Tag: Love

Log 043 ~Will To Be Ordinary~

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I’m anything but ordinary which is terrible; I know you’re much more than average which is a real blessing, like “Beauty and the Beast,” both different but somebody wanted Belle, and I don’t want you to see me like this? Will To Be Ordinary

Tuesday, August 6, 2019

Log 043 ~Will To Be Ordinary~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and anything but ordinary. When I talked to a friend about my dream girl a.k.a you well you’re anything but typical. Open mouth and insert foot, right. Like something out of Firefly; Simon and Kaylee. Anyway as I was telling my friend, such and such, Nuclear Pop, Star Wars, Sci-Fi, Zombies. Hell at the moment I want you to tell me I didn’t dream up this or that. Better if you could help me find the note. Not that I’m making you my assistant or anything.

My wife, you’re my wife, that’s how I wake up every morning. Sort of like that dude who woke up from surgery and called his wife “eye candy.” Pet names all day, everything under the sun, my angel, my queen (minus the knife,) my miracle. Every day I don’t see you take off when I make jokes like that. How I’m only now getting into Game Of Thrones, and you’re still here. Honestly the first time ever I saw your face. One of these days I’ll stop speaking in songs, movies and TV, memes, and YouTube. I wonder how you would feel about that my love. Being a husband is still new to me, and I’m learning. I can’t say I’ve had many examples, one more reason we don’t visit most of my family. When we met, I’ll admit the last thing I was thinking about was gaining a wife.

I was thinking of Perfection, and that’s not right. In a way, I suppose I give myself more flaws because I wanted you so badly. Holding hands, dinner dates, meeting the folks, could only be my anxiety. The simple things, typical, shallow, only ordinary. Would you be one to survive a zombie apocalypse, a purge, some other world catastrophe? It always comes back to if I were the only boy, and you were the only girl. How I need something scarier than the man I am. One of the few times I didn’t stand by tradition asking your parents for your hand. Blessing, sure, and even that I can live without baby girl. That’s because we have blessings despite how I make money. Your beauty, your heart, the woman you are is more than ordinary. Ironic isn’t it that I want to be ordinary somehow.

Love shouldn’t be, why have the Will To Be Ordinary.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 038 ~Will Has Stress Balls~

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Where is my fidget cube when I need it and other than the shower my kid gives me no private time and unfortunately I can carry my phone into the bathroom, and last night I got a good night’s sleep for one reason? Will Has Stress Balls.

Thursday, August 8, 2019

Log 038 ~Will Has Stress Balls~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now but also a CREEP. Mind your tongue; I’m not a stalker, Mr. Trump, or any other type of criminal. I’m a dominant, a sadist, and someone who doesn’t handle stress well. Last night was the perfect example, skeevy as the “Basic Bitch” would say. Hell, I didn’t go to bed because I was satisfied. I was hoping I finally scared myself to death. The reason; Facebook and accidentally clicking on a picture from a year ago. Pretty girls have blocked me for less; words, Pokemon.

I’m in a lovey-dovey mood and not a sexual one, which leads me to Alita: Battle Angel. “I’ll give you my heart,” I’ll add that to the things a girl could say to me. Don’t worry, we’ll get to breasts but to have a girl’s heart. A woman’s I should say WHAT’S MY AGE AGAIN? Why the 90’s early 2000’s kick; music was better, huh? I like girls that have brains. Don’t I always say every Saturday, two to three hours of nuclear pop? It’s also a requisite she loves reading and decent movies. I was telling “Indiana Gone” that the other day. It’s not like I’m a genius, but hell the real shape of a heart. Didn’t I say I was a creep or creepy? Anyway, she must love my little ball of fluff, my son, you know. If dogs could talk not that he cares what I look up or click on: Thumbs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcEH7LJrOQc

Yeah, those and my fingers that had me staring at dirty titties last night. Well, that’s how it started, and then I was clicking, my mistake. Once again, I’m a slave to my phone. I’ll always be a boob guy Dirty Diana. A few hours ago it was all boobs, now to a girl with no boobs. Before my indiscretion, I was all about ass. Yesterday I said I can’t look people in the face. I know some great asses, though, two in particular. Well, three if you count the shower and please don’t. Last but not least, got the nub, got the nub; I’ll quit with the songs at some point. Pleasing women, once I get them in bed is the ultimate goal. I have no idea what I’m doing every day I’ll admit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_HemKz6yu0

Such is my stress, and I lost my fidget cube, but Will Has Stress Balls.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 036 ~Let’s Look Up Will~

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Now you know everything, and like Jon Snow, I know nothing, well usually but who I am and what I do, well most would run away but you’re here and in love, don’t they say that conquers all, including my fear. “Let’s Look Up Will” or not

Tuesday, August 6, 2019

Log 036 ~Let’s Look Up Will~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but SPOILER ALERT I’m not perfect. It’s no secret I’m a writer, but I find my words lacking when it comes to you. Angel, queen, goddess, should I stick with beautiful? I place you so high because you could never let me down. Hell, I never would have believed you would fall for me baby girl. How about the fact that I go so low hoping you’ll never see everything? I would say I’m an open book, but then like a couple of days ago I fear everyone knows too much.

You know like I’m some Erotic novel that needs that HEA disclaimer. With other people, well, I’ve lost friends and family. Now you and me, I need to know that there is a happy ending. In this day and age, I would be surprised if you hadn’t looked me up before we were together. I’m always one for research because I like the control. People can’t be too careful, but still, I wonder what makes you different. Other than being right here and now not running away. Deciding you’ll stay with me; how I wish my playlist were the only thing you’d find. That’s another reason I want my name in the public eye. Of course, you’re not one to be blinded by the glitz and the glamour. Why am I still hiding from you after all this time Love?

Higher aspirations, headphones, wanting to build Heaven for an angel? I still remember reading that somewhere, if you desire an angel, you have to aspire to build her such a home. It wouldn’t bother me if my “blood” read my books but you? Would I give you my phone right now; of course, but I fear you would run? I don’t want any secrets between us; only I don’t want to be alone either. If there is one word that defines me, it would be fear. Only it gets lost in everything else that I am. So why do I think I have the right to ask for everything that you are and may become. You became my wife, the mother of our children. I want to be a better man, but more so I only want to be yours. The man I am Here and Now my baby doll?

Greatest fan of your life but Let’s Look Up Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 031 ~Will Takes A Drive~

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Vroom, vroom, I’ve slept in my car before, but as far as “sleeping” with someone else well, I have a pretty good driving record considering some things and only ever got pulled over twice and for a black man that’s dangerous. Will Takes A Drive.

Thursday, August 1, 2019

Log 031 ~Will Takes A Drive~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now but not a car guy. If I earn enough money, I only want five cars. Mine, My Wife’s, Street Jet (Rob Dyrdek), Soccer Mom’s Minivan, and a Limo plus hot tub. My kids will get cars too, but time to talk about baby-making and not baby-raising Dirty Diana I hope.

At least, I want to can’t say I’m feeling my inner pimp at the moment. Yeah this coming from the guy that first thing in the morning looked up Kosame Dash. “Public Pickups” is fast becoming a favorite and to think weeks ago, it was “Oldje.” I still think about that woman in the Walmart parking lot, my chance at “Street Blowjobs.” The things that turn me on Dirty Diana hmm, innocence, plaid skirts, and in this moment cars. The voyeur side of me or the exhibitionist, having two cameras. I’m always worried about how people see me these days. One more reason I’m not all hot, at least in my pants. Besides getting mad at work, I lost another friend on Facebook. I know I always take things like this too hard; no not like that, Brainbuddy asked will I make August clean? Hell, it hasn’t been twenty-four hours, but I’m only doing research.

Speaking of my “learning,” I’ve looked over the motivations of women. I make that sound so deep, but let’s look at “Wolfenstein: Youngblood.” I like vulnerable women with the heart to fight, but there’s something about women that can kick ass. Jessie and Sophie Blazkowicz, Anya, Abby. Back in the day, I was all for Gabrielle, the Battling Bard of Potidaea. How about the fact I like women that are shapely enough to get down in a car? Refer to my list of five, which pretty much means all women. Getting back to my drives, yes I’m still a sadist, watching pain gets me going, inflicting it more so. If anything though I want a woman that makes me her drive, her focus. Give me Taylor Townsend stalking me any day, and I’d be down.

Don’t need a woman for that though I’m still down about plenty of things. One month to make a million dollars. My job leaves me scared. I have friends that are hurting something awful. I got two cars and nowhere to go. People run me so Will Takes A Drive.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 029 ~First Time For Will~

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My first time… falling in love, the second time, the third, hell I have kind of lost count and the first, last, and the only motif, well these days I’m just there, and I have better things to do than wait, but still, I dream. First Time For Will

Tuesday, July 30, 2019

Log 029 ~First Time For Will~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and what do you do with a million dollars? You know how I want to quote Office Space right now? Speaking of a movie about work, I don’t want to rant about that anymore today. Baby Girl, you’ll hear me go off every day, that is until the book is published. When I get the business up and running. How about the studio and everything else? Today I want to talk about, first, last, and only? As long as we’re not recounting that “first time” honestly my love let’s not okay.

Let’s think more like the time you and I first met. You know the saying about how time flies, well not here? I could give you all the clichés. I believe love is an acceptable form of suicide. How glad I am I didn’t say those words? Another saying is if I had to do t all over AGAIN. Look I like Lenny Kravitz as much as the next guy, but no I wouldn’t want to repeat this road. I’m glad I found you, but my life has been The Maze Runner. Yes, another movie reference? I like introducing you to movies, that’s my whole control thing again. You are stepping into my world as I step into yours, “Melancholia” one more film. I never saw it, but it’s about two planets colliding, and with you, it felt like nothing would ever be the same.

Everything with me is always to the extreme, I know. Somebody I can survive the zombie apocalypse with ha. You don’t laugh if I want to build an armory and a prepper stash. You’ll be the last person to know me, hell the only one. I want you to be the last person I will ever hurt. If you didn’t know how you wouldn’t be mine. My love, you could be the only love to make B III give up his spot. Might you be the last time I ever have to fear a woman? Well, I’m sure our daughters finding love, yeah that would scare the crap out of me at some point. Should I tell you about the first time, I knew I was in love. The start of an obsession. Multiple times I sent women heading for the hills? To have a woman say “I Do,” Hey Lover, First Time For Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 024 ~Will Come The Silence~

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I’m the strong silent type, well minus the strong I suppose, but I always get that I’m a great listener but whoever listens to me and there are so many things you can do in bed other than that thing. “Will Come The Silence” sometimes, but what’s next

Thursday, July 25, 2019

Log 024 ~Will Come The Silence~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now but shush. Now you know I’m one for moans, whimpers, and screams, yeah I’m no good with dialogue novel wise. Anyway, there is something to be known about the sound of silence. Now should I take the crass route and talk about women gagging. You know choosing a dick over-breathing. How about the use of sex toys though I buy women beautiful lingerie for a reason. There’s also the whole “stalker” angle sigh. Let me reiterate the fact that I’ve never done that, shocker right?

What I mean is I’ve never been one to watch a porno, naked women are everywhere. When I see a particular actress that I like, I have to find her video history. I’m hopeless sometimes in my way. Take, for example, Hayden Bell; she did Sweet Slurpee for Reality Kings. I know a few of her movies, but Street Blowjobs is my favorite. I like Whitley Wright from Prom Night and maybe one other film. My point is dominants study submissives. A one-night stand is one thing but to study a particular woman, to have a personal connection. Again I’m not talking hidden cameras or hiding that type of thing. It’s feeling something beyond language and hell what happens if I tell the truth? What about if I try to be nice? I hate playing Cyrano de Bergerac, not again.

I’ve said it often enough I love Saturday mornings lying in bed with a woman. You know I’ve got my 40’s and 50’s Nuclear Pop, the only time I listen anymore. How about reading a book in bed or on the loveseat? A trip to the library or the movies? You know I think that’s the ticket, intimacy you hear it in the silence. As the song goes, “but words sometimes get in the way.” It’s always spoiled things for me. I know that much is true. If I can’t talk, why should she right? Dirty Diana with my current body issues better I not talk at all. Still, there is the problem of communication, one more reason for a submissive. She learns to anticipate a dominant no words required. In a way that’s my novel but where does the time go these days wow.

Wanted to talk about The Beast and the Dead, and frozen vengeance but you know I Will Come The Silence.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 022 ~Love Will Sound Like~

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The only PERSON’s opinion that should mean anything is my own and possibly the girl I marry, should I also include my furbaby anyway, a girl said something today and let’s say my earphones will be on. Love Will Sound Like

Tuesday, July 23, 2019

Log 022 ~Love Will Sound Like~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but I don’t need a hearing aid. Old as I am, as loud as the world is, I should be grateful. One of my many motivations today stressed the importance of showing gratitude. I’m thankful my ears are healthy, hell perfect. I didn’t have to listen to A&W; I did get through my Meditation. One more afternoon of people showing me who they are, to be honest. You know what I usually don’t hear, those three little words. I love you.

It’s not that they don’t exist; it’s just that people don’t make them matter. When there was only me and B III, I said them all the time and meant them. Do you know what he said in return? He growled when he knew I was upset and looked for something to fight. My “father” and nephew stopped by, and he barked at the gate, wanting them to go away. Let’s not talk about my dad, and I don’t know any of my nephews enough to form an opinion. Triple B cries when I’m hurt and lies on the affected area. No wonder I thought a bug flew in my ear, too much toxicity at work. Yeah, people talk too damn much. I hear the clack of his nails on the floor, or the pitter-patter, a bath, and a nail grind are needed. He huffs, and he puffs, letting me know to get off my behind and do something anything.
Talk about having a purpose.

Now you tell me you love me, and again I am grateful. I feel undeserving sometimes I know, it even scares me a bit. You want to know when I hear it baby girl. Those Saturdays we lie here for two or three hours and imagine we’re the only two people left in the world. Please don’t let our kids be jocks? A cappuccino when I’m working or hot chocolate when I finish, coffee umm eww. Those times you sing to me because every day I’m losing my voice. How we watch some movie, I’ve seen a dozen times, and you’re surprised or pepper me with questions. Those nights we rant together about what they did to poor Prince Henry or Queen Daenerys. I can pretend I don’t hear some STUPID girl in my ear because I’m coming home to you. Love Will Sound Like

“You’re a good man,
(Will.)
And it doesn’t matter what
anyone else thinks but me.” movie Death Race – 2008

I Will Have No Fear

Log 017 ~Winning Willie By Daylight~

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It’s sad that I still remember the Sailor Moon theme song, I watched a teen react into an adult, a quite beautiful adult, that Snow White can’t be hot, well she can but not for my poetry I guess. “Winning Willie By Daylight.”

Thursday, July 18, 2019

Log 017 ~Winning Willie By Daylight~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but it isn’t from the fairytales. One of these days I’ll have to show you my “Winx Club” poetry from an LSD binge. I wish I were all sorts of high today, of course, I’m still reeling over yesterday. Nobody took down my comment though, and I’ve already moved on to making other women smile or offending them. One liked when I quoted Mariah Carey, another offered nudes for $200. She was one of those Teen/Adult React girls, legal now, but I’m still chasing boobs.

No wonder I’ve been fucking up with the porn lately. I’m going to have to report myself to Brainbuddy again thank you Mia Khalifah. “Graduating Summa Cum Loud” to be specific. Plaid skirts and glasses have always been my weakness. Always looking towards innocence as I carry so much guilt. I need something colorful, “Daddy’s Little Doll” series or “The Innocence Of Youth.” I know the difference of fantasy from reality Dirty Diana. I never figured I’d see one of those gamer girls naked. Still won’t, she had to get offers way “bigger” than mine, and no I’m not that crass. I go so nuts when I see Angie Varona all grown up of course.

How about growing up though and not offending any real women, Sailor Moon. Now I already said I wrote about the Winx Club, I knew W.I.T.C.H, but Sailor Moon sigh. My favorite was always Sailor Mercury, smart and sexy; I think I see a theme developing. I’ve never been one for bimbos, and you know my views on STUPIDITY. If it’s not innocence, it’s a woman that’s above it all. Again the woman dressed up as Snow White, I was worried over nothing? I’m still not sure, but I’ve never seen an ugly Disney Princess.

Let me go lower though; I’ve gotten back into Hentai. Kojin Taxi and Isaku mostly. From Kotomi Asakawa, Kyouko Sakai, Nanami Takeuchi, you know the Devil’s in the details. I wish I had all the time to research and enjoy, but The Lion King awaits. That’s something I never got into, Furries; okay, Lola Bunny. The world has become so much uglier these days. If it’s not the day job, well can I blame this on Trump? How about my novel, my eyes need something beautiful and pure? What things are Winning Willie By Daylight?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 015 ~Will Needs A Mirror~

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I don’t think a girl has ever asked me, “does this dress make me look fat” and I learned from Cory Matthews never to tell the “absolute” truth about everything, I guess it pays not to be a prize myself. “Will Needs A Mirror.”

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Log 015 ~Will Needs A Mirror~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, so why not several mirrors? The first time I even bought a mirror for myself was when I got my first place. I did a few weeks of basic training in the Navy after that my first retail job. People don’t like it when it looks like you don’t iron or covered in dog hair. If anything I felt that when I found you, the apocalypse would have begun. You know me baby-doll, considering my profession I’m all kinds of shallow.

It keeps going back to I don’t want anyone ever to feel like I did or still do? I was thinking about why I wanted to be a father, and while I do “copy” him, I want more money. The thing is I don’t want our children to ever hate themselves because of something I said. To feel so low that they never feel the need to look in a mirror. Heads hung low, minds so dark that they can’t see who they are ever. Looking in their wallets or hiding in words to say, “at least I’m not that evil.” I want pictures on the fridge, notes in lunch boxes and picnic baskets. I want their rooms decorated in all the things they love in life. So I’m back to the point of if I were a rich man. Well, I am, but what do I know about art, dancing, and can you plant black roses, The Hunger Games?

As the song “I just wanna look good for you,” and I should apologize if I’ve made you feel pressured like that My Love. I do love how you sing, though. Again back to my point because if it were up to me, I’d still be looking at blank walls. If it weren’t for you, my life goal would remain to stay here at home. You don’t keep beauty to yourself though; it should be to share with the world. One more reason I became a writer, and everything else fell into place. I don’t need mirrors if my children see me as well, is Superman too much to ask or Black Panther? If you see me and want me, everyone can go to Hell baby-girl. I’m praying I guess to see myself how you and the children see me when I feel so bad.

Who sells the best, my profession, Will Needs A Mirror.

“I’m not sure. But I always read that you had to be OK with yourself first before you could be OK with another person. Now I feel OK with you. But I don’t know how OK I was with myself before I met you, so maybe you’re making me OK.”

“You’re not that OK.”

“OK.”

  • Defending Your Life (1991)

I Will Have No Fear

Log 010 ~Man Made Monsters Will~

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The freaks come out at night as the song goes, so tonight I decided to stay in, though in the back of my mind there is a former brain surgeon taking advantage of a robot he built, though I’m more for “natural.” “Man Made Monsters Will”

Thursday, July 11, 2019

Log 010 ~Man Made Monsters Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now, which allows me to invest in Studio Fow. One of many interests, but as you know, I am one for the horror. Yes, my interest in Teratophilia is somewhat of a weird evolution. Considering I’ve written of the Dead, a Mold, and The Beast “ravishing” the living I’m only a man Dirty Diana, scary enough.

For women, it must be a regular house of horrors. This morning, of course, I caught myself looking in a mirror (shudders). Okay, not the direction I wanted to go in, but I have noticed a few gray hairs. One of the problems with getting old is I’ve seen too much; is that a problem? I was telling Indiana Gone about some old timer Disney memories, and back then I didn’t do fairytales. The thing is though I would DO Belle, I would tie up Elsa and fuck Anna. Am I sure I’m not a masochist torturing myself? I always liked the idea of Slave Jasmine, and I can continue. I’ve recounted the story enough that the first time I saw porn, I remember it was Hentai, Princess Ayeka naked. A return to innocence, hasn’t that always been my thing?

I’ve read the stories of guys hitting on Disney princesses in the park. Hell, there was that episode of TBBT where the girls dressed up as those fairytale pinups. Dangerous thoughts I know men transformed with primal lust. Only women have sought the fountain of youth more than any man. As for me, I only look forward when it comes to some dystopian society or hell I can go for aliens. It might seem strange how I write about women, and the idea of ordinary men being with them is a bit saddening. Plenty of books go along about healthy relationships. Others show the alpha male dynamic. Then you have either the older woman or the vulnerable young virgin. In my story, you have a man that rewrites DNA, a self-made prophet, and The Beast.

Monsters always get the girls, do you wonder why that is Dirty Diana? Yesterday I talked about what some have made me out to be, and you know how I hate to disappoint a pretty face. I know today hasn’t been so sexy but even my many monsters, these Tentacles need a day off. Loving My Man Made Monsters Will.

I Will Have No Fear