Tag: Sleep

Lesson 126 ~What’s One More Hour~

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One more hour, now tell me what are you going to do with it, other than breathing I have no clue and I don’t want to lie to you or to myself as if I’ll be looking back at this at some point. What’s One More Hour, really?

Saturday, November 4, 2017

Lesson 126 ~What’s One More Hour~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear but one more hour to try and convince myself of that, to think I keep asking for more time and then how do I spend it, well we’re here aren’t we? How many more hours shall I waste, excusing my day job which is the biggest time suck and then the time it takes to recover as though I’ve been through Hell and haven’t I?

That’s already two questions and I propose a third… what the Hell am I doing with my life, how quickly I forget which is why I keep a journal and nobody ever reads it, I’m a secret even from myself. If it’s not my body asking for more downtime, it’s my mind being left in a fog, I couldn’t hold on to a thought for the life of me. Am I once again suicidal, that’s usually a given but I am practicing a lot, what’s with all the sleep again?

Death, of course, is inevitable but so is Black Friday, a day that’s slightly better than the worse day of my entire life and last year was not a picnic. We also have another anniversary of the 5th of November, to think I almost forgot about “Senseless” and will I be telling, you know who about that past sin of mine? Of course, the simplest solution is just to work now and maybe, just maybe, there will be time enough at last, as though I was a Mr. Henry Bemis.

For being so obsessed with time as I am, I can’t help but waste it, even this moment, and I don’t mean talking to you I mean just doing what I claim to enjoy, to like, dare I say, love? I’ve spent today doing everything else saying that once it gets done I can write, cleaning my inbox, working on playlists, trying to organize everything but my words as again you can see right here.

As they say be careful what you wish for, more time, more excuses, more sleep, more dread, I can fill that time with anything and everything and then you wonder why I need to rest. Another saying, many hands make light work and yes Luna I know what that really means but how many clocks do I have and less time, what’s one more hour?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 108 ~And Maybe I Snore~

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To someone so I won’t have to dream alone someday, that is when I do dream; sleep, more like the walking dead these days and I’m looking for that perfect zombie apocalypse partner. And Maybe I Snore but I haven’t had anyone to tell me.

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Lesson 108 ~And Maybe I Snore~

Dear Future Wife,
It’s a valid question if I snore or not, I’m sure before we take such a step you’ll have plenty of chances to learn the truth of this. I can tell you with utmost certainty that I sleep like a log, I get up for two things in no particular order, work, the dog, and you, any other time I’ll probably be dead to the whole world.

People can be exhausting but with you, as corny as this might sound, you have to be the dream, honestly, as much as I sleep I don’t find many opportunities to dream because I’m searching for you and when we’re together… I don’t want to miss a thing and no I don’t sing in my sleep and I’m pretty sure I don’t talk, at least the last time I recall I woke up rattling off cheat codes to Star Wars: Rogue Squadron. I think you’re pretty used to the quiet when it comes to me, more than a quirk, or a habit, a necessity because yes, people take a lot out of me but you…

On one hand, I would say you wake me up to everything in this world and I’ll never get bored and on the other, you can find both my love and my trust in you as I lie here. There is only one other who has ever known this and you’ll find him at the foot of the bed curled up, standing guard, or simply watching TV when I’m out like a light or trying to read. Sharing my bed, I swear that dog must trust you, he’ll get used to you, and he sleeps as much as I do, I can’t help but wonder what he’ll do with you around and me lying here.

I have always imagined that we’ll have lots more to do but nothing makes me happier than to lie here next to you, reading until we can’t hold up a book, watching a movie and knowing we’ll have to watch the whole thing tomorrow, or listening to our playlist on a Saturday morning for a few hours. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy being in bed for other things and you won’t ever have to worry about a cup of coffee, though I’ll buy you a machine if you like, I’ve never been one to indulge myself.

And maybe I snore, I’m still waiting to confirm that but I look forward to the day we find out, someday, how long until then?

Lesson 074 ~Don’t Lie for Me~

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How’s Will doing today, it’s not that I even have to take part in the conversation, I could lie in bed and they could live forever, lying long after I’m gone and I’m sure you have been getting this question yourself maybe. Don’t Lie for Me.

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Lesson 074 ~Don’t Lie for Me~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear and no sleep if Braxton has anything to say about it, hopping right into the lesson today, “no ifs, ands, or buts”, now about lies though? Talking about ulterior motives, sometimes Braxton is too smart for his own good, he lies in my spot but not out of love but to make sure I can’t crawl back into bed, he lies down when I’m eating not out of obedience, he knows that he is often rewarded for not begging, so on and so forth usually.

I know that sounds stupid I know but I wonder how many people lie to me for similar reasons, friends you know that dare I say like me for me? Of course, a running theme of mine has been I don’t even know who I am myself and when I behave differently, well as they say, with friends like these who needs enemies? A friend told me, that they have a file on me, my school, the police, the whole damn internet which must be so incredibly confused but I wish I knew what they say about me at work.

“Some of the most successful relationships are based on lies and deceit. Since that’s where they usually end up anyway, it’s a logical place to start.” Lord of War (2005)

How about the fact that I’m my own worst enemy and I lie (asleep) not because of depression but because it’s the only time, said enemy gives me a break? When I finally take “The Big Sleep”, I hope they won’t lie about my life, another reason to write, so people can’t lie, no Luna I want people tossing and turning, I want them up in arms, or anything else. These words may lie on the page but it will be people that will decide the truth or the lie, but don’t we all really?

“What’s the threat? We all sell out every day, might as well be on the winning team.” They Live (1988)

We lie about the people we’re with, support friends even when better friends know better, at work they build you up on lies, surrounded by air while you’re lying in the dirt, at the end of the day is six feet enough. Of course Braxton has the best excuse and I have learned to speak his language but it’s people Luna, and in a way I guess they can’t help it, as I said I don’t know me so they can’t know me but it’s their stories, the weight of it all, I can’t take.

So what have I learned today, maybe it’s the Will said this, Will feels that Will looks like… stuff at work are just people again lying about me or lying for me, this person they have never even met and so Don’t Lie for Me.”

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 073 ~Bursting At The Seams~

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Things I’m not into, talking in my sleep or self- harm and yet a word came out and how does one go about cutting the back of their own neck. “Bursting At The Seams”, it’s tearing me apart Luna or something like that I suspect, any thoughts?

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Lesson 073 ~Bursting At The Seams~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear, I don’t normally talk in my sleep but I swear right on cue as the alarms began buzzing the word “burst” was on my lips and I can’t fathom why? Is this going to be one of those nonsensical posts which just makes no sense and is better left screamed into a pillow, now where is the fun in that?

Speaking of which, when was the last time that I screamed ever, I was on the verge, and this is one of those things that just doesn’t do well in print, is that why I want to be louder, get others to do it for me, maybe I need some godawful tragedy. Am I that much of a heartless bastard, I already told you, I’ve been forgetting things, like having a stake in Hurricane Irma, hell I don’t but I still remember exactly where I was when 9/11 happened, haven’t I been talking about the days of “Sapphire”. Yet another reason I talk to you, because all my crap seems juvenile, compared to the greater troubles of the universe right?

Which gets us back to today’s lesson and how it must have taken a hell of a lot to get that one word out of me in my sleep, something out loud with nothing but Braxton to hear me and between me, you, and him we’re great listeners but not such smooth talkers. How about talking in general because I can’t figure out how I got the cut on the back of my neck, I mean it’s easy to say that Braxton did but I can’t confirm it. I came up with a joke today that either my dog or my bitch did it but that’s exactly the type of humor that gets you fired and I was tempting fate

I was on the cusp though Lady Lu, I could feel it in my bones, I mean how my novel is so bloated, I come up with excuses by the truck load to not talk, not in front of customers, chicken biscuits, and other people have their worries. The mask is starting to slip again, I kept quiet around one manager and another saw, a bit of my face too.

So what have I learned today or rather thought… maybe something inside me is trying to get out, and if I can’t find my voice, damn censorship but something is truly Bursting at The Seams.

I Will Have No Fear

In the Middle of a Queen… Sized Bed

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Having the whole bed to oneself can get lonely and they say you sleep better by yourself anyway and the dog doesn’t try to hog the sheets. I’ll pick a side but I should focus on finding a girl first I suppose. In the Middle of a Queen… Sized Bed

And there’s no lying here in limbo

But I want to know

Who lies on the next pillow

or if you’re even there at all

Should I tumble, should I fall

not if I knew the way

To love you

So love me like you do

You can’t be too far

 

Just the left side of the bed

A genie in a bottle

My heroine from what novel…

 

Maybe I’ll guess right

Not falling off the edge of the world

Find my arms around the perfect girl

 

Because no one’s here to sleep

When love’s a possibility…

 

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

 

Inspired by: Mia Rose, Jimmy Cliff “Sitting In Limbo”, Foreigner “I Want To Know What Love Is”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, Meghan Trainor “Dear Future Husband”, Christina Aguilera “Genie In A Bottle”, (Several Fictional Heroines), Naughty Boy Ft. Bastille “No One’s Here To Sleep”, and Lykke Li “Possibility”

 

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgQyckgZ0jQ

Mia Rose 003

A Few Feet Less of Love

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I’ve said often enough that love… heart skips a beat, breathless, weak in the knees, falling, that bit of rigor mortis all guys get is like death; why am I looking for a killer? “A Few Feet Less of Love”, I want more than my two, four, more than six?

Two feet is just not enough

But I have never played twenty toes

Is this love

I’ll tell you what I know

 

My dog keeps his spot

Unless you and me happen to be…

“Well why not?”

Ravishment, Role Play, Orgy

 

Or we pretend that we’re dead

Because no one’s here to sleep

When you can love me like you do… instead

Love… a feeling of being six feet deep

 

Or not… Ms. Hot as Hell

 

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

 

Inspired by: Brittany Anne Pirtle – Emily… Power Rangers Samurai, Whitesnake “Is This Love”, L7 “Pretend We’re Dead”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, and Brother Love “Summertime”

 

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-GZdGYH93Kg

Saturday, August 08, 2015 Name - Brittany Anne Pirtle a.k.a. Emily, Yellow Ranger… Power Rangers Samurai