Tag: Obsession

Gospel 305 ~B III, B IV~

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To say B III IS a good dog is the underestimate of the Millennium. Braxton Is the greatest son ever, and I can never be free of such love. Only what can a man do before such hate? I don’t want to hate but the Day Job SIGH. B III, B IV

Sunday, May 2, 2021

Gospel 305 ~B III, B IV~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you might be too someday if you do like I did last night… just say no?

Being free of certain HABITS. You’re still HURT over Braxton, and that won’t be going away anytime soon. I think I brought it up some time yesterday that it’s been officially three months without him. You haven’t said no to the DENIAL or the ANGER… HATE. Being free of such love, but as Sade sings, this is No Ordinary Love. As Edmond Dantès learned, he could not escape such love. THEY say if only we could love as Braxton loves you. People though… I swear, we have mastered hate. If any consolation, you hate THEM. Being free of hating the ASM, the gemstone bitch, the spectacled spectator. Well, that’s not happening. You might get fired soon. But you didn’t harm yourself or Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Melody In Lingerie by Imogen Linn
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 121 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 128) No Fap
  5. I WILL Cut The Lawn This Week
    Partial
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Before you give me a pat on the back for now having two completions, two utter failures, and two partials. What is this Japan (tentacles)? Um, keep being a monk, my friend. It’s “easier.” As I said last night, I did no harm, meaning giving more money away for… stuff. Before you start crying again as I did when I realized what bills were missing. Of course, they’ve been missing for again three months. Braxton’s food budget, trips to the groomers, tick removal, his meds alone were $45 – $60. Online streaming and artists $71.
Before you give in to the nice girl from Twitter to Onlyfans. Or whatever loneliness-reducing gimmick being hocked today. Please remember what you owe Braxton and yourself, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Succubus Lord 14: Swimsuit Edition
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 128 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Cut The Backyard Lawn This Week
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

B III can’t help you through this week. As you woke up this morning, you asked for his strength. Hell, it’s the only reason you’re awake now after sleeping late. There’re more reasons to stay asleep than wake up. Living is easy with eyes closed, as the Beatles put it.
Misunderstanding all you see, you know from dreams to porn, to the Day Job. However, you see all too clearly. It’s those Republican tendencies. Rejecting the evidence of your eyes and ears like something out of 1984. People show you who they are; believe them. Braxton would see you as The World’s Greatest. R. Kelly… not someone you should be quoting these days. This week will be bad, but SIGH relax, B III, B IV

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Gospel 298 ~Behave In B’s Haven~

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I’ve compared Braxton to an angel, and I believe people are spelling GOD backward. In that case, I may be trouble if Braxton’s bedroom yesterday was any indication. For all I know, I was stumbling around in there like a zombie. “Behave In B’s Haven.”

Sunday, April 25, 2021

Gospel 298 ~Behave In B’s Haven~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but you can’t hire an exterminator or the Ghostbusters, at least not yet. And why would you?

As the song goes, Lord Give Me A Sign. I ran by one yesterday, and I’m ashamed to say I even stopped and looked. You’re in Hell, so at least have the good sense to suffer and not escape or seek salvation, solace, ha satisfaction. What would B III think of your excuses for alone time? That’s the thing, though; yesterday, I found out that I didn’t have to be… get it. The fact that you remember the five-month-old ball of fluff by the name of Buford and you’re sore about it. It could be everything else you know with Camp NaNoWriMo. Today’s the day. Are you still going to play Grim Reaper and bury a story you’ve neglected the world for? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Succubus Lord 13 by Eric Vall
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 114 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 121) No Fap
  5. I Am Not Bowing To The Day Job Under Threat Or Duress
    Completed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Hell, I am not a prophet, and neither are you. At least if I had put finish Camp NaNoWriMo on the list, you would be looking at four wins this AM. It would be almost supernatural. Which is now the whole point; A Hell escaping, undertaker, imagining some Godhood. There’s pride again, and do you think anything you write today will be worth it. All the stories I would write, right here while promising Braxton a better life. And he waited so patiently for me to finish. He still does, only he’s even quieter these days, of so I thought. Don’t jinx yourself. Last week sucked, and this week SIGH, I do not envy you other than again finishing Camp NaNoWriMo. But, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Melody In Lingerie by Imogen Linn
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 121 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Cut The Lawn This Week
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

What will you do with yourself? Being that an Ordinary Human is the worse type of a monster. You got plumbing to repair (snickers). And you might even get around to mowing the lawn or whatever you do with a weed whacker. Neighbors haven’t knocked. If yesterday is any indication, you’re being haunted by Braxton. I found many of his toys strewn all over the place in his room, and to be honest, it frightened me a little bit. Either I’m more out of it than I realized, or it was a rat. Yeah, a rat that doesn’t eat the dry food and treats or even messes up the table. You just remember to behave; work sucks, I know, sadly. Please Behave In B’s Haven

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Gospel 291 ~Bye The Letter B~

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B wasn’t an attack dog. To some, he was an angel, even when he was barking up a storm. To me, B III was a god. When you see the ending of one such as him, you no longer fear what men may do. Bye The Letter B I still must face the bullying of men

Sunday, April 18, 2021

Gospel 291 ~Bye The Letter B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but this week you might struggle. It’s not fear. Hope for the best; prepare for the worst.

You mean no insult to the warriors of the past, but shall you write a letter? A letter that says, if anything, the basics. I love you, I tried, I’m sorry; all the things I said to Braxton as I signed his life away. I signed my own death sentence, and I become different weekly. That’s why I say hello to you, and you could be saying goodbye to the Day Job. I find that even though Braxton is no longer here, I have no courage to lend, neither hope nor a word of peace. I don’t look a thing like Jesus. Jesus needed those three days getting War Ready.
I spent all of yesterday in bed, doing my 5000 words, denying Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Katie: A Novella by Mo Ibrahim
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 107 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 114) No Fap
  5. I Am Getting In Touch With Someone About A B III Tattoo
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Now, who am I to tell you anything? I failed yet again. Listen to me, please… the ASM is a bully, and you are not afraid, but nevertheless, I ask you, stand strong and courageous. He’s the asshole like so many in high school. He’s like those bitches at Wendy’s or Hardee’s. He’s like your Old Man. For all I know, this stand may not come this week at all. What would Braxton Do? He would bark, bite, be driven under the bed, but he would return. He lasted fifteen years, a month shy of his sixteenth birthday. One decade… Believe me when I say that it’s time to grow up. From lousy report cards, teachers not calling your name, oh yeah, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Succubus Lord 13 by Eric Vall
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 114 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I Am Not Bowing To The Day Job Under Threat Or Duress
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

I won’t hold my breath on most of these things, you know. Your war paint won’t stay on because of all your tears. After what happened to B III, the idea of pain… who needs more? I could search for a few of the greatest speeches and prayers. My offering:

“I will eternally ask your forgiveness, my son, I the father who failed you. Yet now I ask you, my good puppy, to hear me. I ask for the courage you showed against all who would do us harm. I plead for your wisdom, your good decisions. I wish for your comfort B, here, in my most desperate hours. Let me be the man you believed in no matter what.”

Prayers. Bye The Letter B

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Gospel 284 ~B Eager As Ever~

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When I was a kid (ha-ha), the Book Fair was, well, my second favorite thing. Dogs were first. And now, being an adult (funny) with only the memory of my son and m library mostly digital… it’s rare when anything good comes to the door. B Eager As Ever

Sunday, April 11, 2021

Gospel 284 ~B Eager As Ever~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you’re still tired, hoping you’ll be a better man, but you’re “home,” so yeah, Braxton’s life.

Ever so grateful for his. You can’t say that enough. It’s official or will be around 4:00 PM. Braxton has been gone 70 days or 10 weeks, does two months, and some change suit you better. I was once annoyed by how people talked about their newborns. You want to treasure every single breath, right? Every Day Is Exactly The Same as the song goes. With all the routines that will be keeping you alive, I’m sure you’ll be fighting the urge to live exactly that. I’m sorry that I failed you in that idea. Again you’re living as B III, living for him. Should I give the spiel or sing He Lives In You? Enormous, hopes, wishes, and dreams but not Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Succubus Lord 12 by Eric Vall
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 100 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 107) No Fap
  5. I Am Getting In Touch With Someone About A B III Tattoo
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Enemies that I suppose you’ll avoid well, four of them at least. Are you going to blame Camp NaNoWriMo? You’d never blame Braxton but that Day Job of yours, and then what are you doing to change the situation? Yeah, I know you’re getting started, 5:00 AM, damn fucking world. Egregious, isn’t it? And I’m not only talking about your language. I’ve been thinking about all the lessons that B taught. It’s like when he was here, I didn’t know it, but I had it all. Now you have enough. Becoming a Billionaire seems to be getting further and further away, like 5000 words, ha. Energy, peace, and I’m not Whitney Houston or Hank Hill to wish you, LOVE. A curse of Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Katie: A Novella by Mo Ibrahim
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 107 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I Am Getting In Touch With Someone About A B III Tattoo
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Eking out a living is no way to live, and yet I ask you like those motivations you no longer play to be grateful. I’ll admit that even I was for a few minutes yesterday afternoon, so one is ready. Easy way to say this is. Be like B. You remember how he was with you would bring fries home, and he would be prepared to tear into them. Yesterday I received another book and read it on the counter. Enlightenment may not be the order of the day, but why choose fear, pain, and oh this world again. You could make that an Impossible Thing, like living without B. But find something… um good. Eagerness, like Braxton to stay. Please, B Eager As Ever.

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Gospel 277 ~Love, Madness, Lies Braxton~

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Last week I mentioned the caveman commercial, and this week it was the old “Obsession” Ad. Anything I focus on, you could say I became obsessed with. I was with Braxton, and then I grew aphetic and what happened next. “Love, Madness, Lies Braxton.”

Sunday, April 4, 2021

Gospel 277 ~Love, Madness, Lies Braxton~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I got “a king-size tub big enough for ten plus me,” like the song goes.

Ok, even if you or I had that much room, that’s the one place B III wouldn’t go. Not unless he was getting a bath (I paid groomers) or he was sick. So before you forget, are you even going to shower today and not in a procrastination sort of way? But who’s waiting now? Speaking of forgetfulness, you do know that today is Easter Sunday. Not that it matters to you not being a man of faith and all. Your last REAL prayers were for what? You could wax all poetic like the Christians, QAnon folk, the Republican party. A list of “um, well.” The only thing you have in common with them is a collection of excuses for losing. Yeah, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Innocents by Cathy Coote
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 093 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 100) No Fap
  5. I Am Cleaning Out The Refrigerator (Braxton’s Last Meal)
    Completed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Obsession, isn’t it? Well, it depends on what you choose to follow. For you, it’s Braxton, which is apparently unacceptable. You’re Chuckie, and Braxton was Melville… “I Remember Melville.” People follow the “living dead” all the time, especially today, right? It’s something you miss about Braxton. As there is no one, not family, not Indiana Gone, M Anime, or Grandma, that is here for you, every day. Now your actual Grandma said you were one for Pride. I mean, who the hell are you? To Braxton, you were the world. Now isn’t that a sobering thought to go from being a god to nothing at all? Yet you were the one who worshipped him, always trying to be better for him with Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading, Succubus Lord 12 by Eric Vall
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 100 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I Am Getting In Touch With Someone About A B III Tattoo
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Opioids aren’t raining from the sky for this type of pain you’re going through. When I was a boy, I would look for stuff to take the edge off. No, I never did hard drugs but more excuses, distractions, anything to waste time. I swore that was Pokemon, Anime, Hentai. Only yesterday, while I was reading more Eric Vall, I got into more “forbidden texts.” Oh, what, reading about Succubi, Lilith, and the Circles of Hell aren’t enough? As you can see on Six Impossible Things, why haven’t you finished B’s collection yet? Too Much! Obsession kills, and yet you keep coming back. Without Braxton or your very own Taylor Townsend “The OC,” you’re alone.

Could say paranoid but “Find Me.” Love, Madness, Lies Braxton.

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Gospel 076 ~Will He Get Likes~

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Tell me about yourself? If only you knew how hard it is to come up with shows and movies. Yeah, I’m an open book, but I find out I’m not that likable when I’m being honest. Well, this is honest, but… “Will He Get Likes,” maybe with a special someone.

Tuesday, September 15, 2020

Gospel 076 ~Will He Get Likes~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that’s because people are obsessed with me. Well, more to the point, I hope you are. Of course, I’m thinking in a Taylor Townsend sort of way… The O.C. I saw every episode of that show. One more thing I love about you is that I don’t have to explain all my pop culture references. From the poem Give Me A Chance by Beau Sia’s. Yes, I am a bit of a pop-culture whore. To Star Wars. And to this day, I still remember sending my second best friend home for falling asleep. That’s love.

The things I watch and read to those I dare to dream would make anyone want to run away. That’s why I’m an open book with you, My Love, but I keep in mind the words of my “Big Sister.” “You can’t build a strip club next to a school,” she told me. Of course, that was before we penned the best story I’ve ever had my name on. Even that, I can never share with the whole wide world daily. Maybe that’s why I’m needy? Um, that’s no good but my taste in media…

The Walking Dead, Fear The Walking Dead, WWE, Z Nation, Cobra Kai, Colony, Secret Girlfriend, Into The Badlands, Solitary, A Million Little Things, Containment, Ridiculousness, Firefly, Dead Like Me, Rahxephon, Girlfriend Reviews, Star Trek Deep Space Nine, Survivors, V, Samurai Champloo, Cowboy Bebop, How I Met Your Mother, Blue Gender, Battle Royale, A Quiet Place, In Time, Pontypool, Everything Everything, They Live, The Belko Experiment, Hunger, Star Wars Franchise, Marvel Franchise, Young Adult Franchises, Passengers, Nerve, Blindness, Seeking A Friend For The End Of The World, Dogma, Daybreak, Fifty Shades Of Grey, The Purge Franchise, Snowpiercer Franchise, Apocalyptic, Horror, Sci-Fi

Yes, I’m still working on my profile page, but I shouldn’t bring my work home. You kind of like my work, hell you’ve read, watched, and been a part of it for the record. All because I’m worried people don’t like me. Nevertheless, you love me very much, and what age are the kids again… teenage years SIGH. I must sound like a fossil sometimes, an old dusty book on the shelf. Still, you pick me up, and I’m not sad only; it will be a long day of hope.

Hoping is exhausting, love’s peaceful, but Will He Get Likes?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 256 ~Incorrigible Wills, Insatiable Infatuations~

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Well, today, I wanted to sound intelligent; I should try that at work or better yet saying anything at all. Only all I have is three and four-letter words and not the nice kind, so I’m looking for grander. Incorrigible Wills, Insatiable Infatuations.

Friday, March 13, 2020

Log 256 ~Incorrigible Wills, Insatiable Infatuations~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so I can afford a massive dictionary and thesaurus. So ask me why I’m using such big words for other than listening to Dark Notes. How about reading The Gargoyle when I’m not falling asleep? Don’t take that as a criticism of Andrew Davidson’s Masterpiece. As the song goes, “work sucks, I know;” I’m exhausted, and the book tumbled down to my chest. To think I can go to sleep with this HUMMING. I saw some power company out and about today, but they didn’t fix whatever it is, my madness.

Like the stories, I’ve been paying attention to these many days. Of course, we could talk about my obsession with alliteration. Nope, to quote another song, “sex and horror are the new Gods.” Lady Sophia, you know that’s what I’m all about in life. On the FEAR front, do you want facts or fiction? If we choose fiction, let’s go with The Walking Dead. I told Indiana Gone I’m discombobulated and why? There is Eugene’s love life, The Battle For Hilltop, Judith’s first human kill. Fact is, here and now, everyone is talking about Coronavirus (COVID-19). Yes, I am still quite entertained, which I shouldn’t be right? Lady Sophia, this is my bread and butter; all my favorite stories are the end of the world. It depends in some instances if we talk about a single life knowing alteration forever.

“It is an awesome feeling to know you are about to change someone’s life forever.” ― Tomorrow, When the War Began (2010)

“whoever saves one life, save the world entire.”

“Lust is to the other passions what the nervous fluid is to life; it supports them all, lends strength to them all ambition, cruelty, avarice, revenge, are all founded on lust.” ― Marquis de Sade

Being a writer, isn’t that what I want to do somehow? I’m writing, or should I say not writing my story, which now needs a new name, but Cherry will still be front and center. Not like I am going to work on it tonight, why bother lying. Speaking of lying, I’m still not with my new infatuation. Where do I even begin; with Math? How about Wish giving me all sorts of ideas. Between the rain, reading Siren, and trying to drink more water. No wonder swimsuits keep popping up. More stuff for the submissive or dang it buying a submissive. I keep going with more books. As I said, I’m into Dark Notes, and in The Gargoyle, remember the Narrator lost some of his “parts.” So much stress. And I am barely hanging on with everything Lady Sophia.

The pain in my life is always labeled, To Be Continued. I’m trying to write out Incorrigible Wills, Insatiable Infatuations.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 148 ~An Eye For Will~

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Again not a word about NaNoWriMo, but I will finish on time; if only I loved writing as much as I love my job, yeah I hat the place, but I need it and speaking of which what about love, well I still have my dæmon. An Eye For Will.

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

Log 148 ~An Eye For Will~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that means I have eyes everywhere. First and foremost, I want to write books; you know that My Love. To this day, I still hate that saying about a picture being worth so many words. However, I want to study photography. I want to make movies. Before I met you, though, I loved other things, and I don’t want to offend you or creep you out. Too late, am I right? Only you know I believe the dead will walk the Earth. I know I was fearful of the Day Job. Of course, I love My Dæmon like pancakes always.

Now, as the song goes, I only have eyes for you. How about can’t take my eyes off of you, baby girl. I don’t lie My Love, again I’m not the type of man who can, I don’t know. Yes, I live in the moment, I can focus, when I look at you there’s only us. What I’m thinking is I want to love you, like I did my old job. Yes, I hate the Day Job, well the people but I was always there. Should I love you the way, My Dæmon loves his walks. When he missed one, I’ll admit I was frightened. Let me love you like I do my writing, which is every single day without fail. Oh, to love you like I do my DVR because I’m always saving every little thing important. You would have me love you like my pillow, because where am I right now, that’s sad.

Now another bit of faith I have is that love should be an obsession. With everything I love, I learn everything I can. When you understand something, it can’t hurt you ever. Today I was thinking about how I look at things. It reminded me of something out of “Prayers For Bobby.” When he was sad and miserable, his head hung low. His mother took it as a good thing. If he showed confidence or happiness, his mother was displeased. Yes, I know he was gay, not where I’m going with this, no worries. My point was when I was shy, scared, and sullen, people “loved” me ha. So I raised my head, I smiled, I studied, hope I wasn’t staring. Still, people got scared.

Only you’re not afraid ever, wow An Eye For Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 276 ~Will Up’s His Game~

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Too much helping myself but also too much self-help between, Spotify, Addiction beating apps, and books about the law of attraction, life is a game and keeping up the positivity I’m winning, I am, I AM. Will Up’s His Game more and more

Wednesday, April 3, 2019

Episode 276 ~Will Up’s His Game~

Forgive Me Echo,
How To Make One Million Dollars, become a life coach, a motivational speaker. Hell, why don’t I go all out and do what that lady says and become a preacher? I’ll have a YouTube channel like Tyrese Gibson. There is plenty of help just waiting out there.

If anything I’m finding that positive vibes can be as exhausting as the negative. So that’s why I don’t do self-help too often. Only isn’t that what this is, and my first sin today. Well beyond repeating myself is looking to God. You’ve heard this story before; I hate how my “OLDS” look at religion. Now I “worked” in a Christian bookstore for a bit. I mean I was heavy into it. I signed paperwork; I named characters for God. I read all I could. Nowadays I can’t stand the concept. Still, that isn’t to say I don’t take to heart a lesson here or there. A few spoken from Tupac Shakur. Another and another from Father Gabriel, The Walking Dead, The Battle For Alexandria.

When I couldn’t find God’s love and don’t get me started on his people, I wondered why no one ever loved me. Once again I turned to books about how to find love, making someone fall in love with you. There’s loving yourself only to the point that others could. Of course, this led me back into my poetry phase. I sound like a broken recording here, but it worked; for other guys. Lawmen are getting laid right now because of my work. It was like that time I did LSD and wrote nonstop about the “Winx Club.” In retrospect, it was somebody with a love of money. Even now I’m listening to a few motivations about that same thing. It keeps me way high.

Now that’s something else that all my motivations seem to have in common. You must become addicted, obsessed with self-improvement, with growth. Women talk a lot about not being good enough. Men can feel the same. Just now I read “We’re not porn addicts, we’re porn addicts in recovery.” Yes, thank you Miss Jessica Nigri and her Hermione Granger Cosplay. So yeah when it comes to my next sin besides not lasting a day of No Fap. You should have seen me on the first; I’m back on Brainbuddy. Now on a subscription basis, Patreon as well. No porn but a naked redhead am I right? Still reading The Secret and then I have to start back with my erotica reading group. You have to throw what you want out into the universe. At the day job, it’s always a million dollars Inspector. At the store, it’s a pretty girl.

It’s so hard staying up Inspector Echo I swear. Some things I have accomplished. I did three thousand words last night, five thousand the day before. I’m ahead in Camp NaNoWriMo so far. I even stood up to my General Manager. As for forgiveness, I’m still seeking help without, instead of looking within myself. I know I’m stronger than this, or I should be. So yes Will Up’s His Game.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 269 ~Was Will Calm Before~

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Calm or depression, I feel like I’m sinking and for some reason, I can’t remember how I kept my head above this muck, blood, sweat, and tears, or so THEY say; I hate the water, and that’s what keeps me kicking, did I sail once. “Was Will Calm Before”

Wednesday, March 27, 2019

Episode 269 ~Was Will Calm Before~

Forgive Me Echo,

How To Make One Million Dollars, I could start by cutting off Spotify, Patreon, Amazon Prime. However, strangely enough, I didn’t get into those things at the behest of anybody. Okay, so lovely boobs but let me continue. It was only last week I said I get into these things because of women. Now don’t get me started on obsession but when I get into something, writing still isn’t direct among them. I go full throttle, Nonstop.

When I was back in school, I fell into the Pokémon craze, who was I before? Now, who does my family prefer? The boy they made feel so worthless that he wasted hundreds on webcams? The one that’s so full of hate that he doesn’t speak to them. The one that spent more on Pokémon games, Gameboy, toys, more. Humiliations galore, having to walk back into that mall and return all that stuff. Now that was nothing compared to the Harmonic War, The Fall, The End Of The Rainbow, and dare I forget SWEETNESS. Girls are fucking Medusa (LANGUAGE). How about when I got into Alycia Debnam-Carey. In one of them, she was standing next to Alexa Nisenson. Then Almighty Pinterest sent some ominous warning. Days later I hear from my mom the police are in the area. I worry about everything there’s no doubt.

Fear, Worry, Guilt, but today is about obsession. Now I don’t even want to think about the Day Job. All the humiliations I have possibly endured inside my mind. Because today is Monday and I have to attempt to get out of a shift. Dammit (LANGUAGE) I don’t want to obsess about the Day Job. Only The Walking Dead 9×15 The Calm Before; you know how I’m addicted to The Lore of the Dead. Sunday I was researching any known gods of Flesh and The Carnival of Flesh from The Purge. Anyway and I’m not ashamed to admit this and why should I be. I ranted, raved, and raged, and shed a few tears for all those characters that died last night. Hell, I should become a reactor yeah, though it’s far too late or I’m pretty lazy, I know?

I take that show as gospel. It takes so much to disturb me, well media-wise. Undead heads on pikes have made my list. I even woke up “Indiana Gone” as I grieved. She knows of my obsession with the dead. Only like any drug, this was a bad trip. Inspector Echo, I apologize that I become obsessed with anything that I know doesn’t make me a loser. I ask forgiveness from five women; so far. It scares me Pinterest can think I’m depraved. I’m sorry for laziness and having my nightmares, Was Will Calm Before?

I Will Have No Fear