Log 334 ~Will The Track Star~

Didn’t I say don’t ask me about the Day Job? I asked the question, what would happen if I stood up? The answer, have a Panic Attack and run out the door. Is that what I’m calling it now, thank you WebMD because it beats cowardice. Will The Track Star

Saturday, May 30, 2020

Log 334 ~Will The Track Star~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how much is Usain Bolt making? I suppose I chose the right profession if I became the next J.K. Rowling snickers. How about E.L. James, Stephen King, Tillie Cole, or my latest “obsession” Eric Vall? Well, did I even write to Lady Sophia all that happened at the Day Job on Tuesday? Let’s see if I can DUMB it down. On Tuesday the 26th, I asked the General Manager what I should do? She told me to process Amazon Returns. Ten minutes later, I had a Panic Attack and left.

What did we say about checking WebMD? Hell, what did we decide on making excuses? The biggest question is, what am I going to do with my life? As the song goes, I can’t live my life this way. What, in fear, am I afraid? How come I’m scared so GODDAM ALWAYS! Pardon the language Lady Luna, but this isn’t like The Eve of a Cherry. Not like I kept track of all the F-Bombs in that. Speaking of which, it’s Cherry’s Birthday on the 28th. Only did I mention her in any conversations before this one. Happy Birthday, Cherry. There’s so much to keep track of, My Lady. That’s how I was feeling Tuesday. My emotions were shot to Hell besides my fear and my anger. It was like being back in school, and the two bullies have my cap throwing it between them. Yeah, so I like hoodies.

So how do I feel right now? Why don’t you tell me, Lady Luna, how one schedules a mental breakdown? Do I talk about today, being Wednesday? The rest of the week, or what should be Saturday? Now my stomach’s in knots, the week hopefully employed, Saturday angry. No wonder I’m so tired? During the day, I’m running, from my father, from the Day Job, and even my bed. Of course, I’m sitting here right now talking to you. You could say I’m living the dream, beautiful girl in my bed, conversation, a good song. Dreaming… I have to fill my head with everything from well all the above. Money, writers I’ve read, excuses, music, Jeff Daniels, birthdays, Bobby Hill, more. I track everything because, in my real life, we’re just Dancing In The Dark.

Or running my Lady Luna, wouldn’t you say. Tired, Scared of Will The Track Star.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 327 ~A Will Too Far~

Last week I said I’m no good without a nap, and this week, I’m still angry, horny, and please don’t ask me about the Day Job, yeah I torture myself enough with that, and if I ever stood up? A Will Too Far.

Saturday, May 23, 2020

Log 327 ~A Will Too Far~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and some people would say that’s way too much. There’s no such thing as too much money, which is why MY country is the way it is. Now I don’t want to get super political with you. It seems that my nap didn’t help, but does it ever? What I’m getting at is, I have such grand dreams (when I’m not sleeping). Considering what I want to do with MY life, I take heat for the smallest things. So since I won’t give you the speech to my boss, let’s go over a few other things.

Yes, I still hate being a liar, but let’s start with my Day Job. AHEM I did not survive this “poop” to be treated like I’m stupid. I might yell at the next huddle at the lot of them. Hell, if it hadn’t been for that one lady asking about my kid, I would say, I hate all of them. So what about my kid? I know he must be sick of his old man spending all his time writing. I still love him like pancakes, but here he is sleeping, knowing it counts as quality time. He loves his walks and wishes they were longer. I hear him often enough. Now that explains why I got the worst night’s sleep. I swear my bed at this point might as well be a trash heap. A fly was making the rounds all night buzzing. I thought there was a beehive above me. Wouldn’t that be awesome, and no “honey” to show for it, makes sense.

Now on women, today’s the first day of NO FAP, again. 1 day, 5 hr, 14 min, 30 sec to be precise. I saw Lisa Peachy right after napping, so I hopped out of bed. There are reasons I can’t do Brainbuddy or Covenant Eyes. My wheelhouse, my writing, their writing. Lady Luna too much information, am I right? Nobody knows me, though, and the ones that ask. Well, they stop talking to me. Even here, I put up a Spotify link, but as the song goes, I gotta enemies. It’s like I’m behind bars in one sense or another. I’m trying to keep the Beast in, keep the Boy out, and end up being a Bastard, pardon my French.

Freedom Lady Lu, now that is A Will Too Far.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 320 ~The “Way Out” Will~

I and no good without my nap, but I have worse crimes, of course, and here I am plotting some sort of way out, or at least I hope so. How much is it going to cost me though $45 or more, hmm? The “Way Out” Will.

Saturday, May 16, 2020

Log 320 ~The “Way Out” Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how? Now you know how I hate sounding like the President. There are plenty of ways I would like this period in history to end though I lack the “liberty” to share them. Besides, we should talk about me and How’s It Going To End?

Should we talk about Thursday, seeing as how it’s Wednesday now? You’re seeing this as Saturday, though. The wonders of Time-Travel. Chances are I ain’t no fortunate son. Yeah, still at the Day Job and next week; there’s no end looks like. When’s the last time I finished a video game? Far Cry 5, NOPE, Heavy Rain, negative, Call me a Legend, are you serious with my little virtual harem? I know Lady Luna, but what was I doing in the shower? I see all my secrets coming to light, losing the social life that I do have, or being oh so sorry. Again there might not be an end, only repeating everything over and over. I’m sorry if I sound down, but this is what happens when I don’t get my afternoon nap. You know I still hate waking up early, and for what?

If there is an end, I hope it’s not like my books, me breaking, or a bunch of lost bucks. The emptiness Lady Luna, that’s the only way I can describe it. It feels so good, but then there’s only okay, and what do I have to show for it. 50,000 words, a clear mind for a few hours, or making some pretty girl happy. That’s what I have been sitting here contemplating. $45 to become a Patron. I only now got the Day Job back, and today I want to spend money, quick escape.

No Lady Lu, I’m talking to you because as the song goes, I’m Gonna Be Somebody. Funny, I use the song from Police Academy, and how often do I break the law? Yeah, I’m not behind bars… been there done that when I was in juvenile detention. It’s not like Coronavirus (COVID-19) did a number on me. Other than a bunch of new rules, and yes, I’m still mad at Academy Sports + Outdoors. I don’t let go of anything, right? My way out is with Bucks, Babes, and let’s say Biology for now, hmm?

So how to obtain those things, The “Way Out” Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 313 ~Will The New World~

Well, last week I asked what I do for money, and now sometime soon it will be back to the Day Job, I suppose. Indeed I finished one book and was working on a long-overdue poetry compilation. Will The New World?

Saturday, May 9, 2020

Log 313 ~Will The New World~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I should be all into the. Brand New, as the song goes. Lady Lu, as per usual, I speak to you two days from the past. Time travel can be quite finicky, so if I told you I would find myself here? I’m a man having a panic attack, exhausted, well hell, isn’t that every day? Today though, I have received my marching orders to return to the world. Only the place I knew wasn’t so great. The land that awaits me, I’m not looking forward to. For now, I can’t see the aftermath, but there are other worlds.

“Only a man unable to handle the actual world would create another one in which to hide.”
― Andrew Davidson

I’m not suicidal, but at this moment, I want to return to the blackness of sleep. It’s no secret that I’m lazy above everything Lady Luna. Look, you’re my first girl, my favorite… my light in the dark, closest to where I want to be. In the night, not having to face the new day. Only when I find myself thrown into the world, I build new ones. One more reason that I’m a writer. I need somewhere to go, but then it’s like something out of The Handmaid’s Tale. My worlds are never “Better” for everyone, especially women, but I’m not in the mood today. I don’t wish to be one of these STUPID people comparing having a Day Job to some worse part of history. Still, I feel like I am doomed to repeat it as soon as I leave this “warm” bed.

“Better never means better for everyone… It always means worse, for some.”
― Margaret Atwood

I say it like that because I’m not sure if it’s the weather or my blood running cold. Fear freezes me, and there’s another F-Word that heats me right up. I’m not angry, though, and the other feeling I’m avoiding like the plague all around us. Coronavirus (COVID-19) hasn’t given me the world I imagined, as if I could handle it. Again I’m sitting here in bed trying not to think how good I had it and all the work I could have gotten done. Now I sound like Trump wasting my time. I don’t believe I will have the luxury of losing myself to the music or some audiobook. If I call upon the future, it will always be for My Dæmon’s continued health and the world I wish to build for him.

Today though (Thursday), is this normal or Will The New World…

I Will Have No Fear

Log 151 ~Will’s Story Later On~

I want to tell you I got a solid eight hours of sleep if anything I want to start reading again and recounting what I learned at night, instead of going over old stories, and what about my life story? “Will’s Story Later On.”

Friday, November 29, 2019

Log 151 ~Will’s Story Later On~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now and a liar, I suppose. Today I’m not sure how many I told from being out of a particular product. How about that someone else will pick up a bunch of Barbie dolls. It could be the smile I had to wear. Never mind the one on feeling any better. Now Lady Sophia, I am a fiction writer, well not today, story over and done with yesterday. I should still sign in with NaNoWriMo, I owe them a lot, making it.

Bills are only stories of the people you owe. Don’t ask me where that came from Lady Sophia. I’ve said this before, but I still NEED to get Indiana Gone a Birthday gift and one for her Wedding. Money is the story of things you did. Well, that explains how little I’m paid or not at all. There’s also the fact that I’m not that proud of those things. My life to this point is, if anything, one long list of bad reviews. So you ask me can I do better and I spend one month attempting that. M Anime asked me to tell her the story about Indiana Gone’s Wedding. I couldn’t even share that story of love or my “COURAGE.” Still, I have plans to be that father who reads stories to his kids at night. Besides telling My Dæmon, I love him every time I leave the house; I can’t even say Good Morning to my “Pancake.”

What stories can I tell you then? Last year it was the ant invasion, this year it’s my ear being stopped up. It could be that my leg hurts as the Dæmon is sleeping on it still. I wasted the whole day napping because Black Friday sucks, and no, I wasn’t shopping. Like Carol from The Walking Dead, dealing with younglings is not my forte. Keeping track though I finished a 50,000-word book, neither is staying on task. I’m still watching TWD Reactions. I’m thinking about being “corrected” by Fandom Spotlite, aka The Governor. Do you know what I wished for this day? I wanted to start writing up bios, starting with the scientist from The “Wrist” Of Playing Chrono. Oh yeah, that’s another reminder that somebody tried to friend me on Facebook for my writing. But, I’ve lost followers.

Of course, that’s another story or Will’s Story Later On.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 144 ~How Will Tucks Tale~

You know when I was a child I liked “Reading Rainbow,” I named one of my grandma’s dogs Wishbone, I still watch A Christmas Story every year, and I could go on, but what am I reading nowadays and writing? How Will Tucks Tale?

Friday, November 22, 2019

Log 144 ~How Will Tucks Tale~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but that doesn’t mean I’m out of stories. You know I could have a few trillion in the bank if anything I want to look up even higher numbers. Only tonight, I have been looking more Greek mythology and Hollywood cinema. I wonder, would it be wrong to mention Raze (2013)? You know I still want to make movies one day, what type, however, is quite debatable. None I can tell you about, of course. There are so many stories I can’t share these days ever.

It seems that Day Job doesn’t want that Lady Sophia. Now it’s not what you think. I’m trying to finish The “Wrist” Of Playing Chrono, but you see what time it is right now. I barely took in any wrestling trying to stay awake. How about being a good friend, how long have I left M Anime hanging, and at least someone would read my texts. I’m looking at around 43,690 words for my novel. If I pushed it this weekend, I could finish. Still, I would rather watch wrestling. I like TWD. What about the deepest time-suck in my life? I swear I don’t mean anything by that SIGH (Ned Flanders Voice) “Got to be nice.” Did I mention that my little dæmon is bored out of his mind, waiting for his dad to finish chatting? I’ve completed NaNoWriMo twice, not counting the months of Camp NaNoWriMo as well.

A&W was sharing a story with me about some guy, and well, okay, that’s better left unsaid. It’s like I’m sleepwalking, and when I do find sleep, the stories I come up with Lady Sophia. I still haven’t picked up a book in ages, and while I’m at the Day Job, I say I’ll do better. It was all motivational talk today; okay confession I did listen to some TWD reactions as well. You know I only wish my story over this week was, not enough sleep, Day Job, food coma, repeat. If you want some gratitude, I have paid off my Grammarly bill so I can keep writing nonsense right. Well, more like incoherent, I suppose because I want to be all proper. I shared a laugh with Cherry over her name and her parents being hoity-toity. One more movie I miss is Newsies.

Instead, life is running me and How Will Tucks Tale.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 140 ~She Loves You Not Title~

I’m a BOSS, well not yet, I’m an author, not that either, a family man, well does my dog count and the occasional call from my mother when I “mess up” and as far as anyone else? She Loves You Not Title, but what am I now

Monday, November 18, 2019

Log 140 ~She Loves You Not Title~

Hundred And Eleventh Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but that shouldn’t matter, right? You know I’m not a prince, I could see myself shouting I’m King Of The World though. Between you and me, I know I’ll never be president. One of my motivations says, work hard, play hard, stay humble. When I get married, I still plan on dancing to that song, Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd. Now with all this out there, today I’m Will, and I’m still learning how that’s enough, it has to be Madam Justice.

You know every Sunday I say I’m going to be a better father but am I? My dæmon is eating, he’s warm and comfy, and takes his meds. Okay, so my father would throw money at his family, does that make him the “man of the year?” When it comes to my mom, I don’t have a clue what she thinks about me these days. It could be that I’m not much of a man because of Rockford. Sooner or later, I’ll finally write down the whole story of Indiana Gone’s wedding, not tonight, though. Yeah, momma, look at me, my significant accomplishments this evening? I wrote 1,200 words for the novel, I got Alpha in TWD, and I didn’t get fired. Speaking of which do you remember some time ago, I told you or one of the girls about Chris Pratt and Passengers. SIGH as the song goes, that’s how you know you messed up, still being somewhat polite.

Am I explaining what this has to do with today’s rule, if anything, honestly? I can be a lot of things to a particular woman, but one I refuse to be is a clown. Strange that I still buy into that quote from Marilyn Monroe about making a woman laugh. Look, I’ll even go the whole gold digger route because you know I want my money. Still, I said I was leaving that girl alone, and bam there is today. Yes, excuse me for always assuming the worst of people, and the jury is still out. I only wish I could be sure about people, but I’m not even sure about my kid. Women love illusion, but if you recall when I was a kid, I wanted to be a comedian. Is a girl laughing at my truths or at the joke I may portray?

She Loves You Not Title.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 137 ~Will “Byes” A Day~

Eric Thomas would say, “you owe you an explanation” and here it is, I got twenty-four hours, and I chose to sleep the day away and not take, hell I could even complain about the job on my kid’s nails. “Will “Byes” A Day”

Friday, November 15, 2019

Log 137 ~Will “Byes” A Day~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and to stay that way, I have to keep on my grind every day. So I ask myself today, what happened, Will? Let’s start with last night. I had finished speaking with you know who and suddenly I couldn’t post anything. I’m beginning to dislike my ISP. You can tell Lady Sophia that I’m attempting to keep myself in check for a variety of reasons. I only got around two hours of sleep last night as I wanted to figure out what the problem was and get it repaired. Didn’t I say I have the patience of a saint somewhere, Sophia?

Anyway, I go to the Day Job and guess what, the day off was back on, their fault not mine. I’m ready to attack the day; only there’s no fight, so I come back. One hour later, I’m back in bed asleep with My Dæmon, who is so confused. I am too honestly considering he was to get a nail grind, and I saw his nails afterward. Shouldn’t I be writing a review of PetSmart? I could have taken My Dæmon elsewhere, but I was looking for easy street. I couldn’t even be bothered to write my 5,000 words today because I was conked out. Hell, I have forgotten to read up on; how to jump-start a car battery SIGH. What about texting M Anime I could have at least gotten that done today? Lastly, I signed over my child for “spa treatment.” Well, at least his head isn’t messed up from whatever he was doing outside at some point.

When I was at the Day Job, what did I tell them, “bye” as soon as the opportunity arose? I said goodbye to the sun as soon as it met the sky, and of course, My Dæmon had his walk. There was a see you later to any common sense when my head hit the pillow. I am grateful, though. Everything began working again. Well, not me, I mean, at least I’m not in bed tonight, typing away. There are even more positive vibes because I can post this on Facebook. Of course, I can’t tell you the mailing list I signed up for, though. Will tomorrow be any better Lady Sophia, I have plenty of writing to do tonight.

What’s a decent night’s sleep cost; Will “Byes” A Day.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 133 ~Rage Can Kill, But Who~

I wrote a poem about RAGE once, but I think 28 Days Later, and the sequel said it so much the better than I ever could, but what I wouldn’t give for a beautiful apocalypse or how about the ability to utter NO. “Rage Can Kill, But Who?”

Monday, November 11, 2019

Log 133 ~Rage Can Kill, But Who~

Hundred And Tenth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and is this the way wrong rule for today? Hell, I’m tempted to say it’s the perfect rule for today, that, of course, disqualifies me from posting some places. Even at this moment in time, I’m mad as Hell, and I know I’m going to be exhausted in the morning. Not because I’m letting NaNoWriMo down, I kicked ass there (LANGUAGE). Would I do better to list all the things I’m not mad at tonight? My dæmon, how about my work ethic, and not you Madam Justice.

First and foremost, I hate my Day Job, with the heat from a thousand suns. You wonder why I’m not published yet because that work is burning all the pages. Do I talk about how the Truck can be overwhelming, or more to the point those damn people (LANGUAGE)? What about the shower this morning? The things I come up with, and it wasn’t like I was even remotely horny. No, I made a conscious decision. I swear that scene from a particular anime movie I won’t name. Yeah, people already think I’m a psycho or worse. Cherry might like it, though. Speaking of which, FEAR, Madam Justice. I can’t talk to specific people because of such terror. I didn’t say what needed to be said at work today. NaNoWriMo is being held up because of the FEAR of losing my position, and you know I need the money now.

I can quote Yoda, you know, fear, anger, hate, suffering, but who am I hurting? You see what time it is, but I’m still up because I’m a man of my word. Okay, so I’m a clown now too because I can’t that with a straight face. Can I tell you all the stuff I wanted to say to my boss; how many times would I have to call myself out on language. Don’t even get me started on other employees. I want the world to go away, but again I’m not crazy or suicidal. Well, if I keep having nights like this, I won’t have to worry about it. I’ll drop dead. So I can’t indulge in my self-help phase. I haven’t gotten to play Far Cry 5 or Fallout 4 any and what about the state of the real country, no politics today. It’s Veterans Day; I’m Grateful.

Rage Can Kill But Who?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 130 ~Willingly Writing Z Day~

Great day of writing, but I got it done though at the moment I feel like something akin to the walking dead, and how dare I besmirch their name or even that of Z Nation with my novel. “Willingly Writing Z Day.”

Friday, November 8, 2019

Log 130 ~Willingly Writing Z Day~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now and winning NaNoWriMo. One day I have to get over what it’s like to sound positive about myself. Well, I wasted two days WHEW now that feels much better to say, but still, it’s unhealthy. Now, this is a good question, is anything I write healthy. I could go on and on about all the guys that got laid with my work. Okay, that should have been yesterday, but of course, you know what I did write about SIGH. You don’t, okay, well, that answers why I’m not published yet. Only let me be positive; the next chapter will be this, Knowledge Of Knockouts and Knockers.

Hell, if a specific website had its way, along with a particular model, I’m into the small ones. Let me count all the ways things get taken out of context these days. For example, “THEY” talk about trickle-down economics. The problem is wealthy people never know satisfaction. Earlier this very morning, I was listening to one of my motivations. So it says you have to fill your cup up first with the positive. How many times am I going to use the word “positive?” The same number of times I’ll say the title, The “Wrist” of Playing Chronos, right? I’m still on the idea of using the letters of the alphabet. So far, I’ve burned through B T H C G and I, so not much progress from last week. I got to keep telling myself, again, I’m okay, but I could be at least 16,000 words in if I hadn’t wasted those two days.

Okay, so what have we discovered so far? The “Wrist” of Playing Chronos is about a watch called “The Question Of Chronos,” one of The Thirteen Tools of the Gods. It follows the protagonist as he attempts to protect it from everyone and how best to use its powers. What powers do you ask; can you keep a secret? I said before that no one is reading this, but again who knows. Only that reminds me of Norton. Well, if you remember last week I was a nervous wreck. Now with the end of this week, there has only been one bout of weirdness but no warning emails as far as I know. Still, I rather talk about my story when I should be writing.

There’s no sex or zombies but Willingly Writing Z Day.

I Will Have No Fear