Episode 091 ~To The Positive Will~

They say a few drinks; well, I only need one, but maybe this is one more addiction, the misery, the depression, and when I do “party?” Honestly, it’s a responsibility to feel good but with this week? “To A Positive Will”

Sunday, September 30, 2018

Episode 091 ~To The Positive Will~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, well first don’t spend all your money on liquor and Indiana Gone would tell you that you’re not much of a drinker; one glass of wine honestly and you’ve had more than one some occasions. Hell you still have how many Root “Beers” and a bottle of wine but you do understand that it can make you brave, bold and even full of bliss or “filling” that but you’re “trying” not to feel that at the moment *sigh* Alexa Bliss but you actually blew it on another MILF, such is your disappointment.

Regret, disappointment, and our good friend FEAR and shouldn’t we also talk about laziness, after today you won’t, I mean, it’s done, it’s over this week and even this moment besides wasting today, making a mess and worrying about tomorrow what’s left. That’s the thing, there’s nothing, for the past few weeks, it’s been sort of like the opposite of Pandora’s Box, every negative thing comes in, I burn it away with lust and rage, and I don’t know if hope is a phoenix or that she’s fled. Sometimes I envy people who can anesthetize themselves with anything and everything, drugs, drinks, or destruction, isn’t that what I do every week with Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Failed
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

One freaking point, you’re alive, I survived, and I’m telling you to live on more than bloodlust, retail therapy, fapping, being love stoned, and whatever else there is, Will, my friend you’re dying. Fire can cook food but too much or not enough and there’s danger, it can warm your home or burn it down, it can light the way or reveal Hell itself and what is it that you choose this week. No like any addict you want a hit and then you wait for the end of the world, and yes I’m harsh because at this rate what else is there I ask? I mean if it’s not rage, not sex, for damn sure you’re not a decent person with Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Why even bother changing the list this week, some people tell the day by the bottle that they drink as Bon Jovi put it, you know the day by all the stuff that you won’t do today, tomorrow, two days from now but let “Okay” come over, and suddenly you’re up. That’s the moral of the story Will, find something that gets you up, other than a woman that you won’t touch, or some other vice; To A Positive Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To think I can go anywhere I want, and I would prefer to stay in bed instead of putting these hands to work but I did take a step in the right direction, and maybe I can make another one this week. “Will Take The Wheel.”

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, coming from someone with a “history” of numbers that’s rich; no pun intended or maybe it is because if it’s not the 1, 2, 3’s it’s A, B, C, and of all the words not to like, DISCOMBOBULATED looks good on you. Well I mean if this is what gets you up in the morning, though you could have gotten up earlier… one of these days will be a positive one, maybe that should be on the list, like a million dollars.

Even now you want to complain about tomorrow and the day after, what about the next, and you’re looking for that silver lining, but it always comes back to the numbers, the two movies you want to see against how much you worked last week for example. The gas in your car, plus the two wheels that need replacing, and the money in your wallet and every excuse that I want to throw at you currently; If I Were A Rich Man. Complaining about cash is a big sign of adulting, especially in America, when your only concern becomes about money and how I wish for you that it overwhelms even your lust; because words are going to make you money I believe and that means more days fighting against “other passions” Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Completed
4. I Will Eat Breakfast Every Day
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Church.” By Stylo Fantome
Completed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

Well look at that, I said positive, and already last week I broke 17.5 to a solid 34 F one foot in front of the other, but you have to move faster, not quite as “quickly” as you Fapping nowadays ha, but again you need the car. Hell, the words should be even harder considering the tragedies besetting you from all sides, but you will no longer apologize for things that you aren’t responsible for to anybody and no that doesn’t go on the list. This week you might even get three things done, even if the book; yeah more negativity, no state the facts the erotica book club wanted to read another m/m and a long one at that, did I say that… words; but these Six Impossible Things.
1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Again other things should make this list but the point is to maintain control of yourself but you must also know when to let loose like I didn’t, I want people in the ground and yet I remained silent because the lady at work lost her husband. Respect right, but who respects you, such a concept comes from those that find themselves in; no, those who seize control and that is what you must do so Will Take The Wheel.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 077 ~A Well Written Check~

Already I know this is not my best work, I’m sure the first time I wrote this out I said something profound and inspirational but no, as with my goal of having a million dollars I’m just signing my name and handing this off. A Well Written Check

Sunday, September 16, 2018

Episode 077 ~A Well Written Check~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, well to start I definitely would not be talking to you again; one conversation a week right and as much as I want to blame Grammarly, we can chalk this one up to human error, yeah such stupidity, so do I condemn you or me? Well if anything the point of the story is to save, as I said before *sigh* I knew you wouldn’t forget about the concept that I came up with last night which is merely by this time next year you are going to be a millionaire right?

That’s right, and here you are unable to save your work, to write you need to bleed, and these pages are the bandages, and here you are reopening the wound that you already cleansed, what more of a definition of self-harm is there? How about going to the day job you hate, how the General Manager would love to hear you say that, it would give him more of an excuse to fire you but keep thinking about this time, where will you be? I know I said something about Carl Johnson (CJ) and “hardcore gangster shit!” that kept me sane when dealing with Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest and I could use some tunes right now or more YouTube virus watching (actually watching fictional diseases), but you know Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Failed
4. I Will Eat A Bowl Of Cereal Every Day Before Leaving Here
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Completed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)
Failed

I know this is not what you needed to hear again, the same failures reiterated twice but hell considering how much time you wasted today… does Karma work when the only person you’re hurting is yourself? Yeah besides sleeping what did you do today, you said something else about “Stuff And Thangs” Pinterest boards this, edging away to actresses that, and that you need better role models other than zombie killers, and GTA gangsters to be sure. Too bad you still haven’t come up with an idea to make that million you’re going to make within eleven months and some change, though this only popped into my head last night with these Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
4. I Will Eat Breakfast Every Day
5. I Will Finish “Church.” By Stylo Fantome
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Yeah, this week is off to a fantastic start, but already you’re proving you’re lazy as how long did this conversation take before but you are experiencing firsthand what rage can do to a person and if you can keep this same fire about everything you do this week? Find a pretty girl to call you skeevy, talk about opening the wound again or find four black men to piss you off but The Man Right “Chea” is doing fine isn’t that right, with a 17.5 F someday maybe you’ll have, A Well Written Check.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 070 ~Will’s Wonderwall Written Withdrawal~

It has taken me all day to work on this and why is that, because I’m an addict needing a fix and no I don’t drink or smoke, and I graduated from DARE twice, but still here I am. Will’s Wonderwall Written Withdrawal.

Sunday, September 9, 2018

Episode 070 ~Will’s Wonderwall Written Withdrawal~

To Will:
Give Me One Reason other than my hands seriously need something to do, and you haven’t taken a nap all day, and soon you’ll be in so much pain so better to get this done right now. As if I got anything done this week, I know you’re feeling like a junkie, a comfortable one at that but still with all the worry and surviving and no I won’t make up excuses, if there was but one win, well you’re on the couch.

Things could always be worse, wouldn’t that be the title of your biography, you don’t look for the wins, hell you don’t even acknowledge the comfort zone, today’s word would be WANT. For damn sure it wasn’t WISH, and maybe we should stop talking about that if we aren’t going to talk about how to get that done, the who what, when, where, and why but of course you have that answer. Will to WORK but I’m banging my head against a brick wall there aren’t I, you know which head I’m talking about, but yeah this is my fault, alright these Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 005 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. I Will Survive “The Day”
Completed
4. I Will Not Get Arrested, Be Not So Fearful
Partial Completion, Did Not Get Arrested
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)
Failed

Women *sigh* not even a week in and already you’re ready to lose your mind and with all the books, and writing that you aren’t doing; if there is anything to celebrate it should be number four but living in fear might as well count as a failure. What did I say about words too, even getting our conversation out is a chore unto itself, and here I thought you were a better man than me, a year older but another number is the last thing you need. Wondering about everything in this life when handling the bare essentials is one more problem you have yet to face, already spent this week’s budget and what about your kid, and of course those Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
4. I Will Eat A Bowl Of Cereal Every Day Before Leaving Here
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)

When you build walls Will you must have a purpose and if it’s only to knock them down, why would you even begin; because whatever lies on the other side is worth the strength you must gain. That’s fear for you, isn’t it, hell life in general, the terror was your creation, but with everything else, well you know how that is but you must take some responsibility, yes more motivation Whatever It Takes Will.

Right now you’re scratching, hell damn near clawing; you want to get over there so badly that it hurts and I don’t know what to tell you friend, but this is Will’s Wonderwall Written Withdrawal.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 063 ~A Will For Monday~

Why do we only have the lesser of two evils, in fact, why do I applaud the fact that Monday rolls around and I’ll still be living like this because I know things may get worse, whether I do something or don’t. Not much motivation. “A Will For Monday”

Sunday, September 2, 2018

Episode 063 ~A Will For Monday~

To Will:
Give Me One Reason besides it is your turn, and I’ll tell you, you have a 99.9% guarantee that you will get up, take a shower, get dressed, arrive at work on time, do whatever you have to, return to the house, and walk the little boy. It’s after that when things get iffy though you will speak to Madam Justice. What I’m “trying” to explain is, what if you treated every day like a Monday, or any other day you “MUST” face.

Another reason you’re avoiding the mirror but the nose doesn’t lie, a chat amongst men is only one thing in several you must do today, take a shower, perhaps eat something that doesn’t come out of a box, despite what I went through to get it. How about treating today like you’re writing for NaNoWriMo; nobody is keeping tabs on you, nobody cares, but you have to earn the right to wear that writer’s t-shirt. It seems that today has become all about cleaning, which is why we are talking right now instead of two hours ago, emails, the car, procrastination, or success in progress, how about Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 012 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Failed
4. I Will Make It To The Library
Completed
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)
Failed

Will you be the one to break this streak of F’s, 17.5 to be exact and thank goodness I somehow found the strength to get off my lazy ass and get to the library right, a day before they started doing maintenance and that’s what you have to do on yourself. When’s the last time there was any good news? Hell, all I can say about last night is I drank hot chocolate instead of stuffing my face with a handful of marshmallows again. It doesn’t end there my friend, looks like you drew the short straw in fifty-two weeks and surviving this well you always do, but it will never get better and given today’s events, Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Survive “The Day”
4. I Will Not Get Arrested, Be Not So Fearful
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)

Pay particular attention to three and four. How you spend “The Day” I hope, what, that it is better than last year, that everyone forgets it, maybe that it never happened, which brings us to four, you didn’t do anything, and it cost you everything. Why can’t you order yourself to do what is necessary like the seven years wasted at the day job, Throw The Covers, over me because again it is your turn and besides The Day what could be worse than wanting to force the future my friend, A Will For Monday?

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 059 ~Iron Today, Will Tomorrow~

My head is made of stone today, and I wish I were a Tin Man because my flesh is killing me, after all, it is stronger than steel as was said in “Conan The Barbarian,” but everything feels so damn hard at the moment. “Iron Today, Will Tomorrow” *sigh*

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Episode 059 ~Iron Today, Will Tomorrow~

Forgive Me Echo,
Give Me One Reason to stop, other than the fact that it’s “set in stone,” but that’s the Internet for you, and wasn’t I lucky that it was in its infancy when I was in high school; yeah my age is both a crime and punishment. Talk about throwing dirt on my name, but will they remember me someday, what for I ask, well Inspector Echo, this covers a wide arrange of sins, probably more suited for Dirty Diana so I will tone it down today, hopefully.

I am not the man of steel, goes without saying, especially over the last few minutes… what I mean is I’m not the hero, I’m not exactly the villain either, or at least I hope not, but I’m not “made of stone.” Iron Will, an elemental metal, yes I spent most of my workday imagining different metals and stones; when you’re introducing yourself, well Will a.k.a. Iron Will, a.k.a. I Go Hard, and there we go back into that “adult situations” state of mind. Sex and violence, you see my writing takes care of my violent tendencies, for the most part, and the sex somewhat but I also want to own a brothel someday too.

Silence is golden, am I right but is that a sin, admitting a life goal, I want a lot in this world, and I want to say I’m going to earn it but I didn’t go to the library today to write and will I be working on my novel today? All that glitters is not gold, and that can be both a good thing and a bad thing, but as I often hear in my motivations, it’s good to be a dreamer but better to be a planner and a worker and I’m dreaming a lot lately. Too bad I’m awake when I do and when I’m in bed *sigh* it’s hard but I’m on Day 15 though I’m edging like crazy for sure.

Diamonds are forever, and that is what I need to be doing, pressure and time that’s what it takes with coal but how can I when I’m on fire, and I feel like at any moment there will be nothing left of me? Will you forgive me Inspector Echo for being so random today, for the sins I know that will remain and for attempting to dig myself up from beneath the stone, for being a “basic bro,” for wanting that Midas Touch, and for not appreciating what I am for the moment because I know, Iron Today, Will Tomorrow.

“The riddle… of steel.”

“Yes! You know what it is, don’t you boy? Shall I tell you? It’s the least I can do. Steel isn’t strong, boy, flesh is stronger! Look around you. There, on the rocks; a beautiful girl.” ― Conan the Barbarian (1982)

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 056 ~Will, Way, So Work~

To be honest, I need the work in all areas of my life, as I heard during my motivation kick, sleep is for those who are broke which explains so much these past few days. Will, Way, So Work, I have it all so won’t I?

Sunday, August 26, 2018

Episode 056 ~Will, Way, So Work~

To Will:
Give Me One Reason I wouldn’t make a good boss besides crippling social anxiety. Not expecting much of anything and more than a willingness to look at porn on top of everything else. No, I’m not going to beg you or even ask because when has that ever helped and especially with this week. You’re going to be unconscious. It’s going to be a hard one, yes harder than THAT; I’m afraid if that’s even possible my friend.

I would say I have no time for excuses, but I haven’t had time for anything else besides sleeping. When exactly is the energy boost from NO FAP supposed to kick in or maybe I haven’t been eating healthy again. It could be the pressure like I said, I figured this week was all settled, paying off the blog. And then the car trouble and having this thing about eating on the regular. It’s going to be close. Of course, sitting around waiting to fail is not right, and the thing is I don’t have to. A friend paid me some interest, and yet I’m sitting on the money. Yeah, one more thing to add to failing Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 012 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Failed
4. I Will Make It To The Library
Failed
5. I Will Read “Ven” by Ker Dukey
Failed
6. I Will Edit One Chapter A Day of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel) 11 ― 17
Failed

Another 17.5 F, everything going into keeping my pants on. Now is the part of the story that you must admit you have a problem. And all your friends have an intervention to address the issue, lucky you don’t have any. Not entirely accurate, one left some time ago, another is Somebody’s Baby. Still another girl tries her best, and a fourth idolizes the “Lolita” motif, that word… dirty right? Speaking of dirty, your hands, you’ll be working most of this week but what about writing? Do you think God up and abandoned his universe? No wonder Alice found another one, but you can’ even attempt these Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 012 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
4. I Will Make It To The Library
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)

Does it look like I’m going easy on you? There are factors to consider. Money, wearing out the tires with library trips when I saw hope and “potential.” How I hate that word because it means you should be doing more to make it disappear right? The man I hope you will be is starting to vanish, and you can’t let that happen, but I don’t know how to convince you. Hell Will I know you can wake up at the right time and there is so much I know.

Will you have to, you must, because it’s getting around that time, no, the time is always now, so what to do with the rest of the day? “Rule 158 I’m Will, There’s A Way” so Will, Way, So Work.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 019 ~No End Of Kindling~

I Made It, added more fuel to the fire, one more book down and even an additional chapter and the feeling I have now… it doesn’t compare to the humiliation I’ll endure tomorrow. Honestly, I would rather have people read my novel. “No End Of Kindling”

Friday, July 20, 2018

Episode 019 ~No End Of Kindling~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Give Me One Reason to take a break, two words “The End,” that I was looking forward to today and I’ll get there or even worse “To Be Continued” either way it goes, it’s going to take more than 925 words, but as the song says there ain’t no rest for the wicked. I haven’t even gotten close to selecting a new book to read because mine is turning out to be so… that’s the thing I want to say no words, but there are too many.

Not now, nor have I ever been one for the burning of books, well except for mine, again it goes into my whole, hurting myself before I hurt others mentality, you too Lady Sophia, the reason I’m talking to you so early. It’s not procrastination; it’s the fact that the last words of my book should happen when I’m up and about, not lying in bed, people deserve me at my best… did you hear me right? Something that shall never see the light of day which is why I spend eight to ten hours locked up in the library, talk about something I love and then the only thing I want to do with my novel is set it alight to keep myself warm, beats the day job always.

Tomorrow I expect I’ll be writing about my humiliations rather than writing something that is humiliating, one more reason I have to bury myself in fiction because the truth hurts plenty and nobody wants to know about that. One more novel that took me a year to write and here we are Lady Sophia, about three weeks into this year and like any one of my fictional books is this looking any better, but for now, there are plenty of words left with no sign of The End. A good story brings its writer back to life or more to the point, makes a writer immortal and with the love of readers warms for many a black night, I believe.

When it comes to my work though; I know I shouldn’t be so negative, if it gives me money to burn, and that will be over all too soon but my novel or novels, how did I not know I was writing a series, and the ideas keep on coming to be honest. So when people are lighting those torches, looking for things to throw onto my pyre, at the end of the day, not that of the story, they’ll be No End of Kindling.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 012 ~What’s On The Menu~

When you want (BLANK) as badly as you want to breathe, it’s then you’ll have, I can put any word or series of words, success, food, going back to the house, but writing is my life, only more so, and writers have weird dreams. What’s On The Menu?

Friday, July 13, 2018

Episode 012 ~What’s On The Menu~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Give Me One Reason to keep writing when people are hungry; I did all my shopping yesterday and you know I’ve been tightening my belt, and with the dog… well, you know how he feels about me not eating as usual? Not eating, not sleeping though there was a Hell of a dream last night with the few hours that I did get and I like ribs as much as the next guy but they weren’t two hundred dollars’ worth of good, and there I go, hungry.

Hungry for success, this entire week has been about writing, now you know how I am about my novel writing but the fact is to get it done, whatever it takes, don’t give up, don’t ever give up, focus, discipline, all buzzwords but I’ve been at the library from open to nearly close. You know I wrote about two pages I believe on turkeys taking over the world, and I’m not even that much a fan of turkeys, I mean Thanksgiving is alright, but I’m much more of a ham man honestly. So I wish I could tell you I wanted to figure out what my barbecue dream meant but I’m grinding, I’m hustling with five thousand words a day, every day I’m here, no wonder I’m dreaming about food now, but I’m still lacking.

Maybe I’m dreaming about a day that I won’t have a budget, I felt pretty sad about losing the money in my dream but someday I want to be like freaking “Brewster’s Millions” because you know how much I like spending it; haven’t gotten my PS4 or Detroit Become Human yet. It could be something like “Okay” teaching me that BBQ recipe and I didn’t kill us both with it, strangely enough, I have more faith in my cooking than I have in my writing, at least it’s proven fit for human consumption. How about the fact that I usually see ribs and such on the grill and the whole plot of my book as of late is all about fire, should I mention the fact that I don’t know how to grill, never have.

Other than shopping the other day I burned some money when I didn’t want to go into work next week on and off day, and I even screwed up getting out of doing the “Clean” thing at work. Can I not just be proud of the fact that I have gotten so far in my novel although I know I want to burn it, only I would probably screw up writing menus too, but for tonight What’s On The Menu?

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 005 ~Leave It To Printer~

Every day the writing gets worse, either on my screen, on my face, on my sleeve, wherever as they say to write all you need to do is bleed and considering the pain these past few days. “Leave It To The Printer”

Friday, July 6, 2018

Episode 005 ~Leave It To Printer~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Give Me One Reason to write it, one reason not to; aren’t I always asking for reasons to be a writer, in middle school other than that story about turkeys I had my head buried in a book, nowadays it’s earphones. I also say I can never speak my mind; I’m always laughing, smiling, making some random noise because everybody has a story and I don’t want to read it or maybe I’m illiterate when it comes to people even in writing.

Of course, the killers in my latest novels are reflections of myself but why is it that everyone in my life can either, see my humiliation and my fear, and they speak it so the whole damn world can hear. Two, they think they have the right to write out my story, my destiny in their fairytales like The Adjustment Bureau and since there is no chairperson to be had? Three they don’t want the story to end, no more like I’m a joke but once you have the punchline there is no more fun, and that leaves me here broken, and if anything, I should be working on my story and not contemplating contacting HR again, for hurt feelings.

Excuse me Lady Sophia for repeating past mistakes; I do take responsibility I do put myself out there and let my critics eat me alive in case you were wondering why I’m so into the undead, in horror; killers for the most part work alone, but I face an army. I already said before I write these stories about how I think people should be then I live and I’m wrong on all counts and so what I write becomes well… “STUPID” and even now I can’t tell you the whole story. No, I leave that to my fiction, and nobody sees that either, but I was listening to motivational speakers all morning, and I don’t fear failure, I dread returning to my day job every day and being everything they want me to be.

If anything shouldn’t that be enough to give the printer whatever remains of me, hell shouldn’t I buy a new printer anyway, as always I need to take my writing more seriously instead of worrying about the blog amongst other things. Paper makes plenty of noise Lady Sophia, and with plenty of green, I still don’t know how to look at people or what will be their next fairytale, but all I am, my next novel Leave It To Printer.

I Will Have No Fear