Saga 085 ~B’s Life, V, Pizza…~

I’m not Ben Affleck, Stephen Colbert, or Mia Goth, AKA “Pearl.” But can you guess which one I feel like presently? I wish I could write monologues like that. Or at least speak them out loud. Should I be grateful for this existence? B’s Life, V, Pizza

Saturday, September 24, 2022

Saga 085 ~B’s Life, V, Pizza…~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now. So why wouldn’t I want to live? With that kind of money, Life Is Good, Lunalesca…

I said last week I went to see the movie “Pearl.” That’s how I feel right now. But no ax. It’s the hopelessness Pearl felt when she gave that monologue to Mitsy. That’s writing. Fuck, that’s living… or maybe not. It’s existing… um, Lady Lu, there’s clarity. It’s knowing. And I wake up every day with this knowledge. My son is dead. For the past 42 days, I know a little fur baby I named Virgil has been sitting here wanting something. I don’t know. Love? Hell! I wish I could remember how Pearl said it. Much too early for that. And I’m still debating whether I’ll even go out today. Ha, with what money? While I’m not eloquent, to the Man In The Mirror…

Do you know how much I hate you? I swear, every night you close your eyes, that’s the best part of my day. I imagine that maybe, just maybe, you’ll never open them ever again. Second, to Braxton living, I pray for you dying. It wouldn’t even matter if everything came out as long as you didn’t have to hear about it. Being special, a star, some dom, a sadist. No, you’re just a depraved, disgusting, dirty old man. Wasting your time with delusions of grandeur. And every day, you say in your existence that things will get better. You’ll try again tomorrow. But you never do. Not on any E-Day. Not since Sunday, January 31, 2021. Or Tuesday, January 11, 2022. You should die.

Yeah, Lady Lunalesca, something like that will never make the movies. And again, I thought about going out, but there’s still pizza. Sigh, with what money? And the Day Job? Something else to look forward to? The fact that somebody might take that shoe shift? One more miracle that’s not happening. But the things I consider miracles, dear Lady Lu. Didn’t Pearl learn to be “happy” with what you have? I’m never happy with anything. The idea of “Another Day.” I said I would stop saying that because that indifference killed my best friend. Yes, bring on the waterworks for today. At least I’m not sweating from the heat. The A/C’s fixed, but I’m going to Hell for my betrayal, Treachery. B’s Life, V, Pizza…

601 Days Without B III, Day 042 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Episode 216 ~Its Ads Up, Will~

The price of growing up free, you can take that in so many different ways, but I believe somebody said too damn high, and that makes my pillow the softest, safest, and most sellable thing ever. Its Ads Up Will.

Saturday, February 2, 2019

Episode 216 ~Its Ads Up, Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, perhaps being a pillow spokesmodel, the poster boy for energy shots, a pretty good example of why we need contraceptives in the universe may be. A plum lesson on how pretty girls control guys or maybe not, on the one hand, I sang to a girl on the other the MILF in her sexy lingerie hasn’t talked me out of any more money but vacations in San Diego, I mean seriously?

Speaking of possibly warmer climates, doesn’t that make me more human, that I have to talk myself into saving me, I think I need a Super Bowl ad and even those have been getting worse by the year and you know I’m not a sports fan. If you went by my Spotify you might think, I’m the most motivated man in existence; I don’t remember the last thing I listened to other than speeches, oh yeah singing to “Indiana Gone” and even that was depressing. B III might like to write a letter to whoever makes my clothes, not sure if it’s cotton but he keeps finding ways to lie on me, hell by his standards I’m probably second only to the sun I think.

If you look at my Amazon, it’s quite clear that I’m a shut-in or at least a closed off person judging by my gaming collection and books; I’m a story oriented type of individual to be sure from Detroit: Become Human to Far Cry 5 and I’m still not reading Lolita as I should be. So when we look at my search history, and you would think I’m either highly educated, someone that needs to be locked up behind bars or in a white padded cell. Again look at all my searches in the book Lolita for stuff I don’t understand in French and then finding myself looking at words like TERATOPHILIA… my last novel. My Pinterest and my Instagram, well two more reasons I’m a dominant and inspiring brothel owner, but they don’t have business plans for those things.

My point is as I’m always saying is that everything I want is impossible, immoral, illegal, and insane so you can’t sell to me, you either want nothing or everything and you know where I fall into, and it’s too damn much. A few hours of my time, a few words, courage, a heart, having some balls, guts, then again yesterday I told Pizza Hut they were too high, $24.00 not to deliver a pizza and for damn sure I ain’t paying MORE to pick one up because everything in life, Its Ads Up, Will.

I Will Have No Fear