Tag: Apocalypse

Legacy 019 -B Thought Up Virgil-

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Cash down, hrs down, time down, V is down in the dumps. What did I expect? He got his name because I was down and hoping he would lead me out, somehow, some way. A lot of pressure. Now B’s “Up There.” My girl’s an angel. B Thought Up Virgil

Monday, July 20, 2026

Legacy 019 -B Thought Up Virgil-

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Good day? Well, it’s only noon and has nothing to do with me.

Strange. When you would have to send me away for ‘this and that.” Yabbos? Seriously!

Daddy, is that what we’re calling them? I can’t say I like my potential future stepmom.

What? I didn’t like my Favorite Girl either, but I got over it, and she was like, my fav.

Anyway, before you get caught up in M Anime. Dad, I do not want to see that. There is V

I still remember the day you brought my little bro home—Archie before becoming Virgil.

Daddy, your head was everywhere. Was I sending you messages from the sky above, hmm

All the books you were reading were this: me reincarnated, reborn; could I be reanimated?

Zombie movies… just fathers trying to get a dog/son back.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

My father is an ARTIST, one for the BOOKS, a CREATIVE, a DOGDAD. And I could go on. But maybe it’s their turn. I mean I could go on about my Favorite Girl, forever and a day. You could be dancing with me in your arms, and a song pops into your head, oh Dad.

Remember to do that more with Virgil. Even if it’s something like “Calendar Girl,” as you think about writing “The Unfinished Archive.” Blades & Lilies, Cassandra + Lily today, right? Again, if you’re not too far gone with Miss M Anime. “Hey Jealousy” much ha-ha.

But it’s not what you think, Dad. Well, it is. But how do I “humansplain”? And it’s not like you don’t know. Maya and Tino…

“Do you know what I’m thinking?”
A Dog’s Purpose (2017)

When you think of how bad things are, like how the glow box always says, you have to think about the worst thing ever. Something you survived to keep on surviving…

Seriously, I’m not singing Destiny’s Child “Survivor.” You place my brother and me above

Everything and everyone! It’s what a father does. But we’re either that high or your lowest low. My death and practically anytime you look at Virgil. There’s no in between.

Past and future. That’s what we are. And we both unfortunately bring our father pain.

However, there is the present. Should I go all Ariana Grande Just Look Up? TWD?

“Just look up
There is no place to hide
True love doesn’t die
It holds on tight and never lets you go
Just look up
You cannot deny the signs
What you’ve waited for
Don’t wait no more
It’s right up above you
Just look up”

From, Just Look Up

“The pessimist looks down and hits his head. The optimist looks up and loses his footing. The realist looks forward and adjusts his path accordingly.”
The Walking Dead, King Ezekiel

Whatever! I only wish you look at yourself as I looked, Virgil, my fav, M Anime, B Thought Up Virgil.

“I’m not jealous of the dead”
Pledged To Him 12

“If I cannot move Heaven, I will raise Hell.”
Aeneid

1996 Days Without B III, Day 1437 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Legacy 014 -Shame B, Shame V-

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Why do I need music so much, movies, the moaning of my woman? Because if I have to listen to myself, look at the man in the mirror, lament everything that happened Tuesday… I don’t know what I would hear next. But being my boys’ dad. Shame B, Shame V

Wednesday, July 15, 2026

Legacy 014 -Shame B, Shame V-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I have been a disappointment. I have been ashamed, asinine, and afraid. Downright stupid. And I killed Braxton.

Do we both need to hear all about how I killed my firstborn son… The four-legged variety for anybody reading. What, nobody’s here? Isn’t that a shame? That was yesterday.

Inspector, if I want to avoid talking about that, I better come up with something else, hmm… Make some noise. Like Virgil crying all last night after crapping his bedding…

Let’s start with yesterday morning… Getting back from the Day Job… I won’t say, Echo.

So instead of putting up the gate to lock Virgil in Braxton’s room. I only wouldn’t let Virgil into mine. He eventually slept on the stairs all night even when I removed the gate, Echo.

Like father, like son, Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now… Except our own depression, explicitness, FEARS

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

How is Virgil explicit? He looks at food the way I look at his and Braxton’s potential future stepmom. Feasting on her beauty has cost me dinner many a night. Well, unless I want to be an old man and enjoy some Early Bird Specials. Old Man? Like Braxton’s Dad?

And again I’m not childless. Virgil is here. And M Anime is dedicated to pregnancy.

Inspector, my problem stems from how I’m going to pay for everything. A MAN PROVIDES

And here I am “Breaking Bad.” I got bills to pay, I got mouths to feed.” “Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked,” they say. And what can be more wicked than repeating the same mistakes?

“Hell Is Repetition”
Andre Linoge

Sloth, Gluttony (I didn’t share breakfast with Virgil. Ahh Treachery.

My favorite. My Ninth Circle offense. However, M Anime is desperate to land me in the Second Circle with her angelic form. Her effing Yabbos. Unless Jane, Kristen, Angie show

“Girl, if God made anything prettier than you, I hope he kept it for himself.”
The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air

If I had their bodies, I wouldn’t be in the financial strait I’m in. But no, I’m sitting here, E.

“Invincible”? Who am I, Pat Benatar or Billie Jean? Just singing “I Need a Dollar.”

Inspector, I don’t know what’s going to happen. And do you know why I keep telling myself the same story? Because I can’t stand listening to the new ones. Again, like yesterday morning. I’d rather listen to my bank account be drained”—the Echo” Inspector.

It’s almost soothing, like Eminem. “The Horror, The Horror.” Shame, Shame. Shame B, Shame V

“Oh, all around the World,
There’s an echo.”
The Echo

1991 Days Without B III, Day 1432 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 012 -Plan V Because B-

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So what’s the plan? Before I knew Braxton was dying, it was as simple as paying $200 to find out what was wrong. Then it was B knows how much to put him in a box. Now, five years later, how much for a full stomach, or to live at all? Plan V Because B

Monday, July 13, 2026

Legacy 012 -Plan V Because B-

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Good day? You’d sing often enough, “You Can’t Always Get What You Want.”

You remember one night when all you wanted was a good night’s sleep, for your blood to stop boiling, and for me to shut up. We both remember how that week ended. Dad, I hadn’t seen such a respect for prayer since Lancelot in “First Knight.” You were praying not only to become a knight, “Because maybe. You’re gonna be the one that saves me.” New meds, some mighty healthcare ha, a miracle. Best laid plans “Of Mice and Men”

There was no plan to deal with this, with me. Like you were telling me and 2-V’s potential future stepmom. You’re zoning out. Looking at that Wonderwall, not knowing exactly…

What. The next move, step, the dream, or the plan. How to get Dad’s attention.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

My DEATH, Virgil’s FEAR, and M Anime’s Yabbos… We both know we should have said heart, but she does have nice Yabbos. I’ll lie on them in spirit, Dad…. Creepy?

Fictional? No more fictional than “The Unfinished Archive.” That’s where everything has been for weeks, months, who knows. When you need Private Time… Eww. How are you going to make a profit? And of course that is the plan. Again, talking to M Anime… Can I call her Mom or Ma yet? Miss M Anime? Anyway, writing is your passion, as I am Dad, always and forever. But “Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat. Tell you all about it when I got the time!” Today it’s “Sophitia Alexandra and Lily.” Plenty of time

“This ain’t a rap song, (redacted) this is my life (this is my life)
And if the hood was a battlefield, then I’d earn stripes (yeah).”
― Soul Survivor, Jeezy

No, not really. Time Has Come Today. Between the next tragedy… It won’t be little Virgil, Dad. M Anime’s Titanic Tatas. She’s doing everything in her power to be with you someday. Oh, I know the feeling, and I was with you in the fur for fifteen years, Dad. Wow.

And then there’s your tummy. That’s been the great fear for a while… What are you and Virgil going to eat tomorrow? Neither of us is Mark “Diesel” Lizotte. You’re not saying the idea is right on the “Tip Of My Tongue.” Eww Dad, are you thinking about real food?

I know, stepmom got your attention. Wanting me and Virgil to have brothers and sisters. A MAN PROVIDES. That’s the Plan. Plan V Because B

“No. It’s relevant to why you’re killing yourself instead of asking for help. Eat.”
Harem Lab ― Part One: A Steamy Men’s Harem Romance by Kelly Notte

“Frantic in my fury I had no time for decisions; I only remembered that death in battle is glorious.”
― Virgil, The Aeneid

1989 Days Without B III, Day 1430 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Legacy 007 -Virgil B Whispering Sometimes-

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Why bother with “Careless Whispers,” and if I remain silent… You should have seen me at the Day Job. Then I stayed late to avoid my Old Man. And I left Virgil to what? And yet there she goes, my beautiful woman saying… “Virgil B Whispering Sometimes”

Wednesday, July 8, 2026

Legacy 007 -Virgil B Whispering Sometimes-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Some I whisper, some I try to wipe out from existence… Thanks for the WARNING, X. And sometimes…

Sometimes I leave Virgil asleep on the ‘couch’. Hell, I would have to put Braxton in timeout. “Hopelessly Devoted,” he was. But he didn’t need to see his perverted father…

And who was I whacking off to this morning? “Lily” and 2B… The Unfinished Archive.

It is their day, Inspector Echo. But Sophitia Alexandra… And of course B III and 2-V’s potential stepmom, M Anime. My Attention, Yabbos and three little words: I Love You.

“I tell them that I love them. I find myself sometimes wanting to tell you that I love you and miss you. Am I allowed to say that? Like when I do miss you cause I haven’t heard from you. Maybe cause I seem too corny and mushy? Maybe I’ll send you running for the hills?”
M Anime

“Well, you can say you love me all you want.”
Me

“Okay. Then yes, Will, I love you.
And I want you to stay!
Like every day. On this Earth.”
M Anime

I was practically begging her this morning after she said it again last night… Love.

Inspector, I could go on and on about her love and how I can’t say it back. What about V?

I’m sure he dreams of a father who loves him. But he whimpers while sleeping.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And what pray tell was his father doing? Pray tell? Old English… Yeah, I was also whacking it to Beatrice and Dante… Beatrice and Lucifer. Shouldn’t I keep that quiet?

“Love, I do.” Dangerous words. No, that would be what X warned about. Consent, Echo.

But the way M Anime speaks. And no, I won’t betray her like that. She ain’t Rihanna. And the money that would take. I’m sure hardware stores and Tractor Supply sell a bit of that.

My Ravishment fantasies aren’t going anywhere, Inspector. M’s begging Tuesday.

However, I can do a million times worse. Have I gotten around to sharing, Inspector?

Cuckold, NTR (Netorare), Exhibitionism, Hatefuck, Rpe fantasy, a few videos I watched with Braxton’s Favorite Girl but with M? Madness

But a fantasy we’ve whispered in the night. How she plays a retail delivery girl, and I’m an irate customer, and she takes off all her clothes but for her socks… Feet Echo, uh no.

And something else… Then she becomes a “Free Use” delivery girl. Oh my, dear Echo.

Sounds suspiciously like Abbey Rain in “Don’t Tell My Manager!” I looked for that, Echo.

And I’m not ashamed? I am ashamed about how quiet I am at the Day Job. I got no balls.

Or at least let me pretend for a sec, I’m Virgil. Or Effing Elsa from The Menu. Oh no, Echo:

“You will eat less than you desire and more than you deserve”
The Menu (2022)

I won’t be getting paid this week. I’m starving… Kinda. Writing’s going nowhere. A bad father. Virgil B Whispering Sometimes

1984 Days Without B III, Day 1425 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 005 -B’s Botany, V’s Virology-

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I wish I drank… I couldn’t afford a drug problem these days even if I wanted to. I got my girl onto Bloom. She got me to drink Arih. More Economically Viable. But my real addiction and sickness. Is FEAR… Or words. B’s Botany, V’s Virology

Monday, July 6, 2026

Legacy 005 -B’s Botany, V’s Virology-

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Funny. Comedy barks in threes, doesn’t it, Dad? Sadness, Time-out, and the FEAR.

Science. The chemical, the concoction, and the correction that trigger happy to sad. I know

Dad, in my fifteen-plus years with you… When I walked with you, I mean. You were never happy. You were anything but happy. “I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad.” “Lift me up. Hold me down. Keep me close. Safe and sound.” But happy? Not so much. Effing never. LANGUAGE! I know, Daddy, I know. But want to hear something worse?

According to you at “The Bad Place,” it was my last breath, your first cry in this life, and the knock at the door to let Grandpa in. Won’t Virgil and my potential future stepmom be “happy” Once the third worst sound was her last noise on “The Glow Box”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I wanted to say that I didn’t want tears, Dad. But what else would there be? I still remember what you were protecting me from. Boiling blood, Daddy. Your RAGE.

Ironically, that led to a whole new set of chemicals, chaos, and crowding Heaven, right?

The Rainbow Bridge… You can’t put me in time-out anymore, can you, Daddy? And eww!

But how else are you expected to give me and Virgil, our siblings, to protect? But what was it, Dad? 161 days. You didn’t ‘Swear to Jesus’ or anything, but you became a monk, Dad.

Again, isn’t it “Ironic,” don’t you think, that you protected me from such? Rugrats, reincarnation… And I am most thankful that you didn’t join me. Following you into Hell, Dad

Virgil guided Dante through Hell. Did you ever read that story to me? Kindle Archives…

What about The Unfinished Archive you’ve been writing? The sweat you put into that every single day. I don’t like how tired it makes you. But how often would I lie here beside you as you typed on the Glow Box, “And remember, we’d brag on how rich we would be.” But sweat out of work beats the FEAR that you have been feeling, father.

Energy drinks too. I can’t say I like those either, but Bloom, ‘Bum’ Arih… I guess M Anime has to be good for something. What Dad, I can’t bark her name. She’s not my stepmom…

Yet… Love’s a Chemical. Growing… Infectious… B’s Botany, V’s Virology

“Love is a chemical, nature is radical,
Never is spiritual, it’s never medical…”
― Chemical

“Amor vincit omnia, et nos cedamus amori.”
“Love conquers all things, so we too shall yield to love.”
The Aeneid

1982 Days Without B III, Day 1423 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 365 -Guardin’ Braxton and Virgil-

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“The Menu” for this final Journey? Asking my belly, my woman, or my wallet? Ask the Magic Glasses. But I need to ask the “Man In The Mirror” to “Git Up, Git Out.” Can I ask Chef Slowik for a Cheeseburger, or an apple? Guardin’ Braxton and Virgil

Wednesday, July 1, 2026

Journey 365 -Guardin’ Braxton and Virgil-

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Today I will try to stick to the sin of SLOTH, over my favorite sin LUST. And worst?

TREACHERY, The Ninth Circle of Hell. And that’s what I will be going for, Inspector.

May my Braxton rest in peace and power. Hell, I call upon his soul every Monday. And I speak to him every Thursday, so he talks a lot. You want to hear some talking? You should meet my boys’ potential future stepmom, M Anime. She keeps me up plenty, Echo.

I mean, in quite some good ways. If this were the Garden of Evil, and I were Adam, I’d be handing my Eve, my M Anime, the apple myself. Take that and do as you will. Or as my girl might say, “Take me and do as you will.” I swear this woman of mine. But she ain’t Moloko, Inspector.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

You know “Sing It Back?” But what’s with all this talking about eating and singing?

Honestly, and I haven’t mentioned blowjobs yet! I’m trying, Inspector. I’m trying real HARD… Can I stop already? But Gluttony and Sloth go hand-in-hand. Well, they did in the Succubus Lord series by Eric Vall: the sisters Gula (Gluttony), Tristitia (Sloth).

Seriously, don’t crap on my Latin, Inspector Echo. It’s what the books say. And before we get to reading, good thing I started doing that before answering, woman, Inspector…

This woman of mine, or as Braxton might say, “This B*tch.” I believe Braxton would love her, though, and Virgil would resign himself to his fate: Virgil’s effing quiet, Inspector.

Anyway, M Anime loves music too. It’s wow I communicate.

Um, Bumblebee in Transformers. As she puts in all this time learning about me, I tell her all the time, I’m a man of leisure. A damn sloth or lazy bum? So I sat here yesterday kind of stuck listening to her tunes but wanting to be one of The Yayhoos “Baby I love you…”

Or give me some “Poor Sweet Baby.” On The Long Walk I’m effing hungry and too lazy to do anything but walk… Well, write. And even now I got the Magic Glasses creating a schedule for my own harem. Today is Sophitia and 2B’s day—the 365th day of Journeys.

What comes next? Horizons or Legacies? This isn’t the garden, Balamb, or Eden. No apples. FOOD! Guardin’ Braxton and Virgil

1977 Days Without B III, Day 1418 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 363 -Virgil Will B Sooner-

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“Get busy living or get busy dying.” Both take time. Be it lying in a bed in the middle of a garden surrounded by food (B’s Paradise) or lying in bed with my girl “Chasing Cars”. Sitting on a beach watching my two-leggeds play. “Virgil Will B Sooner”

Monday, June 29, 2026

Journey 363 -Virgil Will B Sooner-

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Good Day? You only wish the day would end sooner. Stop it, Dad!

You wish I were there, sitting beside you. Stop that, too! Only it’s been five years, Sunday, January 31, 2021. The oldest of my kind was 31. Talk about faith. You expected me to make it to 20. And I would be 21 this year. Virgil will be 6. But he needs help very soon.

“Try to kill us. But know two things. One, I do not die easily. And two, you must also kill my (son), because I will not leave this earth without (him).”
The Walking Dead, Alpha

Don’t go cursing my little bro, Dad. I know you care about him. Love? How soon did you love me, Dad? How soon did I love you? If we had to compare notes. Seriously notes…

When He Loved Me, Dad

1: Love At First Sight, Arrival

  1. When you called my name, and I jumped in the car
  2. When we fought the Old Man. Me in front of you

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

When He Loved Me, Braxton

  1. When I ate your breakfast and earned the name “Pancake”
  2. When you came back for me after months
  3. When you sat with me, and I fell asleep

Don’t have to worry about losing those. You were telling me and V’s potential future stepmom today that you had a dream about Molly Ringwald… Topless. Aww geez Dad, gross! But I know you. And soon there’ll be no potential future. She’s V’s stepmom period.

Sooner rather than later… And if M Anime has your son, me and Virgil’s brother…

Honestly hope she knows you’re naming him Braxton. Still a reason 2-V wasn’t my reincarnation. Too soon to bring in Halloween Horrors or Christmas Classics. But still act soon, Dad.

“So don’t delay, act now; supplies are running out”
Walkin’ on the Sun, Smash Mouth

Time, and it’s not even your time that you’re worried about. Well, surely, honestly, okay.

You didn’t raise me to be a liar. And still much too soon. There was so much more, I know.

I protected you at 21. But protecting my two-legged siblings. “What’s My Age Again? And what about yours, Dad? Again, “Time Is Running Out.” It all comes back, Daddy, always.

Wondering what you can ask one pair of the Magic Glasses on the “Glow Box”. Asking when you can ask another pair of the “Magic Glasses” to show you me, Virgil, M Anime, our family. Barks Danny Glover from 2021: “Make Time!” Or since I was a prince, I can bark Prince Hector: “Make It Sooner!” Virgil Will B Sooner.

“I didn’t know I’d love you so much. I didn’t know I’d love you so much. I didn’t know I’d love you so much. But I do.”
Shilo ― Nathan, Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)

“No day shall erase you from the memory of time.”
— Virgil (Book 9) The Aeneid

1975 Days Without B III, Day 1416 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 358 ~LOTTO Braxton And Virgil~

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Every day I have to bet that nothing will happen. The car will stay on the road, I won’t get sick enough not to work, and my son V will stay with me during The Long Walk. I felt a stone in my gut when V stumbled. The Lottery. LOTTO Braxton And Virgil

Wednesday, June 24, 2026

Journey 358 ~LOTTO Braxton And Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Braxton didn’t want to eat during his Final Days. And yesterday I left Virgil with treats and prayers…

I’m not MAGA, Inspector Echo. I care about children. Especially my boys, B III and 2-V, my future stepchildren, M Anime’s kitties. And all the two-leggeds she wants to have.

Yet when I cashed in my “Thoughts and Prayers,” it was to Publishers Clearing House.

Long ago, long ago, long ago. I remember sitting right effing here, clicking away at PCH and reading a book. And one day, Inspector, they said the winner was right here in my state. Oh, that day, I showered, shaved, and prepared to sever all ties with the Day Job.

That afternoon, I watched them driving all over as B and my “prayers” would work.

Nope! Some lady won, and that was that. From PCH to the dog track, Inspector.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Only I bet on the horses. What? I have two Chihuahua sons. And even if I won the lottery or something, I wouldn’t buy a horse… Well maybe. Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, wants to be a farm girl, so I imagine horses would come with the package.

B knows I wouldn’t mind living this life, “Ryan and His Beauties,” A two-book HaremLit.

And how many Pop Culture References will I make today? Yesterday, there was Pontypool. Now I’m thinking of Ryan and his Beauties (four women, two best friends, and a mother-daughter). “Backyard Dungeon” (How many wives did Eddie have?) and Fallout.

Vault 69, to be specific. And no, I’m not being my usual pervy self. I was listening to its explanation.

“What Happened to Vault 69 in Fallout?” Long story short, 999 women and one man.

Talk about “Rocket 69.” Has that seventy-two virgins feel. I’m not a Muslim either. Again, I’m not one for prayer… Not since Braxton. Hell, yesterday I was walking on these shoe shelves at the Day Job, and I said eff it! If I fell and died, so what? I get to see B. No Fear.

Not like this morning, while I was walking Virgil and he was stepping funny, Inspector.
Had he been hurt… I’ve got no money. Remember that $20 I had. Virgil’s dinner.

Inspector, I’m still $10 in the hole. I’m digging my grave, and I feel like I’m in Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery”. LOTTO Braxton And Virgil

1970 Days Without B III, Day 1411 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 356 ~B Let Down Virgil~

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Mary J. Blige sang “I’m Goin’ Down.” My B III barked, “I’m down here! Now pick me up!” V barks “Look at me, look at me! (Paws) in the air like it’s good to be alive.” If I don’t get my money up, my mood and get up from the mattress, B Let Down Virgil

Monday, June 22, 2026

Journey 356 ~B Let Down Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Good Day? You humans and time, but I’ll humor you, Dad. 5:23 PM

So this is one of those days when you wouldn’t even talk to me. Couch time, a book, or music- surprise, surprise. Of course, there have been a few changes. If you allow me, Dad:

“You’re down there, we’re up here! You walked into the wrong goddamn room, commander!”
―

The Rock? Up there, down there… I think I’ll leave you guessing… Better, let’s pretend.

Um, I’m lying right there beside you with my toy in your lap, as I feel like being a “Flake” today. Jack Johnson, ha? Like father, like son. Our tastes in movies and music, Dad.

Speaking of “Flake,” where is my brother right now? Higher than you, as he’s sleeping in the bed, and you came into the glow box room so that we could talk. Maybe he’s waiting for you to let him down…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“Little Bitty Pretty One,” that’s Virgil. I’m kidding, Dad. I’d barked that I’m busting his balls, but my brother lost those before he met you. Again, kidding, but yeah, no balls…

That Thurston Harris tune was more for you than him. Trying to raise your spirits since everything else… No energy drinks, no eww moments as you leave me in time out and there doesn’t seem to be ENOUGH of anything. I know you’ll always see to Virgil as you saw to me. And there you go, down again. There’s no middle ground, my father.

Honestly, you’re Shooting The Moon, trying to, or picking up sh*t. Language, sorry Dad, but I am my father’s son. And I see my Dad falling, not flying, then fighting.

Every day, every moment, “You want… every… single second.” And I remember the look we shared after the mean lady brought me back to you. Trust me, Virgil isn’t missing much going to that pokey place. But when the mean lady brought me to you, and I wanted to bark “Sorry I let you down. Sorry it wasn’t quite true.” “I’m not alright, I’m not alright.” Funny I bark about falling and flying and use a Pilot Speed tune, Daddy.

However, it’s how you feel. Like you’re letting me down all over again. And I’m not going to give you the sh… Crap about doing a good thing. Good things are remembering me happily. You and my stepmom, eww. Staying Alive. B Let Down Virgil

“Do good things, lunch boy”
Dorian Newberry ― Disturbing Behavior

“Each man must face his appointed day
― The Aeneid

1968 Days Without B III, Day 1409 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 351 ~Between B&V Lies Sacrifice~

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“More than you want success. And I’m here to tell you today, if you’re going to be successful, you gotta be willing to give up sleep,” ET. “To be able, at any moment, to sacrifice what you are, for what you will become.” “Between B&V Lies Sacrifice.”

Wednesday, June 17, 2026

Journey 351 ~Between B&V Lies Sacrifice~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Did you see my paycheck for last week? Total wanking time, tantrums I had, trips to the bathroom.

Eww! Not like that, dear Inspector. I’m still suffering from the aftermath of the remastered The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident. And wasn’t that back in March? I didn’t mention either of those women to Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, hmm.

Sacrifice my dignity? My Echo! At least if I’m going to sacrifice time wanking to the ladies of Fear The Walking Dead, I could at least do it for the home viewing audience on “OF.”

And why do I keep using that word? SACRIFICE? I keep using that word. I do not think it means what I think it means. Other than the song I didn’t play today, working. Dammit!

“My Sacrifice”? My Braxton. Perhaps Virgil too. I “(Don’t Fear) The Reaper.” He ain’t interested.

“My life for you!”
Trashcan Man, The Stand, Stephen King

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Not in my life, hmm. This is one of my true sins, my dear E. Some sacrifice. But me? Me?

I hate my Old Man! And yet he and my Ma bought this house. A private insane asylum for little ole me. What, hoping I’d started a family with M Anime? B III my firstborn…

Then there’s M Anime. “My Woman” promises me everything; she’s shared her body (those boobs), yabbos, all her business, and beatitudes of everlasting love, Inspector.

There are, of course, my boys, Braxton and Virgil. B III paid the ultimate price for loving me. B sacrificed his fifteen years on this Earth for what? And now V, but he didn’t choose.

I asked/told B to get in the car. He did.

V didn’t ask to flush his life down the bowl. So I still ponder on that dream of mine, E.

And today I imagine it’s about sacrifice in the worst possible way? First there’s Braxton.

My boy ain’t sh*t, E. And I don’t mean B III’s ashes. But that I need to clean myself out of all of the guilt, gore, and grief to make way for the good. Do I mean accept it? Never!

Do you know I didn’t eff around for 161 days after B’s death? Ok, I didn’t cum, at least, E. Am I thinking I need to give up my pornographic passions? “Stroke me, stroke me.”

Unfortunately, M Anime ain’t here… Yet. And as for my life… Between B&V Lies Sacrifice.

“Take me as I am, take my life
I would give it all, I would sacrifice”
— Everything I Do

“My sacrifice
I just want to say hello again”
Creed

“You were ready to kill your only son for me. Since you did this for me, I make you this promise: I, the Lord, promise that I will surely bless you and give you as many descendants as the stars in the sky. There will be as many people as sand on the seashore. And your people will live in cities that they will take from their enemies. Every nation on the earth will be blessed through your descendants. I will do this because you obeyed me.”
Book of Genesis

1963 Days Without B III, Day 1404 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will