Chronicle 115 ~Aw Hell Angels, Behave~

A boot stamping on a human face forever? I’m sure the Shoe Person was wearing sneakers, and the jury is still out when it comes to me being human. A worm, a wuss, worthless. So yeah, you have my work week, but I have an angel. Aw Hell Angels, Behave.

Sunday, October 24, 2021

Chronicle 115 ~Aw Hell Angels, Behave~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, while you still have never hailed a cab. You’ve never sung Hail to the Chief. Seeing Hell?

Like every other week, that would be a yes. In a way, it’s nice to rise from the Ninth Circle and your Treachery to be somewhat in the Fifth. As Drake says, “I got enemies, got a lot of enemies. Got a lot of people tryna drain me of my energy.” Right now, you’re alone. That’s what’s so fucked up about this. Fucking Day Job. You should watch your language; Braxton is listening, but we’ll get to that. The two things you’re more concerned about in the land of the living is one, “I got girls in real life tryna fuck up my day.” Flooring. Dammit, why can’t you let that go already? Well, I didn’t. Two is yourself, looking at these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Kama Sutra Sex Guide for Couples, Samantha Mandala
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“It’s too cold outside, For angels to fly.” That’s why everyone is stepping on you this week, or they will be. The Shoe Manager is no fucking angel. Language! The supervisor, the manager, there is no one. The Bible says something about finding righteous people. Now let’s be clear, this isn’t your PRIDE speaking. Without a doubt, you’re going to… “You’re in Hell, this is Hell now, you’re in Hell.’ Yeah, paraphrasing Dot Allison’s “Colour Me.” That has been another earworm of mine, and I’m glad you found it. One less thing to worry about, congratulations. How long has your wrath relented? All good things. Nothing has been good, to be honest. You realize why Republicans adore forgetfulness, fury, and fucking Stupidity. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Dystopian Girls 2
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

You should add having Braxton back or getting another fur-baby to the list. The only thing that got me through this week of humiliations galore is Routine. Braxton is dead. The pain to trump all other hurts, humiliations, and you’re hoping horniness. To be a monk again. It wasn’t trying to get into Heaven but instead your punishment, like sleep. I didn’t buy stairs for Braxton, and he learned how to fly. He’s flying now. When I didn’t want to walk, I brought food home, so B III wanted to eat. He’s dying; you’re sleeping. I don’t have any advice for you but to ask Braxton for courage instead of your condemnation. Want to know if God exists? For Braxton, Women, Aw Hell Angels, Behave.

If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face—for ever.
― George Orwell, 1984

266 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 114 ~No, Not The B’s~

The bed’s not a mess, but then again, I might have to make it to see a difference. As if anything makes a difference when one political supports the Nazis. The years before, when I had a girl of the week, Anya, Panam, Jen. B’s still gone. No, Not The B’s

Saturday, October 23, 2021

Chronicle 114 ~No, Not The B’s~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, meaning I’d buy a safe place for animals not lucky like B. Blue Pills and Bullets.

The places my mind goes. Last night I didn’t dream about Braxton. But the dream I did have. Now Lu, like everything else in my life, it’s second-rate, second-best, and didn’t allow a second round. Let’s say I should call a physician as it lasted over four hours. Lady Lu, living in a would-be tyranny thanks to the Republican Party. That’s not to say I like the Democrats either. Um, M Anime is all for Anarchy but in a peaceful sort of way. Anyway, so my dream was of Wolfenstein, well, Anya Oliwa-Blazkowicz, to be specific. She wasn’t the only one; there was Panam Palmer from Cyberpunk 2077. And Jennifer Mallick, aka “Huck” TWD World Beyond. There were a few more. But leaving it there.

So as the song goes, AHEM, Lady Gaga “Sexxx Dreams.” This might explain why I didn’t get off on it. Despite how long I lounged around in bed. I still am at 7:20. It would have been something if I were only watching the performance, but I was “Begging,” Lunalesca. Did I mention my ears are being assaulted by everything? Okay, love the music, yup. Lunalesca, if you didn’t know, the Nazis that I’ve often read about are here, Republicans. Oh, there’s the Alec Baldwin shooting. It’s been on my mind. Shutting everything off. Ain’t that the dream? I wish I had thought about that yesterday. No, I save all my wishes for Braxton to come home. Or to go trust that chick from Facebook.

Hell, I wish I could enact a punishment that I know I deserve for B III. I’m a weak man. Always under the influence of a pair of breasts, boobs, books talking about them, hmm? Always at the mercy of bucks, bills, benjamins. Speaking of which, an errand for today. Always afraid of bullets, ballistics, busting a cap as the kids say nowadays? Staying away. Better an excursion to the bank than being with a weapon I shouldn’t touch, definitely. There’s the other weapon poking up, and it hasn’t even been twenty-four hours, damn it. As I said, the dreams. If I dreamed of Braxton, I’d be bawling my eyes out, which will happen sometime today. Instead, my balls are useless. No, Not The B’s

265 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 109 ~Beasts Don’t Kill For Sport~

I don’t care for hunting. For food, okay. But killing majestic beasts as you want to man-up or because it’s Human Nature. The Most Dangerous Game? The only “life” I’ve taken had four legs and loved me the most. Humans eww. Beasts Don’t Kill For Sport

Monday, October 18, 2021

Chronicle 109 ~Beasts Don’t Kill For Sport~

Two-Hundred And Tenth Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I don’t hunt people. On the one hand, some girls disagree. On the other, my aunt.

She for sure thought I was going to be a supervillain and wanted to destroy the planet. Me, the guy that’s so afraid to be in charge at work. Who’s thinking about every little thing that he screwed up the last time he was there? What did she know, considering…? Well, we won’t get into that. Let’s say that I haven’t killed anybody. Wait, no, scratch that. The things I can no longer speak. I have never been in a car wreck, but that changed some months back. Yeah, remember, Sunday, January 31, 2021, I killed my best friend, Braxton. A dangerous thought of what I wanted before I knew Braxton was dying, so I won’t voice it. Only if anyone deserves “something” that’s me.

Hell, I ain’t worth much except to a scammer. I swear I like books, but how many people have I had to block on Goodreads? While we’re on the subject, what am I reading now? In case you didn’t know, AHEM “Time-Travel.” Today is Saturday which means, as always, this week is going to suck. So again, what will I be thinking about in Hell? Dystopian Girls 2? Mason doesn’t hunt for girls but somehow finds them. Or speak of some tiddies, and they appear. A.J. Markam’s books have me looking up the Kama Sutra. There are also more Harem Romances. Hunting, Looking, Stalking, as I told Lady Luna today, I’m lost. I’m not chasing anything but my destruction. my Lazy Ass, come Find Me.

For the record, I don’t care for hunting. Unless we’re talking about something like Squid Game where things are “equal.” Humanity has lost sight of that. Now, Braxton, he was my pack, and I did what I did to make sure he would live… Other people, why are they there? That’s why the world is so dangerous. It’s all one big game of “Who’s The Better Killer.” We’re all fighting the same enemy, people, that is. One man said it was Hate, but no, Madam, you start at the root, and that is Fear. Braxton feared nothing… Well, his own kind, leaving me, and then only me. I killed and got nothing for it. Beasts have reasons, yet people survive. Beasts Don’t Kill For Sport.

260 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 108 ~Listen To That B~

When B was here, he’d Boss me around. My second Best Friend doesn’t, but I do listen to her. And then there are so many boobs, in particular, Blaze because I’ve been hearing the Streets of Rage 2 Boss Fight Music since Thurs. C’mon, Listen To That B.

Sunday, October 17, 2021

Chronicle 108 ~Listen To That B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, so when are you going to start listening to me. I say too much, not enough, whatever.

Yeah, that’s right, you can say “whatever.” It stills boils the blood when you think about the ASM. Or chills it considering you were scared to death this morning. You didn’t even know what day it was. Talk about tired. All you want to do is sleep. Can’t blame you. Life should come with Boss Music, so you know what you’re getting into. I know you have been waiting to get that one off your chest, SIGH. For days I’ve had an earworm of “Never Return Alive” from Streets of Rage 2. It fits well with Gi-hun and Sang-woo. Squid Game’s final Boss Battle. I watched that; the day I got promoted, and now you have to deal with it. That and Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Dystopian Girls (1)
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

As always, I owe you an apology and my condolences. Only you don’t want to hear them ever. Doesn’t do you any good, and by this time next week, you’ll do the same. Sundays suck. I could offer you some relief in the form of Blaze Fielding. Um, Streets of Rage 2; proof in some way that the past was not a complete shit-show. Close, very near, but not complete. Better I am silent, though as you were. I swear you were up by 7:00 AM and didn’t make it one hour before you fell to exhaustion. The horrors of today but then, tomorrow, tomorrow. You don’t want to hear about it. Braxton’s barking was much better with you sitting here with Six Impossible Things.

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Kama Sutra Sex Guide for Couples, Samantha Mandala
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Want to hear about the money you’ll be making now? Should you endure and survive? What about the crunch of an alarm clock if you decided to do something extraordinary? Lying to yourself, for it won’t be fantastic, and you’re not getting up anytime soon. Braxton isn’t here, and he gave the best motivational speeches. Will you listen on Spotify? Hell, you should be listening to a hammer driving in nails for Braxton’s pictures, correct? Yeah, if anything, friend, you want to drift into the oblivion of Squid Game Reactions. Perhaps you should try out your new Boss rank right now and get your bitch ass up? Only it’s cold, and that is only a sign of Fall and your Treachery. Listen To That B

259 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 107 ~To B The Boss~

I got soul, but I’m not a soldier, which explains why I never made it in the Navy or the Army. I was a Dad, but where’s my son? Now somebody wants me to be the boss, and I think about how much I effed up Thursday. Me being in charge, “To B The Boss.”

Saturday, October 16, 2021

Chronicle 107 ~To B The Boss~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which makes me “The Man.” Hell, I’m a man, I keep telling myself. The world disagrees.

Now I’m not in the LGBTQ community though I support it. God only knows the number of friends titties I want to see, SIGH. Braxton was enamored with Carolina Bound’s. Some things I couldn’t give my son. I wish he had met his stepmom. But “How To Be The Man.” Day one when B and I found ourselves on the porch of this place. I hugged my boy, and I said, “we have to look out for each other. It’s only us now.” Oh, and now I have one bedroom made into a Den. The second one is The Library/B III’s Room. Uh yeah, family. I’ve said and not to sound like “idgit” Marjorie Taylor Greene but being a father is the epitome of manhood.

It was/is the most tremendous honor, privilege, duty of my life. Thou Art Courageous to take up such a task. Great men do not seek power; it is thrust upon them. Before I rip off another game or show, do you remember Little B jumping into the car choosing me? Lunalesca, I picked him the moment I saw him in my Old Man’s hands. Hell, I don’t know what to do with myself, but it was effortless with B III. Love. That’s why I’m so lost. I don’t love myself, and while I care for my friends, when I’m not staring at their tiddies. Yeah, I should stop watching Emily. Anyway, I refuse to lead anyone else to ruin, to death, or worse, my STUPIDITY.

That’s why this boss man stuff has me so terrified. It’s not like I’ve even acted on anything; I only got the promotion Thursday. It took me fifteen years to fail Braxton. I hear you, Lady Lu, that was old age. We’re talking what a few months here. Humiliations Galore. Yesterday I was looking over the schedule thinking as soon as I saw my position… Lunalesca, I didn’t go crawling into the bed, but again I failed six impossible things. Braxton and I knew Yabbos could fix anything. Boobs and chocolate before The End, ha. It would have been the least I could do as his Daddy. As his boss? My boy led me through life. My Turn To B III. To B The Boss

258 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 102 ~Perfection Is Forged Through Hell~

In a song, there’s the line “the road to Heaven, is paved through Hell.” Dante had Virgil, and I had B, and the clear path has been lost. My boy wouldn’t go to Hell unless Cerberus retired. Plus, B III was perfect. “Perfection Is Forged Through Hell”

Monday, October 11, 2021

Chronicle 102 ~Perfection Is Forged Through Hell~

Two-Hundred And Ninth Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now. If the current crop of billionaires is any sign, I know where I’m going. I deserve it.

Seeing as how we’re talking on a Sunday, you know where I’ll be. It’s not going to Hell but more like going through the different circles. Of course, when I meet my demise, I will see Circle Nine for my Treachery. I’m sure you’re asking, aren’t you an atheist friend? Where’s Braxton in all this? How many groups am I a part of telling me that my son has crossed the Rainbow Bridge? He’s on it or waiting for me? Now I could burst out singing, I got Faith of the Heart. As far as God is concerned, I think I understand, Madam Justice. One more reason I’m going to Hell. Because what if anything do I conceive, hmm? For one, perfection lies in Hell.

Not my son Braxton. He would want to be where I am, so I tried to clean up my act. With what I did to him, taking his life, and yes, I’ve heard it all. It was an act of love, kindness, mercy. In my eyes, B was perfect but did he ask for mercy, freedom? B asked for Home. So this leads me back to God, and no, not like that. While I’m busy ripping off movies like Braveheart, how about The Ten Commandments. It’s like I’m Moses in the burning desert. I should look up how long Moses was in the wilderness. I have 253 Days of experience. Is “God” preparing me for a purpose? One that I could not share with Braxton.

It’s not OnlyFans for sure, but his cute face would have more fans than me. Hell, while I’ve been sitting here at the dining room table, I’ve gotten all sorts of ideas. Yeah, it ain’t writing, Burning paper, another taste of Hell. I’ll be amazed if I’m prepared… Day Job. They have said that the Squid Game is a look at Hell. Oh my took the guy ten years, ha. There’s my Envy popping up. I have had the Day Job for a decade, and what do I have, J? Even now, I could sit right in the Den and not do a damn thing. Cocoon myself in the Bed. Treachery is ice cold, you know, that is my punishment. Perfection Is Forged Through Hell

253 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 101 ~B It Room 101~

Room 101, like Asgard, is not a place. The bed could be Room 101 when I want to leave it, but I’m too tired. It’s the feeling behind a closed-door knowing B’s not beyond or way beyond. It’s the knowing I have to go to the Day Job. B It Room 101.

Sunday, October 10, 2021

Chronicle 101 ~B It Room 101~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and when you are, you’ll want a home of your own. Red Room, Library, Study, Sex Dungeon…

This house is not a home. Hell, it’s not even your house, and I’m sorry to be so negative. All I offer is the truth, nothing more. The day always started off better with a puppy stepping on your head. No, not any puppy but Braxton. Living is torturous enough. Without B III and even yesterday at PetSmart, they didn’t have the fur-babies out there. I swear the things that become routine. I’m not talking about sleeping in late. Do you see what time it is, 5:40 AM, and what time you were supposed to be up? Desiring a paycheck? Who are you, Winston Smith, waiting for that bullet as you profess your love for Big Brother. More like the Day Job. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Succubus 7 Fairy Tale ― A LitRPG Series
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I wish I could tell you that I have finished this list. Yeah, I’m not funny; trying not to be. How about saying my betrayal isn’t possible? That’s right, where is Braxton? My Day Job? And speaking of which, dammit, you know that this week like others, will always suck. Only don’t go asking for the caged rats. As much as you deserve it for B. 6 hrs., my boy. I’ve been trying to get you ready with all my studies of torture, Squid Game, Would You Rather, 1984, and the like. Again we’re 6 hrs in, and you see the world continues to Hell. You know your sins, Treachery, Lust, Sloth, Anger, Pride. It seems you’re moving to Envy, Fraud. Better Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading (To Be Determined)
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Of course, you have no idea how you will overcome any of it. The last thing you need is a fur-baby in the mix. I talked about a dream I had the night before last, and now you know what it meant. I told Carolina Bound as much. Oh, she is also on your Onlyfans. Look at you, man, everyone else does, and what do they see? There is always another reason to miss B III. For being so small, he was easy to hide behind. Plus, with all that fur flying, it was better to keep one’s clothes on. Why look at the last man on earth? And no, not everyone considers you as such. Fading away, an Unperson, STOP. B It Room 101

252 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 100 ~Not For The B’s~

Once a buzzing in the walls was the worst of my problems. I said, “eff them Bees.” It was one of the neighbors, though, and we would all be in trouble without the bees. But for me without B III… books, boobs, bucks, it doesn’t matter, Not For The B’s

Saturday, October 9, 2021

Chronicle 100 ~Not For The B’s~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I’ll tell you I would help more animals than people. Oh yeah, my Republican tendencies…

I had a dream as I continued to be a lazy ass this morning. Yeah, I got up at 4:00 AM but slept an extra hour. I’d say, cut me some slack, but I don’t deserve it. At least I’m not sitting in bed buck-ass naked looking for an excuse to do laundry today. I’m back to, day one Lunalesca. So my dream. There was a brown dog, much darker than my Braxton, growling at me that I was trying to fight off. It was with my left arm, you know where I keep planning on getting my tattoo for B. She was a bitch too. I do mean that in dog terms, of course. Well, did I die, you want to ask Lady Lu?

Let’s say; I’m not in the mood to go see the doggies. But it’s Saturday, I’ll stick to the routine. Speaking of Republican tendencies or a white man who leaves the one they love the most. The 30th, remember. “First let me explain that I’m just a black man,” as the song goes, Lady Lu. That’s the one thing I can’t forget in this world. There’s reading the Succubus series. Lunalesca, there are the books. The financial sort that has been kicking my ass some days. What about my book? I should be cheating, as NaNoWriMo starts in November, Lady Lu. More books, but how have I been worried about making money. Yesterday, doing shit that I would never let Braxton see or Beatrice either.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dq6ZSRMhetE

I’m sticking with that name, Beatrice, as in Dante’s Inferno. If I see a brown dog today, I’m steering clear. Can I get more Republican, ha? Didn’t I use to say life is all about Bucks, Babes, and Bullets? Bullion, Biology, Boobs; better Bombs, Brunettes, Burials? Braxton should have always come first, and he did. I keep telling myself that falsehood? I can’t keep my boner in my pants, I refuse to work on my book, and where are all the bucks. Um, ok, in the piggy bank in “Squid Game,” along with people’s brains going everywhere. Living in a world that every day I see more and more that’s doomed. My apocalypse partner… Braxton is dead. Supporting NaNoWriMo… nope, I should help keep the Bees. Not For The B’s.

251 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 095 ~Knocking, Takes Finesse, Doors, Boots~

I’ll show you a door; you’re the one who has to walk through. I’d tell B I’d never leave for the Day Job again. I hate that door; B hated car doors. Did he know neither of us would look at the front door the same? Knocking Takes Finesse, Doors, Boots

Monday, October 4, 2021

Chronicle 095 ~Knocking, Takes Finesse, Doors, Boots~

Two-Hundred And Eighth Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I can afford one of those RING doorbells. Only people knocking here want my money.

Hell, the only doors I’m knocking on are for places I don’t want to be. Well, if you’re destined for Hell, you might as well get there early. You know I hate the crowds, Madam. I got the sins, no doubt. Yet the fact we’re here now J, on the 2nd ha-ha. Sigh Time Travel. That’s sort of what the Den has become. My Time Machine. I ain’t the smartest man (not STUPID). But working the thermostat, managing money, being a good Daddy. The Den is the warmest room in the house with the door closed. Today I miss Braxton’s scratching. I only shut it when he was here because I was mad. Otherwise, with his warmth… Cold, what Cold? I can’t feel a thing.

Hell, I deserve to get sick. I remember sitting there, my feet frozen in place and at the same time beating a path straight to Hell. As the needles took B; disease, vaccine, rejected me. So I won’t get COVID; for once, I was hoping the Republicans were right, and I would die. It’s not like I’m getting laid anytime soon. Knocking boots, as the kids would say. I don’t wear them or anything else, considering what I’m doing. I did have dreams of being a porn star once upon a time. For right now, I want to stay behind closed doors in the Den. Here I am, though, talking to you today because of all the knocking I’ll do. That I’ve done already, Madam.

Edward Norton kicked his own ass in Fight Club. Ain’t that something, Madam. I forgot knocking heads, and somehow the ASM reminds me every time I see his fucking face. Only I never grew into a violent person except against myself. I skipped all the self-harm and went right to, let’s say, the heart of the matter. Even that I fucked up. As for fighting? Every day I’m and out for the count. Not today because I was talking to Lady Lu about a lack of sleep being punishment. We’ll see how long this lasts. Not to Sunday the 3rd. Promises and a Penis take finessing too. Pardon my language today. Am I good at any of this? Opening doors? Knocking Takes Finesse, Doors, Boots

246 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 094 ~Someday B It Sunday~

Sunday was his last day. A case of the Mondays. Taco Tuesday, do they still have nacho fries? Hump Day. Thursday, I knew he was sick. Working for the weekend. Saturday night’s not alright and repeat. Hell is repetition. Someday B It Sunday.

Sunday, October 3, 2021

Chronicle 094 ~Someday B It Sunday~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you could be too but not today. Monday would help because I’m not going to be.

If it’s any consolation, I did get more work done yesterday, despite all my tears. I’m sorry I chased Carolina Bound off (for the moment…). Hell, I apologize for using M Anime as an excuse. If I paid as much attention to Braxton as I did Books, Boobs, and Bedrooms. Tell you what, I am proud that here you are on another Off Day at 4:00 AM. Not the floor. How bad do you want to take yourself back to bed… not involving OnlyFans mischief? Do you have what it takes to go to the dining room when the time comes; B III’s meds? How many Sundays has it been? In Days, it’s been 245. The worse part of a year for Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Connected Souls (Short)
    Completed
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Partial
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
    Failed
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I told you I wouldn’t be of much help. To help yourself when you couldn’t do anything for your son. I swear Sundays are cursed days. Tupac wrote, “cause even our birthdays is cursed days.” On that note, you hate E-Day. Braxton had Feb 13th, but dying on a Sunday. Sunday always meant church, threats from your father. Awaiting all the horrors that were to come during the week. B III’s dead. Anything that happens this week can’t top that. The Walking Dead is coming on tonight; wrestling sometimes. With how I felt last night (Carolina Reaper Wings…). Today you’re doing pretty damn awesome physically. Only you’ll be back to routine but didn’t Stephen King say, that’s what Hell is, repetition, plus Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Finishing Reading Succubus 7 Fairy Tale ― A LitRPG Series
  2. I AM Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I AM Sending Gulp Off To Be Published SIGH
  4. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL Work On Getting My Tattoo Of B III
  6. I WILL Be The Man My Son Thinks I Am

The sad thing is it could be worse… Um no? Thinking such a thing always looks like a step towards Acceptance. Nothing is worse than Braxton being gone. Another life? Every week is filled with, as always, Humiliations Galore. Hell, the highlights include praying if there is a God that you don’t wake up. Fast food might kill you. Sleeping. Saturdays are always about betrayal. I told Carolina Bound about her boys Thor and Loki getting bigger, growing up without a home. This house isn’t home. Not without B III. Sundays though, fuck, you have so many girls to talk to because this week is going to suck. Listen to your motivations, but you know like Fallout, War, War Never Changes. Someday B It Sunday

245 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will