Tag: Woman

Episode 023 ~Warmth, Who Is It~

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From blanket to babe, then again neither one of them comes when called, and you can get heated blankets, I wonder if any woman had the hots for me to be sure but as the song goes, I don’t ask for much these days. Warmth, Who Is It

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Episode 023 ~Warmth, Who Is It~

Dear Future Wife,
Give Me One Reason to stay warm, and the simplest would be Baby, It’s Cold Outside and how can that be, it’s not Christmas in July, people usually burn me, and I’ll make sure we’re someplace it’s always warm, I’m not one for Winter or that other season. *Shudders* yet when I gave you my hoody did I have any reason to believe I would never see it again, well I do all the time on you so knowing you’re warm and how hot it makes you look and it’s not like you don’t share it, I feel it when we’re together.

That thought alone warms me, you know they say it takes more muscles to frown than to smile so maybe that’s why I need to do it more often, to feel that burn, the blush on my face though no one ever sees mine, you do it for the both of us. Speaking of things I do for the both of us, I Want To Hold Your Hand you know I’m not one for gloves, and you’ll do pretty much anything to keep me from changing my playlist on the phone. You become my sunshine on my darkest days, yes I know the words My Girl but making you mad at me might be a little too hot if there is ever such a thing.

Of course, you’ve had my cooking, and I’m always looking for the right spice, the secret is ghost pepper sauce, and I’m also trying not to burn the house down while I’m at it of course. So maybe we should stay in bed, some memories, traditions, the Fire And Desire, though I’m still one for Nuclear Pop around the late 30’s to the 50’s and if we’re not listening to music we can lie here and read my latest novel, all about fire. Still, if life insists that I get up, the hottest shower, the cuddliest pup (apologies to my dog) the best cup of hot chocolate, or best alcohol as if I know, doesn’t have anything on your warmth.

Like Linus and his security blanket I grew up and There Goes My Baby, as constant as the sun, so maybe you’ll forgive me for being so thirsty for you and wanting to give you the world. They ask War, what is it good for and you know the answer honestly, absolutely nothing but you my love are everything and the purest definition I know for Warmth, Who Is It.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 016 ~Sorry To Bother You~

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I’m not one for a good pick up line and who knows how her life is going and as the song goes “you make me better” and is that selfish of me, I only want to do the same for her but how will I do that. Sorry To Bother You.

Tuesday, July 17, 2018

Episode 016 ~Sorry To Bother You~

Dear Future Wife,
Give Me One Reason to, well I’m a man, and you’re a woman, seems to me that’s what men are meant to do and how I can picture all the men that might have annoyed you, irritated, or maybe you were downright vexed, but I’m the one you said yes to. Forever and a day, Good Luck because while I don’t believe I snore, you more than anyone will learn how hard I work not to be a bother and you’re Cleopatra, Joan of Arc or Aphrodite?

Yeah, I’m sure, we’ve had this conversation before, I’m not one of those men addicted to his phone, I wouldn’t be so lazy, but I’m going to quote the hell out of movies, shows, music, and authors. I’m going to take so many pictures, so I can give you those Thousand Words that you deserve, and if I have a full-time fan, well you’re already well read, and I’ll Be the greatest fan of your life… would I honestly put that in wedding vows? Singing in the shower lets the dog know I’m safe while he sits outside but I don’t want to wake you since I usually get up early to write, and How Do You Talk To An Angel, big coffee drinker perhaps?

That right there is probably my most annoying habit, not the fact that I don’t drink coffee, I know where Starbucks is, but I am going to ask you are you okay, I’m going to worry, I’ll want to know if there is anything you need; half of that our love life and the other… *ahem* LOVE life. Sometimes I’ll wonder why you aren’t off saving the world, and when you’re reading a book, that’s a sacred time to the both of us, and when this world gets to be too much, I rather we be together but you know I’m about space myself a bit. You might feel it yourself, whenever I’m writing, maybe the dog is reclaiming his place with me, and especially when I’m wearing headphones, turning the world off just saying.

I want you to understand though, no matter what Baby You’re My Light and I don’t mean for only one song, a bad day, and that’s why I guess I get scared because I don’t wish to be one of your problems; I want you always to feel beautiful, to be the one you turn to. Anything to Make You Feel My Love and I’m sorry if I haven’t but like the first day we met, Sorry To Bother You.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 011 ~How Lust Last Forever~

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How old is Barbie, Galatea, or the Mona Lisa, I suppose I could look them up, and if I asked about Stormy Daniels career, I would only be some guy that likes porn, and you wouldn’t ask about the beautiful woman. How Lust Lasts Forever?

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Episode 011 ~How Lust Last Forever~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Give Me One Reason to write about her other than she’s hot, I’ll wait… yeah no one can sit forever, but these words should they ever know a publisher; I don’t want everyone to know how “freaky-deaky” I am, what turns me on as if that’s a secret one can hope. Novel talk might be more of a conversation for Lady Sophia but seeing as how I’ve getting inspired by two porn stars “Stormy Daniels” and “Bryci,” a Cosplayer “Angie Griffin” not to mention an ex-love interest here and there truthfully.

Of course, names are changed and let me say that the library has worked out for me, forces me to keep my hands on my keyboard, and I don’t want to look up porn, I know I have plenty saved up. I also haven’t bothered with being polite like with a love letter, a road I’m Never Going Back Again, because it’s creepy when you know the author, back when I wrote for other people, guys ended up fucking some beautiful girl. Men write songs, produce films like “500 Days of Summer” one of the greatest lessons I ever learned when it comes to writing.

“Well, you know, Henry Miller said the best way to get over a woman is to turn her into literature.”

“That guy had a lot more sex than me.” ― 500 Days of Summer (2009)

One more reason I’m a dominant, I want to make an impression, that I can’t only be some standard dick to ride, that I want a woman to remember, as the song goes “guess it’s true, I’m not good at a one-night stand.” I want a woman to Stay With Me; in a way, they all do to be sure. I can fuck a woman until she can’t walk for a bit. Until she’s speaking so many lies over the phone so she can Stay, and of course scarves and her lingerie are fun to be sure. So when I finally find my forever will I quit writing, of course not, I’m even thinking of ways to incorporate sex with Camp NaNoWriMo other than erotica, if I find YouTube distracting or a blowjob while driving what about while writing novels?

I still remember when getting my porn fix meant praying for HBO, Showtime, Cinemax to show some soft-core or stealing my father’s pornos, and when I first discovered Hentai, now those were some fun times. I have never forgotten that I’m a guy that likes boobs and that girls what, That’s What I Like, breasts, eyes, thighs, though I have my preferences as always though not set in stone but honestly How Lust Lasts Forever?

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 009 ~Peppy Poppy’s Twenty-One Questions~

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As the song goes, I got 21 questions; okay let’s be fair, I’m still working on the number. I tried to ask a girl the 36 Questions To Fall In Love Once, but I’m not much to look at I suppose. “Peppy Poppy’s 21 Questions.”

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Episode 009 ~Peppy Poppy’s Twenty-One Questions~

Dear Future Wife,
Give Me One Reason to not believe you; honesty, loyalty, trust, all side notes in a Crazy Little Thing Called Love because I don’t intend on losing my heart again once you found it, my soul, as beat up and as damaged as it is. Maybe those are my first two questions. You have the heart to look for both, and when you found them, I trust you to take care love.

Don’t worry I’m not jonesing to ask you “21 Questions” I don’t even know what all those questions would entail since I continue to ask you only one and that’s why… what did I say about believing in you? I guess you could ask me the same thing, why should you trust me, being a fiction writer with my ideas, are these my desires, what do I truly believe in, seeing I tossed away faith? It’s Only A Paper Moon, it’s only Lady Luna, another way to live, to see beauty in the darkness, to pay the bills, though that last one was a bit harsh, I suppose people have lied to my face far too often. Writing can be scary, or so I’m told, but that only shows that it’s sincere, and you can believe me when I say writing is what I do. I do it because I love it and I’ll let you know I love you every day, I’ll write it down, and I will show it today, forever and always.

That’s all I Ask Of You, that you do the same, and I’m not asking for a full-blown work of art… am I honestly calling my work that, but that’s something, will you tell me what works and doesn’t, will you tell me if I scared you, will I wake up to I love you? When you walk away and make a promise with a sultry smile can I believe it, when you ask me something do you wish for an honest answer; when you stood by my side, was that forever and a day? How about when you’re peppy can I trust that to be accurate and would you tell me if you were hurt and if I’m in pain how I imagine that you would keep trying even if I were mad, also if I turned you away, still if I said I didn’t believe you baby girl?

“I held him close and said nothing, all the while telling him silently that he was loved. Oh, but he was loved.” — Me Before You

More than anything I want to believe you, I want to believe in you when I don’t even trust myself: you and the dog, and that our children love us, because being with you makes me happy; if I ask you 36 Questions To Fall In Love, Back At One or Peppy Poppy’s 21 Questions.

“I know we can do this. I know it’s not how you would have chosen it, but I know I can make you happy. And all I can say in that you make me… you make me into someone I couldn’t even imagine. You make me happy, even when you’re awful, I would rather be with you – even the you that you seem to think is diminished – than with anyone else in the world.” — Me Before You (2016)

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 004 ~Pin Ups, Falls, Submissions~

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While I never thought about being a wrestler, there was a time I was a big fan, and a part of me still is apparently, but I need more than a picture and more than a thousand words on most days. Pin Ups, Falls, Submissions, distracting.

Thursday, July 5, 2018

Episode 004 ~Pin Ups, Falls, Submissions~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Give Me One Reason to keep liking brunettes, girls with dark hair or crazy bright: Bayley, AJ Lee, Paige, Ronda Rousey, Askua, please stop me before I get into another porn downloading session. Don’t worry I’m still practicing No Fap, Day 117 and counting but it’s hard, it’s stressful, and considering how pissed I’ve been at “people” lately no wonder a girl like Alexa Bliss has caught my eye for the time being; what do they say, blondes have more fun.

Don’t remember the last time that I had fun, being on my back most days which only continues to push me towards the likes of Alexa and I can’t say I usually have a thing for athletic girls, but that’s because I hate most sports and wrestling doesn’t have cheerleaders. Why do I watch some of the Olympics again… though it isn’t cool to think about those Olympians like that with all the scandal only in this day and age it isn’t okay to think of most women like that unless you’re rich, a fellow victim or a convict. Hair color does not make the woman but since high school, I’ve had a type, and I’m starting to think I chose wrong, don’t judge girls by the color of their roots because in the end as the song goes… we’re all the same color when you turn out the lights.

“We’re all the same color when you turn out the lights” Fredro Starr, True Colors

What about words though Dirty Diana, I’m still working on “Apocalypse Rush” (Working Title) and already we’ve had gangbangs, kidnappings, and blood galore, but which do you think will bother people more, words like “cum dumpster,” interracial sex, or redrum? How about the Man In The Mirror, I’m no cover boy, no pin-up, and sadly the content of my novel doesn’t bother me. Instead, it’s the quality and how about the fact I have so many unpublished stories already. I would show you an excerpt, but character names need some alterations, you know inspiration, Angie Griffin, Alexa Bliss, the age-old question of blonde or brunette or redheads “courtwithconfidence” just saying.

I could name more but as they say, a picture is worth a thousand words and truth be told I need around fifteen hundred for my novel today, so this evening hopefully I’ll be facing black and white aplenty and not Pin Ups, Falls, Submissions.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 002 ~Do I Miss Ordinary~

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If the love given to me is ordinary I would instead value weird as everything, love isn’t meant to be ordinary, and if life in misery in ordinary than there is nothing worse, I want a different girl a strange type of woman. “Do I Miss Ordinary.”

Tuesday, July 3, 2018

Episode 002 ~Do I Miss Ordinary~

Dear Future Wife,
Give Me One Reason to, and I would be lying if I said I have known ever fear and have found myself victorious because as much as I promise I’m Never Going Back Again I have days like today where I remember. Did I dare dream that once upon a time you were Just Another girl like the rest of them, you scared me like them, you could have been boring *gasp* and talk about twenty seconds of insane courage, my love.

Ordinary is sitting there watching them laughing at me, girls and maybe one day I’ll grow up and stop calling you all girls, I might not be a scared little boy. If anything I can’t call myself ordinary because you are Extraordinary. You deserve better from me. First I couldn’t look at ordinary anymore, but when it presented itself, with whispers and laughs, I wish I could say I didn’t waste my time, no if I couldn’t tell ordinary, to go to Hell how could I possibly be worthy of someone like you. I know I’m no prince to slay dragons though so many trials and tribulations and when I found you, so much for mediocre, or what was ordinary.

A girl is capable of making a man do the impossible, a good girl, even more, a woman, princess, queen, empress, goddess, shall I continue you made me capable of everything and anything. You made me let go of my hate today, as I said today I saw again who I was so long ago, even now I feel so pathetic and weak, and I didn’t know if my rage would consume me or my tears would drown me but being the person you are… The fact that I can never escape you and you don’t wish to be free from me, if it wasn’t my hate of them it was for myself, god my love for you transcends that of myself, but the fact remains I love myself, and that will never be ordinary.

I’m sure the dog misses his spot… he still gets bed space only a little less thankfully he is small, I miss the day like today where I could scream and yell at someone, I miss hate, I miss indifference, all ordinary and it shouldn’t be, it shouldn’t have been. Ordinary is me being a jester instead of a king; we can’t be ordinary; baby girl this is No Ordinary Love. Do I Miss Ordinary?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 362 ~A Sucker For Pain~

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Yeah, that’s not my size but maybe her, her or perhaps you know her, I can only imagine, I keep bleeding love to tick off to music genres, but I’ve just been ticking off myself lately. “A Sucker For Pain”

Thursday, June 28, 2018

Lesson 362 ~A Sucker For Pain~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,

Can You Love Me Again, even if you’re not a masochist indeed I would prefer if you weren’t though I’m a sadist, if you enjoy the pain then I have no reason to inflict it. How I want to hurt you. I know I’m supposed to be explaining a bit all the reasons I’m a dominant and maybe that will be in the coming year, and I wish I could think of something special for us but Dirty Diana I’m not in the mood at all.

For the longest time, I thought maybe I was a masochist, though I don’t get off on the pain only these days everything hurts, and I don’t know why but my entire life it’s as if I’m asking for more. These days other than the usual porn that I torture myself with because I’m into Day 110 of No Fap, I’ve taken up the habit of wearing a rubber band around my wrist and snapping it every time I do something stupid or let my fear get the better of me. Considering all I know about self-harm I’m pretty damn pathetic, but I need the pain to learn. While I said last week, I want a girl to know how I feel I wouldn’t wish my life or anybody but if I can endure and want to stick around in my skin, if she can take it maybe she’ll want to stick around with me… Psychopath’s Prey wasn’t that bad?

One can’t learn to inflict pain unless one has known it, so I should take pain not as gratification but as a lesson of course, what doesn’t kill you right, though the drawback is plenty of empathy. Another old saying, this is going to hurt me more and it will emotionally, maybe physically, definitely financially but a dominant looks after a submissive and I like my Subs to wear beautiful things, only so I can tear them off later. Hell, it’s killing me that I haven’t gotten “Detroit: Become Human” or a PS4 for that matter, and still, I saw this bikini on “Enchanted Bikinis,” and it would be more than a hundred dollars and no Sub at the moment but “I Always Find A Way.” Where there’s a Will, and I’m still him always.

“My mother named me Victor because she knew I’d always win. I’ll be fine.” Victor Strand, Fear The Walking Dead

Haven’t I said before or thought it up that we’re closest to life when we’re near death or in pain, let’s go with “hurt” and maybe that’s what I need, sexual gratification might knock some out but denial keeps you awake, A Sucker For Pain.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 360 ~A Fool For You~

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Name calling, I’m guilty as charged myself, but I will never be one to prescribe to the old rhyme of sticks and stones; my father had one particular name for me, and I refuse to feel that way, NEVER AGAIN. A Fool For You or someone probably

Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Lesson 360 ~A Fool For You~

Dear Future Wife,
Can You Love Me Again, well if I can make you laugh, I can make you do anything? I’m willing to do almost anything. You heard me right I said almost because I’m not *sigh* stupid. Don’t get me wrong, I’m A Fool For You all men are for their women, we can be idiots, hell I swore I’d figure you out someday, and here I am continuing to wonder Are You Into Me and why.

I’m not a smart man… but I know what love is. ― Forrest Gump (1994)

In high school I took a class in French, the language of love and I never got anywhere with it, I had a hard time just speaking English to you, but I learned, I evolved because the first time I saw you well, my heart skipped a beat, I had to catch my breath and my footsteps… They say silence is golden, but I Can’t Help Falling In Love with you, the way you smiled, how your eyes lit up, the way you touched me, your words, almost every one of them, again almost. Only a fool thinks anyone is perfect and I never asked to be a wise man just your man, and if that makes me a fool, well you laughed right along with me, and that’s enough.

Even though I call myself Le Maquis de Joker I only wanted one person to laugh, maybe a few more with the kids, but I’m not good with dad jokes, neither was my father and that’s the reason I say almost. I Will Do Anything For Love, but I won’t do that, and I don’t mean making jokes. Before I even started talking to girls, I wanted to be a comedian because they made people laugh, and before you ask I still hate clowns but for the kids, for you… I won’t be a joke, I can’t, I won’t ever, I’m no genius, but I refuse to be stupid or even thought of as such, I will not be STUPID for you ever; I can take a joke, but I will never be a joke in my home NEVER AGAIN.

“Heh… C’mon, Leslie… can’t you take a joke?”

Leslie Zevo: “Oh yeah! I love jokes! I love all kinds of jokes. But you know what I don’t like? I don’t like people trying to kill me, hurting my family and my friends, and destroying the whole world as I know it. That just doesn’t sit well with me.” ― Toys

Call me whatever you want, your husband, lover, Will, you don’t even have to talk to me at all because you know there are days when there are no words but if there is one I will not stand for, that I refuse to feel it’s stupid, never but always love A Fool For You.

Matchbox Twenty ― Mad Season

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 355 ~Give A Lit Bit~

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Domination 101, how much do I know and what do I believe, this might be an ongoing series considering it has nearly been a year, hell might be a book idea, but I’m talking to the wrong woman, all of them in fact. Give A Little Bit

Thursday, June 21, 2018

Lesson 355 ~Give A Lit Bit~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again after I tell you why I’m a dominant and not like Christian Grey though I am a sadist, I like hurting brunettes, but I love my mother very much and the black women I do like… Zoë Kravitz, Alicia Keys, and Amandla Stenberg before she shaved her head to name a few. Yes, I want the pain, the humiliation, anger, fight, and submission, and the ironic thing is I would never do this to the everyday person, while I loathe humanity my aunt was right and wrong about me destroying the world, that’s just dumb Diana.

Already this is more than I have time for, but unlike lovemaking, I will try and be brief and let me start there, the world has taken so much, I ration myself, I rip myself into pieces and then try to hold it together, to be an Ordinary Human. I have felt all of the above, pain and the like and while Yoda famously said fear leads to anger it can also lead to courage and with it power and where would you want that power to go… vengeance? A person wants to fight, and they say, “you want a piece of me” now not every girl I lay eyes on is love but rather “a viable romantic partner,” and she deserves far more. Indeed it demands my all, and so a submissive gives so must a dominant like me.

Why do I attract the broken and the dirty, because I see and as much as I hate this word “potential” I don’t want to change them but build them up, girls will tell you, I learn all about them, feed them, comfort them and at the same time I want the Madonna and the Whore. I’m sure Sigmund Freud, would have something to say about that but I also mentioned anger, and no I have never abused a woman, and maybe this is fucked up, but I want a woman to know exactly how I feel, the power over oneself finally taken and made desirable. I often say I want a girl that would make an incredible zombie apocalypse partner, a warrior and someone like that must know all of me, the Negan and King Ezekiel, the North to my Markus (Detroit: Become Human, my obsession), the Belle to my Beast, all that I am is yours even If Only For One Night honestly.

This is only the tip of who I am I mean, why am I into an innocent “youthful” look, why do I prefer silk, ribbons, sheets and using clothes rather than leather, ropes, and traditional restraints but I am a dominant because a girl deserves more but why with the world as a whole do I Give A Little Bit.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 353 ~Caged Hearts, Wander Away~

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My heart has a cage, and yet the love I feel is allowed to travel, and so I am not a prisoner, I am free to know what love is or at the moment empathy, even my dog is in a cage, but he went potty on the floor. Caged Hearts, Wander Away

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Lesson 353 ~Caged Hearts, Wander Away~

Dear Future Wife,
Can You Love Me Again, I find love is not some finite resource, between me, and all the kids, including the four-legged one, you wonder why I want to make even more sooner or later my love. Speaking of which, where are the ones we got, I never pictured myself a helicopter parent or someone to relate to Trump but that’s why I have my first born Chihuahua outside surrounded by a high fence, I have to keep an eye on him and even you I believe.

Not in a Christian Grey sort of way; I trust you, and I love us, and I love my dog like pancakes, and as for our other kids, I love them like; hell, how can something so small create a love so gigantic? If only more people were like us, the idea of bringing life into this world of nourishing it, terrifies me because of the people out there and the people we become, it hurts me to lock up my furry friend how would I ground someone? As long as I don’t become a man like Trump or my father, heartless, thinking I can throw money at anything, favoring one life over another, violence *shudders* I want them to feel loved, proud, Live Brave.

“If I had just one wish
Only one demand
I hope he’s not like me
I hope he understands
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open.”
With Arms Wide Open

Sad that I look at my adopted son and see that he has become so much like me, so full of fear, anger, and hate, he doesn’t even like Star Wars, you do know I’m introducing Luke and Leia right… kidding Katniss, Tris, Ember, Lena, Bella, I could go on, and as far as boys, not Will, that tradition dies with my father. I want to introduce our children to a world full of hope, a place where they can choose because if we must decide for them or control them, then we have failed, they won’t go breaking statues or messing with gorillas. Everyone knows what I would do if someone harmed my first, may God have mercy on any who have no regard for what’s mine no matter the number of legs… as I said the things, we can become with such love.

Forever and always I want us to be a family, Mommy and Daddy, all the kids, nobody has a right to take that away from us no matter where we are as long as we love one another. I see so many parents alone or even losing their kids; I wouldn’t mind losing ours for a bit, because we’ll always be husband and wife as well; Caged Hearts, Wander Away.

Close Your Eyes And Wander

I Will Have No Fear