Episode 258 ~Blind Faith To Will~

Do I still think I can see into the future, I wrote this Wednesday, and I saw this day going a lot better, only I wasn’t blind to some girl, I know what I need to do, and tomorrow sigh. Blind Faith To Will

Saturday, March 16, 2019

Episode 258 ~Blind Faith To Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, today is Wednesday. I’m still STUCK on the idea that I will write a best seller. Now if I had the money this second, I know there is no way I would be going to work on Sunday. My problem is that I don’t see the money though. I see Inventory, insanity, and indignation. One of my motivations says that no one can hate you more than you hate yourself. Only nowadays I look, others don’t.

In a way I envy them. In some ways, a button is worse than a trigger. Do you recall when I was talking about Brainbuddy (which you should CANCEL Friday okay)? My deep confusion about what classifies as porn. Yep, I lied to those people “One? Yeah.” Giving up Fapping, sure. The porn, hell after doing the Morning Routine, it was right back to the Heartless Prince. After that Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest. Still, nobody can show me something more beautiful than women. Some people tell me to have faith in God. Blind faith and those same people were the ones that made me out to be a nerd or worse. So my eyes were too full of tears. I was busy getting up close and personal with a baseball bat, balled fist, and my blood in the dirt most days.

I saw this religious movie once called Apocalypse, and there was this guy Bronson Pearl. Now he wouldn’t listen to his girlfriend or some story. He dug up his father’s grave and only at that moment did he find faith. Faith Lady Luna is work. I was looking at myself, and for once it wasn’t my fucked up teeth (LANGUAGE). Nor was it my body; it was my bloodshot eyes from working.

Nevertheless, with my writing, I do not see the results and the day job sigh. I’d rather be dead instead. Now that sounds harsh, but it’s like everything in my world is, I don’t know. In one way it’s living in a museum, don’t touch that it’s priceless. Don’t think that, those people were savages. Stay behind the rope, the line, the people. Better yet don’t look ever.

Am I back in school before I had my glasses? Only I couldn’t see the board so of course, I failed. Math where I was expected to get it, but I never did. So I bought into lies, and now I’m an adult where there is no future in my job. Walmart fails ha, or my eyes are stuck on a screen, headphones always. Is that the game, you see too much or too little. However they say look up, and even the sun is blinding. Still, I know every shade of blue there is. I can’t close my eyes anymore, but why believe in myself, Blind Faith To Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 136 ~Plague Two Pay Will~

Well, I found my niche, but my title doesn’t reflect it sadly, not that I’ve shared the novel with anyone as of yet, is that a big sin considering I have four already written, best read in the dark, with the lights off. Plague Two Pay Will.

Wednesday, November 14, 2018

Episode 136 ~Plague Two Pay Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
How To Make One Million Dollars, ignore everybody else or at least that’s how Republicans look at it and that should count as a pretty big sin shouldn’t it, turning my back on the world, for this month at least. I know this is Lady Sophia’s wheelhouse, but there are days like these I remember why it’s right and okay to neglect humanity and then well Michonne:

“But the truth is the path ahead has only grown darker. It’s harder to see. You can feel so lost so alone so desperate for something, anything that might show you the way. But even now, after all this time, surrounded by darkness there are still flashes of light tiny beacons that shine out, calling to us. It’s not enough to light the way ahead, but it’s enough to keep going. Keep trying. Keep fighting. Keep dreaming.” Michonne TWD 6X09

I’m sure I’ve said on more than one occasion that I value the darkness in all its forms because I don’t want people to see, take my novel, for example, people are either in a brothel, below a beast or beneath a boulder and how’s this for irony. I want people to be blind, and at the same damn time people see these things only to call them out, so I give the people what they want, whether I want to or not, that’s my first sin. My second sin is, that while I’m making it a habit of ignoring all those people I face, here I am tonight appreciating someone who did inspire a name change of my book from “Plague Two Pay” to “Pay Two Plague” Inspector Echo.

“Look at my eyes, Faye. One of them is a fake because I lost it in an accident. Since then, I’ve been seeing the past in one eye and the present in the other. So, I thought I could only see patches of reality, never the whole picture.” Spike Spiegel

I suppose people have two eyes for a reason, two ears, then the trinity of one brain, one heart, and whatever’s going on between people’s legs these days, which is my third sin that my balls are no longer suffering for No Nut November. I think I’ve already talked about my coworker who’s having a series of trials and tribulations but is it a sin to not know what to say, hell Inspector Echo today was filled with not knowing a thing, tonight even I don’t know where my story is going, the darkness. The idea is the things that light me up, and here we go again, the glow of women, the crinkle of dollars, and a tale of blood, my impossible, immoral, illegal bouts of insanity and a lack of sleep this week.

Should I leave it at that, three sins isn’t too bad but again, idle hands. Yes I have been far from that this week but there is so much work left to me honestly, and the new world is built upon the bones of the old always and yes I feel it in my own but grateful for “B III.” Will you forgive me Inspector Echo, for being so accommodating to the masses, for practicing the art of “Doublethink” when it comes to hating people’s opinions and loving them, and for not controlling myself all the more, my sins a disease, Plague Two Pay Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 264 ~My Love Is Blind~

As the song goes, “I want to f*** you like I’m never gonna see you again,” but maybe she hasn’t noticed me, the real me, my pretty words, replaced with dirty urges and so I’m not much to look at or listen to I think. My Love Is Blind if this is love.

Thursday, March 22, 2018

Lesson 264 ~My Love Is Blind~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I Am Not Fine Today, and no there aren’t any body issues… okay, maybe a few as I still avoid mirrors but that’s more of an emotional thing than physical, though I did say yuck in a Walmart dressing room. Anyway, my lesson for today is that you can’t avoid all mirrors, namely the eyes of a woman to be honest.

Now they say love is blind true enough, but it starts with attraction because without that how can you move forward, even the internet is like that, could you imagine people falling in love sight unseen? Dirty Diana this is getting to be a bit more emotional when I meant it to be physical; so yes in the everyday world people like to think they see all, but in the bedroom, well there are handy ways around that. Personally, I like to watch a girl’s eyes, even men want to feel desirable, but I can’t see that happening in my foreseeable future, but okay let’s say I get lucky soon.

There are reasons for a blindfold; again I’m having a bit of trouble between my emotions and my desires (one of my six impossible things), but I’ve been thinking about Beauty & the Beast, not the fairytale though I have some Belle outfits for a potential submissive. I mean Skye Warren’s take on how even when Erin and Blake were together, how he didn’t want her to see him; it reminds me a bit of Cyrano de Bergerac and how his words got another man laid. No fucks given, yeah because I gave all my pretty words to other guys so they could bed girls and here I am, alone again naturally, the song plays.

So why would I want to blindfold a woman; I’m sure I told you before about my tentacle fetish and the idea of using several dildos along with my cock to simulate a rough gangbang, now wouldn’t that be something. How about “Revenge of the Nerds” Lewis and Betty, now in that Lewis was wearing and mask, but Betty was blind to who he was, didn’t this technically count as rape seeing as how they fucked but she didn’t know and if she had maybe…

I could go darker you know me; Dirty Diana, my fantasies are better left in the darkness but the girl I love one day she’ll understand… My Love Is Blind.

Lesson 246 ~Eyes On The Prize~

I wish I could say I have something dare I dream almost spiritual to fight for but yeah I’m a man I want a life, dignity, respect, but then again I will settle for so little and then what do you call love “Eyes On The Prize.”

Sunday, March 4, 2018

Lesson 246 ~Eyes On The Prize~

“We’ve got a vision.”
“Eyes on the prize, man. Eyes on the prize.” Road Worrier

To Will:
I Am Not Afraid Anymore; if anything you’re your worse enemy so why should it bother you what anyone else says, I’m the nightmare am I right? Maybe it’s the girl we’ve been thinking about because dreams have been few and far between but this one day girl has kept me and hopefully you out of trouble again.

The things we do for the women we don’t know but seriously, how could I have been so blind, what men will do for women, though for the record I wish I wasn’t so damn respectful to those bitches at work. Of course, you won’t say that this week, you’ll say plenty but how much will you live up to, you honestly must start thinking about your goals in life, which is why you’re up again after the mandatory window shopping isn’t that right? The world is full of beauty, and that is slowly driving you mad or madder but still it’s the things we don’t see; at this rate, you’re matching the Christians believing in something like the six impossible things each week like:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 02 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 06 No Fap)
2. I Will Find My Latest Amazon Order
Completed
3. I Will Get My Bank Account Fixed Up Finally
Completed
4. I Will Not Take Any Guff At Work
Failed
5. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Partial Completion (Do So Much Better)
6. I Will Work On My NaNoWriMo Novel, Finish Two Whole Chapters
Failed

Didn’t they used to say that with too much “Fapping” you’d go blind, is that the concept that is allowing me to see so clearly now; a good theory because you experience more of the beauty but God how you want to. Lust is the one thing you’ll always be sure of without a doubt because you’re already breaking certain promises to yourself but the girl you’ll someday marry will have expectations and as the song goes “practice what you preach.” Speaking of music, here we go again, those six impossible things, and if you could just do one a day, not so hard right:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 06 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Gift Part Of My Submissive’s Closet
3. I Will Post Two Reviews On My Blog
4. I Will Not Take Any Static At Work
5. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
6. I Will Find Something I Want Out Of My Life Honestly

Isn’t that what these things should be about anyway; if anything we always stare at what we need, and then we give into temptation; more and more Christian-like but I don’t have a chance at Heaven. Another theory why we’re always sleeping, because when you’re asleep the monsters can’t get you, and with no dreams or nightmares it’s the only time I’m not letting myself down, and I don’t have to worry what anybody thinks.

“Don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes,
This is your life”
Switchfoot – This Is Your Life

You see it now my friend, you’re a man of words, and I ask that you be a man of action, which would indeed be something impossible and will take longer than a week but that’s a prize. Being a man that can stand on his own two feet, he’s straight ahead in the mirror, so you keep your Eyes On The Prize.

“I see. I see pride! I see power! I see a bad-ass mother who don’t take no crap off of nobody!” – Junior Bevill, Cool Runnings

I Will Have No Fear

Pupil Pushed

Pupil pushed
Rolled into the skull
How I am bushed
This life a lull
Why bother a look
A word made dull

Blind to the kind
Was there ever such a thing?
So sublime
Look at me
And talk about kindness
Somewhere lost in the dark
Such is blindness
A breaking… that’s my heart

Blind in line
The back of someone’s head
When will it be my time?
I heard everything you said
Stay inside
No life to create
Outside
And so I wait

Blind to the time
The past I can’t forget
The future I can’t find
And what of the present
Today and tomorrow
What I have found
Sad hours follow
Tears threaten to drown

Blind in the divine
Can you see God?
Or only the blind
The mob
Leading the blind
Darkness mistook for light
Chained and tied
This isn’t right

Blind to what is mine
Which is nothing
So I don’t buy your lies
But to own something
To touch, to feel
If only to see
And I know it’s real
Yet I can’t even see me

So let my eyes roll
Be pushed to see lies
How am I to know?
I’m not the only one who’s blind

Copyright © 2011, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

No One Goes There

Nowhere to run or hide, to be stuck and afraid, or sometimes to even embrace this place in life, but who can truly do that? No One Goes There but how I have been reminded I was on my way so many years ago.

Where you gonna Turn
Which direction
Haven’t you learned?
Nothing but correction
Going round in circles

Left or right
By those that claim purple
Blinded by the light

Where you gonna Seek
Already there
What they say about the meek
Why should you care?
About a cure

The answer
It’s like cancer
Truth kills faster

Where you gonna Go
It’s a small world
Don’t you know?
So what if home were
Real

Monsters don’t confess
You know the deal
A life repossessed

Where you gonna Run
Can you even see?
In the setting sun
All you have is feet
And then you fall

Flat on your face
Do you bawl?
When the monsters taste

Where you gonna Hide
Nowhere
Because you’ll believe the lie
Are you scared?
You should be

Already lost
Not like me
Your soul the cost

Where you gonna go
Run or hide
No one knows
Or finds

No One Goes There

Copyright © 2011, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Shine Love

Girls like shiny things and that’s no secret but I think I would shine in the dark like any one star but in the end the sun always rises and I have seen myself in the light *sigh*. Shine Love… I suppose I understand, love may be blind but before that

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXGavbPAfE0

Millions of stars so shiny
What’s one wish compared to the others?
Here comes the sun
Juliet was Romeo’s only one
Wish you would love me like you do, “hey lover”
Love me, love me
Ain’t love blinding?

“Sorry” she says nope

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired By: Yuffie Kisaragi … Final Fantasy VII, Nina Simone “Here Comes the Sun”, “Romeo & Juliet” by William Shakespeare, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, LL Cool J ft Boyz II Men “Hey Lover”, and The Cardigans “Lovefool”

Hearing the Blame Love

Whoever said love was in the heart anyway… some many parts of one’s anatomy and we pick one so hidden, so vital, and then we offer it to someone which means we have to literally give all of ourselves. Hearing the Blame Love… if it rests in the heart?

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44KKe2qv6js

And I would blame Cupid…
if love WASN’T blind

Who else could I find?
My heart’s in a rage

But locked up in its cage
So why give the key to you

Do you love me like you do?
Not this time

I can’t seem to make you mine
and I would blame Cupid

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.