Gospel 247 ~Thinking Outside The Braxton~

Think outside the box. There was a time that I wanted to be a veterinarian. Don’t care for people, but I love dogs. Not the one in Duck Hunt. Braxton watched me play games, watch movies, but I never saw myself save him. “Thinking Outside The Braxton”

Friday, March 5, 2021

Gospel 247 ~Thinking Outside The Braxton~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so maybe I’ll buy the first machine that tells me what dogs think. What Braxton thinks

Like Father, Like Son, so that would be a waste of money. He likes to walk around the block. A black man with his Mexican kid. Now is there a more sensible way to say that? Well, as the song goes AHEM, “First let me explain I’m just a black man” okay, he’s a Chihuahua. My favorite place is in bed, and he was under it. I’ll hide under the covers from who knows what, and he hid underneath. No, I think I got the know. We don’t like people, Sophia. Dead people… When I would babysit him back when he belonged to my sister, he was a Disney fan. My sister hated what I would watch, but my “father” actually chewed her out. Surprise

She wasn’t training him, so for hours, I would watch for his bathroom time. You know TWD is back, so how was my first Sunday without him? Say it with me, Lady Sophia, “I cried.” One more thing I need to give up. Um, I’m trying chocolate, onion rings, breathing. How about some happiness? I still won’t say it, but the best of times was when Braxton was boxed in between Indiana Gone and I.

Movie Nights, and for a few hours, Braxton had a family. I was glad, and he was happy. If I could get out of my own head like my little boy. If he weren’t thinking about me, it’s “what’s in that cold box?” “Why are you in the water room?”

I should give B III way more credit. How many times have I asked why didn’t he like the car? Um, it never went well for him. The vet, the groomers, even if it was a new place to walk, we’d have to come home. “It’s too hot,” or “don’t leave me, Dad.” As always. But sitting on that bench when he was taken from me and was returned. I swear I’ve never thought of this house as a home. Happiness, home, have a heart, that was all my Braxton. A gift I saw wiggling one day in my father’s hands given to someone else. Braxton chose me, lived in this house, died in my arms. Now he’s in a box. Thinking Outside The Braxton.

I Am Afraid Without Braxton

Log 178 ~Will Outside The Box~

Thursday still isn’t so much fun, and yes, it’s still Wednesday as I’m writing this. A day without writing is like a day without sunshine, or should I say Santa; I haven’t seen him around and how come. “Will Outside The Box.”

Thursday, December 26, 2019

Log 178 ~Will Outside The Box~


Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and what do I do with all that money? He only plays with the box THEY say. Okay, Diana, I’ll admit, even I’m iffy about today’s subject matter. Yes, it’s still Christmas Day, but what would Scrooge be doing other than working. Well, writing is hard, but it’s not a “job.” I’m also downloading a Christmas Porno “A Christmas Wish For Whitney,” from BABES. Somebody called it a Hallmark Movie with less clothing. Of course, Santa didn’t bring me anything I wanted this year, yeah I didn’t send a list.

Now, of course, getting to my list, Frapping, check, need to finish reading Snow Angel. I did start my review of Raphael. Reading, reviewing, reveling in writing it are all different things. Last night I didn’t wake up at 1:30 in the morning because you know I was still up. The day before, I needed Brooke Logan “Adult Supervision Required” to stay awake. The things that keep us up from the past to the future. I haven’t even watched anything dealing with Christmas unless it was porn. You might be “happy” to know that I took a casual glance at the satellite today. Katniss Everdeen, Bella Swan, talk about girls I wouldn’t mind seeing under my tree. No, Dirty Diana, I did not buy a tree or even mistletoe SIGH.

Where I lay, my head is a box. I have all the peace and quiet you could ever ask for and more. Yes, I am blessed as my motivations would go, but I have been listening to Christmas music a bit. Only again, that’s between all of the porn, but what else did I get myself for Christmas. A good breakfast, some cupcakes, time to handle stuff early. When I’m not looking at Brooke, Tia Tanaka, Alyssa Hart, I could go on forever. Still, the end of the decade is coming, and it’s Christmas Day. I should do myself a favor and keep it in my pants, don’t you think. How about cleaning the house some more or finishing my book review? I could finish “GULP” now wouldn’t that be something. None of these things sound so sexy, though, and the weather is hot enough.

If only there were a box big enough for all my porn, if I had a pretty girl, think Will, honestly Will Outside The Box.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 123 ~Going Around In Circles~

Why I don’t watch NASCAR, I suppose I like to see a clear ending, going around in a circle only to celebrate by doing it again, a victory lap and then again just sitting here *sigh*. Going Around In Circles, the world is round OH how I know that

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Lesson 123 ~Going Around In Circles~

Forgive Me Echo,
No Fear of me dying today at least maybe I could use as I said, a lot of forgiveness as always, today it would be for my old car, the fact that I have probably told this story a few times, my smile, and the fact that NaNoWriMo starts today and what the hell am I going to do about it now?

So that we never forget, maybe I was lazy, maybe I was being a Scrooge, maybe I just hated myself so much but some years back my brakes failed… as I knew they would and I crashed back into a tree. A full circle and I didn’t hit anything but that tree, why I’m grateful for my morning shift; isn’t that something grateful to still have a job but not to be alive, my priorities.

Speaking of work and last night being Halloween, I wish I could take off this mask I call a smile, a fucked up smile at that or at least make it do a 180. How about finding the last thing that made me go “OH” or maybe the last good thing, life seems to be a circle of the bad, like the song goes, Every Day Is Exactly The Same.

That’s probably why I keep telling the same stories, stuck in the past, those that don’t learn from history and what not and tell me what the future has ever offered me. Yes Inspector Echo I’m complicit in my own murder every day or like “Morgan” from The Walking Dead, I don’t die, worse I could be a walker *sigh*.

Yet another reason I’m probably not participating in NaNoWriMo; is my creativity dead or again I’m just being lazy, even now I’m in bed and today I got the chance to leave early and I didn’t think twice. If only my past could be like that but it all comes around again or maybe I should think outside the box.

My greatest sin of all but if I talked about that thing, that thing, that thing” Doo Wop from Lauryn Hill; I swear my sins are like all my other chores sometimes.

So I am sorry Inspector Echo, for not caring enough to have the car fixed, for being stuck, for being a liar by omission and somewhat of a lazy ass but I’ll apologize some more because as we know, Going Around In Circles.

I Will Have No Fear

Grisly Load – A Process

Life for want of a box; seems somewhat ironic that I am surrounded by boxes at work and no I don’t work at a funeral parlor; I work at hmm… Grisly Load – A Process… most days I empty boxes of crap and all I want to do is curl up in one and die.

The box awaits its grisly load
Should I be food for worms?
Or let it burn
A prince, no I’m a toad
Because I’m all alone
How I continue to turn
Will I never learn?
Can I never fold?

And end this ridiculous game
Take my cards
Break my heart
For I am too ashamed
To live within this box
I just want it to STOP!!!

Copyright © 2011, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.