Tag: Mistakes

Saga 068 ~B My Age V~

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Today is the second worse day of existence, E-Day. The first is the day B died. The third involves “Tifa Lockhart’s dress.” The fourth is starting the Day Job. But let’s focus on today or not. To not have to emerge or exist today being 38. B My Age V

Wednesday, September 7, 2022

Saga 068 ~B My Age V~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, at the age of 38. If that were true, then Happy E-Day. Of course, I’m not.

I should preface this because I’m writing on Sunday, September 4, 2022. You know I don’t want to do a damn thing on E-Day. Except that it vanishes. Hell! I need a break now, Inspector. But if I have any chance to … FUCK survive! The one thing I can’t fail at Inspector Echo. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I have to do something today. Air conditioning? The money I don’t have to help Virgil be more comfortable. And as for myself? Existence? Inspector, if I wanted to die, I could block my Olds’ numbers. Inevitable what’s coming. It’s only going to get worse. And without Braxton but with Virgil here. I should have thought about that. I’m amazed I rise every day.

Who knows, I might get lucky. We’re still dealing with the real-world Inspector Echo. Now that being said. As I spoke to my Future Wife, what do I want for E-Day, the 38th ha? The song says, “The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.” Inspector, to DIE. Simple and plain. I wake up on fire anyway, trying to comfort a puppy, don’t I? Speaking of a drooling dog, how about a drooling me? I’ve seen Braxton’s aunt Carolina naked, sure. Or at least her Yabbos. Either way, she won’t say anything about E-Day out of respect or forgetfulness. Then, of course, there’s Cherry and M Anime. Ha-Ha, that’s so funny. Cherry doesn’t know. M Anime… “Not That Kind” of girl.

Ok, that goes for both of them, to be honest. The other girls I know… or could pay for, um? Did I mention I’m right here with the door open to get air and help V with the heat? Yep. No money. But if I work today, I can get out of the house and find a fan or something. Echo, what will I do come the actual day? What about in the future as I do Endure and Survive? I looked up where I was last year. There were 37 things on that list, and not one was finished. Chronicle 068 ~B III The Emergence~. Lying, I did get a new battery. At my age, what have I done? To B My Age V

Chronicle 068 ~B III The Emergence~

584 Days Without B III, Day 025 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 061 ~B Nice, V’s Mad~

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Don’t write angry or do? I read before you should pick a subject you’re pissed about and use that as your catalyst. Black men, women, southern living, and a dog. Hell! Am I a Republican? But I’m not above the law of existence. “B Nice, V’s Mad.”

Wednesday, August 31, 2022

Saga 061 ~B Nice, V’s Mad~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and seeing how it’s only Friday, August 26, 2022; I’m still mad as Hell. So, sorry.

By the time you see this well, Wednesday will be the easiest day next to Sunday. I do mean hours-wise. Sundays are never easy, and you know why. Every day, B III is dead. Or is he? I can’t be sure what book I’m reading right now. But I have the papers right here, Echo.

Braxton in a box… $779.56
Fixing The Air Conditioner… $630.00
Birthdays and Boobies attempts… $290.00
To Adopt Virgil Vivi… $150.00

Now, who should I be more pissed at? If I hadn’t become so indifferent towards B, the box wouldn’t have been necessary. His picture frame, two pendants, last meds, presents. Playing the Devil’s Advocate… I got $150 from Braxton’s grandma. And that was used 559 days later for Virgil Vivi…

But over the past three weeks, I have spent $1,070. And all for what? I keep saying this, don’t I, Inspector? I would rather burn. And yes, I am entirely aware (fuck you, Hemingway “LY”) that this is all my fault. Um, the boobs and the boy, sure, but I didn’t fuck up the AC. And again, I have no right to complain when I look at the everyday bills. I swear right now, Inspector. I thought the moment my “father” saw Virgil, if he called him a mutt or anything, I would fight. I’d probably lose (yes fuck you, Hemingway). But to leave, Echo? So back to swearing… if my “father” talks about me paying for other home improvements, he can have this place.

Well, fuck, it’s his anyway, to be precise. Where will I go? What will I do? I can’t take V with me, so I’ll send him back. As they say in The Handmaid’s Tale, by his hand. Mine or his? All I wanted to do this month to Existence/Emergence day is live. Maybe some steak. Hell! Learn more about Virgil and, like Braxton, keep him safe and comfortable. That’s all. Ok, you got me… I could look at some titties too. While I’m here. At the Day Job, “I’m here.” But from the 7th to the 26th… Am I still here on the 31st? And fuck even seeing E-Day Echo. Nice, where B is? Is V mad? I am, I’m here. B Nice, V’s Mad

577 Days Without B III, Day 018 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 054 ~B Making Mistakes V~

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A mistake is my waking up this morning. It’s telling Virgil he’ll be fine when he’s hacking up a storm like B would before his meds. It’s wanting desperately to believe in reincarnation. How about calling “family” for anything? “B Making Mistakes V.”

Wednesday, August 24, 2022

Saga 054 ~B Making Mistakes V~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Chasing the money is a mistake. But compared to all the other ones in my existence.

Of course, I’ll always bring up the greatest mistake I made. I killed Braxton. Inspector, I’m going to be doing a lot of crying today. My first tears should always be for my boy. And speaking of boys, what about Virgil? I’m a bad man Inspector; thus, my weekly confessions. Oh, and fuck you, Hemingway. LY-words. I swear what’s wrong with them; pardon my French.

Regarding speaking, Virgil hasn’t had one day without a coughing fit or several. And what am I doing to help him? Billionaires make a lot of mistakes, human-wise. But with fur babies? Haven’t I said before I’m broke? I’m losing more and more by the day. And I’m making excuses… The “Walk in” contract and “Soul Braiding.” Talk about reincarnation

But before I can think of finding an “animal communicator,” There’s today’s great fear, E. He’s coming. My old man. Wasn’t that the problem? And now he has to see his mistake of a son and why? I paid $380 for something that broke in less than two weeks. I’ll burn. Inspector, I ain’t paying again when this was all him, but what about Virgil’s environment. 11 days Inspector and I’m not sending him back. As much as everything screams such. So, can I keep him away from my “father?” What will he think? And V with his coughing? There is a reason Braxton and I are family, all alone. Two against the world, Inspector. Tell me, is it a mistake? This seems like punishment.

Is it my ass is finally getting Jobed as in the “Book of Job.” But I’m not one for God. Inspector, my body is wracked with sickness, and my head is fucked up with grossness. Hell! I didn’t tell you what I did yesterday, but (sigh) I’m starting back at one again. I swear porn really is the Devil next to my “father.” Inspector, again I’ll burn than spend money. I’m losing tons of it every day. There is still V to consider, and if things keep up this way? What happened to Braxton is my greatest sin, but you see the date, Inspector? Fuck! Waking up to this another year, every single morning… NOPE! Why make more mistakes, Inspector Echo? B Making Mistakes V

570 Days Without B III, Day 011 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Log 310 ~Willy Time, Slow Time~

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Wasn’t I here last week, lost to the porn, worried about my pup, trying to find anything else to worry about besides the proponents of the puppet in the White House. The things one finds to do. Willy Time, Slow Time

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

Log 310 ~Willy Time, Slow Time~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and if I were white with a rich Daddy, this would have happened overnight. Making that kind of money takes time, and I have that. Yet again, though, I ask myself, what have I been doing with mine, time being money?

Well, of course, sex Inspector Echo, what else is there? Having finished, The Eve of a Cherry, I find myself lost on what to do next. I shot down somebody looking for a Beta reader but can’t find any for myself ever. When somebody calls your work, “interesting?” Hell time flies reading but goes ever so slow when you’re EDITING. The only thing slower is me finding some girl to… yeah, I know not a compliment. Still, I’ve told adult entertainers no and when I finally broke. It wasn’t with, Call me a Legend, but how many ticks and tocks have I wasted playing that game these past few days? I remember playing, Heavy Rain, a certain way because I wanted to see Madison Paige strip. I won’t speak evil of Call me a Legend though, I don’t have time to tear myself down today.

Seeing as how this conversation is two days ahead, you know today is. Star Wars Day, which means I have plenty of movies to watch. One more day I’m taking off and SIGH, I have to watch the video from my Day Job. Fear takes more out of me than anything. So what has scared me today? Not much other than walking My Dæmon and hearing the sounds of construction. I remember when I was a child running through the woods so fast, and the house seemed so far. Even at thirty-five, I can go back to that moment. The wonders of time Inspector Echo.

Not anymore, though, like most days, I have fallen into a routine. I wake up late, have these conversations, post the one from two days ago. I usually fall into a nap and wake up late again to work on my book. I “want” to read, and somehow end up playing The Walking Dead or Call me a Legend. Dinner, and then there are the nights where I stay up until one or two doing well “stuff and thangs.” The worse thing about time… my kid winding down, the stairs are his test these days.

Sadness, Willy Time, Slow Time.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 303 ~In Lust Will Trust~

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Just waking up or heading to bed, a late night shower, or before having to deal with people in the plague era. I tell myself it could always be worse, and I don’t have to ask the question, “Am I A Psycho,” great song by the way. “In Lust Will Trust.”

Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Log 303 ~In Lust Will Trust~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Well, that’s because I don’t drink, though if I were a chick… Yes, I know Inspector Echo, that’s disrespectful to women. One more addiction I have, right? Well, I don’t smoke, I’ve never done HARD drugs. Unlike people in this day and age, I’ve never been addicted to social life. Hell several books written, none published. My blog will have been around three years in a few months. My poetry phase about The Winx Club when I was on LSD. I wish I could say I was only addicted to writing.

Trigging Factor: Blog 503 Error

  1. Cherry’s Glossy Lips
  2. Boob Search
  3. Katee Owen
  4. Holly Bryn
  5. Elizabeth Hurley
  6. Alyssa Milano
  7. Holly Marie Combs (Breaking Point)

Again I’m not a drinker. I figured alcoholics would drink anything for their buzz. As for me, you see, I’m always one for the “Top Shelf” HELLO. Not funny, but I do have a problem. With all this time off, I could start back with Brainbuddy, but like the WWE Network, I wouldn’t be watching it. Of course, I’ve started seeing ads again for Covenant Eyes, but “THEY” also think I’m a Republican and a Trump Supporter. Now let me say some things about Trump and watch me get into trouble. No Inspector Echo I go no further than the second circle. You know how Bruce Banner said That’s my secret, Cap. I’m always angry.

That’s my secret, Inspector. I’m always horny. Only yesterday, I was trying to convince myself that’s what love is… I’m not wrong. There’s no question.

Love is wild, insatiable, insane, at times, immoral. Don’t believe me, let something harm My Dæmon, and see that I won’t burn this world to ash to protect him. Anger, though, I can let go. We’re still amidst the plague, which is keeping me away from people for the most part. Lust though is everywhere, and I’ve told you before I can’t be the typical guy. One of those, see a naked girl, nut, and go to bed. I didn’t know who Katee Owen and Holly Bryn were until last night. If anything, that’s why I want to make LUST my profession because I practice, it’s not a phase, and I write plenty of prose.

Is it destroying me, though? I’m better than this, sorry, but In Lust Will Trust.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 296 ~Prose And Political Willies~

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I should really consider making a pseudonym, I mean I’m not a rich white guy that can say STUPID things or a pretty woman that can say naughty ones. Yet here I am, worried about my “writing” and the fate of the country. “Prose And Political Willies.”

Wednesday, April 22, 2020

Log 296 ~Prose And Political Willies~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means this moment, I would be involved in both. With all the fears I hold upon this Earth, why go about making more, right? Well, of course, with finishing yet one more novel, I need something to worry about. Am I sick, is some girl mad at me, will I be able to sleep tonight? Yes, I still remember, I’m supposed to be worrying about My Dæmon. My words, though, are like my money; when I think I’m beginning to catch up… And It’s Gone.

Has there ever been a day in my life where there was nothing? It’s the very reason I stay in bed come “The Day.” It’s sort of a throwback to being safe and warm before I was introduced to the world. Don’t ask me how that popped up, I should be talking about my novel that no one will ever read. I’m worried that it will be one more story that dies like my Six Impossible Things list every week. I still have until the end of the month for editing, and then what? Will I go back to blaming my Day Job once again?

Hell will I even have a job; reminds me I need to watch the CEO’s message. I know I still owe you an explanation as to why I think this all happened, plague and everything. Last night while I was still basking in the glow of my finished work, I got mad. It was a bid to avoid this morning’s feelings. This country is a screwed up place. Where doctors who are trying to save lives have to now stand against those who couldn’t care less? Ask me why should I be concerned? Other than the stores being empty and the new rules, I was living inside anyway whenever I got the chance. If I was getting sick, why did I make it to the table today? Again it’s a sin to find one problem, project, or penis erecting babe to take my mind off of everything else. You won’t hold it against me to say “penis” after my “PORN.”

How dare I call it erotica? Still, I’m the bad guy while others doom the world. How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, I should start reading again, that helps?

For now, I’m sorry, Inspector Echo; Prose and Political Willies.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 289 ~The Mask Of Willy~

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Last week I talked about fearing to be different and not wanting to hide. All of this would explain not leaving the house and being wrapped up in blankets. At least my kid can see my face until I take a shower and get STUPID. The Mask Of Willy.

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

Log 289 ~The Mask Of Willy~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but is it because I’m doing something positive? Chris Rock said something to the tune of a black man must be positive. In this country, it must be all good works. Of course, white people can create, capitalize, or conquer whatever they want. Excuse me for getting a bit racial. What I’m getting at today is that even if I had everything, I couldn’t imagine smiling. Happiness has become that much of a foreign concept. Besides that, every day, it’s like I’m hiding, and someday it’s all going to come out.

Here I am in a world that wants us to literally wear a mask, but do I? No, I’m too afraid of one more humiliation. I hear about people being accused of being criminals. Indeed, I might get sick, but as long as I’m what? I don’t even know anymore, Inspector Echo. If there’s something I can be sure of, it’s that I’m all sorts of lazy. Right now, I’m all wrapped up in blankets, and I could give you a dozen or so lame excuses. Last night I had a coughing fit and thought I was getting sick. It was only something caught in my throat. Speaking of which, I continue to ask the question of why do I write. Could you imagine me singing like Akon to Cherry or M Anime? I text all the time, “I wanna (love) you, you already know.” Love… that’s a dirty word considering my true motives, so yeah, what’s this about masks.

My writing is a mask because I’m not a rich white guy. I also refuse to be a STUPID black one. Yeah, I heard what I said, and you would be right to call me an “Uncle Tom” like Surgeon General Jerome Adams. At least “The Eve of a Cherry” is fiction, for the most part. Sex makes me feel “decent,” but like any other drug, it becomes consuming. As of this moment, 2 days, 17 hrs., 48 min, 36 secs of NO FAP. Will I make it the week (today is Monday)? Inspector Echo, why don’t you tell me how one is to mask desire? I have rage sure, and Zorro hid behind this persona. I guess like going to the store I won’t wear the mask and the sickness is always there waiting.

I’m sorry, Inspector Echo, for FEAR, The Mask Of Willy.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 282 ~Will To Be Different~

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Worse advice I’ve ever received, be yourself, the best advice is the same, and I haven’t erased such speeches from my motivations yet. People don’t want me to be myself, they want me to be a particular version, and so I try. Will To Be Different

Wednesday, April 8, 2020

Log 282 ~Will To Be Different~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Unless I invested in the WWE or my porno fixation. How about I buy-in with that drug Trump’s hocking? For now, the only number I’m “obsessed” with is how long I’ve kept it in my pants. Well’s there an App, of course, but a friend introduced me to a much better one. I still hate Math, but numbers, time, word counts, lists make me feel better. So as per usual, anything that makes me feel good is wrong or at least different, so here we go.

Inspector Echo, you know that gun I just bought that’s freaking me out? To quote the movie Snowpiercer (2013), “They’ve got no bullets!” Now it’s not like the store was out entirely, but I lacked the courage to pick some or gasps ask. I wish I could tell you that’s the only reason, I haven’t been sleeping, I did order some Saturday night though. Why I’m not sleeping, well Girls, Girls, Girls. From Whitney Wright to Lily Bowman, Little Lupe, the list goes on. I’m amazed I’ve lasted at present (8 days, 21 hr, 57 min, and 15 sec). I’ve mentioned FEAR, or let’s say general embarrassment, and you know what I’ve been harping over. It’s that lady that was yelling at me because I have to grow accustomed to the Coronavirus (COVID-19) world. Even in a blooming apocalypse, I continue to be the odd man out; give me zombies.

Well, even if the universe did, would I be upset that I was alive instead of dead? I would go get myself bitten because I don’t like how the Walkers are looking at me. I’m not scared of getting sick, I fear not having a mask and looking out of place. How messed up is that? Not more than writing a book that no one will ever read. I’ve written 10,000 more words for The Eve of Cherry, and not one of them will be published. Only I keep on writing about a wide arrange of girls I’m not with. My hands aren’t in my pants, so isn’t that a win. Win William Bridgman, one of my protagonists or antagonists, I’m not sure. It’s like trying to count up how many “adult” scenes I’ve written out. How many people side with sex over some murders?

I’m sorry, Inspector Echo, such fears Will To Be Different.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 275 ~Words Will Be Infectious~

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I’m sick, and no, not with “the beverage” as Tony Baler puts it, I’m sick of words, Grammarly, my novella’s, what the Day Job has to say, “indefinitely.” Now I have all the time in the world to write. Words Will Be Infectious

Wednesday, April 01, 2020

Log 275 ~Words Will Be Infectious~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which would mean I am a ghost. Now I’m not considering that I’ll die, and all my work will make my Dæmon, my Olds, and little sister wealthy. You know how I plan to make my money, and people won’t be paying to see me ever. I want to be Dennis Hof, but even now, I doubt I could ever be that open. The good news is you can’t with the Coronavirus (COVID-19) going around. Okay, so the bad news is I have more time to work on editing my novella, The Eve of a Cherry.

You’re saying, “Hol’ Up A Minute!” isn’t this Lady Sophia’s wheelhouse? One of these days, I’ll tell her the story of Pontypool Changes Everything. Anyway, I want to talk about, well, let’s start with “swear words.” Long story short, I think they are crass, but every word has its time and place. So that gets me back into why it takes me a while to talk to you, Inspector Echo. As I said, I’ve been working on The Eve of a Cherry, and do you want to know what I think about it? See, I don’t even want to put that out into the world. Okay, so with things I don’t want to put out into the world, texts, and emails from work. I won’t lie, and so the sin apparent is, I’m afraid to check. How often have I said I hate the Day Job? You know it’s needed.

I talked about being a Beta Reader once upon a time. For right now it’s directions, I don’t know if I’m just “me” or people are bad at giving them. Still, I listen, I’ve screwed up no less than three times today. If it’s not other people, I can’t follow the instructions I give myself. Didn’t I say I would wake up on time, shouldn’t I have gone to the store. Even this second, I should be reading but worrying about the Day Job. See now would be an excellent time to swear, but I’m still practicing self-censorship. Yeah, watch me share my novella with Cherry, and I’ll get arrested. I’m not worried about the Coronavirus, to be honest, but more so how the story will know remembrance one day.

It’s not the people or Dæmon, only the words, I’m Sorry; Words Will Be Infectious.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 268 ~Will’s Six Of Excuses~

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How many times at the Day Job did I utter the words just another day, so when I came back to the house, exhausted who could blame me for not working on my dream. Now I’m too busy watching Shusaku until 2:00 in the morning. Will’s “Six” Of Excuses yep

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Log 268 ~Will’s Six Of Excuses~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which in this country means I must not be working too hard. Let me say this out in the open, my biggest excuse for not doing something was the Day Job. So here I am, three days in isolation, I still have eight days before I hear from work and what have I accomplished? I guess this is a good experiment seeing where I stand on writing full time. Five thousand words daily, I haven’t gotten close. What about reading The Gargoyle or listening to another book, well I’m here now.

As I said, I should have all of my work by now. The words I do get on the page, around 1500, are so despicable and vile. Yes, I know, leave it to Lady Sophia, but yeah, I’m embarrassed. I guess that doesn’t go away even when I’m all alone, my son and me. Speaking of friends, shouldn’t I be getting back to M Anime? She’s still on the front lines, and I can’t say, I’m exhausted, I nap all day, case and point. I even dreamed that you and I had this conversation Echo. Well, Michonne was high last night (today’s Monday) talk about losing time. I already talked about reading, didn’t I? My life comes back to that always. The words are calling me, and still, I won’t listen to Eric Thomas. You have to learn to give up sleep; when will I.

After The Walking Dead, I could have gone to bed, but I decided to “research” my novella, right? There’s this one scene in “Shusaku Replay 3” (if you look that up, it’s your fault. Anyway, it’s between Kaori Maejima and Ayaka Minami. Okay, if I’m not watching stuff like that, how about catching up on “better” TV. I miss Into The Badlands, The Handmaid’s Tale, A Million Little Things. Thanks to the Coronavirus (COVID-19) wrestling will never be the same. Inspector Echo they are even postponing The Olympics. Finally, why aren’t I watching more of the news? Working at the Day Job, dealing with my Olds and everything else, it felt like my world was falling apart every day. I’m starting to have nightmares these days instead of staying informed.

Inspector Echo, I’m sorry I blame my Day Job and that I even stick with it. I apologize for my excuses. Will’s “Six” Of Excuses

I Will Have No Fear