Tag: Marquis de Joker

Episode 271 ~Self-Harm, Write A Will~

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As Johnny Cash sang “I hurt myself today.” I’m not attempting to feel; if anything I am only to0 lazy to get out of the way of everything that’s hurting me and I find even cheaper ways to. “Self-Harm, Write A Will” how many have I done

Friday, March 29, 2019

Episode 271 ~Self-Harm, Write A Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How To Make One Million Dollars, they’ve already created Band-Aids, Beer. Somebody racked their Brain mass for Twitter. Only for Trump to use it the way he does. No Lady Sophia I’m not about to get political, what good would it do?

First off I’m not that STUPID. Wait am I, leaving my bag at the Day Job unattended for a few minutes. Of course, my mind has written the worst case scenario, a million times over. Still, the only person reading it is me. My left wrist, all day, I pinched, I snapped, I stung. I am reminding myself not to be STUPID. While I only became even more so. Tell me this what’s the correlation if any between depression and RAGE. Is it part of being Bipolar. It’s one more reason I write. The general manager said I say that the whole world is against me. So I create a world full of people in stories. All so I can do the most horrible things. I can kill them one after the other ending up Alone Again, naturally, The End.

Only it never is, is it, I don’t edit. Grammarly and Hemingway, are seas of color. Looking over my recent blogs, I don’t recognize myself anymore. Lady Sophia, at the same damn time I do. Allow me to dive into my fandoms once again. I might as well be a head on a stick in TWD. I need a golden pair of scissors and a red jumpsuit like in Jordan Peele’s “US.” So I can cut up this crap. Is that why I’m hurting myself? It’s only a rubber band, but I can’t stay awake. My eyes are a bloodshot red SNAP. Look up, POP, lift your feet PINCH. On and on but the RAGE Lady Sophia. So much, all at me, the man my “father” made me in existence. I’m STUPID no matter what.

My words might as well be, a sea of white in the shower though I’m abstaining now. Hasn’t even been a week yet, like those times I went without eating. I’m making room for more pain that I deserve. I ask myself WHY; I’m not suicidal or more like I’m lazy about the fact. Which again makes me STUPID. That’s my new word Lady Sophia, an oldie but a goodie. I suppose “skeevy” well who knows I may have lost one more friend today. Math is one of those things that did the most harm to me. My writing is the only way I can harm others. Torture for us all, but numbers? I know how many friends I lose, money, time, how many words for a new NaNoWriMo shirt. And this is how I hurt myself every day my great Self-Harm, Write A Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 266 ~You’ve Got Five Will~

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I’m not good with so few words. Could I be so crass as to dole out two? I work my fingers to the bone instead of pushing and fighting. Don’t get me started on love except for money, five months remaining. You’ve Got Five Will

Sunday, March 24, 2019

Episode 266 ~You’ve Got Five Will~

To Will:
How To Make One Million Dollars, now what if I gave you five minutes to think about that. You still think, “all I have to do is survive the next five minutes, then the world ends, and I won’t have to think anymore.” Okay, you want the end of the world, B III passes, your laptop gets smashed, you get stuck on the road. Something gets hacked, or your money runs out; any number of things you worrier.

I want to bring to your attention that you have five months. You PROMISED that in a year you’d be a millionaire and where is the money? Two girls and their tits. Wanting to make two more proud. More on a program not to imagine fucking them all (LANGUAGE). I’m speaking facts, what time did you get up this morning? It was 4:00 AM not 5:00. You know when you get to wake up that late it will possibly be the worse day of your life once again. God, I wish I could count bad days on just one hand. How about you’re praying that you don’t have to shake anyone’s hand. Fist bump that you could do everything in less than five seconds. How five minutes isn’t long enough to be prepared for work. That you make more than five mistakes; Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 011 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Crave (Addicted To You #1) K.M. Scott
    Failed
  4. I Will Enter The Mythic March Short Story Contest
    Failed
  5. I Will Read Crave (Addicted To You #1) by K.M. Scott
    Completed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

One out of five, 17.5 F and you know why? I keep one hand in my pants and the other on my keys. One palm is doling out meds the other pushing Triple B away. Ten fingers, two palms and you’re whining as if you’re fighting with a hand tied behind your back. You knew this was going to come back to “US” right? The life on the surface you hate and the monster beneath, you keep hidden. Everyone is too pretty, pissed, or popular and you’re a punk scared to make a fist Will. Five might be good enough for Goodreads. A few minutes to wake your ass up and feel as though you’re accomplishing something. Hell, your fantasies judging how long it took. Ahh Sofia Kasuli, Angie Varona, Alison Angel, the cosplayer and MILF. But Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Crave (Addicted To You #1) K.M. Scott
  4. I Will Enter The Mythic March Short Story Contest
  5. I Will Read Love The Way You Lie by Skye Warren
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

If you’re going to be thinking about FIVE anything, let it be the Impossible Things you know you can do. (Still failing at being the best father). Anyway, how about the five thousand words every off day come April. The fifty-five dollars you owe for “investment.” You have to start giving ten, a hundred, or as Eric Thomas is always preaching 120. You make sure to say hell no to those five, ten, fifty, hell even more individuals making you look stupid at the day job. Be Not So Fearful, but as always you still believe You’ve Got Five Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 264 ~Worse, Women, Writing, Will~

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My life is becoming more and more of a horror story every day, and I may take a pair of scissors to it, well more like a delete button; was I beginning to sound a bit creepy maybe? “Worse, Women, Writing, Will”

Friday, March 22, 2019

Episode 264 ~Worse, Women, Writing, Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How To Make One Million Dollars, wonder what’s impossible and then do that. Next thing you know, you have people paying to have you put them out of wonderment’s misery. Some will relish the pain and will amaze themselves with what they think of next, no doubt.

Women make me wonder. You know all those that I read “every day” oh yeah? What you can’t blame me Lady Sophia, this week has been the worse one in a long time. No need for amazement why it wasn’t the cosplayer’s horror short that sealed my fate last night. Wasn’t the MILF’s story either but more her glamorous breasts which she hates. Why “women being women” a picture is worth a thousand words. When how I picture women ropes me into plenty of trouble. Well, I’m still waiting for all the nicknames to go away at some point. Won’t be going away anytime soon, I’m skeevy, a pervert, plenty that are way worse Sophia.

Hey, that leads me to the writing that I ain’t doing. How come, because the writer needs a break. Holy cow I must need Brainbuddy back, and I’m always letting someone down. Hurts me you know to even fail those bastards (LANGUAGE) at work. Hell if I’m going to be a “screw up” it might as well be with my writing. Here’s hoping I get better at this style of writing, damn Grammarly. Hemingway App is more likely the culprit. Honey is my writing getting any better these days. Ha, I should watch what I say to women and today isn’t Thursday. Hacking up whatever I want to say in some effort to sound sexy or dominant. He could be capable of such things — Hocking one more excuse not to be writing. Hectically I headed out to see Us yesterday, which was a confusing movie. Head games to be sure and where’s my doppelganger when I need him. Him, whoever would I be talking about today or tomorrow, a week.

Yesterday I was shaking in my boots, panic attack. You know when I wasn’t too busy being a special kind of dumb. Yipping, yapping going on in my ears and I don’t even mean the dog. Young no more but who was I before he stepped into my world? Yellow belly coward, B III has made me brave but at work, at the movies, life in general. I am yep yawning my existence away because I no longer wonder sadly, what’s Worse, Women, Writing, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 259 ~Will Can’t Be Broken~

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It was more horrible than I could imagine Wednesday, you know how much I hate being stupid but how does the sight of stupidity hurt so much more, any plans for a good day at work Ha were shattered, smashed, broken. Will Can’t Be Broken

Sunday, March 17, 2019

Episode 259 ~Will Can’t Be Broken~

To Will:
How To Make One Million Dollars, I’ve said it before, so it’s on repeat. Ahem the comedian is dead, but that was funny wasn’t it. Hell, you can’t afford to let your lips break apart. Your shoes to leave the dirt, your eyes to open yet you’re here.

I can’t imagine the day you’ve experienced. Not that things on Wednesday are looking all that bright but you. What’s the motto “Endure And Survive.” Hopefully, you’re not Fapping since you canceled Brainbuddy right? My bedside manner leaves much to be desired. I’m even tempted to say that if you’re not reading this, then the worst is over for you. Only you’re not burying yourself, braindead, or broken enough. Today was harder than my whole week. For now, I can’t even say how you’re looking, but I tried Will. All I can offer, I tried. All these six impossible things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 011 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
    Completed
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
    Completed
  5. I Will Read Heartless Prince: A Dark Captive Romance” Stella Hart
    Completed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

Two is always a failure because only a real man can be a father. That’s why last week I went so hard at one. I don’t know if you should be ecstatic, or exhausted, empty. You are still waiting for that miracle that someday you will remember to exhume yourself. I dream that I might have the gift of prophecy, along with time travel. I know that a fire is still burning inside of you. That’s why you are never broken in entirety but reforged. You know the ugliest of swords can kill again. A broken shield means you move that much faster. An enemy Will, whether it be silence or you say something. You make sure that no suit of armor can protect them. Sigh but all this talk of fighting there’s Work to do with Six Impossible Things.

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 011 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Crave (Addicted To You #1) K.M. Scott
  4. I Will Enter The Mythic March Short Story Contest
  5. I Will Read Crave (Addicted To You #1) by K.M. Scott
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

I am sorry that I can’t stand with you for this portion because I don’t know what things your Sunday will entail. However, this does provide me with a rare opportunity. I know how you never reread your work. Only to copy your failures might I inspire you, my friend.

You might hate the place and keeping in mind how many places you know brokenness. No, you can never repair them all in one sitting. Could that explain why you’re so tired all the time? That is something we both have in common because we might not live, but we survive. We “never give up,” you are a man, FIGHT!

Monday is going to be worst I believe, another battle. Nevertheless, another good point is that I can’t break you any more than you are right now. What, I’m going to do even more rewrites? My friend, remember these four words, Will Can’t Be Broken.

I Will Have No Fear

Sell My Soul To Who

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If my soul were still worth anything, I would sell it to the devil, but for now, all I want is a job application from Brandon Grant or the paperwork to make his kind of deals and the money or how about Jade West’s next book? Sell My Soul To Who?

Sell My Soul To Who

Isn’t it funny that people are supposed to give their souls to this deity or that one? Whereas it’s only the evil ones that want to make a “decent” deal. Not that this story is evil, sexy, salacious, some would say this is my dream? An excellent beginning to a series that is on my must-read lists. Five stars without a doubt and I wish there were more. Didn’t I say series and if Jade West keeps this up, wow.

How dare I say the setup for the story is somewhat familiar. It’s what I imagine happens, in reality, all the time. Indeed being a guy, I can tell you of a couple of pornos, that start with the pretty girl needing something. Always a man willing to oblige. Except that’s only for a day or career. Right off the bat though “Sell My Soul” by Jade West demands sixty days though it won’t take that long to finish this story. However trust, I read this in less than a week. Now this review, yeah, I’m not giving anything away here. Sixty days to make all your financial troubles disappear. Moreover, according to Paige Emmerson, that’s more than worth it, for the love of sisters.

As fast as I fell for Paige, Brandon is the man I want to be. Talk about the eye, the expertise, the excellence in his character. If you made the story about him running his successful business, I would have still read it. Sell My Soul reminded me a tiny bit of The Art of the Pimp. Only this is fiction, but as I said, I believe this does happen to a certain extent. Although you don’t have to feel bad about it, reading this novel; you don’t feel anything. Well turned on, twisted, and thankful that you found this story between Paige and Brandon. Wow, this lifestyle, that leaves you wanting so much more. I too was one of those made panting and salivating.

No, you didn’t think I was going to compare myself to Paige? How I want a woman like her or more. To have the ability to make deals like that. I could have liked the business model more than the story. It’s not an original concept to be sure, but the author makes it theirs in this tale. I imagine like so many of the female characters in this novel one question. How many women right now are saying that they would never do something like Paige’s deal. Only then, there’s the big price tag.

Of course, you’re not here for my philosophy on the subject. You’re here to find out why I love Paige so much. Because of how Brandon felt for her, not Rebecca Lane, his new toy. Not the cast of mean girls which there were some, could measure up to Paige. Brandon himself, what do you call it when a man gushes over another? All I can say is that he’s the man and I can’t imagine having such swagger. He’s who I aspire to become.

Paige Rowan Emmerson, now if any fellas are reading this, I have two words for you “Reality Kings.” The end, pretty much the whole story. Ladies will you stop me if you’ve heard this one. Pretty college girl, family issues, needs money and sells herself off. Novel sounds like the usual fanfare correct? I suppose the author wanted you to find some investment in Paige. Why wouldn’t I be into, a brunette, innocent, with dirty leanings, that’s my type. Other than that she is an incredibly strong character and Paige has you wanting to root for her. I mean right down to the ending I was ready to get the next book, what can I say a guy has been busy, but this story stays.

Much like Brandon Grant, while I’m somewhat used to the alpha male motif in this genre. There are less than one handful of men I’ve wanted to emulate, and Brandon again is living the dream. A businessman who creates porn. Pimps girls, and punches out drunks and druggies. Men daring to mess with his property, and other than his brother, there is no mention of some criminal empire. What is it with women and the whole kingpin dynamic I ask myself sometimes. He also has that I don’t believe in love mentality. Yes, I’m a stalker, plus I have a ton of money. While the payoff drives him and Paige together, there’s so much more.

Like so many of the characters in this book like Paige’s sister, Phoebe May. The most current plaything. I did not forget Rebecca Lane who is but one more example of what Brandon can do to someone. Some characters only get a page or two. You never feel like you’re missing out. Not on motivations, their lives, and those they choose to associate with on the daily. Your heart will break for Paige at times.

As for breaking I could give Sell My Soul a few more stars. However, the five on Goodreads will have to do. I felt this story so much. So if you don’t want any spoilers, you can stop right here and go and buy yourself a copy. Can I not say anything negative about this book? It will be HARD which is how I felt during a few of the scenes. Just let me attempt to control myself right here.

The beach scene between Brandon and Paige and then the guys that she also met there. I don’t think you will see stuff like that on the show “What Would You Do.” Still, I’m somewhat surprised some adult entertainment company hasn’t run with it. Nearly every moment between Brandon and Paige was awesome. Usually, with stories like this, there will be a bit of blah. The author is waiting to take it to the next level in the next book; I was riding on the edge of my chair with this title. Rebecca Lane is caught running her mouth about her experiences to an innocent Paige. After everything that happened, we see how she has become. A true submissive to Brandon’s overwhelming sexual mystique somehow.

Characters flushed out as they were a smidge more backstory and build up. Number one because I was intrigued. The second because like most of these stories, why this knows basis in reality, again I question. Do women think like this and dare dream guys don’t like it? Brandon for all his bravado did for a moment have to rely on family ties. He sounded like the self-entitled rich boy. While it was true, it again fell into the realm of money. Can do anything still right; yeah? What was I complaining about now? The ending wasn’t so much a problem as the idea that I wanted more right away. I guess that’s more my fault but I know I’m getting the series without question.

For my first read from Jade West, I am all in, Sell My Soul is terrific work. It was right on my level which should be somewhat of a scary thing I suppose. Certain books will do that to you. I can compare the overall, concept of the title. The author made this story and that entire premise belong to her alone. Nevertheless, I have answered my question as far as book two and three, Sell My Soul To Who.

An Ending To The “Depredation” Book Review

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Such a long time, but I do need to bring a finale to my affairs and sadly this novel Natalie Bennett’s title didn’t have that, but it was pretty good if you ask me, wait you didn’t right, but yes the end has come. “An Ending To The Depredation.”

An Ending To The Depredation

There should have been, but I will get to that. For now, I will start at the beginning. As a matter of personal taste, I’m not a fan of Depredation title-wise. Still this story written by Natalie Bennett is solid. Nothing to write home about, not that Harper Lane would see much of that in this title. Neither at the beginning or the ending. I can’t stress the finish enough. Being a writer myself and all it can be stressful. However, Depredation or as a matter a fact most books in the erotica genre never do that. So yeah I will shut up now about women, and they’re everyday lives.

Well except Harper’s and that’s what we’re here for right? The girl getting kidnapped by the big bad and the aftermath. Which is pretty different than most and it’s not as if I’m giving anything away. Other than all the gory details of this sweet victimized pinup, yeah I said that. I’m a guy. The types of guys that read these stories and what; get turned on. Not as much by this as others, for example, Whispers In The Dark. Anyway, that was done over a more extended period and had the semi-traditional ending. I must applaud the author for keeping the focus on Jayce and Harper. Even more so the prison where Harper found herself. That’s a bit of originality. The victim is held in one area and not always moving in some way.

Now there is hope, only as I said before it becomes pretty different than in most stories. Still not giving anything away. But how to make a Monster 101. Furthermore, I wish there were a little more on Jayce as far as his madness. I imagine though a taste of Harper’s horror. It’s not the thing they put up when missing girls somehow make it back. Natalie Bennett did a superb job of touching that world. Parts of Harper’s life for two years, and then some more. Still makes me sad, the “then some.” I was looking forward to that payoff and payback, and well, that’s why we’re at four stars instead of five now.

On the flip side, what do I know? We’re going to see won’t we if you continue reading, but I’m not Depredation. The book held me from start to tripping over the finish line. Although to be fair I am inspired to give the author another chance. What can I say I’m a lot more merciful than our two main characters in this tale. Though you would never expect this from them, perhaps it’s strange. I wish Harper made it hurt more. Or at least we should get to read about it some, another chapter?

Harper Roseanne Lane didn’t stand out to me. Other than her type but she’s not the heroine. She’s not the vengeful angel but more. The everyday girl, and that’s the thing. That there was nothing spectacular about her, plain jane.

However, the way that she’s brought to life by the author through the eyes of her kidnapper. Not surprising that she’s unique. How I didn’t see it but when it came to the pain? The gore made Harper so much more visceral. The beginning and then the aftermath of her captivity was like night and day. Still, I keep going back to the fact that I wish there were more. Instead of the rush to put it to bed. Leaving me with a feeling of “what.” Not a cliffhanger but more of “that’s it.” You could write a whole other book or at least a novella about how she took her vengeance. Yes, it gets bloody somewhat near the end.

If you want fear though? Is it scary that I enjoy seeing through the eyes of the villain? I have a plethora of reasons for that. Here’s Jayce Charles Haywood, the clear-minded, I have a regular life. However incredible darkness sort of individual. I could only relate to his choice of Harper as I like the same look. How many women have I sent heading for the hills so far? Which is why I can see why this genre is female dominated. Anyway, Jayce was fleshed out more than his victim somewhat. So I can say I didn’t like him, but we shouldn’t I mean of course. Only and I can’t stress this enough. As “painful” as it was at times, it’s an excellent read.

There was a tidbit about other characters. Nevertheless, the standout would have to be Jayce’s wife Minnie which I find original. I can’t say I have read much in terms of the villains that have spouses. Well, the main characters anyway. While she wasn’t a willing participant, she still acted as a partner. Yes, pretty wifey was an accomplice to Jayce’s perversions. To a certain degree which was quite deplorable. That was a breath of fresh air; for a while. I don’t want to spoil the novel any more than I have now. I think it would have changed things up if she spoke a chapter in the tale. Minnie had an integral role and also gave me an idea for a story of mine.

As always I considered five stars for Natalie Bennett’s “Depredation,” but it wasn’t quite there. Rest assured that four is worth it and I’m about to go into spoiler mode. So if you want to stop here, that would be wise. Also if you are one for the positive but this is only me ranting about what went wrong. Know that I have no right to judge, but I have a few things on my mind. My brain sigh is a scary place I know.

The mental aspect was remarkable from the beginning. Showing what it could be like for someone like Harper that suffered the way she did. I would make a pretty lousy therapist. Because of what those stories do to me at times. The idea that you don’t get it all with Harper. Albeit with some of the most critical moments in her captivity. Your body begins to react to the pain she is going through. In every effort to somehow make someway for herself. Before the ending where the story trips up with Jayce. We get a nice bit of gore with Minnie and Harper’s wrath. Along with everything that she went through suffering so much.

The end though, right there. Time to break out the party favors and let’s see how far she’s going to take this. To become nothing; an excellent beginning and then a no thank you. As if the reader can’t handle what’s about to go down. Is it not the same for women I wonder? All the sexual depravity on the woman no doubt but now it’s the man’s turn. Is that a turn-off or something? Could be me but I wanted Jayce to pay. I suppose I could do with more story all the way around. I want to like Harper more. Somehow while again keeping everything practically in that room for so long. If to see more of her outside of it or in her house of horrors for Jayce, former assailant now victim.

Oh and the title change. I can see why it was so, but between you and me I liked the old title better. Being honest and on that note Whispers In The Dark by LeTeisha Newton is a quite detailed version of this title.

I’m looking forward to reading even more titles from Natalie Bennett. How many are said to have connections with the one I finished? Which would be awesome and maybe I’ll find, An Ending To The Depredation.

Episode 257 ~Will Deserved Love Letters~

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When I think back to when I was in college, the first girl I ever “love.” did me the service of rejecting me, others called me names and most even blocked me outright or had me begging and pleading. Will Deserved Love Letters and now I “write” books.

Friday, March 15, 2019

Episode 257 ~Will Deserved Love Letters~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How To Make One Million Dollars, don’t tell anybody a damn thing. It keeps bucks in your pocket, prevents blocking. Yeah, the police can’t put you behind bars. Only what do I tell myself in the future, seeing as how it’s Tuesday now. Next week will suck.

Let’s focus on the positive. I can say such beautiful things to a young lady. I’ll have her falling head over heels in love. Her panties are hitting the floor, in a word YES. Just not to me. Several other gentlemen are quite happy. That’s more of a reason to run a brothel. I’m no one to compare a woman to a summer’s day anymore. More like a Brazzers or Reality Kings model. Have you seen them, and of course that gets me blocked. I have sung to a girl. Think of the sweetest things. Butterflies, Rainbows, Pokemon and in every one of these examples I’ve never spoken of love. Not even like, but I do have an L for myself, and that is Loser.

I know Lady Sophia I have to stop. Come to think of it though did you CANCEL BRAINBUDDY. Again I’m writing from Tuesday, but this app was an act of love for myself. So far I like it but still confused, Erotica, Nakedness, Pinterest. Do they count as porn? Still not giving it up but a day clean? Today I went ahead and ordered my PS4. However, Walmart is a pain in the ass and no not from Cupid. So you wonder why I don’t believe in happiness. More like WORK, though today has been a significant setback. I didn’t read earlier, but I did go through the “Morning Routine.” Only yesterday I got so much done, but I’m tired.

At the day job all I kept thinking about is how someday I’m going to write how I love myself. Sophia the first part of that is writing. Every word that costs me a second of sleep is telling me, you are loved, wanted, alive. When I write my bestseller, I’m going to be signing autographs, books, and checks. I’ll make business deals, buy my land, the labor force, and LADIES. No, they’ll be filling my inbox, knocking my doors down. But their doors are open. I’m never going to stop writing Lady Sophia. Even with my restaurant, love hotel, and then my movie studio. I want to be “Pure Taboo” and “Fetish Network” even more so. The payoff, I’ll look at myself in the mirror. My beautiful wife with our kids. Little B III still on guard duty. Yes, I’ll know I was loved. But Will Deserved Love Letters.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 252 ~When Will, Will Win~

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This week has been one more series of L’s, the days were long, the ladies were lovely, and the people were laughing… at me; what can I say I have a big “ugly” mouth and maybe that’s why I’m struggling to see myself, to hear. When Will, Will Win?

Sunday, March 10, 2019

Episode 252 ~When Will, Will Win~

To Will:
How To Make One Million Dollars, only you were busy “trying” to free the Titans. A story idea, “A Tentacle That Wants The Victim To Itself.” Anyway, you should study Necromancy because every day you bring back the dead. You go to bed with a mess, and it’s like you tell yourself, you’re going to fix this. By morning give yourself a yay when you read your 15% of “Heartless Prince: A Dark Captive Romance” by Stella Hart. Sigh then you yawn and fall right back to sleep.

You don’t know how positive I want to be for you right now, which would be so easy at the moment. You’re sitting here well rested and all, the pain from yesterday near nonexistent. So much the better to kick you in the ass now. It could be that you didn’t give in to temptation because “Kininaru Kimochi” doesn’t play around. Along with everything else. Clothed mothers, cosplayers, and other things that make you want to almost? You even took the timeout for meditation. If anything that’s one more thing you’ll have to cancel at the end of the week. Funny how you can remember that list. Her boobs, their music, your penis, that store and yeah Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 010 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
    Failed
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
    Failed
  5. I Will Read “Lust” (The Elite Seven #1) by Ker Dukey
    Completed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

There was a moment you believed you would be done with Depredation and Sell My Soul. It was only yesterday you wrote a tiny bit more. But you are so busy fighting off, every other addiction, 5-hour ENERGY ahem porn. As I said your pain is “almost” gone, hand still hurts. Still, as far as adult entertainment, your new app has no clue what you want to do with your life. Fapping is one thing but your movies and books, what separates Erotica from Porno? The trick is mastering yourself before you can think to dominate another. While every week it seems I can’t get you to do anything. Still with a pair of boobs or some young people asking for sage advice. From a co-worker to a sweet English Tart but you can’t help yourself in Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
  5. I Will Read Heartless Prince: A Dark Captive Romance” Stella Hart
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

Will that will be your first win. Well except number two because you failed that by eight in the morning. Still the other five, that would be a step in the right direction. You have your new app. Only you want to leap, a win-win, and here we are two Wills, and your time is now, but by Tuesday you’ll bury him. By this time Sunday, you’ll be lamenting what you didn’t do. While the next week comes out of the grave, screw being a necromancer be a time-traveler. Another book idea, but I ask again When Will, Will Win?

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 250 ~Let’s Lie Down Will~

WillLeave a comment

The lie is I can’t get up, that I can’t face the world, that B III will live to meet his stepmom but the truth, I don’t want to get up, the world scares me, and Triple B is on three medications, yet I wish to create fiction. Let’s Lie Down Will.

Friday, March 8, 2019

Episode 250 ~Let’s Lie Down Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How To Make One Million Dollars, create the ultimate comfy spot for dogs. A product most owners won’t buy, a lie never accepted. Knowing at the end of the workday we want our fur babies with us. Sitting on our laps, furring up our couches, and bedtime.

That might be easier than writing because I’ve discovered something and that’s I’m not a good liar, and you know how I know? I’ve never convinced myself. A God that can’t convince himself of his creation; like the plot of Legion (2010). I’m not even a good thief because that goes hand in hand with lying. Only haven’t I said that fiction isn’t lying, again it’s creation. Still, everything from girls to gore, to the ground, is real. Writers have to bleed, and that’s one more thing I can’t do correctly. Like a body that lies Undiscovered and when it finally is what’s left, decay?

I haven’t gone through the majority of the Editor’s Notes on Apocalypse Rush. Though if a sea of red was any sign, damn near everything had to be separated and corrected. Not that they said it was terrible by any stretch. I wonder if the editor was a woman. I saw that it’s International Women’s Day and I did go to see Captain Marvel last night. Hell if I wasn’t sitting here with you telling me to Stop Crying Your Heart Out, what would I be doing? A pool of green from vomiting out the amount of cash I’m going to need for my novel. What about being Down With The Sickness that festers inside me. Word apps are leaving whoever I was rotting more.

Lady Sophia, if I want to write and learn how to lie, why don’t I tell you about the movie. How I strolled with confidence, paid, bought my snacks and saw a great film. No, I humiliated myself with an old ticket and agonized over it for two hours. Saw a decent movie and then felt right about a car accident because people were having a worse night. I could tell you I woke up feeling great, with a lot of energy and I plan to get so much done. Again I fell asleep till seven, my body is sore, I have to go out, and all I want to do is sleep. If my life were happy, I would go into nonfiction. Could become one of those reactors for TWD. As King Ezekiel put it “Fake It, Till You Make It,” will I go and lie down in bed or Let’s Lie Down Will.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFS_OksbYCc

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 245 ~Ain’t For That Will~

WillLeave a comment

As the song goes, “I ain’t for that walk,” the sadness from my couch to bed from another rejection, constantly worried at the day job until I get time to apologize, the doublethink of hoping she sees and then not. “Ain’t For That Will”

Sunday, March 3, 2019

Episode 245 ~Ain’t For That Will~

To Will:
How To Make One Million Dollars, stop what you’re doing right now. What is it they say about fortune and the bold but my friend it costs you everything, mastery, moments, and money.

Once more with the Titans, today, for now at least; it’s an “Eat A Dick” sort of day (Language). What was I thinking last night and what were you thinking this morning; can the bird get here any faster? Now we turn our attention to Sisyphus rolling the boulder up the hill. Yes, I remember writing out all our fantasies to one woman. Sending a “Butterfree” to another, and last night not learning from history sigh. Sending more fetishes to Court. You like that name because in a way you know judgment and no matter what you will face punishment. Still carrying the world on your shoulders great Atlas? Only it’s not that big, honestly and yet Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 010 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
    Failed
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
    Failed
  5. I Will Read “Deception and Chaos” (Chaos #1) by S.M. Soto
    Completed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

Look at you today, starting the week with a 34 F, but it’s not a 0. Now explain to me how are you going to get up for the Day Job when you have to and how many steps is that. Will you won’t take less than a hundred to get here. I know the wait is excruciating. The aftermath is exhausting, and the successes need editing. From your bank account to your writing, or maintaining any one friendship. One of your motivations talks about the body wanting to conserve energy. As you need every bit of it to cope. Another talks about being a lone wolf, and you carry so much. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 008 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
  5. I Will Read “Lust” (The Elite Seven #1) by Ker Dukey
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

Rule 066 states “Do You Step Or Leap” and you are starting to feel that 5-hour ENERGY. If you could have this “second wind” all the time? No, it wouldn’t be as if you’re on your way to the gallows, in that car as a kid waiting for your dad to beat you. How about walking into work. Why should you be afraid to push a button? To have to remind yourself to pick up your boots, or the way you’re backtracking in your mind over something you said. Don’t allow the thought to dare cross your mind. Where do you want to go, HELL you’re heading in the wrong direction. Always forward but one day up, lift your head, holdings, and headboard ha. Get over Prometheus, for when you know your path, where you are; Ain’t For That Will.

“I ain’t for that walk.”

I Will Have No Fear