Episode 310 ~Will’s Mr. Big Stuff~

“A big dog, a boss hog, what I want is the question,” and the song answers that too “I Want It All,” what did you expect me to do the song Mr. Big Stuff, I’m not that old, but I’ll find aging in luxury with a beautiful wife. Will’s Mr. Big Stuff

Tuesday, May 7, 2019

Episode 310 ~Will’s Mr. Big Stuff~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now. No multimillionaire, not enough, billionaire, how about a trillion? Now didn’t Forrest Gump say something directly about he wasn’t that smart, but he knows what love is? You won’t like me saying this baby girl. I always told myself when I chose a woman to be with, forever, I wanted a girl so beautiful that I didn’t want to um? That’s a conversation for another time and not that we haven’t.

I think they’re bigger, I would know it. I want to be that kind of daddy, on top of running all the businesses I do. Also knowing I will keep some of it away from our children. I intend to be there to watch them grow up. When they smile, I want to know how they can be happier. They laugh we need more of it. While it doesn’t need to be said but they’ll be no bribes to college. They are going to know they’re smart enough; they’re the best. Okay, do the opposite of everything my “father” did but yes providing for them. They want to sword fight, I love Star Wars, and I’m getting into Game Of Thrones. They want to play the guitar; they get lessons. Swimming’s a must because hell something as vast as the ocean terrifies me; Poseidon anyone?

It’s bigger because my love for you is so great. We’re going to need the space for everything else. It’s no secret even with lifestyles of the rich and famous I want the world to go away. My movie theater; everything delivered, personal on-call vet for B III right? Am I still so afraid you’ll leave me? Do I not want you to escape? Mr. Grey will see you now. The fact that you haven’t run for the hills yet is promising. It could be with all this space I want to shed all my worries. Of course, those should stop at the front door. Am I just a greedy SOB? True enough but the meaning of life to me is simple. Seek Out A Kingdom Worthy Of Your Soul and once upon a time I thought I sold mime.

Big things come in small packages. I knew that when I met my firstborn. When I wrote my first book, bestseller, one million, met you. I love you, and now ha Will’s Mr. Big Stuff.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 303 ~Will There Be Time~

What time is it, I want to jump up for love the way I jumped for the day job this morning, reminded me of being a kid again and having no idea what day it was only believing I was late for school but late for love? “Will There Be Time”

Tuesday, April 30, 2019

Episode 303 ~Will There Be Time~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and still, I don’t know how to love you the right way. People sometimes ask you how you can love me at all. So I ponder the question of, how long is forever? Look at me like I’m some sage philosopher. Anyway, a part of me wants to put some arbitrary timeframe on it, me being me. Hell, it took me twenty seconds of insane courage to talk to you, love.

How fast did I fall in love with my first born? The moment his four paws touched the floor and all I wanted to do is scoop him up. That was fourteen years ago, and to this day I still love him like pancakes. No, a breakfast buffet by now, with a plate full of bacon. Don’t ask. I love you like I’m one of the androids, from Detroit: Become Human. I’m in my mind palace examining every possible angle but time keeps moving. So how do I look standing there? My love for you is like me singing at the FORMER day job. Scratchy, stretched, and long periods of silence. Only the idea that I am capable of doing that and not caring what anyone thinks ever again love.

Hell, I want a love strong enough to stand. Observant and reasonable to understand and silent enough to listen. Our daughters have those qualities, but dad is still well dad. There will come a day when I will have to be the man I need to be. I was so when I published my first book, and I want to love you like that. When time ceases to be, and at the same time I still count on forever. I want to love you as I always do on those Saturday mornings. When it’s only us, in bed listening to my Fallout soundtrack. No, I won’t swear by the moon as Juliet once said. I love you with all myself. Only will there ever be a right time my love?

I’m not a Christian man, but somehow I’ll be mistaken. So if loving you is wrong; see even after all this time I love you through music, dreams, books. I follow that word, FOREVER. The thought that I’d never get it right. So with every breath, I choose to try again with you asking myself again Will There Be Time?

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 080 ~Judas Owes Will Silver~

Am I not worthy of the gold, I am but there is so much work, I should probably get into my motivational listening again and fill like a winner or worse the one who is cheating myself out of everything? Judas Owes Will Silver.

Wednesday, September 19, 2018

Episode 080 ~Judas Owes Will Silver~

Forgive Me Echo,
How to make One Million Dollars out of silver and I did attempt to look that up, and then I got somewhat depressed, but you would figure this is something I should know considering I’m always second place. Not a current sin Inspector Echo, back when I was in middle school, I had this “friend” a football jock, son of a preacher man, black kid, and we would always play Mario Kart… he would win consistently or would I let him win?

“Okay,” asked me once do I fear success and when it comes to my writing or getting her into bed the answer is no, I’m lazy pretty much, considering we’re talking now and not two and a half hours ago. I was playing The Walking Dead No Man’s Land, and it’s all about getting more stars than the other guy, I wish I had such a killer instinct a long time ago because I’m grinding wanting to win. My biggest sin though today and perhaps this whole week, hell a few months is why am I not “trying” harder, how I hate that word, and I’m not going to go all Star Wars right now.

You see the person I am guilty of betraying here is myself; I won’t go all religious either since I never swore allegiance to any god… okay, once but I worked in a Christian bookstore and went through a good book phase. I mostly settle for second circle sins (guess I am going a bit religious) LUST for those paying attention and I end up committing ninth circle atrocities, that’s TREACHERY, can you tell I lived in an AME household? Now I could talk about SLOTH which is one of the seven deadly sins but honestly, there was a sin with silver that frankly shows the beast I am, most of my best work this week is slain by it.

Should I be more specific… I could but I won’t which again shows my shame so if I’m adding them all up, the willingness to remain second because of friends, laziness, and indeed lust as well, at least Judas got paid to betray the son of God. May you forgive me my Inspector Echo, for being weighed down my thirty pieces of silver, well one hundred and ten if you count the downloads Monday, and still I want more but you only get that by striving to be no.1, but *sigh* Judas Owes Will Silver.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 043 ~Losers Always Try Their Best~

Last week I asked, can I do better, and this week as the song goes, you’re the best around, or maybe I would be if I ever got out of bed and started walking the Earth, but in doing what I consider my best… Losers Always Try Their Best.

Monday, August 13, 2018

Episode 043 ~Losers Always Try Their Best~

Forty-Fifth Rule Madam Justice

Give Me One Reason I’m up so early, and it’s because I’m tired of being a loser, yeah that makes perfect sense, or it sucks to tear myself apart, much like this rule, but now I’m not doing my best, I’m doing me. Screwing myself over so one day; well that’s honestly Dirty Diana’s department right but anyway what exactly is my best because whatever it was, well I wanted more and so here I am becoming so damn demanding.

“Your “best”! Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.” ― The Rock (1996)

So you might be able to tell what the forty-sixth rule will be but for now, let’s start with something even more apparent, here I am “home,’ and I don’t see the prom queen anywhere, and for the record the Prom Queen web series (2007) is fantastic. I don’t want to try my best, if I can indeed attest that I ever did, I want to win, no more, no less, as with some of my motivational studies, win at all costs, if I’m going to sleep it might as well be in some king size bed with a pretty girl. I’m grateful for what I have and for the cuddly pup who continues to rest, but I can win for the both of us.

Unconditional love right but I have to find someone. First, I have to Git Up, Git Out, and yesterday was a decent start, though I was late, everything that I made a priority I got done… well not counting PCH but the way to Easy Street means traversing a hard road. Doing is trickier than trying, that would be a new rule if I weren’t sure I have already ripped-off Star Wars at some point, speaking of trying your best with the latest movies, though people are doing that. You know I’ve learned to hate the word “try” because what has it ever gotten me, I tried to get the job and I did, I try to sleep, and I do, it gets me survival but to DO means living.

I’m not the best at anything while I am trying, I’m losing but every day can be a step closer to victory if I do the work, and you know that I don’t mean the day job, and while I’m not the best writer I WILL work harder than whoever that is. Honestly, those speeches must be getting to me because though I am the Cosmic Castaway, for now, it is somehow more than accepting Losers Always Try Their Best.

I Will Have No Fear