Gospel 033 ~Women Always Find The Truth~

If I lie, she’ll make things up, if I’m honest, she’ll think I’m a million times worse, so yeah, I’m lying. Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day, as THEY say, that wouldn’t be a lie, but wouldn’t I still be hiding facts? Women Always Find The Truth

Monday, August 3, 2020

Gospel 033 ~Women Always Find The Truth~

Hundred And Forty-Eight Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, or I better be if I don’t intend to live mine alone. Does that sound like I don’t have a high opinion of women? Madam Justice, I pay them the highest ideal of all, I tell them the TRUTH. Now, why hasn’t LIE made it to my Most Hated Words list? I know the value of lies, yes. I lie to save my behind. So I’ll lie at the Day Job, to my “father” and even to myself. Hell, I even lie to my Dæmon. He got me singing, “I know, I know, I know.” Like any woman, though, he knows the truth of what I am.

For the longest time, I figured I was scared of women but not for the reason that they may think. I’m shy, I’m an introvert, I suffer from Social Anxiety, take your pick. You want the truth, how about another song, “Everybody knows I’m a motherfucking monster.” Pardon my language Madam Justice, but again I’m only being honest. I can go all-in on a guy only wanting one thing, and that’s true enough. I believe in the primal instinct. On the basic level, men and women come together for one thing, and everything else is born of that, not only children. Only people pretend everything else and for what, to deny themselves? I have seen it firsthand. My words in the hands of someone else and as fast as you can say Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off. So why would I waste time lying?

I respect a woman for her intelligence… at least I try. I’m still thinking about that video I watched on being CREEPY. So I’m supposed to lie my entire life, never take a free breath, be trapped because of the concept of nature vs. nurture? I always take responsibility, but I would work for all the money in the world than kill myself off. I’m not suicidal, but anytime I felt that way, it’s been because of other people. You can’t tell a woman that right off the bat. Neither can I tell her everything I want to do to her. The idea though that I want to fuck her, well, she knows. More to me lies (sigh) Undiscovered. And I know I sound like one of those women-hating freaks, but I love women, and Women Always Find The Truth.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 365 ~You Gain Respect Through Actions~

Two years of blogging every single day, how’s that for commitment, but most of the things I write and the things I do on the daily; I know honestly I don’t have many people’s respect for sure. You Gain Respect Through Actions

Monday, July 1, 2019

Episode 365 ~You Gain Respect Through Actions~

Ninety-First Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and I have two years of blogging in the bag, so congratulations are in order. Today is also day damn one of Camp NaNoWriMo, and I have 1700 words down so far. I’m not keeping all of my commitments, but I have had more wins than losses, that’s enough. I didn’t go off on people at the Day Job. Somehow or another, I helped someone. Now while I hate the state of politics, it did help me talk to a “pretty” girl. I’m more into boobs, but butts are a close second Madam Justice.

Did I lose your respect, talk politics you’re right but getting in someone’s pants? Being real dear Madam Justice, I can’t say most of my actions are respectable. I’m still not waking up on time; I’m late with the writing and the reading. The thing is I said I would start NaNoWriMo and I got that done, and a woman doesn’t take me for an idiot. Well, one because if you knew the things I’ve been thinking about MILF Dos lately? Am I lying to Brainbuddy as well? It’s not like I’m going to XVideos, Pornhub, or Motherless. I have seen more boobs than I care to admit to and hell, I’m writing erotica again what did you expect. If anything, I want to gain credibility with myself and with my last story and this one? I AM committed to writing you know Madam Justice.

Nobody at the Day Job respects me, but I’m not giving them any reason to either. The problem is the actions; I don’t want to be the hardest worker in the room at the Day Job. Now I do want to be a hell of a writer and counting the blog I write four books a year. It could be as I said I want to respect myself. I would even say I want B III to see me as somebody. For now, I’m only a tired meanie who is not looking up actual porn. How about the fact that the people I surround myself with, well it wouldn’t mean anything if I had their respect. The businesses I dream of running aren’t what they call respectable. My actions though, trusting myself. Working as I did today, every second, I resist temptation. I know Madam Justice; I have to sigh You Gain Respect Through Actions.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 223 ~Stand At Attention Will~

Honestly, I did not think I was going here today, more like little head instead of the big head, but what about a furry one, I should go to “PetSmart” more on Sundays no doubt, but I have my son, and I stand by him. Stand At Attention Will.

Saturday, February 9, 2019

Episode 223 ~Stand At Attention Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, become the Secretary of Defense; believe it or not, there was a time in my life Lady Lu that I said those words out loud, I also wanted to be a war correspondent and as you recall I did a brief stint in the Navy. The words are Military Bearing; do you know why I tend to make all these “personalities” female save for one; I don’t think in my life there has been one man in my environment that I have honestly respected, on a personal level I will say.

Today I was at PetSmart picking up B III’s meds, and they had an adoption thing, and I saw the cutest little dog; this furbaby was a few inches taller than my son. Oh to let dear Trible B have a few years taken back on him, return to puppy form I’d give him a sibling. My father never taught me about how to be a man, he threatened to kill me before going into the military, I thought maybe they would educate me, but I left, one uncle cheated on his wife, another married in and murdered my mom’s sister. Never met my great grandfather’s, paternal granddad wasn’t there, maternal grandfather got divorced, another uncle shot and can’t stand, one more not indeed an uncle, don’t know him, or my older half-brother, “father” beat my mother too you know.

Okay so back to B III and as I stood there, a bag full of over a hundred pills, over three months that I wouldn’t hesitate to buy again and I saw this other dog that needs a home, a family and if my little one wasn’t so old, ornery, and obstinate… Anyway so I’m driving, and I’m listening to my motivations, talking about not letting the past control you and I think of how I am and my son and our future, and there it is his obituary coming to mind. Everything I want to say to him, that it has been my honor and privilege to be his father, that if I have a chance in Hell of getting to Heaven, it will be but a word from him, and that I’m sorry I failed him. No mother, no two-legged siblings to protect, I didn’t give him the home that he ever deserved.

I’ve said before I owe Will Smith my life and as far as my “father” a man must look after his family but it was my little boy, who is a greater man than I could have possibly hoped to raise, who taught me about love, life, even lungs as I watch him breathe and I can. I love him like pancakes I always say because I couldn’t love him more if I poured the “Bisquick” and we have walked together, fought, lived and if there is any man I honestly do respect and would follow it’s my son, pathetic huh but not father, flag, or female has gotten so much; Stand At Attention Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 195 ~So Fear The Willing~

The only person that should scare me is me and for once maybe not in the usual way, not that I have ever feared failure or success, I would be a monster, and currently, I’m The Walking Dead. So Fear The Willing

Saturday, January 12, 2019

Episode 195 ~So Fear The Willing~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, Dennis Hof did it, Donald Trump, hell someone even said let’s put sharks in a tornado; if those that they call out for their Depravity, a man that should be despised, something that sounds so dumb can make it? Don’t let me down, that’s what I need to say to the man in the mirror, my son who was crying in my arms, and who I want to become by September, if only I am willing to get there, I’m up.

At 2:15 AM for maybe the past week I have been up, my schedule at the Day Job and I rise, and how many times have I mentioned the “MILFS “well one in particular, I swear that never gets old… Aren’t we all though, which again makes me look at B III, he’s going to be fourteen, and that would put him around seventy-two; the stories he could tell and still that is up to me; seems that is becoming my new mantra. All this week it was, staying positive, the rising cost of living, and again staying awake, and what have I done with all that time, in words, books, savings, forming good habits.

Would you call breathing a habit? They say it’s not the breaths you take but the moments you go without it; now you know I’m a fan of The Walking Dead, which is how I feel but I say fear those who are willing to chase angels, why I’ll tell you honestly. There’s another assertion about the most dangerous of creations be it the man with nothing to lose or the (father) defending his young and aren’t I both? No one Lady Lu despite what pleasures get them there walks into Hell with a smile on their face but when one can walk out with one, and now that’s not always the case I know but Way Down Human Goes.

Nearly all my Motivations point out that it’s those that fall and are willing to get up, those who can go over the other guy (no matter how you look at it) and those that would die to win will. Iron Will, Force Of, 15% Concentrated, yesterday I said I didn’t want to be ashamed of my name, I wrote a whole piece once “Lesson 56 Respect On My Name” but maybe today I only want to remind myself of the man I could be NOW, So Fear The Willing.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To think I can go anywhere I want, and I would prefer to stay in bed instead of putting these hands to work but I did take a step in the right direction, and maybe I can make another one this week. “Will Take The Wheel.”

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, coming from someone with a “history” of numbers that’s rich; no pun intended or maybe it is because if it’s not the 1, 2, 3’s it’s A, B, C, and of all the words not to like, DISCOMBOBULATED looks good on you. Well I mean if this is what gets you up in the morning, though you could have gotten up earlier… one of these days will be a positive one, maybe that should be on the list, like a million dollars.

Even now you want to complain about tomorrow and the day after, what about the next, and you’re looking for that silver lining, but it always comes back to the numbers, the two movies you want to see against how much you worked last week for example. The gas in your car, plus the two wheels that need replacing, and the money in your wallet and every excuse that I want to throw at you currently; If I Were A Rich Man. Complaining about cash is a big sign of adulting, especially in America, when your only concern becomes about money and how I wish for you that it overwhelms even your lust; because words are going to make you money I believe and that means more days fighting against “other passions” Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Completed
4. I Will Eat Breakfast Every Day
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Church.” By Stylo Fantome
Completed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

Well look at that, I said positive, and already last week I broke 17.5 to a solid 34 F one foot in front of the other, but you have to move faster, not quite as “quickly” as you Fapping nowadays ha, but again you need the car. Hell, the words should be even harder considering the tragedies besetting you from all sides, but you will no longer apologize for things that you aren’t responsible for to anybody and no that doesn’t go on the list. This week you might even get three things done, even if the book; yeah more negativity, no state the facts the erotica book club wanted to read another m/m and a long one at that, did I say that… words; but these Six Impossible Things.
1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Again other things should make this list but the point is to maintain control of yourself but you must also know when to let loose like I didn’t, I want people in the ground and yet I remained silent because the lady at work lost her husband. Respect right, but who respects you, such a concept comes from those that find themselves in; no, those who seize control and that is what you must do so Will Take The Wheel.

I Will Have No Fear