly where he is, in his home. I didn’t read last night, but I’m ahead. I could still lose myself in a pornographic haze, but we’re having a conversation. I’m not looking at hundreds of emails. How about I can remember enough of my last read book to write a review. Yes, I fail plenty, but each day I should be thankful that I get another shot but yeah that list to write.

  1. Firstborn
  2. Writing
  3. Money
  4. Porn
  5. Lists
  6. Gaming

Money only edges out porn, and I’ll tell you why. I didn’t buy any TTB videos yesterday. The Cosplayer still has videos. Again I’m ignoring. I didn’t take money from my most significant investment to date heading out Nevada way. Talk about a failure I’m still cringing over. I hate letting pretty girls down. Here’s another list for you Fear, Failure, and Fapping (LANGUAGE). I’m always afraid, so I hate myself. Fapping, of course, feels fantastic, but the moment after I get failure. I despise failure but again a great teacher. Remember Detroit: Become Human when Connor died, and I dealt with it. In Heavy Rain, Ethan got arrested, and I restarted that part of the game. So I learned what not to do, or I learned losing still irks me somewhat, I don’t know. Like Think And Grow Rich?

My life is failing; will I start learning? The Greatest Teacher Failure Is

I Will Have No Fear

Log 042 ~Live Like There’s No Tomorrow~

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Am I going back to that, the world is going to end in “five minutes” mentality; if died today I would be embarrassed at everything, well other than reading another Tillie Cole novel but anyway. “Live Like There’s No Tomorrow”

Monday, August 12, 2019

Log 042 ~Live Like There’s No Tomorrow~

Ninety-Seventh Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but I didn’t do two girls at the same time. Now that’s only for starters for if tomorrow never comes? Well, I’ve thought about that plenty of nights. Most nights I don’t ever plan on the morning. Okay, my knives and my car alarm say differently. Those are more for my son, though. My motivations say to start every morning with gratitude. I’m grateful Madam Justice I am. Still, I sometimes imagine waking up and starting all over again.

Do any of us wake up and live the day we would be proud to die? So I wake up this morning to the TWD Rewards people treating me like I’m STUPID. Until only now, I had forgotten about that concern. Besides talking to you, I could use a cappuccino and a slice of cheesecake. Worrying robs you of the joy you might have so I owe myself a slice. You know the days are wrong when you pray for a zombie apocalypse. Hell, I want the days I stand a chance in if anything. Again living those “five minutes” and the world comes to an end. I’ve lived far too many suicidal days. There was the day I had Taco Bell and fell asleep downing Nyquil pills attempting an overdose. I’ve starved myself for at least a week, and nobody gave a damn. I’ve studied poisons, weapons, I write dystopias ha. Ironic, I see tomorrow for everyone else but myself; I don’t live now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fqUrOuaPTE

If I could have today again, picture it as so. I wake up next to my beautiful wife. I go to my office, and we talk well more like Lady Sophia and me because it’s a Friday. My wife and I make love in the shower, and then she cooks breakfast. We both see the children off to school, while my firstborn does patrol of the Estate. I pop in on a few of my brothels see how business is going. I visit my studio and work on a movie. Then it’s off to interview the newest crop of models. I pick up my kids, and they tell me about good days at school. Home-cooked dinner, in a loving home. A book before bed then me and my wife ravish each other. Who would need another Saturday? Never enough time right Madam Justice but to Live Like There’s No Tomorrow.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 035 ~Nothing To Prove To Anybody~

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The lives we live or survive, some people have wealth, others have scars, some have only an inch of air in front of their face, and that in itself can be too much, why are they so deserving, am I? Nothing To Prove To Anybody.

Monday, August 5, 2019

Log 035 ~Nothing To Prove To Anybody~

Ninety-Sixth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but you don’t have to believe that. How about the fact that I respect women? Sure doesn’t look that way right? What about that I do my best at the Day Job? The idea that I love my firstborn more than anything? Of course, the big one these days would be that I’m an innocent man. It’s 4 AM, and you know the reason I’m up. For the record, I did get about six hours of sleep, and I still haven’t checked Facebook yet.

Speaking of which, when I do post some political discord there, it’s what I believe. I’m not trying to prove I’m a Dem, Liberal, or anything, only that this is what I know. Hell like Jon Snow everyone says I know nothing, but he was just himself. The problem is he didn’t know who that was most of the time. I should stop comparing myself to him, though. As always I avoid the man in the mirror too. Yesterday though I had to shave and I saw all the grey hairs; how did I get so old not living? Even now it’s like I need permission to exist. I need to prove I have the right to such a thing. My Six Impossible Things list, I have to prove I’m a good father, a man, I get apps to try and hold myself accountable Justice.

What about September, am I going to make it to Nevada. $200.00 for a number I never use, how much do I spend on Brainbuddy, and I was checking out some Cosplayer. If anything I’m proving fear runs my life and I get that for free. Let’s not forget the other $250 for my book and even more for a cover. What about all the motivational speakers I listen to or the time spent lost in music wanting to feel brave. Don’t be brave, have a little common sense as one song goes. All this effort for people that don’t give a damn and hell I don’t either. That is until something hurts them like the hack job. Again being a dominant and a sadist I get turned on by pain but only that which I control. Pain proves we’re still alive, so why don’t I embrace all of it in my life Madam Justice.

The answer is still this, Nothing To Prove To Anybody.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 028 ~Always Be Prepared For War~

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Last week I talked about people giving orders, but I once heard in a game “a man chooses, a slave obeys” I never chose to be this way, no I was a slave of my looks, my words, my desires things that make me want to fight. Always Be Prepared For War ha

Monday, July 29, 2019

Log 028 ~Always Be Prepared For War~

Ninety-Fifth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but I am not ready for power. Like today Madam Justice I was not prepared for war. Every day I gird myself for disappointment. I know that my days at the Day Job will bring about more humiliation. Last week was nothing but one fuck-up (LANGUAGE) after another worried about this week. In the morning, I tell myself I’ll wake up early to read, and then I cut my alarm off. I want to fight temptation, and then I have horrific FTWD fantasies. Worst thought I was not down for the cause, again ready for wickedness, winning, for war.

So what brought this on, my C-3PO feelings of being helpless. How do you even define helpless? “Unable to defend oneself or to act without help.” There’s “Uncontrollable,” I think that about covers it Madam Justice. No positive vibes today but I still no better than to wish harm. However, I couldn’t stop three girls from laughing at me. My General Manager continues to treat me like I’m retarded. The usual manager is useless and treats me as a child. Haven’t I mentioned he’s pretty touchy-feely? Weak, Pathetic, Useless, I’m going against all my motivations right now. If it wasn’t that, it was fucking anger (LANGUAGE) today, I wanted to fight no doubt. I tried to march into the GM’s office all day. “Look I’m leaving, I’m not some fucking retard, and not some damn virus” (YES AGAIN). It was like being back in school with both teams saying you take him he’s not wanted.

Is that why I’m taking what’s going on in my country so personally. From metal to a man that controls it, Magneto; I know what it’s like to be shit on for everything (MORE). It’s because you’re black, skinny, fucked up teeth, you wear the same clothes. I know what it’s like to wear a FUBU shirt (youth) and be sitting by yourself the very next day. I see how easy people have it, the laws. Still, because there is work to do people like me are considered ungrateful. Rule 13 states Power Is All That Matters. Like Markus in DBH, (still a great game) if people want to crack jokes and tear me down okay. Use their stones for fortresses, the pen and keyboard are my swords. Hellfire is how my armor’s forged;, they instilled it in the flesh. Always Be Prepared For War.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

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Camp NaNoWriMo, well general NaNoWriMo says 50,000 words, so I get it done, Brainbuddy suggest a podcast, and I listen to a bit, and of course, B III demands his morning stroll, when will someone follow me. Give Orders You Would Follow

Monday, July 22, 2019

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

Ninety-Fourth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and you can be too. Yeah, I sound like one of my many motivations, Eric Thomas, Tom Bilyeu, Ray Lewis, etc. A better way of saying today’s rule might be Practice What You Preach. Yesterday, for example, I told myself I was going to finish my story, and I did so. Because Camp NaNoWriMo says, you can write 50,000 words in 30 days I finished. Even this morning, while I was on Brainbuddy for once. I read about this podcast, Porn Free Radio #185 How Successful Guys Overcome Edging.

My point is Madam Justice is I want to be a leader. You can’t lead, though unless you know what it means to follow. In my experience, I have known too many corrupt leaders. I always speak about the men that I admire. In these past days, I can add many more women. Don’t look at me like that, I respect women despite my BDSM teachings and dirty talk. Hell in my novel, the head honcho was a woman, the Mistress Director, and she’s a female I despise. Sadly though the leaders I’m surrounded by either make me laugh or make my blood boil. There’s the General Manager at the Day Job, A&W, my “father,” more. I want to be the best leader I can be for those who would follow. I’m a traditionalist, and I believe that a man, a husband, a father must lead his family, you know.

Any true leader of men, a commander, a general, a king, must be willing to die for those he leads. You know I’m not afraid to die, I’m scared to look STUPID. Madam Justice that remains my trigger. The fear that those under my charge will know failure because of my direction. They will know dejection, destruction, and death, and I will not do that to anyone. Strangely enough, my leaders lead me to such things. Brainbuddy is one of the few things that drive me towards being a better person. Rather than hating myself. If you give orders that should be the goal, for betterment. Soldiers will die to protect their families, their country. A submissive and dominant are both set free with their power. My son is happy because he knows I defend him, rethink the leash dynamic.

“Higher, Faster, Further baby” didn’t I say I respect women; Give Orders You Would Follow.

I Will Have No Fear