Tag: Future

Lesson 363 ~I Hate This Part~

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A few hours to kill, not to mention some characters, a blank screen, okay so write, only I wish that it would work that way and even then I wouldn’t be able to edit to save my life I bet. I Hate This Part.

Friday, June 29, 2018

Lesson 363 ~I Hate This Part~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Can You Love Me Again, that’s only one of the parts I hate, the waiting, craving, and even with all that not saying things right or wasting more time for mediocre work which I would never know because of editing… I saw last night that I am ill prepared for another stint of NaNoWriMo and then again I’m going to give it a real “can do”; isn’t that another thing hating a word like try, “interesting,” and stupid, still irked by that.

“Yes, no, maybe
I don’t know
Can you repeat the question?”
― Boss Of Me

What about “miracle” that’s a word that isn’t going to happen for me, no I take that back, if anything people have only been spelling the word wrong, you want a miracle, no Lady Sophia you want to work. Regret is another nasty word because that’s something else I’ve been feeling, I’ve had a whole year, and what do I have to show for it, a blog, two books maybe three if you count the poetry hell perhaps even four if you count every blog post. So which is harder, waiting for PCH and yes I’m ashamed to admit I checked them out today, they aren’t coming here, what about waiting for inspiration which I’ve been thinking about, or I could be looking up how you know you’ve got bit by something, me, the dog?

How many words is that (Stupid, Try, Miracle, Work, Regret, Shame, Waiting) seven deadly sins but there is also the capacity for good as in Work, and that’s what I should be doing, what I need to do versus what I want? I don’t think it’s God that gives us the strength if I need more imaginary friends there are so many characters dying for me to let them come out and play. Maybe that’s one of the most hateful parts Lady Sophia, that you have to live to feel all of this and if you’re living, I think you have a responsibility, god how I hate people sometimes but if you’re going to take up air and space, you need to do something right.

Procrastination is the part I hate the most though, living like this, feeling like this and yes I am blessed, I am grateful, but that doesn’t make the pain go away, even being at the finish line because now what is the question. Writing has always been the answer, but I long for the day my hands find enjoyment in other things but for now one day I love this, another I hate it, and now I Hate This Part.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 356 ~Words You Can Bank~

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You can’t get rid of words, while money is another story there are always more words to say and for me always more words to write even with my anniversary coming up, a whole year of things I shouldn’t speak, how about The End? Words You Can Bank

Friday, June 22, 2018

Lesson 356 ~Words You Can Bank~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Can You Love Me Again, how about next year, maybe in July, hell how about “tomorrow,” another one of my favorite words going with “someday” and “discombobulated,” they aren’t getting me anywhere, but they feel great to say? Well more to the point write and in a week I will have been doing it for a year, talk about passion, desire, stupidity and everything else, and I wonder why I write as always, but words make me feel good, why writing’s HARD.

For example “Okay” doesn’t like nasty names and at the same time words like, beautiful or sexy get me nowhere, but it all starts with knowing their name and wasn’t the point of all this for people to know my name? “Block and Report” are two more of my favorites, or maybe I have gullible written on my forehead, but then I wouldn’t have to do so much for my protection. Now that might be something will talk about next week, why I got into this blog but that’s more words that make me feel bad, but the one I have been attempting to take back is my name, so yes my name is Will.

Writing that complaint against Church’s Chicken today while a waste of time was pretty good, Subway threw in a couple of sandwiches and how I hate looking at receipts nowadays. How about the feeling I’ll get if I ever see my name in something published, I found some of my old books, and there was a bit of pride, like seeing your name on a paycheck before you realize how many bills you have to pay. I think one thing that has been consistent these months is I Will Have No Fear; it’s not helping.

The dog’s barks do more for me to be honest and while annoying as Hell, it means, he’s still alive, and he’s keeping me alive but my problem is so many people waste air on words, and there is one more reason I’m a writer. Don’t you remember what it felt like when people use to text, the same with email most days it’s only more words, and I want my words to mean something?

The more words I write or I should say published will give me more time to think of sequels, but for now, the best words in all of writing history that bring me joy and make me feel the best about my writing are The End, Words You Can Bank.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 349 ~There Are Better Stories~

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Everybody has a story but how many stories are people telling, how many of those stories are being believed, how many of those stories are living and breathing, though to live one of my stories; I know I’ll do better. “There Are Better Stories.”

Friday, June 15, 2018

Lesson 349 ~There Are Better Stories~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Can You Love Me Again, once I tell you that I can write better stories, I believe I can, I know I can and excuse me if I sound like “Mr. Motivation” here, but there is always another way to hear stories of another’s success. You heard me right Lady Sophia, stories, not that I’m getting into audiobooks, remember “The Scarlet Letter” if you could stay awake for that one you passed the test but never again.

“Sleep is the new broke.” ― Eric Thomas, on sleep

You know how I feel about sleep, every night I tell myself stories to help me sleep, I don’t remember being the little kid with a teddy bear and a parent to regale me with fairytales while I lie in bed. Is that why it’s taken me so long to get out of bed because I’m always waiting and a part of me thinks I need to give people something to read, but not my parents, and don’t think I’m becoming bitter again, remember when I first joined up with TIBU? It would be easy to become upset with “Indiana Gone,” “Okay,” Cherry,” “M Anime” but the bitch, of course, made me feel “sorry” about my words, hell I don’t share my favorite book with anybody because I need it.

“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.” ― Tony Montana Scarface (1983)

Now I could tell you I want to write to make money, whatever that sounds like to you but another reason I need to write is so I can sleep, I have more than enough stories to put me to bed, I want a story to keep me awake. Last fiction I read… okay watched like that was “Detroit: Become Human.” Am I ever going to let that go,? One day maybe but it’s not my favorite. There are better, any story that’s not in my head for starters. Stories that I see on my laptop screen, better are stories I see on print, stories that I see in green, that only require my signature, or I take to bed because everybody has a tale.

Mine come harder because as they say a picture is worth a thousand words and yes I continue to hate that concept but to get to that point I have to write the words for now and then I can sleep. How’s that for motivation, I’ve been listening to so many speeches and these men work so they can live a life they dream about honestly maybe that should be me too, but I would do damn near anything for some time to sleep peacefully.

The strange thing about this is my stories don’t put me to sleep, not while I’m writing them at least. Still, There Are Better Stories.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 342 ~Happy Ending, Why Not~

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What did I think I would be doing this morning; I wouldn’t call today a twist ending but more the normal state of things but aren’t I always hoping for more, but some writers have a distinct style. Happy Ending, Why Not?

Friday, June 8, 2018

Lesson 342 ~Happy Ending, Why Not~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Can You Love Me Again, don’t answer that, again I am stuck on the concept of never wanting to know or being too dumb to figure it out, so I continue to write the question over and over. How about the dark erotic novels I read that have to tell you right off the bat that they’ll be Happily Ever After (HEA) because some people might not be able to take it?

Maybe I’m lazy again not working on my books, or perhaps it’s just how they say if you want to hear God’s laughter, go ahead and mention your plans because even today there is so much writing to do, but here I am “Laughing With” God because I have to go out. A part of me wants to say I won’t give up but if yesterday taught me anything, sometimes “you gotta give it up to get off sometimes I know” you know “Stop.” I could say I should stop writing a story and start living one, but the thing is we know that story would have no happy ending in the long run, and even if my stories are mediocre I refuse to live that way in real life.

Do I even know how to create a happy ending anymore, you know “Temptations Road” even in that I couldn’t make a final decision, but in case anyone is reading this I won’t spoil it. Speaking of spoiling something, what happens once I reach 365 days of lessons, it’s not like I thought I would have discovered a way to make money with this blog… how did “22 Words” start, how about publishing a book; plans am I right Sophia. Today’s story is about preventing a tragedy with my dog, working a dead-end job, and making sure I don’t starve to death, in other words, groomers, bank, and chicken finally.

If anything I would much rather have a Twilight Zone ending or should I quote my newest rule, 265 The Twilight Zone Beats Friendzone, and talk about being torn between two places am I right. Even more so if you count all the worlds that I have made thus far and in July I’m planning on writing one more and then how about November and this all proves the pen is in my hand or keyboard under my fingers right?

Nothing like writing to give one the knowledge of godhood and people wonder why I talk about sex all the time, as they say, sex is all about power, and maybe I want that power like in “1984.” Happiness shall be in the eye of the beholder. I believe in such a thing as The End; Happy Ending, Why Not?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 335 ~A Little Write Longer~

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Hold on just a little while longer; I told myself that at work, riding through today’s storm, and nearly every single day when it comes to waking up and I believe everything will be alight and why is that? “A Little Write Longer.”

Friday, June 1, 2018

Lesson 335 ~A Little Write Longer~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Can You Love Me Again, did you ever stop, and you’re only holding on for hope in something, so close to letting go but you just can’t because for some reason you believe everything will be alright? How many times this week have I mentioned “Detroit: Become Human,” and one of the things bugging me is “The End,” “And They Live Happily Ever After” or even if they don’t this story has torn me apart Lady Sophia.

What does that say about my writing, is that why I’m feeling so depressed besides witnessing the end of a great story, it’s like going to the movies without reading the book but in this instance the film is glorious, the game itself might destroy me. So many endings Lady Sophia but I’m trying to abstain, and then again I think about the end of my book. I read somewhere that the key to a protagonist is figuring out what they want and making sure they never get it; my main character gets plenty of sex but what about this thing they call love honestly?

“There are two types of tragedies in life. One is not getting what you want; the other is getting it.” Yuri Orlov, Lord Of War

I know I’m always repeating myself but what did I say about my habit of writing the problem over and over, hoping that the answer will someday come to me and even if it did what’s next. If I fail, if I succeed, at least I’ll live as I believe, Whitney Houston sang that but I’m not living at all, too afraid of both outcomes and that’s why I keep writing as if I indeed have much more to say. Stupid how I struggle for the words then and I don’t think they’re missing it’s only the fact that I want so much that The End is impossible and when it comes, well here’s today.

“I wanna stay inside all day
I want the world to go away
I want blood, guts and chocolate cake
I wanna be a real fake.”
Marina & The Diamonds

We’re not immortal Lady Sophia, them again “Don’t Fear The Reaper” instead he fears me but today how many times have I listened to this song. It’s like my new “Easy Street,” and the street is far from easy, passed right by the post office, got caught in a storm, etc. No one knows the future, only one more reason to be a writer, one more reason to live a thousand lives through art because this one life I know I have is going nowhere fast, but I’m moving forward aren’t I or I was.

So I’ll hold on just a little while longer, tomorrow hopefully will be a productive day but who knows the future, that would be writers, but frankly I’m tired and still, A Little Write Longer.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 264 ~My Love Is Blind~

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As the song goes, “I want to f*** you like I’m never gonna see you again,” but maybe she hasn’t noticed me, the real me, my pretty words, replaced with dirty urges and so I’m not much to look at or listen to I think. My Love Is Blind if this is love.

Thursday, March 22, 2018

Lesson 264 ~My Love Is Blind~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I Am Not Fine Today, and no there aren’t any body issues… okay, maybe a few as I still avoid mirrors but that’s more of an emotional thing than physical, though I did say yuck in a Walmart dressing room. Anyway, my lesson for today is that you can’t avoid all mirrors, namely the eyes of a woman to be honest.

Now they say love is blind true enough, but it starts with attraction because without that how can you move forward, even the internet is like that, could you imagine people falling in love sight unseen? Dirty Diana this is getting to be a bit more emotional when I meant it to be physical; so yes in the everyday world people like to think they see all, but in the bedroom, well there are handy ways around that. Personally, I like to watch a girl’s eyes, even men want to feel desirable, but I can’t see that happening in my foreseeable future, but okay let’s say I get lucky soon.

There are reasons for a blindfold; again I’m having a bit of trouble between my emotions and my desires (one of my six impossible things), but I’ve been thinking about Beauty & the Beast, not the fairytale though I have some Belle outfits for a potential submissive. I mean Skye Warren’s take on how even when Erin and Blake were together, how he didn’t want her to see him; it reminds me a bit of Cyrano de Bergerac and how his words got another man laid. No fucks given, yeah because I gave all my pretty words to other guys so they could bed girls and here I am, alone again naturally, the song plays.

So why would I want to blindfold a woman; I’m sure I told you before about my tentacle fetish and the idea of using several dildos along with my cock to simulate a rough gangbang, now wouldn’t that be something. How about “Revenge of the Nerds” Lewis and Betty, now in that Lewis was wearing and mask, but Betty was blind to who he was, didn’t this technically count as rape seeing as how they fucked but she didn’t know and if she had maybe…

I could go darker you know me; Dirty Diana, my fantasies are better left in the darkness but the girl I love one day she’ll understand… My Love Is Blind.

Lesson 257 ~Weak In The Knees~

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Who needs words sometimes, some people go to God, but I’m only a human that likes pleasure and let’s just say some girls look so much cuter with something in their mouths and while I can cook I was thinking of something else. “Weak In The Knees”

Thursday, March 15, 2018

Lesson 257 ~Weak In The Knees~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I Am Not Afraid Anymore, I mean I suppose it doesn’t take that much trust for a guy to stick his dick anywhere, most relationships begin and end on that concept, and you even have to ask, how the first man figured out sex let alone blowjobs. You know I’m no different; even when I don’t care, I like to keep my options open; this girl told me once if I got her McDonald’s she’d be happy but if I made her my world famous pasta, I’d get a blowjob… I did both, does that make me, generous, selfish, or self-serving?

Haven’t I always said, I want a woman that not only keeps me on my toes but knocks me off of my feet, talk about ways to make a man weak in the knees or maybe I’m just getting old? Old enough to know the truths of somethings, the way to a man’s heart right, yeah I still get butterflies, and yes I like to eat, and all the work I do with these knees of mine just to get a girl on hers. How about the old idea that you take an arrow in the knee as a way of saying you propose, the right girl on her knees and then bring on forever and I could see myself taking an arrow to the knee but not today Diana.

I’m still just a man, not a God, not that I would demand that type of worship, speaking of which though “Cock Worship” is a must-have when it comes to a submissive and a future wife if I were ever that lucky. Before you knock it, “Bryci – Daughter’s Best Friend” talk about someone you want to listen to and at least we’re not talking about my dirty mouth at the moment, the things we do not to speak, like going down on a girl. If you were to ask me though, does a girl who spits or swallow, for some time, getting to cum on a girl’s face is the bee’s knees as some say?

One of the reasons I’m a damn good dominant and so demanding of a submissive, I spend too much time on my knees; never been one for thoughts and prayers but I got to keep doing my job and if I had some girl waiting for me to come back. Let’s just say Dirty Diana, that sucking me off makes her, Weak In The Knees.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 216 ~Beautiful From A Distance~

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For once I look to the future with hope instead of dread, no my dear Lady Sophia all the terror lies here in my words, no wonder I write for others and not for myself after will be more beautiful than now, I think Beautiful From A Distance.

Friday, February 2, 2018

Lesson 216 ~Beautiful From A Distance~

“I just like admiring pretty things from a distance” ― Benji, Alone Together Pop-up (2018)

Hey Lady Sophia,
I Am Not Afraid Anymore; everything is so far off in the distance that you lose all fear of it, editing my book, editing my statement for human resources, or even writing something for Publishers Clearing House. To be fair PCH probably has better odds than the first two, and speaking of people I feel like I owe, don’t I need to write a book review as well, today’s the day right?

A whole month has passed, and I haven’t even looked at my finish novel yet for NaNoWriMo, though I can’t say I’m any more excited that I was when I first finished it. There is also all my procrastination; I swear if I could write excuses for a living I would be in the money, what was it this morning, I felt sick, I have to write a statement to human resources about not writing a full account. Screw PCH but didn’t I tell an author that I finished reading their work and that means one more review, I gave my word, ha my word.

I have fifty thousand words ready to roll, and instead I write about somebody else, isn’t that the story of my life, I don’t have one word for myself because I have so many people speaking for me, the man in the mirror. Lady Sophia, I dream of the man in the distance, the rich man, the wealthy man, the brave one, the guy that won’t be alone, think something like Eli Stone Live Brave. Think of this though, stars are beautiful, but they are just explosions, I’m sure some people believe bombs are awesome until they are pointed at you and falling straight down?

I see success in the distance but in my face is nothing more than a bunch of garbled words, and there goes justice, but I could get a pink slip tomorrow; what about when I was playing PCH every day, and they came here and gave the grand prize to somebody else. For now, I have one more author doing what I have already done, but she’s making money and again my curse to help other people I’m just a regular Darth Plagueis, just saying.

So when will I start writing for myself again, a better question, when will I start writing and getting paid, it’s not like it hasn’t happened? As Bill Cosby put it, “you pick” but then again is he somebody I want to take advice from these days then still I’m a reviewer, and my words look Beautiful From A Distance.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 211 ~Here’s To The F-Words~

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Well, which one shouldn’t I say Fear is always a no-no but what about fair, no not me, or friends, be my guest; forget failure or epic fails. Still, I might be fired soon, *gulp*. Here’s To The F-Words and the one that seems to be avoiding me always.

Sunday, January 28, 2018

Lesson 211 ~Here’s To The F-Words~

To Will:
I Am Not Afraid Anymore, but a lie has always tasted better than the truth, but I wouldn’t feed it to you, not purposely or deliberately but then you would go hungry wouldn’t you? Hunger, back to the wall, surrounded, it’s enough to make one scream the F-Word, yes I’m back to censoring myself but what exactly am I leaving you with after the week that I’ve had, you know it’s not fair.

Fair, life is not fair, isn’t that what they say and that’s the truth, but we’ll get to that, but even Billie Jean roared “Fair Is Fair” and what happened to her? Fired though that was only in effigy, whatever would become of you if you got canned this week and for what, because you refuse to make friends or have fun. Friends and fun are words that you would never use to describe work, and there is one excellent F-Word for the guy that runs the place but wouldn’t that just make you a failure, like me, with everything that happened and didn’t last week, those goals of ours.

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants, (Day 25 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed Day 32
2. I Will Go Outside, Not Work Or Just Walmart, But Starbucks, Bookstore, Library
Failed
3. I Will Not Censor Myself
Failed
4. I Will Smart Off To Somebody At Work
Completed (HR)
5. I Will Focus More On The Dog And Pretty Girls
Failed (Depression)
6. I Will Work On My NaNoWriMo Novel
Failed

Fail, no an Epic Fail as the kids say these days and what can I say about number four, after everything that happens during the workday to me and the moment I choose to stand I leave you on the brink of war, I’m sorry. Fear is not something I want for you but it is here, and it will be waiting later on this week so is that another goal, indeed that is the all-consuming goal for your life or the life you want to have. Forget everything that has happened to me this week, but that will be next to impossible I know but do, that’s what we strive to do now name those six impossible things Will:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants, (Day 32 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Keep Working The Day Job Despite Everything
3. I Will Not Spend A Full Day In Bed (Not More Than 8 Hours In 24)
4. I Will Forget About Last Week
5. I Will Focus More On The Dog And Pretty Girls
6. I Will Work On My NaNoWriMo Novel

What more can I ask of you, that you will have a future because I already said I want you to forget about me and does that make me a hypocrite wanting you to erase the past but without it, without me, you don’t have a future? Future you’ll have one, but this shouldn’t just be about what I want you to do for me but something for you, I can’t say what makes you happy because you’re still trying to discover such a thing.

So go and look and if not for then for the dog, he needs more treats anyway and who knows you might make it through this week without a certain F-Word but, to be honest Will, Here’s To The F-Words.

“Promise me you’ll find it.”

“Find what?”

“The life of a Victor.” Mockingjay Part 2

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 209 ~For The Write Man~

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Words against words, why must we humans create wars with everything that we touch, if it weren’t for certain “aspects” I swear I could take a vow of silence like some monks because if you don’t have anything nice to say? “For The Write Man”

Friday, January 26, 2018

Lesson 209 ~For The Write Man~

Hey Lady Sophia
I Am Not Afraid Anymore, even when I know my name is on some form somewhere, or at least I hope it is; I’ve always thought my future will know fruition along a sentence or two, hopefully not a prison one. With everything, I have ever written, and with everything I have ever said, I still find myself striving to find the right ones, not that I have anything against lust or wrath, or what I would call “love” to be sure.

This week’s words haven’t been right at all and no I’m not talking about the general manager, those words were kick ass, I had a backbone. I suppose I’m trying to drown out the others, the police reports, work, the bitch and don’t worry I think I have spoken enough about how much my writing has cursed me in days long gone. All the same, people fear silence, and it’s enough to drive one insane; tell me a story, but it has to be the story I want to hear.

Part of the reason I’m a reviewer or I should be, I’ve been falling behind with that too, and it dawns on me that I’m not the right man for the job because I say what I usually think in the laziest way possible. Let’s not kid ourselves, Lady Sophia, none of us are right to judge that’s why we specialize in execution; I saw that Larry Nassar got sentenced, according to his story he did nothing wrong, to so many others of course he did, the people believe, hell I agree. My point is what story do we choose to hear, to concur with, the man wrote his own, wrong as it is and yet silence is unwanted honestly.

You have the right to remain silent, how I look at those words now, at my job I don’t but at the same time you don’t have the right, to speak the truth, so let me take a page from Ernest Hemingway. We’re not friends but enemies, I hate you, I despise you, I will never forgive you, and you are a waste of air for all of our humanity.

I won’t ever say those words to him Lady Sophia but that’s my story for him, my review, and I’m sure there are many of me, but he is the wrong man to say this to and as for me *sigh* For The Write Man.

I Will Have No Fear