Lesson 294 ~The Ease of Jealousy~

So today wasn’t my day and tomorrow I might finally finish another novel; fifty-thousand words, while somebody else will write one sentence and the world will be all a “Twitter” won’t they, am I jealous? The Ease of Jealousy.

Saturday, April 21, 2018

Lesson 294 ~The Ease of Jealousy~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today, because I apparently overestimated people’s stupidity or maybe I underestimated the power of my laziness but I’m still working today even though I slacked off a bit yesterday a lot… the dog groomers, the bank, shopping, excuses. How often do I rely on people being terrible at their jobs just to make myself feel better, not that I could do such things, but I have a higher calling; these people sustain life but don’t writers and the other artists make it worth something, a reason Lady Lu.

“And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.” ― Dead Poets Society

Now it’s one thing to see all these authors, talented, tremendous, gifted, but what are the odds that I’ll meet Skye Warren, that one of my books will have me dancing with Jennifer Lawrence at some soiree, or I’ll end up on the big screen, well porn has awards. It’s when I see people I know; you remember the bitch that got me back into writing because I was so ashamed of myself “Look Who Grossed Up” and that was Two Hundred And Ninety-Four posts ago. I suppose she’s still writing, was even getting contacted by publishers and such and here I am, I’ve been writing most of my life, and okay I’m jealous, secure enough to admit that right?

Males shouldn’t be jealous that’s a female trait” ― Jay-Z

Anyway, so last night this extreme Christian girl I once worked with has started her blog. I peeked at it, and again those feelings of shame and regret crept up, and I probably won’t often visit just because as the song goes “I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.” Isn’t that easy, be respectful to women, but I’ll be jealous too, of her following, of all the likes and fans perhaps? All she will have to do is be herself *sigh*. Now I could argue the other way about being “green” it’s not easy making money, not if you’re me, it’s easy being “a sick pig” or skeeve as you know who called me; if she knew.

One mean word spawned thousands if not millions that were better left going unwritten though, someone told me recently she discovered my work, and it is nice to have a fan, you don’t know how much. It’s not easy getting up and exposing all my secrets, some I suppose, it’s not easy looking at my work and not blaming alcohol or drugs, yeah I’m bad at my craft, and that Lady Lu is what brings *sigh* The Ease of Jealousy.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 288 ~Getting Our Hands Dirty~

With these two hands I will make me a world, but God took seven days, I think a month will do for me and how many authors did “The Bible” have again, though tonight I’m going to watch other people make a mess. Getting Your Hands Dirty.

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Lesson 288 ~Getting Our Hands Dirty~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today, and neither is the dog on account of the rain, missing his outside time amongst other things, but the perfect excuse to stay inside and get your hands dirty don’t you think? You’ve been doing so for days, and certain aspects of your life have been suffering for it, but you’re halfway there; when did everything become about your novel but how about these six impossible things here:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 029 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 036 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Failed (*Starship Troopers Voice* Bugs)
3. I Will Announce My Book Camp NaNoWriMo
Partial Completion (No Title or Back Cover)
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
Failed
5. I Will Write A Review
Failed
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping Or Movies
Failed

To think once upon a time, you didn’t have to be told to go outside and play, when the girl next door was enough, and you were running away from kisses, or when you would write your poetry with your feet in the lake, ah the embrace of nature. Getting your hands dirty nowadays means what germy mess is on your phone and shall we dive into your files and see all your secrets; there’s no need since you are writing them out every single day in your novel. At least you’re not hugging the toilet throwing up the real trash you are making your body with so much unneeded medication, but what are the six impossible tasks this week:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 36 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Find Out What My Book Is About
4. I Will Complete 50% of VLAD
5. I Will Post A Review
6. I Will Write My Book

It takes blood, sweat, and tears, so maybe your hands aren’t meant to be clean because now is not the time for crying, as tired as you may be, as frustrated, what about anger, I swear the rage continues. People say there is supposed to be some amount of clarity or a burst of energy you know when you stop “Fapping” but when will that kick in or maybe it explains everything that’s going on in your story. I don’t have any words of encouragement, the last thing you need is anything of comfort, might make you fall asleep on the spot, if anything the madness and the hunger endures but today is going to be a good day, Survival Sunday at the movies right?

You’ve never been one for the glass is half full or half empty, no there’s only the glass and the drink, and it’s time to take your medicine, or maybe just figure out what the hell you’re drinking nowadays. In the end isn’t that what matters, but okay we know your heart, your soul, and mind are just one big insane asylum but you’re trying to fix that aren’t you and what about doctors, clean hands but making money you know Getting Your Hands Dirty.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 287 ~Fools and Their Eh~

Oops, I did it again, wasted my time, did my best instead of going out and maybe doing anything else that might honestly help me I mean any fool can write a book right. “Fools And Their Eh,” which I’d be lucky if I got that at all

Saturday, April 14, 2018

Lesson 287 ~Fools and Their Eh~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today, best case scenario I’m meh or eh and keeping an eh is a miracle these days but shouldn’t that be what a smile is for, a laugh, or just an honest day’s work. In this movie once, I think they said any fool could make an “A” but keeping it, maintaining it, that was the hard part, along with making it mean something, anything at all.

Maybe I should be talking to Lady Sophia about this, but my work as of late has been eh than A and I’m struggling as to why I even continue with it, even today I only want to hang on to my position with Camp NaNoWriMo. That’s the only top that I can see these days, that fifty-thousand-word total and what does it matter when you’re standing on a mountain of crap? Am I depressed you ask, if I am, I’m bleeding all over the pages which is a good sign don’t you think so Luna?

A which leads to B and I wind up with C, so on and so forth and even if I make it to Z, I would always be looking for the value of X, and I’m as lost now as I was back in those math classes of yesteryear. So what am I trying to say, what do I want to say, and like at work what should I say and that is something I can’t cater to, not anymore, never again though we both know if my “father” walked in here… People must have their A’s no doubt, it gives you value in this world, but no one ever understood I was trying to hang on to that eh most days and what did that get me, I’m Fonzie.

Am I saying I’m cool, am I still speaking of miracles, no I’m saying I get laughed at, I’m believing at some magic time what I am will be acceptable… maybe if we ever get “The First Purge.” Most days, speaking the truth I would like to feel a little bit better than this but I want to write those A’s and dot my I’s and cross my T’s and in the end, doesn’t this make me a fool honestly.

Can I live like this, can I maintain, endure and survive, what is it they say, Fools And Their Eh?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 283 ~Ok, I’m Up Now~

Which is more exhausting, writing a love story or trying to live one and doing both, I’m going to start having to write a bunch of reasons just to get out of bed, to be honest. “Ok, I’m Up Now” the question is what to do

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Lesson 283 ~Ok, I’m Up Now~

Dear Future Wife,
I Am Not Fine Today, not that it matters to my dog and any fur babies you bring along and a man needs all the love he can get these days, the best part of waking up I believe. You know I’m not a big coffee drinker, so I will take eight hours when I can get them; though being a husband and a father might mean having to make do with much less, again just how the world works right now.

The best way to a man’s heart is through his stomach rings right, and I do like bacon, just ask my parents, then again don’t that’s just something that tires me out but the food is good, bacon, pancakes, hash browns. Since my eyes will already lie shut, maybe a kiss or two would perk me up, a reason to look up as I’m usually asleep on my belly if I know I don’t have anything to do in the morning but just my luck… As the song goes love lift us up where we belong, have you been playing with my playlist; nothing gets me in the workday spirit as much as Easy Street.

What about when the work day’s through, maybe that’s why I spend so much time writing now so my other books will be few and far between; with all due respect to Skye Warren, I just can’t produce novels that fast. You might have to wake me up to write though, and that will be far easier when I get to quit the day job at some point, talk about motivation to get up. Love, you are plenty but how am I supposed to get anything done, if I was a sculptor, well then again I’ll find some other way to love you, my angel.

Though there is something to be kept about the classics; the two-legged children or six if we count all three of them, speaking of things to produce fast, because if I can tell when my dog is crying at two in the morning… If I know I can see your smile; that I can feel how you “Love Me Like You Do,” and everything that might require more than words. Who would need an alarm clock to wake-up any day?

As for this moment, I only want to cuddle with you and watch wrestling though it gets a bit boring at; Ok, I’m Up Now.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 281 ~Flat Of Your Back~

I went to work today but not the day job, but some real work that I’m missing “WrestleMania” for so the question becomes am I having fun yet, can I go and lie down now that the hard part is over. “Flat Of Your Back,” not again I don’t think

Sunday, April 08, 2018

Lesson 281 ~Flat Of Your Back~

“Next time, you will look up at me from the flat of your back.” ― from A Knight’s Tale (2001)

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today and in case you haven’t learned this by now “let me sleep on it” as the song goes isn’t truly helping anyone, well not you at least and maybe your bed is telling you something. Just another reason you can’t spend all day on your back, remember that brief bit of time when you wanted to build that dungeon of yours, “The Black Room” hell your bedroom has become one posh prison cell.

Now as they say, to everything there is a season; if you recall the reason you started sleeping on your back was just an acknowledgment of the work day tomorrow, ready to be “up and at ’em” but you’re no hero, wage slave. Speaking of old sayings how about “I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” you’re trying to be free of the mask, but you’re still pretending, still hoping that you won’t have to wake up tomorrow, the bed has taken a tomb’s form. Wouldn’t that explain a lot, like sleeping on bricks or stones which means your back should know what it’s like being against the wall? How about it’s difficult to use a laptop on your back though it keeps the “Fapping” to a minimum and how about those six impossible things you have:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 022 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 029 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Completed
3. I Will Not “Beg,” ”Cherry or Okay”
Partial Completion, Flirting (Cherry’s Lifestyle and Okay’s Tight Behind)
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
Failed 30%
5. I Will Start My New Book Today
Completed
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping
Partial Completion (“The Miracle Season” and “A Quiet Place”) two movie visits

You want to be on your back, and I can’t blame you, the world is a hard place, but you can make it less of one if you get off your back now and do the work. If lust is the key to everything then your bed, no your beds because you’re going to have The Black Room one day have to be comfortable and bouncy, don’t forget bouncy. You do enjoy when girls know how to ride if you’re interpreting “Pony” right, but that’s just one more reason to be on the flat of your back but what girls have been around here lately? What about being on the beach someday just resting, didn’t you get eight hours last night in bed, another excuse to want more sleep but you can’t write your six impossible things from the flat of your back you know?

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 029 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Announce My Book Camp NaNoWriMo
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
5. I Will Write A Review
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping Or Movies

If you want to lie down you should at least make it comfortable right and have some company that isn’t shedding 24/7, the dog’s hair does not know what to do in this weather but if it’s going to be cold, you should work. Will if it’s hot you should be sweating on your keyboard, not lying in bed on the Flat Of Your Back.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 280 ~I Missed Health Class~

When was the last time I wanted to get out of bed, not needed, not have to, not a challenge, no I only wanted to get up and live… is it too early for Christmas and can I be a kid again and go back to school. I Missed Health Class.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

Lesson 280 ~I Missed Health Class~

Hey Lady Luna,
I Am Not Fine Today because I missed health class, not all of it but probably more than Sex Ed, only this is America, so most kids missed that conversation, to be honest. What I mean there are plenty of things about health that I should have learned being an African-American and all. Personally, I never dreamed I’d get out of my teens and with diet, a brain only a zombie could love, the cops, let’s say things aren’t looking that good.

You may be wondering what brought all this up; maybe it’s the fact that I have wasted yet one more day of my life in bed. Except for walking my dog and nature’s call, I’ve been down for the count. What honestly baffles me is the concept that I have held my day job for almost seven years and in all that time, I’ve been late once, and I’ve called out once, been too sick to stay one time, and left early maybe twice. One of those times was for another job, and the other was for my writing career, and yet I’m not writing today, am I Lady Lu?

I wasn’t learning how to survive on Pop-Tarts and toast, maybe pizza and Rotisserie Chicken every night, am I complaining about food and money right now? Lady Lu they don’t talk about when you’re so depressed that your body follows suit and you’re weighed down by something as light as a blanket. How about cold, the weather has been like something out of “1408” hot, wet, frozen, wasteland but every work day I go out into that, and it’s killing me, but I have a billion excuses as to why I can’t do for me.

Speaking of killing, I haven’t had a run-in with the law for the longest time but from searching on Motherless.com to my Pinterest boards being knocked out, to Facebook collecting intel I could face arrest for a great many things. Am I still hung up on the Pinterest thing… tell that to the hundred or so episodes of General Hospital I have yet to watch and just might give up.

Health Class wants to teach you to stay strong and not just lie on your back which goes right back into how come there’s no sexual education at most schools. I’ll tell you what I haven’t learned today, how to deal with an ever-growing weakness pervading my body but hey Lu I Missed Health Class.

“There is only one rule that binds all people. One governing principle that defines every relationship on God’s green earth: The weak are meat, and the strong do eat.” Dr. Henry Goose, Cloud Atlas (2012)

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 274 ~Truest Sentence You Know~

A start but life gets in the way or in keeping one promise I might have to break another and that doesn’t sound right at all, just like over three thousand words isn’t the same as five thousand and what about tomorrow. “Truest Sentence You Know”

Sunday, April 1, 2018

Lesson 274 ~Truest Sentence You Know~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today will not do, even if it is the “truest” sentence for the moment and indeed that is no way to start a novel, no way to start a life, and both need to start today, right now. Again you are starting late today but if yesterday I could pull off five thousand words you can do the same thing and “Indiana Gone” has faith in you but talk about trust being sorely misplaced.

“Faith,” I wonder did they know that the Bible would take off the way it did; I suppose that’s more of a question for Lady Sophia. Hell, today should be all about Jesus, watching more “Far Cry 5,” do you remember the days of watching “The Ten Commandments” with the family. Talk about being greatly written but more importantly are your stories, maybe we should start thinking of them as goals that you wish to create and for those you will need more than a pen and a pad as Dr. Dre put it. Only isn’t that how it begins, with a pen and a pad, to nickels and dimes, to more paper and speaking of paper how about those six impossible things written down:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 015 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 022 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Completed
3. I Will Survive Inventory Tomorrow
Completed
4. I Will Finish Reading “Galahad Suns”
Completed
5. I Will Review Pacific Rim: Uprising
Completed
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Once
Completed

Now I feel like you should try harder, though it came down to the wire, I just finished writing the Pacific Rim: Uprising review yesterday and posting it, and I drove to Starbucks through a storm, and I didn’t have to, a test of courage. Isn’t writing something you know is going to suck a test of courage, you should probably think up a rule to stop putting yourself down if one does not already exist. That right there is the thing, you know the story that you WILL start today all that you need now is to get it out of you and stop making up a million excuses.

To be honest, though I know you’re at a lost for the next six impossible things though I can think of three right off the bat; another great story, The Walking Dead though I’ll share my disdain for Scott Gimple as well. Speaking of writers, I even did “Cherry” a solid reviewing her work, but it always comes back to me and now you, too busy trying to understand other people’s work what about yours, let’s start six impossible things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 022 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Not “Beg,” ”Cherry or Okay”
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD”
5. I Will Start My New Book Today
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping

So you know what you have to do, the ideas are already beginning to flow all you need do now is write them out, find the Truest Sentence You Know.

I Will Have No Fear

Yes, I’ll Have Cherry Pop

Brings a tear to your eye or a hammer to your heart but kind of the author to go first with all of her poetry as short as it was, but if you’re expecting here comes the sun, well Moses saw a burning bush. Yes, I’ll Have Cherry Pop

Maybe I should say I’ll have a “coke” before my southern roots finally disappear; I was born up north near Boston, and while I’m not a huge tea drinker and I’m further from England now, the books are still pretty good indeed. One such book is “Cherry” by Courtenay S. Gray, and this book of poetry is more than a cherry pop I would say this is a cherry bomb and no not like that.

Four out of five stars, with poems that range from sweet to tart, from a somewhat unknown writer, I found her by accident, to be honest, sort of like Moses seeing the burning bush, and I wonder how the rest of the world isn’t hearing her yet. Maybe she’s like the first cherry blossom blooming, and soon we’ll all be getting rained on by her words as I believe this is only her second book but speaking as a fellow writer we all start somewhere. I don’t know where, to begin with, her words though if I just had one word to define the theme of her work somehow, then that word would have to be… one guess *ahem* LOVE.

I can see that she loves her work but where there is love there is also hate, and I couldn’t begin to tell you the demographic for her work, you’ll leave it with your conflictions of love and hate. She’s also a person that seems to be crying out for love, the thing is, does she want it for herself or does it come as a desire for someone else, trading her broken heart for something new, because she may break your heart? Maybe it’s more of an affair; there’s even a poem called “The Two-Month Love Affair” but no worries you can finish the book in one sitting and isn’t the point of a one-night stand, okay maybe an hour to make sure all parties are honestly satisfied completely?

Yes, this book will fill you up, but I’m not sure if it’s with wisdom, the nostalgic feeling of a broken heart or a taste of Nightlock… The Hunger Games, anyone, okay a touch of poison. It will probably be a bit of all three and a whole lot more; with Cherry, you’ll feel like a kid again to a senior in no time flat.

I can’t begin to tell you which was my favorite poem of Courtenay’s though I found myself highlighting a few passages here and there that go from lovely to downright depressing and speaks about “Things That Make You Go Hmmm.” Now I’m still trying to find out who would be the right fit for this book, other than a guy who happens to be searching Goodreads or Twitter at just the right time of day.

The first line of “False Gods” which I found to be inspirational for some reason in a do you step or do you leap XBOX type of way, and who am I to say what the author was thinking, other than risk. Her work “The Last Farce” had me looking at her bio, she’s probably the youngest author I’ve read as she’s twenty years old and once you wrap your head around that a lot of her work makes a smidge more sense. “Blue Moon” and “Many Strings Attached” are tied for highlights and had me parodying Peter Griffin when he spoke of Lionel Richie’s “Hello”; you wonder who’s more in the wrong, the girl doing the chasing or the guys that she is chasing.

Speaking as someone who knows a few broken hearts I can relate, anyone with a broken heart will, and maybe that’s who should read this but don’t look for solace or consolation here, I think this is for the author alone. It doesn’t have that I’ve known such hurt and now here I am standing tall empowerment that most women are into nowadays, this is an acknowledgment of pain trying to escape in these words. Now, this probably will sound quite sexist but maybe this was written for her lovers to see and understand, she’s apparently angry in The Two Month Love Affair, but still in love, no question there.

If I were to tell you every poem that spoke to me, that carries such pain or longing, hell a few even turn me on, meaning I might be like one of the guys she talks about which is a bad thing but I still bought it didn’t I? Without a doubt, I’ll be buying her next one, and I still need to buy her first one, call me curious, was she already hurt then or will those be more sunshine and rainbows, highly doubtful.

Four out of five stars easy only two things keep it from greatness and should brevity count as one, that’s just me being a writer I guess, I could crank out a hundred poems and a book by tomorrow which is probably why this is so unheard of now. There is also let’s say the promise that the author makes to the reader, again I’m a guy, getting turned on doesn’t count but what about ladies who pick this up?

I keep going over in my head the purpose for this book if the author was trying to console herself or inform those who hurt her, why take it so far with this book; honestly I think that the world should see this and there are plenty of unknowns just waiting for their discovery. In 500 Days of Summer, I heard “to get over a girl turn her into literature,” and I guess it works with getting over a guy but the purpose of this is not to get over but to never be forgotten. Maybe it was only a test run, and if that’s the case, I might want my money back; yes, I enjoyed the book, but it was over so incredibly fast.

As for the promise that the author says this collection seeks to unearth your deepest desires; I see a tiny bit of the erotica I read but if that’s the case, what is it you’re looking for, young love but most women might be too mature for this. I can see a mom buying this for their daughter and every dad eyeing any potential suitors suspiciously but hoping this keeps their kids locked in their rooms. As the song goes how “it’s only love.” Will this author find it professionally or dare I say personally? In both cases, I do have high hopes for her, but he better be a million times smarter than whoever she’s writing about in this.

It’s worth the price but know what you’re getting into or look her up on Twitter, honestly, I hope I’m helping her because “Cherry” is so good, and now that song she’s my “Cherry Pie” is playing in my head, don’t I wish. She’s still a bit of a “new” author, and we all know another word for that don’t we, so I think maybe Yes, I’ll Have Cherry Pop.

Lesson 273 ~Tell Me A Story~

Today has been one productive day, I didn’t tell a story but a few reviews down and tomorrow the real work begins, and that’s when I will have to live up to these words, this promise I suppose. Tell Me A Story, soon and not soon enough

Saturday, March 31, 2018

Lesson 273 ~Tell Me A Story~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today but I prefer you not tell me a joke now and especially not tomorrow, and maybe it’s fate that I start writing my next novel tomorrow as the Christians will be all joy and rapture at what they say is “The Greatest Story Ever Told.” Hell how many people go to bed at night hoping that they never have to wake up, even Jesus didn’t make it through his thirties just saying.

Tell me an excuse and yes I’m going on and on about the Pinterest thing; the Internet is sort of like my medication, and I need the right balance of things to keep me centered if that makes any sense. I think I’m starting to understand the rage and the fear of the sound of silence, shouldn’t I know by now no one’s listening to me; it’s one thing when you see your world and they can’t but when your world hides from you… Losing an account has only happened once with Yahoo, but what have I said about defending your one inch of nothing?

Tell me is that why I write about sex all the time, I’m sure many would agree or was I the only one who found the one-inch thing dirty, like Big Ten Inch, or twelve steps. Honestly, I’m not in the mood. It doesn’t matter if I’m in the mood or not because tomorrow I will be writing, yes I need to repeat those words over and over, make them my mantra but it’s like I’m just hitting a brick wall. Hard as a rock honestly, I know, I’ll stop it, but I’m in a rush for no particular reason other than my made-up time constraints, and maybe I should turn my phone off, maybe?

Tell me something good, but before that, I’ll probably be stuck saying something stupid like I love you… what I tell the dog I love him every day, and I reveal to that girl “Cherry” other things, but I’m getting better with that. Today I should be yelling to the masses *crickets chirping*, *tumbleweed blows through*, okay I should ask myself how I feel about movies and books on the blog, writing something Lady Lu.

Tell me it’s been five thousand words already but no, I got a late start today which means I’ll be missing even more sleep but if I could sleep I’d say Tell Me A Story.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 249 ~Top Shelf, In Drawers~

It beats watching the idiot box, reading over writing, and better still to be living but wherever id I learn to do that; if you are what you eat, are you what you read as well, as R. Kelly put it, I’m a “Bad Man.” Top Shelf, In Drawers

Wednesday, March 7, 2018

Lesson 249 ~Top Shelf, In Drawers~

Forgive Me Echo,
I Am Not Afraid Anymore, humiliated, ashamed, highly questionable maybe only that’s the thing about the internet, dare I call it eternal, as an Egyptian pharaoh said, “So let it be written. So let it be done.” Does that make me scarier than most men or are women not that capable; is there another apology needed; what I mean is, I’ve read plenty of dark erotica, the darker, the better and they say I’m someone who could do these horrors, what do you think, am I able?

Is this a conversation better suited towards Dirty Diana or Lady Sophia; I’ll attend to my actual sins soon enough, but I was thinking about E. L. James who wrote Fifty Shades, and they don’t call her evil, they think she’s an idiot. I recently looked up a former book “Domination & Submission: The BDSM Relationship Handbook” and found out the author went to jail; hell I still gave the book three stars. How about Roosh V, besides being hated by a multitude of women, and being a blatant racist, I read two of his books too; what about all the dark fiction as well, on my Kindle and phone.

Now for my crimes, one I consider myself a writer and I have written some pretty disturbing things, my fiction, my inspirations, lately my comments and while I’m no damn good, I’m not a criminal but join the chorus… wait. They say don’t judge a book by its cover, and while some of these titles have tastefully clad women, the majority have shirtless men and let’s not forget the two I read that were gay and one which was more an orgy, thanks, Kit Rocha. To be perfectly honest I’m more embarrassed with the self-help titles and “The Manual: What Women Want and How to Give It to Them” which I consider the Bible somewhat and even had the nerve to read at work too.

So why bring all this up today, maybe because it’s the stuff I don’t write. Personally, I don’t own any leather, but I have a closet of outfits, I am not the bad guy, but I was thinking about the things I would say to a woman. If anything I must be forgiven Inspector Echo because I do not wish to play Cyrano de Bergerac any longer, I don’t plan on writing a love story, if I am a dominant, I’ll “Dom” my way, but my words are already on some top shelf, in drawers.

I Will Have No Fear