Log 098 ~The Dead Don’t Need Sympathy~

Why should I worry, rather why should I die, if anything people will still be in tears but most laughing I find annoying and I could do with a bit of peace; ha I was about to say in my life. The Dead Don’t Need Sympathy

Monday, October 7, 2019

Log 098 ~The Dead Don’t Need Sympathy~

Hundred And Fifth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now and still alive. Now I didn’t plan on writing this the day after The Walking Dead returned. Madam Justice, is there such a thing as fate? I didn’t plan on being alive this long, either. Why am I spoiling my good mood? I finished my first Audible book today. So I started listening to Dale Carnegie’s book. Am I worrying; I’m tired as all hell, but for the moment, I’m feeling glad. I guess feeling anything means well I’m still alive right?

When I’m at the Day Job I feel like I can’t breathe. My Firstborn has me rushing around, trying to catch my breath. Hell if I run my mouth at the Day Job, I fear I might overdose on the toxicity of my words. How about what Eric Thomas always says? Fall on your back, because if you can look up, you can get up. If I do sleep on my back it’s because I have work in the morning. Speaking of which, wasn’t I down on my belly kissing the boss’s shoes? If I’m not losing myself to weakness, how about horniness, Xev Bellringer? Okay, I said I’m not suicidal, but that’s okay because people kill me all the time. I don’t expect tears unless I make people laugh so hard. Of course, they’re people who think they can speak for me all the time. Those people, well damn, I don’t choose, I obey.

Madam Justice, there was a time in my life that I thought death was freedom. You know me and my music; as Tupac rapped, “we jump into another form of slavery.” For me that’s Depression and something’s leaking; blood, sweat, tears, and other bodily fluids. Now like I said I don’t expect tears, and this dead man doesn’t need them. You know I never kill myself in any of my stories either. I could be like one of those zombies that need BRAINS! If anything you know I hunger for flesh. I got a sixth sense for that, Girls, Girls, Girls. The truth is I want to live, but I get sympathy there too. Does it sound “deep,” while I’m burying myself to say the dead need peace? I guess I’m a greedy so and so Justice. I’m no Walker though sitting here in my bed.

No more tears for today. The Dead Don’t Need Sympathy.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 096 ~Alpha, Omega And Will~

The week before it was the Day Job, last week I needed to be a CEO, and this week, well with every Saturday it’s therapy with a bit of dream interpretation; beware hot brunettes, a new Asian girl, sex in general ha. “Alpha, Omega, And Will”

Saturday, October 5, 2019

Log 096 ~Alpha, Omega And Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and for once, I wasn’t dreaming for more. How am I ever supposed to stay motivated if I keep speaking like this, Lady Lu? I write the truth, and even Dennis Hof said, people, don’t change. Now I wonder is that what my dream was about last night. Now the Walking Dead starts tomorrow among other things. You remember Alpha don’t you but more so Lydia (Cassady McClincy). Here I am, with my weakness for a hot young brunette as always.

Once upon a time, it was Asian women. Now, this is more of a story for “Dirty Diana.” When I decided to “Come Up and Try My New Parts,” it was thanks to Victoria’s Secret catalogs. Still, it was something so “exotic about Asian women. My first real crush was Tina Nguyen (Tram-Anh Tran) from Ghostwriter. Sex and writing were tied up from an early age. When the Internet was born, one of my first searches was Princess Ayeka naked. Hell, that’s how I discovered Hentai. Now I’m a grown-ass man (LANGUAGE), and I’m still into Zone-Tan, the Hentai Key Girl, and Back Alley Hooker. Somehow I thought I moved on when I got “deep” ha into brunettes. Let me say again I believe all dreams contain messages, meanings, and the very best moans. So last night, it was an erotic smorgasbord of Asian women. I wake up this morning to discover Lydia has some Asian lineage inside her too.

Before I make a specific dick joke (LANGUAGE…), why is any of this important? You know I study dreams trying to prevent disaster. I talked about the new book I was reading that says you must live in Day-Tight Compartments. It also tells one to acknowledge the worst that can happen; you can move forward. My problem is I see the worse of others always. I then do things and think, oh fuck (LANGUAGE), for the tiniest “crimes.” Lady Luna it’s one reason I feel grimy. It’s my dirty dreams about Lydia, ravishing many hentai girls, and of course Maitland Ward. How about sexual Pinterest names for Olivia Holt? There was one particular redhead I had a board for, and I got so frightened I changed the name. Oh yeah, and locked it down too.

The beginning of life might be the end, meaning sex. Dreaming Alpha, Omega, And Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 094 ~Willing To Be Surprised~

The things that women do, hell Dennis Hof never had it easy with his business, and neither did his girls but where they found they found themselves, surprise, surprise, but what about myself? Willing To Be Surprised

Thursday, October 3, 2019

Log 094 ~Willing To Be Surprised~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, surprise, surprise. There was a time in my life when I wanted to be surprised on The Day. Yes, it’s October now, as the song goes, wake me up, when September ends. Well, you want to know what woke me up this morning? Of course, after my Firstborn’s walk and a promise of lunch. Maitland Ward, you know “Rachel” from Boy Meets World is getting naked or has according to my research. She’s doing a feature called “Drive” directed by Kayden Cross. Yes, I saw her naked too, yep porn.

One more reason I adore women, and yeah, I’m frightened somewhat. Now before you go calling me a punk, “I am not a coward,” thank you, Dale Gribble, or was that After Earth? Anyway even the great Dennis Hof said:

“To me, a woman is a goddess, and I can’t live in a godless world.”

Now I will never be a man of the “normal” faiths, but THEY talk about loving God and serving. Despite this, THEY still show surprise at “Acts of God.” So it is with women and me or even my taste. I don’t understand somethings women do, not that it’s bad. To this day I still remember when I talked MILF Dos into getting naked for me, wow. I haven’t spoken to “Okay” in ages, but she showed me a nude picture with no prompting. I could go on; the whole men and women can’t be friends theory I still hold.

Everybody remembers The Frappening. Dirty Diana, I still want to fuck Jennifer Lawrence. Another surprise this morning; what the fuck happened to Chloë Grace Moretz’s hair? The big question I should be asking is about myself? After a release, and no, I’m not getting back on Brainbuddy, I dwell on my path. Nothing has changed Dirty Diana; I’m still looking for models. One day I will own those brothels, strip club, studios, etc. Only once upon a time I was a guy merely writing poetry. I got more than enough for a lot more 100 poem compilations. What women will inspire my next erotic novel; NaNoWriMo is coming up in November. How can I be exhausted and full of energy at the same damn time?

I don’t get tired of women ever. Wasn’t I talking about being sick a day or so ago? My sex drive is too damn high, but that’s not a bad thing. Well, unless I’m talking to you, downloading TeenStarlet. Even now thinking about that “Kayden Kross Fucks In The Bathroom” scene. Oh yeah and Maitland Ward’s videos. I found Teen Topanga back in the day, of course not the actual actress but a good lookalike. Speaking of which I could go into parodies, cosplay, and everything in between, but I’m running late as is right. For once though it’s food. Only I still keep money in my wallet like the guy in “Street Blowjobs” Women SIGH Willing To Be Surprised.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 093 ~What The Health Will~

Last week I talked about living and this one I’m an obsessed zombie when I’m not out for the count, and while I’m all for flesh, I could go out and get some real food but everybody’s time is valuable, even mine. “What The Health Will.”

Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Log 093 ~What The Health Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Billionaire right now, and it’s funny that I chose a photo of Dampé The Grave Keeper last week. It’s not right of me to think or feel this way with my many motivations. Still, aren’t I allowed to feel sick, and it is my fault. See Inspector Echo; I do take responsibility. Only this doesn’t make me any less of a Scrooge. Yeah, I should shut up, we haven’t even seen Halloween. Not digging the Christmas stuff at the Day Job but the burial is underway these sick days.

Yesterday I said I wasn’t sick. Now tell that to the McChicken sandwich and fries. What about a whole mess of sour gummy bears? Again nobody’s fault but mine because in the words of Idiocracy, “I Like Money.” I also like Indiana Gone, routine, and self-harm. So where does the pain go, again I take you back to yesterday and my YouTube binge? Girls, Girls, Girls as the song goes, along with some cash. I fucked up Sunday (LANGUAGE). So am I official back to Frapping? Well, Monday I bought a subscription to TeenStarlet and got Dennis Hof’s book on Audible. I also quit BrainBuddy; what I wasn’t using it at all. If it’s not women, it’s sleep. Where has all my energy gone; back to looking up girls. Hell Inspector Echo I fell asleep in my hoodie and sweat pants, all the lights on.

Tuesday continued to be humiliation in both jobs. I still have a model to talk too. The thing is I know what’s going on next week. I have to read that other Dale Carnegie title “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living.” I was so exhausted I got the wrong book from Audible. Now before I continue my self-pitying, I will say that Norton let me down. I swear if it wasn’t the Facebook hack that scared me how about Norton’s services. I learned how to unsubscribe from Brainbuddy; I can cut off Norton’s extras. All this morning I was researching that. Okay Inspector Echo, full disclosure, Money Talks Taco Muncher and Dong Diner. I’m always good with the research, aren’t I? What about other people? How many Friend requests am I ignoring this time?

Now that’s sin above all else, and I’m sorry, Inspector Echo. It’s all about their time and mine as always. Only Will What The Health?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 091 ~Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost~

Almost doesn’t count, what about school, the things I didn’t want to learn I barely got by; if I so much as said “hi” that was a threat the way some tell it, so I had to stick to shadows which made it worse still. “Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost”

Monday, September 30, 2019

Log 091 ~Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost~

Hundred And Fourth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and also a time traveler. Yes, here we go again trying to stay ahead of the game. You know I say that, but I haven’t played Heavy Rain in about a month. Now you think I would be curious about how it ends; as if I don’t know. First off I don’t get interested, I get paranoid. Secondly my curiosity. Maybe any sign of interest is usually mistaken for something more sinister. Take, for example, my new page looking for models. A woman signs up she’s interested and then not, file deleted.

How about that time I got a hacking notice while hard tagging shoes? Hell, I was panicking calling the phone company about nothing. I mentioned modeling, and you’ve seen what a pretty girl does to me Madam Justice. I am proud to say that half of what I’ve written down today is pretty positive. The rest is from YouTube to TeenStarlet, and Xvideos. On top of my social anxiety and bipolar disorder, I could add ADHD. What, so I’m a doctor now; yeah I checked out WebMD? Now I could be too plugged into everything. I’m bound to get into trouble someday. I focus on three things Writing, Women, and Warfare, in nearly everything. Of course, you’ve seen my writing is going nowhere, and I don’t like hurting people. Well, outside of the bedroom, sadist and all so yes women.

I’m a massive fan of horror movies. In Log 90, I talked about zombies which are my favorites. Next would be the Saw franchise; I would be so dead. Any way you look at Freddy, Jason, Michael Myers, they don’t scare me. It’s never the scars, masks, or the weapons but what lies underneath. I look at my son, and he doesn’t hide a thing on his face. It’s when you keep digging, knowing he’s sick. Wanting to know anything is the worse type of torture and when you make the discovery? It’s why I should stick to porn hmm because I know plenty of pretty girls. The thing is contrary to my blog and every aspect of life I don’t want to hide. Doesn’t that make me a killer though because when you’re curious you’re alive? Hell, I should put that on my resume; a gravedigger, yep creepy right?

Digging holes but never filling, Curiosity Almost Kills You, Almost.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 089 ~Who’s The Boss Will~

Last week it was the idea of speaking at the Day Job, now I have to talk as the CEO of Second Circle Creations and as an author but as the song goes “Who gon’ pray for me?” Who’s The Boss Will, well I hate my managers, time to live the Dream Job

Saturday, September 28, 2019

Log 089 ~Who’s The Boss Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and I’ll be changing that come Sunday. One more thing in my pressing matters that I talked about yesterday. From being a slave to the Day Job. To stealing the plans for the Death Star, (my cash is in a Death Star). Then I am a friend to “Indiana Gone.” What about my Firstborn; now he is going to be pissed. All of that and now I have this moment. Well, minus the girl and getting up on time. Today though I don’t have time to lounge around for two hours.

Who’s the boss, well I did mention my Firstborn? He needed water, of course, so I stopped and got a bottle for myself. I cleaned his bathroom pad. In less than an hour he’ll be chomping at the bit for his walk. Parenthood but my child is the boss, and he knows of course. Okay in speaking of my dog what about the Basic Bitch (LANGUAGE)? I still hate to admit that I quit talking to you for so many years, Lady Luna. One girl calls me skeevy and here we are heading into the third year; what is the point? Hell, Porn has a point though I don’t have time for that right now either. Is it women or my penis that’s making the calls for me right now. I should say emails or texts, and there’s still time. Did I feel this way meeting Indiana Gone at first?

The Man In The Mirror is usually my Sunday gig. You know who I want to meet now though, The CEO of Second Circle Creations. He’s the man that writes the stories, picks the girls, directs the films, and God knows what else. Hell, I am not a man for prayer, but I could use some. I know plenty might say that about the men I look to as heroes. Lady Lu I’m not even getting that far right now, this is only a modeling job. Something I’m putting a lot of stake in and Tom Bilyeu would say the fear is right. It proves I care. Still a few parts of me wants to be the man that could win by words alone. Didn’t I say third year? I wish I could be like Katie O’Shaughnessy on YouTube. Now if I could do something beautiful and positive. My life, lust, Who’s The Boss Will?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 087 ~Wil’s Gift Of Gag~

These days you have to get everything in writing and on video, but still being a black man in America, hell a man like me, somethings, it’s better to keep your mouth shut and how I try. Will’s Gift Of Gag.

Thursday, September 26, 2019

Log 087 ~Wil’s Gift Of Gag~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but should I be spreading that around? Well, I got my first model interview and how long did it take me to tell her that? What about my first model period; as the song goes “I’m begging.” Hell when I first met “Indiana Gone” I took her to a place where you can’t talk. Relax Dirty Diana, it was too the movies and speaking of which, what have I been watching these days; um research?

Yeah, I still have MILF Dos’s videos, and the greatest thing ever is hearing her moan my name. Next to that would be all the messages my Gig has received. Of course as I said, only one of those has panned out. I talked to a would-be scammer for a while remember. Three promising women have yet to get back to me at all. Me and my big mouth doesn’t go with any job nowadays. I’m still a big believer in Co-Ed Confidential’s James when he said “vote with your crotch.” All the more I understand why I do what I sometimes do? If I wasn’t on NO FAP would I still feel the same way? Like Dennis Hof, most men nut and go to sleep. He went looking for the next party. Sex keeps most of us awake right? In those hours though I instead not be talking Diana.

Again while I praise voices raised in ecstasy, you know how I value silence. Take, for example, that girl in Black Widow Vol. 2. Now that was a neat little mouth toy they gave her when she was theirs. You know it could be my fear of saying something well; STUPID. I still hate that word but what do I have to offer; idiocy makes beauty downright atrocious. Am I not down to fuck an idiot? I believe Carlos Mencia said, “if you are a D, please don’t marry a D.” Not that I’m going that far, Dirty Diana. Why don’t I be the man who likes blowjobs? Could it explain the appeal of a songstress? I still have that fantasy of a woman with her panties in her mouth. How about this, do I fear rejection so much? MILF Dos took an excellent opportunity; this model gets an interview.

I should talk to someone, don’t you think Dirty Diana? Only Will’s Gift Of Gag.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 086 ~Will For A Living~

Thinking of the could be humiliations kept me from a real one; I’m not living a past life I’m living in the what-if, and probably the best thing of all is that is what I call this existence as a father, businessman, entrepreneur? “Will For A Living.”

Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Log 086 ~Will For A Living~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, but I’ll let somebody else handle the retail. For once, it would be nice to have a job where I don’t get sick every day. One where there isn’t any rage or I’m bored out of my mind. How about where I have enough to blow it on Hookers and Cocaine. I’m kidding of course Inspector Echo, but you know what isn’t a joke? Let’s see wasting most of a “Tuesday” afternoon, no. I got a message from a potential model today. Of all the things I organize in my life, women make me GASPS happy.

So yeah explain Melanie Rios, Abbey Brooks and Lane/Audrey Holiday. What about Kagney Linn Karter, Melody Parker, and that video of the girl with Uncle Harry. Hell, I wonder if he still alive; anyway Tia Monae, Cat Morris, Liz Vicious and Lizz Tayler? You know my grandfather was a P.I. Does it run in the family that’s how I’m so sure about my model? But she did fill out the form, so it wasn’t much tracking, but she’s the real deal. Now we get to the section of the story where I stumble, the return email. First I was late, still working out some kinks. Second, as always wondering; are you sure. Even if I wasn’t, this is getting in the door somewhat. Last I had two other girls and now that I know Craigslist wasn’t fucking up (LANGUAGE). Yeah, it was whatever I said.

I wish I could say I feel fantastic but notice that list of women. A miracle I’m still on NO FAP. Again it does beat going to the Day Job. Yes, one more sin imagining something worse. Oh like I’m not already a slave to my phone and tomorrow I’ll have to message to see what’s what. A job where I won’t have to feel ashamed every time I get out of bed. Where do I do most of my writing, and I’m still not at the dining room table. Didn’t even write that much today but I’m trying to stay one jump ahead. I might never write for Disney, but I have plenty of life goals. Tomorrow I could be a photographer or should I say I am, Law Of Attraction isn’t that right?

I am sorry though getting all excited, worried, and scared, but Will For A Living.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 084 ~When Does A King Kneel~

“There is a king in me” as the song goes or I should research a bit of history because it might be easier to find than the things I have been looking for on any given day; enough to bring anyone to their knees. “When Does A King Kneel”

Monday, September 23, 2019

Log 084 ~When Does A King Kneel~

Hundred And Third Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Millionaire right now and soon to be “Like A Boss” as the kids say nowadays. Not today and not tomorrow and yeah I hear you saying and why not. Too busy being a time traveler. Yes, I want to have that moment where The Day Job will be nothing but a horrible memory. I’m sure I will have a woman somewhere to thank for that luck. No, let’s call it something else, like perseverance. Now such a thing requires me to be on my feet or punching these keys daily.

Now’s not the time to sleep, so what else can I do Madam Justice? As the song goes, Run Boy Run, and we’ve talked about it stemming from fear. Eric Thomas says you have to attack the fight, but I still hate math class. Only when was I in a class last, and today (Sunday) I was only counting money. Of course, that leads me to research. If I’m not on the keys, I should be like Bill Gates and read books faster. I’ve been listening to way too many motivations last week, which leads me to my point. When does a king kneel, there is no porno for dummies (LANGUAGE). You know how I feel about words like that but back to the point. Madam Justice there is no master to teach me how. I wanted to go into stocks, but there are none, or I’m not looking hard enough. Of course, I’m looking for actresses, Saturday was bust.

Again I was on my knees this morning counting up the cash, so that’s why I’m starting with modeling. I have my Firstborn, so I’m always kneeling to clean up after the kid and cuddle. One should stop and smell the roses too or play games; I haven’t done either lately. No Madam Justice when I kneel, I’m hiding. Care to take a knee for a noble cause? Never I’m at the fucking Day Job (LANGUAGE). The man who would be king falls out of pain and service. Now I don’t mind service, but the question is how. Again I’m studying other artists on Patreon and adult entertainment. Why would anyone pay $75.00 for a naked character in something I’ve written myself? Do I believe people would fall so quickly, well haven’t I Madam Justice?

Am I a man hmm? When Does A King Kneel?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 082 ~Will Sell Those F-Bombs~

If I had to speak at the “Day Job” on the daily, it would be nothing more than obscenities; strangely enough, one job makes me want to drop those bombs, and another is only a colorful word. “Will Sell Those F-Bombs”

Saturday, September 21, 2019

Log 082 ~Will Sell Those F-Bombs~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but I’m not exactly the best salesman on Earth. Yes, I’ve read a bit more of Dennis Hof’s book, my second reading. Now he was far from perfect, but he loved to? Anyway, I’m still trying to keep my mind off that particular F. The thing is my life revolves around three. FEAR, FAILURE, and FEMALES, the order changing depending on my mood. So how is that mood right now; I wish I could practice another F, forgetfulness to be honest.

Let’s focus on FAILURE, and how so, it hasn’t even been twenty-four hours. Hell again with my motivations but shouldn’t I focus on gratitude. I’m grateful that I had the money to buy that file uploader. How about having the courage to forge down this path? It’s a mixed bag this, fake it till you make it approach. Of course, all the motivations say that you have to believe first and foremost. While I’m going off on phrasing, what about spending money to make it Lady Lu? In the book Think And Grow Rich or The Secret talked about you can’t control every thought but if you feel happy? Money and Friendship, I care for “Indiana Gone” but her wedding SIGH. I’m not experiencing the Fear but the expense of it all, being a man.

Rule 102 and 001, a man shouldn’t be afraid all of the time. FEAR is my constant and what gets me moving along. How much stuff did I have to get rid of only so I could add that upload form? What about the Craigslist Ad or even Facebook, afraid to be me and why?

Like Marcus put it “Bitches man” (LANGUAGE). Must I be so crass, I tell Cherry about language, there’s a time for it of course. Anyway, contrary to popular belief, I respect FEMALES. Nobody asks why I do what I do ever. I’ve said it before I’ve written for guys for their girls. The internet knows enrichment with porn. I’m not even going down that road at the moment, but yes, I like to add beauty to the world. Some like guns, some cars, and we all love a bit of money don’t we Lady Lu. Bullets, Booze, Bullion, and Babes, pick your poison. Like Nicolas Cage in Lord of War, I have to empty the plane and be a necessary evil. Will Sell Those F-Bombs.

I Will Have No Fear