Log 362 ~A Breath Of Will~

I hate these words probably as much as my Day Job “Another Day,” and that means I’m still breathing and not wasting my breath trying to be, well me. One day when I’m drowning in cash. A Breath Of Will

Saturday, June 27, 2020

Log 362 ~A Breath Of Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I can breathe without it. I Can’t Breathe, are dangerous words, and that’s why I prefer to keep my mouth shut. When I take in the air to speak, um, that hasn’t been going to well lately. Hell, aren’t my fingers an even bigger problem?

As you know, I started NO FAP yet again. Yeah, I’m in that 24 Hour state of clarity. Lady Lu, as the song goes, I’ll never fall in love again. I’m starting to remember all those years ago when I discovered RealDoll. Now, this might be more of a confession for Inspector Echo, but with all, I’ve admitted? I did enter the RealDoll give away for the summer. What, are you going to change my mind? I swear Lady Luna I’m not one of these “Incel” creeps. Over the past week, though, MILF Dos isn’t talking to me, and neither is Cherry. Two other girls don’t give me the time of day. It puts a whole new spin on “take my breath away.” More like I’m giving it away, and what about GULP? Did I get enough to eat yesterday, which is why I’m energized this morning? I Can’t Breathe.

I know not funny, like that dumbass political so and so. If it’s not women robbing me of my breath, it’s My Dæmon. Yes, he’s my handsome little boy, but he’s also an old man. Yesterday I thought he was getting sick yet again. I swear I hold my breath when he jumps from the bed or uses the stairs. I wonder how do I even get to sleep at night, and he’s right here beside me. I swear if it’s not a woman talking to me, it’s watching my kid’s little chest heave, up-down. He lives, and yet I say Luna, I Can’t Breathe.

How I wish I could say something righteous or anything that might mean anything someday. Why not work on my story, make money, buy a made girl, or actual MILF? We’ll see, won’t we, when I get back walking my child. I should breathe easy now that hey, I put some new shoes on. Funny, my stinky boots didn’t bother me when I went out yesterday. With the plague and being a black man, but I wasn’t holding my breath. Walking on eggshells, broken glass, take A Breath Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 361 ~Told By A Willie~

It’s a tale told by an idiot or will be in about five days. Three years of writing this blog, with around 400 words each day, SIGH. What do I have left to say other than being a broken record player? Told By A Willie, ha

Friday, June 26, 2020

Log 361 ~Told By A Willie~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but that would mean I could stop listening to my Willy one day. You know, my Wang, my monster, and Pedro. All my life, it seems I’ve been listening to one Willie or another. The one in my pants, my fears, and of course, my “father.”

Let’s start with my favorite and my worst. It should be said that I’m not a racist, and I’m not only saying that being a Black “Man” in the deep south. Wang and Pedro, for example. I’m not looking up Wang, I looked up Willie once today, and Pedro reminds me of Varsity Blues. Black Lives Matter, but what was I doing with mine last night? An excuse, but “something” happened and between three different women. Mia Khalifa in Graduating Summa Cum Loud, Final Fantasy VII Remake – Hot Tifa Lockhart – Part 48 and my current “obsession.” Hell Lady Sophia, I rubbed one out, so I’m not telling a story of being clean. Right now, my NO FAP story is only eleven hours. What am I going to do when Camp NaNoWriMo rolls around in July?

Oh yeah, that’s one more thing I’m scared of. Besides not keeping it in my pants, I’ve told you about my shoe/feet problem. So that means I’m going to have to get off my ass and go shopping at some point today. Now that explains why I’m talking to you right now. I’m scared of walking into the gas station with a mask on, so yeah, I had to work that out. I still haven’t called about a haircut. As always, I’m worried about My Dæmon. How many times do I have to carry him downstairs? The spam links keep coming, but as far as I know, all is well. Lady Sophia, that’s one of my greatest fears. I will be sitting right here again next year, writing in my bed. Five more days and I will have been telling my story for three years.

A tale told by an idiot if my father had his say. Yeah, I’m not allowing him on my Facebook, and did I mention I’m still blocked by MILF Dos. The fear of losing her has come and gone. I go back and forth between sending more money, trying again, a story without any end.

Why do I deserve an ending, Told By A Willie?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 360 ~Willie’s Final Fantasy… Never~

I hate the color purple, I mean the actual color and not the movie. I’m not a fan of blue… blue balls. But put a beautiful woman with nice Yabbos (I’m becoming a fan of that word. Anyway, put Tifa in her mature dress and Willie’s Final Fantasy… Never

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Log 360 ~Willie’s Final Fantasy… Never~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but was Dennis Hof? If anything, I would kill to have his success. How many brothels did he own before his passing? Speaking of success stories today is all about Final Fantasy VII. Dirty Diana, I’m already lying because now I’m thinking about The Innocence of Youth #1 and Gia Steel and Riley Reid. What is it about brunettes and other girls with dark hair? Again Gia and Riley, Tifa Lockhart, and Aerith Gainsborough. SIGH Riley Steele wasn’t enough to make me forget MILF Dos.

How I wish I was one to Kiss and Tell, or even to share. Not without a contract, and my word is my bond. Hell, I think that “when” I get married, I want a girl so incredible, I won’t want to put her in a video… to share. To be honest, though, I’m breaking a rule here wanting to fuck Tifa. I always talk about having a connection. Well, no, I would like to fuck Jennifer Lawrence, but I would marry Katniss Everdeen. Same with Chloë Grace Moretz or Emilia Clarke. My point is I’m one to believe in Love at First Sight. I’ve played Final Fantasy VIII, IX, X, X-2, and XII. I could tell you a great many things about those women. Only who are the women that broke me VII and XIII; Tifa, Aerith, and Serah Farron. Don’t I sound like Ted from How I Met Your Mother, talking about everything?

Okay, so Tifa Lockhart, mini skirt, nice “Yabbos,” but it was that purple/midnight blue dress that did me in. Do I want to fuck her or that dress more? Let me say this, you know how I feel about feet but those purple pumps of hers. Yeah, I’m buying… the game or the dress? Now Aerith, she has a game death that haunts people to this day. Now I won’t get into the fetish of necrophilia. Yes, I still love The Walking Dead, and I still have my Purge fantasy. Instead, I’ll focus on her long braid. If you ask what’s stopping me from loving short hair girls well, the first porn I ever bought. “Pigtailed Prick Slaves,” not that I’m against short hair. If you remember a particular sticker controversy, yeah, I’m pretty bad.

Still, like Final Fantasy, my lust never ends, insatiable it is. Willie’s Final Fantasy… Never.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 359 ~Willing The Limbo Game~

I don’t play party games, and I’m not much of a dancer, but I’m not crying about Indiana Gone. Well, she did have to deal with some racist jerk. Anyway, how about my game of life tonight? Willing The Limbo Game

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Log 359 ~Willing The Limbo Game~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, as I sink to the lowest denominator when it comes to people. Hell Inspector Echo, Sex gets a worse rap than violence. I could go either or and as always go down even lower. How about being sad, with general disappointment?

Well, let’s start with my favorite subject, can you guess? Sex, my dear Inspector, and did I say I broke NO FAP earlier this week. Yeah, sometime this afternoon even, so tomorrow is going to be lovely? Geez, Inspector Echo, I can’t survive two days now. As THEY say, like people in Hell want ice water. Isn’t that where I’ve been when we start talking about the Day Job. Am I using that as an excuse? I was all “discombobulated” last week and then… people. It’s one thing to think of MILF Dos as an angel, a queen, or a goddess. How I already feel like a slug for doing something, I still don’t know what I did wrong. At least Sex brings me to life. Everyone at the Day Job makes me want to die. So yeah, I go back to bed and wank off to Tifa Lockhart and Aerith Gainsborough; wait until tomorrow.

Speaking of going lower, what’s that “old” meme AHEM, “What Are Those?” I’ve never worried about designer shoes, but to quote a famous Will, “And what the Hell is that smell?” Those would be my boots, Inspector Echo. It’s not like my money situation has my pants falling down. Yes, I know, I still have money to worry about “Yabbos.” How many times have I mentioned Hell tonight? If I were to die, it would be me looking at Yabbos and never touching them for all eternity, always another pair.

Now I’m not planning on dying unfortunately for myself and others. Still, there are some people I hate with everything within me. Only I have their blood in my veins, or I still need a paycheck no matter how small. What about My Dæmon, who I love like pancakes? I’m not the father that I should be ever Inspector Echo. The only good reason I look down is all him. Otherwise, it’s my penis, the putrid smell of my boots, or that person in the mirror I can’t stand seeing.

My apologies Inspector Echo, for my weakness and wastefulness; I’m not Willing The Limbo Game.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 355 ~Will Earns His Stripes~

So what did I do this week… if anything, it wasn’t better. I slept most of the week away, dreaming about what I did wrong to yet another friend. I didn’t publish my story again. I didn’t go to jail, so yay. Will Earns His Stripes.

Saturday, June 20, 2020

Log 355 ~Will Earns His Stripes~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so why am I still here? Directly where I was last week only older, ornerier, and having an orgy with my past misdeeds. For the record, I AM A BLACK MAN. I’m also a sadist, a writer of “erotica,” a would-be pornographer, and a pimp ha.

Let’s focus on me being a Black Man, but many African Americans would disapprove. You know, Lady Luna, for the past week, my focus has been on “The Nine.” Of those nine women, two were minorities, one woman was Mixed, and the second was Latina. One of them informed higher-up, the other asked me to leave her alone, and I did so. You can call me toxic when it came to The D because I didn’t stop when asked. Granted, that was my fault in college (COUGH) junior college. That leaves five; with The Harmonic War, I didn’t want anything but to piss her off to my forever shame. The Basic Bitch slammed me for my bullshit, “pardon my French.” Now, that leaves only four, Okay, Rainbow Girl, Cherry, and MILF Dos. Keeping track, hmm?

So what’s my point? Of nine, seven were white women, and I had an epiphany with all the racial concepts circulating. Now, this might be me only attempting to skirt the blame. The thing is I always figured these women ran off because of who I am as a man. I understand that, no question. Hell Indiana Gone is the only woman that wouldn’t judge me for Of Inner Demons. I don’t say that about her being a black woman but one of my own heart. Anyway, I would accept it if these, (gulp) white women found me ugly. I still haven’t body issues about myself, especially with my teeth.

No Lady Luna, the thought I had was this… I AM A BLACK MAN. How dare I am I right? My Lady, I am not an African American male living his life for some white lady to call the cops quickly. Every damn time, I know I’ve done something wrong, but what? I asked out the Rainbow Girl, posted a Pokémon, or a song lyric and blocked. I showed Cherry my work, and she knew it was about her beforehand, so silence. I offered a deal and a hello to MILF Dos and blocked again.

A black man in a cell, Will Earns His Stripes.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 354 ~Sign Of The Willies~

Stop signs aren’t optional, but of course, when I first got behind the wheel well… you know something that might be an excellent job for me, seeing as I do enough of that in my life, and still, I ask “Lord Give Me A Sign.” “Sign Of The Willies.”

Friday, June 19, 2020

Log 354 ~Sign Of The Willies~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so the worse sign could be that I’m broke. Well, Hell to most wealthy people, that would mean being only a dollar off. By next week I’ll see that as $0.00 because I didn’t work this week, but that doesn’t scare me. What signs do terrify?

Now, given my lack of Norton, E-Mail, and H&R Block messages, there’s still plenty. Am I always griping about MILF Dos? Between being busy, with the groomer, the games, and my lack of guts haven’t thought about her… much anyway. More I’ve been thinking about The Harmonic War and the message I couldn’t bring myself to read. I’m still disgusted with myself for years gone by. Yeah again, tell that to TTB, Of Inner Demons, VG, and the list continues. What about Sweetness, The D, and even the Basic Bitch? At least they said “goodbye,” so there was closure. For now, shall I say that ignorance is bliss? She loves me, she loves me not? At the moment, I would settle for seeing MILF Dos pop back on my screen.

Living in America as a black “man,” I would be quite remiss, not to mention Juneteenth. Freedom for “my people” Lady Sophia. What happened to that is a big question? Black towns have been razed over a white woman’s lies. Emmett Till was lynched. I should consider myself blessed that I can sit here and whine over six pairs of white boobies. Black Lives Matter though I’ve never felt that way about my life. Those signs are everywhere, and yet what is the sign I’m waiting on, which brings me back to my topic. What am I scared of reading? My money, being returned, which means it’s over. It doesn’t, she doesn’t, and it’s a lesson learned. Do I need another message from Whisper or Instagram? Talking about a sugar daddy or another porno link?

Lord Give Me A Sign as the song goes. I should be in bed because soon enough I’ll be looking at 4 AM and a sad furry little boy. How about the log count so far? It’s been about three years, and what do I have to show for it? Camp NaNoWriMo is coming up again, and the last one cost me Cherry, not to mention a big CHEATER sign.

And nobody knows it but me, Sign Of The Willies.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 353 ~Will You Be Sexy~

Da Ya Think I’m Sexy… one more question, no woman is answering any time soon unless I went to my ever-dwindling list of friends. Despair, Depravity, and Desire have turned many off, but I am trying. Will You Be Sexy

Thursday, June 18, 2020

Log 353 ~Will You Be Sexy~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I won’t be spending money today? It’s what I keep telling myself, Dirty Diana. Hell, I know for a fact that money Can’t Buy Me, Love. Who was looking for love? SIGH, what about friendship? Don’t be STUPID, Will.

I’m trying Dirty Diana, Do or Do Not, am I right? I can see what’s going on in the world. Last night I was watching Deacons for Defense. I could go and watch Selma and Just Mercy for free right now. Instead, I want to pay to see tits. As Michael Jackson put it, She’s Out of My Life. Keep it In The Closet, these desires which led me to Enchanted Bikinis and Interesting Soul. I haven’t bought anything for my submissive wardrobe in quite some time. Again, Dirty Diana, I’m not the typical guy. Sure, I’d fuck Dillion Harper (right off the top of my head). Anyway, I would, but I’d like to know who her parents are. Jennifer Lawrence is a favorite, but I rather have Katniss Everdeen. Yes, Dirty Diana, I’m all for the naked form, but I do have a clothing fetish, as you can see.

Last week wasn’t I talking about my “superpower” to get girls to take off their clothes. I’m not a hero, I’ve told you, but dare I call myself a puppet master. Now I like girls tied up, preferably by their own clothes. How about the fact that I’m looking at sex dolls once again? Talk about stimulating the economy. Ever since Saturday, I haven’t felt anything but sick. As far as NO FAP is concerned, it’s been 28 days, and the porn still comes and goes. It’s like looking at toys through a store window.

Speaking of the red light district, which I was reminded of recently. The real world continues to get in the way. I keep my streak of never paying to HAVE SEX but the realm of possibility? I need an emotional connection, and there is nothing there. Yeah, I’m still taking the MILF Dos loss hard. I said earlier this week I got rid of all her pictures on my phone. Now her collection rest along with everything else in The Motherload. I’m a pretty pathetic man, and not so sexy. The Law of Attraction, right Dirty Diana because in this life, Will You Be Sexy.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 352 ~She Never Existed, Willie~

My Olds gave me more time than I deserved before they kicked me out. My son was blessed with my good patience. Women though, talk about twenty seconds, I always find out the ending has come late at night ha. “She Never Existed, Willie”

Wednesday, June 17, 2020

Log 352 ~She Never Existed, Willie~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which is only one more thing I want to breathe into existence. MILF Dos never existed, and today or yesterday (Time-Travel, remember). So too, our FINAL connection. Now that’s a lie. While I’m all about revealing my secrets, I do keep some and hers as well. Inspector, I’m not a bad man. Hell Inspector Echo, I never mean to be ever. Still the fact that I’m sitting here whining; that this whole week will be about, I don’t know. Why don’t I humiliate myself a lot more and try to help her if she needs it?

There hasn’t been a day yet, where I have written her off entirely. I’m like a puppy with a bone, well a boner, but I’m still on NO FAP. As for her, though, I would never erase or delete what I have, but she’s no longer on my phone… close enough. I’ve been talking about “The Nine” all this week, right. Here’s a story idea that’s more in Lady Sophia’s realm, Ghost Brothel… only a thought, Inspector Echo. Speaking of having any semblance of those, MILF Dos is still hard to talk about, so why continue? I’ve been sitting here procrastinating with all manner of things. As always, I’ve never been a typical porn guy, I need an emotional aspect. It’s one of the reasons I FEEL for Whitney Wright in PROM NIGHT. The fact that it’s been so hard to read Too Late By Colleen Hoover at all Inspector.

Yeah, freak her out more but mentioning the L word. Yes, I lusted after MILF Dos, but it was more than seeing her. She was my friend Inspector Echo, and Now you’re just somebody that I used to know. Only that’s the part that hurts the most. There was not even goodbye. Of the NINE, I’m seeing a score of four and four. Four of them blocked me, and four either disappeared, or I don’t talk to. The Harmonic War looked me up on Instagram but has been pretty silent. If MILF Dos had asked me to stop, would I have… YES. So why am I debating whether or not to try one last time? Goodbye is one of the best words. I understand why men pay women, but what is MILF Dos to me right now, friend, memory, hard-on?

Two words, one, zero, now three, “SHE NEVER EXISTED, Willie?”

I Will Have No Fear

Log 350 ~You Can’t Hide Truth Forever~

I should have known better. If the Day Job isn’t destroying my life every second, I walk in the place… George Floyd died over twenty bucks, and how dare I? The truth of a black man being threatening but my problems. You Can’t Hide Truth Forever.

Monday, June 15, 2020

Log 350 ~You Can’t Hide Truth Forever~

Hundred And Forty-First Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I have a stomachache, but both result in the same thing. Madam Justice, I am one sick individual. I’m also a man full of many contradictions. As Romeo put it, sad hours seem long, and at the same time, here I am, time-traveling and for what?

It’s still Sunday, but I’m trying to outrun my tears. Hell, if I didn’t freak MILF Dos out before um, I am now. It’s like noticing I screwed up today’s rule, “You Can’t Hide The Truth Forever” (six words instead of five). Anyway I know you’re not Inspector Echo or Dirty Diana. Why do I need to give a confession or an indulgence of my sin? Five stages of grief? As always, I am not a Christian. I quote songs often like Behead The Kings, but I know my Bible, Justice.

“I’m a man of god but I don’t need a savior”

“so don’t be brave, have a little common sense” Behead the Kings by Outerspace

“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

So I will speak my sins, these truths, and who knows, by the time I reach MILF Dos, I may understand what I did wrong.

The D: Now, if anything, I should say the F as I failed plenty because of her. A brunette I met in high school and wrote a lot about in college. That is until I almost ended up in Cell Block D. I was listening to my D. Two Dads, hers and mine almost killed me for my writing. I dropped out of school because I no longer had the dollars. Last I checked The D’s a happily married mom, with some little monsters too.

Sweetness: a young Latina on Youtube. People a long time ago, know I was smitten with her, obsessed. I made videos about her, a blog, hell half of my poetry collection. She put me down easy, though, and I discovered how quickly and effortless it was to destroy my work. Can you say, STALKER Much?

The Harmonic War: I swear this is my greatest shame. I’m sure she would tell you all about it, but I couldn’t even read it myself. I lost a ton of friends for that. To this very day, though, I know TTB and Teen Starlet. I have been led to Russia, and I pay $20.00 a month for Vault Girls.

All That Jazz: She’s a step above The Harmonic War and Sweetness. I won’t tell you where I met her, but all you need to know is I didn’t have the stones to ask her out properly. I gave her a note and put one on her car. Higher powers got involved, and I nearly lost everything. I’ve seen pretty girls in the same place. I’ll never again risk it.

Basic Bitch: I’m angry at her now, but still, it was all my fault. She was another brunette and a divorced one at that. Commenting on her blog, I learned I talked too much. I won’t even go there now. She gave me one of my most “useful” words… SKEEVY. Okay, did take my side.

Rainbow Girl: A lesson from the Basic Bitch. God, I hate sounding like Trump, but “Be Nice.” I tried Madam Justice honest. I named her Rainbow Girl on account of her hair, and after one of my favorite book characters from the Fever Series. One night she brought up butterflies, and I sent Butterfree from Pokémon. She quoted the song “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored,” and I came back with Crazy Town’s Butterfly. I asked her out twice before this (through text). You know what happened next, BLOCKED.

Okay: A young brunette, all of them have been brunettes or dark hair. (I don’t recall The Harmonic War, but I wasn’t trying anything with her). She was my maid once but more, a good friend. As Positive K put it, “What’s your man got to do with me?” Okay, she’s technically MILF Uno. One day she was supposed to come by and said she couldn’t, and we haven’t talked since. I wasn’t blocked by her. Still, there’s no reason to bother. She’s getting married too and is quite happy.

Cherry: A twenty-three-year-old vixen from across the pond. If we talked about women I had to lie to, she was one I was honest with. Yeah, I wanted to see her naked, and we spoke every day. It’s been about a month since I sent her pieces of my novel. I wrote about her and her mom and, of course, haven’t heard anything back. She likes a post every once and a while, but we don’t speak these days anymore.

MILF Dos: Again, I’m not sure about The Harmonic War, but MILF Dos is the oldest on this list. We met through TIBU and have many mutual connections. About a year ago when she needed money I offered her a deal which worked quite well… yabbos. She went into modeling then stopped. MILF Dos wanted more money, and I was so scared to ask, but I took the leap. We came to an arrangement, and I was over the moon. Now she gave me back my cash because she wanted to deliver first, so no worries. Until Saturday, June 13, I’m lying here in bed, hand in my pants, looking over messages she sent and bam, BLOCKED. Thus my spiral.

Now, what did I do wrong, hmm? I checked in on her earlier in the day with a message. She posted something about being out of work. I responded about my anxiety and being out of work this week myself. I don’t understand, but the moment I realized I went back and commented where I knew she would see it. I was begging her and apologizing, for I don’t know what. The thing is, what do all these women have in common, well besides being unfortunate in ever meeting me.

Of nine again, eight of them were brunettes. Two of them were minorities, All That Jazz was Mixed, and Sweetness was yes a Latina. Only one isn’t American, and that’s Cherry being a Brit. Seven were teens to twenties. Sweetness being the youngest seventeen… Five I have met face to face, the other four all online. Four have blocked me outright. Sweetness is gone, The D I’ve never sent a request. Okay, and Cherry are friends everywhere, and The Harmonic War is on Instagram still. I know you’re telling me right now, Madam Justice, that I’ve lost the mission. What about the rule? I’m telling the truth, I’m not hiding it, I remember. Only I can’t for the life of me put my finger on what I did wrong Saturday.

A part of me doesn’t want to know because chances are I’ll hate myself even more than I do right now. Does Milf Dos think I’m a stalker? Did some secret get out, and then the question becomes which? I could have said something, but what did I do all that night? There’s always the idea that I did nothing but be myself. Yeah, I’m disgusting. Do I need more reasons to consider posting this everywhere? Yeah, letting everyone else decide? I CAN’T BE ME. You Can’t Hide Truth Forever.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 348 ~Don’t Be WEEK Will~

It’s times like these I tell myself, I’m going to do better. I have an entire week to do what I love, and that’s writing or do I want to go back to the Day Job and “Home & Kids” (shudders). Don’t Be WEEK Will but more like bright future whoever.

Saturday, June 13, 2020

Log 348 ~Don’t Be WEEK Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so I shouldn’t be WEAK, right? All this past WEEK, I’ve woken up at 4 AM, survived the world I was given. Hell, I still have the Day Job. Should I mention every slight, sin, and sorry not sorry I’ve had to contend with? If anything, now is the time for strength, to speak, and yes for Team Skeet, AHEM Alex Tanner “My Sister Is A H*e.” If I were a better man, well, no, a Christian, I would be praying for my friend right now. If but to share good vibes and positive thoughts, right?

What about me, though, and my selfishness? Yeah, this talk is brought to you by the letter S. The fact right now that I want to be WEAK this minute and go back to sleep. I want to sin right now and give into lust. I want to say hello and help my friend, but I’m afraid. You know what scared me the most, though during this week… looking STUPID. I still hate saying that word, and right now, I should be feeling super. All I am now is sticky. Relax Lady Lu, I spilled a soda and didn’t shower after, only changed my clothes.

Something I won’t be doing a lot of this coming WEEK as I checked my Day Job schedule. I don’t want to be every other week Will. I have seven days and not like when I’m there, trying to make it only another day. Okay, the question becomes, what am I going to do with them. I should say something to my friend. I’m still no saint, but I’ve spent 24 days, not playing Shaft if you know what I mean. Some might say I should seek salvation, or should I trust that my story will save me these days.

Tomorrow I will tell myself to be better. Yeah, then I’ll do something silly instead of singing, “I can’t live my life This Way.” What about my son? I should get up right now and walk in the sunshine because, how long has this conversation taken. Oh, you mean between looking up porn and song lyrics. Wanting to be a saint but living as a sinner. I’m seeing the destruction of the country as I’m surfing YouTube as per usual.

I say, don’t be weak. Will, Don’t Be WEEK Will.

I Will Have No Fear