Tag: Lady Lu

Episode 293 ~The Willies Of Math~

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It still takes courage to smoke something that will do you no harm, all the legal drugs will kill you, but I don’t smoke usually, I don’t drink, I’m addicted to money, sex, and words in no particular order such are my fears — The Willies Of Math

Saturday, April 20, 2019

Episode 293 ~The Willies Of Math~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now; I want to count on this fact. On top of my organization skills when it comes to bath rugs, B III’s medication and boxes full of porn. Adding up dollar bills, excuse me please Homer Drool

This week I’m still into one porn in particular. Hot Juicy Teacher Volume 3: Science a.k.a. Onna Kyoushi, and Honoka Toudou. Sigh for the days when it was Desert Island Story X and the likes of Natsuno and Yuka. When did I get into PURPLE and BLUE hair? One part of my anatomy yearns for it. Even when I was watching Jewel Staite last night and of course she will appear in my novel as well. A scene alongside the Emo blogger mom. I’m never disappointed with the girls I select. Still, you know what didn’t get done last night? One thousand seven hundred words or at this rate about 1900 if I’m going to win Camp NaNoWriMo. Make no mistake Lady Lu I am going to win. Despite the premise of my being what it is, all me, every inch.

Only how do you tear down a wall of boobs. Be it those things I so adore about women or all the people. Last week I was surrounded by them, but I answered this question right? A million dollars will do the trick no problem. For that I need a good night’s sleep and what can I tell you there. I need to keep Mr. blue and purple; when’s the last time I looked at my balls, in my pants. Damn no wonder women dominate my chosen GENRE. Today though, I can’t afford to take two days off when it comes to the novel I have to get back on track. You know I didn’t reach my goal yesterday. Today I’m full, semi-rested, two things to be grateful. What about Happy 4/20, where’s Snoop Dogg?

So that’s three and legal somewhere, same as three of my characters who still breathe. Not that I killed off Genevieve and Ember. They both appear in other stories. Only three letters, little words. The usual number for a beginning or end. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, I’m greedy. I want FIFTY THOUSAND words. Little Willie wants TENTACLES (a dozen) one-person orgy, girls drools. Before September I’ll have my MILLION. So I have the courage for The Willies Of Math.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 286 ~All Night Wrong Will~

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Sleep is for those people who are broke, and I’m not, now or ever, though I want to break all the clocks in the house, I could use one from the novel, if only a little bit, and when’s the last time I cracked open a book to read, All Night Wrong Will.

Saturday, April 13, 2019

Episode 286 ~All Night Wrong Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars? you know last week I talked about bottling that feeling “HAPPINESS.” Well like all of my novels so far, nothing came of it, not that today was terrible. Please Universe, hear me on that. I still want what I want. I am a millionaire; I am in love. I am still B III’s father. I am not tired; I am powerful, Lady Lu I am happy.

Ask me why did it take me this long to say all of this tonight. Now the ideas have been flowing, and my fingers have been available but the Will. Well, I’m here now, and the doubts are creeping in. Case and point, I’m still in the bed. I should be at my table, and I’ll get there soon enough. If anything my belief in extreme wealth has kept me going so far. Nowadays, I ask myself why I’m so ready to believe in two and not many more millions. Boobs, Lady Lu and take right now this moment I won’t attempt to get all sexual making a long night longer. Now didn’t that sound all kinds of wrong? What I’m usually writing about at this hour, you know Lu.

I’m a dreamer, and the best way to utilize that would be, on a pillow. The staring up at the white ceiling, like last night. How I so prefer the darkness in the room, or of my eyelids. Have I mentioned how much I miss sleep? Then there’s that head down below. Only somehow it manages to maneuver itself between my heart and my brain. Even if the fingers are alright, it’s like attempting to talk ten men off the edge of my laptop. While I may be into motivational speakers, I could never be one. Instead, I prefer to tell people what to do through my writing, my characters. There are many countless hours and consumers galore. Those will be the reality soon enough.

As I was telling “Indiana Gone,” it’s so hard not playing “Branch” from Trolls. Only is now the time to play therapist? I said before when my Olds had me on medication, on a night like this I would do a dance flushing it down the toilet. The wasted dollars, moments and plenty of words. However tonight I’m not even cleaning up for a pretty girl. Don’t ask me about the girls when it comes to my novel; it gets ugly; All Night Wrong Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 279 ~Make Me Smile, Will~

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Easy Street, that’s the perfect way to sum up my day, no day job shift, food in the fridge, and 2,600 words for my novel, and I’m not sleepy, as my motivations say, your purpose is the thing that stops time, so look at my face. “Make Me Smile, Will.”

Saturday, April 6, 2019

Episode 279 ~Make Me Smile, Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, bottle up this feeling I’m having right now. Dare I call it HAPPINESS. I was listening to this Brainbuddy recording the other day. It was talking about dopamine “pleasure” knowing control in the body. Now I’m no doctor, and that’s okay. Still considering everything that flows in and out of people. The moment I got to work and realized I didn’t have to stay today, wow.

Felt better than any orgasm, and when leaving work makes me feel like this? Talk about 7 Minutes In Heaven, The Rapture, or The Divine Comedy. A spiritual experience, never known in the church. This morning I was struggling to throw all the best I could at the universe. I did my “Morning Routine,” got some fresh air with B III, did the Law of Attraction hypnosis. Now I didn’t fall asleep per se; I set my alarms just in case. After all that, I was still fighting my emotions. About my day job, my “father,” life in general, it was touch and go there with NO FAP. My stress level was going all over.

So like I’ve been doing every day, my dominant positive thought has been “I Have A Million Dollars.” That’s it “I AM Rich,” “My bank account is full,” “There is more than enough.” Fighting off the bad vibes. As for today, my work shift got canceled. I didn’t have to see my “father” at all. I even had enough to get myself a treat. So do I take this as the Universe responding to my wishes? I AM grateful for this day. Triple B is staying healthy, my million has arrived, and more is coming. I got a good night’s rest. Let the Universe hear me; it’s on my side isn’t that right Lady Luna.

Yesterday was hard, so of course, I needed to do some significant asking. Yes at the end of “some” days, the good outweighs the bad. Only I choose to believe that a genie is watching my back. Um, I still admire Will Smith. Is there anything else that makes me want to smile today. How I imagined my bedroom, my private shower, having my home theater. There was a guy today who even said my car must run pretty fast.

No time machine but like Terminator 2 Judgement Day I face the future with hope; Universe, Make Me Smile, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 272 ~Will Is Not Ill~

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Stupidity is a virus, and it’s like everyone is afraid of catching it from me, and I feel like I’m living in I Am Legend, only me and the dog; so who’s sick and who’s well, I would never give those monsters the satisfaction. Will Is Not Ill

Saturday, March 30, 2019

Episode 272 ~Will Is Not Ill~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, I’m not looking for a miracle. If anything I only need to get out of my “hard” bed. Now isn’t it ironic that for the things I want I’m quite content lying here? Still, I will purposely kill myself to get to the store on time.

Now I can name some genuine, honest to God, ha, illnesses. It’s the season for POLLEN. There are Springs and Summers I can’t recall because my mother would keep me doped up on Benadryl. Only that’s before they tweaked the formula and yes I’m that old. There’s the massive case of BLUE BALLS I’m suffering now. I have once again wasted one more day. While I wish I could say in recovery, and I have slept, at least 80% of it was porn related. The other 20% is half Youtube and 10%Zweihander; to say nothing of my mental health. A toss-up between depression and rage, B III isn’t helping either.

No, I’m not that far gone, but it sucks to have to remind you anyway and anyone else. I would never hurt my son; I wouldn’t do anything to a girl. The truth is that it doesn’t stop him from flinching. Doesn’t stop the girls from running and calling me a monster. The world is sick, not me, and before you ask how can I be so sure. Well besides the fact that Hemingway will call me out for it. That’s the thing, too many chefs in the kitchen and I keep adding more. There are Grammarly and Hemingway for my writing. Brainbuddy and NoFap to be a better man. My motivations and books, to keep me going forward. It’s a snail’s pace if anything. I know it Lady Lu.

What I can’t seem to find is the cure. Only I’ll keep popping myself with a rubber band to remind me of my stupidity. Also to keep me from punching somebody out. That ain’t healthy. My life goals to own a brothel, “love hotel,” strip club, restaurant, movie studio, and everything else. Truth is surrounding myself with porn isn’t helping, now sex? Hell, I want to be comfortable around people. Tell me when I feel that the most? When I have my Negan swagger. “THEY” are treating me like I’m STUPID though Lady Lu, that’s it. I become one of the dead; slaves aren’t considered alive. I’ll call a woman a lot of things, but stupid is crossing the line. I’m better than that; I will be. You want me to be positive? I’m Not Stupid, or dead. I AM ALIVE; sex makes me feel that Will Is Not Ill.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 265 ~Hell Of Weak Will~

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I think I called this week exactly what I thought it would be and I was too weak to make it otherwise, even today and of course counting up failures is tomorrow’s business; maybe I need a new hobby. “Hell Of Weak Will” or a Stupid Will

Saturday, March 23, 2019

Episode 265 ~Hell Of Weak Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How to Make One Million Dollars, well I still have plans to go to “Sin City.” What was it, last week, the one before? All I could think about was a bestseller, building, brothel, and babes. This week I instead not think at all or I don’t; that’s because I Am Stupid.

Being a traditionalist, I do prefer the “old-timey” HORNY, FEARFUL, and STUPID. That’s not to say that I’m against “SAT” words Abnegation, Erudite, Dauntless, Amity, and Candor. How I miss Shailene Woodley; of course, you knew I would go with Horny first. Don’t worry this all links in with my general stupidity. Having gone to the movies Thursday and seeing Jordan Peele’s “US,” I was disappointed. There was no sex scene with Lupita Nyong’o. What about the fact that I now know who Cali and Noelle Sheldon are? Yes, Lady Lu I’m going to Hell, but I haven’t looked for any twin porn; yet. No, I saved that for Eileen Kelly in Playboy. More the lack thereof, the hits keep coming, sadly like me Thursday.

It was too much Lady Lu, the fear I mean. My last panic attack was at the day job over cleaning duty. Before that back when I was another “redshirt.” The men of Star Trek make dying look so easy I mean the original series. Now there I was at the movies, shaking because I was attempting to make exact change. Such a fear bothers me more than looking up girls on the internet. Between Fear and Rage, my fear won. You know rage doesn’t think. Lady Lu, Fear is a fucking Brainiac (Language Please). Is that what “US” was talking about right? I may as well be one of the Tethered, no soul but all the rage coming topside.

So why am I too stupid to use it? Do you know why I call myself out on my language usage? One day I think I’ll find the courage and I’ll tell those assholes (really Will) No More. Allow me to be a hypocrite in saying that fear makes you smart and an idiot. It’s why I’m looking for a new vice, hobby, and distraction. Everyone needs something, makes us human or something close. I was too weak this week to keep it up, which is why I didn’t work Friday. Not the Day Job or my Purpose, nothingness Lady Lu, Hell Of Weak Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 258 ~Blind Faith To Will~

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Do I still think I can see into the future, I wrote this Wednesday, and I saw this day going a lot better, only I wasn’t blind to some girl, I know what I need to do, and tomorrow sigh. Blind Faith To Will

Saturday, March 16, 2019

Episode 258 ~Blind Faith To Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, today is Wednesday. I’m still STUCK on the idea that I will write a best seller. Now if I had the money this second, I know there is no way I would be going to work on Sunday. My problem is that I don’t see the money though. I see Inventory, insanity, and indignation. One of my motivations says that no one can hate you more than you hate yourself. Only nowadays I look, others don’t.

In a way I envy them. In some ways, a button is worse than a trigger. Do you recall when I was talking about Brainbuddy (which you should CANCEL Friday okay)? My deep confusion about what classifies as porn. Yep, I lied to those people “One? Yeah.” Giving up Fapping, sure. The porn, hell after doing the Morning Routine, it was right back to the Heartless Prince. After that Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest. Still, nobody can show me something more beautiful than women. Some people tell me to have faith in God. Blind faith and those same people were the ones that made me out to be a nerd or worse. So my eyes were too full of tears. I was busy getting up close and personal with a baseball bat, balled fist, and my blood in the dirt most days.

I saw this religious movie once called Apocalypse, and there was this guy Bronson Pearl. Now he wouldn’t listen to his girlfriend or some story. He dug up his father’s grave and only at that moment did he find faith. Faith Lady Luna is work. I was looking at myself, and for once it wasn’t my fucked up teeth (LANGUAGE). Nor was it my body; it was my bloodshot eyes from working.

Nevertheless, with my writing, I do not see the results and the day job sigh. I’d rather be dead instead. Now that sounds harsh, but it’s like everything in my world is, I don’t know. In one way it’s living in a museum, don’t touch that it’s priceless. Don’t think that, those people were savages. Stay behind the rope, the line, the people. Better yet don’t look ever.

Am I back in school before I had my glasses? Only I couldn’t see the board so of course, I failed. Math where I was expected to get it, but I never did. So I bought into lies, and now I’m an adult where there is no future in my job. Walmart fails ha, or my eyes are stuck on a screen, headphones always. Is that the game, you see too much or too little. However they say look up, and even the sun is blinding. Still, I know every shade of blue there is. I can’t close my eyes anymore, but why believe in myself, Blind Faith To Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 251 ~I’m Staying Alive Will~

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If you don’t have your health; the thing is I think I know what will fix this but after that monster headache, no more energy shots for a while but my poor characters t if I stay awake today. I’m Staying Alive Will.

Saturday, March 9, 2019

Episode 251 ~I’m Staying Alive Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars; I’m sure I’ll make it after I’m long dead. As much as I have written, but it will be nowhere near three thousand words. Did I promise myself such today working?

Head games you know. When your body is telling you your so fucked up (Language) that it has you going looking on WebMD for answers. In that respect why aren’t I dead by now? Hearing one of your coworkers say again and again their not a racist. Speaking the truth though they’re mad about a former lover dating someone black. However, in all fairness, I’m not one to date black women. We’ve talked about the ones that leave me in the morning. Help me; if I were to ask for it, it would come in a little plastic tube. 5-hour ENERGY still has me wrecked, from my head to my feet nowadays, could be worse.

Heartbreak and I know my heart isn’t so. Seriously though I hate coming off like Howard Wolowitz or like some criminal. Yeah, women prefer the clown but the comedian died and how many days has it been? Hair Razing as my heart sank when I saw what was coming. Do you know what’s going to make me such the zombie survivor? I learned to avoid people when they’re still alive. Hands not idle but sore, sexy, and sorry for, well I’m here. Shouldn’t I make a list of my crimes, but that’s the thing, isn’t it. I don’t want to survive; I want to live.

Horny never helps though. If there is any consolation, with all this pain I’m feeling at the present moment; I can’t think about sex. Not saying I would turn it down but that should show you how much this hurts. Hips, Legs, all the way down to my toes, how I stood at all today is a miracle. I got up early to read today. I’m two minutes away from crawling into bed and going back to sleep, much like I did this morning after the book. Health is everything isn’t it Lady Lu. Yes B III has better health care than me because he has me and he’s alive.

How about if I only try living. Am I going to break off into some positive phase like once upon a time? All I know is that today sure as hell ain’t that day, only I’m not dying. I’m not getting arrested, one more miracle right, I’m Staying Alive Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 244 ~Scared Will, Theories Told~

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I should keep my “Wisdom” to myself, but I didn’t break my hands, my throat though goes from itchy to Aww Hell and wouldn’t that be the best punishment for someone like me, to tell stories to no one ever. Scared Will, Theories Told

Saturday, February 23, 2019

Episode 244 ~Scared Will, Theories Told~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, as I dare to call myself a writer, an easy mistake to make, again and again. I could take being the one to find out how the world found its conclusion, all its shapes, and forms.

With everything on my mind recently, I had this theory at the Day Job about the Mark of The Beast. Now I am still not a religious man, but they say the mark will be seen in our right hands today. Yes, there are left-handed people but think about it, our phones. I wrote before about how “THEY” say people care for their phones more than their children. The flesh of our flesh and hell on B III’s Birthday I was a slave to mine, it knows everything. The mark will also find homes on our foreheads, worse, in our brains. How much does Spotify understand about me, how much social media, XVideos or PornHub?

Less these days I know, but another idea is that one life can change the world. I also believe in zombies, aliens and for the past week again I am Prometheus. Is it the heart today or my privates, for now, I’m not getting a “stiffy.” If I get a hard on somebody’s going Lorena Bobbitt on my behind, if I open up my heart, that’s a snack. So either way, I’m pushing a stone up a hill much like Sisyphus. My happiest decisions nowadays are me carrying the world on my shoulders like Atlas. I call a girl pretty, that’s a block. If I see a girl on Twitter, deleted, and if I decide to shrug off having any desire, I’m nothing at all.

What’s with Titanomachy and me, do I see such wisdom in the Greeks. Well the gods defeated the Titans, and again Christianity hasn’t done me any favors, so why did I leave; “WHY” I asked why. God says come as you are and you’ll be born again, but I don’t like that guy either. Why do I want the BDSM Lifestyle? Now that’s too big a subject; I wrote the most beautiful things for the worse men. So they could end up with “innocent” angels.

As you can see these days, women run away. Still to meet one that walks into a cage, chain, or collars willingly and doesn’t want to leave? My childhood, I wrote my name and asked my aunt what I wrote, and I’ve been asking women ever since permission. Like my seventh “birthday” when I said What The Hell instead of “What in tarhooties?!” Well ever since then I’ve traveled a “Fury Road” of people, yet I commit more sins every day unfailingly. Muttering “I’m Sorry” eternally Scared Will, Theories Told.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 237 ~Pen Hand Strong Will~

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I began in the midnight hour, and I’m only now rising, I was busy keeping my guts down, and if I had done so earlier well, I wouldn’t feel this way; “Looked Who Grossed Up” and that wasn’t even the worst night but now? Pen Hand Strong Will.

Saturday, February 23, 2019

Episode 237 ~Pen Hand Strong Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, at the moment, even if I had it, I would spend it all to make this feeling go away. Do you know why I always ask the question? Because my first impression, insinuation, and involvement is still the way wrong answer.

It doesn’t explain why I am talking to you so late tonight or early this morning. Other than the fact that I feel like I might vomit and like I said yesterday. That proves one has guts but who wants to see that. We’re not doctors, Walkers, and even knights wore armor. If that’s what thing I learned tonight, I’m no prince on a white horse. Lady Luna I’ve come to the understanding that I’m one of two things and neither would allow me to sleep. Option A being, I’m a monster, I scare people, I’ve said it myself time and time again. Option B I’m nothing, I’m no one, and that’s why there is no need to wish, whisper, or write because who sees. Well, she did and convicted me, she did and called me out, she did and canceled, she did cause I’m nothing.

It hasn’t tasted the same you know, an ICEE, I still drink them, but on one day I nearly killed a dog. He slammed into my car door, but the taste I miss from my drink. The same with IBC Root Beer when my “father” slapped me, and they say alcohol numbs the pain. What about sleep, I haven’t gotten to rest a night without blogging first, and you know what caused that. Lesson 001 Looked Who Grossed Up and here we are again Lady Luna. Now I’ll never be able to look at Pokemon. Think about that Crazy Town song Butterfly. Listen to Michael Jackson’s Butterflies without thinking of what happened tonight. I’m sure you’re asking what the hell, so I guess I’m ready.

I asked a woman out once; she said nothing. I asked her out again this month; she said nothing. She showed butterflies around her and her daughter I posted “Butterfree” on Instagram. I quoted Crazy Town Lyrics to Butterfly, and here we are. Blocked, no bye, and with the belief, I’m the worse creature to roam the planet Earth. No, a cretin, worthless and cowering afraid of losing everything. Now I want to erase it all because it’s easier to destroy myself than watch others leave me once again, been there. Why do you think I’m always on the brink, forever seeing the end but no I repeat the mistakes of the past. My how a year and a half passed August 6, 2017, and now February 22, 2019, in the same horrific situation. Damn Pen Hand Strong Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 230 ~Will Puddin, Published, Genius~

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Put your money where your mouth is, excellent advice considering my situation, and ten bucks; a salve for an itch I can’t scratch o maybe like a cat that’s what paper is for and even now a voice is yelling, stop that. Will Puddin, Published, Genius

Saturday, February 16, 2019

Episode 230 ~Will Puddin, Published, Genius~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, they keep staring me in the face. Her boobs, that boing in my pants, and books that remain unpublished and why. I’m not the good guy, the god-fearing man or a genius… aren’t I supposed to be positive after yesterday’s rant?

“All I wanted was to see her naked!” ―
Girl All The Bad Guys Want

https://www.patreon.com/Courtcarmody

Luna I have, don’t you know, not as much as I would like. I’m never going to let that go right; quite presidential, you start messing with people’s money, and it’s over. Court Carmody sigh compared to the MILF. The things men will do for boobs, because we are boobs and that ladies in gentlemen is the English language. Of course, that’s not as bad as my Math. Though $10.00 beats, um well; let it go, Elsa, am I right? So besides sex, money is on my mind, and again with the motivations. Don’t follow the money, but the purpose and I sit here having an inception moment. Remember all the people I blamed yesterday, and I told “Indiana Gone” today who I would most like to be? Larry Flynn, Hugh Hefner, Ron Jeremy, Dennis Hof, and another guy I’m better off not naming, again.

Okay, you get it a fat rich white guy that gets to have plenty of sex. These are men who have cash from young women getting nude being on camera, and working in cat-houses. That’s why I’m brainstorming or being lazy, your call. Anyway as I was having a conversation with Indiana Gone, I told her my dream. I have to get published, starting producing books like I’m S. Wolf, Skye Warren, and Larry Flynn combined. Until I can afford photographers, property, then head west. Everything Dennis Hof had, I want that lifestyle. No not the show but movies no doubt, a “love hotel” like they have in Japan, and with all this, I still want the love of family.

I’m not stupid, I’m staying positive, but I’m not a genius, I am a guy with a penis. Hell if I last the day, the first week of No Fap once again and I even finished Lolita. I was telling “Cherry” today who fashions herself a Lolita… she’s twenty-one, and I’ve never seen her boobs. Anyway, I was telling her that word here can lead to trouble. Since my whole bad teeth “realization” why is it that even my fingers are shutting up these days. Things I shouldn’t say like last night. I’m still thinking about my taste in women. They are either innocent virgins or women with bad sexual histories. Ironically I have seen all four of those women naked. Two I didn’t pay for but again how do I turn this into profit. I’ve offered both MILFS a deal, one though has her reasons and the other? I’m not shelling out that type of cash again. Because at least for now, or I would like to be, I’m only Will Puddin, Published, Genius.

I Will Have No Fear